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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00The surgery. What can I say about it? Other than that, it changed everything. All it took
00:00:13was my whole life. All that pain. All that struggle. And eight hours under anesthesia,
00:00:30I went from a caterpillar to a butterfly. And now, I'm me. Can't you see? I'm finally
00:00:47me. Can't you see me for who I truly am? What more do I have to do?
00:00:55Okay, thanks. That's enough.
00:00:57Uh, sorry.
00:00:58No, that was great. Thanks for that.
00:01:02As you know, the casting call is for a transgender male or transgender female. Just for our records,
00:01:09which one are you?
00:01:11Oh, uh, um, trans man. Trans male. Trans man.
00:01:17Great, thanks. We'll be in contact.
00:01:29Hey, I just got out of the audition, which was a little...
00:01:38Yeah, on that front, bad news.
00:01:42Wait, they already passed? I was just up there 30 seconds ago.
00:01:48Yeah, sorry Leo. They said they're going in a different direction.
00:01:52Different direction. Well, at least they're efficient.
00:01:58Onwards and upwards. Look, the real reason I'm calling is because you're confirmed.
00:02:03The callback?
00:02:04Yep, the callback. It's Monday, 2 p.m. at the production offices. They want you to read
00:02:09the same scene, so I'll send you the size.
00:02:11I already have it memorized.
00:02:13Wonderful. You're gonna kill it.
00:02:15Zip. Zap. Zap. Zap. Zip. Zap. Zap. Zip. Zap. Zap. Zip.
00:02:31Got it.
00:02:42Are you okay?
00:02:44Yeah, I'm just tired.
00:02:58Remember, Leo, you are a worm. You're not pretending to be a worm, okay? Loosen up.
00:03:15So, I'm auditioning because it's like a teenage, teenage vampire.
00:03:20Really? That's awesome. You're gonna be like a vampire?
00:03:25Um, I mean, I'm gonna be a human.
00:03:28Oh, okay. Oh, so you're just gonna go out in the wild?
00:03:31Yeah, but I might turn into a vampire, like, later on, if it all goes well.
00:03:35That's so cool.
00:03:44Hi. Sorry I'm late.
00:04:15Ugh.
00:04:28I feel like I came this close to booking. My agent said they pinned me.
00:04:34That's fantastic.
00:04:36It'd be fantastic to book, but...
00:04:40Yeah? How was your audition?
00:04:43They passed, but, um, I do have this callback for...
00:04:47The serious regular thing?
00:04:48Yeah.
00:04:49Leo, that's great.
00:04:50Yeah, I feel really...
00:04:51Wait, do you see my shirt?
00:04:53Oh, um...
00:04:57Oh, there you go.
00:04:59Would you wanna, um, go to this reading my friend's doing this weekend?
00:05:05Sure.
00:05:09But not, like, as a date, right?
00:05:12Totally.
00:05:13Because I don't want to ruin our dynamic.
00:05:17I think we work really well together as scene partners.
00:05:20I definitely wouldn't want to mess up our classroom chemistry.
00:05:25Good. I'm glad we're on the same page.
00:05:36What are you doing tonight?
00:05:38I've got a date.
00:05:39Cool.
00:05:41What are you up to?
00:05:43Uh, going to a friend's party, I think.
00:05:47Fun.
00:05:49Yeah.
00:06:03Hello?
00:06:04Surprise!
00:06:06Surprise!
00:06:11Squirrel!
00:06:13Squirrel.
00:06:15You gorgeous creature.
00:06:19Ah, you look so different!
00:06:22A year in vitamin tea will do that.
00:06:24Vitamin tea?
00:06:25That's right, that's right.
00:06:26Oh my god, right. Of course, of course.
00:06:29Come on in.
00:06:30Okay.
00:06:35You really don't have to roll out the red carpet.
00:06:38I'm only staying a night.
00:06:40That's fine.
00:06:41Well, thank you.
00:06:43So, what are you doing in New York?
00:06:46Just passing through. You know, living my usual nomad life during the summer.
00:06:51And when I realized that I'd be driving through the city to go upstate, I couldn't resist.
00:06:59And I think you should come with me.
00:07:01I couldn't.
00:07:04I'm not taking no for an answer.
00:07:06No, really.
00:07:08No, really.
00:07:11I really can't.
00:07:18I really can't.
00:07:23What?
00:07:24Eleanor.
00:07:26I am not going.
00:07:28I'm taking it right away.
00:07:30What is going on?
00:07:38Oh my god.
00:07:54Oh, hey.
00:07:56Uh, you want me to clear out?
00:07:59Nah.
00:08:01We used to change in front of each other all the time, right?
00:08:04Right.
00:08:09Coffee?
00:08:11Ooh, yes, please.
00:08:13So I hear nothing for three weeks, and then out of nowhere, out of the blue,
00:08:18I get a call from a new number, and he said,
00:08:20Oh, sorry, I dropped my flip phone.
00:08:22Flip phone?
00:08:23In a bucket of paint at an art gathering.
00:08:26Okay.
00:08:27What the fuck is an art gathering?
00:08:29And then I was like, but you were posting on Instagram, and he was like,
00:08:32Yeah, I did it from my iPad.
00:08:35So?
00:08:36So I kept fucking him until he disappeared again.
00:08:41You really know how to pick them.
00:08:43I'm nothing if not consistent.
00:08:46Are you?
00:08:47At least I'm consistent in my inconsistency.
00:08:50But you and Will are good?
00:08:52Oh, yeah.
00:08:53I'm glad we got back together.
00:08:55He's, um, less awful than the other guys I've been with.
00:08:59A glowing compliment.
00:09:01You know what I mean.
00:09:03What's he up to?
00:09:05He was on part of the road trip.
00:09:07We actually did a project together, combining his drawings and my photographs.
00:09:10It was very romantic.
00:09:12What's the project?
00:09:14People and signage, speed limits, stop signs, public spaces, private life.
00:09:23All these little commandments everywhere.
00:09:26Still not fully formed yet.
00:09:28But yeah, how's life as a Broadway host?
00:09:30Oh, you know.
00:09:31No, I don't.
00:09:32Give me all the juicy details.
00:09:34I do have this callback for a serious thing.
00:09:37Leo!
00:09:39That's huge!
00:09:41I hope so.
00:09:42I mean, it would feel really good to book something.
00:09:45And then I could say my oldest friend is the Leo Mark.
00:09:48Eleanor, stop.
00:09:50Don't forget about me when you're famous, okay?
00:09:52Right.
00:09:54I mean it.
00:09:56I won't.
00:09:58Good.
00:10:26Bye.
00:10:28Bye.
00:10:56Wow.
00:11:08It's lovely.
00:11:09Friends of friends in high places.
00:11:14Isn't it?
00:11:16And they're just letting us stay here?
00:11:20Yeah, I met her at an arts residency and Lila said I could stay here whenever she's not here.
00:11:24Dibs.
00:12:21Sit with me.
00:12:31You should put on a bathing suit.
00:12:33The sun feels so good on my skin.
00:12:36I'm good as am.
00:12:38Suit yourself.
00:12:49Hey, this is Will.
00:12:50You know what to do.
00:12:59What?
00:13:20I think we should go shopping.
00:13:22I've got the urge to splurge.
00:13:24Shit.
00:13:35Oh dear.
00:13:40Do you want to try anything on?
00:13:43I mean it's a women's store.
00:13:44Ah, right, right.
00:13:46Sorry.
00:13:47Sorry.
00:13:53Oh.
00:13:56She's cute.
00:13:58Yeah.
00:14:07Remember when we used to go to Savers?
00:14:10They'd get, what, ten pounds of clothes for ten dollars?
00:14:13I still have some of that stuff.
00:14:15Some really good shit.
00:14:17Okay.
00:14:20What do you think?
00:14:21It's nice.
00:14:23Nice?
00:14:25I'm not an expert on women's fashion.
00:14:28It is cute.
00:14:30Flattering?
00:14:31Sure, sure.
00:14:32Well, I like it.
00:14:34Will you check the tag and see how much it is?
00:14:45Sixty-five.
00:14:47Woof.
00:14:49We're not in Savers anymore, are we, Toto?
00:14:51No, we're not.
00:14:56Should we steal it?
00:14:58What?
00:14:59We can put it in my bag.
00:15:00I don't know.
00:15:03I'm kidding.
00:15:04Right.
00:15:06I'm going to wear it out, though.
00:15:20Eleanor?
00:15:24Were you actually joking?
00:15:26Of course.
00:15:27We're not in college anymore.
00:15:28I can afford it.
00:15:31Right.
00:15:48I mean it.
00:15:49You have family in me.
00:15:51Just because you refuse to see it doesn't mean it's not true.
00:15:54You don't have to be blood to be family.
00:15:58You know, I feel like our bond is deeper than biology.
00:16:02Whether you like it or not, we're both pretty connected.
00:16:05Yikes.
00:16:07Sorry.
00:16:09Was that for your callback?
00:16:11Yep.
00:16:12Dialogue's a little much, huh?
00:16:15I guess.
00:16:16I don't know.
00:16:17I think it's kind of nice.
00:16:19Totally.
00:16:23It's just nice to have a character that's not just,
00:16:26you know, transitioning the whole time.
00:16:29Right.
00:16:30Well, whenever you want to practice, I am ready.
00:16:33I'm going to draw upon my long and storied career as a chorus member from my sixth grade production of Oklahoma.
00:16:40Awkward.
00:16:41I forgot.
00:16:42An acting legend stands before me.
00:16:44Don't be shocked when I act in circles around you.
00:16:53Wine.
00:16:58I think I should move.
00:17:00Again?
00:17:01Again, again, again.
00:17:03But I thought you liked Durham.
00:17:05I do, but I also don't like getting stuck places, you know?
00:17:13What about Will?
00:17:15Well, Will is transportable.
00:17:19Sorry.
00:17:29So, moving?
00:17:32It's always a thought.
00:17:33You know me.
00:17:37Do the thing.
00:17:39What thing?
00:17:40You know.
00:17:41Squirrel!
00:17:42Squirrel!
00:17:44Oh, you learner.
00:17:48I never told you this in college, but you'd be holding court at some party and I would be hanging on the edge,
00:17:57wondering when you were going to figure out how much cooler than me you were.
00:18:01I would fantasize about doing something, I don't know, cool enough to keep your attention.
00:18:08Like what?
00:18:10Something impulsive.
00:18:12Like?
00:18:13I don't know.
00:18:14Steal a car, go for a joyride, you know, throw caution to the wind.
00:18:19You never quite did that.
00:18:21No, I didn't.
00:18:23I do remember seeing you, though, at parties, at your most painfully socially awkward looking at me.
00:18:31I always wondered what you were thinking.
00:18:33Well, now you know.
00:18:35Yeah, but it makes sense.
00:18:37You're an actor, you're shy in real life, but on stage you're...
00:18:44Whereas with me, well, everywhere you go it's theater.
00:18:50Yeah.
00:18:55I think we should go out.
00:18:57Oh, really?
00:18:58Yeah, it's happy hour.
00:19:00We should hit the town, have a few drinks, have a few laughs.
00:19:04I haven't heard that one since college.
00:19:06Well, it's still true.
00:19:08The afternoon is young.
00:19:10Or old.
00:19:12But the night is still barely nascent.
00:19:14Yes, but I am very old now.
00:19:16Let's go, please.
00:19:19Please, please, please, please.
00:19:21Sure.
00:19:22Yes!
00:19:35What is this?
00:19:51Come on, loosen up.
00:19:53I am loose.
00:19:54I'm loose.
00:20:05We've been hooking up for a year.
00:20:09A year?
00:20:11Yeah, but we're just friends.
00:20:14Oh, really?
00:20:16Yes, really.
00:20:18I mean, if she wanted more, I'm sure she would have.
00:20:23I mean, I'm sure she would have.
00:20:25I mean, I'm sure she would have.
00:20:28I mean, I'm sure she would have.
00:20:32If she wanted more, I...
00:20:36But I respect her boundary.
00:20:39She wants to keep it professional.
00:20:42Except when you're having sex.
00:20:45I just want someone to love me like Rita Wilson loves Tom Hanks.
00:20:50What?
00:20:51They famously love each other.
00:20:53A lot.
00:20:54I read a listicle about it.
00:20:57Well, you deserve an epic look like that.
00:21:02I'd just be happy with something a little more stable.
00:21:13But, um, yeah, I'm totally fine with the no strings thing.
00:21:20Totally.
00:21:23My own arts practice is really informed by being on the road.
00:21:28Not to get too Kerouac, but the freedom of the open road really frees me.
00:21:34I love Kerouac.
00:21:37Me too.
00:21:39Go to the bathroom.
00:21:41Oh, cool.
00:21:43So what's the longest you've ever driven in one go?
00:21:48Fifteen hours.
00:21:50Fifteen hours?
00:21:53Wow.
00:22:20So, how do they compare to your boyfriends?
00:22:46I'm not gonna, you know, size-wise put you in competition.
00:22:52You both have beautiful, artistic hands.
00:22:57Um, sorry.
00:22:59I think I'm gonna head out.
00:23:02Um, sorry, he's my ride.
00:23:05I've gotta go.
00:23:08Good to meet you.
00:23:11Bye.
00:23:17Bye.
00:23:27You know, you could have stayed if you wanted to.
00:23:29I know. I just hate Kerouac.
00:23:33And I'd never cheat on Will. It's just nice to flirt a little.
00:23:47Bye.
00:24:07You want dinner?
00:24:09No, I'm good. I think I'm gonna just hang out here for a minute.
00:24:14Okay.
00:24:16Night, sweetie.
00:24:44I love you.
00:25:14Whenever you're ready.
00:25:26If I hadn't come, what would you have done?
00:25:28Something desperate.
00:25:30No, seriously, what would you have done?
00:25:32Paid my respects and left quietly.
00:25:34These assholes are the only ones who want to turn it into a whole thing.
00:25:38You can't expect to just show up here and know nothing.
00:25:41I mean, you look like Holly Golightly for Christ's sake.
00:25:45Are you slut-shaming me?
00:25:46Maria, I couldn't turn up to my estranged father's funeral looking like shit, could I?
00:25:53I know that was a lot.
00:25:55What they did wasn't cool.
00:25:58Oh, threatening to have me arrested for trespassing wasn't cool?
00:26:01You know what I mean.
00:26:02You haven't saved me, AJ.
00:26:04That's not—
00:26:05Showing up here didn't fix anything for me.
00:26:07I just wanted to make sure you were okay.
00:26:11Why do you care so much?
00:26:14Because—
00:26:16Because you're my family, Maria.
00:26:19Right.
00:26:22Family.
00:26:27I don't have any family.
00:26:32I mean it.
00:26:35You have family in me.
00:26:37Just because you refuse to see it doesn't mean it's not true.
00:26:41You don't have to be blood to be family.
00:26:44Our bond is deeper than biology.
00:26:49Whether you like it or not, we're irrevocably connected.
00:26:51Ever since that day at the crash pad.
00:26:54We've been linked.
00:26:57I messed up a line.
00:26:58No, you read them fine.
00:27:03I just thought maybe you're being a little gentle.
00:27:07Like, where's the energy?
00:27:09The passion?
00:27:14Why don't you try the monologue again, but this time maybe, like, angry.
00:27:21Why would I be angry?
00:27:23Maria's kind of a bitch, right?
00:27:26Kind of.
00:27:27Right. She doesn't listen.
00:27:29So you have to really get through to her.
00:27:31Like, really shake her.
00:27:33I guess I just kind of was thinking about AJ as if he, you know, was a gentle person.
00:27:38When he's making a point, he wouldn't be, like, in her face.
00:27:41Yeah, but I feel like at this point it'd be a really big breaking point for him.
00:27:46I think you want to wow the director, so you should just try something different, right?
00:27:53Yeah, maybe I could try it angrier.
00:27:57Yeah, just the monologue. Just, like, come on. Like, really give it to her. Come on.
00:28:01Yeah, I'm gonna be the line leading it.
00:28:11I don't have any family.
00:28:16I mean it.
00:28:18You have family in me. Just because you refuse to see it doesn't mean it's not true.
00:28:24Whether you like it or not, we're irrevocably connected.
00:28:28Ever since that day at the crash pad, we've been linked.
00:28:32You're not perfect.
00:28:35Neither am I.
00:28:37But we're perfect in our imperfection.
00:28:41Two warped puzzle pieces that manage to fit just right.
00:28:47You fit me.
00:28:49And I fit you.
00:28:52So yeah, Rhea, you have family.
00:28:55It may not be those people in the church, but you got family standing right in front of you.
00:29:03How was that?
00:29:07I think it's getting there.
00:29:10It felt so weird.
00:29:12We can keep working on it.
00:29:15Fuck, I really don't want to fuck this up.
00:29:17You won't.
00:29:19You'll get there.
00:29:23And then I say, we fit, I guess, in our own misshapen way.
00:29:28And now you're supposed to put your palm against my palm and we interlace fingers.
00:29:33Right.
00:29:50It might not be those people in that church, but you have family standing right in front of you.
00:29:57So?
00:29:59Um.
00:30:00Um?
00:30:02Honestly?
00:30:03Yes, honestly.
00:30:05Why are you yelling?
00:30:06I have literally no idea.
00:30:08My friend gave me all these directions and now I'm totally lost.
00:30:12You were fine before.
00:30:14Fuck.
00:30:15Shut your head and don't run lines with her again.
00:30:22I kind of wish it was just you and me up here.
00:30:26Oh yeah?
00:30:27Yeah.
00:30:30That's sweet.
00:30:33Is everything okay?
00:30:35I'm happy to run lines and stuff, but the guy that I've been dating, he wants to be exclusive.
00:30:43Yeah.
00:30:45That's, I mean, I'm cool with that.
00:30:48Neither of us wanted anything, right?
00:30:50Yeah.
00:30:52But I guess now I want something with this guy.
00:30:55So.
00:30:58I hope that's okay?
00:31:01Of course.
00:31:02Thanks for being so chill.
00:31:03And seriously, run lines by yourself this weekend.
00:31:07Bye.
00:31:14There you go.
00:31:20Leo?
00:31:23Coming.
00:31:35You okay? You look like someone died.
00:31:39No, I'm good.
00:31:42Farm store?
00:32:03Ooh, these are gorge.
00:32:09It's a potted plant, so.
00:32:12Put it in your hair.
00:32:16Hi.
00:32:19How are vegetables so expensive?
00:32:22Inflation.
00:32:25Fuck.
00:32:27What?
00:32:28Just this person from acting classes here.
00:32:30Don't look, Eleanor.
00:32:32Why can't you say hi?
00:32:34Because he's on a really big show right now.
00:32:36So?
00:32:37He's really good on it.
00:32:39Leo?
00:32:41Leo!
00:32:43Oliver!
00:32:44Hi, it's so good to see you.
00:32:46It's been a minute.
00:32:48So, what are you doing here?
00:32:51I'm just up here for the weekend.
00:32:53Oh, Joe's parents have a house up here, so we're here, like, all the time.
00:32:57Oh, this is my friend Joe.
00:32:59Nice to meet you.
00:33:00Hi.
00:33:01You too.
00:33:04And I'm Eleanor.
00:33:06Sorry, this is my friend Eleanor.
00:33:09Well, hi.
00:33:11Hi, Eleanor.
00:33:13So, how are you?
00:33:15I'm good.
00:33:16I just, I should say, congratulations on Sanford House.
00:33:20I've been watching the show and you're so wonderful in it.
00:33:24You don't have to say that, though.
00:33:25Leo was just saying how good you are in it.
00:33:28It's just a great show.
00:33:30Wait, wait, wait.
00:33:31I'm having, like, a brain blast moment.
00:33:33Oh, yeah?
00:33:34Okay, no pressure at all, but you two should totally come over to my place for, like, snacks.
00:33:39I mean, we came here for cheese and crackers.
00:33:40It'd be so lovely to share.
00:33:42I think we have afternoon plans.
00:33:44They're easily changeable.
00:33:45Okay, so change them.
00:33:47Look, we'll stay in the store a little bit longer, buy a few things, and then we'll meet you outside?
00:33:52Hell yeah.
00:33:53All right, cool.
00:33:54Amazing.
00:33:55Okay, see you.
00:33:59What is your problem?
00:34:02He just was, like, the only other trans guy in our acting class, and we weren't that close, and it kind of felt, I don't know, like there was some competition.
00:34:11Well, you're not in class now.
00:34:12No need to be competitive.
00:34:14Yeah.
00:34:16Are you annoyed with me because I seized the moment?
00:34:18If you don't want to go, we can back out.
00:34:20No.
00:34:21Actually, thank you.
00:34:23Let's do the socializing thing.
00:34:26See?
00:34:27Serendipity.
00:34:28Adventure.
00:34:31Adventure.
00:34:33Hello.
00:35:03Oh, no.
00:35:07What?
00:35:09Oh, my God.
00:35:10Thank you, Joe.
00:35:11That looks so good.
00:35:13That looks beautiful.
00:35:18I mean, I think a lot about, you know, art's ability to create meaningful change, right?
00:35:24I'm an actor because I believe movies are powerful engines for empathy, but sometimes I wonder what actually meaningfully changes.
00:35:33Like, I don't know, can you think of a movie that has changed the course of history, really?
00:35:38Uh, Cruising.
00:35:40You know, responsible for a huge homophobic backlash against queer men.
00:35:46Oh, no, Joe.
00:35:48But I love that movie.
00:35:50I mean, Al Pacino doing poppers in those tank tops.
00:35:53I don't know that one.
00:35:59But I'm sure it's better than what you've been auditioning for, am I right?
00:36:04I guess.
00:36:05You haven't saved me.
00:36:07AJ, come on, Leo.
00:36:09That's not what I...
00:36:11Showing up here didn't change anything for me.
00:36:13I just wanted to make sure you're okay.
00:36:17You know the lines?
00:36:19Yeah, uh, I auditioned.
00:36:22Wow, that is, yeah, it's just so crazy.
00:36:25We went in for the same part.
00:36:28Oh, they already passed on me.
00:36:31Yeah.
00:36:33So sorry.
00:36:34It's fine.
00:36:35I'm actually really glad that you're up for it.
00:36:38When Leo first read it, he was so quiet, but I'm trying to work with him and, you know, try to get him to be a little angry, you know?
00:36:44I kind of thought of AJ as a sort of gentle guy.
00:36:50Huh.
00:36:54Joe, remind me the name of this cheese?
00:36:57Uh, Camembert.
00:36:59Do you eat this?
00:37:00Yeah.
00:37:01Yeah, you can.
00:37:06Why didn't we talk about this kind of stuff when we were in class together?
00:37:09I don't know.
00:37:10I mean, we should have just been doing this the whole time.
00:37:13Yeah, right?
00:37:14Leo said you guys were a little competitive with each other.
00:37:17Eleanor.
00:37:18No, it's true.
00:37:19We were.
00:37:20I mean, we were competing for, like, the scraps of rolls they were throwing our way, but it all feels really stupid now.
00:37:29It does.
00:37:30Well, we're talking now.
00:37:33Cheers.
00:37:34Cheers.
00:37:35Oh, my God, this pool is everything.
00:37:37It was actually a little traumatizing.
00:37:40Maybe I'm not ready to keep this conversation going.
00:37:44Eleanor, we've totally been ignoring you.
00:37:46What about you?
00:37:47What do you do?
00:37:48Uh, I'm a photographer.
00:37:49I teach during the year and I travel every summer.
00:37:53Okay, that's enviable.
00:37:55It's nice to be free in that way.
00:37:57So, what college do you teach at?
00:38:01Oh, Eleanor teaches, like, at this really amazing high school.
00:38:04Oh, that's so cool.
00:38:05I mean, it must be really interesting to work with people that age.
00:38:08Yep.
00:38:09Eleanor has been living in Durham for, like, two years now, has this really cool boyfriend who's also an artist, and they went on this road trip together.
00:38:17Yep.
00:38:18Okay, how was that?
00:38:19Really romantic.
00:38:21He painted and I photographed.
00:38:25By that, he was drawing.
00:38:26Oh, drawing.
00:38:28Yeah, he usually is a painter, but because we were on the road, he was drawing because of the supplies and stuff.
00:38:34I was just texting him yesterday and he said he was really happy to be back home with his materials.
00:38:38Yeah, drawing.
00:38:39Yes.
00:38:42Uh, would anyone like some wine?
00:38:44Yeah, yeah.
00:38:45Oliver, do you want to come with me?
00:38:46No, no, no, you're good.
00:38:47Got it.
00:38:52You're being weird.
00:38:55How?
00:38:56I just feel like you're not being yourself.
00:38:59And what is me being myself, Eleanor?
00:39:01It just seems like you're performing.
00:39:04Maybe I'm just having a good time and feeling loose with them.
00:39:09Then why aren't you like that with me?
00:39:12I...
00:39:13I have to pee.
00:39:14I am.
00:39:36Hey, this is Will.
00:39:37Motherfucker.
00:39:45You're right, I was being weird.
00:39:49Good thing you know my love language.
00:39:52Let's just have fun.
00:40:05Come on, Leo.
00:40:10Are you serious right now?
00:40:12What?
00:40:13Okay, what's with the t-shirts?
00:40:16What do you mean?
00:40:18I feel like you're going to drown with all those clothes on.
00:40:23Eleanor.
00:40:25What?
00:40:27I'm wearing a shirt because I'm binding.
00:40:31Oh my god, I'm so sorry.
00:40:34It's fine.
00:40:36Why didn't you tell me?
00:40:45More wine?
00:40:47Oh look, check.
00:41:10What?
00:41:13Stop.
00:41:16Stop, no.
00:41:18Seriously, I have to stop laughing because my stomach is hurting.
00:41:22No more dirty knock-knock jokes for us.
00:41:25Is there more wine?
00:41:27Do you sure you want more?
00:41:30Yes.
00:41:32I guess I'm driving.
00:41:34That would be great.
00:41:36Does anyone else want more?
00:41:38What is that?
00:41:40Okay, big girl laugh.
00:42:02I told the entire auditorium I was bisexual during my campaign for student body president.
00:42:10What?
00:42:11And of course I lost.
00:42:13Oh my god, what?
00:42:15Yeah, thank you.
00:42:16I don't know why I thought the revelation would help my chances of being student body president in 2008 in Chatham, New York.
00:42:25Wow.
00:42:28I thought you were gay.
00:42:30No, bisexual, queer, both.
00:42:36Oliver, what are you?
00:42:38Oh, I'm queer.
00:42:40Everyone's queer.
00:42:42Except for Leo.
00:42:46I'm not straight.
00:42:48You're not?
00:42:49I'm queer.
00:42:52Didn't know that.
00:42:54Well, I'm just grateful to be able to live a genuine queer life, that part.
00:43:02Sometimes I wish I was queer.
00:43:04Oh, really?
00:43:06But you think maybe I'm queering heterosexuality, maybe?
00:43:16Maybe I am queer.
00:43:18Maybe you are.
00:43:20You would be the one to know.
00:43:22You all remember when we hooked up, Squirrel?
00:43:25Eleanor.
00:43:26Well, do you?
00:43:32Making out for less than a minute before you passed out, drunk.
00:43:35So what, it doesn't count?
00:43:39I guess it counts.
00:43:42I guess you're queer.
00:43:43See, I'm queer.
00:43:44I'm queer too, like why the fuck not?
00:43:47I just want to be like in the club.
00:43:50I want to get naked.
00:43:54Is she going to be okay?
00:43:57Yeah, she's going to be fine.
00:43:58Just a little too much day drinking.
00:44:01Need a little help in there.
00:44:02Yeah.
00:44:04Well, we should head out.
00:44:06Thanks again.
00:44:07Bye.
00:44:19Did you have fun?
00:44:21I did actually.
00:44:26Oliver's kind of a blowhard.
00:44:32I thought he was nice.
00:44:33I thought him and Joe were smart.
00:44:36Yeah, they talk about ideas.
00:44:42I have an idea.
00:44:45What is it?
00:44:50I forgot.
00:44:53Okay.
00:45:10Eleanor?
00:45:11You may enter.
00:45:18Are you all right?
00:45:20Never better.
00:45:23Anything I can do to help?
00:45:26Sit.
00:45:33Do you still like me?
00:45:35Of course I do.
00:45:37Because I was a terrible brute tonight, wasn't I?
00:45:41I still like you.
00:45:44Okay.
00:45:46That's good.
00:45:58I think I left my phone at their house.
00:46:04I'll pick it up in the morning.
00:47:04Morning.
00:47:15Morning.
00:47:17I have her phone.
00:47:18Thank God.
00:47:20Do you want some coffee?
00:47:23Oh.
00:47:24Sure.
00:47:25Okay.
00:47:32I'm not much of a hiking guy.
00:47:34No, you should definitely.
00:47:36I mean, the path is pretty clear on the property.
00:47:39You just have to, like, look out for the trail markers and you should be good.
00:47:44Are you sure?
00:47:45Yeah, I mean, we're leaving today, but I know Joe would be happy if you swung by for just a little hike.
00:47:51Maybe we will.
00:47:52I have to think of something to do with her.
00:47:56Oh, I'm sorry about yesterday.
00:47:58She's a lot.
00:48:01It's all good, really.
00:48:03I mean, she's maybe a little territorial.
00:48:07Territorial?
00:48:09Over you.
00:48:12Protective, too.
00:48:14Huh.
00:48:15I think in kind of a sweet way.
00:48:19If a little.
00:48:20A little.
00:48:21A little.
00:48:22Yeah.
00:48:23I just, yeah, I still am sorry for all the unhinged stuff she said.
00:48:27You know, I don't really mind her chaos.
00:48:30Oh, really?
00:48:31Well, then maybe you and I should switch places for the weekend because, oh, she's exhausting.
00:48:38Maybe that's why she's your friend.
00:48:41What?
00:48:43Maybe you like a little bit of dysfunction.
00:48:46Okay, um, former classmate and now my psychoanalyst.
00:48:52Um, for the record, I like simple.
00:48:55I, I like boring.
00:48:59That's, that's good.
00:49:03Is it?
00:49:05Yeah, because I'm boring.
00:49:10You absolutely are not.
00:49:14I don't want to.
00:49:18I'm usually a lot smoother than this.
00:49:22But, um, can I, can I kiss you?
00:49:27Me?
00:49:28Yeah, you.
00:49:31Are you and Joe?
00:49:33Oh, no, we're just friends.
00:49:44I've been wanting to do that since that terrible, terrible class.
00:49:50Really?
00:49:51Yeah, and I'm glad to know that you like boring because I'd very much like to do something boring with you sometime.
00:50:13Can I call you this week?
00:50:17I would really like that.
00:50:21Cool, me too.
00:50:23So you should stick around, enjoy the pool, hang out.
00:50:28I'm gonna head back up.
00:50:30We gotta head out soon.
00:50:32Yeah.
00:50:33Yeah?
00:50:34Yeah.
00:50:35All right.
00:50:36Have fun.
00:50:39Thanks for the coffee.
00:50:41Thanks for the kiss.
00:50:59You were gone for a while.
00:51:03I was getting your phone, remember?
00:51:05Ah, thank you, my hero.
00:51:11I got you a nice coffee from that place down the road. It's a little melted, though.
00:51:15I just had a coffee.
00:51:17But it's my peace offering.
00:51:29I'm sorry about last night.
00:51:32Apology accepted.
00:51:35But maybe, don't you think those guys are just like a tiny bit pretentious?
00:51:40Eleanor, seriously, you know you sound like Colton Colfield.
00:51:44Fine, fine.
00:51:46I am sorry for getting so drunk last night. I honestly don't remember much, but I'm sorry for whatever happened.
00:51:52Okay, thanks.
00:51:54Cheers.
00:52:05You have family in me.
00:52:08You have family in me.
00:52:10Family in me.
00:52:13Ready?
00:52:16Yep.
00:52:18What time is it?
00:52:19Time for our big hike.
00:52:23Okay.
00:52:30Are you okay? You seem weird.
00:52:33Just tired.
00:52:37Do you want to run lines when we get back?
00:52:39Oh, no. I mean...
00:52:42No, thank you.
00:52:44Appreciate it, though.
00:53:14I thought of a movie that changed history.
00:53:23Oh, yeah?
00:53:25The Thin Blue Line.
00:53:27Errol Morris literally solved a crime that exonerated an innocent man.
00:53:33Huh. Okay. What happened afterwards?
00:53:36He made a lot of money doing computer and beer commercials.
00:53:39The death row guy?
00:53:40Errol Morris.
00:53:42Right.
00:53:44Which way?
00:53:47This way.
00:53:49I don't see any trail markers.
00:53:52Trust me.
00:53:54Can we just stick to the trail?
00:54:00This is the trail, silly.
00:54:24Can we take a little break?
00:54:26Yeah.
00:54:30We're having fun, right?
00:54:32I never go on hikes.
00:54:34That's your whole problem.
00:54:37What?
00:54:38You have such a rigid view of yourself.
00:54:40You say you never go on hikes, but here you are going on a hike.
00:54:43You just don't try anything new unless someone pushes you to do it.
00:55:10You know, maybe what you think of as me being a coward...
00:55:15I never said you were a coward.
00:55:17...is actually me just having a little structure in my life because my whole life is a risk.
00:55:24And I don't need to, you know, act out like some theater kid just to prove a point.
00:55:31So everywhere I go is theater, right?
00:55:34Yep. Just without stage.
00:55:36I'm a photographer.
00:55:38Oh, right. And, uh, where's the camera?
00:55:41Why are you being such an asshole? If you don't want to keep hiking, then go back to the house.
00:55:45Why am I being an asshole?
00:55:47Go back to the house. Where the hell are we?
00:55:51I think we're lost.
00:55:53Yeah, no shit.
00:55:55No, we're, like, lost. Metaphorically lost.
00:56:00And actually lost.
00:56:05What are you doing?
00:56:06I'm going to navigate us out of here.
00:56:08Not just metaphorically.
00:56:12I don't have service, Steve.
00:56:14Don't worry about it.
00:56:16Can you check if you have service?
00:56:21Eleanor!
00:56:22What?
00:56:37I only have 3% battery.
00:56:39I think we're close.
00:56:41Oh, yeah, Eleanor, where are we?
00:56:43See? We're on the trail.
00:56:45Yeah, but do we even know if we're going in the right direction?
00:56:47It's a loop.
00:56:49Okay, my phone just died.
00:56:57Are you texting right now?
00:56:58No.
00:56:59If you are texting right now, then I'm texting.
00:57:03Are you texting right now?
00:57:04No.
00:57:05If you are texting Will with our source of light...
00:57:07I'm not texting Will. I haven't texted Will all weekend because I'm trying to be present with you.
00:57:12You haven't texted Will all weekend?
00:57:14Let's just try to get out of here, huh?
00:57:16So, you haven't texted him at all?
00:57:19No.
00:57:20No.
00:57:21No.
00:57:22Is that, like, normal for you guys?
00:57:24And weren't you just saying that you were texting him yesterday?
00:57:28Okay, busybody, we broke up, okay?
00:57:31What the fuck, Eleanor?
00:57:33So, you've just been lying to me all weekend?
00:57:35Well, you hide shit from me.
00:57:37You didn't want to take your shirt off and get in the water.
00:57:39Why? Because you didn't want me to know that you had neck top surgery, am I right?
00:57:42That is completely different, Eleanor.
00:57:44Oh, is it?
00:57:45You're so fucking clueless.
00:57:48I'm not clueless. You just don't clue me in.
00:57:52This isn't about me.
00:57:54This is about you lying to me all weekend.
00:57:56What do you want me to say?
00:57:58Tell me why you're not telling me shit.
00:58:01Okay.
00:58:05We were on the road trip for two days and I picked some stupid fight about directions and he just fucking left.
00:58:10Okay?
00:58:11He hitchhiked back home.
00:58:14I mean, why should I admit to you that I'm 29 fucking years old and I can't seem to keep a relationship for longer than three months?
00:58:22And you have your head so far up your own ass with your shitty little callback for your shitty little TV show
00:58:27and all you care about is impressing pretentious assholes that you don't even like.
00:58:31Wow. Eleanor, just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's shitty.
00:58:36What?
00:58:37It's not like we're in college anymore.
00:58:40I don't need to follow you around and just mirror back all your thoughts and opinion.
00:58:44Okay, that's not...
00:58:46I know I'm probably not supposed to say this because it's problematic or whatever
00:58:49because I'm not allowed to have any feelings about your transition, but I miss how things were.
00:58:55When you...
00:58:58Who you were before.
00:59:03You really aren't allowed to have feelings about that, like...
00:59:10At all.
00:59:13So fucked, Eleanor!
00:59:19I miss you.
00:59:22I just feel so distant from you now.
00:59:26It's not because I'm trans.
00:59:28It's really not.
00:59:33I don't know. I don't know what...
00:59:35I shouldn't be here.
00:59:37I shouldn't be in the fucking Tick-infested Blair Witch Woods fighting with you.
00:59:44Thank God.
00:59:45The house.
00:59:47Are you sure?
00:59:49Yes, I'm sure. Just tell me you didn't lose the car keys.
00:59:53I didn't.
00:59:59Leo.
01:00:01Leo!
01:00:03I love you.
01:00:06No, you don't, Eleanor.
01:00:10Kind of ironic, I guess.
01:00:13Acting as it was me, keeping secrets all those years, being in love with you.
01:00:18And you, pretending you didn't know.
01:00:21Although, I mean, you knew. You must have known.
01:00:26I didn't...
01:00:28Know.
01:00:31I mean, I didn't know...
01:00:33Know.
01:00:35You liked having me around as your little lapdog, and...
01:00:41I'm done.
01:00:43I am done.
01:00:46That's so unfair.
01:00:49Is it?
01:00:55Can you...
01:01:11Can you...
01:01:29I mean it.
01:01:31You have family in me.
01:01:35Fuck.
01:01:42Fuck.
01:01:50You okay?
01:01:52Yeah, just clumsy.
01:01:59Let me help.
01:02:03Fuck.
01:02:09Is it our last night?
01:02:13It is.
01:02:18You shouldn't be drinking alone.
01:02:24I heard you.
01:02:27Hmm?
01:02:29Like, I heard you. I was fucked up.
01:02:34But can I say something?
01:02:37Maybe less fucked up?
01:02:41Sure.
01:02:43I miss us.
01:02:46You miss us?
01:02:49I miss us.
01:02:51You miss us?
01:02:53You're the best friend I've ever had.
01:02:56Like, my best, best friend.
01:03:00And I feel like...
01:03:04You haven't been acting that way, or something.
01:03:10Or like you were my best friend, and now you're just...
01:03:15Someone else?
01:03:18I don't know.
01:03:21I'm still me, Eleanor.
01:03:25Definitely still me.
01:03:29That's good.
01:03:31Maybe it's just...
01:03:35I wish I weren't still me.
01:03:39Maybe if you just accepted you a little more, it would help.
01:03:44I mean, I always liked you as you are.
01:03:51It's like when you're not happy being you, that you become a little bit too much of you, or something.
01:03:59Yeah.
01:04:01I liked following you around in college.
01:04:06You led me out of the hole I was in.
01:04:10And you still do.
01:04:26Eleanor, I think you're confused.
01:04:35I am confused.
01:04:39By you.
01:04:43Okay.
01:04:45You are...
01:04:47Something.
01:05:17Okay.
01:05:47Okay.
01:06:17Okay.
01:06:47Are you...
01:06:55No, yeah.
01:06:56Okay.
01:07:05Could you maybe, um, a little to the left?
01:07:10Sure.
01:07:12Yeah.
01:07:23My hand's cramping.
01:07:25Oh, um, that should be...
01:07:27Maybe if, um...
01:07:29Yeah.
01:07:40Okay.
01:08:08Did you just fake it?
01:08:12No.
01:08:17Yes.
01:08:20Okay.
01:08:29I guess I should probably go.
01:08:34Yeah.
01:08:44Eleanor.
01:08:53Oh my god, Leo, I'm so sorry.
01:08:58That was so horrifying.
01:09:02Have you ever had worse sex?
01:09:04No, even the first time wasn't this bad.
01:09:12At least it was brief.
01:09:17And now we know.
01:09:18We really know.
01:09:19And it will never happen again.
01:09:21Unless we're stuck in a cave or on a deserted island.
01:09:24Or on a long cruise ship trip.
01:09:27Or if they make another Avengers movie that's three hours long and we're stuck in the last row.
01:09:31We run out of popcorn.
01:09:41So, I didn't ruin everything?
01:09:47No.
01:09:52I just...
01:09:55I did the thing where I sabotage a good thing.
01:10:03And I've just been driving around for the past couple weeks aiming my camera aimlessly at shit and not pressing the shutter.
01:10:11And you have a whole life that I know nothing about.
01:10:16And I know it's not your fault.
01:10:21I am a little clueless.
01:10:24But I'm learning, right?
01:10:26We're all learning.
01:10:37You want to know something weird?
01:10:40Another secret?
01:10:43Kind of.
01:10:47You know how much of a loser I feel like I am?
01:10:50You're not a loser.
01:10:52No, don't try to make me feel better.
01:10:54But here's the thing.
01:10:59I'm a fucking good teacher.
01:11:04Like I'm bizarrely good at it.
01:11:07And my whole life plan was like, no, I'm an artist.
01:11:12And I was somehow embarrassed that I became a high school teacher.
01:11:17But I admit it.
01:11:21I fucking love my job.
01:11:31That's awesome.
01:11:33Pays shit.
01:11:34Yeah.
01:11:36It's exhausting.
01:11:38The principal's a scumbag.
01:11:40That sucks.
01:11:41Did I mention the pay?
01:11:42Shit.
01:11:43You did.
01:11:49I'm so sorry for blowing everything up.
01:11:52I'm sorry too.
01:11:59Why do you care so much?
01:12:05Because.
01:12:08Because you're my family, Raya.
01:12:11Right.
01:12:12Family.
01:12:17I don't have any family.
01:12:20I mean it.
01:12:24You have family in me.
01:12:27Just because you refuse to see it doesn't mean it's not true.
01:12:33You don't have to be blood to be family.
01:12:38Our bond is deeper than biology.
01:12:45Whether you like it or not, we're irrevocably connected.
01:12:50Ever since that day at the crash pad, we've been linked.
01:12:55You're not perfect.
01:12:58Neither am I.
01:13:01But we're perfect in our imperfection.
01:13:07Two warped puzzle pieces that managed to fit just right.
01:13:16You fit me.
01:13:19And I fit you.
01:13:21So.
01:13:24Yeah, Raya.
01:13:27You have family.
01:13:30I may not be those people in that church, but you have family standing right in front of you.
01:13:41I was wrong.
01:13:43That's how you should do it.
01:13:45Gentle.
01:13:50You're really good, Leo.
01:14:24You're welcome.
01:14:54You're welcome.
01:15:24You're welcome.
01:15:54You're welcome.
01:16:24I wouldn't want it any other way.
01:16:39There's not much I could say.
01:16:43A lot of things have changed.
01:16:47It isn't quite the same.
01:16:53I thought about you every night and day.
01:16:59Now talking's pretty strange.
01:17:03We're on a different page.
01:17:08It's healthier this way.
01:17:12But when I look at you, I see an old friend.
01:17:17I see an old friend passing through.
01:17:21And when I think of you, I want to be friends.
01:17:25I want to be friends with you.
01:17:32With you.
01:17:47Will you marry me?