This gynaecologist suffered from vaginismus for seven years and healed herself in less than four weeks. Now, she’s helping hundreds of other women like her.
🎥 : Proactive For Her
🎥 : Proactive For Her
Category
🛠️
LifestyleTranscript
00:00they heard from somewhere that sex always hurts the first time and with time it improves and we
00:06want to bust that myth vaginismus is not an issue of the structure of the vagina it's not because
00:12of the hymen it's not because of the space i'm a gynecologist married to a psychiatrist the very
00:17two professions that actually deal with vaginismus yet we had vaginismus for seven years after marriage
00:24vaginismus or vaginismus means difficulty in allowing vaginal penetration of anything it
00:34could be a finger when you're trying to put a tampon or a cup it could be a gynecologist finger
00:40it could be an instrument or it could be a penis during a sexual situation even though you really
00:46really want to do it we don't have a vocabulary around this condition and hence it takes a lot
00:51of time for her to even start speaking about it there's a lot of delay in you know her receiving
00:56treatment and she even realizing what she has this girl goes into a sense of you know silence
01:02and withdraws from the society because she starts to feel that she's defective in some way she's
01:08inadequate in some way because we are all taught to believe this is one of our main
01:12role as a woman right in our society and if we can't do that then who are we
01:21a lot of times there is a misconception that vaginismus is because there is something wrong
01:26with the vagina and that's not true vaginismus is not an issue of the structure of the vagina
01:31it's not because of the hymen it's not because of the space but the issue is the muscles around the
01:36vagina are contracting or they're spasming or tightening whenever there is an attempt to
01:42penetrate the vagina that's simply because your mind perceives penetration as a threat and hence
01:48when something comes close to the vagina your mind sends a signal to the vaginal muscles to close the
01:54door this is simply a protective response or a protective reflex of your body just as if we
02:00touch something hot automatically as a reflex response your hands will withdraw this is not
02:06something you do this is something that happens spontaneously
02:12maximum women got vaginismus in our program because they heard from somewhere that sex
02:19always hurts the first time and with time it improves and we want to bust that myth
02:24your vagina will also undergo an erection provided you are aroused just as a guy cannot
02:30penetrate without erection why should you penetrate without an erection so but when a woman gets an
02:35erection this three to four inches balloons out to a five to six inch barrel this is the design
02:41of painless pleasurable intercourse that every woman deserves to have a lot of people feel
02:48vaginismus is because of the hymen obstructing the penis from going in and this is far from the
02:55truth in fact a lot of people are advised hymen surgeries to open the hymen so that vaginismus
03:02just opening the hymen is not going to help the issue here is your muscle contracting that's
03:08because of an unscientific approach at vaginismus we are just treating the vagina we are not looking
03:14at the mind the myth that is very prevalent is sex is not for women sex is for men and women are
03:21tools of pleasure it's a duty just as cooking childbearing all these are your duties providing
03:28sex is your duty and that's why a lot of shame is heaped on to women because you're not providing
03:33sex the head of the clitoris is a 300 times more sensitive than the head of the penis we used shame
03:40to just hide the clitoris from the conversation in medical textbooks in schools conversations in
03:48sex education if this is the apparatus that a woman is given then isn't it for her to enjoy
03:58i'm a gynecologist married to a psychiatrist the very two professions that actually deal with
04:03vaginismus yet we had vaginismus for seven years after marriage we were in a very bad space and
04:10that's when i really thought that i will really have to treat this myself and thanks to some
04:15literature review i did at that time i sat down and created some sort of a structure to heal
04:21and i healed in less than four weeks
04:26the first step is obviously doing a deep dive into her past and trying to fetch out those reasons
04:34why she got vaginismus in the first place because let's realize the root is in the mind so we start
04:40working with some kind of emotional healing the first step also includes just helping her sit
04:46with her body help her literally look at her whole body and her vulva and trying to
04:50try to embrace it trying to accept what she has and try to actually find beauty in that
04:56some amount of emotional healing has happened we start with something called as vaginal training
05:01training your mind and your vaginal muscles to relax in presence of an external object at the
05:08vagina instead of starting directly with the penis we first start with something called as
05:12vaginal trainers which are also called as vaginal dilators they are of graduated sizes
05:18are going up to a size that is as big as an erect penis make it a very gentle process by teaching
05:23her a lot of relaxation techniques techniques to make this a pain-free process we also include
05:30pleasure in this because our whole goal here is not just to have painless penetration but also to
05:36make it pleasurable and we move on to the third step wherein the partner starts to get involved
05:42with her in case she has a partner in which we start to kind of first build a lot of emotional
05:47intimacy then we go into sensate focus and partner dilation the last step is of course
05:53vaginal penetration take it in a very trauma sensitive in a very gentle way and ensuring
05:59that the whole process is painless pleasurable and and she feels supported