Bronwen is a mental health worker, online counsellor and real estate agent who lives in Toronto, Canada. She is preparing to marry her first love, who is serving life in prison. Bronwen met her future husband when she was just 17 years old. Her best friend at the time persuaded Bronwen to accompany her to prison while she went to visit her boyfriend. There, while her friend spoke with her partner, Bronwen was introduced to Justin. After resisting his initial advances Bronwen eventually fell in love with him over six months through letters, calls and visits. They stayed together through her early 20s, but eventually lost touch as Bronwen continued to live her life in the outside world. But years later, after experiencing a series of bad relationships, she decided she wanted to find Justin again. With some online digging and reaching out to other inmates within the prison system she eventually found out where he was 12 and a half years after they first met. Bronwen reached out to him and nervously awaited a response. He wrote a letter to her two months later giving her his number, she called him and they were engaged in just two weeks. They have never spent a night together, despite knowing each other for 21 years. "I am marrying a man serving life", she said. "I'm having my honeymoon behind bars." Bronwen has tried her best to arrange the most romantic wedding possible to marry the love of her life, but she admits that: "You're limited to what you can do in a maximum penitentiary." In this episode, she shows Love Don't Judge the dress she intends to wear to get married. "This would be my wedding dress that I'll be wearing at the prison. I still don't even know if I can wear it because I don't know if there's 'no shoulders allowed'." She estimates that she has spent up to $6000 on the wedding day, which will have a cake, flowers and only two guests in attendance. "If anybody thinks this is a waste of money, I'm not trying to be rude, but it's my money, not yours", she said. Although she is excited for the ceremony she lamented the circumstances in which they are exchanging vows. "The worst thing about it is that we're not free. We're in a jail. It feels like a dark and gloomy place to have a celebration." In the hopes of inspiring others to see past the prejudice many prison relationships receive, Bronwen started posting about their love online. However, some commenters have criticised her relationship with harsh words. "He's in prison. If he's not loyal, he's playing on the other team. Embarrassing. You're crazy. You have mental issues. Seek help."
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00:00So this will be my wedding dress that I'll be wearing at the prison.
00:02I still don't even know if I can wear it because I don't know if there's no shoulders allowed.
00:05Hi, I'm Bronwyn and I am marrying a man serving life.
00:08This is his ring that he designed and there's an engravement on the inside that says forever yours.
00:14I'm having my honeymoon behind bars.
00:16We need a good lawyer.
00:17Some comments that I get are pretty hateful.
00:19He's in prison. If he's not loyal then he's playing on the other team.
00:22Embarrassing.
00:23Seek help.
00:24I've always felt that they should wait to get married.
00:27He could stay in for the rest of his life.
00:29There's no set date for his release.
00:32The worst thing about it is that we're not free.
00:35We are in a jail.
00:36It's just a dark and gloomy place to have a celebration.
00:41You're limited to what you can do in a maximum penitentiary.
00:44We have flowers and my wedding dress.
00:47I've probably spent around $5,000 to $6,000 on our wedding.
00:51So I bought this car for my husband because I want him to be mobile when he comes home.
00:56I'm hoping that Justin can get out as soon as possible to drive it.
00:59Hopefully within two to three, max four years.
01:02I can't wait till we roll up to Functions together in our his and hers Benzes.
01:07If anybody thinks this is a waste of money, I'm not trying to be rude, but it's my money, not yours.
01:12I met Justin through a mutual friend in 2003.
01:17I was asked by my best friend to accompany her to visit one of her boyfriends back in the day in jail.
01:24And I said, I don't want to have anything to do with that.
01:26She did some convincing.
01:27I agreed and then I went there and the rest was history.
01:32He was always very polite.
01:33He was trying to get my number and I was saying no, I was refusing all of his advances.
01:39In his mind, he says that this was the girl I want to marry.
01:41I think I just turned 18.
01:43I didn't have any interest to be dating someone that was, you know, charged with a criminal offense.
01:49So when we left the visit, I was kind of like happy that we left.
01:53I was like, oh, thank God that's over with.
01:55He kept calling and calling and calling.
01:56And then one day I just gave in and I'm like, great, like this is annoying.
02:00I'll talk to you.
02:01And then he started to ask if he could write me letters and I agreed.
02:05So it took him about six months to actually win my heart.
02:09And then like I almost immediately fell in love with him.
02:13We stayed together for a few years.
02:15However, we didn't get to see each other a lot and we just eventually lost contact.
02:20Years later, I was like, well, I wonder what Justin's doing because this relationship kind of sucks that I'm in.
02:27And I'm like, that guy was really nice to me.
02:29I wonder where he is.
02:30Twelve and a half years, we had no contact.
02:32It's very hard to find somebody in prison, especially when you don't know where they are.
02:36And I started talking to this inmate to try to find out where my husband was.
02:41One day he called me and he's like, oh, I know where your ex is.
02:45And he's like, and he's single.
02:46I'm like, I'll call you back.
02:48Click, wrote him a letter right away.
02:50So two months went by.
02:51I opened the mailbox and I was so shocked.
02:55But there was a letter from him.
02:56I called him right away.
02:57And boom, we got engaged two weeks later.
03:00We have a wedding registry on our Instagram and our TikTok.
03:03We started to receive some gifts.
03:05Some of the silly little things I asked for, like some lashes.
03:09We need these clear bottles when I take stuff into the prison, like shampoo and things like that.
03:13Unfortunately, we can't play music.
03:15We can't have any banners or any crazy fireworks or anything like that.
03:20So today I'm going to be doing a TikTok live and I'm going to read some of the comments to you guys.
03:24How do you get married in prison?
03:26It's a big process, but basically you have to get approved by the warden and several other people from the institution.
03:33I almost went to jail for evading millions in taxes, but my amazing lawyers got my charges dropped.
03:38That's amazing.
03:39Can you drop his name in the comments because we need a good lawyer.
03:42You're amazing.
03:43Let's go strong like this.
03:44I love all you guys.
03:45You guys, again, are my strength.
03:47Some of these comments that I get from people on TikTok or Instagram social media are pretty hateful.
03:52So one in particular, he's in prison.
03:54If he's not loyal, then he's playing on the other team.
03:57I think it's trauma.
03:58It's a fantasy, not reality.
03:59But if that works for you, then hey.
04:01Oh, you poor thing.
04:02I hope you didn't regret the time you've invested in this relationship.
04:05I've responded to a lot of these on my TikTok.
04:08I really want to tell them my genuine answer and see if they can see it from my side.
04:12Sometimes I do turn their opinions around.
04:14Your whole Instagram personality is someone proud for dating a jailbird that can't even support his family because he's behind walls.
04:20Embarrassing.
04:22You need a real man.
04:23I always get comments saying, what can he do for you?
04:27What's wrong with you?
04:28Seek help.
04:29There's a lot of people that ask me to hook them up with prisoners.
04:32They're not all built the same.
04:34On the other hand, I feel like the love that me and Justin has is a very healthy, real, non-toxic love that does deserve to be shared because that kind of love doesn't exist anymore.
04:44I don't want young girls to go and be with men in prison just because they think everybody's like Justin.
04:50Everybody's not like Justin.
04:51I promise you that.
04:52I've been there.
04:54So babe, how are you feeling?
04:56I know our wedding's coming up.
04:58I'll tell you, I'm like excited more than anything, right?
05:02Everything that I said to you 21 years ago is coming to fruition now.
05:07I'm excited that finally we're going to get to be together.
05:11Finally.
05:12I'm a little overwhelmed because I am doing this all on my own, but this is a dream come true.
05:18I feel like I'm in a fairy tale and I just can't wait.
05:21You know, you're smart and you're funny and you just are the person that I know I was meant to be with and I never let go of that.
05:30We're so corny.
05:31Because you love me so much, you know.
05:33I think the judgment that would be most unfair is like, what can a guy in my position have to offer you?
05:42I think people unfairly judge me for that because it's not all about material, right?
05:47Right, and it's so hard to explain that to people who've never really been in love because your love is worth your weight in gold.
05:54You know what I mean?
05:55I would still be with you over somebody with money that doesn't treat me properly.
05:59How long we've known each other.
06:00We've never spent the night alone together.
06:03Nope.
06:03So much, man.
06:04Like, it's crazy.
06:06It is.
06:06Really, really is.
06:07It shows the strength of our relationship, right?
06:10Sucks.
06:11They just told me again right now, so I gotta go right now.
06:13All right, I love you.
06:14Okay.
06:15I'll talk to you later.
06:17Yeah, see, that's what sucks is that a call could just end just like that, abruptly.
06:23So that's some of the consequences of being in a relationship in prison.
06:27So I'm only allowed to have two guests at my wedding, and one of them is going to be TJ.
06:31She's coming over really soon, and I'm going to ask her to be my bridesmaid.
06:35I've kind of always felt that they should wait to get married until, you know, Justin comes home,
06:40and they can have, you know, the proper wedding that they both deserve.
06:44You know, your wedding day is supposed to be the most beautiful day of your life,
06:47and I just feel that it being in jail for both of them is just very limited.
06:52So can I expect an open bar, you know?
06:54Are we going to have dancing?
06:55How is this supposed to look?
06:57Oh my god, I would—
06:58Take this picture for me.
07:00I would be the first person to have the open bar at the wedding, but we can't have any alcohol.
07:05We can't have—I mean, we can dance if we want to, but I don't know if there's going to be music.
07:09Maybe the guard will be nice and put on his cell phone for us.
07:12I don't know, but it's going to kind of be like, you know, just a very, you know,
07:17just close few people together eating some cake and just, you know, giving each other hugs and making some laughs.
07:24What's the honeymoon is going to look like?
07:26What do you guys have planned?
07:27Well, we get our own house, which is good.
07:29It's connected to, like, there's other inmates staying.
07:31I'm going to just get to see him behind the scenes instead of guards behind him
07:35and instead of kids screaming in a visiting room.
07:37So we're just going to enjoy every single day as much as we can.
07:42So I want to thank you for changing my brother's life.
07:45You have sparked that motivation and drive to come home,
07:48and he's going to have a good home to come home to.
07:51Thank you, TJ.
07:53I'm so glad I get to be a part of your guys' family.
07:55You have no idea.
07:57So, TJ, I don't know how this is going to work because it's a prison wedding,
08:00but Justin wanted me to ask you, we've been wanting to ask you for a long time,
08:03if you will be my maid of honor.
08:08Yes, I would love that.
08:09I would love to do that for you.
08:11Absolutely.
08:11Thank you so much.
08:15Oh my God, I feel so blessed.
08:17I think this relationship works because we have a history.
08:20We trust each other.
08:21We both have this deep understanding for each other.
08:25It's just all love.
08:26It's literally what you see in movies.
08:29If you think that's fake, it's not.
08:30It's out there.
08:31I know for sure that this is what real love is.