To Say Goodbye Full Movie
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00You
00:00:30You
00:01:00You
00:01:30I
00:01:48Love you
00:02:01Oh
00:02:05Come here baby, what's going on? I just came to tell you how much I love you
00:02:12Okay
00:02:14Thank you
00:02:15Good night
00:02:18See you in the morning
00:02:20I
00:02:50Love you
00:03:20You
00:03:50You
00:03:57Do you know why
00:04:06Daddy
00:04:10Baby
00:04:13You having fun with up Vanessa and uncle Scott I
00:04:17Want to go home with you
00:04:20No, baby
00:04:23Can you go play for a minute
00:04:39Can you guys take them tonight, where are you going? Oh
00:04:44Oh
00:04:48Do you think that's a good idea I need some time
00:04:56Yeah, I guess
00:05:13You
00:05:43You
00:06:13You
00:06:43Once upon a time there was a monster
00:06:49Lauren tell mama what kind of monster was a tickle monster. That's right
00:06:55This tickle monster loved to tickle he couldn't get enough
00:07:06But the tickle monster had one weakness
00:07:11The Lauren tell mama what that was
00:07:15Hug from a snuggle bug is the only thing that could keep a tickle monster at bay
00:07:23So one day the tickle oh
00:07:27No, oh no, I can't something's coming out. I can't stop it
00:07:40I
00:08:10I
00:08:15Don't know if you guys heard but that took her own life over the weekend
00:08:22So
00:08:23obviously will
00:08:25They'll be out for a while
00:08:27We got a lot of work ahead of us. We got to keep our focus. Okay
00:08:31Construction will go on as normal
00:08:35All right, I'll see you over there
00:08:37Hey
00:08:40What I miss
00:08:4320 minutes late Ken
00:08:45Yeah, yeah, I'm really sorry about that
00:08:49Ken wills dealing with some family issues right now and we're gonna be short-staffed. I need you here. Oh
00:08:58Yeah, of course I'll do my best
00:09:01This is your last warning next time I'll have to let you go and I really don't want to do that
00:09:10Thanks, all right
00:09:26I have a few questions for you
00:09:29I have a few questions for you
00:09:32Seems everyone does
00:09:34Do you know where you'll be holding the ceremony?
00:09:37Grace Church
00:09:39Will you be having an open casket? I?
00:09:42Guess I hadn't thought about that
00:09:45What were her final wishes?
00:09:58I just need you to fill out this form here
00:10:16I don't really know how to answer some of these questions. We never talked about cremation or open casket
00:10:29Oh
00:10:38You missed a line I
00:10:44Don't know what it should say. Well, most people just talk about their loved ones. How do you want her to be remembered?
00:10:51She
00:10:56Killed herself Jill. I don't feel like I ever really knew her
00:11:15All I can say is she was not feeling God's true love without that she felt
00:11:21Hopeless and alone, but she wasn't alone
00:11:25She had a family
00:11:27Most people commit suicide aren't alone. They just start painting this picture in their mind that killing themselves is the only way out
00:11:36I'll be here for you. Well, whatever you need
00:11:40But I want to refer you to someone someone I regard very highly
00:11:46You want to send me to someone else?
00:11:48Dr. Emma Walker
00:11:51she specializes in suicide and
00:11:54Leads meetings here at the church once a month
00:11:59Next to Jesus she'll be your best resource
00:12:18Thanks, babe, okay
00:12:23You ready I hope so. What do you think? What do you think look good?
00:12:30He's gonna kill me he's gonna kill me
00:12:48Took you so long your sister. Good luck kiss things. I put up with her
00:13:00And I couldn't believe what he said after that it was you should have been there dude
00:13:08Mr. Johnson
00:13:12Mr. Johnson, hello
00:13:15He's not here he'll be here I wouldn't put it past him not to show up
00:13:23Good morning, mr. Johnson
00:13:28Jobs yours
00:13:30Wow, just don't make me regret this got it. Well, no, of course because if you do
00:13:36I'll make sure that you never work in this town again. Got it
00:13:40I'm sorry. I'm sorry my apologies. Sorry
00:13:45I call Margaret in the morning. She'll get everything finalized
00:13:54Thank you
00:13:58Well, isn't he just a field of daisies on a bright sunny day doesn't matter what he is
00:14:04He just gave us the biggest project of our lives
00:14:08We got the job we got the job we got the job
00:14:14Whoo
00:14:45I
00:14:47Girls are finally asleep
00:14:51How are you doing no
00:14:58We'll get through this
00:15:05Don't see how there's no light at the end of the tunnel for this one
00:15:11Girls are never gonna have their mom
00:15:16Will is never gonna have a normal relationship again
00:15:25Nothing's ever gonna be the same
00:15:30I loved her Scott. She was my best friend
00:15:40I
00:16:11I was here. Okay. I
00:16:19Don't know
00:16:24You think I should go over there and talk to him
00:16:30No, I don't want to smother him I
00:16:38Hate that Beth did this
00:16:40I hate this
00:16:51I'll go talk to him, okay
00:17:10I
00:17:28Want to be the first to say congrats on the big job
00:17:31I know Mike hasn't made it official yet, but he will you are an amazing man, and I know he will see that
00:17:40I
00:17:44Why would she say that
00:17:52Well, what happened
00:17:56She said she loved me
00:17:59She said she was proud of me
00:18:04Why would she want to kill herself
00:18:07What caused her to change so drastically
00:18:14Did I do something wrong
00:18:17Did she do something wrong I
00:18:24Don't know I
00:18:29Don't think there are any solid answers right now
00:18:37But you and I
00:18:43We we both know she loved you and the girls loved us
00:18:50She loved us enough to leave us
00:18:55You know, it seems
00:18:58Like she hated her life with us so much that she decided to kill herself. That's not love
00:19:06That's not love
00:19:36You
00:20:06You
00:20:36You
00:21:06I
00:21:25Would you do this to me? How could you let this happen?
00:21:37I
00:21:40Always did what's right?
00:22:06Oh
00:22:17Where's mom
00:22:19She left
00:22:22Where did she go? I'm not sure
00:22:29When did she leave last night
00:22:36I
00:23:06I
00:23:36I
00:24:06You
00:24:36You
00:24:46What are you doing? Well, what are you doing? Huh?
00:24:58You got two little girls at home
00:25:01How could you even be thinking about doing something like this? I wasn't trying to kill myself
00:25:07What I wasn't trying to kill myself I
00:25:11Needed to know how she felt. I
00:25:17Don't know what to do I
00:25:22Should not have let her go to bed without asking what was wrong. I should have talked to her
00:25:34We were dancing
00:25:37There's something there I
00:25:41Could see it I
00:25:43Just let it go
00:25:48Will you you couldn't have known but I should have Scott I was her husband. I
00:25:57Mean
00:25:58There had to have been signs. There was at least one and
00:26:02I didn't do anything about it. Not a thing
00:26:09This
00:26:12This does not just fall on your shoulders
00:26:16And her her choice
00:26:20To end her life
00:26:23You couldn't have prevented that it's not your fault or anyone else's
00:26:31I
00:27:01You
00:27:31You
00:28:01Oh
00:28:28Feel better now. Yep
00:28:32Well, where are you going to get some help
00:28:54Lauren don't hate that. It's okay. Mama says the black makes my teeth whiter
00:29:01I
00:29:24Brought you some lunch. I already told you I'm not hungry
00:29:28You really should try to eat something
00:29:34I'll just put it here in case you do get hungry
00:29:54Thanks
00:29:58You
00:30:11All right, that's all of it
00:30:16What is this everything they say you need to know about suicide
00:30:23Now take the entire stack and throw it in the trash
00:30:26You want me to throw it away that's right
00:30:39Why did I just do that?
00:30:41Because the brochure can't even come close to telling you what to feel or how to really deal with the suicide
00:30:47And you can I?
00:30:50Believe the families of suicide victims need to go through three steps, but we'll get to that later first
00:30:56I usually have my patients start by spilling their guts
00:31:01Spill my guts
00:31:03Right now inside of you. There are
00:31:05tons of feelings swirling around anger sadness
00:31:10Frustration denial hopelessness and all of those feelings are completely understandable
00:31:15I'm here to help you get them out and sort through them
00:31:20How are you gonna help me go through that what are you 22, I'm 28
00:31:28Isn't that a little young to be a therapist actually it's not
00:31:32But I was too young when my brother killed himself. I
00:31:37Was 10 and
00:31:40when
00:31:41My parents couldn't handle it. My dad killed himself
00:31:44when I was 12
00:31:47And then finally my mom killed herself when I was 16 I
00:31:54Was the one that found them every time it was me I
00:31:59Couldn't figure out why my family would want to leave me all alone. I figured there must be something wrong with me
00:32:06That's why I started to study psychology
00:32:08I figured if I could understand how the mind works how people work I could figure out
00:32:15What I did wrong and why my family did it
00:32:21So what's wrong with us nothing nothing's wrong with us
00:32:26People who commit suicide are not thinking right they've painted a drastically false image of what their life is they can't see
00:32:33Anything positive finally they choose the most absolute action possible for a very temporary situation
00:32:41How did you get over it
00:32:43You don't get over it you get through you move on with your life
00:32:48I've just I've come to the point where there are some things. I'll never understand
00:32:56So you don't know why they committed suicide
00:33:02That's what I don't get you know the day before she
00:33:07Committed suicide
00:33:12We all had the best time ever
00:33:17Everything was perfect
00:33:23Now I have to step in and play mom which I wanted
00:33:29Not like this have you and Scott had the whole kid marriage talk yet I
00:33:35I
00:33:36drop hints
00:33:39Maybe he's just not ready Vanessa. He's a man. It's don't work sit him down and make him talk
00:33:56Why haven't you asked her
00:34:00She says no
00:34:03You already bought her the ring why would she say no ask her?
00:34:25Morning mr. Johnson I heard about your wife
00:34:29Yeah, it's been rough
00:34:33One misstep and you're out of here got it
00:34:38What I
00:34:40Don't know what was going on at home
00:34:42But it's not gonna fly around here
00:34:45Nothing was going on at home
00:34:48People don't just kill themselves
00:34:52You implying that I had something to do we're done here
00:35:00I
00:35:17Just accused me of killing my wife
00:35:21Who Mike
00:35:23He said you killed Beth. He implied that had caused her to commit suicide
00:35:29I
00:35:34Look well you should take the rest of the day off work
00:35:38You know you're right I need to go clear my head hey, hey
00:35:43Are you gonna be okay fine?
00:35:59You feeling better
00:36:09It's been up and down
00:36:19I think it's time Sadie goes back to school. It's only been a week. I think it'd be good for her
00:36:29Anything's better than her just lying in bed I
00:36:35Talked to the school counselor, and she thinks she can help I
00:36:47Have no idea what I'm doing I
00:36:52Don't have the slightest idea how to raise two little girls on my own
00:37:00It's gotten I've been talking I
00:37:06Know
00:37:08That did all the books for the company
00:37:11We were thinking that
00:37:14We were thinking that maybe I could quit my job
00:37:18So I could do the books and help you with the girls
00:37:23But you love your job, I love you and the girls more
00:37:29Well
00:37:33You and Scott have been so great
00:37:38Thank you for everything
00:37:50So what do you think about going back to school tomorrow, whatever
00:37:59If you're ready sure
00:38:03Are you sure
00:38:06Yes, I'm sure I'm sure I'm ready to go to school
00:38:13Daddy yeah, can you do my hair like mom did for school?
00:38:18Um
00:38:25Well, I could I'm sure sweetie look at you all dolled up
00:38:34Won't be as good as mom's
00:38:42Thank You Vanessa
00:38:45Oh
00:38:47Yeah, honey, will I ever be as pretty as you
00:38:52Gosh yes, when I was your age, I looked a lot like
00:38:58But
00:39:08I would be prettier if I had some lip gloss and maybe some eye shadow
00:39:15You know what?
00:39:17You're right
00:39:23She's a bit young to be wearing makeup isn't she
00:39:27Daddy might think so but a lady is never too young to look stunning. I don't think I need makeup. Oh, yeah
00:39:34Yeah, I'm thinking I'll wait
00:39:37Three to six years probably you just made your father a very happy man. Well, we're in here
00:39:45We
00:39:56Got it
00:40:05So uncle Scott and I were thinking that maybe we could celebrate yeah at the waterpark, yeah
00:40:16Wait a minute
00:40:21What is this mom put makeup on Lauren
00:40:25She didn't I'm so beautiful
00:40:29So beautiful, uh, perhaps a little too beautiful. Don't worry daddy. Sadie's waiting. How long?
00:40:35Three to six years before she even thinks about wearing makeup. That's my girl
00:40:42But a lady is never too young
00:40:45to smell good
00:41:07You are an amazingly strong little girl
00:41:11But it's okay to be sad
00:41:15I'm sad. I miss mama every day
00:41:28I'm gonna be city
00:41:46Are you excited to see your friends? Yep
00:42:02You know
00:42:04If you're not ready to do this you can change your mind you can stay home as long as you want it's really okay
00:42:12Look I appreciate you trying to be extra nice because mom killed herself, but I'll be fine
00:42:31I love you. I
00:42:34Don't know what to do
00:42:36In the last two weeks, I've lost everything
00:42:38Everything what's left of my family continues to fall apart
00:42:45If this is the way life is gonna be
00:42:49Maybe Beth had the right idea stop it
00:42:52That's how it starts you put that thought on the table and after time passes
00:42:56It'll begin to look better and you'll have the courage to actually kill yourself
00:43:00You'll be strong enough or weak enough to abandon your little girls
00:43:05You give yourself one option
00:43:08You pick your feet up and take one step at a time
00:43:12Giving up is not an option
00:43:14You push forward every day and the days that you don't want to you do it for yourself you do it for Sadie and for
00:43:19Lauren
00:43:23You are fully responsible for keeping yourself alive I
00:43:29Think you should attend my survivors group tonight
00:43:32It might help you to see things differently
00:43:34Isn't that where people go to talk about how hard their lives are it's where people can share their struggles so others know they're not alone
00:43:41I
00:43:43Don't want anybody to know how I feel
00:43:45Do you feel alone?
00:43:49Yes
00:43:51Are you
00:43:56No, who do you have that cares about you
00:44:01Vanessa Scott
00:44:04Sadie Lauren
00:44:08No one is alone unless they choose to be
00:44:12Do you think Beth felt alone I don't know yes you do I
00:44:23Guess maybe she did
00:44:25What do you think would have happened if Beth knew that others felt the way she did what if she would have opened up
00:44:34She might still be here
00:44:41Look what I got you
00:44:55Thanks, you're welcome
00:44:57How's the shot it's not the same without you I miss you I miss you, too
00:45:04Listen if there's anything I can do to help us say to your Lauren I can be free anytime
00:45:10It's not Lauren I'm worried about it's
00:45:28You
00:45:32Lady
00:45:42I'm so sorry. I'm late
00:45:49How was school it was great what happened
00:45:53Some kids were talking about how great their parents are
00:45:57So I threw my milk at them
00:46:01Sadie
00:46:02Don't worry principal really let me off my shrink said it's typical for kids to get angry after someone dies
00:46:10which
00:46:11Basically means I can get away with anything I want right now
00:46:18You know that
00:46:20Me and your dad and uncle Scott are here if you want to talk
00:46:25Why does everyone insist that I talk I don't want to talk I just wish you'd leave me alone
00:46:44My husband's business wasn't doing very well, but he seemed fine. I went into work one day to do the books and
00:46:52I opened the door and there he was my mother has battled depression for years
00:46:59She'd tried committing suicide several times my name is Ken
00:47:05I've been coming to this group for a while now
00:47:09My wife killed herself 12 years ago. It was just before Christmas
00:47:14She was in a depressed state
00:47:17And she overdosed hanging there
00:47:21He must have been there for hours. She put the barrel of my shotgun in her mouth
00:47:29My son found her rather than passing away
00:47:33She became delirious and wandered outside
00:47:35He was cold and stiff
00:47:38you never get over that kind of thing you just
00:47:42Try to move forward she walked for hours before someone finally found her
00:47:47She
00:47:49Suffered severe frostbite on every exposed surface. He was ghostly white
00:47:56Except for the purple ring around his neck she wasn't wearing shoes
00:48:03Both of her feet were amputated
00:48:06And I've been trying
00:48:11But
00:48:14My son has
00:48:16Attempted suicide three times
00:48:20Three time I
00:48:26Don't I don't know what's in his life. That's so bad. I
00:48:34Love him
00:48:38And I make a point of showing him and telling him every day I
00:48:42I
00:48:45Would like to say something
00:48:48My name is Anthony Boyd, I'm a rookie at the Police Department
00:48:54Several weeks ago. I was on a call following a senior detective on a suicide call. I
00:49:01arrived on scene there were police cars ambulances firetrucks parked all over the street I
00:49:07followed the detective into the garage where the suicide had taken place and
00:49:12That's when I saw her
00:49:14She was lying on the floor lifeless. Cherry red suffocated on the fumes of her classic car. I
00:49:22Can still see her every time I close my eyes I
00:49:25haven't slept since I
00:49:28Remember walking across the lawn and seeing the family of the deceased. They were I
00:49:33Can't even imagine what they were thinking. I
00:49:37Went home that night and I laid in my wife's arms and I sobbed
00:49:41For the family the father the daughters
00:49:44So I cried I'm so thankful that I just had my wife
00:49:48All the training I received didn't even come close to preparing me
00:49:52These are standard questions
00:49:56Have the two of you been fighting lately
00:50:00No
00:50:02Can I ask what the two of you did last night?
00:50:06No, we
00:50:09We danced
00:50:13As Beth ever attempted suicide before
00:50:18No
00:50:21Does your wife have a history of mental illness
00:50:24My wife and I weren't fighting and she wasn't crazy. I know this is difficult. Oh, you know how difficult this is
00:50:32Did your wife kill herself too? Did you find her dead in the garage?
00:50:35No, how about you
00:50:39No, I I haven't so how about we don't pretend that you know how difficult this is
00:50:48You know, I think we got what we need I
00:50:53Didn't realize how far the pain of suicide can reach I
00:50:59Saw one of my crew members at the group last night Ken Parker
00:51:04I've worked with this guy for over two years
00:51:07And I never heard a thing about his wife committing suicide or if about his son trying to
00:51:16It explains a lot
00:51:19It explains what?
00:51:22He's a talented guy
00:51:24But the last year he's just been so up and down I
00:51:30Wish there's something I could do to help him. I
00:51:36Don't know how he does it does what
00:51:40Live every day knowing it could be his son's last today can be anyone's last day
00:51:45Live every day knowing it could be his son's last today can be anyone's last day
00:51:54If I had to find Beth dead two more time I
00:52:03Can't sleep
00:52:06Every time I close my eyes I see her laying in my arms every time I smell car exhaust
00:52:12I remember gagging on it after getting her out of the car. I'm
00:52:17Surrounded by horrible memories
00:52:21If I had to go through that again, I
00:52:25Couldn't do it
00:52:27Well Ken looks at it differently
00:52:30Even though his son's tried three times. He still has him
00:52:34As long as Max is still breathing. There's still a chance for things to go on a chance for change
00:52:41He's living in fear every day you're living with questions questions that may never be answered
00:52:51You can't undo
00:52:54Something that's already been done. There's no there's no chance for Beth to come out of it to come back
00:53:04What's worse fear regret
00:53:07Regret you need to complete your relationship with Beth
00:53:14We all leave things unfinished with each other every day we don't want to admit that this might be the last time we see someone
00:53:21It's especially important in a suicide to come to terms with those things left unfinished and unsettled
00:53:28Ken doesn't have to complete his relationship yet. You do
00:53:36You
00:53:44Thanks Ken sure Ken
00:53:51About the other night. I'm sorry. I didn't know
00:53:55It's all right. I try really hard not to let anybody at work know about that. Well, I'll keep it under wraps. Thank you
00:54:03Uh, you know, I was wondering I was wondering if you'd be willing to meet with my son Max
00:54:11You want me to meet with your son I
00:54:15Know what you've been going through I
00:54:18Thought if
00:54:20Max heard about what suicide does to someone from someone who's not as doctor or his dad
00:54:28But it might make a difference
00:54:33I
00:54:58Bet that's me
00:55:04I'm well, you know
00:55:18So my dad conned you into this great
00:55:28So max
00:55:30Tell me about yourself
00:55:33Well, I'm sure you know the details
00:55:35My mom killed herself and I got depressed and then I tried to kill myself blah blah blah blah. I
00:55:44Know about what's happened to you, but I don't know you
00:55:53Look
00:55:56You're not the first person I've had to meet with
00:56:00I've met with so many
00:56:02Therapists and people who want to try and fix me. I don't remember their names
00:56:07so whatever you hope to accomplish from this I
00:56:11Wouldn't set your expectations too high
00:56:15He doesn't want to talk that's fine you do the talking
00:56:19What do I say talk about whatever you want?
00:56:22Open up to him you two have a lot in common
00:56:25He like you is going through a really hard time
00:56:29He has to sit there with you. If you're talking he must be listening
00:56:40So, how's your day going
00:56:49Did you inherit your dad's skills with a nail gun
00:56:56I
00:57:01Think the only thing that my girls inherited from me is my stubbornness
00:57:09They get all their good qualities from their mom
00:57:17She passed away a few weeks ago
00:57:23Yeah, she
00:57:25Taped a hose to our car and
00:57:32That was it
00:57:35And she was gone
00:57:39Hopefully they don't get that quality from her I
00:57:49Know you're trying to get me to give up, but it's not gonna work
00:57:55You can't get rid of me that easy
00:58:01Look I'm sorry about your wife, but I I really don't want any help
00:58:07I'm not here to help you
00:58:10I'm here for me. I
00:58:15Need to know what my wife was thinking the night she committed suicide
00:58:20And I was hoping
00:58:23That maybe you could help shed some light on that give me some insight
00:58:39Well
00:58:42First time I tried to kill myself I
00:58:46Used the hose in the window technique I
00:58:49I was 14 and my dad. He just got a new car. I
00:58:58Remember I
00:59:01Taped up the hose and then I brought it in through the window
00:59:08Then I hopped in the seat hit the start button
00:59:13And I waited I
00:59:16Just sat there squeezing my eyes shut just hoping to drift off
00:59:28Eventually my dad found me asleep in the car
00:59:36It was a hybrid
00:59:38You
00:59:42Didn't know that the hybrid doesn't admit exhaust when they're not in motion
00:59:48No, I I didn't
00:59:51It's kind of funny
00:59:53He was so mad. I mean I used up the battery in the car. He had to have it towed back to the dealership
00:59:59I
01:00:04Was going through your head that would make you want to kill yourself I
01:00:14Wanted it to end your life
01:00:19The sadness
01:00:22The world is a horrible place I I mean I look at life and
01:00:27There are some really mean self-centered people out there. I just seem to have a big target on my back
01:00:39So, why did your wife do it I
01:00:44Don't know
01:00:48I've gone back to every day. We were together. I've looked at every picture
01:00:56I
01:01:00Still can't figure it out
01:01:14Do you need some help with your homework? No
01:01:23Hey Lauren, what are you drawing?
01:01:26mommy
01:01:27Really?
01:01:28What's she doing? She's dead in the car
01:01:34Lauren honey, let's um, let's color in this instead. Okay
01:01:47Hey, hey, how you doing? We're good
01:01:56Okay, let me help okay
01:02:11That's not right
01:02:16Yes, it is what's not how mom did it I know but it's the way I do it
01:02:26Sadie please I hate this mom's supposed to be helping me with my homework. Not you
01:02:34Mom's supposed to be cooking not her. I don't want a new mom. I am NOT trying to be your mom
01:02:56Sadie leave me alone
01:03:26I
01:03:56I
01:04:26I
01:04:56I
01:05:12Guess it's okay. Well, then you should be able to get a job afterwards, right? I mean, yeah
01:05:19Whoa, whoa. Hey
01:05:21Watch where you're going. You just you just ran into him
01:05:27So
01:05:29So next time you should watch where you're going
01:05:33Max
01:05:36Tell your friend here to mind his own business
01:05:41Tell him max
01:05:44Fine well
01:05:46You see everything's kosher
01:05:48Kosher
01:05:54It's one of the reasons why I hate this school, why doesn't he like you
01:06:00Different oh really I
01:06:04Can't explain it. I mean I see it and so does Ryan and everyone else
01:06:10Yeah, well next time you should stand up for yourself
01:06:13Why make things worse?
01:06:15Whoa, whoa, wait a minute. Where are you going going home? I
01:06:25Know what I saw plus I've seen him pushing around the other kids as well
01:06:30Max has never come to me about Ryan. I
01:06:34Will not start pushing buttons that don't need to be pushed
01:06:37But look this Ryan kid has been tormenting max. He's the reason he keeps trying to kill himself
01:06:45It is not your job to fix this. You're right. It's yours
01:06:50So what have you or the school done to help?
01:06:53Oh
01:07:11Look you here. It's Max's buddy. That's right
01:07:15Max is my friend, and I want you to stop bullying him
01:07:19Just giving him a hard time
01:07:20I don't think you understand the stress that you and your friends are putting on Max and his dad
01:07:27Max has tried to commit suicide because of you
01:07:31Look if he's trying to end his pathetic life. That's on him
01:07:36What can I say some people have problems this is not my problem
01:07:49Hey
01:07:51Hey, hey
01:07:53What are you planning on doing with that?
01:07:56if I ever
01:07:59Hear that you are giving Max a hard time ever again
01:08:04Hey, whoa, whoa, okay?
01:08:07geez easy
01:08:18I
01:08:34Am guys no bodyguard today
01:08:41Tried killing yourself lately what don't know you're talking huh, that's funny
01:08:49I don't like being threatened, okay?
01:08:55God you are so pathetic you can't even kill yourself
01:09:00Do you all know that max here is suicidal?
01:09:05Yeah, that's right max has tried killing himself
01:09:10several times
01:09:13you
01:09:15Maybe next time you'll have the balls to get it right
01:09:24The second step to healing is to create an accurate memory picture of Beth
01:09:29I've already told you what I see I can't get it on my head
01:09:33This isn't a physical memory of what they looked like but rather a memory of who they were and how they live on inside of you
01:09:40Well tell me about her
01:09:43What what was she like what made her smile
01:09:50She always seemed happy there were never any ups and downs
01:09:56Let's start with something simple
01:09:58How did you two meet?
01:10:05It was the last day of finals
01:10:08Just before Christmas break and we were hit with a blizzard
01:10:16The whole campus partied it up
01:10:19No, all but those whose finals got pushed back
01:10:23So I retreated back to my room
01:10:28My roommates were insane
01:10:31So I went down to the library because it was the quietest place on campus
01:10:37I
01:10:39Walked to the back of the library and
01:10:43There she was
01:10:46Books scattered all over the table. I
01:10:51Took a seat at a table a few down from her
01:10:59She was so beautiful
01:11:07I tried to keep my mind on my studies, but I couldn't help but look up at her every few seconds and
01:11:17One time she caught me looking over
01:11:22Her blue eyes peeking up over her textbooks
01:11:30We locked eyes
01:11:37I got up the nerve to go over and say hello
01:11:48We
01:11:49Didn't get another minute of work done
01:11:52It was so surreal the snow falling outside and the decorations inside
01:12:00We talked until morning like we were the best friends I
01:12:04I
01:12:06Walked her back to her room and her roommates were still awake as we could hear them from all the way down the hall
01:12:15But I got her to her door and it was just by pure magic that
01:12:23mistletoe
01:12:24Was hanging from her door
01:12:34That was our first kiss
01:12:42Thank you aunt Vanessa
01:12:54Have you talked with mrs. Harrison been going fine haven't used any milk cartons as weapons recently have you
01:13:04I'm Lauren
01:13:06Do you have big plans with aunt Vanessa today? I
01:13:09Wish I could stay at home with aunt Vanessa every day
01:13:12You'd stop me from getting anything done
01:13:15But it would be fun
01:13:23Sadie can you hurry up? We got to get you to school
01:13:26whatever
01:13:28Sadie
01:13:30You need to start treating your aunt Vanessa with some respect whatever
01:14:01Are
01:14:03You okay Sadie fine
01:14:08Do you want to color with me Lauren, please leave me alone
01:14:31I
01:14:36Gonna be late for school, buddy
01:14:40Max
01:14:42Hey
01:14:45Max you all right
01:14:48I'm not going
01:14:53Everything okay at school I
01:14:56I
01:14:58Wish you would just talk to me
01:15:01If there's a problem, let me help let will help or dr. Walker or stand up for yourself
01:15:07Don't you sit around your room all day feeling sorry for yourself. Come on. Let's go do something about it
01:15:25Hey
01:15:28Hey
01:15:32Whoa max hey shut up
01:15:38Look I understand you hoped I would get it right this time
01:15:48Do it kill me
01:15:55Okay
01:15:59Please don't you're the weak one
01:16:17Suicide attempt
01:16:25Oh
01:16:41You and your sister are everything to me
01:16:47And it hurts me to see this way
01:16:55I feel like I not only lost my wife, but I also lost my little girl
01:17:11I love you, Sadie
01:17:21Good night Lauren
01:17:25I love you. Love you too, daddy
01:17:28Daddy, yeah, baby. I won't talk about mom anymore because it makes you cry. I
01:17:37Want you to talk about her we need to remember her every day
01:17:42See daddy you're sad
01:17:46I'm not sad. I'm just remembering how amazing she was
01:17:51Oh
01:18:03Well your son's lucky the bullet missed anything by that one pass just straight through
01:18:07He's gonna be okay. Yes, but we're gonna have to keep him a few days to monitor him
01:18:11And then he's likely to be placed back into treatment
01:18:15This was his third attempt
01:18:17Can I see him?
01:18:20He's resting right now, but you're welcome to go and stay with him.
01:18:23Thank you, Doctor.
01:18:48Hey, Dad.
01:18:49There's still a blood stain on the mailbox.
01:18:52Oh, I can get that.
01:18:54You better.
01:18:56It's your fault you're dumb enough to piss off that crazy kid.
01:18:59Yeah, that kid comes back, I'm gonna hand you over to him.
01:19:02Dad, please don't talk to me like that.
01:19:05You don't tell me what to do. Got it?
01:19:22Max?
01:19:28Dad?
01:19:34I'm here, son.
01:19:40Where am I?
01:19:46The hospital.
01:19:51Oh.
01:20:10Dad, I'm...
01:20:12I'm sorry, Dad.
01:20:14For all of this.
01:20:15It's okay.
01:20:17It's all right.
01:20:21I wish I could finish it.
01:20:24I wish I would have just died.
01:20:26Max, please.
01:20:29You made it through again.
01:20:31There's gotta be a reason.
01:20:36I know you want me to tell you that I'm better now.
01:20:44That I want to live.
01:20:48That I'll never try this again.
01:20:54But I can't.
01:20:58I'm sorry.
01:21:01Just rest now.
01:21:05Just rest.
01:21:12Keep your eyes closed.
01:21:13Yes.
01:21:14Keep them closed.
01:21:16Keep them closed.
01:21:18I got you.
01:21:20I got you.
01:21:22No peeking.
01:21:24Do I smell mac and cheese?
01:21:29What is this?
01:21:32This, my darling, is a date.
01:21:42Dad.
01:21:48Hey, Ken.
01:21:49Will.
01:21:54I just wanted to tell you that Max is getting better.
01:22:00That's great.
01:22:02Yeah.
01:22:04Uh, look, Ken.
01:22:08I'm sorry.
01:22:11I was just trying to help, and I crossed the line.
01:22:16You did try to help.
01:22:19You did exactly what I asked you to do.
01:22:22You know, this last attempt, it was, uh,
01:22:25it came as a complete surprise to me.
01:22:30Because for a moment, Max seemed like his old self again.
01:22:37He had a sweetness about him that he had before his mom died.
01:22:45That was because of you.
01:22:48You know, the truth is that Max was given to me as a gift from God to watch over.
01:22:57He and his mom.
01:23:01And I failed them both.
01:23:07Anyway, uh, you really should go see him.
01:23:13I don't think that's a very good idea.
01:23:16He needs you, Will.
01:23:19There's still a chance for him.
01:23:24You think about it, all right?
01:23:27All right.
01:23:36I can't.
01:23:39I can't.
01:23:42I can't wait.
01:23:44I can't wait.
01:23:52Vanessa, I know life has been about Will and the girls recently.
01:24:00But seeing you with them has made me realize I cannot be without you.
01:24:11Vanessa Ann Martin.
01:24:16Will you marry me?
01:24:21Yes.
01:24:24Okay.
01:24:32Yeah!
01:24:39There's one last thing I have for you.
01:24:42It's time to say goodbye.
01:24:47I don't know how.
01:24:50It's something we don't do well as people.
01:24:54And when we do say goodbye, it's usually not meant with the finality of saying goodbye to someone who has died.
01:25:01I think you need to go home.
01:25:04Go through her things.
01:25:06Make it a home again.
01:25:08But for you and your daughters.
01:25:10Tell Beth goodbye.
01:25:20Okay.
01:25:51Vanessa.
01:25:59I'm so sorry, Will.
01:26:03What am I supposed to do now?
01:26:05You can move on.
01:26:07You know it wasn't you.
01:26:09You can have the peace so many families search for.
01:26:14Why didn't she talk to me?
01:26:17She should have talked to me.
01:26:18Yes, she should have.
01:26:19But she was dealing with things long before she met you.
01:26:25It's hard to undo bad habits.
01:26:27Women in these situations tend to believe that they don't deserve to be happy.
01:26:31And in extreme cases, tragedy happens.
01:26:35It's not that she was unhappy.
01:26:36She was too happy.
01:26:38People can only accept the love they think they deserve.
01:26:42I know all that.
01:26:44But now I know who's responsible.
01:26:46What did you do about this woman who was tormenting her?
01:26:48There's nothing you can do.
01:26:52She should have to look me in the eye and know the damage that she's done.
01:26:56Do you really think that'll make a difference?
01:26:59It would for me.
01:27:02Let it go, Will.
01:27:04Like Beth tried to let it go.
01:27:06This woman wouldn't let her let it go.
01:27:09Okay, listen to me.
01:27:10It's not this woman's fault that Beth is dead.
01:27:13It's not Ryan's fault that Max tried to shoot himself.
01:27:17People are fully responsible for their own actions.
01:27:19And I know it's hard to hear, Will, but it's the truth.
01:27:26Okay, I can't stop you.
01:27:28But by doing this, you'll be continuing the situation.
01:27:32You're no better off than she is.
01:27:35You need to let it go, Will.
01:27:38Just let it go.
01:28:09Will.
01:28:14You are so beautiful.
01:28:18We are so blessed.
01:28:21We are?
01:28:22No.
01:28:23The girls and I.
01:28:27Life with you is so right.
01:28:30We couldn't ask for anything more.
01:28:33I love everything about you.
01:28:42I wake up every morning and I thank God that I get to spend the rest of my life with you.
01:28:53What's the matter?
01:28:59I'm fine.
01:29:00Let's just go to bed.
01:29:30I love you.
01:30:00I love you.
01:30:27Sadie, are you okay?
01:30:29I'm fine.
01:30:36Wait.
01:30:40I need help.
01:31:11Sweetie, are you okay?
01:31:16I'm fine.
01:31:19We can take a break.
01:31:20No, keep going.
01:31:23I want Mama to see how beautiful I can be.
01:31:40You look absolutely stunning.
01:31:49I miss Mama.
01:31:52You're so pretty, I know.
01:32:10I love you.
01:32:28So I found my wife's journal.
01:32:31And you got your answers?
01:32:34I did.
01:32:37Did it make it easier?
01:32:41No.
01:32:44You're lucky.
01:32:46You know that, right?
01:32:49You have another chance.
01:32:53Don't ever let anyone make you feel like you're not worth it.
01:33:04There will always be those people out there who are going to be sure to point out your faults.
01:33:10People love to place blame and point fingers.
01:33:13They're so full of poison.
01:33:18And they're willing to give it away for free.
01:33:22All you can do is control yourself.
01:33:27You can't let what other people say affect you.
01:33:34You've got to shrug it off.
01:33:37And then you have to forgive them.
01:33:47You know, surround yourself with people who will strengthen you.
01:33:55And then let them.
01:34:03Life is so precious.
01:34:06Don't take it for granted.
01:34:10Live, Max.
01:34:13Live your life.
01:34:18Oh, I can come back at another time, it's fine.
01:34:22No, no, no.
01:34:24It's about to leave.
01:34:54Do I look pretty, Mama?
01:35:20I put on makeup for you.
01:35:23I tried to do it by myself.
01:35:27But I didn't know how.
01:35:33You said you'd be there for me when I was ready.
01:35:36But you weren't.
01:35:39Do you think I look pretty?
01:35:43Do I, Mom?
01:35:48She can't tell me I'm pretty.
01:35:51She's dead.
01:35:52She's never coming back.
01:35:55Look at me.
01:35:57You are so beautiful.
01:36:00You're the sweetest, most darling 11-year-old girl.
01:36:05I know Mom is gone.
01:36:07We are here.
01:36:10We love you.
01:36:12And we are never going to leave you, Sadie.
01:36:15I promise.
01:36:36You go back with Uncle Scott and Aunt Vanessa?
01:36:58I'm sorry I haven't been here to talk to you sooner.
01:37:03It's been a rough few months.
01:37:05But we are getting through.
01:37:09Every day is a different challenge.
01:37:14I've tried to move on.
01:37:17I've tried to forgive you.
01:37:20I've made excuses as to why things ended up the way they have.
01:37:26But none of that helps.
01:37:30I'm so mad at you, Beth.
01:37:35Why didn't you come to me?
01:37:36Why didn't you tell me what was going on?
01:37:39We were best friends.
01:37:44There's nothing you could have told me that would have made me love you any less.
01:37:50We could have gotten through this.
01:37:53Together.
01:37:57None of that matters now.
01:37:59It's too late.
01:38:00I mean, you're gone.
01:38:04There's nothing I can do about it.
01:38:11So, I'm going to take our two beautiful girls home.
01:38:19I'm going to watch them grow into beautiful women.
01:38:27Women I know you would have been proud of.
01:38:31And I'm sure that I will cry from time to time wishing that you could see the smiles on their faces as they grow.
01:38:42As they go on their first dates.
01:38:46As I walk them down the aisle.
01:38:50I promise to cherish the memories that you missed.
01:38:58I know you thought this would end the pain, Beth, but it didn't.
01:39:07You have no idea how many lives your death has affected.
01:39:16I will go on dates.
01:39:18I will try to love again.
01:39:22I will hold the door and I will pull out her chair for her.
01:39:31I will do my best to love her.
01:39:37Like I still love you.
01:39:52Bye, Beth.
01:40:05So, what's next?
01:40:09We live.
01:40:35I live past yesterday, I'm here right now.
01:41:00My brain keeps wondering in and out.
01:41:08I'm breathing in and I'm not sure how.
01:41:17Life's been rough to me, I've been shut down.
01:41:26The cold wind bites and traps my lips.
01:41:34I'm here right now screaming this is it.
01:41:43Call it quits and end this day.
01:41:48I will stay.
01:41:52My cash shed and I know spring gives change.
01:42:09My reason for thought breaking out of my cage.
01:42:18I've gotten fed up looking at the same page.
01:42:27I've got some ideas, I'll write them all down.
01:42:36Open your eyes and find what I've found.
01:42:45The cold wind bites and traps my lips.
01:42:53I'm here right now screaming this is it.
01:43:02Call it quits and end this day.
01:43:07I will stay.
01:43:11My cash shed and I know spring gives change.
01:43:37The cold wind bites and traps my lips.
01:43:45I'm here right now screaming this is it.
01:43:54Call it quits and end this day.
01:43:59I will stay.
01:44:03My cash shed and I know spring gives change.