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00:00How long do these things usually last, Inspector? I have a pauling cramp.
00:10As long as it takes, son. The trick is to stretch out every half hour, and if you get
00:14too cold... Yes?
00:15Piss yourself. So much they didn't teach in college.
00:19Butter, what's happening? You're not police, and your dad said on no
00:24account I might tell you about this stakeout. What stakeout?
00:27Nor am I giving you these binoculars. She's stashing something. Let's nick her.
00:37We'll check the bag for diamonds first. Then nick her?
00:40Nicking's the best bit. Go! Back up, rabbit. This is Inspector Tanner's case.
00:47What a dolly plonker you are. That's my bleeding tip off.
00:50You're not having it, I'm afraid, old bean. It's more my sort of thing, really.
00:55The owner of the yard catches the beauty behind Jewel's smuggling ring.
00:59They'll be kissing my arse from Tower Hill to Buck's Row.
01:02Chin chin. Was something ticking?
01:05Yeah. Tanner, if I was you, I'd put that bag down.
01:09If I was you, rabbit, I'd shut my cock holster. It's every man for himself these days.
01:18Holy fuck. There he goes.
01:25Step it away, brick man. Step it up and down. Step it away, brick man. London town.
01:35Step it away, brick man. Step it up and down. Step it away, brick man. All fall down.
01:39That's Tanner. What news from the hospital?
01:42Well, he's alive, but he's lost some bits. Which bits?
01:46A straight bit, a round bit, a curly bit. I'm not really a doctor.
01:52I've seen those all over the place.
01:55No, it's nearly brick night. You can't have brick night without...
01:58Brick man. Naturally. What are you talking about?
02:01It's an East End thing. Don't they have bricks in incest upon Avon?
02:04In every brick night, brick man steps out of brick world.
02:07He wears brick clothes and has a brick face, and if you don't believe in him,
02:10he stabs you in the neck repeatedly with his brick knife.
02:13It's just a bit of fun for the kids. No, brick man, no.
02:16Where did you get this ridiculous talisman? This is blasphemy.
02:20There is no such thing as brick man.
02:23Oi, Bible boy, if you want to fight with someone and you fight me,
02:27no, actually, fight him. He's fitter and I can't be arsed with him.
02:31Heathens.
02:34There you go, girl. Have a penny. Buy yourself a new doll.
02:38They're sixpence. Yeah, well, you can fuck that.
02:41In your name, my lord,
02:44I cleanse this city of false idols.
03:00Now do you believe?
03:03Please. I beg you.
03:11No!
03:16There's been a murder. Fucking brilliant.
03:19Shut it. Duck pond lane. A stabbing in the neck.
03:22And in the wound, a quantity of red dust.
03:25Looks like your mum's cooking, John.
03:28A brick man imitator. A dupe-brickard, if you will.
03:32I want this cracked like a witcher's mirror. You should use psychology.
03:36It don't exist, guv. We need to get out there and break some fingers.
03:40Find some leads and break their fingers.
03:42Find the culprits and break their fingers.
03:44Find the lead's culprits and break their fingers.
03:46Get right up inside the fingers. Finger the fingerers.
03:49It's all about the fingers.
03:51Do it. We are dealing with one sick individual.
03:54Sounds to me like someone needs to shit or get off the pot.
04:00Rabbit, Strauss, go solve this.
04:03Not now! When I say.
04:06I now say.
04:10Not you.
04:16Come.
04:20My weekly report, Mum. Proceed.
04:27Um, the attempt to end the lives of Rabbit and his associates...
04:32Let me stop you there, Maud.
04:34We don't attempt. We do.
04:36Indeed, Mum. And a second operation will...
04:50For someone, bring me my street shoes. I've got work to do.
04:55You can't be police, even if I wanted you to.
04:59Which I don't.
05:00I'm as good as dead.
05:02Which I don't.
05:03I'm as good as any bloke in there. I'm a fist with legs.
05:07Why can't you think about the things women are meant to think about?
05:10Spuniels wearing ribbons. Kittens in moonlight.
05:14Come on, Dad. Give me anything. No matter how small.
05:19Well, there is a new crime wave we need to stop.
05:23I'm your man. Who isn't a man?
05:27Stop. Bicycle first.
05:32Come and join our Whitechapel Historical Fellowship.
05:37Hello.
05:38Hello.
05:39Would you like to join our Historical Fellowship?
05:41Fascinating lectures with no distractions.
05:43We pride ourselves on our lack of refreshments.
05:46No. I think he only stopped because your daughter was giving him the salmon.
05:50We've got stuff to do. Come on.
05:55Goodbye.
05:56Goodbye.
06:02I can't breathe. My legs are like jelly. My mind's racing.
06:06Is this love?
06:07No. We're just past the hat factory.
06:09You're off your tits on airborne mercury.
06:11Is that Bellin from yesterday?
06:13May God rest your soul.
06:14Doesn't make sense, sir. A night watchman was right nearby,
06:17but nobody saw the killer. No trace.
06:19There's always a trace.
06:25Brick dust.
06:29Look.
06:32This is the way to do it, Strauss.
06:34None of your psychorology twollocks.
06:36Psychologists say one's father greatly influences a chap's character.
06:40My father certainly did. Three times a year I met him.
06:43I never knew my dad. I know he named us after animals.
06:47His leopard, my brother. His sister, Weasel.
06:50He wrote the names on our heads before dumping us outside a church.
06:53Good grief. A brick wall.
06:57Just as the street ends in a brick wall.
07:00Just as the street ends in a brick wall.
07:02Does cold science, too, have its limits?
07:05Is Brick Man real?
07:07Could this be the door to the brick world?
07:14Well, that's the way in.
07:16But you're still out, really.
07:20Hello.
07:21The police are giving free advice on how to secure your bicycle.
07:24And what's that?
07:26Oh, the chain.
07:27Yeah, you shouldn't just secure the front wheels
07:29because the little shits will just nip the rest of it.
07:31Move.
07:32How come they let one of you lot in the place?
07:34Well, women do a lot of things now.
07:36That's not what I meant.
07:40I'm going to count to two.
07:42And you're going to fuck right off or I'll show you just how police I can be.
07:47One.
07:54Not so chatty now, you racist shit.
07:57Ah!
08:05Don't mention it.
08:06Us girls, we've got to look out for each other.
08:08So, where were we?
08:10Don't worry.
08:12There's been a change of plan.
08:21Other dimensions, my puckered arse.
08:23This is how Brick Man gets about.
08:25London sewers. Best in the world, they say.
08:27I'm not sure they spend a lot of time down here.
08:29Shh, shh, shh. What was that noise?
08:31Inspector, I think I saw something.
08:35That felt like a brick.
08:36Run!
08:41Bravo, Tanner. Welcome back, sir.
08:47Welcome back, sir.
08:49Who was she?
08:51The bomber?
08:52The trail's gone cold, sir.
08:54We think maybe there was no dual smuggling ring.
08:56The bomb was meant for Raffi.
09:00Quite a nice job they've done on your bonce, sir.
09:02It took more than a bang to stop brave Tanner of the yard.
09:04I'll tell you about bravery, son.
09:08In the Sudan, I watched blokes getting their ears blown off.
09:12Young fellas ripped in two by frightened horses.
09:16One poor Welsh lad snagged his turkey purse on a barbed wire fence
09:21and watched his little peanuts fall into the grateful mouth of a desert shrew.
09:25The look on his face.
09:27Horrific.
09:31This was meant for Raffi.
09:33And while he's puffing my gruff and winding my whistle,
09:37I will make sure he gets what's coming to him.
09:45Stop!
09:47Or at least slow down by 25%.
09:49Hello, brick man.
09:51I'm police man.
09:53Come to arrest the living shit out of you.
09:55Oh, God, it's you.
09:57I didn't see it was you, Mr. Rabid.
09:59I thought you were some new lads working my patch.
10:03Who is this sewer dweller?
10:05This is Murky John. He's a tosher.
10:07Ooh, what's that?
10:09I'm compiling a list of appalling East End occupations.
10:11We scavenge the sewers for anything worth a few bub.
10:13Is that legal?
10:15What you might call a grey area.
10:17Rabid, how about this
10:19for the lady in your life?
10:21Don't think you can bribe me, Murky.
10:23Actually, that's quite nice.
10:25You only have the worst job I've encountered
10:27since becoming a policeman.
10:29There's a few downsides.
10:31Drowning, cholera, tetanus,
10:33buildup of flammable gases
10:35exploding into a huge fireball.
10:37The rats dragging you off
10:39to feed the rat king.
10:41You seen anything weird lately, Murky John?
10:43Last night,
10:45a gentleman walking the pipes
10:47brick coat,
10:49brick hat,
10:51brick face
10:53into touches a scared rabbit
10:55to catch him
10:57before he comes for us all.
10:59Oof!
11:07Morning, rabbit.
11:09Breakfast.
11:12Is that banging inside my head
11:14or is that for real?
11:16Bastards putting electric lights
11:18all down the streets.
11:20Bad for business running a pub
11:22under electric light.
11:24Why is that?
11:26Makes me look older.
11:28I'm what you call a small beauty.
11:30Course you are, girl.
11:32Hang on.
11:34Oi!
11:36What's your game, soppy nuts?
11:38Brick man struck again last night
11:40but he can't come through no walls
11:42if you knock him down first.
11:44Oh, God. Where was it?
11:46You do that again, dick boy
11:48and I'll lop him off with a spoon.
11:50Brick man.
11:52Brick man.
11:54Let me guess. No witnesses.
11:56Why won't you coppers catch brick man?
11:58You don't give a monkey's about
12:00the likes of us.
12:02Shut your mouth, you old bastard.
12:04We should break every brick wall
12:06in London town.
12:08Break every wall!
12:10Break every wall!
12:12Break every wall!
12:14Listen, Mr Larkham.
12:16No, you listen.
12:18People are scared of bricks, for Christ's sake.
12:20I've got 200 workers at my brickworks.
12:22If we close today, they don't eat tomorrow.
12:24Why not?
12:26Because I don't pay them enough.
12:28Find the killer.
12:30I've got my best people on it.
12:32What have you got?
12:34Well, he moves through the sewers
12:36A shit squad.
12:38A shit squad.
12:40I think you already have.
12:42A squad made up of men who don't mind getting their hands dirty.
12:44Men who wade in shit, toss shit,
12:46eat shit, juggle shit,
12:48swim in shit.
12:50Shitty men.
12:52Shitty coppers.
12:54I'd be proud to serve alongside Inspector Rabbit in such a unit.
12:56You're not going to put that ridiculous clown Rabbit on it, are you?
12:58Rabbit's one of my best rong-and-bang-a-roppers.
13:00Who's that girl who took down that bag snatcher?
13:02She's showing your lot right up.
13:05But...
13:07I am a friend of the Home Secretary.
13:09We both play petanque together.
13:11If you can't find this murderer, he will get in someone who can.
13:13Good day.
13:15Mr. Larcombe,
13:17you're a very rich and powerful man.
13:19Two qualities I admire greatly.
13:21Never mind that.
13:23Tell me.
13:25What happened to Rabbit's eyebrow?
13:27His dog bit it off or something at Christmas time.
13:29But everyone needs a friend in the station.
13:31I could be such a friend for you, sir.
13:33What's left of my left eye just winked at you.
13:37Mabel!
13:39You're on Brickman with these two.
13:41Yes! You won't regret it.
13:43But if you do, it'll be too late, so who cares?
13:45Well done, girl.
13:47But don't bollock on about that.
13:49Psychology! We need to get inside the killer's head.
13:51So what's his history with Brickman?
13:53The Historical Fellowship.
13:55She's the one I want to see.
13:57I mean, she's the one we want to see.
13:59Sorry, they're the ones we want to see.
14:01Yeah.
14:03Come on, horny boy.
14:05Police.
14:07Police.
14:09As good as police.
14:11Just say I'm police. Everyone say I'm police for now.
14:13Tell us about Brickman.
14:15The whole lot.
14:17Look sharp, chief, because I get bored real easy.
14:19Please take a seat.
14:21Now, how old do you think the legend of the Brickman is?
14:23I ain't got a bleeding clue, mate.
14:25That's why I'm asking you.
14:27What if I were to tell you
14:29that Brickman was killed this year?
14:31Well, then I would tell you fancy that.
14:33His first appearance in an advertisement
14:35for Larcombe Bricks, founded by Sir John Larcombe.
14:37We met his son.
14:39He's a bellend.
14:41He's actually a patron of ours, and he's a wonderful man.
14:43He's a wonderful bellend?
14:45We've not been properly introduced. Sergeant Strauss.
14:47Harriet, you're awfully young for a policeman.
14:49Well, you're very young for an historian.
14:51Once this was all countryside,
14:53and then the East End was built from Larcombe Bricks
14:55with Brickman the star.
14:58Brickman's got this smiling gob.
15:00You don't look much like the stabbing type.
15:02Well, once the East End was built,
15:04demand for bricks dropped.
15:06So they gave Brickman an edgy rebrand.
15:08Bugger me.
15:10A public relations disaster.
15:12The adverts were withdrawn.
15:14But the myth had begun.
15:16Maybe somebody wants to close down the brick factory.
15:18Well, they're going the wrong way about it.
15:20Scarce pass.
15:22You can knock down every wall in London,
15:24but then you have to rebuild, and what do you use?
15:26Bricks.
15:28And Mr. Larcombe will make a fortune.
15:30Did Larcombe ever dress up as Brickman?
15:32Hang on.
15:34Yes.
15:36For the Lord Mayor's parade.
15:38Look, I was thinking,
15:40do you like dancing?
15:42I don't know.
15:44No one's ever requested a dance.
15:46That's funny, because I've never had anyone to ask.
15:48Would you like to?
15:50Yes.
15:52Are you two gonna fuck or what?
15:54I'll call it like I see it.
15:56It's just me being me.
15:58Move.
16:02Have you found the murderer yet?
16:04Well, let's hope so.
16:06Cuff him.
16:08What?
16:10So thank you for ruining my only chance of happiness.
16:12Relax, Strauss. This is England. It's chock-a-block with mousy girls.
16:14You're making a big mistake, rabbit.
16:16Am I now?
16:18Well, you do not have to say anything,
16:20because it might...
16:22Unbelievable.
16:24Not a bit.
16:26Brickman strikes again.
16:28Police fucking useless.
16:30For God's sake.
16:32Lazy, bleeding coppers.
16:34Can't even chase a monster into its own dimension.
16:38Are you mad?
16:40Where's your evidence?
16:42Well, I know your big mistake.
16:44You killed wearing a Brickman company costume.
16:46Thing is, it wasn't waterproof.
16:48You still had sewer water in your shoes.
16:50That's a nice pipe.
16:52Use water to make bricks, you fucking idiot.
16:54Release me now,
16:56or you'll regret it.
16:58All right. You're free to go.
17:02Oh, no, hang on.
17:04I found this in your coat pocket.
17:06I've never seen that before.
17:08Matches the other half found at the crime scene.
17:10Police. He planted it.
17:12Why would I kill anyone?
17:14Father issues.
17:17Your dad built the brick factory, but now it's in trouble.
17:19You're killing to show the world
17:21you're just as good as he is.
17:23You all right, girl?
17:25She's right.
17:27Though I still think this psycho horror tree
17:29is total bullshit.
17:31My father was worth a dozen of yours, rabbit.
17:33No, make that a hundred.
17:35Yes. I knew your papa all right.
17:37A rotten ball of meat and whiskey
17:39in the shape of a man
17:41in your mother wasn't much better.
17:43I laughed like a drain
17:45when they pulled her out of the Thames.
17:51Sergeant Strauss,
17:53would you lock the door?
17:59Sergeant Strauss, would you unlock the door?
18:01Ah!
18:07What the bloody hell's been going on here?
18:09He's the killer.
18:11Oh, rabbit, the killer just struck again
18:13You're free to go.
18:15You're a dead man.
18:17Dead?
18:21Shit.
18:25This is the work of your local police.
18:27They will not protect people like you.
18:29You're me,
18:31the common factory owner in the street.
18:33It is about time
18:35the police get what's coming to them.
18:39Larkin's behind this, and he's got accomplices.
18:41And that ain't just guesswork.
18:43I bloody know it.
18:45Um, chaps, it's looking pretty dicey out there.
18:49Hold on a blinking,
18:51bleeding fucking second.
18:53Meadow Hill, Oakwood Row, Duckbond Lane.
18:55They're all rural, countrysidey names,
18:57and Larkin hates that.
18:59He wants the whole world bricked over.
19:01That's why he kills. And because he's got the taste.
19:03He's got the taste. The killer's got a pattern.
19:05It's the shape of a brick.
19:07Don't be stupid. It's three dots. That could be any pattern.
19:10Barley Lane.
19:12It's the shape of a brick.
19:14Okay, fair enough.
19:16And that's where he's gonna strike next. We need to get out of here.
19:18But how do we get through the riot?
19:20We blend in. Perfect.
19:26What do we do now?
19:28We wait.
19:30Can I just say what wonderful people you are?
19:32Shut up.
19:34If anything happens, it's been a privilege to serve with a fine officer
19:36and someone pretending to be an officer.
19:38Shush.
19:40I think this might be a waste of time.
19:54The brick world.
19:56It's all true.
19:58This is the sewers.
20:00Smell the gases. And shit.
20:02Mainly shit.
20:04Where are you, Larkin?
20:06None of you believed.
20:10You couldn't have dragged the three of us down here on your own.
20:12You'd have needed help.
20:14Murky John, I bet.
20:16Those toshers, they know this sewers.
20:18Those who do not believe...
20:20die.
20:22Funny thing is, Larkin,
20:24I left you with a limp. Now you ain't got one, Larkin.
20:26So I reckon, Larkin,
20:28you ain't Larkin.
20:30Who is it?
20:32Who else knew about Brick Man and what we was up to?
20:36The history twats.
20:38Too late.
20:40I'm gonna cut you
20:42from arsehole to breakfast time.
20:44Oh.
20:46Harriet, why are you pretending to be in league with this villain?
20:48Don't bother, son.
20:50She hates us as much as she hates bricks.
20:52Shut your funnel.
20:54She wishes England was green again.
20:56You want the lost world.
20:58The Larkins bricked over paradise.
21:00Did I say that you could fucking speak?
21:02So you want to make people scared of bricks so they flee the city.
21:04So you would arrest him
21:06and then he would be at the station
21:08and bang, we strike.
21:10Can I just check?
21:12What we had between us, was that real?
21:14What do you think,
21:16you chinless bucket?
21:18Is it a yes?
21:20When your mangled bodies are found,
21:22the city will empty
21:24and then nature can take back what is hers.
21:26All this for some metals.
21:28I say, Dad,
21:30you couldn't light a fag for us, could you,
21:33They're in my top pocket.
21:35Did I say that you could move?
21:37No, dear.
21:39Then stay where you are. It's a trap.
21:41Sorry, dear.
21:43You know what? My dad was a wanker,
21:45but you're worse, mate.
21:47She's clearly needed boundaries her entire life.
21:49You've given her fuck all.
21:51You know what?
21:53You can have a cigarette.
21:55No, we can't, you gaping dick.
21:57Young lady,
21:59I have spent countless hours
22:01in a flammable costume,
22:03helping you with your killing and mutilating.
22:05A thank you wouldn't hurt.
22:07Come on, Chief. I'm gasping here.
22:09I won't fucking tell you again, Dad.
22:11Do not do it.
22:13Whoa!
22:15Ah!
22:17Sorry, fellas.
22:19I forgot to warn you about the build-up
22:21of the highly flammable gases.
22:23Strauss Coffin, right over.
22:25There's plenty of bricks
22:27where you're going.
22:29Did you think of that just now or hours ago?
22:31Just now.
22:33Ha! Liar.
22:39When a policeman meets someone
22:41and falls in love,
22:43does she always turn out to be the killer?
22:45No. Sometimes she gets killed.
22:47On the morning of your wedding day.
22:49Rabbit, doctor's report
22:51on Larcombe's injuries.
22:53I'll just buy him a cocktail.
22:55Look at him, the size of that.
22:57I'll have to buy him the pub.
22:59Home secretary's involved.
23:01There's gonna be an inquiry.
23:03Police brutality.
23:05Where you could vouch for me.
23:07Like as he hit me first, that might even be true.
23:09Come back...
23:11I guess who's in charge of the inquiry?
23:13You're joking.
23:15Send more.
23:17Does that mean it's you?
23:19Don't worry, darling, I'll be completely impartial.
23:21And then I'm gonna melt you down,
23:23my old China.
23:25Run, rabbit.
23:27Run.
23:35Hello?
23:37Oh, er, Lydia?
23:39Miss Whispych.
23:41I am so glad you accepted
23:43my invitation. Do come in.
23:47I have a little club for women.
23:49We believe that women
23:51are the future.
23:53I've had that my whole life.
23:55That and a corset that doesn't make my kidneys pop out of my ears.
24:01I think you and I are going to become great friends.
24:03Tea?
24:05Ah, yes, please.
24:07That's nice. You take lemon?
24:09Lemon? Is that new?
24:23Yeah.