• 2 months ago
Large | Rough N' Rowdy
Transcript
00:00The Able Brothers are... they're different.
00:03Oh my God!
00:05He's twisted in the ass!
00:07What was it about the ropes that you wanted to go over so much?
00:11I don't know. It's just when you're in there, shit happens.
00:14But that's literally never happened one time.
00:17They have accents that I describe as birth control.
00:20One of my boys texted me saying I'm getting a $500 accent bonus.
00:25They're like cockroaches. They're going to keep coming at you until you kill them.
00:28Mikey has a lot of pressure on him, so he better step up.
00:31I joined Rough and Rowdy because of Frank.
00:33I need to fight for Frank. I don't like the Able Brothers.
00:35Look into Mikey Betts' eyes. It's going to be darkness.
00:39Nobody wants to be the guy who loses to an Able.
00:43They're characters. I don't know how else to put it. I mean, you guys know them.
00:47The Able Brothers always bring it!
00:49It does go to Zachary Able, the Assassin King.
00:52Oh, good left from Able!
00:53Oh, Able comes running out!
00:55The crowd is loving the action!
00:57What did I tell you? What did I tell you?
00:59Do you agree with the decision?
01:01I mean, I thought it was an early stop.
01:03Look at these warriors!
01:05I'm not even hurt, dude.
01:06I mean, no introduction needed, honestly.
01:19These ones are the slicing cucumbers.
01:22They're the big ones.
01:23Those ones right there will be the pickling ones.
01:26We'll make pickles out of them.
01:28We've got the dill growing there.
01:30So, whenever we make the pickles, we'll use the fresh dill.
01:33I've got one more thing I have to show you.
01:35It's the best crop. I found it over at Tractor Supply.
01:38They had two for ten gum.
01:40So, come on with me.
01:42Oh, these two are actually ready.
01:44Let's pull one out.
01:45We've got Four Loko Gold here.
01:47Four Loko is the best, guys.
01:49You've got to drink Four Loko Gold.
01:51Fourth of July party.
01:53This is all the Able Brothers were drinking.
01:56We run on Four Loko Gold.
01:58We've got another one here still on the vine.
02:01One for me, one for Mikey Betts, I guess.
02:04You know what? Fuck Mikey Betts.
02:06This one's going to my twin brother.
02:08I'd much rather hang out with him.
02:10Why I even got into gardening is just because
02:13the food at the grocery store just isn't good.
02:15Like, I don't want to go full conspiracy theory on you guys,
02:19but there's not a conspiracy theory I won't examine.
02:22How sick of the hock to a girl are you guys, dude?
02:25It felt like a CIA level push behind it,
02:28but I still believe we're on a globe and all,
02:31but there's definitely something about Antarctica
02:34that we don't, that they're trying to hide.
02:36Also, none of the meat at the grocery store is real.
02:39Abe Lincoln even referenced giant bones
02:42in a presidential address.
02:44At the World Fair, we had babies and incubators
02:47out on display.
02:49What the hell are they feeding us in grocery stores?
02:51And we, like, no wonder why everyone in America is obese.
02:54Also, we had orphan trains from New York City
02:57all throughout the Midwest.
02:59Where the fuck was this in my history class?
03:02Watching YouTube videos on my kitchen so far,
03:05you have to actually get out there and do it.
03:07And then up front, I got a second pumpkin patch.
03:10It's doing a little better, but the deers are still, uh,
03:13they're messing it up worse than I'm going to mess up Mikey Betts.
03:16You guys ask me how much I know about Mikey Betts.
03:19Not a damn thing.
03:21I've never fucking heard of that kid in my life.
03:49So the best part about this area compared to the house
03:52is, uh, I don't have to pick up their dog shit.
03:55It's a great place for shits.
03:57I'm Mikey Betts.
03:59I'm Frank the Tank's producer.
04:01I do his editing.
04:03I do his sales.
04:05I do marketing, et cetera, et cetera.
04:07And August 9th, I will be his champion.
04:09This morning, it was a little chaotic.
04:11We had the dogs going.
04:13Fucking police showed up at us.
04:15We were like, what the fuck?
04:17We had the dogs going.
04:19Fucking police showed up at the door.
04:21Asked for my name.
04:23Said it wasn't me.
04:25They still told me I had to pick up the dog shit
04:27in my own backyard, which is crazy.
04:29I didn't pick it up last night.
04:31Neighbors called.
04:33Rat neighbors.
04:35That's what they are.
04:37Rat neighbors.
04:39I know the neighbor too.
04:41I know which neighbor it was.
04:43And guess what?
04:46You look how big their shits are at first.
04:48They took away my pool card, but we're here.
04:50I joined Rough and Rowdy
04:52because of Frank.
04:54The Able Brothers don't like Frank.
04:56The fact that they're talking shit about Frank
04:58for no reason.
05:00I think Frank called him an unable brother,
05:02which is pretty funny.
05:04And if you can't take that as a joke,
05:06you're a fucking pussy.
05:08So like, hey, get off the car.
05:10What the fuck is wrong with you?
05:12It's not my fault they suck.
05:14He's changing his name to Owen.
05:16You know, Owen 1, Owen 2, Owen 3.
05:18Soon to be Owen 4.
05:20I gotta thank Jenks. Shout out Jenks.
05:22He planted the seed in my head
05:24that I should get into Rough and Rowdy.
05:26This is one of those times where you say
05:28only in Rough and Rowdy.
05:30I love it. I love the Able Brothers.
05:32They are true Rough and Rowdy stars.
05:34Frank the Tank has two champions tonight
05:36literally fighting for his honor
05:38just because he shits on these kids.
05:40Jenks taking this fight on short notice.
05:42Able's coming right out.
05:44Jenks throws his first punch at Jenks.
05:46Are we sure, Jenks?
05:48Oh!
05:50He absolutely nailed him
05:52with the right cross attack.
05:54Frank loves it.
05:56That was as clean a shot as you'll ever see.
05:58This is Able.
06:00Able is always entertaining one way or the other.
06:02His hair's a problem.
06:04Hair's a huge problem.
06:06He didn't think of this. He can't see.
06:08Oh!
06:10He couldn't go there.
06:12That's where the problem is, Jenks.
06:14He can't go there.
06:16He's out of control.
06:18Unbelievable.
06:20He couldn't be more feeble. Owen unable
06:22as he is now 0-5.
06:24If you fuck with Frank
06:26I'm coming for your ass.
06:28Lesson to be learned. Congratulations, Frank.
06:30Congratulations, Jenks. Back to you guys.
06:32Training has been good.
06:34The first two training sessions kicked my ass.
06:36I puked. I almost shit myself.
06:38Yeah, that's what you have to do.
06:40You have to step wide.
06:42You don't want to stumble over your own two feet.
06:44His feet are the feet
06:46he has to work on.
06:48Yeah, you're too stiff, Mikey.
06:50You're too stiff.
06:52Greased fucking lightning.
06:54You gotta be greased fucking lightning.
06:56Don't be feeble.
06:58Count on me, baby.
07:00Count on fucking me
07:02when it's time to go.
07:04Punch him.
07:07Walk home.
07:09Angrier.
07:11No pain.
07:13No pain.
07:22He's a doughboy.
07:37He's the only man
07:39in the Ables
07:41who can steal the thunder
07:43from the guy who sucked him.
07:45Yes.
07:47Yes.
07:49Yes.
07:51Yes.
07:53Yes.
07:55Yes.
07:57Yes.
07:59Yes.
08:01Yes.
08:03Yes.
08:05Yes.
08:07That's why I love him so much.
08:09The thing about the Abel brothers
08:11is that they will fight anybody
08:13at any time.
08:15I'm fighting Space Monkey.
08:17That's a fat kid whose body
08:19turns different colors of red.
08:21Abel normally is bleeding within the first 30 seconds
08:23and it doesn't affect him at all.
08:25He's the Mick Foley of Rough n' Rough.
08:27I'm fighting all these top man champs.
08:29Undefeated fighters.
08:31But if you don't know who we are
08:33We're just like two normal dudes who got into fighting later in life.
08:37Spencer's a mailman, I work for the TSA.
08:40We're going to avoid the barking dog because it's safety.
08:44The other day I got stung by a wasp, so that's why my hand's a little swollen.
08:48I got, yeah, yeah, yeah, and then I got the poison ivy I'm recovering from as well.
08:54So despite the heat, despite the poison ivy, despite the flying stinging insects, still
08:59rolling through the heat here.
09:01Oh, I made a little joke about them.
09:03I was watching them fight, and I can't call them the able brothers, they're the unable
09:07brothers, because they always lose, so I guess I didn't take too kindly to it, so they knocked
09:12off my hat.
09:13They're constantly asking Dave for money while in the ring, they're constantly looking to
09:17have cruises paid for.
09:20Get married this September, Dave, if you want to fucking throw me a sandals honeymoon, I'd
09:27take it, buddy.
09:28If we're twins, double dip, Dave, open up the checkpoint.
09:31You couldn't even make it in time for my fight, you at least owe me 500 for that.
09:35Double accent of the night bonus, I don't think that we've ever done that before.
09:38You guys see it when you come in here, it's like a working class town.
09:41This isn't like East Coast Metro, it's just the hard work and the everyday, the person
09:46punching the clock, scraping by to feed their kids, that's who we're putting on for, and
09:51that's who we're looking to bring home some wins for.
09:53Listen, he said it right, at the end he goes, the Ables train will steam along.
09:58Full steam ahead.
09:59They never stop.
10:00The thing about Able Brothers fans, they're not even fans of us, they're fans of themselves,
10:04because we represent self-belief and just always going out there against the odds and
10:10going hard.
10:15Not if I win, when I win, I'm going to find the closest Margaritaville and we're going
10:20to party.
10:21My pregnant wife, I'm going to force her to drink a daiquiri and we're going to have a
10:24great time, because I won.
10:25The Able Brothers are unlikable, they are, like, they just, you look at them, they look
10:29like rats.
10:30They look like big rats.
10:32Frank, I'm going to destroy your guy, this isn't going to be close.
10:36Mikey Betts is going to come in and the Ables are going to go down, because that's all that
10:41always happens, when the Ables fight, they lose.
10:44Like we're going to sit here and listen to some fat fucking 500 pound woman chirp at us.
10:50Frank hates the Ables, he wants to see the Ables dead.
10:53There's no way to fucking predict this.
10:55Both of these guys are terrible athletes, for all intents and purposes, both of these
10:59guys are terrible boxers.
11:01All jokes aside, it's a fucking fight, it's a brawl.
11:04You get hit in the wrong spot at the wrong time, bad shit can happen, that's the risk
11:07fighters take.
11:08I just, I want to destroy these Barstool guys, I don't respect them, I think they're pussies.
11:13Alright, I've got a minute each round just to fucking go ball to the wall on this guy
11:17and watch his head bounce.
11:19Mikey Betts has man boobs.
11:21Fuck you Zach Able, you little bitch.
11:23Fuck you, you got D-cup titties, you're fat as fuck.
11:26August 9th, rough and rowdy, I'm knocking Zach Able out.

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