Countdown | Wednesday 4th April 2018 | Episode 6798
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00This programme contains strong language and adult humour.
00:05If you're not comfortable with something, please leave a comment.
00:10This programme contains strong language and adult humour.
00:15If you're not comfortable with something, please leave a comment.
00:20APPLAUSE
00:31Good afternoon and welcome to the Countdown studio.
00:34Now, we Brits know a thing or two about weather.
00:38Bad weather can get in the way and stop us doing things that we really want to do.
00:42I was thinking of occasions, and I'm sure you've got some too,
00:45when actually bad weather did for us.
00:48One related to Countdown.
00:51I was overseas and I went to the airport and they said,
00:55we're very, very sorry, the flight's been cancelled due to very thick fog.
01:00I said, but this is very difficult.
01:03And they said, that's your problem, pal, nothing to do with us.
01:07And I had to make some harem-scarem taxi ride to a station to get a train,
01:12change the train in order to get here.
01:15And ever since then, if I'm ever away, I leave a day in the middle, just in case.
01:20Very sensible.
01:21Has weather ever got in the way of your plans?
01:24Well, it always seems like it's England, doesn't it,
01:26that gets things cancelled with a bit of drizzle and a bit of fog.
01:29Because I was in Canada over Christmas and we got to Vancouver
01:33and we were driving to Whistler and it's kind of minus eight degrees.
01:37Thick snowstorm and Pasha had managed to hire this,
01:40it was called a car, but it looked more like a bus.
01:42So we were going fine, but you get stuck behind people, you know,
01:45crawling along at ten miles an hour because they're probably English like us.
01:48But, you know, bombing along and there's snow everywhere
01:51and we were kind of, as I say, going past these people
01:54and they have signs everywhere, you must have snow tyres, you must have chains.
01:57And we were a little bit scared but still happy.
02:00And at 1am, minus eight degrees, pitch black,
02:03we passed someone on a bicycle, on the motorway, just cycling.
02:09In the pitch black. It was absolutely insane.
02:13I mean, we weren't sure where this person had escaped from.
02:16But Pasha's a Russian, I mean, he'll risk anything.
02:20They're extraordinary, aren't they?
02:22Most of the boys I was with actually were all Russian
02:24and used to kind of minus 40 degrees,
02:26but still they were a bit chilly over in Canada.
02:28I guess it's different kinds of cold, that's what they were saying anyway.
02:31I guess so. I guess so. Tough guys normally anyway.
02:34Rich, we've got George back with us, who just squeezed in last time in.
02:39Do you remember? Yeah.
02:41Crucial conundrum. Well done. Thank you.
02:43And that snatched it. Butcher's assistant from Bingley,
02:46three wins under your belt. Yeah.
02:48Well done. Now you're up against Danny.
02:50Danny Sarkissian, a supply teacher from Manchester and a poet.
02:55Well, I wouldn't describe myself as a poet, it's more of a sort of hobby.
02:59But it's something that I enjoy doing, sort of creative writing in general,
03:02so a bit of short stories.
03:05But, yeah, like the poetry is sort of spoken words stuff,
03:09so in pubs and bars.
03:12And you do this around Manchester?
03:14Well, yeah, yeah, I live in Manchester, so any pubs or any bars,
03:17usually after a pint or two, to calm the nerves.
03:20Well done. Big round of applause for George and Danny.
03:23APPLAUSE
03:27And over in the corner, Susie, as ever,
03:30joined once again by the wonderful Colin Murray, TV and radio presenter.
03:33Welcome back, Colin. Thank you.
03:35APPLAUSE
03:38Now, George, off we go. Good luck.
03:42Thanks, Nick. Afternoon, Rachel. Afternoon, George.
03:44Can I start with a consonant, please? Thank you. Start today with T.
03:48And a vowel? O.
03:51A consonant? K.
03:54A consonant? S.
03:57Vowel? A.
04:00Consonant? N.
04:04A vowel? E.
04:07Consonant? R.
04:12And a final vowel, please? And a final U.
04:15And here's the Countdown Clock.
04:42CLOCK TICKS
04:48Yes, George? Eight.
04:50Danny? Just a seven.
04:52Your seven? Rankest?
04:55Rankest. Outranks.
04:57Excellent. Yeah, both fine. Outranks, really good eight. Well done.
05:01APPLAUSE
05:05Now, Colin.
05:07I got a stonker for seven, but it was more of a stinker with outranks.
05:12So, yeah, S we could do as well.
05:14Thank you. Susie, anything else? Yeah, no, it's a good eight. Thank you.
05:18Eight points to George. Then, Danny, your letters game.
05:21Hi, Rachel. Hi, Danny. Have a consonant, please.
05:24Thank you, Danny. Start with S.
05:27Another? W.
05:30Vowel? E.
05:33Another vowel? I.
05:36Consonant? S.
05:39Consonant? L.
05:42Vowel?
05:45E.
05:47Consonant? R.
05:50And a final consonant, please?
05:53And a final W.
05:55Stand by.
06:06CLOCK TICKS
06:26Well done, Ian.
06:28Eight. Eight as well.
06:30To eight, Danny?
06:32Wireless. And? Same word, wireless.
06:35Two wirelesses. Yes, Colin?
06:38That was a home one for me, wasn't it, having wireless in there?
06:41Although these kids, they would be thinking wireless headphones,
06:44wireless speakers. I'm thinking the old wireless.
06:47Exactly.
06:49Susie, anything else?
06:51There's a seven there, resiles.
06:53To abandon a position or a course of action is to resile it.
06:56But wireless, yeah, was the best we could do.
06:58Thank you. Thanks, guys. 16 plays eight.
07:01George on 16. George, your numbers game.
07:04Have the usual, please, Rachel.
07:06Three from the top and three little.
07:08Been here long enough for a usual. Thank you, George.
07:10And this time they are one, another one.
07:14Oh, dear. Eight. And then the three big ones.
07:1650, 25 and 75.
07:19And we'll see if this is possible.
07:21883.
07:23883.
07:34883.
07:56Well, George?
07:58875, not written down.
08:00Danny? 875 as well.
08:021 plus 1 is 2.
08:041 plus 1, 2.
08:06Times 50 times 8 is 800.
08:08100 times 8, 800.
08:10And add 75. Yep. Eight away. Well done.
08:12And Danny?
08:14Just slightly differently.
08:16So 8 times 50.
08:188 times 50 is 400.
08:20Yeah, then 1 plus 1 is 2.
08:22So the same thing with a different order.
08:24Now, Rachel, 883. Can we crack this one?
08:27Actually, you can say 126 times 7 is 108.
08:31882, but 108 is the best for this one.
08:33Well done. Thank you.
08:35Thank you. 21 plays 13. Danny on 13.
08:38And it's time for our first Tea Time teaser,
08:41which is Pat on Bill.
08:43And the clue, even when it's outside the box,
08:46it's definitely a pen.
08:48Even when it's outside the box, it's definitely a pen.
08:58APPLAUSE
09:06Welcome back. I left with the clue.
09:08Even when it's outside the box, it's definitely a pen.
09:11And the answer to that one is ballpoint.
09:14Ballpoint.
09:16Now, if you'd like to become a Countdown contestant,
09:19you can email countdown at channel4.com
09:22to request an application form
09:24or write to us at contestantsapplicationscountdownleadsls31js.
09:32Now, 21 to 13, George in the lead. Danny, your letters game.
09:37Start with a consonant, please.
09:39Thank you, Danny.
09:41B
09:43Another.
09:45R
09:47And another.
09:49D
09:51Vowel.
09:53E
09:55Consonant.
09:57P
09:59Consonant.
10:01M
10:03Vowel.
10:05I
10:07And another vowel, please.
10:09And lastly, A.
10:11Stand by.
10:23T
10:45Yes, Danny? Eight.
10:47George? Eight as well.
10:49Danny? Impaired.
10:51They're both impaired.
10:53Excellent. Colin?
10:55Same word again. We get the points, too.
10:57Susie?
10:59Best we could do. Well done for suppressing it.
11:01Do not boil the soup as it may impair the flavour.
11:03Do you remember that? It was always on packets.
11:0529 to 21, George in the lead.
11:07George, you're back. Letters game.
11:09Thank you. Have a consonant, please, Rachel.
11:11Thank you, George. H
11:13And a vowel.
11:15I
11:17A consonant.
11:19R
11:21Consonant.
11:23V
11:25Vowel.
11:27E
11:29Consonant.
11:31D
11:33Vowel.
11:35I
11:37Consonant.
11:39R
11:41And a final vowel, please.
11:43And a final O.
11:45Countdown.
11:49O
11:51O
11:53O
11:55O
11:57O
11:59O
12:01O
12:03O
12:05O
12:07O
12:09O
12:11O
12:13Well, Danny?
12:15Just a six, that time.
12:17Danny? Driver.
12:19And same again?
12:21Driver.
12:23Two countdown players, all right. Colin?
12:25So we have a driver and we can throw horrid in there as well.
12:27Any more?
12:29Divier. If you're in a divy bar,
12:31it might be more sleazy than the next one, divier.
12:33That would give you another six, but no better than that.
12:35Could that apply to a footballer
12:37who dives a little bit more
12:39than another one?
12:41The Man United player's a little more divier
12:43than the Manchester City player.
12:45It works.
12:47Well done.
12:4935-27 in George's favour.
12:51It's Danny's numbers game.
12:53Yes, Danny?
12:55Let's go with one large and five little, please.
12:57Thank you, Danny.
12:59One from the top five little ones,
13:01and this time around the little ones are
13:03five, three, two, eight,
13:05and two.
13:07And the big one, 50.
13:09And the target, 234.
13:11234.
13:15CLOCK TICKS
13:17CLOCK TICKS
13:41Well, Danny?
13:43Yeah, 234.
13:45And George?
13:47234.
13:49Danny?
13:51So I did 50 x 5.
13:53250.
13:55And then 8 x 2.
13:5716.
13:59Well done.
14:01George?
14:03Once again, exactly the same.
14:05Yeah, yeah.
14:07Well done.
14:09APPLAUSE
14:1145-37.
14:13Well, Danny,
14:15thank you so much for that.
14:17We've got a couple of personal anecdotes
14:19about Northern Ireland,
14:21and this is a story very much about
14:23how kids' brains work rather than the troubles,
14:25but it's connected to that.
14:27I grew up during the Troubles,
14:29and everybody watching knows the divide that existed.
14:31But I started as a news journalist,
14:33believe it or not,
14:35before moving into music and sports,
14:37and I was sent to interview children
14:39who grew up on what we call an interface.
14:41It's Catholic, and it's weird.
14:43It can be four streets away, but you never mix,
14:45which is a huge problem.
14:47I think tribalism comes from a fear of the unknown.
14:49You know, when you grow up,
14:51in my personal opinion,
14:53your brain matures,
14:55you mix with all sorts of different people,
14:57and you realise the stupidity of it.
14:59But anyway, I go to interview these kids
15:01in the Loyalist area and in the Republican area.
15:03So I'm in the Loyalist area,
15:05and I've got these kids all round me,
15:07and I'm interviewing them.
15:09And I'm talking about how the fact...
15:11Well, they haven't met Catholic kids yet.
15:13And I said,
15:15well, you know, what's your view?
15:17And they all agreed.
15:19They said, oh, no, no, we don't like the ones
15:21from the other side.
15:23No, we don't like them.
15:25We don't trust them.
15:27No, we don't like them.
15:29And I said, OK, what music do you like?
15:31And they all went, Boyzone.
15:33We love Boyzone.
15:35And they all started singing,
15:37and I went, yeah.
15:39And I went, there's a huge likelihood
15:41that the band that you love
15:43are Catholic.
15:45And there was a stunned silence.
15:47And then one of them went,
15:49yeah, but they can sing.
15:51LAUGHTER
15:53APPLAUSE
15:55Very good.
15:5745-37.
15:59George in the lead, and it's your letters game.
16:01Thank you.
16:03Have a consonant, please, Rachel.
16:05C.
16:07A vowel.
16:09E.
16:11A consonant.
16:13T.
16:15Consonant.
16:17F.
16:19Vowel.
16:21E.
16:23Consonant.
16:25D.
16:27Vowel.
16:29O.
16:31Consonant.
16:33Bye-bye.
17:03Well, George?
17:05Seven. A seven, Danny.
17:07Just a six. Your six?
17:09Coated. Coated, yes.
17:11Defects. Yes. Very good.
17:13Can we beat it? Colin?
17:15No, we can match it. We've only sevens.
17:17I'd feasted. Mm-hm.
17:19You had a couple, didn't you?
17:21You could put the S in coated and have coasted.
17:23That would give you a seven as well.
17:25Thank you.
17:2752-37.
17:29Danny, your shot. Letters game.
17:31Can I have a consonant, please?
17:33Thank you, Danny. X.
17:35Another.
17:37T.
17:39A third.
17:41L.
17:43Vowel. O.
17:45Another vowel.
17:47E.
17:49Consonant.
17:51R.
17:53Another consonant.
17:55T.
17:57Vowel.
17:59And a final H.
18:01Stand by.
18:29MUSIC STOPS
18:33Well, Danny? Just a six.
18:35A six, George? A six.
18:37Danny? Toilet.
18:39And? Hotter.
18:41Hotter. Colin?
18:43I'm so delighted with this.
18:45I can only match with a six,
18:47but never before have I had such a great prop that I can use.
18:50If I could just go below the table...
18:52A hottie.
18:54Well done.
18:56Another word for a hot water bottle.
18:58Below the kind timed H.
19:00It's a spotty hottie, too.
19:02Yeah, it certainly is.
19:04Now then, Susie, what have we got?
19:06There's also triolet.
19:08That would get you to a seven.
19:10That's a poem of eight lines.
19:12The rhyming scheme recurs every third line.
19:14So, yeah, triolet for seven.
19:16Thank you. 58-43,
19:18and we plunge into the numbers game for George.
19:21I'll just go one large this time and five small, please.
19:24Away from the usual. Thank you, George.
19:27And this time they are...
19:35And the target...
19:399-9-2.
19:57MUSIC
20:10Well, George, 9-9-2.
20:129-9-2, Danny.
20:14Yeah, 9-9-2. Thanks, George.
20:162 divided by 2 is 1.
20:18Yep. 100 minus 1 is 99.
20:2199. Times 10 is 990.
20:24And then 9 minus 7 is another 2.
20:26And you haven't used any of those? Well done.
20:28Good done, Danny.
20:30100 times 10... 1000.
20:332 over 2 is 1. Yep.
20:35Add on the 7.
20:37B is your 8. Take it away.
20:39Lovely. 992. Well done.
20:43OK, now it's time for our second key time teaser,
20:46which is a goal down and the clue.
20:48They were only a goal down at half-time,
20:50but they let in lots more in the second period.
20:54They were only a goal down at half-time,
20:56but they let in lots more in the second period.
21:15Welcome back. I left with the clue.
21:17They were only a goal down at half-time,
21:19but they let in lots more in the second period.
21:23In fact, it was a wagonload they let in.
21:26Wagonload.
21:28So, 68-53, George in the lead, Danny.
21:33Here's a go, a letters game.
21:35Start with a consonant, please.
21:37Thank you, Danny. B.
21:39Another one?
21:41S.
21:43Vowel? E.
21:45Another vowel?
21:47O.
21:49Consonant? N.
21:51Another consonant?
21:53S.
21:55A third?
21:57N.
21:59A vowel?
22:01U.
22:03And a final consonant, please.
22:05And a final R.
22:07Here's the Countdown Clock.
22:21CLOCK TICKS
22:38Yes, Danny?
22:39Er, six.
22:41George? Er, stick with the five.
22:43And your five? Bones.
22:45Bones, Danny.
22:47Er, bonus?
22:49Thank you. And Colin?
22:51I had bones as well, inspired by Rag and Bone Man.
22:54Quite right. Susie, anything else?
22:56Er, neurons are there for a seven.
22:58And neurons. Thank you very much.
23:00Well done, Danny.
23:0259-68, George, your letters game.
23:06Can I have a consonant, please, Rachel?
23:08Thank you, George. M.
23:10And a vowel?
23:12E.
23:14A consonant?
23:16V.
23:19F.
23:21A vowel?
23:23U.
23:25Consonant?
23:27G.
23:29A vowel?
23:31O.
23:33A consonant?
23:35T.
23:37And a final consonant, please.
23:39And a final J.
23:41Standby.
23:43CLOCK TICKS
23:48CLOCK TICKS
24:08George?
24:10Just a five again.
24:12Five, Danny? Just a four.
24:14That four? Er, move.
24:16Vogue.
24:18And Vogue from George.
24:20Yeah, very good spot, that.
24:22Tough? Really tough.
24:24Any more? No, we were...
24:26Voguing. Voguing, that was it, yeah.
24:28That's it. Really difficult ones.
24:30Moving on. 73-59.
24:32Moving on, in fact, of course, to the wonderful Susie.
24:35What have you got for us today, Susie?
24:38Well, I had a lovely letter in from Natalia Lucas,
24:42who's been watching the show for a very long time,
24:44asking, why do we talk about knowing our onions?
24:48Which is just a very, very good question,
24:51and it's something that has puzzled etymologists
24:53for a very, very long time.
24:55But as always, when there's a bit of a mystery
24:57in English etymology,
24:59there's usually a great story that somehow emerges to explain it.
25:03And the great story attached to this one
25:05concerns a British lexicographer,
25:07and he was a grammarian as well,
25:09and he was called Mr Onions, C.T. Onions, as he was known,
25:12and he worked on the Oxford English Dictionary,
25:14but his best-known work
25:16is the Oxford Dictionary of English Etymology.
25:19And when I worked at Oxford University Press,
25:21I remember all the reprints would just say,
25:23we're printing onions.
25:25That was how we knew it, and we reprinted it often,
25:28because it was very, very popular.
25:30And the idea attached to this theory
25:32is that onions were so well regarded
25:34that he became the epitome, if you like,
25:36a byword for expertise.
25:38He was a very, very well-known expert.
25:40And if you knew your onions,
25:42i.e. the whole of English etymology,
25:44then you probably knew pretty much everything else as well.
25:47Sadly, as you will have guessed,
25:49there is no evidence to back this up,
25:51as brilliant as he was.
25:53It is all to do with a whole series of foodstuffs, actually,
25:57that somehow became attached to knowledge.
26:00So, over the years, we've known our oats,
26:03our apples, our eggs,
26:05and even our sweet potatoes.
26:08And onions simply came in the list.
26:10Quite why the two came together does remain a mystery.
26:13We're not completely sure.
26:15We were talking about bones earlier.
26:17There's another great story which is boning up on something.
26:20And again, that refers to, or is said to refer to,
26:23a notable figure, this time a translator and publisher,
26:26Henry George Bone, who published
26:28this great classical library of translated works.
26:30I think it was 766 volumes he published.
26:33Sold them to students, mass market, very, very cheap.
26:36And the idea was that if you boned up on something,
26:38you knew this vast amount of knowledge.
26:41Again, sadly, the evidence is lacking,
26:44and the idea is simply to do with polishing leather with bones,
26:47which was once the traditional way of buffing up your shoes.
26:49So, two people who we would love to think were involved
26:52in English etymology, and they were,
26:54but not quite in the way we expected.
26:56Thank you.
27:02Thanks, Susie, as ever.
27:04Now, Danny, your letters game.
27:06Start with a consonant, please.
27:08Thank you, Danny. T
27:10Vowel.
27:12A
27:14Consonant.
27:16Z
27:18Another consonant.
27:20N
27:22Vowel.
27:24O
27:26Another vowel.
27:28I
27:30Consonant.
27:32T
27:34And a final vowel, please.
27:36And a final E.
27:39And off we go again.
28:02MUSIC PLAYS
28:12Yes, Danny?
28:14Just a five.
28:16Five. George? Six.
28:18So, Danny?
28:20Zoned. And?
28:22Atoned. And atoned, indeed.
28:24Very nice. Colin?
28:26When I'm watching at home and letters come out like that,
28:29I get zoned and then zoned out.
28:31You know, that's one of those rhymes, isn't it?
28:33So I stopped after zoned, but it's your job to continue.
28:37You can take it one letter further to seven.
28:40Anodise is the good old countdown word
28:42to coat a metal with protective oxide layer.
28:45Yeah, anodise. Thank you.
28:4879-59, and it's George's letters game.
28:5220 points ahead. Yes, George?
28:54Can I have a consonant, please, Rachel?
28:56Thank you, George. N
28:58O
29:00Consonant.
29:02C
29:04Consonant.
29:06P
29:08Vowel.
29:10A
29:12Consonant.
29:14L
29:16Vowel.
29:18E
29:20A consonant.
29:22Y
29:24And a final consonant, please.
29:26MUSIC PLAYS
29:28MUSIC CONTINUES
29:55Well, George?
29:57Danny? Just a five.
29:59And that five? Place.
30:01Now, George? Canopy.
30:03Canopy, yes. Very nice.
30:05Can we match it? Colin?
30:07Yeah, we've got polenta. Have you tried polenta?
30:09Yes. It's all right, isn't it?
30:11It's OK. Yeah.
30:13Anything else, Susie? Potency is another seven.
30:15Yes. Potency.
30:17I like potency.
30:19Very good. 85-59.
30:21Danny, take care of the final numbers game, will you?
30:25Let's go with six more, please.
30:27Why not? Thank you, Danny. Six little ones to finish the day.
30:30And this challenge is...
30:32Four, ten, nine,
30:35another ten, six,
30:37and another nine.
30:39And the target to reach, 421.
30:41421.
30:43MUSIC PLAYS
30:55MUSIC CONTINUES
31:13Well, Danny?
31:15Er, 424.
31:17George? 421.
31:19Spoken with a firm voice. Yes.
31:22Ten times ten is 100.
31:24100, yep.
31:26Nine minus six is three.
31:28Times four...
31:30Oh, yeah, add that on, sorry.
31:32103.
31:34Times four is 412.
31:36And add on the other nine.
31:38Well done. 421. Lovely.
31:40Well done.
31:42So we go into the final round
31:44with a strong 95 to Danny's.
31:47Very creditable 59.
31:50So, fingers on buzzers, gentlemen.
31:52Let's roll today's Countdown Conundrum.
32:14Danny? Er, Fritted?
32:16Let's see whether you're right.
32:18Good man.
32:20APPLAUSE
32:22Well done.
32:2469, Danny. 69.
32:26Good score.
32:28To George's 95. Very good score.
32:30So, er,
32:32George takes the day, Danny.
32:34But you take the goodie bag back to, er,
32:36well, just across the, er...
32:38Not far to go. Not far to go.
32:40And good luck with the teaching.
32:42Good luck with the creative writing and the poetry too.
32:44Thank you. Thanks very much indeed for coming.
32:46Yeah, it's been lovely.
32:48All right.
32:50George. Nick.
32:52Another one. Not bad.
32:54See you next time. Well done indeed.
32:56Thanks. Fantastic.
32:58And you're coming back again.
33:00Of course you are, Susie too.
33:02Yeah.
33:04You were muttering something about limerick,
33:06but you're from the north,
33:08so what are you talking about when you talk about limericks?
33:10Oh, I love a limerick. Go on.
33:12And I was thinking about it because Danny's here,
33:14and, you know, so during the show,
33:16it's so easy.
33:18So I've just been writing them about various people.
33:20Susie, I've written a limerick about you,
33:22if you'd like to hear it. OK.
33:24This is just for you, Danny. It's not to your level, OK?
33:26I'm not going to get a deal off this.
33:28There's going to be no poetry books coming out.
33:30But here's my limerick about you.
33:32We all know a lady called Susie.
33:34When she finishes the show, she gets boozy.
33:36Back to the hotel,
33:38she often raises hell,
33:40but let it never be said she's a floozy.
33:42LAUGHTER
33:44Well done.
33:50Very good indeed.
33:52And absolutely spot-on, as well.
33:54LAUGHTER
33:56All right. We'll see you guys next time.
33:58And Rachel, too. See you next time.
34:00See you then. All right. Join us then.
34:02Same time, same place, you'll be sure of it.
34:04A very good afternoon.
34:06Contact us by email at countdown at channel4.com,
34:09by Twitter at c4countdown,
34:11or write to us at countdown, Leeds, LS3, 1JS.
34:15You can also find our web page at channel4.com,
34:18forward slash countdown.
34:24Last week, it was take-backs Mark Owen.
34:26This week, it's the turn of former England footballer Lee Dixon,
34:29along with his rescue dog in the Superbet tonight at eight.
34:32Next, though, St Lucia doesn't sound too bad, to be fair.
34:35Holiday home hunting in a place in the winter sun.
34:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE