John Rich | Barstool Rundown
Category
🥇
SportsTranscript
00:00The Rundown, Tuesday, July 16th, brought to you by Stella Blue Coffee.
00:08At Stella Blue Coffee, we believe good coffee is one of life's non-negotiables.
00:12It's time to stop drinking those boring, tasteless beans and turn to Stella Blue.
00:16Remember, your mornings are sacred.
00:18It's time to start treating them that way.
00:21Not only are Stella Blue Coffee's premium beans sourced from the most coffee-rich geographies
00:25on Earth, but they're also Big Cat-tasted and approved.
00:30Stella Blue Coffee's delicious roasts are available in cold brew, K-cups, ground, and
00:34whole bean formats to seamlessly fit into your morning coffee routine.
00:39And every bag sold helps save dogs.
00:43Enjoy the best deals of the year on Stella Blue Coffee right now during Amazon Prime
00:47Day by using the QR code on the screen.
00:50It's 20% off all Stella Blue Coffee products today and tomorrow, only on Amazon.
00:56Scan that QR code, save some dogs, drink some coffee.
00:59Everybody wins.
01:01First topic, we are hosting the Rundown on, what, there's two days a year that doesn't
01:06have professional sports, and today's one of them?
01:08Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, there are WNBA games still.
01:11You know what?
01:12I apologize.
01:13You're right.
01:14I apologize.
01:16The Home Run Derby was last night.
01:18Once again, they changed the format.
01:19Everybody complained about it online.
01:22But the real star of the show last night was Ingrid Andres, who sang the National Anthem.
01:28It was terrible.
01:29It was comparable to Fergie doing it before the NBA All-Star Game that got memed forever.
01:34I mean, she was just awful.
01:37And then just before we started filming the Rundown, she released a statement, and I'm
01:41a huge fan of hers now.
01:43I'm not going to bullshit y'all, I was drunk last night.
01:46I'm checking myself into a facility today to get the help I need.
01:50That was not me last night.
01:51I apologize to MLB, all the fans, and this country.
01:54I love so much for that rendition.
01:56I'll let y'all know how rehab is.
01:58I hear it's going to be super fun.
02:00Honestly, as good of a response as you could have had.
02:03I was ready to come on here and be like, we need to boot her out of this country.
02:06Like, you can't have that bad of a National Anthem.
02:08You called her a communist.
02:10I did call her a communist.
02:11I called her an anti-American communist who was set up to do a bad National Anthem.
02:16But if she's like, yeah, I was drunk.
02:17I need help.
02:18You can't.
02:19That's like whoever her PR person is.
02:20Oh, no, it's brilliant because everyone loves a comeback story.
02:23She automatically gets.
02:24Does it next year?
02:25Yeah.
02:26Oh, yeah.
02:27I get something.
02:28She's really smart.
02:29Yeah.
02:30We didn't know her name before last night, and then we automatically all said, well,
02:34the only thing I'll ever think of when I hear that name is that terrible National Anthem,
02:38and now she's our hero.
02:39It's like, everybody who, before you get on the big stage, you know, take a couple drinks,
02:43mellow out, took a little too far.
02:45It happens.
02:47I don't know.
02:48The first five years I worked here, I didn't do anything on camera without, you know, drinking
02:52first and smoking two cigarettes.
02:54And so I stand with her.
02:56What was the spelling bee?
02:57You took a shot back.
02:58Not a daiquiri.
02:59Bailey.
03:00This is not a daiquiri.
03:03Not a daiquiri.
03:04Not a daiquiri.
03:05This is not a daiquiri.
03:06It's not a daiquiri.
03:07Yeah.
03:08I think she could have stopped at, I was drunk.
03:09I don't think she needed to go the full, I'm going to rehab angle.
03:13But if, if she is actually troubled, then great that she's going to rehab.
03:18If it's like her manager was like tossing the rehab thing.
03:21I don't know.
03:22The last sentence kind of makes it, he, she, he could have, she could have stopped.
03:25I apologize to that MLB and all the fans in this country.
03:27I love that it's loved so much for that rendition, but she decided to say, I'll let you all know
03:31how rehab is.
03:32I kind of like that.
03:33But putting a y'all in a statement that you're going to rehab, it plays.
03:38She rocks.
03:40A lot of people that, if she was just like, I was drunk, they would have been like, that's
03:43even worse.
03:44Like, we're like, oh, that's cool.
03:45That's relatable.
03:46But like a lot of people would have been like, well, then that's even worse.
03:49It's rock and roll, baby.
03:50It's rock and roll.
03:51But now that she's like, oh, I was drunk and I'm going for hell.
03:53I think it's the perfect, I mean, I believe she's really.
03:57And also anybody watching that or there last night, it was 20 hours long.
04:02You had to throw some back responsibly to make sure you got through it.
04:06That product.
04:07It's terrible.
04:08It's on the level of the dunk contest.
04:09Yeah.
04:10So she's going to rehab.
04:11So she'll be out in what?
04:12Five to seven days.
04:13And then she'll be able to do her next gig.
04:16She probably won't miss anything.
04:17The All-Star game is tonight at Globe Field.
04:22Paul Skeen starting for the NL.
04:24First rookie to start the All-Star game since Hideo Nomo in 95.
04:27And Smitty, three of your scumbag fillies in the All-Star game.
04:32Do you put any merit into that?
04:33I mean, I guess you do because you don't win World Series.
04:36So you just count All-Star games?
04:39Uh, no.
04:42I'm not.
04:43I mean, you're wearing a Philly shirt.
04:44I am.
04:45I'm supporting my guy, Alex Holmes.
04:46So you do care.
04:47I put tacos.
04:48Okay.
04:49I care.
04:50And the fact that good teams should be recognized and the Phillies have the most All-Stars tied
04:56all time with eight and the most pitchers in five.
04:59A lot.
05:00Yeah.
05:01Including three starters.
05:02So if you would like to correlate stuff like, oh, the Phillies are plus 500 right now on
05:06the DraftKings Sportsbook with eight All-Stars and five pitchers, a record, maybe those odds
05:12won't be getting any better or juicier.
05:15Will you guarantee a World Series?
05:16I will not.
05:17But Dave Portnoy, the best big game hunting gambler in the world at the moment, placed,
05:24what was it?
05:25200,000?
05:26250,000 on the Phillies to win the World Series?
05:29At plus 600?
05:30And he does foresee great things as the odds are plus 500 now and only going down.
05:37So it only means good things.
05:40You just need everybody to get out tonight healthy.
05:41That's all I ask.
05:42Wait.
05:43So back to home run derby quick.
05:44Do you think they should go back to the 10 ounce?
05:46Yes.
05:47Yes.
05:48100%.
05:49Frankie, we did it right.
05:50Right.
05:51I mean, let's not pretend like Frankie is the only person in the world.
05:52No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
05:53It is.
05:54It is a pretty ubiquitous thought.
05:56But number one, it brings more drama because the best part of the home run derby last night
06:01was the final three.
06:02It was the final.
06:03By far.
06:04And people just want to see dingers.
06:05People want to see McGuire launch them over the green monster and Griffey hit the Camden
06:10Yards fucking warehouse in right field.
06:13Nobody wants to see how many Alec Boehm can slap over the left field fence.
06:19It's gone from like every home run being its own thing to just like how many can they slap
06:23out.
06:24Exactly.
06:26So my suggestion is, because then people are like, well, go back to 10 ounce, you're going
06:27to get a bunch of guys taking pitches again.
06:30Just do like 27 pitches, 25 pitches.
06:34And you could take them if you want.
06:35I think the pitch thing got a little over exaggerated.
06:38Yeah.
06:39People were sitting there waiting for the best, but 10 ounce is still more exciting.
06:4210 ounce with 30 pitches.
06:43Also that's part of the strategy.
06:45Get a good pitcher.
06:46Yeah.
06:47Yeah.
06:48You know.
06:49I think it's a fun storyline when the pitcher sucks.
06:50Yeah.
06:51I do too.
06:52Yeah.
06:53Fair enough.
06:54So yeah.
06:56Yeah.
06:57Yeah.
06:58Yeah.
06:59Yeah.
07:00Yeah.
07:01Yeah.
07:02Yeah.
07:03Yeah.
07:04Yeah.
07:05Yeah.
07:06Yeah.
07:07Yeah.
07:08Yeah.
07:09Yeah.
07:10Yeah.
07:11Yeah.
07:12Yeah.
07:13Yeah.
07:14Yeah.
07:15Yeah.
07:16Yeah.
07:17Yeah.
07:18Yeah.
07:19Yeah.
07:20Yeah.
07:21Yeah.
07:22Yeah.
07:23Yeah.
07:24Yeah.
07:25Yeah.
07:26Yeah.
07:27See.
07:28That was a big part of it, because I was a Yankees fan now, but
07:29they, they rejected me.
07:30And since they rejected me, the Yankees are the worst team in baseball.
07:32I mean, we just don't respond.
07:33I think it's funnier when we don't respond.
07:35You could end this curse at any time.
07:36I can't believe we'll get through it for Soto again.
07:38Volpy, omg Soto!
07:39Let's win 2 today boys!
07:41Can't ask for much more from Clark Schmitt.
07:44Boon setting the tone.
07:45Where are the bats?
07:46Let's get some runs.
07:47Yeah.
07:48Boom, that's how you get out of a jam.
07:49They do always make me laugh.
07:51Schmidt on the Bump, SneakySighYoungDark
07:53Alright, so what do you appreciate more, that or my random Yankees text?
07:59Nate, yours don't even-
08:00But no, Schmitty, they were-
08:01He might not even make any sense!
08:02Charlie Hayes
08:03They rejected me
08:04It was for the Yankees, was he not?
08:06He was. Caught the final out.
08:07So are you gonna end the curse, and-
08:10Well, how would we end the curse?
08:11You'd probably bring me to a Yankees game.
08:13Hahaha
08:15We'll start- how about we start using the group chat?
08:17Okay
08:17I'll start responding
08:18You can end the curse at any time. You do know this is your fault.
08:21I'll send a text before the game-
08:22Worst team in baseball said they rejected me.
08:25Uh, I'll- before the game Friday, I'll send a good- good luck, so-
08:28Okay
08:29Hahaha
08:30Okay
08:31PatBev, uh, has signed a new contract, not in the NBA. I- I wish we-
08:37Well technically, PatBev and Roan
08:38Yeah, I was- I wish we'd get Roan on the horn, but I think he's getting his passport updated
08:42cause he's gonna be living in Tel Aviv, uh, next year, I suppose. Uh, PatBev tweeted-
08:49Breaking! PatBev is headed to Europe!
08:51Uh, close.
08:52They gave me everything I asked for. I couldn't refuse.
08:55He plans to sign with, I don't know, Hopel? Hop- Hop- Hopoel?
08:59Hopoel
09:00Tel Aviv, uh, they're a- they're a basketball club who plays in the Israeli Premier League.
09:06So, yeah, I- it was- we already saw very little of Roan during the regular season.
09:11He was flying, you know, LA to Milwaukee to Atlanta, everywhere Pat went, Roan would go to
09:16tape the podcast. I don't know what happens now.
09:20Yeah, I imagine, I mean, two-hour flight to Milwaukee every week,
09:22a little different than a, I don't know, 12-hour flight to Israel or whatever.
09:26I would say Milwaukee and Israel, uh, aren't the same.
09:29So, uh, I don't think we'll see Roan there, but Mike Wallace and Tyler Miller,
09:34they're the producers, they may actually move to Tel Aviv. Uh, yeah, I mean, look,
09:38it is a way to get storylines if PatBev felt like he wasn't gonna play a lot of minutes with,
09:43like, I don't know, fucking Pistons or something. Like, he's gonna be
09:46the star of the Israeli Premier League.
09:48He could have signed a vet min, I guess, in a few places,
09:52or take a lucrative deal in Europe or Israel. Um, and I guess he went with the latter.
09:58You know, money is- money's sick. I- you can never hate on someone for taking a bag.
10:03I- I don't know where this leaves Roan. I mean, Zoom obviously works great,
10:08time zones are a bitch.
10:09Like, should I call Roan?
10:09Oh, I- oh, yeah, sure.
10:12Give Roan a call.
10:13It would be nice to see PatBev boots on the ground worldwide.
10:17Yeah, I- I think it's cool. I just- RoanieBoyThePrince, uh,
10:21the bar mitzvah's gonna go crazy.
10:23Yeah. I mean, he also could always, like, sign mid-season.
10:28Yeah, of course. That does happen often as well.
10:30You just sign with a contender after the off-start break.
10:33Congratulations, Pat. Always nice to sign a new contract.
10:37It stinks to not have him around as much. Like, you know, he would always pop in.
10:40Yeah, it would have been nice if he signed with the Knicks.
10:42Yeah, Knicks.
10:42Or go back to the Sixers.
10:44Sixers. Anywhere in this area.
10:45Really anywhere in the continental states of United States of America.
10:49So, PatBev signed with Israel, DoubleBotKadon signed again with Barstool.
10:52Yeah, congrats to Kelly Keegs as well.
10:54Kelly Keegs.
10:56Which contract do you think was more?
10:58Ooh.
10:59Well, PatBev or the other two combined.
11:03Times 20.
11:04PatBev.
11:04Yeah, maybe.
11:06The biggest news, I guess, of the last decade for college football fans is
11:10CollegeFootball25 dropped yesterday the video game.
11:13I know John Rich went to Best Buy and bought a system.
11:17GameStop.
11:17GameStop.
11:18Oh, GME. Shout out.
11:21I saw Brandon was tweeting a lot about it.
11:22Nicky Smokes has not slept.
11:24He's just dumping sack and playing NCAA basketball.
11:29It seems like this game is taking over my Twitter feed.
11:33Smitty, you're Barstool Game Time.
11:34Do you have a review for us, video game guy?
11:37No.
11:38No, nothing?
11:38No, no.
11:39This isn't 2020 anymore.
11:41John Rich, do you have a review for us?
11:44Yeah, it was good.
11:45I played one game.
11:47It was hard.
11:48Bowling Green got their ass kicked by Kennesaw State.
11:50Is it true that you can't stop the run?
11:51Like, it's impossible to stop the run.
11:53Brandon Walker was saying-
11:53No, I had a worse time stopping the pass than the run.
11:56Okay.
11:57Personally.
11:58Yeah.
12:00Madden is the only video game I've probably played in like 13 years.
12:04But I'm thinking about, I mean, I'd have to buy an Xbox for it.
12:07But I do love, like, to me, I mean, because even when I used to play Madden,
12:11I would make storylines in my head.
12:12I like that you get to play these storylines of the players, DMing the players,
12:16that you get after your girlfriend breaks up with you.
12:17The screenshots of the DMs are, like, I can't tell which ones are real or fake.
12:22Because they're so, they're like, should I get your ex-girlfriend's phone number?
12:27Yes or no?
12:29I don't truly understand the dynamics of the recruiting process in this game.
12:35It is fun because this is the first game in a long, long time that I think is combining
12:42kind of old school gamers who grew up with this stuff and new gamers.
12:48I saw one guy screenshotted that he got a five-star recruit,
12:51but he had to also bring in his, like, two-star brother with him.
12:56And it's realistic.
12:57And, like, I don't know if it's real or not.
12:59I just saw, like, it's all on my timeline, kept going.
13:01But it seems like there's a lot of, like, random cool stuff like that involved in the game.
13:07I saw a kicker.
13:08Kicking on the road looks impossible.
13:10Your whole screen's just shaking and going nuts.
13:13Yeah, kicking's a little hard to get used to.
13:15It was going, the meter's going, like, a million miles.
13:17So the kicking's way too easy, I think.
13:19Usually.
13:20It's just, zoop, zoop.
13:20Yeah, but I think it's a good...
13:22Yeah.
13:22Plus, college kickers are bad in general, so it makes that realistic.
13:27People seem to love the game.
13:28I, you know, I played it, like, you know, freshman year of college.
13:32Tommy, you were probably in diapers, 2006?
13:35I was 10.
13:36You were 10?
13:37Yeah.
13:37So you were still in diapers.
13:38Yeah.
13:38And Smitty, you were...
13:40Still in diapers.
13:41Still in diapers, yeah.
13:42Kind of.
13:43No, we had a league in college, and it was great until somebody got a little piss poor
13:50and just deleted the entire season.
13:53That seems like a college thing to do.
13:54It's the worst.
13:56So, yeah, I'm not going to buy it.
13:58I'm not going to buy it.
13:58I don't have a video game system, but it seems like it would be fun to play.
14:02We have the gaming room still, so maybe I'll hop in there, play the Travi.
14:05Brownie James, summer league.
14:07Actually, one of my favorite stories right now, because he's taken 55th overall.
14:12Everybody knows it's only because of LeBron, but also, like, the 55th overall pick doesn't
14:16really ever pan out anyway, so it doesn't really matter.
14:19Brownie's trash.
14:21That yoke is really just...
14:23He wasn't 55th.
14:25He's 7 for 31 from the field, but a very impressive 0 for 15 from 3.
14:31There's a clip of, is it Jalen Brown?
14:35Jalen Brown having a chit chat on the court yesterday saying Brownie can't play in the
14:39league, and then Jalen also, like, quote tweeted it this morning, like, hope he works hard
14:44and is determined and goes get him, Tiger.
14:46It was a big backtrack.
14:49Yeah, I mean, to be fair, like, this was like a private combo.
14:53Like, he's talking on camera in the front row to Angel Reese saying Brownie can't play.
15:00He's shooting the shit.
15:02Yeah, you're not gonna hold him for telling the truth when he knows he's not mic'd up.
15:06I was on Brownie's side.
15:07I was like, look, I kind of feel bad for this kid.
15:09It's not his fault.
15:09Like, it's not his fault that he got drafted and, like, has been put in this position.
15:13He was, like, a top-ish high school.
15:15He was a four-star.
15:16Yeah, he had a cardiac arrest.
15:17Like, he's got time to bounce back.
15:19He's making it a little tough.
15:200 for 15 from 3 to start.
15:22I think at this point, it's just got to be, like, you get him into a game with LeBron on, like,
15:26day one, have him fucking, I don't know, do an alley-oop to each other or some shit,
15:30and then he probably never plays the rest of the year.
15:32We got to find the clip now.
15:33Or goes to the G League.
15:34We got to find the clip now from Verdansk five years ago.
15:37Brownie's squad rolled up on me and White Sox Dave.
15:40Didn't work out so hot.
15:42What?
15:42Yeah, he didn't win a Call of Duty competition.
15:44Oh, yeah, so then Brownie's quote, I feel like I'm just in a little slump right now,
15:49cracked me up.
15:50Like, yeah, you're 0 for 15 from 3, dude.
15:51I think you're in a little slump.
15:53But then he won a Call of Duty tournament at Summer League.
15:5510K.
15:5510K.
15:5610K, it's 10K, baby.
15:57Yeah.
15:58Championship felt.
15:59So Brownie will make the Lakers.
16:01He will play, you know, this season in LA because LeBron's there.
16:06I think it's fine.
16:08I'm with you, like, whatever.
16:1012th guy off the bench, Brownie or someone else, which it really matter.
16:13Yeah, I mean, if he gets a point where he's playing, like, 20 minutes a night for the
16:17Lakers, then that's probably an issue.
16:19But he's just going to get in for, like, blow out.
16:22He's going to be basically a manager, like a college team.
16:25And coming out of high school, like people said, like, he is a NBA prospect.
16:29He just needs time to develop and put on weight and get better at shooting, etc.
16:33It's just LeBron wants to play with his kid.
16:35And I do think LeBron, you know, there's a few people who have played who get to do that.
16:41LeBron's one of them.
16:42Yeah, I feel like this is like me getting drafted.
16:45Like, this is like a legit basketball player.
16:48Correct.
16:48It's not Tommy Smokes.
16:49It's LeBron James's son.
16:50I'm saying it's not like we make it out of that genre.
16:52It's not Tommy.
16:53Yeah.
16:53Can we get a confirmation of that?
16:56Here's a story.
16:58Skip Bayless is leaving FS1.
17:00New York Post, very credible, reported that Skip Bayless is leaving undisputed on FS1
17:05this summer.
17:06He's been there for eight years.
17:09You know, he does the show with Shannon Sharp.
17:11They yell nonsense at each other anymore.
17:13Used to do the show.
17:14Sorry, he used to.
17:15Not anymore.
17:16They hated each other.
17:17And then Skip, Skip's like the king of Twitter.
17:20He just, he'll always find the angle that you didn't even think could exist.
17:24You know what's very funny is, to tie by last topic, he's very pro-Bronny.
17:28Yes.
17:28Like he was the biggest LeBron hater of all time.
17:30He's like so pro-Bronny James.
17:32Yes.
17:33No, he's the king.
17:36If he's not on FS1, like he'll, I'm sure he makes enough money only from the blue check
17:41mark on Twitter with his takes that he'll be just fine.
17:44So who won?
17:45It looks like Stephen A. Smith won then, huh?
17:48Yeah.
17:48I mean, yes.
17:50It's not close.
17:50Stephen A. Smith.
17:52Bronny won the Summer League College UD tournament.
17:54What does that tell you about him?
17:56Even this next one.
17:57Just shot a corner open three.
17:58Shot it with conviction.
17:59Hit nothing but net.
18:00Barely touched bottom of net.
18:01Now 0 for 14.
18:03Didn't score.
18:03Pulling for him.
18:04Sweating for him.
18:05He will snap out of this.
18:06Yeah.
18:07Yeah.
18:07No, Skip.
18:08By the way, it says Bronny may have a bigger clutch gene than LeBron.
18:14I mean, that's incredible.
18:16Like, I don't know how he comes up with this stuff.
18:20Yeah.
18:20He's so good.
18:21No, it's not good.
18:22It's pointless.
18:22Made up of the right stuff.
18:24You didn't see through it, though?
18:25Like, of course we did, but it's so funny.
18:27But it's not, though.
18:28It's the same.
18:29Bronny has a better clutch gene than LeBron is objectively hilarious.
18:33It's so absurd, like the absurdity level.
18:36Yes, but you could never think to type that out and hit send.
18:39Only he can.
18:40Nobody else is that brilliant.
18:42It's not to do with conviction.
18:45It is what he is.
18:46And it's what he has been for the past 20 years.
18:48And that's not fatiguing to you.
18:52No, that became tiresome to me about 10 years.
18:56But how do you get actually angry about Skip Bayless?
18:59I don't, but that's why.
19:01Not you, but people who actually let Skip Bayless affect their mood.
19:05It's like, change the channel.
19:07I don't know.
19:08I think he's just a fun.
19:09I would just love to see him and Stephen A reunite somehow.
19:12They will.
19:12I think they have to now.
19:13If Mike and Mad Dog did, they will, too.
19:14Because they didn't really leave on bad terms.
19:17I'm probably not.
19:18It's just Stephen A's ESPN.
19:22Stephen A runs ESPN.
19:23Yeah, there's no objectivity in ESPN anymore.
19:26Just Stephen A.
19:27Stephen A and Scott Van Pelt.
19:30On that midnight, though.
19:31Yeah, I mean, if all he has to do is start screaming at the TV.
19:38It's pretty fucked up what SVP does to the Mets, though.
19:41Makes them lose.
19:42Yeah, it's true.
19:46Let's see.
19:46After show, it says Nate Smitty World Series of Poker.
19:50We can talk about that a little bit.
19:52Yeah, it's your first public appearance back.
19:54Well, he was on Wake Up Mintsy today.
19:56Yeah, I'm sorry.
19:57I did 45 minutes on Wake Up Mintsy this morning.
20:0145 minutes?
20:03It might have been two and a half hours.
20:04It went on.
20:05So I saw you're now on the charts for all time earnings.
20:10Well, there's a website that just tracks earnings.
20:12But that was more of a joke.
20:13And I love that people like, because Dave said I was parading around after I finished 717.
20:17So I paraded being 46,000 salvants.
20:21I don't know that word on the all time money list.
20:23And people are like, oh, I thought you're not throwing a parade.
20:25I'm like, yeah, it's 46,000, dude.
20:27Like, no.
20:27Well, you turned down $100 million.
20:29Oh, yeah.
20:31When Jalen Brunson turned down $100 million, all I did was tweet.
20:34I turned down $100 million from Barstool Sports.
20:37People took that as gospel.
20:38You earned $100 million from Poker Go to stay in Barstool.
20:42I was like, how do these people, like, breathe?
20:45I just don't understand how people think I turned down $100 million.
20:48So you think Nate's officially a better player than you now?
20:51Than me?
20:52Yeah.
20:53Depends on what we're playing.
20:56I think Nate's obviously poker.
20:59Depends.
21:00Depends the stakes.
21:02Depends.
21:02Depends the game.
21:04Depends.
21:05It was a great experience.
21:06Cash.
21:08Nate, I think Nate, me, Nate, and Mincey are on, like, kind of virtually the same level
21:14compared to pros and then compared to, like, Dave.
21:16Right, right.
21:16Like, any one of us could beat anybody else at any time.
21:20We're above Dave, but we're below all the wizards at the World Series of Poker.
21:23What would be your scouting report on each other?
21:25Strengths and weaknesses.
21:28Like, if we played each other heads up, like, deep stack.
21:31Like, if me, him, and Dave played each other, I would go in thinking
21:36he would, he's an aggressor.
21:40He fires.
21:42Smitty's more patient than I am.
21:44I'm more aggressive.
21:44I think aggressive players generally make more money in poker.
21:50But no, no, it's not a knock to him.
21:51He's naturally more patient.
21:52I'm naturally more aggressive.
21:54It's, like, just a natural feel.
21:56Well, that'd be better for big tournaments, and he's probably better for, like, cash games.
21:58It's situational.
21:59Yeah, it's hard to say.
22:00But no, just to wrap, put a bow on it.
22:03It was awesome to cash.
22:04Obviously, I've always wanted to do exactly that.
22:06I did it.
22:07So it's, like, cool to be able to say that I've cashed the main event.
22:11I'm not, you know, thrilled with 7-17.
22:14I kind of would like to make more money and go deeper and all that stuff.
22:18I don't think I played great.
22:20You're never going to sit out another year, right?
22:21No, that was stupid to do, or almost did.
22:26Yeah, it went really well.
22:27Like, the whole storyline of Ben Mintz wanting to go to this sphere,
22:30so busting the main event, and then Big Cat having to, like,
22:33call me up and be like, can you go play?
22:35It all just worked so perfectly.
22:37It's hard to, you know, think that you could, like,
22:40write something better than how it worked out besides me going further, I guess.
22:44But yeah, it was cool.
22:45Waiting for Dave to set up the heads up 10 years in the making.
22:49It's good.
22:49I also have, like, more money now to play him with.
22:52So 20k heads up whenever Dave decides he wants to play me.
22:56I've said I should-
22:57What would you put your winning chances at?
23:00Like, I should destroy him.
23:02Like, my skill level to his, I compared it-
23:05Don't you think there's a chance he just gets, like, pocket aces?
23:07That's the thing.
23:07That can always happen.
23:08He can get aces versus my kings and just, like, win.
23:11Or he can get kings versus my aces and flop a king and win.
23:13If he wins, it won't be skill based.
23:15It'll be pure luck like that.
23:19My skill level to him, I compared it to, like,
23:21you can sit at a chess board and play versus someone who knows how to play chess.
23:26Dave calls them horses and castles.
23:28Like, that's about his skill level.
23:30A way worse chess player will never beat a better chess player.
23:34Poker is, like, a little out of your control.
23:37Dave has an 8% chance of winning.
23:39No, I think he has.
23:40Depending on what the game is.
23:42What do you mean, what the game is?
23:45Like, if you guys are just playing one sit-and-go that is 10 big blinds deep,
23:50he absolutely has, I would say it's 50-50.
23:54I assume we will have a normal structure and it'll be a deeper stack.
23:58Okay, well, the deeper the game is, the more advantages to you.
24:02But, I mean, Dave still has an ample amount of opportunity and chance
24:08based on variance alone.
24:09I'd say it's 55-45.
24:11Like, that's how close it is.
24:13I would say minimum 70-30 me.
24:16You just have that goes up from eight.
24:21In one game, it's like 70-30 me over the span of, like, a lifetime of playing him.
24:27I should win 92% of the game.
24:28Yeah, over a lifetime.
24:29But Dave's not going to sit there and play 10,000 ants.
24:31Okay, sure.
24:32That's just what it, I mean, that's what it is.
24:34That's what variance is.
24:35So, I don't know if we'll ever play.
24:37And it is funny because Dave, he played a lot.
24:39He said on the Barstool documentary, he used to play, like, party poker for, like,
24:43getting, like, $10 of, like, lunch money or whatever.
24:48Dave playing party poker in 2002, whether he was successful or not,
24:52that is, like, that's like playing Pong compared to playing NCAA 2014.
24:58Any one of us can go back to 2002 party poker right now with the knowledge that we have
25:03and be a millionaire.
25:04Billionaire, yeah.
25:05Yeah, billionaire.
25:05It's just a completely different game.
25:08Is it, like, better strategies evolved?
25:10Yeah, better strategies.
25:11There's GTO, which means that basically AI has invented the perfect way to play
25:16and people can study that.
25:17And you have wizards who are, like, on your level of intelligence a little bit.
25:22And just go in and just memorize every trick.
25:24Is that an autism thing?
25:25No, it's intelligence.
25:27You didn't accuse yourself of that for an irony.
25:29Because I'm not on that level.
25:31Just trillions and trillions of scenarios to automatically play perfectly.
25:34Just play the op, like a blackjack, basically.
25:37Pretty much.
25:37And Dave got lost at sea.
25:40All right, Captain Dave checking in.
25:44Man talking through east, 30 miles out to sea, Boston.
25:48You boys almost lost Captain Dave today.
25:53Captain Dave almost was lost to the ocean.
25:57Unfortunately, he was saved.
25:58I don't have much on that.
25:59Come on, you're happy he was saved.
26:01No, it's good that he's safe.
26:03The Gilligan's Island meme.
26:04Pretty funny.
26:06Yeah, it's scary that, like, he's just, like, driving a boat himself.
26:11I feel like he said he's never going to do that.
26:12I would be petrified.
26:13I'm not even driving a highway.
26:14But yeah, like, a boat at sea, I feel like.
26:17Yeah, do not.
26:18We got to get him a crew.
26:20I thought Austin would be, like, a lifeguard for him.
26:23Yeah, Austin's, like, right now, Austin is in boating school.
26:28It would not shock me at all.
26:30Do you need a license to do a boat?
26:32Oh, yeah.
26:33You do?
26:33Yeah, you need a boating license.
26:34I have no idea.
26:36Well, I don't know.
26:37I don't know if a various state...
26:38Imagine if we lost Mr. Portnoy.
26:41If you own the largest piece of property in Massachusetts history,
26:46you could probably own your own boat and take it out.
26:49They'll probably look the other way.
26:51And what?
26:54Oh, I was going to say, there's an update to Nikki Smokes's cavity tweet from last week.
26:59It is a top five tweet, I think, where Nikki Smokes goes,
27:02went to the dentist, have nine cavities and need four wisdom teeth pulled.
27:07I'll never go back to the dentist.
27:08As if he's blaming the dentist for the reason he has nine cavities.
27:13Update, he went to another dentist, got a second opinion.
27:16Only three cavities.
27:18You got to go to the dentist once a year.
27:19I know twice a year is what they say.
27:21That feels like a little much.
27:22Once a year, once every nine months.
27:24I like going.
27:25Like, I like when they...
27:25Oh, are you screaming?
27:26I like when they get, like, the shit out...
27:28I don't know.
27:29I like after, but in it is torture.
27:31Yeah, it's like a relieving feeling.
27:33Yeah.
27:34I don't mind it.
27:35I have the most active saliva glance in history.
27:38I'm, like, hitting a dentist.
27:41So, I don't know.
27:42That's the Nikki Smokes update.
27:44John Richard, did we miss anything?
27:46Dante's here.
27:48Dante, you got any takes?
27:50Yeah, what are you talking about?
27:52Whatever you want.
27:53All right, well, the Dante minute.
27:55Come on.
27:56Can we...
27:56Dante, what's the biggest problem we're facing as humanity right now?
28:00We got to time it.
28:01What's the biggest problem, what?
28:02Humanity is facing right now.
28:03One.
28:04One problem humanity is facing right now.
28:06Dante, we don't want to get canceled.
28:08So, you got one minute to get camera.
28:10Oh, this isn't live either.
28:11Get all your takes.
28:12Fire away.
28:13Five, four, three, two, one.
28:15Takes, go!
28:16I have no idea what we're talking about.
28:18The Homerun Derby sucked last night.
28:20Oh, we don't...
28:21Let's talk inside jobs.
28:24All right, let's talk.
28:25You got 50 seconds, go.
28:26What do you want me to say?
28:27What's the one problem that humanity has right now that needs to be fixed?
28:30You guys are hitting me with, like, too many angles.
28:32Are we talking about the assassination attempt?
28:36How did he get on that roof?
28:37Dude, that's what I'm wondering.
28:38You couldn't even climb onto the United Center.
28:41Listen to me.
28:41He didn't go to the sofa.
28:42I had a long conversation with Billy this morning about this.
28:45Oh, good.
28:46You've been on corrugated steel before?
28:48Or aluminum?
28:49Whatever it is.
28:50Corrugated roof.
28:51You know what that is, right?
28:53You know, like, you drive by, like, a chicken coop?
28:56Okay.
28:56What's on that roof?
28:57Yeah, of course.
28:58You know how flimsy that is?
28:59Flimsy as hell, yeah.
28:59How loud it is?
29:00Yep, boom, boom, boom.
29:01If a pebble is rolling around up there, you're hearing it?
29:04Yep.
29:05Never mind the Secret Service was stationed in there.
29:09That was their setup.
29:11Somebody's up there crawling around, climbing up the wall, banging a ladder against it.
29:15No one hears it.
29:16They also saw him with a rangefinder 30 minutes early.
29:18It's wild.
29:20It makes no sense.
29:20The thing that I'm most...
29:23The silver lining I'm taking from this thing is people like you guys,
29:26who used to sit there and call people like me wackos and conspiracy theorists.
29:31Now you guys are awake, and now you're starting to ask questions.
29:34I've been asking.
29:35I've been asking for years.
29:36Before we wrap it up, how do you feel about the power grid?
29:38We're losing that.
29:39About the what?
29:40Power grid.
29:41Oh, dude, you're in New York.
29:44It's always on a flimsy thread going out.
29:47Do you think China's going to hack it?
29:50Oh, no.
29:52I do.
29:53No, I don't think China's going to hack it.
29:54I think that in October, if Trump's still leading massively in the polls,
29:58we might have a little power grid incident.
30:00I see that.
30:01Where is your go-bag right now?
30:04Is it in New York, or is it...
30:06I have one in my trunk of my car, one in my apartment.
30:10Good to know.
30:11And I used to have a house, and I used to have a really nice setup there, but...
30:15How many guns do you...
30:16You don't have one in New York right now?
30:18I'm not...
30:18There's not guns.
30:19I don't have guns in my go-bag.
30:22You're not allowed to have any in Manhattan.
30:24Oh, I have lots of guns.
30:25No, you're not.
30:26You're not allowed to have any in Manhattan.
30:27All right.
30:27No, not here.
30:28That's the rundown.
30:29Thanks for joining us.
30:30That's flats to go burst or something.
30:31Follow John Rich at JohnRichTV.