Lovejoy. S06 E10. Last Tango in Lavenham.
First broadcast 4th December 1994.
Tink's decision to leave antiques and open a pub causes Lovejoy to pop the question to Charlotte, but things become complicated with Jane's return from America.
Ian McShane ... Lovejoy
Dudley Sutton ... Tinker Dill
Caroline Langrishe ... Charlotte Cavendish
Diane Parish ... Beth Taylor
Phyllis Logan ... Lady Jane Felsham
Chris Jury ... Eric Catchpole
David Ryall ... Sam Cavendish
Shelagh McLeod ... Professor Lowry
Brian Croucher ... Addey
Maggie Ollerenshaw ... Kate Henshaw
Amelia Curtis ... Viki
Ashley Barker ... Jeff Brolly
Mark Straker ... Estate Agent
Phil Cornwell ... Syd Bishop
Mike Tezcan ... Driver
Tony Gardner ... Jonathan
Elizabeth Banks ... Shelagh
Amy Brooke ... Local Barmaid
Gary Dunnington ... Landlord
David Shindler ... Waiter
Paul T.T. Easter ... Wedding guest
Guy Normas ... Kidnapper
Tink's decision to leave antiques and open a pub causes Lovejoy to pop the question to Charlotte, but things become complicated with Jane's return from America.
Ian McShane ... Lovejoy
Dudley Sutton ... Tinker Dill
Caroline Langrishe ... Charlotte Cavendish
Diane Parish ... Beth Taylor
Phyllis Logan ... Lady Jane Felsham
Chris Jury ... Eric Catchpole
David Ryall ... Sam Cavendish
Shelagh McLeod ... Professor Lowry
Brian Croucher ... Addey
Maggie Ollerenshaw ... Kate Henshaw
Amelia Curtis ... Viki
Ashley Barker ... Jeff Brolly
Mark Straker ... Estate Agent
Phil Cornwell ... Syd Bishop
Mike Tezcan ... Driver
Tony Gardner ... Jonathan
Elizabeth Banks ... Shelagh
Amy Brooke ... Local Barmaid
Gary Dunnington ... Landlord
David Shindler ... Waiter
Paul T.T. Easter ... Wedding guest
Guy Normas ... Kidnapper
Transcript
00:00♪
00:30♪
00:50The Romans built houses with stone and tiled roofs.
01:01Now what we're excavating here is a large house or villa.
01:07And if you look down there, you can see that we've uncovered a section of mosaic floor.
01:12What's that?
01:20The Inland Revenue SWAT team.
01:23Burn the books, Beth.
01:31Buyers.
01:32They've been coming in droves since the bank dropped the asking price.
01:36First ones in the helicopter, mind.
01:38That can't be good for the Copper Beach, can it?
01:41Hello!
01:47Are you the gardener?
01:48Excuse me?
01:49Or are you just stealing apples?
01:51I live in the barn.
01:53What?
01:54I run my business from there, antiques.
01:56Really?
01:58Well, if I buy this place, I might need a few of those.
02:02Sort of house that needs a few antiques, isn't it?
02:05Needs a bit more than that.
02:07I suppose the agents told you about the rising damp, asbestos, ghosts?
02:12I am the agent, and that's absolute nonsense.
02:14I'll show you around, Mr. Addy.
02:17Watch out for the killer bees.
02:23Definitely not squire material.
02:25Come back, Charlie Gimbert, all is forgiven.
02:30Truth is, I don't want to see Felsham Hall sold at all.
02:35I remember all the times I spent here with Tinker and Janie and Eric.
02:40Sometimes the past is a safer place to be.
03:06I still think my pub needs a new sign.
03:10Have you thought of anything, Beth?
03:12Well, it's a bit hard to come up with something inspiring with a pilchard in it.
03:18It was a smuggler's inn. What about a pilchard with an eyepatch?
03:21Pay no attention to him. He's not going anywhere.
03:23I'm seriously considering it, Lovejoy.
03:25I've come to the end of the road in this game.
03:27Tired feet, tired liver.
03:29You're a barker, Barney.
03:31You're a barker. Barkers don't retire.
03:33Ronnie Barker did.
03:34And what did he do? He opened an antique shop.
03:37It is nature's law to change. Constancy alone is strange.
03:41Did you go to a Chinese restaurant last night?
03:44It's the Earl of Rochester, Lovejoy. You should know that.
03:47Sounds like an excuse for cheating on his wife.
03:51I know we've been together for many years,
03:54but if I leave, you're going to need a new partner.
03:57But if I leave, you're going to need a new partner.
04:00And I don't just mean somebody who can help you in this nefarious business.
04:04I mean someone who can give you something that I never could, like sex.
04:10What?
04:13It means Charlotte.
04:17Coffee in the lounge, I think.
04:19Darling, would you like to see about drinks?
04:22Shall I open some more vino, or would anyone like a brandy?
04:25No, I'll stick with the pork, thanks very much.
04:27I'll stick with Sam.
04:29Charlotte?
04:31No, no, thank you.
04:33It appears that I'm the designated driver.
04:39So, what's happening, Lovejoy?
04:42Oh, you know, Sam.
04:44Another day too late, dollar short.
04:47I hear Tinker's leaving. You'll miss him.
04:52Charlotte's been offered this job in New York.
04:55Didn't she tell you?
05:02Must have flipped her mind.
05:04That's surprising, isn't it?
05:06Considering your, er... your situation.
05:10Drop me off here, Charlotte. I need a breath of fresh air.
05:13You can take Lovejoy back.
05:16Come on.
05:20See you in the morning.
05:22Good night, Sam. Good night.
05:29Were you ever going to mention it,
05:31or was I simply going to get a postcard marked Manhattan one day?
05:35Did my father mention this?
05:38Sick and tired of him poking his nose into my affairs.
05:41If you're thinking about a job 3,000 miles away,
05:44it says something about us, doesn't it?
05:47I'm ambitious, Lovejoy.
05:49You've always known that.
05:51I wasn't looking for a heavy, emotional relationship.
05:59Anyone there?
06:04Hello?
06:06We're great together.
06:09We were mutually attracted.
06:12We're like the same people, like the same things.
06:15We had sex.
06:17Yes, we had sex.
06:21We've tap-danced around each other long enough, Charlotte.
06:24Maybe we should just get married.
06:34Hello there.
06:39Anyone about?
06:43What's going on?
06:48I think I need to sleep on this.
06:55I think you need to, too, don't you?
07:09WHISTLE BLOWS
07:11Oh, what?
07:13Oh, Charlotte, I thought we were going to sleep on this.
07:17Huh?
07:19Well, I'm away.
07:22BEEPING
07:36Is he all right? They don't know yet.
07:38So what happened?
07:40When I got back home, he wasn't there.
07:42Well, obviously I was worried, so I went back to the place where we dropped him off.
07:46The gate to the dig was open. I heard this terrible moaning in the dark.
07:50What's that party for?
07:52He didn't fall. He was attacked.
07:54Who would do a thing like that?
07:57Nighthawks.
07:59Of course it's a fake.
08:01It's by Giovanni Bastianini, the greatest terracotta faker in the world.
08:07No, you can't have your money back.
08:09This stuff's worth more than the originals.
08:13Not only do people not appreciate a genuine antique when they see one,
08:16they don't appreciate a genuine fake.
08:18Your cousin's on the phone, do you?
08:20I had a good teacher, didn't I?
08:22Tell Tiggy he's going to have to do this sale on his own.
08:24I've got to go and see Sam in hospital.
08:26How is he? He's conscious.
08:28Don't forget you've got to go to the bank.
08:30Bank?
08:32You have an appointment there at 12 with Mr Brolley.
08:35Oh, oh, oh. Or have you forgotten?
08:37And have you also forgotten that I have the afternoon off?
08:40Nope.
08:42You didn't tell me where you were going, did you?
08:44No, I didn't.
08:46I'll tell you one thing. There weren't kids.
08:48There were big fellas.
08:50And they were in a car.
08:52Did you get a good look at it?
08:54No, not really.
08:57All I remember is it had a towing hook on the back.
09:00I remember that because I banged my knee on it.
09:03You know?
09:05One of those hooks that you pull horseboxes and bones.
09:13We'll get him, Sam.
09:15Well, you can see the problem.
09:17We can't afford full-time security.
09:19But we're getting some light put in.
09:21I've had problems with Nighthawks before.
09:23They vandalised the last dig I was doing near Bedford.
09:26So these people find out where the legitimate digs are
09:29and then they move in at night and plunder them?
09:31Yeah. And they do such damage.
09:33And when we find tooth comb everything
09:35and they move in with pickaxes and metal detectors.
09:38Well, at least your father made them leave in a hurry.
09:40They left these behind.
09:42Something to show the police, I suppose.
09:44Police aren't much help, I'm afraid.
09:46Anything happening?
09:48They left these behind.
09:50Stick them in the back. I'll check them out.
09:52Oh, Lovejoy, this is Professor Lowry.
09:54Professor.
09:56Um, why so smart?
09:58Oh, er, bank appointment.
10:00Is this connected with a proposal?
10:02Money for the engagement ring? A honeymoon in the Azores?
10:05I'm late, Charlotte. Can we talk about it some other time?
10:07Professor, nice meeting you. Excuse me, Charlotte.
10:10Broly, eh?
10:12That's a fortunate name for a bank manager.
10:15It suggests the shelter of your financial protection
10:17from the problems that rain down on us.
10:19You seem to have had a fair measure of protection from my predecessor.
10:22Oh, yes, Mr Oxdale.
10:24I've been with him for years. Where is he?
10:26Barry had a bit of a drinking problem between ourselves.
10:29Got a bit sloppy.
10:31Allowed a few things to slide that he shouldn't have.
10:34Oh, it's about my overdraft.
10:36Oh, never mind that for the moment.
10:38What was the name of your previous landlord at Felsham Hall?
10:41Charlie Gimbert.
10:43Gimbert, right.
10:45And since Mr Gimbert has disappeared into the great blue yonder,
10:48the bank has owned the house,
10:50and I understand the agreement allows you to stay on as tenant at the same rent.
10:54In the barn.
10:56What?
10:58I don't live in Felsham Hall. I live in the barn.
11:00I don't care whether you live in the barn or in the toolshed.
11:03You haven't paid any rent for seven months.
11:11You all right?
11:13This damn knee keeps stiffening up.
11:17A gardening accident?
11:19Rugby.
11:20Oh, it's not my game. I'm shape-balled.
11:22The bank want to see the back rent.
11:25And they want you out of there by the end of the month.
11:28If I was to stay in the hall until it was sold, that's always been the deal.
11:31There's been a firm offer.
11:34I hope it's not from that bloke who landed yesterday in the helicopter
11:37and nearly turned the copper beech into a bonsai tree.
11:39What have you got against Mr Addy?
11:41He's just not the type.
11:43Felsham Hall is a grade-two star Queen Anne home listed in Pevsner's,
11:47and it deserves better.
11:49The bank is not emotionally attached to the house.
11:52And by the end of the month, nor will you be.
12:09Here you go, Tinker.
12:11Thanks, Polly.
12:12Hello, Lovejoy.
12:13Same again.
12:14You got your tickets for the dance yet?
12:16Unfortunately, yes.
12:19I went to the sale at that house outside of Tudnham.
12:22Tell me you've got something we can sell.
12:24I put a deposit on a tripod table with beautiful pie-crust edging.
12:28Oh, and I bought these.
12:29They're from a young man named John to Lady Claire
12:32when she lived there in the 1840s.
12:34They're from a young man named John to Lady Claire
12:36when she lived there in the 1840s.
12:38He appears smitten but evasive,
12:40but they're very charming and we can afford them.
12:47What's the matter, Admiral?
12:49I'm tired.
12:50Look down the mouth.
12:52Do you remember Herman Kahn?
12:54The French polisher outside of Dunmo.
12:56No, it's another Herman Kahn.
12:58This fellow was an enormous bloke
13:00who wrote a book about the nuclear holocaust
13:03called Thinking About the Unthinkable.
13:06That's what I've been doing lately, Tink,
13:08thinking about the unthinkable.
13:10You're not going to settle with the income tax?
13:15Oh, I don't know.
13:16You've been thinking about going off and running a pub.
13:19Beth wants to better herself.
13:22I might lose the business.
13:25So last night I proposed to Charlotte.
13:27I'm sorry?
13:30I said I proposed to Charlotte last night.
13:32Proposed what?
13:33What do you think, you pillock?
13:35My God.
13:38You could honeymoon at the Pilchard Inn.
13:40I'd give you a really good rate.
13:42Tink!
13:46She hasn't even given me an answer yet.
13:48If you frighten, she'll say no.
13:52If you're worried, she'll say yes.
13:59I wish you well, House.
14:02I wish you a tenant
14:04who never installs a workout room,
14:07a recording studio or a jacuzzi.
14:11I wish you a family with children
14:14and golden Labradors
14:16who like log fires
14:19and lovely antiques.
14:23Maybe it's just as well I'm moving, aren't I?
14:26I've got too many memories invested in this place.
14:29Too many ghosts.
14:30Lovejoy!
14:32Lovejoy, what are you doing here?
14:34I'm talking to myself. What does it look like?
14:36Anyway, listen, I've got some news for you,
14:39if you're interested.
14:41Go on.
14:42I've got it.
14:43You've got what?
14:45I didn't think I stood the remotest chance,
14:47but I've got it.
14:48You've got what?
14:49The Fitzwilliam Museum in Cambridge.
14:52They're going to take me on
14:54in their book and manuscript department.
14:56You've got another job?
14:57Well, you knew I was looking.
14:59You trained me.
15:00I owe it all to you.
15:03What's wrong?
15:05Oh, nothing, kid.
15:08I'm very happy for you.
15:10Fitzwilliam Museum, eh?
15:12I'm very, very proud of you.
15:14Probably another would-be buyer.
15:16I guess I'm just allergic to change.
15:19Lovejoy?
15:25Hello.
15:29Hello.
15:35This is just like the old barn you used to have
15:37when we first met. Do you remember?
15:41I can't get over you driving up just like that.
15:44I must confess, I got a bit of a shock
15:46when I saw you two embracing on the lawn.
15:49Oh, no, not in that way.
15:51I'm just a general dog's body, dishwasher,
15:53an unpaid slave.
15:55Oh, not for me, thanks, Beth.
15:57I'm on my way to lunch with my sister,
15:59and I'm late already.
16:00She told me the house was for sale.
16:02I just couldn't resist taking a look.
16:04You really thinking of buying it?
16:05Well, the asking price is quite tempting.
16:07It's in much better shape than when you left, you know.
16:09Before Charlie went belly-up, he did quite a few things,
16:11including state-of-the-art central heating.
16:13Well, it's a big decision.
16:15It's the right one, though, Janie, I think.
16:17I think it's karma.
16:18Your new birthday?
16:19If you don't buy it, some bank robber will
16:21or some Hong Kong heroin dealer.
16:23Look, I really must go.
16:25No, you can't.
16:26What have you been up to?
16:27I'm here for a while.
16:29Let's have lunch and a really good natter, OK?
16:31Bye, Beth. Nice to meet you.
16:33Nice to meet you, too, Lady Felcher.
16:37You've changed your hair.
16:38Have I?
16:39Oh, it's a little longer, possibly.
16:41Don't you like it?
16:42Oh, yeah, but I liked it the way it was before.
16:45I'll give you a call.
16:50Do you like everything the way it was before?
16:53You got Barbra Streisand and a hundred-piece orchestra
16:55in your head singing the way we were.
16:58Haven't you got something to do before you leave me?
17:08Sid!
17:11Sid!
17:14Sid!
17:16Lovejoy! Blow me!
17:18Your wife said I'd find you out here.
17:20Yeah, she should have given you some decent gear, mate.
17:22No, thanks.
17:23In the fashion states, you're on a par with train spotters.
17:26Train spotters are nerds.
17:28We're explorers, silent scholars of the past.
17:31So, did you find anything today?
17:32Belt buckle. It's not very old, though.
17:34Yeah, this clay pipe's nice.
17:36It's been in the ground a bit, mind.
17:38Now, you see how small that bowl is, Lovejoy?
17:41Now, that goes back to the days when tobacco was scarce.
17:44You ever come across any night lords?
17:47They're rather specialised, Tink.
17:49I'm sure you'd get a better price if you hung on for a private buyer.
17:52We can't afford the luxury at the moment.
17:54We really need them in Tuesday's auction.
17:56Take care.
17:59Jane!
18:02You warm the cockles of this cold old heart.
18:05How are you?
18:06Oh, I'm terribly well. So good to see you.
18:10I don't believe you've met.
18:12Lady Jane Felsham, this is Charlotte Cavendish.
18:15Hello. Hello.
18:17Charlotte runs the business now.
18:19Oh, really?
18:20I must say, I do miss this place and all my old chums.
18:24You must know Lovejoy.
18:26Yes.
18:27If we were to go over to the White Swan, we might surprise him.
18:30He's just popped in there for a drink.
18:32Oh, I saw him yesterday.
18:34Really?
18:35I'm surprised he didn't mention it.
18:37I'm going to browse.
18:39Come on, Tink, find me a bargain.
18:43Is that her?
18:44Yes.
18:45Not what I expected.
18:47I thought she'd be one of those countrified Sloanes
18:50who yonk around Suffolk in a pair of green wellies with a bad haircut.
18:54That's a designer suit.
18:55She didn't get those shoes in St Edmund's either.
18:58She's already seen Lovejoy?
19:00Oh, they're very old friends.
19:02You mustn't think her return affects your situation.
19:05What situation is that?
19:08No idea at all.
19:10Now, when I find something,
19:13I like to think of the last person who ever laid hands on it.
19:16It connects me to them, you know.
19:18If it's a few hundred years ago, well, it really gets me here.
19:21Night Orcs don't think like that, do they?
19:23Nope.
19:24They did that site over at Wenham the other night.
19:26I know, there's a few teams about.
19:28Some of them are local, some from London.
19:30It's like a network, isn't it?
19:31I mean, from what I hear, there's one guy who fences everything overseas.
19:34Yeah, anyway, they left this behind them, Sid,
19:36and I want you to show it around, yeah?
19:38Yeah.
19:39See if you can find out who sold it, who bought it, whatever.
19:42It's a bit of a long shot, isn't it?
19:44Yeah, but it's not an everyday item, is it, Sid?
19:46No, it's not my line.
19:48My dearest Claire,
19:50I was much troubled during the journey to Venice,
19:53not by the vicissitudes of foreign travel,
19:56but by the manner of our parting.
19:58I fear that in my regard for you,
20:00I raised false expectations,
20:02which I know by my nature I am incapable of gratifying.
20:05Cold fig dinner, Rona.
20:08I know no man, sweet Claire,
20:10who would not covet the warmth of your affection.
20:12If blame is to be attached,
20:14it lies in my own intolerable vacillation and uncertainty.
20:18This sounds like someone who proposed,
20:20got cold feet and piddled off to Italy.
20:23Is it giving you ideas?
20:25Why would you say that?
20:27I met your friend, Jane Felsham, today.
20:32She's rather nice.
20:34She's rather nice.
20:36Yeah, she's an old and valued friend.
20:39Really?
20:41I always had the feeling she was the love of your life.
20:48So, her being here does make a difference.
20:52A difference to what you asked me the other night.
20:55You never gave me an answer.
20:57I'm terribly sorry, Charlotte, but we're running late.
21:00Organising committee for the dance.
21:02I'll see you outside?
21:07I'll give you an answer when I'm sure you mean the question.
21:13My dearest Claire, I fear that in my regard for you,
21:17I raised false expectations,
21:20which I know by my nature I am incapable of gratifying.
21:28I know no man, sweet Claire,
21:31sweet Charlotte, sweet Jane...
21:33Lovejoy, I think I've noticed something.
21:36Yeah?
21:37This handwriting is different from the letters.
21:40I think it's Claire's.
21:42A poem she copied out.
21:44Trust thou thy love if she be proud...
21:47If she not sweet. That's Ruskin, I think.
21:50What?
21:51John Ruskin, 19th century English poet. Keep on reading.
21:54Erm...
21:55Isn't deep among the loitering banks
21:57as if enamoured of the scene
21:59for a live long summer day
22:01should he relax her angry frown
22:03and soothe to slumber lay her down amid the vine-clad banks.
22:07Yeah, that's definitely Ruskin. What year is it?
22:10Erm... 1845.
22:12Yeah, that's about right. Now, where's it from?
22:15Pensionis Agusso Venezia.
22:17Here it is. Venice.
22:19Part of his momentous tour to Italy.
22:22And then... when was it?
22:24Six years later he got married, but not to our Claire.
22:28So what are you saying?
22:30I'm saying that the John in these letters could be John Ruskin.
22:35Get these over to your friends at Fitzwilliam.
22:38Get a sample of Ruskin's handwriting.
22:40If they match, we're in clover, kid.
22:42So, you're feeling better, are you?
22:45Oh, yeah.
22:51Would you like to order now, sir, or would you rather wait for the lady?
22:55I'm sure she won't be long. Certainly, sir.
23:01Oh, Lovejoy, I'm terribly sorry, but I've broken down.
23:04I could always...
23:05No, you can't come to get me. I've got to wait for the AA.
23:08It's my sister's car. I can't just leave it.
23:10Oh, Jenny, I was really looking forward to seeing you and having a chat.
23:14I know. Me too. But I'll see you at the dance tonight, won't I?
23:18Mm.
23:25America's the biggest market, but the problem is getting the stuff over there.
23:29I'm still down. It's less, but it's much safer.
23:32Lovejoy.
23:34Things looking up?
23:36Wouldn't have thought Le Manoir would have been your customary watering hole.
23:39No, yours, bro. I thought you bank types usually went to the pizzeria in Market Street.
23:43Mm.
23:44We've met, have we?
23:46Yeah, at Felsham Hall. You thought I was nicking apples.
23:49I don't think our friend over there wants me to buy that house.
23:53You will leave him without a roof over his head.
23:56Maybe I could offer him something.
23:58He could accompany my wife around the countryside, picking out arches.
24:02You haven't closed the sale yet, have you, Brawley?
24:05I may have another customer for you. Lady Felsham.
24:08Lady Felsham? Who's this?
24:10She was married to the original owner.
24:12The Felshams have owned the place for over 300 years.
24:15I don't much care if they've been there since Bodecia.
24:18If I want that place, I'll buy it.
24:23How's the Montrachet?
24:25The Montrachet is weighty but crisp.
24:28Well, maybe we'll try one.
24:30Tell you what.
24:33Try this one.
24:54Get it, Anstey?
24:56I thought you'd never ask.
25:04Who did Janey come with?
25:06I think it's her solicitor and his wife.
25:09Looks good, though, doesn't she?
25:11So does Charlotte.
25:14Try some grapes, will you?
25:19Can I see a real grape?
25:28I'm glad to be out of there for five minutes.
25:30This is my most unfavourite night of the year.
25:32Every dealer, divvy, faker.
25:34I don't know what to do with myself.
25:36I don't know what to do with myself.
25:38I don't know what to do with myself.
25:40This is my most unfavourite night of the year.
25:42Every dealer, divvy, faker, forger, barker,
25:44doorknocker and cloth jobber we've ever known
25:46all in one room at the same time wearing bow ties.
25:50Well, it may be my last.
25:53The pub needn't answer by tomorrow.
25:56Oh, it's about time, lovejoy.
25:59Before I become an antique myself.
26:01You could always join the band, then.
26:05I had the weirdest dream last night.
26:08Oh, really? I...
26:10I dreamt I was lot 52 at an auction
26:13and couldn't even make my own reserves.
26:16Oh, tick!
26:22Do you really see yourself dealing with rowdies
26:24in your braids like that every night, eh?
26:28Um, that scarf those guys are wearing, what is it?
26:31Local rugby club. Old Trin pins.
26:35Does lovejoy know about this?
26:37Nobody does. Well, except my sister and now you.
26:41From what I hear, you're sort of involved with lovejoy.
26:44Yes.
26:45Well, I don't know what you've heard, but we never were.
26:48Oh, involved? Really?
26:50Not in the way that people thought we were.
26:52As everyone assumed we were lovers,
26:54I suppose we might as well have been,
26:56but I was married at the time
26:58and rather old-fashioned about those sort of things.
27:00The couple with women like us.
27:02If we think we can change people like lovejoy.
27:04I used to find ignoring him was the easiest way to upset him.
27:07Oh, yes. Drives him crazy.
27:09But he's so self-centred. Oh, he's quite vain.
27:11Oh! God, yes.
27:13Can't pass a mirror.
27:16I think it's time I broke you two up.
27:19Would one of you carry down?
27:21You can't tango, lovejoy.
27:23He can, actually.
27:32MUSIC CONTINUES
28:02MUSIC CONTINUES
28:32MUSIC CONTINUES
28:40Is that steam coming out of their noses?
28:42Tango was outlawed in Argentina for years
28:45for its sexually explicit nature.
28:48I would think after tonight it'll be outlawed in East Anglia.
28:59Sid!
29:02Sid!
29:08Ah, hello, me old mate.
29:10Heard there's a nice bit of copper on the roof up there.
29:13Oh, thanks very much, Sid, but I'm not that desperate.
29:16Or not yet, anyway.
29:18So, what's up? I got the message.
29:20Oh, yeah, I had a bit of luck.
29:22I showed your metal detector to a guy in Cambridge.
29:24He rang a dealer in Norwich, gave him the serial number.
29:27Turns out he remembers selling it to a bloke called Broly.
29:31Back in hold. Hit them low.
29:34Up!
29:37Back in hold.
29:40Up!
29:44Back in hold.
29:47Up!
29:51Last couple.
29:54Up!
30:00Up!
30:03OK, boys, in you go.
30:06Toby, concession.
30:16Morning.
30:22Oh, by the way, there's a bloke over there looking for you.
30:27OK.
30:31All right. What's all this about?
30:33Very impressive.
30:34Thank you.
30:35Take a look at this.
30:37I bought it off a kid who found it with one of those metal detector things.
30:41Is it valuable?
30:42It's worth about 80 quid.
30:44That's not going to help your overdraft?
30:46No, Geoffrey, this is a proposition,
30:48but I know I can find a lot more of them, OK?
30:53You got those bears in yet?
30:55Listen, I've got five minutes of your time, OK?
30:57This is gold, right?
30:58It's Henry II.
30:59Now, this is worth a fortune in those days.
31:02Enough to feed a family for six months.
31:04So?
31:05So, you didn't lose something like this, right?
31:08If you did, the whole parish went out looking for it.
31:12Where's this leading?
31:14Well, there's got to be a hoard of them, you see.
31:17And it could be a find like that Roman one a couple of years ago.
31:20Remember what it had come to? 1.75 million or something?
31:23You know where the kid found them?
31:25Yeah, exactly.
31:26You know that dig near Wenham?
31:28You've driven past it?
31:29Yeah, well, it's in that same field.
31:32It's in the north-east corner where the wall meets the road right now.
31:36I was thinking if the bank could stake me to some proper equipment...
31:40Tell you what.
31:41Why don't you come and see me in the bank on Monday morning?
31:44I'll see what I can do.
31:52If you know who owned the metal detector,
31:54why don't you give his name to the police?
31:56You might wriggle out of it.
31:58He could say that it had been stolen from his garage or his car.
32:04Well, we've got our lights in now, so it's not likely to happen again.
32:25There!
32:26What's that?
32:27What is it?
32:28I'll take this shot.
32:29Come here.
32:30Come on, mate.
32:46What's that?
32:47Yes, it's Jeff.
32:48Come on, give us a hint.
32:55There it is.
32:59Here it is!
33:05Watch out! Watch out!
33:06Jeff!
33:09This way!
33:17Don't even think about it.
33:19Evening, Mr Brolly.
33:24Tea and biscuits?
33:25No.
33:35You've found your own bias, have you?
33:37Don't be cynical.
33:39Some people won't be very happy about this.
33:42I mean, I'm just a small cog in a very big wheel.
33:45That's not my problem, Jeffrey.
33:47Mine is the background.
33:50It's forgotten.
33:52And I don't want Andy buying the house.
33:54That's out of my hands.
33:56There's been a better offer?
33:59Is there anything else?
34:01My overdraft.
34:06Your scarf.
34:10I always thought these Nighthawks were tearaways or kids on the dole.
34:14And all the time it's the bank manager and his mates from the rugby club.
34:17I told him you wouldn't prosecute, Sam.
34:19Provided they gave us all the stuff they'd nicked recently.
34:22Where do they keep it?
34:23In his bank.
34:26How beautiful upon the mountain are the feet of she that bringeth good news.
34:32Ruskin?
34:33Ruskin.
34:34Confirmed.
34:35Yes!
34:36Yes.
34:37I've got a signed authentication from the curator of the Fitzwilliam.
34:40Oh, that's great, Beth.
34:42Here you go, Sam. Give that to Charlotte.
34:44Tell her we'll stick the letters in tomorrow's auction.
34:46Right.
34:47So, you nailed the Shitehawks, then?
34:49Actually, it's Nighthawks, Beth.
34:51But, um, on the other hand...
35:00I'm sorry about lunch yesterday.
35:02It's really...
35:04Go on.
35:06No.
35:08I was just going to say how wonderful it is to see you.
35:12Funny, I was going to say exactly the same thing.
35:15I was going to say exactly the same thing.
35:17And I wanted to tell you that I'm not going to buy the house.
35:22Oh?
35:24I know how much you want me to, Lovejoy.
35:27You want me back there as Lady Felsham.
35:30And we'd be up to our old games again,
35:32finding antiques in out-of-the-way places.
35:34What's wrong with that?
35:36It's the past.
35:37So, what's wrong with the past?
35:39Nice place to be.
35:41Included Tinker and Eric.
35:43You and me?
35:45All those memories.
35:47Wouldn't be fair to Robert.
35:50Robert?
35:52We met in America.
35:55But he wants to come back to England, and so do I.
35:59He produces plays.
36:01Totally different world, really.
36:08Anyway, we're getting married.
36:11Quite soon, actually, and so I suppose
36:14it makes more sense to live in London.
36:20Wow.
36:29I've thought about you so much since you left.
36:34And most of what I've thought about
36:37is...
36:39is wasted opportunities.
36:41The chances that don't come round again.
36:46After all, you and I were almost...
36:48We were always almost, Lovejoy.
36:51There must be a reason for that.
36:57You'd make a good team, you and Charlotte.
37:01She told me last night, and I told her about Robert.
37:08It's true.
37:13Threw me a real curve, coming back.
37:17I know.
37:31Be happy, James.
37:34You too.
37:36This is lot number 43, ladies and gentlemen.
37:39A series of love letters written to Lady Clare Hemble
37:42between 1845 and 1847.
37:45It's established that the author is John Ruskin,
37:48Victorian art dealer and social theorist.
37:51Now, this is an extremely exciting discovery,
37:54so he'll start the bidding at £6,000.
37:58Do I have £6,000 anywhere?
38:00£5,000, then.
38:02£5,000. Thank you, sir.
38:04£5,500.
38:06£5,500. And £6,000.
38:08£6,000. £6,500.
38:11Do I have £6,500 anywhere?
38:14All right, then. £250.
38:17£6,250. And £5,000.
38:20And £7,500. And £7,000?
38:22£7,000. Thank you.
38:24And £250.
38:26And £500.
38:28And £750.
38:30Do I have £7,750?
38:34Thank you. And £8,000.
38:37It says Cavendish and son. Where's the son?
38:41I'm the daughter.
38:43Boy, oh, boy, that must have taken some doing.
38:47Was your tail rattling as you slid across the floor?
38:53That's all I am to you, isn't it? Another punter!
38:56Well, if that's what you want out of this relationship, fine!
38:59What you did for Tink,
39:01I think it was wonderful.
39:04I don't think nothing of it.
39:08Selling these Victorian letters, then, for £8,000.
39:12Going once. Going twice.
39:15Marry me!
39:21Yes.
39:34APPLAUSE
39:43Shut up.
39:48Oof.
39:50I can't find the roof of my mouth, Tink.
39:53Stag parties at our age are ridiculous.
39:58When I run that pub, lovejoy, I'm coming off the sauce.
40:01I encourage you to drink the first year's profit.
40:07Nelson Mandela's president of South Africa.
40:10You're going on the wagon.
40:13I'm getting married.
40:15Here's to the three of us.
40:19Yeah.
40:25I've got your best man's present here, Tink.
40:28Would you close your eyes, please?
40:30Thank you.
40:34This is to say,
40:36thanks for all the years.
40:38Thanks for being there.
40:41And thanks for being my best friend.
40:43You can open them now.
40:46Oh!
40:48Do you like it?
40:50Yeah, well, you can thank Beth for the artwork
40:52and we thought that the rank was appropriate.
40:55Oh, dear. What?
40:57Well, you know I've always told you
40:59I was a major in the Royal Air Force.
41:01Mm-hm.
41:02Actually, I was a corporal in the Catering Corps.
41:04Well, I've always known that, Tink. Have you?
41:06Yeah, you've told me a thousand times. Have I?
41:08Well, yeah, but we thought that, you know,
41:10Corporal Dill wouldn't cut the mustard at the Pilchard Inn.
41:12And what does he always say about, you know,
41:14walk in any pub in England and ask for the major?
41:16No, you'll get one of two replies.
41:19He's in the other bar, sir.
41:21Or you've just missed him, but he'll be back this evening.
41:28Oh, Jeanie!
41:30Eric!
41:32Oh!
41:34Lovely.
41:36Oh, where's the motorbike?
41:38Oh, well, I've sold that cos I'm not the wild one no more.
41:40You know, I've got to look to the future, plan ahead.
41:43Well, like Lovejoy, really.
41:45I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
41:47I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
41:49I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
41:51I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
41:53I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
41:55Well, like Lovejoy, really.
41:58Pretty wife, Eric.
42:00Oh, well, we're not actually clergyfied, you know, yet.
42:04Still.
42:06How old's the baby?
42:08Well, I'm not really sure.
42:10No, no, no, it's not mine, you see.
42:12Oh.
42:13Fiesta's mine, though.
42:16HORN HONKS
42:24You got the, er...
42:26Of course I have.
42:28Are you getting cold feet?
42:30Can't tell, Tink.
42:32I don't have any feeling below my knees.
42:34As long as you have feelings above them, you'll be all right.
42:46Are you absolutely sure you want to go through with this?
42:49Absolutely, 100%.
42:51I think.
42:53If there is doubt, where is truth?
42:56Oh, the Rochester?
42:58Chinese restaurant.
43:09Excuse me, I think you should have turned left for Fultram Hall.
43:12I know.
43:15MUSIC FADES
43:39I spoke to Dad this morning. He sounded fine.
43:46HE PANTS
43:49It's Lovejoy!
43:51Yes?
43:52He's been abducted!
43:54What?!
43:56Oh, please.
44:00Oh, you can't still be upset about Fultram Hall.
44:03What I'm upset about is you took money out of my pocket.
44:06I did?
44:07What you took from Broly should have come to me.
44:10Oh, you're the one that fences the stuff overseas.
44:13It's not my principal occupation,
44:15but it's important enough for me to get the dead needle
44:18when Boy Scouts like you can't mind their own business in.
44:40We all know what's happened.
44:43Let's be grateful it was sooner rather than later.
44:48Now there's lots of lovely food and champagne across the road,
44:51so I suggest we all go over there to celebrate the avoidance
44:55of what would obviously have been a disaster.
45:04There, but for the grace of God...
45:07What?
45:09Nothing, darling.
45:13MUSIC PLAYS
45:30Where are we going?
45:32Jersey!
45:43We're supposed to be getting married.
45:47I just wanted to ruin your day, lovejoy!
46:13BIRDS CHIRP
46:19Addie was really choked when he found that all he could get out of him
46:23was a receipt from the British Museum.
46:25Still, bruises don't show.
46:30Charlotte's in New York now.
46:32Beth's in Cambridge, Tink's in Devon,
46:35and Janie, she's in Hampstead with Roger.
46:38Or was it Robert?
46:40Anyway, one thing they all taught me...
46:46..you've got to move on.
46:48The past is a foreign country,
46:51and lovejoy doesn't live there anymore.
47:10MUSIC CONTINUES
47:40MUSIC CONTINUES
48:10MUSIC CONTINUES
48:28Be happy, Jane.
48:31You too.
48:40MUSIC CONCLUDES