In My Mind brings viewers into the headspace of people facing struggles related to their mental health.
In this episode, we look at the story of Vincent Valentine — how he was able to seek help in dealing with his difficult relationship with his family, toxic workplaces and self-doubt.
Circles of Resilience by Resilience Collective is a safe space where peers, or persons with lived experience of mental health conditions, come together to help each other thrive and lead authentic lives.
iWorkHealth, developed by the Ministry of Manpower's WSH Institute with various partners, is an online tool for companies to identify common workplace stressors among employees.
Visit www.wshc.sg/iworkhealth to find out more.
Watch more: https://www.asiaone.com/video
In this episode, we look at the story of Vincent Valentine — how he was able to seek help in dealing with his difficult relationship with his family, toxic workplaces and self-doubt.
Circles of Resilience by Resilience Collective is a safe space where peers, or persons with lived experience of mental health conditions, come together to help each other thrive and lead authentic lives.
iWorkHealth, developed by the Ministry of Manpower's WSH Institute with various partners, is an online tool for companies to identify common workplace stressors among employees.
Visit www.wshc.sg/iworkhealth to find out more.
Watch more: https://www.asiaone.com/video
Category
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LearningTranscript
00:00Bravery is not just about having the tenacity to bounce back from adversities.
00:05After I lost my footing in life and help came along, I learned a new meaning to bravery.
00:10To have the courage to admit when you need support.
00:14Growing up, I've always wished that I was my older brother.
00:18He was the favourite in the family. All eyes and ears would be on my brother.
00:23I felt like I didn't have a voice. I felt invisible.
00:27The only way I would be heard by my parents was when I got good grades.
00:31The only time where they showed concern for me was when they asked about my grades.
00:37My brother had all the attention. It was like I did not exist.
00:41He excelled in math and science, but I wasn't good at those subjects.
00:46I was deemed useless.
00:48One time, I was the top scholar in my level for Chinese,
00:51and the only thing my parents said was,
00:54I felt like nothing I did was good enough for them.
00:57It chipped away at me day by day, and I saw myself as a failure.
01:02I lost confidence and was bullied in school since I looked like an easy target.
01:07I hid my feelings and learned to put up a facade as though I was invincible.
01:12I might look unfazed on the outside, but the truth was, it was eating me up on the inside.
01:18But the truth was, it was eating me up on the inside.
01:23I was hanging by a thread, and I had no support.
01:27Friends were few and far between.
01:31All I had was myself.
01:33I had to become my own support system and safety net.
01:37No one knew my true emotions.
01:41I did not want to be seen as weak or meek, so I dealt with difficulties on my own.
01:46But this safety net broke when I started working.
01:50My boss was a nightmare.
01:52She would always talk down to me, and I could not anticipate when she would blow up.
01:58I would go to work feeling the fear of entering my boss's office.
02:01My heart rate would noticeably increase, and I would stutter whenever I had to talk to her.
02:08I lost whatever little confidence I had.
02:11I was constantly walking around on eggshells.
02:14I thought I could handle every trouble thrown at me, but I broke down.
02:20I knew that I had enough.
02:22I plucked up the courage and left that toxic workplace.
02:27I thought that I could start afresh, but I was wrong.
02:32My partner and my new colleagues noticed that something was wrong with me.
02:36My inner demons were taking over me.
02:39But I believed that I could only rely on myself.
02:43Hence, I could never allow myself to be defeated.
02:47The saving grace happened when my supervisor sat me down and spoke to me about seeking help.
02:53They were there to listen, and perhaps for the first time in my life, I felt heard.
03:01They fixed me up with a therapist.
03:03Funny enough, my old job destroyed me, but my new job was what helped me overcome my difficulties.
03:11Without their intervention, I would have reverted to my old ways of trying to overcome my demons myself.
03:17They sent me encouraging messages that I would save and re-read whenever I felt down,
03:22as a way of reminding myself that I am not alone now.
03:26Looking back, the biggest challenge I faced was asking for and accepting help.
03:32Of course, I am still a work in progress.
03:34I am still healing.
03:35I am now a committee member at Circles of Resilience, and that has been part of my healing journey as well.
03:41As a kid who didn't feel loved, an adult who walked alone,
03:45I always thought being resilient was to handle everything by myself.
03:50But I have learned that the bravest thing anyone can ever do is to ask for help when they need it.