• 5 months ago
Transcript
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00:02:45 I'm better now.
00:02:48 I think it helped.
00:02:50 That's good.
00:02:52 Things been busy?
00:02:56 Things are always busy, James.
00:03:00 [BLANK_AUDIO]
00:03:05 I was thinking I could just rent a U-Haul and
00:03:09 drive myself to Boston, that way you don't have to leave the farm.
00:03:14 [BLANK_AUDIO]
00:03:20 What do you think?
00:03:21 [BLANK_AUDIO]
00:03:25 We need to talk about you going to college.
00:03:27 [BLANK_AUDIO]
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00:03:57 James, that was my money, you had no right to use it.
00:04:14 Sometimes life isn't fair, we both know that.
00:04:17 There were hospital bills and a funeral had to be paid for,
00:04:21 not to mention your treatment.
00:04:23 [BLANK_AUDIO]
00:04:25 Look, I've been putting some money away while you were gone, so
00:04:29 if you can just help me with the harvest next fall,
00:04:32 then maybe you can go to college in a year.
00:04:35 I already deferred my enrollment once to give my spot to somebody else.
00:04:39 [BLANK_AUDIO]
00:04:45 I'm doing my best, James, Jesus.
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00:05:08 [MUSIC]
00:05:11 When was the last time you fantasized sexually about men?
00:05:15 About four months ago, I guess.
00:05:18 Nothing since then?
00:05:20 No dreams?
00:05:22 Daydreams?
00:05:23 No.
00:05:24 [BLANK_AUDIO]
00:05:27 What about women?
00:05:29 I think about women often.
00:05:31 Hm.
00:05:32 And what do you think about when you masturbate?
00:05:35 I don't masturbate.
00:05:37 [BLANK_AUDIO]
00:05:42 You looking forward to going home?
00:05:44 No, I've had a very nice time here.
00:05:47 I'm not trying to trick you.
00:05:49 [BLANK_AUDIO]
00:05:54 I'm sure it'll be very nice.
00:05:56 [BLANK_AUDIO]
00:06:00 Have you spoken to your father lately?
00:06:02 He called on my birthday.
00:06:04 Oh, how's he doing?
00:06:08 Seems fine.
00:06:10 Hm.
00:06:13 James, did your father ever seek counseling after your mother passed away?
00:06:18 He might not have dealt with his grief.
00:06:20 My father's a very strong man.
00:06:22 I don't think he'll need therapy for anything.
00:06:24 Sometimes even strong people need someone to talk to.
00:06:30 I'm sure he'll be glad to have you around.
00:06:33 Before you head off to, um,
00:06:37 Berkeley College of Music.
00:06:39 You must be looking forward to that.
00:06:41 Yeah, yes, very much.
00:06:43 Hm.
00:06:44 When you came here you said your greatest desire is to become a concert pianist.
00:06:48 Is that still the case?
00:06:50 Well, I'd still like to, but, uh, it's not the most important thing in my life anymore.
00:06:55 What is now?
00:06:57 God.
00:07:01 I'd like to settle down, meet a girl, have a family.
00:07:07 Well, I'm sure you can still fit music in there somewhere.
00:07:13 Being away from home, you're going to find yourself in a lot of new situations.
00:07:19 There's gonna be a lot of temptations out there for you.
00:07:23 I know.
00:07:25 I'll be good.
00:07:31 I'm sure you will.
00:07:35 Well, I think that about does it.
00:07:39 Once more for the road then?
00:07:47 Our Father, who art in heaven,
00:07:50 we ask you to bless James as he goes forth from here today.
00:07:54 To watch over him as he walks through temptation.
00:07:59 Guide him, help him, deliver him from evil.
00:08:03 Lead him on your path to salvation.
00:08:07 Help him to avoid the sins of the flesh and to embrace the glory of your light.
00:08:14 We ask these things in your name, oh Lord, and pray.
00:08:18 Amen.
00:08:19 Amen.
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00:12:20 God damn it!
00:12:22 Oh!
00:12:23 You okay?
00:12:24 Yeah, just stupid.
00:12:27 Watch that handle, it's really hot.
00:12:29 Alright.
00:12:30 [sizzling]
00:12:45 You know, I've been thinking.
00:12:48 Maybe taking a course at the community college wouldn't be a bad idea.
00:12:51 Give you a leg up.
00:12:54 I don't know what courses they have.
00:12:56 I don't know if Berkeley will accept them.
00:13:02 But if I were you, I wouldn't go to Boston.
00:13:04 I'd stay closer to home.
00:13:08 Vermont Tech's a good school.
00:13:12 Yeah, Dad, I'm studying music.
00:13:16 What, be a teacher?
00:13:18 Maybe. Or apply.
00:13:22 Okay.
00:13:24 It's what I want to do.
00:13:27 Well, minor in it then.
00:13:32 Look, if I'm paying for this, I want you to major in either agriculture or business or something like that.
00:13:37 Well, then maybe I ought to pay for it.
00:13:39 How you going to do that?
00:13:40 Find a job.
00:13:42 Doing what?
00:13:43 Whatever I have to.
00:13:48 Minimum wage is not going to pay your bills and school both.
00:13:51 Damn it.
00:13:53 I'm going to figure it out.
00:13:56 Why do you have to make things so difficult?
00:13:59 I'm trying to do what's best for you.
00:14:01 You know, one day you're going to inherit this place.
00:14:03 You're going to have this place all to yourself.
00:14:05 Yeah, not any time soon.
00:14:07 Well, we can hope not.
00:14:09 But when you do, I want you to be able to run it.
00:14:15 When it's mine, I intend to sell it.
00:14:20 You will not sell this farm.
00:14:23 This farm was your grandfather's.
00:14:24 This farm was my grandfather's.
00:14:27 This place is home.
00:14:28 This place is a roof over your head.
00:14:30 It's money in the bank when you need it.
00:14:33 You don't understand that now.
00:14:35 You have no idea.
00:14:38 But one day you'll appreciate it.
00:14:44 You see, I'm just trying to do what's best for you.
00:15:12 I'll take a look at those classes at the community college, Dad.
00:15:23 I'd appreciate it.
00:15:24 Yeah.
00:15:26 Okay.
00:15:55 You can just drive around back to the loading dock,
00:15:57 beep the horn, somebody will come give you a hand.
00:16:01 Make sure you get a receipt.
00:16:03 Can you handle that?
00:16:06 Yeah.
00:16:11 Okay.
00:16:35 [Horn honking]
00:16:50 [Horn honking]
00:17:00 James?
00:17:06 When did you get back?
00:17:09 A few days ago.
00:17:13 How are you?
00:17:14 I'm fine.
00:17:24 They got to you, didn't they?
00:17:26 You need to drop these off and get going.
00:17:29 We can't be friends anymore, okay?
00:17:32 Friends?
00:17:35 Dad can't be around you.
00:17:41 I see.
00:17:44 Things are different now.
00:17:47 I'm different.
00:17:53 I'll show you.
00:18:00 Okay, go.
00:18:08 [Tires screeching]
00:18:28 [Door opening]
00:18:54 [♪♪♪]
00:19:04 [♪♪♪]
00:19:24 How are you feeling right now?
00:19:27 Sad.
00:19:30 Can you expand on that?
00:19:32 Sad?
00:19:34 Describe it.
00:19:37 Alone.
00:19:38 I feel alone.
00:19:41 Lonely.
00:19:44 Do you miss your mother?
00:19:51 Yes.
00:19:53 Your father?
00:19:55 What about your friends?
00:19:57 Did you get close to them?
00:20:02 Did you have any special friends?
00:20:12 You mean like best friends?
00:20:15 More special than that.
00:20:17 You have a girlfriend?
00:20:22 No.
00:20:25 What about a boyfriend?
00:20:33 It's okay.
00:20:34 You can tell me.
00:20:37 Yes.
00:20:39 How many?
00:20:43 One.
00:20:46 What was his name?
00:20:50 Charlie.
00:20:56 Were you intimate?
00:21:02 It's okay.
00:21:03 You can tell me.
00:21:06 Sometimes.
00:21:09 How'd that make you feel?
00:21:15 I don't know.
00:21:20 Good, I guess.
00:21:23 Sin makes us feel good while we're committing it, James,
00:21:27 but that doesn't mean it's good for us.
00:21:29 It can really mess us up inside.
00:21:34 And then when we're done, we feel bad about it.
00:21:38 Does that make sense?
00:21:42 Yes.
00:21:44 Charlie is like a drug.
00:21:48 It's hard being away from him right now, I know,
00:21:51 but being with him would be worse.
00:21:57 Once he's out of your system, I promise you,
00:22:00 you're going to feel so much better.
00:22:03 And then you're going to wonder
00:22:05 why you ever had him in your life.
00:22:34 Did you get that receipt?
00:22:40 Well?
00:22:42 Hey, Dad, can you take care of those deliveries from now on?
00:22:45 Why?
00:22:48 I give you one simple job, you can't even do that?
00:22:52 Forget it.
00:22:53 [door opens]
00:23:15 [car horn honks]
00:23:26 I need the receipts.
00:23:29 What?
00:23:30 I need the receipts for the apples.
00:23:42 [door closes]
00:23:51 All right, let's hear it out, please.
00:23:57 What did they do to you?
00:24:00 Don't worry about it.
00:24:06 Are you happier?
00:24:14 Well, you seem happier.
00:24:21 Maybe I should send her for a round.
00:24:22 I don't know if that's what wonders for you.
00:24:47 I want to go to church.
00:24:50 You're going to church tomorrow?
00:24:52 No, Sunday.
00:24:53 All right.
00:24:55 Yeah, I guess.
00:25:01 When you were slaves of sin,
00:25:04 you were free in regard to righteousness.
00:25:06 So what fruit did you then get
00:25:08 from the things of which you are now ashamed?
00:25:11 The end of those things is death.
00:25:14 But now that you have been freed from sin
00:25:17 and enslaved to God,
00:25:19 you are free to live an eternal life.
00:25:23 For the wages of sin is death,
00:25:25 and the gift of God is eternal life
00:25:29 in Jesus Christ, our Lord.
00:25:34 [church bells ring]
00:25:37 Thank you, thank you.
00:25:38 All right, thank you.
00:25:39 Great.
00:25:40 Thank you, Pastor Tom.
00:25:42 Thank you, Lucy.
00:25:44 Richard, James,
00:25:46 so great to have you back with us.
00:25:48 How's the school holding up?
00:25:49 We're doing all right.
00:25:50 Well, that's good to hear.
00:25:52 How old are you now?
00:25:53 19.
00:25:54 19?
00:25:55 Well, my Susie just turned 19.
00:25:56 She's going to UVM in the fall.
00:25:57 That's a good school.
00:25:59 James is thinking about Vermont Tech.
00:26:01 Maybe Susie could give him some advice?
00:26:04 I'm sure she would love that.
00:26:05 Hang on, Susie, could you come here, honey?
00:26:09 Susie, you remember James?
00:26:11 Yeah, not well.
00:26:13 We were a year apart in school.
00:26:14 Well, he's going to college in the fall,
00:26:16 and maybe you can help him with his application.
00:26:18 Yeah, I would love to.
00:26:19 Let me give you my number.
00:26:23 Uh, yeah.
00:26:25 Yeah, sure.
00:26:28 [acoustic guitar plays]
00:26:31 ♪ ♪
00:26:38 ♪ I sent away ♪
00:26:42 ♪ For a treasure ♪
00:26:45 Hey.
00:26:46 ♪ ♪
00:26:49 That looks good.
00:26:52 How many can I take?
00:26:54 One should be enough for now.
00:26:58 Okay.
00:27:00 Did you call Susie yet?
00:27:02 Um, no.
00:27:04 She seems like a nice girl.
00:27:07 She's pretty, too.
00:27:10 Yeah.
00:27:11 ♪ ♪
00:27:14 Yeah.
00:27:16 ♪ ♪
00:27:23 ♪ ♪
00:27:30 ♪ ♪
00:27:35 ♪ You're not here ♪
00:27:38 ♪ ♪
00:27:45 [knocking]
00:27:51 James, come on in.
00:28:00 How are you?
00:28:01 Good.
00:28:02 Great.
00:28:03 Susie?
00:28:05 She'll be right down.
00:28:08 Hi.
00:28:14 Hi.
00:28:16 So, do you want to come to my room?
00:28:20 Uh...
00:28:22 Okay.
00:28:24 ♪ ♪
00:28:31 Here's my application letter
00:28:32 if you want to take a look at it.
00:28:34 Oh, uh...
00:28:36 ♪ ♪
00:28:42 Yeah.
00:28:43 Thank you.
00:28:45 ♪ ♪
00:28:51 I get the feeling you're not really looking
00:28:53 for help with this.
00:28:55 No, no, I'm--I'm sorry.
00:28:57 Don't--don't--don't mean to be rude.
00:29:00 ♪ ♪
00:29:02 Why the lack of interest?
00:29:05 ♪ ♪
00:29:09 My dad wants me to apply to state schools,
00:29:11 but I was, um...
00:29:15 Well, I'd like to go somewhere else.
00:29:17 Oh.
00:29:18 Well, where do you want to go?
00:29:20 Well, I was accepted into, uh,
00:29:21 Berkeley College of Music in Boston.
00:29:24 Wow.
00:29:25 Congratulations.
00:29:28 Thank you.
00:29:31 Your dad says it's not practical, though.
00:29:35 Oh, I see.
00:29:37 Yeah.
00:29:39 He's probably just trying to do
00:29:40 what he thinks is best for you.
00:29:43 You're, uh--you're engaged.
00:29:48 Oh, no.
00:29:50 It's, um--it's a promise ring.
00:29:54 What--what is that?
00:29:57 Uh, it means I've promised to stay a virgin
00:30:00 until I'm married.
00:30:02 It's silly. It's okay.
00:30:03 No, no, I--I don't think so.
00:30:06 Oh.
00:30:08 Uh, well, you know, I should, um--
00:30:17 should keep going.
00:30:18 I have a lot of deliveries and stuff to do, so...
00:30:20 Okay.
00:30:21 Well, I'm sorry I wasn't very much help.
00:30:22 No, no, no, don't worry about it.
00:30:23 I'll--I'll figure it out.
00:30:25 And if you have any more questions, you have my number.
00:30:27 Yeah, yeah.
00:30:28 Or if you just want to hang out,
00:30:29 I mean, that would be fun, too.
00:30:32 Hang out?
00:30:35 Yeah, could grab some dinner,
00:30:37 see a movie or something fun.
00:30:40 Sure.
00:30:44 I mean, we don't have to if you don't want to.
00:30:45 No, no, no, we--we--we, um, yeah, yeah.
00:30:48 I, uh, need to--I need to check my schedule, you know,
00:30:50 but I'll--I'll give you a call.
00:30:51 Okay.
00:30:52 Yeah.
00:30:53 Okay.
00:30:54 All right.
00:30:56 [car horn honks]
00:31:02 I'll be right back with your receipts.
00:31:10 Hey.
00:31:13 I'm sorry for how I acted the other day.
00:31:20 [scoffs]
00:31:22 You should be.
00:31:28 I don't agree with this.
00:31:34 But if you're going to be coming by here a lot,
00:31:36 we can at least be civil.
00:31:39 Yeah.
00:31:48 [sighs]
00:31:51 Did your father ever hit you?
00:32:04 No, um, why are we doing this?
00:32:09 [sighs]
00:32:12 I'm trying to establish
00:32:15 if there's been any emotional trauma in your life,
00:32:19 something that happened a long time ago
00:32:20 that you may have forgotten about.
00:32:23 I don't think so.
00:32:25 I think I'd remember it.
00:32:26 No, not necessarily.
00:32:28 We often repress difficult or painful memories.
00:32:33 If something like that did happen,
00:32:35 if you were abused or mistreated, for instance,
00:32:39 that could help explain your situation now.
00:32:43 And if that's the case,
00:32:45 working on that might help you to transition back
00:32:49 to healthy heterosexual desires.
00:32:53 Like I'd be interested in girls?
00:32:57 I believe you already are, deep down.
00:33:01 That's what nature intended you to be.
00:33:03 Something just knocked you off course along the way.
00:33:07 I mean, I wasn't abused or molested or anything like that.
00:33:10 Okay, that's great.
00:33:13 We'll look for another explanation, then.
00:33:15 You and I can work on finding that together.
00:33:18 I want to help you, James,
00:33:20 but you have to want it, too.
00:33:23 I do.
00:33:29 Good.
00:33:30 Won't be easy.
00:33:31 You have to work at it.
00:33:32 You're gonna have to push yourself
00:33:34 toward healthy behavior.
00:33:36 Try to avoid temptation.
00:33:39 Everyone is different.
00:33:40 You may have tremendous success
00:33:41 and walk out of here a totally heterosexual young man,
00:33:45 or you may always struggle with your feelings.
00:33:49 ♪♪
00:33:59 ♪♪
00:34:09 ♪♪
00:34:19 ♪♪
00:34:29 ♪♪
00:34:38 Hello.
00:34:39 Hi. Hi. It's, uh-- It's James.
00:34:41 How are you?
00:34:42 Good. Good, good. I'm good.
00:34:45 Um...
00:34:47 Yeah, listen, I was, uh, thinking about what you said,
00:34:51 and I was wondering if maybe you, uh,
00:34:53 wanted to grab dinner tonight?
00:34:56 Yeah. Yeah, sure.
00:34:59 Um...
00:35:01 All right, sure. Sure, so 6 o'clock.
00:35:04 Yeah. All right, great. Great.
00:35:06 I'll see you then.
00:35:07 Okay. All right. Bye.
00:35:10 ♪♪
00:35:13 [Sighs]
00:35:15 ♪♪
00:35:18 [Knock on door]
00:35:19 Yeah?
00:35:20 I was heading into town.
00:35:21 I just wondered if you needed some supplies.
00:35:24 No. No, no, I'm fine.
00:35:26 You got my books, don't you?
00:35:27 Um, yeah.
00:35:28 I mean, I won't know until class starts.
00:35:30 Well, here.
00:35:31 If you need more, let me know.
00:35:33 Okay.
00:35:34 You going somewhere?
00:35:36 Yeah, I was going to, uh, grab dinner with Suzie.
00:35:39 Huh. Where you going?
00:35:41 Oh, um...
00:35:43 I don't know.
00:35:45 You should take her to Ruby's.
00:35:47 I know it doesn't look like much,
00:35:48 but the food's really good, honest.
00:35:51 Here. My treat.
00:35:54 Have a big time.
00:35:55 Thanks.
00:35:57 ♪♪
00:36:02 [Sighs]
00:36:04 ♪♪
00:36:11 ♪♪
00:36:19 ♪♪
00:36:25 ♪♪
00:36:32 ♪♪
00:36:39 ♪♪
00:36:42 Uh, we can go somewhere else.
00:36:44 No. No, this is fine.
00:36:46 There's lots of personality.
00:36:48 You sure?
00:36:49 Absolutely.
00:36:50 You kids want an appetizer?
00:36:52 What do you have?
00:36:53 Chips, pretzels, peanuts.
00:36:56 Oh.
00:36:57 I think we're okay for now.
00:36:58 All right.
00:36:59 Let me know when you're ready to order.
00:37:00 All right. Thank you.
00:37:02 ♪♪
00:37:06 I'm sorry.
00:37:08 Don't be.
00:37:09 My dad is always saying this place is a pit of sin,
00:37:11 so I've been dying to see why.
00:37:13 ♪♪
00:37:15 I'm kidding. It's fine. It's fine.
00:37:18 ♪♪
00:37:20 In fact, I wish you would have done this sooner.
00:37:24 Oh, yeah?
00:37:25 Yeah.
00:37:26 I wish you would have known each other in high school.
00:37:29 Yeah.
00:37:31 Just ran into different crowds, I guess.
00:37:34 You were always with, um, Brad Miller and Charlie Green.
00:37:39 Is it true what they said about Charlie?
00:37:43 ♪♪
00:37:45 What did they say?
00:37:47 Did you skip?
00:37:51 Um, I don't think I should reveal the details of other people's...
00:37:55 [ Gasps ]
00:37:56 That's crazy.
00:37:58 [ Laughs ]
00:37:59 Ow.
00:38:02 Does it bother you?
00:38:03 Mm-hmm.
00:38:05 I think people ought to be free to live their lives however they like.
00:38:09 ♪♪
00:38:15 Well, thanks again.
00:38:17 Yeah. Sure. Anytime.
00:38:20 I guess I'll see you around.
00:38:22 Yeah.
00:38:24 Um...
00:38:31 Oh.
00:38:32 I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
00:38:33 No, I'm sorry.
00:38:34 No, no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
00:38:36 I, uh...
00:38:37 I should get going.
00:38:38 No, no, no, no. Listen, listen, listen.
00:38:39 I, um...
00:38:43 I like to take things slower.
00:38:46 I think -- I think slow is better for me.
00:38:48 Okay.
00:38:49 Yeah.
00:38:50 Um...
00:38:52 But, look, I-I'd like for this to be a, uh...
00:38:57 You know, if you want.
00:39:00 Yeah, sure. You do.
00:39:01 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I do.
00:39:04 Okay. Well, I should get in there.
00:39:06 Yeah.
00:39:08 Bye.
00:39:09 Yeah. Okay.
00:39:11 [ Door closes ]
00:39:13 ♪♪
00:39:31 ♪♪
00:39:41 [ Sighs ]
00:39:43 ♪♪
00:39:50 You're still dreaming about girls?
00:39:52 Sexually?
00:39:58 Does anyone know why we have dreams?
00:40:02 Dreams are our brain's way of making sense
00:40:06 of the things that we experience during the day.
00:40:09 So if, for instance, we see a dog when we're awake
00:40:14 and we think about that dog,
00:40:16 we might dream about her at night
00:40:18 when our brain is sorting out those memories.
00:40:21 Does that make sense?
00:40:23 So if you're having sexual dreams about women at night,
00:40:27 it's probably because you're thinking about them sexually
00:40:31 during the day.
00:40:32 But I wasn't.
00:40:33 That's okay. It's okay.
00:40:35 Everyone slips up from time to time.
00:40:37 You just have to focus and try your best
00:40:40 to stay away from thoughts and situations
00:40:43 that will lead you down the wrong path.
00:40:45 Remember, your body wants you to be attracted
00:40:47 to the opposite sex.
00:40:49 Why is that?
00:40:55 Because that's what God intended.
00:40:58 I'm not sure I believe in God.
00:41:03 Well, that's okay, James.
00:41:06 He believes in you.
00:41:09 God made Adam and Eve,
00:41:13 one man and one woman,
00:41:14 because that's what's required to have a baby.
00:41:17 Not two men, not two women,
00:41:19 not three people of various genders.
00:41:21 One and one.
00:41:22 And that's not just true with people.
00:41:24 It's also true in the animal kingdom.
00:41:25 One male lion and one female lion can make a baby lion.
00:41:29 One male zebra and one female zebra can make a baby zebra.
00:41:32 One male shark--
00:41:33 All right, all right. I get it.
00:41:35 It's in your genes.
00:41:36 Your body wants you to be with a woman
00:41:39 so that you can make babies and carry on the species.
00:41:42 I don't think I want babies.
00:41:44 Well, maybe not right now,
00:41:47 but one day you will, when you're ready.
00:41:50 And you won't be able to have them with another woman.
00:41:56 [♪♪♪]
00:41:59 [man speaking indistinctly]
00:42:12 Okay, I mean, we were, you know, interested in, uh,
00:42:21 kind of taking your orchard in a different direction.
00:42:24 A lot of people in our area are starting to buy more organic,
00:42:26 and that's the direction they seem to be going.
00:42:28 That's true. A lot of the grocery stores, you know,
00:42:30 they've really got a lot of, uh, interest in it,
00:42:32 and, uh, I think they're paying a premium for organic apples.
00:42:35 Well, good luck with that, but the place ain't for sale.
00:42:38 Okay. Well, that's a shame.
00:42:40 We've got a beautiful property here.
00:42:42 Is there something we can do to change their mind?
00:42:44 No, I don't think so.
00:42:46 Okay, then.
00:42:49 You know, um, let me, let me, uh, give you my card,
00:42:53 and, uh, if, uh, you change your minds, give us a call.
00:42:56 You don't need to waste one of your cards.
00:42:58 No, please, keep it.
00:43:00 Thank you.
00:43:01 All right, well, good luck.
00:43:02 Thank you.
00:43:03 Hey.
00:43:19 Hey.
00:43:22 Who were those people?
00:43:23 A couple of weirdos.
00:43:25 Yeah?
00:43:26 Yeah.
00:43:27 What'd they want?
00:43:29 They wanted to buy the farm.
00:43:31 Great. Well, what'd you tell them?
00:43:37 What do you think I told them?
00:43:39 Say what they wanted to do with it?
00:43:45 They want to modernize it, go organic.
00:43:49 I told them the apples are already organic.
00:43:51 They come right out of the ground.
00:43:53 I think they meant they want to use less pesticides, Dad.
00:43:57 Well, they're not very good farmers, then, are they?
00:44:00 A lot of people are starting to think like them.
00:44:03 It's a fad. It'll pass.
00:44:05 I'm just saying we ought to look into it, that's all.
00:44:06 James, I appreciate you wanting to help,
00:44:09 but trust me when I say I know what the hell I'm doing, okay?
00:44:12 Now, when you're running the show,
00:44:14 you can grow apples any way you want.
00:44:16 Maybe then you'll find out your old man knew what he's talking about.
00:44:20 [clattering]
00:44:22 You still in your pajamas?
00:44:24 [engine starts]
00:44:31 [♪♪♪]
00:44:33 [engine starts]
00:44:45 [♪♪♪]
00:44:47 [car horn honks]
00:45:07 [door creaks]
00:45:14 [door closes]
00:45:16 [sighs]
00:45:30 [♪♪♪]
00:45:36 [sighs]
00:45:40 Sorry, I'm running behind today.
00:45:42 I'm sorry, I'm running behind you.
00:45:44 I ran into a door.
00:45:46 Charlie.
00:45:47 A couple of guys jumped me after work.
00:45:52 [sighs]
00:45:54 Here?
00:45:57 No.
00:45:58 Down the road.
00:46:00 I've been walking home since my car died.
00:46:01 No, you can't walk all the way back to your place from here.
00:46:04 Look, it won't happen again, okay?
00:46:05 I've got my guard up. It's time.
00:46:07 No, you're not walking anymore. Let me drive you.
00:46:09 James, I don't need an escort.
00:46:10 I don't care.
00:46:11 Time is your shift over.
00:46:12 James?
00:46:13 What time is your shift over?
00:46:15 Nine.
00:46:19 Okay.
00:46:20 See you at nine.
00:46:21 [laughing]
00:46:39 [indistinct chatter]
00:46:41 Hi.
00:46:49 Hey.
00:46:51 Uh, what's going on?
00:46:55 Just wanted to drop by and surprise you.
00:46:56 Hope that's okay.
00:46:57 Uh, yeah.
00:46:59 Sure.
00:47:00 Wow, it was nice talking to you.
00:47:02 Yeah, you too.
00:47:07 So, my parents wanted me to invite you to dinner tonight.
00:47:10 Oh.
00:47:12 Um...
00:47:13 You know, my dad actually is going to be cooking dinner tonight.
00:47:18 Oh.
00:47:19 Well, I just told him I was going to invite you to dinner with us
00:47:21 and he said he didn't mind eating alone.
00:47:23 Oh.
00:47:25 If you don't want to come, that's fine.
00:47:26 No, no, no. I do. I do.
00:47:28 Okay.
00:47:29 What time?
00:47:30 7.30.
00:47:31 Okay.
00:47:32 Great.
00:47:33 I'll see you then.
00:47:34 All right.
00:47:35 Bye.
00:47:37 [sighs]
00:47:39 Steak.
00:47:53 Getting pretty handy with the oven.
00:47:56 Actually, it's not bad.
00:47:57 Yeah.
00:47:58 Hey, you look nice.
00:47:59 Thanks.
00:48:00 Tell your girlfriend to come on over for dinner over here next time.
00:48:04 I mean, we keep practicing. I don't want to poison her.
00:48:06 [laughs]
00:48:07 Hey.
00:48:08 Your mom would be proud of you.
00:48:13 Have a good time.
00:48:21 [door creaks]
00:48:26 [door slams]
00:48:27 How are things at the farm, James?
00:48:40 We drive by there almost every day, don't we?
00:48:42 All the time.
00:48:43 Yeah. It's gorgeous.
00:48:44 It is.
00:48:45 So nice.
00:48:46 So what is it like working at an apple farm?
00:48:49 It's fine, I guess.
00:48:55 [music playing]
00:48:57 A lot of work.
00:49:01 I'll bet.
00:49:03 How long has it been in your family now?
00:49:05 A long time.
00:49:07 Yeah.
00:49:09 Isn't that something?
00:49:10 It's incredible.
00:49:11 All right.
00:49:12 It's only Fairhaven apples for us from now on.
00:49:14 [laughter]
00:49:16 And Susie tells us that you play music as well?
00:49:21 Yes. Yes, I do piano.
00:49:23 Oh, that's lovely.
00:49:24 You'll have to play something for us sometime.
00:49:26 Oh, gladly.
00:49:27 Do you have a piano?
00:49:29 No, we don't.
00:49:31 Oh.
00:49:32 James is going to take over the farm someday.
00:49:35 Oh.
00:49:36 Well, that's great.
00:49:37 It's very admirable.
00:49:39 Keeping the family business going.
00:49:41 A lot of kids these days, they want nothing to do with tradition.
00:49:44 As soon as they graduate school, pow, they're gone.
00:49:47 So true.
00:49:48 But it's good to hear you'll be staying in the area long term.
00:49:51 I mean, we wouldn't want you whisking our daughter off to God knows where.
00:49:54 Dad.
00:49:55 Oh, stop it.
00:49:56 You're going to scare him.
00:49:57 Oh, come on.
00:49:58 I'm kidding.
00:49:59 You know I'm joking, right, James?
00:50:00 Yes, sir.
00:50:01 I mean, come on.
00:50:02 It's not like I mentioned they're children.
00:50:03 [laughter]
00:50:05 What do you feel about children, huh?
00:50:07 Do you want some someday?
00:50:09 Is that clock right?
00:50:13 Yes.
00:50:14 Mm-hmm.
00:50:15 Sorry, I have to run.
00:50:17 Dinner was wonderful.
00:50:18 Thank you so much for everything.
00:50:21 James.
00:50:22 James.
00:50:26 Is everything OK?
00:50:27 Yeah, yeah.
00:50:28 Everything's fine.
00:50:29 Are you sure?
00:50:30 Yeah, I just forgot I have something to do at 9.
00:50:32 My dad was just joking around.
00:50:34 Oh, no, it's fine.
00:50:36 I gotta run.
00:50:37 [music playing]
00:50:41 [footsteps]
00:50:43 [music playing]
00:50:46 [music playing]
00:50:50 [car door opens]
00:50:52 [car driving]
00:50:55 [car door closes]
00:51:04 How bad is it?
00:51:18 Not bad.
00:51:20 Maybe you should start carrying mace.
00:51:22 I just need to get out of this town.
00:51:25 Still thinking of joining the circus?
00:51:27 Ha, that was a good idea.
00:51:29 No, it wasn't.
00:51:30 [laughs]
00:51:31 I could have been the most famous sword swallower
00:51:32 in all of America at this point.
00:51:33 Oh, yeah?
00:51:34 Why aren't you, then?
00:51:35 Because you wouldn't come with me.
00:51:43 [car driving]
00:51:46 Here, here, here.
00:51:58 I got it.
00:51:59 Thanks.
00:52:03 Sure.
00:52:08 See you tomorrow?
00:52:09 See you tomorrow.
00:52:10 [music playing]
00:52:28 [music playing]
00:52:31 [music playing]
00:52:34 [music playing]
00:52:52 [music playing]
00:52:55 [music playing]
00:53:10 [music playing]
00:53:20 [music playing]
00:53:23 What you felt for your boyfriend wasn't love.
00:53:33 It was lust.
00:53:36 You don't know that.
00:53:37 Love is different.
00:53:40 Think about your parents right now,
00:53:41 your mothers and your fathers.
00:53:42 Think about how they make you feel.
00:53:46 That's love.
00:53:47 Now, think about someone of the same sex
00:53:49 that you're attracted to.
00:53:50 It feels similar.
00:53:57 Sometimes we remember things the way we prefer them to be,
00:53:59 not the way they actually were.
00:54:01 From the way you described your relationship,
00:54:03 when you and your boyfriend were together,
00:54:05 you could hardly keep your clothes on.
00:54:07 That's not true love.
00:54:09 There's nothing pure or beautiful about that.
00:54:11 It's lust.
00:54:12 It's pleasures of the flesh.
00:54:15 If you were to run into your boyfriend again right now,
00:54:17 you'd probably yearn to be with him.
00:54:20 You'd want him to touch you, to hug you, to kiss you.
00:54:24 But that's the devil's influence.
00:54:26 Sin is very attractive.
00:54:28 You have to fight against it.
00:54:32 It's different with girls.
00:54:36 Sometimes.
00:54:37 Sure, you can lust after girls.
00:54:40 But you can also fall in love with one.
00:54:42 Believe me, that's worth waiting for.
00:54:45 You can't fall in love with a man.
00:54:47 It's impossible.
00:54:48 How do you know?
00:54:52 My father told me.
00:54:58 Right here.
00:55:01 You follow this, and you'll know the difference.
00:55:05 [music playing]
00:55:08 [music playing]
00:55:12 [music playing]
00:55:15 [thud]
00:55:27 [music playing]
00:55:38 [birds chirping]
00:55:41 Ah.
00:55:55 Oh, fuck.
00:55:57 God damn it.
00:55:58 Having trouble?
00:55:59 What the hell's it look like?
00:56:00 What's going on?
00:56:01 You all right over there?
00:56:05 Those yuppies came back again this morning.
00:56:09 Who?
00:56:10 The ones trying to buy the place.
00:56:13 I thought you told them no.
00:56:14 I did.
00:56:17 They thought maybe I'd changed my mind.
00:56:18 They gave me a better offer.
00:56:20 How much?
00:56:21 Doesn't matter.
00:56:22 Just curious.
00:56:23 Not enough.
00:56:26 The place is worth more than money.
00:56:27 Yeah, but how much money?
00:56:30 $750.
00:56:34 $750,000?
00:56:36 Uh-huh.
00:56:39 Says, dad, why'd you say no?
00:56:40 I told you.
00:56:41 No, no, no.
00:56:42 With that kind of money, we could do whatever we wanted.
00:56:44 I told you I'm not selling the place.
00:56:45 I can go to school, for God's sake.
00:56:46 James, I'm not going to discuss it anymore, all right?
00:56:49 You got chores to do, go do them.
00:56:50 Now.
00:56:55 Jesus.
00:56:59 Come on, you son of a bitch.
00:57:02 [music playing]
00:57:06 [music playing]
00:57:10 [music playing]
00:57:13 [music playing]
00:57:16 [music playing]
00:57:19 [music playing]
00:57:22 [music playing]
00:57:25 [music playing]
00:57:28 [music playing]
00:57:31 [music playing]
00:57:34 [music playing]
00:57:37 [ Music ]
00:58:06 >> Play that one your mom used to play.
00:58:07 You know the one I like.
00:58:10 [ Humming ]
00:58:23 I would like to hear that one again.
00:58:25 [ Music ]
00:58:37 >> Please.
00:58:38 [ Music ]
00:58:45 >> You won't even consider what I want.
00:58:47 All he cares about is his stupid family legacy.
00:58:51 >> It's your family too.
00:58:52 >> I don't care about it.
00:58:54 I want my own life.
00:58:55 With that kind of money I can do anything.
00:59:00 >> I guess there's only one thing left to do.
00:59:04 We'll have to kill him.
00:59:09 >> That's not funny.
00:59:10 >> It was a little funny.
00:59:11 >> No it wasn't.
00:59:13 >> Seriously though, I don't think you should let your dad choose what you want to do with your life.
00:59:18 >> What other choice do I have?
00:59:20 >> Tons.
00:59:21 You have nothing but choices.
00:59:22 I mean, what, so he won't make it easy for you?
00:59:24 Big deal.
00:59:25 Move out and do it on your own.
00:59:26 >> It's too hard.
00:59:27 >> Oh, boo-hoo, it's too hard.
00:59:29 So life's rough for a few years.
00:59:31 Then you'll be great.
00:59:33 Or you can just sit here, do what you're told, stay here and be miserable.
00:59:37 [ Music ]
01:00:00 >> Thanks for the ride.
01:00:01 >> Yeah, no problem.
01:00:04 Can I make it up to you?
01:00:07 >> No, don't worry about it.
01:00:10 >> Why don't we get a bite to eat sometime?
01:00:13 As friends.
01:00:14 Nothing weird, I promise.
01:00:25 >> When?
01:00:27 >> I'm free Saturday night.
01:00:36 >> All right.
01:00:40 >> Okay.
01:00:44 Pick me up at 6.
01:00:47 >> Yeah.
01:00:48 >> Okay.
01:00:52 See you.
01:01:07 [ Engine starts ]
01:01:11 [ Music ]
01:01:20 [ Phone rings ]
01:01:24 [ Music ]
01:01:27 [ Phone rings ]
01:01:30 [ Music ]
01:01:38 [ Music ]
01:01:58 >> Good?
01:02:01 >> Yeah.
01:02:05 My dad's been teaching himself how to cook.
01:02:08 He's not half bad now, actually.
01:02:12 >> See?
01:02:13 He doesn't need you.
01:02:19 >> No, he needs my help on the farm.
01:02:26 My mom would want me to stay.
01:02:28 >> Your mom would want you to live your life.
01:02:51 Hey.
01:02:57 What was it like there?
01:03:06 >> My dad found the place online.
01:03:16 I don't know if he even knew what he was looking for, but I think he knew that they were Christian therapists.
01:03:26 That was always a big part of my mom's life.
01:03:38 It wasn't so bad at first.
01:03:41 I had a lot of grief and anger.
01:03:45 I was mad at God and my mom, and they helped me get past that.
01:03:59 And they said if I wanted someone to blame, I really ought to blame myself.
01:04:08 They said that sometimes we don't live our lives according to God's plan.
01:04:15 He sends a sign to get us back on track.
01:04:21 >> How can you believe that?
01:04:23 >> I started to.
01:04:26 >> I'm so glad you're here.
01:04:46 >> Are you okay?
01:04:47 >> Yeah.
01:04:48 Yeah.
01:04:50 >> You're not as strong as you used to be.
01:04:56 >> What?
01:04:58 >> [Laughing]
01:05:05 >> What the hell?
01:05:08 >> [Laughing]
01:05:23 >> [Music]
01:05:38 >> Hey, hey.
01:05:53 This way.
01:06:06 >> [Music]
01:06:16 >> Why can't we say goodbye when we need to?
01:06:26 Why can't we say goodbye?
01:06:36 Why can't we say goodbye when we need to?
01:06:46 Why can't we say goodbye?
01:06:56 >> [Music]
01:07:11 >> James, you're going to sleep all day?
01:07:14 [Music]
01:07:29 [Phone ringing]
01:07:55 >> James!
01:08:05 [Knocking]
01:08:13 [Phone ringing]
01:08:23 [Music]
01:08:33 [Music]
01:08:43 [Music]
01:08:53 [Music]
01:09:03 >> I'm so glad you're here.
01:09:13 >> I'm so glad you're here.
01:09:23 >> I'm so glad you're here.
01:09:33 >> I'm so glad you're here.
01:09:43 >> I really missed you.
01:09:53 >> I missed you too.
01:09:54 >> What the hell is that?
01:09:55 >> Susie!
01:09:56 Susie!
01:09:58 Susie!
01:09:59 Susie, wait!
01:10:01 Susie!
01:10:03 Susie!
01:10:04 >> You're a bastard!
01:10:06 Don't touch me!
01:10:08 >> You listen to me?
01:10:13 >> You're disgusting.
01:10:14 You're pathetic.
01:10:15 Rot in hell.
01:10:17 >> Hey.
01:10:19 You okay?
01:10:21 >> Yeah.
01:10:23 I'm fine.
01:10:29 >> James?
01:10:31 >> Go wait in the truck.
01:10:38 >> Yeah.
01:10:40 [Door opening]
01:10:48 [Door closing]
01:10:52 [Door opening]
01:11:02 >> Hey.
01:11:06 Listen, that probably looked pretty bad.
01:11:10 I had to break up with Susie just now.
01:11:13 Charlie's a friend from --
01:11:14 >> Just stop.
01:11:20 >> I honestly have no idea what to do.
01:11:23 I mean, maybe if your mother was here, she would know,
01:11:26 but I have no idea.
01:11:31 >> About what?
01:11:32 >> About you.
01:11:35 About how to help you.
01:11:43 >> Help me with what?
01:11:44 >> To help you grow up, help you be a man.
01:11:49 I am a man.
01:11:50 >> Yeah, you're one hell of a man.
01:11:56 >> Go ahead.
01:11:58 Say it.
01:12:03 Go ahead, say it.
01:12:05 No, no, no, come on, I want you to.
01:12:10 Well, that's okay.
01:12:13 You were never the kind of man I wanted for a father either.
01:12:24 Mom saw you now.
01:12:26 She'd be ashamed, you know that?
01:12:27 >> That makes two of us, I guess.
01:12:29 >> I guess.
01:12:31 [Door closing]
01:12:33 [Music]
01:12:53 >> Well, look what the polecat dragged in.
01:12:56 [Music]
01:13:07 >> Awfully early to be pissed drunk.
01:13:10 >> You want my money or not?
01:13:16 >> I saw your boy in here a while back with a pretty girl.
01:13:18 >> He's my boy.
01:13:19 I don't even know him.
01:13:22 >> Well, I'm sure every father said that about their boy at some point or another.
01:13:25 >> Bullshit.
01:13:26 I minded my old man.
01:13:29 >> Didn't you tell me one time about when you were 17 you wanted to run away because your old man wouldn't let you join the army?
01:13:37 >> You don't remember as well as you think you do.
01:13:39 >> Oh, no?
01:13:40 >> No.
01:13:41 I was 18.
01:13:42 It was the marines.
01:13:44 And I would have made a damn fine one, too.
01:13:46 >> Of course you would.
01:13:49 You ever think about that?
01:13:52 >> What, marines?
01:13:53 >> Could have seen the world.
01:13:55 Never know where you would have ended up.
01:13:59 >> You don't always get what you want in this life.
01:14:05 >> So I hear there's this really nice couple poking around town lately.
01:14:10 Looking to buy up some land.
01:14:12 They been out to see you?
01:14:13 >> They have.
01:14:14 >> And how was their offer?
01:14:17 >> Insufficient.
01:14:20 >> That is a shame.
01:14:23 If there were more, you might be able to get out of the apple business.
01:14:27 Live a little.
01:14:29 >> I'm not a young man anymore.
01:14:31 >> Well, you're not worn out either.
01:14:42 >> See you around.
01:14:44 >> Take care, Ricky.
01:14:46 >> Don't be a stranger.
01:14:52 [car engine]
01:15:02 [sigh]
01:15:05 [car door opens]
01:15:08 [car engine]
01:15:16 [car door closes]
01:15:22 [music]
01:15:31 [music]
01:15:40 [music]
01:15:48 [music]
01:15:56 [music]
01:16:06 [music]
01:16:16 [music]
01:16:26 [music]
01:16:36 [music]
01:16:45 >> What about your dad?
01:16:49 >> I don't know.
01:16:54 I don't think I can go home.
01:16:56 >> You think he'll hurt you?
01:16:57 >> No.
01:16:58 No.
01:17:01 [sigh]
01:17:03 I just don't think he wants me there anymore.
01:17:06 >> Then stay with me.
01:17:11 >> It's not a permanent solution.
01:17:15 >> Then we'll leave.
01:17:17 >> Oh, yeah?
01:17:19 Where will we go?
01:17:22 >> I don't know.
01:17:24 Maybe the circus?
01:17:29 >> I'll just go in, pack my clothes, whatever else I need,
01:17:37 and leave.
01:17:46 And then the circus, okay?
01:17:52 [kiss]
01:17:54 [music]
01:18:15 >> There you go.
01:18:16 >> Thank you.
01:18:17 >> You're welcome.
01:18:18 Have a great day.
01:18:19 Hey, Rich.
01:18:20 >> Hey.
01:18:21 >> How's the Apple business?
01:18:22 >> Oh, it's fine.
01:18:23 It's just fine.
01:18:24 Listen, I'm sorry you're so late.
01:18:25 >> Don't worry about it.
01:18:26 I'll grab your receipt.
01:18:27 >> Thanks.
01:18:28 [music]
01:18:50 >> Oh, sure.
01:18:58 >> There you go.
01:19:00 >> So a lot of folks go for the organic?
01:19:02 >> Yeah, actually, they're very popular.
01:19:05 Let's see, Winston Clark switched to organic.
01:19:08 You know Winston.
01:19:09 >> Yeah.
01:19:10 >> Yeah.
01:19:11 And the Shelleys.
01:19:12 The Shelleys were here on Monday.
01:19:13 So they're thinking about it.
01:19:15 I'll see you later.
01:19:16 >> All right.
01:19:18 >> Hi.
01:19:19 How can I help you?
01:19:20 >> That's it.
01:19:21 >> All right.
01:19:25 Okay, that'll be $11.
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01:23:16 >> Play it better than she did.
01:23:20 >> I was, um --
01:23:21 >> James.
01:23:22 >> I was just leaving.
01:23:23 >> Just wait.
01:23:24 >> I really don't want to talk about this right now.
01:23:28 >> Sit down.
01:23:29 Please?
01:23:31 For a minute.
01:23:45 Where are you going?
01:23:49 >> I was thinking of going to Boston.
01:23:51 >> Alone?
01:23:53 >> No.
01:24:00 >> Is he -- what's his name again?
01:24:04 >> Charlie.
01:24:05 >> Charlie.
01:24:06 Is he the one from before?
01:24:10 >> Yeah.
01:24:17 >> Your mother and I were pretty concerned about that.
01:24:21 That's how you ended up at that place.
01:24:24 I'm sorry about that.
01:24:33 You care about each other?
01:24:38 >> Yeah.
01:24:40 Yeah, we do very much.
01:24:45 >> That's good.
01:24:50 I want to apologize for what I said yesterday.
01:24:52 That wasn't right.
01:24:56 I don't know if I'll ever understand it, but I think I can do a better job of accepting it.
01:25:09 >> Thank you.
01:25:17 >> I've decided to sell the farm.
01:25:23 >> What?
01:25:24 >> I took their offer.
01:25:26 >> Why?
01:25:27 Why did you --
01:25:28 >> You know, I've been running this place for the last 20 years for my dad when I should have been running it for you.
01:25:36 I'll give you some of the money.
01:25:38 You can go to school, move away, do whatever you want.
01:25:42 I guess I'll retire.
01:25:45 Anyway, the farm isn't family.
01:25:48 We are.
01:25:57 >> Dad, I'm sorry that things didn't really work out.
01:25:59 >> Dad, don't -- this life -- we'll just do the best we can, okay?
01:26:11 >> Okay.
01:26:40 >> You didn't miss it.
01:26:41 >> No, I still got about ten minutes.
01:26:43 >> Okay.
01:26:47 >> Well, I should -- you should --
01:26:48 >> Yeah.
01:27:09 >> I --
01:27:17 >> Call if you need anything.
01:27:19 >> I will.
01:27:21 >> Your mother would have been proud of you.
01:27:27 >> I am too.
01:27:44 >> Well, you better get going.
01:27:47 >> Yeah.
01:28:16 >> Bye.
01:28:18 >> Bye.
01:28:20 >> Bye.
01:28:22 [car engine starts]
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