Category
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TVTranscript
00:00:00 [no audio]
00:00:07 [typing]
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00:00:59 [screaming]
00:01:01 [screaming]
00:01:06 [screaming]
00:01:16 [screaming]
00:01:18 [music]
00:01:29 [music]
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00:02:01 [music]
00:02:06 [music]
00:02:11 [music]
00:02:15 Hello? Eddie?
00:02:17 [music]
00:02:26 [door opening]
00:02:28 [music]
00:02:30 [door closing]
00:02:32 [music]
00:02:36 [screaming]
00:02:38 [music]
00:02:40 [laughing]
00:02:45 You got me again!
00:02:46 Maddie, Maddie, Maddie.
00:02:48 Nuh-uh.
00:02:49 Come on, it's a fake knife.
00:02:51 I bring it every time I camp. It's an icebreaker.
00:02:54 Ray barely knows you and Jess doesn't get your sense of humor.
00:02:57 You're killing me.
00:02:59 Masks are strong. Totem's in horror.
00:03:02 Is this a good idea?
00:03:04 The mask? Yes, 100%.
00:03:06 No! Camping!
00:03:08 Maybe we should just do like Jess suggested and rent a hotel room.
00:03:11 Okay, if Jagger can spend ten days roughing it in the wilderness,
00:03:14 it would probably be a good idea for you to get some glamping out of the way
00:03:17 before marrying him.
00:03:19 Personally, I think the mistake was inviting TNA.
00:03:23 Don't call them that.
00:03:25 She's eccentric.
00:03:27 Eccentric? Single, white, female.
00:03:30 Besides, if it costs me, it's for like, what, a year?
00:03:33 And she's planning this whole thing?
00:03:34 It's not the bachelorette party.
00:03:36 Well, she shouldn't be planning anything.
00:03:38 We just happen to be going camping the same weekend Jagger is.
00:03:42 It's a bit synchronistic, don't you think?
00:03:44 Plus, Matt said he's going solo.
00:03:48 You know he's up there partying with his friends.
00:03:51 Child, no.
00:03:53 [door creaks]
00:03:57 [heavy breathing]
00:04:03 Ever since we were kids, a dark cloud has followed Jagger.
00:04:08 Until he met you.
00:04:11 It's so amazing you've always been able to see past his history.
00:04:14 He's always been honest about it.
00:04:16 His mom.
00:04:19 His dad.
00:04:21 His ex.
00:04:23 [screams]
00:04:25 And the real killer's still out there, you know?
00:04:27 Can't believe he was a suspect.
00:04:29 I don't think about it.
00:04:32 Less people at the wedding.
00:04:34 That's not funny.
00:04:37 No, of course not. I just...
00:04:41 What?
00:04:43 Look, um...
00:04:46 I just...
00:04:48 I want you to make sure you know what you're getting into before saying "I do."
00:04:52 You know, until death do you part.
00:04:57 It's my dad's car. I can pack extra if I want.
00:05:00 If something needs to go on the roof, we'll put it on the roof.
00:05:02 Like Eddie.
00:05:05 Where is the tent?
00:05:07 Try Hard said she's bringing one.
00:05:09 It's gonna be so fun!
00:05:13 Wow!
00:05:14 Look at both of you!
00:05:15 Adorable!
00:05:17 Did you make those?
00:05:19 She got you guys shirts too.
00:05:21 Here you go.
00:05:23 That's amazing!
00:05:26 [laughs]
00:05:28 [music]
00:05:30 [gasps]
00:05:33 So sweet.
00:05:35 So thoughtful.
00:05:37 And just pink is my favorite color.
00:05:40 Camping!
00:05:42 [cheers]
00:05:44 [groans]
00:05:47 You know, we could jump on a plane and be at a beach a lot quicker.
00:05:51 And that would also cost us a fortune.
00:05:53 Besides, there's a surprise.
00:05:56 What surprise?
00:05:57 No, we'll do whatever you want. It's your weekend.
00:05:59 No, it's our weekend.
00:06:01 Ah, just lost my signal.
00:06:03 Shit. Do you know where we're going?
00:06:05 I wouldn't get our girl lost.
00:06:07 Okay, well I think we should ask someone.
00:06:09 What? Ask where we're camping? Have you ever seen a horror movie?
00:06:12 No cell service. Asking for directions.
00:06:15 Not exactly how I want to be fucked.
00:06:19 I know where we're going!
00:06:23 Oh, I know!
00:06:24 List of stupid things people do in horror movies.
00:06:27 Make dumbass lists.
00:06:30 You killed that.
00:06:33 Don't swim in shark infested waters.
00:06:36 Don't open doors to other people.
00:06:38 Don't have sex.
00:06:39 Screw that.
00:06:41 Don't assume that a crazy person is harmless.
00:06:44 Don't investigate strange noises.
00:06:46 Don't split up.
00:06:47 No, no one is splitting up.
00:06:49 Buddy check.
00:06:50 Buddy check!
00:06:55 You too, Eddie. Thank you for doing this.
00:06:59 What are best friends for?
00:07:09 What the fuck was that?
00:07:29 Oh, yes, here. Right here.
00:07:32 And surprise!
00:07:34 Wait, they're all staying in one tent?
00:07:37 Who?
00:07:38 We're all in one tent.
00:07:40 But that's just two tents for all of us. What if we want to hook up with someone?
00:07:45 Whose tent is that?
00:07:46 Oh, like you didn't know Jagger and his friends would be up here.
00:07:49 I didn't.
00:07:51 Are we okay to be here? He wanted to go by himself.
00:07:53 He told me the GPS. Yes.
00:07:56 That looks like it's been here a while.
00:08:00 Wait, where's their cars?
00:08:02 Probably in town at the bar.
00:08:05 There's a bar?
00:08:08 Is it going to rain?
00:08:10 It's all part of the fun. Welcome to the mountains.
00:08:14 I brought a freaking key lock for possible lockers by a pool.
00:08:17 Where are we?
00:08:19 And the bathrooms?
00:08:24 Oh, no way.
00:08:25 Eddie, what's the bucket for?
00:08:29 Um...
00:08:32 It goes with this.
00:08:35 I am not doing baljebra in a bucket.
00:08:39 You did want to do something wild.
00:08:41 Wild, like the bears.
00:08:44 Bears?
00:08:45 This is great, Eddie.
00:08:49 Yeah.
00:08:51 Ah.
00:08:52 Hey, peeps. If you're sitting there wondering what the hell I got up to this weekend,
00:08:57 I was in the middle of nowhere.
00:08:59 Dodging bears.
00:09:01 And if I die, this will be a part of my found footage.
00:09:05 You deserve so much better.
00:09:07 Hey, can we keep the phone in the car?
00:09:10 This is supposed to be back to basics.
00:09:12 Okay, I did not remember Maddie or anyone agreeing to shitting in a bucket.
00:09:17 Oh, hey, do you want to go out for the weekend and shit in a damn bucket?
00:09:21 Oh, wow, that sounds aces.
00:09:24 The bucket kind of stinks.
00:09:25 Literally. Literally stinks.
00:09:27 We use bags in the bucket.
00:09:29 Oh, that's so much better.
00:09:31 It'd be nice to have some mementos for Maddie to remember this by.
00:09:34 Pictures, not poops.
00:09:37 Okay, it's settled. Rain, I will pay for a hotel.
00:09:39 This will be fun.
00:09:40 It will, I promise.
00:09:42 And, as for pictures, enough film and flash for days.
00:09:49 Come on.
00:09:52 [sighs]
00:09:54 Okay, that's cool.
00:10:01 I'll keep it in my bag with me.
00:10:03 I gotta make sure to keep certain things close by.
00:10:06 [laughs]
00:10:08 Oh, yes.
00:10:10 Found the shower.
00:10:12 [rock music]
00:10:15 ♪ I need a lover to take me home ♪
00:10:17 ♪ I can't stop, I just can't find home ♪
00:10:20 ♪ I think about you all the time ♪
00:10:22 ♪ And I just can't seem to make you mine ♪
00:10:25 ♪ Now go, yeah, go ♪
00:10:30 I don't think this is right.
00:10:33 ♪ Go, go, go, go ♪
00:10:35 [all cheer]
00:10:38 Bringing wood out here would be like bringing water to an ocean.
00:10:41 I bring water to the ocean, I bring water to the pool.
00:10:44 I bring water.
00:10:46 There were no fire signs all over.
00:10:48 Trust me, I've got it all figured out.
00:10:52 What are you, SWAT now?
00:10:54 Did you hear that?
00:10:56 No, Eddie, Eddie, no, we're not supposed to investigate strange sounds.
00:11:03 It sounds like something's in pain.
00:11:06 Eddie!
00:11:15 All right, come on, whatever, let's go.
00:11:18 [screams]
00:11:21 [laughs]
00:11:25 Oh, my gosh.
00:11:27 She's so funny.
00:11:29 Ew.
00:11:33 Gross.
00:11:34 All right, you already got us once.
00:11:35 I'm not falling for it.
00:11:37 No, really.
00:11:39 Maddie, come here.
00:11:42 Oh, yuck, guys.
00:11:44 What would do this?
00:11:45 What is it?
00:11:46 Come on.
00:11:47 Oh, God, no, no, no, no, no.
00:11:48 Maybe the guys are back by now.
00:11:50 What a wreck.
00:11:57 Ray, come on!
00:11:59 [sighs]
00:12:07 The four F's-- food, friends, big fire, just, uh, waiting on the fish.
00:12:13 [laughs]
00:12:15 I would have thought they would have been here by now.
00:12:18 Anyone else cold?
00:12:19 No, of course not.
00:12:21 Tell your mom this one is a definite yes.
00:12:25 Sure you don't want to try?
00:12:27 Mm-mm.
00:12:29 To Maddie.
00:12:31 To Maddie.
00:12:34 To Maddie.
00:12:36 Cheers.
00:12:37 Cheers.
00:12:38 Thank you, guys.
00:12:40 Thank you, Eddie.
00:12:41 I'd never have come out here without my girls.
00:12:44 Aw.
00:12:45 [sighs]
00:12:46 Maybe we can use our socks as mittens.
00:12:49 Here, I have an extra pair of gloves.
00:12:51 Oof, thank you.
00:12:52 We just need to, um, make sure to clean all this up before we go to bed.
00:12:56 Okay, Mom.
00:12:57 Ooh, are your parents going to ground us?
00:12:59 My parents are dead.
00:13:01 Ouch.
00:13:08 I'm so sorry.
00:13:11 [laughs]
00:13:14 Her parents aren't dead.
00:13:16 She told me she visited them a couple days ago.
00:13:19 [laughs]
00:13:20 She gets me in jags all the time.
00:13:23 [laughs]
00:13:25 No, really.
00:13:27 We have to make sure to do certain things or else we could have tried.
00:13:30 [gasps]
00:13:31 [dramatic music]
00:13:33 [footsteps]
00:13:35 [music]
00:13:42 [gun cocks]
00:13:48 [music]
00:13:50 Hell of a surprise, Ed.
00:14:00 This is where we're supposed to be.
00:14:01 How did I know it wasn't their tent?
00:14:04 There's your pair, Ray.
00:14:07 There's your wild man, Jess.
00:14:09 Funny enough, he's our stripper.
00:14:11 [laughs]
00:14:12 Did you see the pole?
00:14:14 I saw the gun.
00:14:15 Maybe we should move.
00:14:17 I say we just chill here and deal with it tomorrow.
00:14:20 Nothing has changed.
00:14:21 Nothing has changed?
00:14:23 Except now maybe we are feet away from a homicidal maniac.
00:14:30 [laughs]
00:14:32 I got you.
00:14:35 [laughs]
00:14:37 What if it is their tent?
00:14:40 Oh, God.
00:14:42 They probably saw him and set up somewhere else.
00:14:46 I think we should find the guys.
00:14:48 If we let this guy kill our pre-batch party, then he wins, right?
00:14:55 We have just as much a right to be here as he does.
00:14:59 Maddie, it's your weekend.
00:15:01 What do you want to do?
00:15:03 [cheers]
00:15:09 [music]
00:15:11 [music]
00:15:31 Old friggin' forest.
00:15:33 Can we just turn this crap off and put on something good?
00:15:38 [groans]
00:15:39 You're such a butt kill, Jess.
00:15:42 [groans]
00:15:43 How about we take something off?
00:15:52 No.
00:15:53 What? Am I the only one with balls?
00:16:00 I just figured you'd show us at some point.
00:16:02 [groans]
00:16:04 Really? No one? No one has--
00:16:07 Fine. Fuck it. I call.
00:16:10 [laughs]
00:16:12 Jess.
00:16:13 Oh.
00:16:14 Nicely played, Jess.
00:16:18 And...
00:16:20 I raise you.
00:16:24 No, Eddie, don't.
00:16:33 I don't think that had the desired effect you were going for.
00:16:37 What about you, Maddie? You came out here to get wild, right?
00:16:43 I would, but not in front of him.
00:16:45 Doing it in front of a stranger is what makes it liberating.
00:16:49 Stranger? I'm no stranger.
00:16:53 Help! We're going!
00:16:56 You need new earmuffs.
00:16:58 Okay, let's all put our shirts back on. Come on.
00:17:01 Eddie, please.
00:17:03 I should be reading.
00:17:04 No! Don't. He's just messing with us.
00:17:08 He's just a big, fat goofball.
00:17:10 [growls]
00:17:12 Come on. Stop it. Put it on. Please.
00:17:17 Come on. It's freezing.
00:17:19 Fine.
00:17:27 When you're done, put your food stuff in the bear box.
00:17:31 A bear box?
00:17:32 It's also for the raccoons.
00:17:34 Oh, I love raccoons.
00:17:36 All right, we'll just keep the food in the car.
00:17:38 You could. Would it be mansplaining to tell you that I've seen big-ass bears rip doors off of cars just like that
00:17:44 to get at an old, greasy french fry in a bucket seat?
00:17:48 Hell, even I can smell the grease emanating.
00:17:53 Come on, you're helping.
00:17:55 Fuck.
00:17:56 You didn't use that one?
00:17:57 Nah, this is mine.
00:17:59 Real nice. Real neighborly.
00:18:02 20 feet that way, past your ass, there's another one. I guess you used that one.
00:18:06 Oh, guess? Now we're his guest?
00:18:10 This guy.
00:18:12 We're done talking to you, creep.
00:18:14 What do we do with the trash?
00:18:16 Grab it out. Bear box.
00:18:19 Or you bag it hanging from a tree 10 feet up.
00:18:24 We should bounce.
00:18:26 Where?
00:18:27 God, find the guys, air out the car anywhere.
00:18:31 Not just the food that smells.
00:18:33 Is that some sexist remark?
00:18:35 Y'all smell like a potpourri of floral farts at a farmer's market.
00:18:39 Okay, Grandpa.
00:18:42 I'll find the bear box.
00:18:45 All right, seriously, come on, guys, we should go find someplace warm.
00:18:47 Yeah.
00:18:48 I wouldn't leave if I were you, Jess.
00:18:50 Not gonna find your way back.
00:18:53 How do you know my name?
00:18:55 Everyone within half a mile knows all of your names.
00:18:58 You're Jess.
00:19:00 The one getting married is Maddie.
00:19:02 Okay, let's go. Come on.
00:19:04 Yeah.
00:19:05 Hey, you two go. We'll be fine.
00:19:08 Are you sure?
00:19:09 Yeah, just drive around a little and then come back.
00:19:11 You're sure this is what you want?
00:19:13 Yes. Hurry back.
00:19:15 Okay.
00:19:16 Okay. Bye.
00:19:19 Love you.
00:19:20 Love you.
00:19:21 [screaming]
00:19:23 Eddie!
00:19:25 [laughing]
00:19:26 Fucking thing.
00:19:28 Missed.
00:19:31 Okay, I'm done with it. I'll put it back in the truck.
00:19:36 One day, I'm going to get it like a big house, flying down on her.
00:19:41 We'll see you in a few minutes, okay?
00:19:43 Go.
00:19:45 Love you.
00:19:46 Be safe.
00:19:47 [laughing]
00:19:51 They're still warming up to you.
00:19:53 Yeah.
00:19:54 You think we're safe?
00:19:58 You'd be surprised what I can do with it.
00:20:02 I have to go take a wee, so just--
00:20:04 Oh, wear this so I can see you.
00:20:07 Where'd you get that, by the way?
00:20:09 It was a gift I never wear.
00:20:11 Flashlight. It's dark.
00:20:13 Oh, thanks, Eddie. You're the best.
00:20:18 [♪♪♪]
00:20:21 [♪♪♪]
00:20:24 [♪♪♪]
00:20:27 [♪♪♪]
00:20:30 [♪♪♪]
00:20:33 [♪♪♪]
00:20:36 [♪♪♪]
00:20:39 [♪♪♪]
00:20:42 [♪♪♪]
00:20:45 [♪♪♪]
00:20:48 [clattering]
00:20:50 Oh, crap.
00:20:52 [clattering]
00:20:55 [clattering]
00:20:58 Huh. Oh.
00:21:00 Okay.
00:21:02 Come on.
00:21:04 Let the river flow.
00:21:06 Let the river flow.
00:21:11 Okay.
00:21:14 [screaming]
00:21:16 Turn that off!
00:21:17 Eddie?
00:21:18 Turn it off!
00:21:19 Eddie!
00:21:20 Turn it on!
00:21:22 Eddie?
00:21:24 Eddie!
00:21:26 Are you okay?
00:21:27 What happened?
00:21:29 I went over to talk to him.
00:21:32 Why?
00:21:33 I just thought I should apologize.
00:21:39 I heard a chain--
00:21:41 He was cutting something up.
00:21:43 In the dark?
00:21:45 [indistinct chatter]
00:21:51 Hey, it's okay.
00:21:53 You're okay.
00:21:55 I wish they'd get back here already.
00:21:58 So we're not going back?
00:22:01 We've been lost for hours.
00:22:03 We are near empty.
00:22:05 I'm not sleeping in the car.
00:22:07 Or did you miss the part about the bears literally ripping the doors off?
00:22:10 Because I wear honeysuckle deodorant, Ray.
00:22:12 Honey fucking suckle!
00:22:16 This place is creepy.
00:22:18 It's the only place we've seen.
00:22:31 Aw, he's so cute.
00:22:38 [screaming]
00:22:43 Stop!
00:22:44 You're going to give me a heart attack.
00:22:46 You okay, Peppercorn baby?
00:22:48 You okay?
00:22:49 Did they scare my baby?
00:22:53 I don't know what crappy carrier you have, but GPS always nearly work.
00:22:58 Anywhere.
00:23:00 I'm sorry.
00:23:02 How do you pronounce that?
00:23:05 This?
00:23:07 H-X-B, how would you pronounce it?
00:23:11 Heck-a-ba?
00:23:14 Hot Cross Buns.
00:23:16 Like karaoke, eh?
00:23:18 Yeah, you can see me do my thing every Wednesday, 7 to midnight, down at the bar.
00:23:24 I mean, I'm in rotation with whoever shows up.
00:23:27 But we love our snoopler.
00:23:29 Helps if you can carry a tune.
00:23:32 Me, me, me, me.
00:23:34 But unfortunately, that don't stop most.
00:23:39 We actually don't have any gas.
00:23:41 Gas opens at 8, and as far as calling the police to help you find your pals, we don't have cops.
00:23:47 We have a sheriff and rangers.
00:23:50 Your phone's really unworkin'?
00:23:53 Tell us we're nuts.
00:23:56 I'm just a dumb local, but, um...
00:24:01 Hey, they weren't working a minute ago.
00:24:04 Yep, we have running water, electricity, and flushable toilets.
00:24:08 Oh, grr!
00:24:10 Okay, wait, I don't have service day anymore.
00:24:17 Me either. How am I supposed to download my notes?
00:24:20 Okay, you try going that way, and I'll try going this way. Let's see if we have signal.
00:24:23 Okay.
00:24:25 Yep, I got service again.
00:24:27 Yeah, me too!
00:24:29 Okay, wait, so let's switch and see if it stays the same.
00:24:31 Yeah, yeah. Good idea.
00:24:33 Left me hangin'.
00:24:36 Yeah, I still got it.
00:24:39 Yeah, me too.
00:24:40 Alright, well, weird.
00:24:42 Let's go.
00:24:44 Wait, mine dropped out.
00:24:46 Mine too.
00:24:48 What the?
00:24:51 Oh, it's back.
00:24:53 Oh my gosh.
00:24:55 Boo!
00:24:56 Yeah, I know. I'm creepy.
00:24:59 No, seriously, you should lock your doors.
00:25:04 You young generations always staring at your phones, never paying attention.
00:25:09 And keep it quiet out here, or I'm gonna wake up Peppercorn.
00:25:13 Jesus Christ, this is crazy.
00:25:18 Do you have a tampon? I think I might be sinking with the moon or something out here.
00:25:22 Yeah, if I keep it back here.
00:25:24 Okay, good. Just want to be prepared.
00:25:26 Wait, what the fuck is this?
00:25:29 I don't know. It's your dad's truck.
00:25:31 There's a button.
00:25:32 Okay, I'm gonna just turn it off.
00:25:34 Okay.
00:25:36 Hey.
00:25:38 My service is back.
00:25:39 Mine too.
00:25:40 That's a cell phone jammer.
00:25:42 Eddie.
00:25:45 [♪♪♪]
00:25:48 Eddie?
00:26:12 [♪♪♪]
00:26:15 Eddie?
00:26:16 Eddie?
00:26:19 [♪♪♪]
00:26:22 Jess?
00:26:23 Ray?
00:26:27 Ha ha, come on, guys. This isn't funny.
00:26:31 [♪♪♪]
00:26:38 [♪♪♪]
00:26:41 Hello?
00:26:44 [screams]
00:26:53 Eddie! I thought I heard a gunshot. Are you okay?
00:26:56 What is that?
00:27:02 I found it with your vest.
00:27:04 What are you talking about? What? What do you have a gun? Is that his?
00:27:07 I got up to pee and I looked over and I saw him. And he had your vest.
00:27:11 How could he have my vest? It was in her tent.
00:27:13 I know. I don't know how he got it.
00:27:16 He was jerking off into it.
00:27:20 He what?
00:27:21 And the gun was just laying there.
00:27:22 I heard a gunshot.
00:27:24 Yeah, I ran over and I picked up the gun and I shot it in the air and he ran off.
00:27:27 And a gun? A chainsaw?
00:27:31 What else does this guy have in his tent?
00:27:33 You shouldn't have that.
00:27:35 You want me to give it back to him?
00:27:38 I don't know!
00:27:40 God, I wish Dagger was here already.
00:27:43 And where are Jess and Ray?
00:27:45 What if they did come back last night?
00:27:52 Would it really be that hard for a guy that big to just kill them and dump the truck somewhere?
00:28:03 I mean, what if that is Dagger's tent?
00:28:07 If this is one of your stupid jokes...
00:28:10 You think I'm lying?
00:28:11 I will be so pissed at you if this is, okay?
00:28:13 What is that?
00:28:15 Eddie, please, stay here. Eddie!
00:28:18 You saw me put this in the back of the truck.
00:28:27 How could it be here, Matz?
00:28:31 [heavy breathing]
00:28:33 What are you doing?
00:28:41 Making sure he doesn't have more things to kill us with.
00:28:44 That's a heavy duty fork. That's what Jess has been wanting all weekend.
00:28:51 Sorry, I joke when I'm nervous.
00:28:59 What are you doing?
00:29:01 Eddie!
00:29:03 Eddie!
00:29:04 I'm checking for weapons in case he comes back.
00:29:07 Is that blood on my vest?
00:29:25 [laughs]
00:29:27 It's stage blood, right?
00:29:31 When I told you I didn't care about this vest, you figured...
00:29:35 Bravo, Eddie. Bravo.
00:29:38 We have to stick together.
00:29:40 I'm not falling for it.
00:29:42 I'm telling you the truth!
00:29:45 [heavy breathing]
00:29:47 [laughs]
00:30:01 [coughing]
00:30:03 You can call the Rangers, but even with reservists, they don't have the resources.
00:30:20 Besides bear boxes, you remember anything? The camp?
00:30:24 There was a man camping there.
00:30:26 He was big, like ex-football player big.
00:30:29 Ex-ex-ex-football player big.
00:30:31 I mean, a tall white guy, he had a deep voice and a really dirty looking tent.
00:30:36 He had a gun and he was eating tuna out of a can.
00:30:39 That was gross. And a hat.
00:30:41 Ooh, and a fishing pole.
00:30:43 Wait. You could be talking about Ed.
00:30:46 Ed Rogers. Used to be a rich big shot.
00:30:50 Theme parks or something.
00:30:52 Sounded like his second wife did him dirty and hard.
00:30:56 [music]
00:30:58 He's so pathetic.
00:31:04 I'm gonna melt down that dinosaur.
00:31:08 Is he really gonna go live in the woods?
00:31:10 Hopefully he'll go extinct.
00:31:12 [laughing]
00:31:14 Maybe he killed her for all I know.
00:31:20 Said he liquefied everything.
00:31:23 Bought this huge site between state and federal land.
00:31:26 Contained the old Chilton's campground.
00:31:28 Quiet guy.
00:31:30 If you were camping next to Mr. Rogers, you were camping on his land.
00:31:35 Every two weeks we see him.
00:31:38 Stays a day or two.
00:31:40 Does his laundry, does his town business.
00:31:43 Actually, I just saw his nephew this past Friday.
00:31:48 Good looking kid from your neck of the world.
00:31:51 Hmm. Jimmy?
00:31:53 Juggie.
00:31:54 Jackie?
00:31:55 Jagger?
00:31:56 Yeah, that's it. Jagger.
00:31:59 Killer smile.
00:32:01 That guy is Jagger's uncle?
00:32:06 Okay, this is getting weirder.
00:32:09 Do you know where his tent is?
00:32:18 I'm actually starting to like that mask there.
00:32:21 Like a friend standing guard.
00:32:24 So stupid.
00:32:28 [screams]
00:32:42 Oh man.
00:32:43 You scared me.
00:32:44 Good. Got you back.
00:32:47 You were working today.
00:32:48 Off early.
00:32:50 Your parents live on a dirt road?
00:32:53 My friend wanted to go hiking.
00:32:55 Long story.
00:32:57 You know what? You and I should go camping.
00:32:59 By ourselves. Screw Jagger.
00:33:01 Yes! We should bring Jess and Ray.
00:33:04 Jess's father's an outdoorsy guy. He's got a tent and stuff.
00:33:07 I thought...
00:33:08 I think the last place they went camping had a pool and tennis courts.
00:33:12 That's called cheap vacationing.
00:33:15 I thought it could just be you and me.
00:33:17 I have all sorts of camping stuff.
00:33:19 I love this idea. Just the four of us.
00:33:21 In the woods, having a good time.
00:33:23 It would be so much easier...
00:33:25 It'd be like a pre-bachelorette party.
00:33:28 Yes!
00:33:31 Yes!
00:33:33 Aw! You so get me.
00:33:36 You know, if I wasn't marrying Jagger, I would so marry you.
00:33:42 Major and my best friend.
00:33:46 They're back!
00:33:54 Where have you two been?
00:33:59 Someone thought it was funny to put a cell phone jammer in the car.
00:34:02 Where is she?
00:34:04 Eddie, come out here!
00:34:07 I borrowed it as a gag. I knew where we were going.
00:34:11 You mean we can call?
00:34:13 No, not here, but everywhere else in this...
00:34:15 It was a joke!
00:34:17 And someone said that they saw Jagger on Friday, so he's up here somewhere.
00:34:20 Yeah, at least you didn't lie about that. Eddie, get out here!
00:34:23 Okay, it was a bad joke, but I didn't lie about it.
00:34:26 I never said I didn't know why our phones weren't working.
00:34:29 You missed a lot.
00:34:31 You missed a lot.
00:34:32 That big guy is Jag's uncle.
00:34:36 Who's Jagger's uncle?
00:34:37 His name is Ed Rogers.
00:34:39 Mr. Rogers? Like the sweater dude? You're kidding.
00:34:43 Nope.
00:34:44 What were you saying?
00:34:46 She told me he attacked her with a chainsaw.
00:34:49 I did not say that. I said I screamed when I heard the chainsaw.
00:34:55 And the gun, the blood.
00:34:56 Wait, gun?
00:34:57 Blood?
00:34:58 You nailed it.
00:35:01 Stage blood.
00:35:03 And the gun's fake too?
00:35:04 Well, it's not fake, but...
00:35:06 What is wrong with you?
00:35:07 I'm not supposed to tell you guys.
00:35:10 Now that is disturbing.
00:35:13 It's not all me.
00:35:16 Look, Jag's planned this, and the big guy's in on it too.
00:35:21 Anyway, when I saw him this morning, he said he was going hunting for raccoons,
00:35:25 and if I heard a gunshot, I should make up something nefarious.
00:35:28 And he gave me his gun to hold onto.
00:35:30 Is it loaded?
00:35:32 I don't know.
00:35:33 Want to check?
00:35:34 No, I don't want to check.
00:35:36 Why would anyone want to hunt raccoons?
00:35:39 Wait, why do you have it?
00:35:40 You guys did all say you wanted a weekend to remember.
00:35:43 Ta-da!
00:35:45 I knew it!
00:35:47 Yes!
00:35:48 I'm very sorry about the phone thing.
00:35:51 I didn't know you guys were going to get lost.
00:35:53 We had to stay at some random cabin last night until we could get gas.
00:35:58 And now we have gas, so we should just hit the road, you know?
00:36:03 No, no, no. I love that Jagger thought of this.
00:36:06 I mean, where is he?
00:36:08 Give me the keys. I'll go find him.
00:36:10 No fucking way.
00:36:11 We should go with you.
00:36:12 Look, I don't know everything, but I was told to just keep you guys here and to say and do certain things.
00:36:18 Alright, whatever. I'm just going to change out of these clothes.
00:36:27 Me too.
00:36:28 I don't know when I became the bad guy.
00:36:33 It was all for you.
00:36:35 I love you guys.
00:36:38 You, you are good.
00:36:41 You got me.
00:36:43 I love you, baby!
00:36:47 [baby crying]
00:36:50 [music]
00:36:53 [music]
00:36:56 [music]
00:36:59 [music]
00:37:01 [music]
00:37:04 [music]
00:37:07 [music]
00:37:10 [music]
00:37:13 [music]
00:37:16 [music]
00:37:19 [music]
00:37:22 [music]
00:37:26 ♪ ♪
00:37:33 ♪ ♪
00:37:40 ♪ ♪
00:37:47 ♪ ♪
00:38:02 [car horn honks]
00:38:04 [car engine starts]
00:38:06 [car engine stops]
00:38:08 [car engine starts]
00:38:10 [car engine stops]
00:38:12 [car door opens]
00:38:14 [car door closes]
00:38:16 [car door closes]
00:38:18 Hey, where's Maddie?
00:38:20 She thinks I'm at my parents.
00:38:22 [laughs]
00:38:23 You mean your dead parents.
00:38:25 I can stay for a night or two, but then I gotta...
00:38:27 Eddie!
00:38:28 What the fuck?
00:38:30 You gave me the GPS to meet you up here.
00:38:33 You asked me where I was going in front of her.
00:38:35 After you lied about how much you love camping.
00:38:38 [zipper zips]
00:38:40 I'm getting married.
00:38:45 It doesn't change the flavor of the beer.
00:38:48 Where are the bathrooms? I really gotta tinkle.
00:38:54 [laughs]
00:38:57 You're kidding.
00:38:59 I'll wait.
00:39:01 So how was it last night?
00:39:04 Got up here late, so I stayed at a cabin.
00:39:07 Set up this morning.
00:39:09 This is a test.
00:39:12 You, being here.
00:39:14 You said you loved me.
00:39:16 Okay, whatever I said, I said during sex.
00:39:19 Before I met her.
00:39:21 The best sex you ever had.
00:39:23 Eddie, stop.
00:39:25 I'm just messing with you.
00:39:30 [laughs]
00:39:32 You know, like friends.
00:39:34 Are we really gonna throw away 15 years of friendship?
00:39:38 Where's your tent?
00:39:43 Up that way.
00:39:45 I bet you it's nice.
00:39:48 How big is it?
00:39:51 It's a six.
00:39:53 Hmm.
00:39:56 It's more like an eight.
00:40:00 Eddie.
00:40:04 You're right. It's a test.
00:40:09 Are you out here all alone?
00:40:12 Closest human's a half mile that way.
00:40:14 So no one can hear me if I scream.
00:40:17 No, no, no.
00:40:19 [screams]
00:40:22 We're not kids anymore!
00:40:25 Scream!
00:40:26 You're insane!
00:40:27 Not like we used to be!
00:40:29 [screams]
00:40:30 Again it's gaining on us!
00:40:33 Pretend! Do it! Do it!
00:40:36 Pretend? I don't wanna pretend.
00:40:40 Then don't. Don't.
00:40:43 Fuck you for coming up here.
00:40:53 Fuck me for coming up here.
00:40:55 [grunts]
00:40:57 What?
00:41:18 The silent treatment? Really?
00:41:23 Her father didn't want anyone else driving this truck.
00:41:26 Her father didn't want anyone else. She left the keys for me.
00:41:29 Bitch, you know I didn't.
00:41:31 Give me the keys.
00:41:34 I'm sorry. I ordered this as part of the surprise and I had to pick it up before they closed.
00:41:43 There was no way I could get Jess to go with me without saying anything in front of you.
00:41:52 [footsteps]
00:41:54 Sorry, Jess. It has dairy in it.
00:41:58 You're evil.
00:42:00 I'll take a piece.
00:42:02 Let's save it for later.
00:42:04 Where are they?
00:42:05 Uh, they're somewhere around here.
00:42:07 We should just go.
00:42:09 Come on. They're here. Let's just go for a walk.
00:42:13 Come on, Jess. For Mats.
00:42:16 [eerie music]
00:42:18 [screams]
00:42:29 [screams]
00:42:41 [screams]
00:42:43 You dead yet?
00:42:57 [laughs]
00:42:59 I don't know how you put up with her.
00:43:01 [laughs]
00:43:02 She's such a drama queen.
00:43:04 She's fun.
00:43:05 Come on, Maddie. You have the knife. Come and kill me.
00:43:08 [laughs]
00:43:10 Really? No one?
00:43:11 Someone. Okay, someone else.
00:43:13 I'm good.
00:43:15 What do you want me to do?
00:43:17 Just pretend whoever has the knife is going to kill you.
00:43:20 Okay. Sure. Why not?
00:43:22 Who knows? Maybe Jagger will come and save me.
00:43:26 It starts as soon as you hand the knife to someone.
00:43:29 Which way?
00:43:31 Oh, God.
00:43:33 [laughs]
00:43:34 Ah! Jagger! I'm running!
00:43:37 Oh, no. Here I come.
00:43:39 [screams]
00:43:40 I'm going to kill you, bitch!
00:43:42 [screams]
00:43:43 Oh, my God. She's really into that.
00:43:47 [screams]
00:43:48 Couldn't catch me!
00:43:55 [screams]
00:44:00 [laughs]
00:44:08 You have the weirdest sense of humor.
00:44:11 It's a rush, right? To face your fears?
00:44:14 How the hell is screaming like an idiot facing your fears?
00:44:17 Okay, have you ever been too afraid to get on stage?
00:44:22 Or like, to graduate or make a career change or something?
00:44:25 Everyone knows fight or flight, but really, it's fight, flight, or freeze.
00:44:29 There's life in the first two, but the freeze is stuck on something or someone.
00:44:37 Whatever.
00:44:39 Can I try?
00:44:41 It's fun, right?
00:44:42 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:44:43 [screams]
00:44:44 I'm going to get you!
00:44:46 [screams]
00:44:48 I'm tired of these games. They're not here again.
00:44:52 Jagger will show.
00:44:54 Okay.
00:44:56 All I know is that in an hour, I will be eating that damn cake
00:45:00 and then rage screaming at the ceiling on a real toilet.
00:45:03 Come on, let's just bounce.
00:45:06 He's just testing me. He wants to see what I'm made of.
00:45:10 Maddie.
00:45:11 No. Look, I'm staying.
00:45:14 She's a psychotic manipulator.
00:45:18 You just don't know her as well as I do.
00:45:20 Just give her a chance.
00:45:22 Please? For me?
00:45:33 It's Ed. You got a cabin open?
00:45:36 Hey, Ed. When haven't I had a cabin open? Give me a sec.
00:45:41 Oh, there were two attractive young ladies who were looking for...
00:45:45 Oh, shit. What happened to you?
00:45:49 One of them found me. Don't ask. I have no idea.
00:45:52 You all right? You want some ice cream?
00:45:55 No.
00:45:56 Okay. Now this is a story I need to hear.
00:46:01 Okay.
00:46:02 Hello?
00:46:12 Hello, sir. I just wanted to apologize about earlier.
00:46:18 How would you like to make a couple bucks?
00:46:22 No.
00:46:25 When my friends get back, if you can just, like, rustle around the tent a little and, like, make some stickmen or...
00:46:31 Go back to your camp. Enjoy the night.
00:46:34 Go home, get married, get divorced, live the dream.
00:46:38 Well, maybe there's something else I can do for you?
00:46:46 Go away! Leave me the fuck alone!
00:46:49 Seriously? You won't help me?
00:46:53 Look, I'm sure your friends will be plenty scared with the wind in the house and the fallen fucking pine cones.
00:47:00 Asshole!
00:47:01 Just watch out for the raccoons.
00:47:03 Hope I'm biting your ass.
00:47:05 Just read my fucking book, asshole.
00:47:10 What the fuck?!
00:47:13 Eddie!
00:47:17 [laughing]
00:47:19 Turn it off! Turn it off! Turn it off!
00:47:27 What is wrong with you?
00:47:29 I want you off my land in the morning.
00:47:32 Eddie!
00:47:35 Shh!
00:47:38 Shh!
00:47:40 Don't touch people's stuff.
00:48:06 I like my mask better.
00:48:35 You move pretty good for an old fat Sasquatch.
00:48:39 Eddie?
00:48:40 I got pepper with snake shot.
00:48:42 Snake shot?
00:48:43 Snake shot. I keep the first two rounds of my sidearm for snakes.
00:48:46 It's rat rattlesnakes.
00:48:47 Oh.
00:48:48 Doesn't look too bad, does it?
00:48:49 Oh, my goodness. Uh, you know what?
00:48:53 It's too late for Doc Lock, but I can call the hospital and the rangers or I can drive you to...
00:49:00 I don't explain my stuff to anyone else.
00:49:02 If it bothers me, I'll call Doc Lock in the morning.
00:49:05 Okay. Well, um, here's your box.
00:49:08 Here.
00:49:09 Thanks, Vince.
00:49:11 Uh-huh.
00:49:12 Thanks.
00:49:19 Hey, uh, you have anything that might fit?
00:49:23 Well, um...
00:49:25 Oh, here. Here's a lost and found box.
00:49:28 Whatever's in it, that this year you can have.
00:49:32 That's all you got?
00:49:33 This ain't no department store, baby.
00:49:36 Sure you don't want to go to Doc Lock's?
00:49:40 Nah, I'm good. Thanks, Vince.
00:49:43 Is that Mr. Rogers?
00:49:48 Do you really think he killed his wife?
00:49:53 Never assume a crazy person is harmless.
00:49:56 Hey! Hey!
00:49:58 (screaming)
00:50:01 What the hell's going on?
00:50:05 That was them.
00:50:07 What?
00:50:08 What are you doing back here? I thought you had to...
00:50:19 I shit at the gas station.
00:50:20 Mr. Rogers is at the cabins.
00:50:22 Something's off. Something's really wrong.
00:50:25 We should go there.
00:50:27 Great! Just great, Jess!
00:50:30 You ruined the surprise!
00:50:31 What? She ruined it?
00:50:33 Why did you do that?
00:50:34 Me? What did I do?
00:50:36 I was supposed to keep you all here until tomorrow morning,
00:50:39 and then, then take you to the cabins.
00:50:43 How was I supposed to know that?
00:50:45 He was carrying a big box.
00:50:48 See? I knew it. I have faith like a mustard seed.
00:50:52 You know what? I'm tired. I'm going to bed.
00:50:56 If they're not seen by the morning, I'm gone.
00:51:00 Good night.
00:51:02 Sorry about the surprise.
00:51:06 Maybe you were right. It should have just been you and me.
00:51:11 [♪♪♪]
00:51:14 [ZIPPER UNZIPPING]
00:51:16 [♪♪♪]
00:51:19 [NEIGHING]
00:51:39 [NEIGHING]
00:51:41 Surprised to see you up.
00:51:47 Great.
00:51:48 What you doing?
00:51:50 Couldn't sleep.
00:51:51 Want to go for a drive?
00:51:53 I don't like you.
00:51:55 I don't trust you.
00:51:59 I don't want to close my eyes around you.
00:52:02 I have a special friend who's a cop.
00:52:04 I'm going to have him look into you when we get back.
00:52:07 Something's not right.
00:52:10 Knock yourself out.
00:52:12 Psycho.
00:52:20 [♪♪♪]
00:52:28 [NEIGHING]
00:52:31 [NEIGHING]
00:52:45 I know.
00:52:46 You wanted a good forking this weekend.
00:52:48 [NEIGHING]
00:52:50 We're just going to see if your core is as tight as your butt.
00:52:53 [LAUGHING]
00:52:54 I'm forking nuts.
00:52:56 [NEIGHING]
00:52:58 Stupid.
00:53:00 Relax.
00:53:05 We're just going to go check in on Mr. Rogers
00:53:08 and get some of his guacamole.
00:53:10 I don't care if it's in a cup or if he helps you at gunpoint,
00:53:13 but I'll tell you what,
00:53:15 his DNA inside of you,
00:53:19 that will go a long, long way.
00:53:23 [LAUGHING]
00:53:26 And may I just say,
00:53:39 you are a really good listener when you can't talk.
00:53:42 [LAUGHING]
00:53:50 [KNOCKING]
00:53:53 Hello? Can I help you?
00:53:56 What's with the mask, babe?
00:53:59 [GASPING]
00:54:01 [COUGHING]
00:54:03 [GASPING]
00:54:05 [GASPING]
00:54:07 [GASPING]
00:54:09 [GASPING]
00:54:11 [GASPING]
00:54:13 [GASPING]
00:54:15 [COUGHING]
00:54:17 [GASPING]
00:54:19 [GASPING]
00:54:21 [GASPING]
00:54:23 [GASPING]
00:54:25 [GASPING]
00:54:27 [GASPING]
00:54:29 [GASPING]
00:54:31 [GASPING]
00:54:33 Believe it or not, Mr. Rogers killed you.
00:54:36 [LAUGHING]
00:54:38 Now where could you be?
00:54:41 I'm just going to borrow your keys.
00:54:44 Thanks.
00:54:46 [GASPING]
00:54:48 Wow. Did you win that?
00:54:52 [GASPING]
00:54:54 Karaoke Performer of the Year Special.
00:54:58 Oh, you-- you want this?
00:55:01 [SCREAMING]
00:55:03 [GUNSHOTS]
00:55:05 [GUNSHOT]
00:55:07 [KNOCKING]
00:55:09 [CLAPPING]
00:55:11 What a performance.
00:55:13 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:55:16 [DOOR BELL RINGING]
00:55:18 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:55:21 I was a fool to let you down.
00:55:28 [SCREAMING]
00:55:31 Room service.
00:55:35 Yes?
00:55:37 [SCREAMING]
00:55:39 Say cheese.
00:55:41 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:55:44 [SCREAMING]
00:55:47 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:55:50 Owl service.
00:56:05 [SCREAMING]
00:56:08 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:56:12 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:56:15 Security.
00:56:39 Enjoying the show?
00:56:41 [LAUGHING]
00:56:44 I wonder what they'll do when they find out
00:56:50 Daddy's a serial killer.
00:56:54 Aw.
00:56:56 [LAUGHING]
00:56:57 He wasn't there.
00:57:00 [GROANING]
00:57:03 You do realize this isn't me doing this, right?
00:57:07 It's all what would Mr. Rogers do?
00:57:11 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:57:14 Here you go.
00:57:23 I'm good.
00:57:24 You sure?
00:57:25 Yeah.
00:57:26 Alcohol would probably kill the pain.
00:57:28 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:57:31 The reason why those pellet wounds are burning
00:57:33 is because they're infected.
00:57:35 Yep.
00:57:37 It was going to be tomorrow morning,
00:57:38 but they kept getting worse.
00:57:40 You know, I'm going to have to report it.
00:57:41 I know.
00:57:42 I don't want press charges.
00:57:44 Well, I'm not only a physician, I'm also a reserve ranger.
00:57:48 You know, I have to report all gunshot wounds.
00:57:51 If they lie, the way I learned.
00:57:53 Pretty young thing against a big grumbly asshole
00:57:56 in the middle of nowhere.
00:57:57 [LAUGHING]
00:57:59 Why'd you let them camp there anyway?
00:58:01 I didn't.
00:58:03 I was there when I got back.
00:58:05 First thing they did was take a picture of me
00:58:07 like I was some big frickin' Bigfoot or something,
00:58:10 making fun of me.
00:58:12 I mean, who's a sheriff in the public going to believe?
00:58:15 If I did tell them to get off my lawn, and they posted it,
00:58:18 I'd have 100 protesters there next week
00:58:21 to call me Harry Cairn or something like that.
00:58:25 Well, rest up on the couch.
00:58:27 In the morning, I'll drive you out there.
00:58:29 I'll ask them a few questions, and we'll get to the truth.
00:58:32 This is what I'm talking about.
00:58:34 You believe me?
00:58:35 Poor guy.
00:58:42 I wonder why he became a serial killer.
00:58:45 [CRYING]
00:58:46 Was it because he was born dirt poor?
00:58:48 Or was it because he was told his bipolar mother died
00:58:51 during childbirth, and he cried into his pillow every night
00:58:54 his alcoholic, abusive father raped him?
00:58:57 [CRYING]
00:58:58 [GROANING]
00:59:01 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:59:02 To feel so undervalued, so disposable.
00:59:08 You know, lucky, blessed, pretty people like you
00:59:16 should have more compassion for people like him.
00:59:21 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:59:25 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:59:29 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:59:33 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:59:36 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:59:39 Jess?
01:00:04 Hey.
01:00:05 Guys better not be fucking with me.
01:00:13 Hey.
01:00:14 Jess?
01:00:24 Eddie.
01:00:26 Fuck.
01:00:27 Jess.
01:00:31 Hey.
01:00:32 Jess.
01:00:36 No.
01:00:42 No.
01:00:43 No.
01:00:44 No.
01:00:45 No.
01:00:47 Fuck.
01:00:48 Oh, you slut.
01:01:00 If there are two of you in there,
01:01:01 you better cover up because no one wants to see your scrawny ass.
01:01:04 [SCREAMING]
01:01:17 Rape.
01:01:27 School's out, bitch.
01:01:29 [GUNSHOT]
01:01:30 Aw, you're awake.
01:01:48 Oh, no, no.
01:01:49 Don't worry about Jess.
01:01:51 She's snug as a fuck in a truck just waiting for Mr. Rogers.
01:01:55 But enough about her.
01:01:56 Let's talk about you.
01:01:58 I know, I know.
01:01:59 You need to be studying.
01:02:01 Let's see.
01:02:03 Intertemporal decision making.
01:02:07 Ugh.
01:02:09 That would bore me to death.
01:02:11 I wonder, do you just keep taking classes because you're
01:02:22 afraid to stand on your own?
01:02:24 [SCREAMING]
01:02:27 I guess technically it's afraid to stand on your own two feet.
01:02:33 [SCREAMING]
01:02:34 Screw it.
01:02:36 Sue me.
01:02:37 You know, I honestly don't even know why I'm still bothering with the mask
01:02:40 at this point.
01:02:41 I think I've grown past it.
01:02:43 Aw.
01:02:50 I know.
01:02:52 I found this inside of Mr. Rogers' bear box.
01:03:03 I always wondered if these things were real.
01:03:07 I assume the bears will just probably eat around the fake stuff.
01:03:11 Did you know that bears can smell a drop of honey from a mile away?
01:03:16 Or actually, is that sharks in blood, huh?
01:03:19 Doesn't matter.
01:03:21 [SCREAMING]
01:03:25 Ciao.
01:03:27 [LAUGHTER]
01:03:29 That has an entirely new meaning now, doesn't it?
01:03:32 [LAUGHTER]
01:03:34 [CRYING]
01:03:37 [SCREAMING]
01:03:47 [HUMMING]
01:03:51 [HUMMING]
01:03:55 [FOOTSTEPS]
01:03:58 [BIRDS CHIRPING]
01:04:06 [BIRDS CHIRPING]
01:04:09 [BIRDS CHIRPING]
01:04:12 [BIRDS CHIRPING]
01:04:37 [SIGHS]
01:04:40 Where are Justin and Ray?
01:04:46 They went to the cabins to use the bathrooms.
01:04:48 Hm.
01:04:49 I wish they would have waited for me.
01:04:51 I hate using that bucket.
01:04:52 I guarantee you Jagger uses a bucket just like that one.
01:04:56 What's that?
01:05:01 Matt's and Jag's forever.
01:05:04 Got it from Maddie and me.
01:05:06 Something we could grow into.
01:05:09 Of course, after one excursion, she'll probably run for the hills.
01:05:12 You and I should go camping by ourselves.
01:05:14 Screw Jagger.
01:05:15 I should take her camping.
01:05:17 [LAUGHS]
01:05:19 You're going to tell her.
01:05:24 What?
01:05:25 Absolutely not.
01:05:27 I might end it.
01:05:29 I might never forgive myself, but no one's ever going to know about us.
01:05:34 [THUD]
01:05:36 [THUD]
01:05:39 Surprise!
01:05:41 I got this for you guys as a gift.
01:05:43 Oh!
01:05:44 [LAUGHS]
01:05:45 Thank you, Eddie.
01:05:46 Aw.
01:05:47 It means a lot to me that you support us.
01:05:50 So thank you.
01:05:52 Eddie.
01:05:58 Eddie.
01:06:00 Hey, what are you doing?
01:06:02 You close your eyes when we have sex.
01:06:04 Is that because you're a narcissist or because you despise me?
01:06:07 What are you doing with my phone?
01:06:08 And, Sid.
01:06:11 What?
01:06:12 I told you you were going to tell her.
01:06:15 Pictures and audio of us together.
01:06:16 The truth will set us free.
01:06:18 There's no reception up here for miles.
01:06:19 Give it to me now.
01:06:20 Not until it's safe!
01:06:22 I'm not going to let you ruin my life!
01:06:29 You love me.
01:06:31 You always have.
01:06:32 Did you just--
01:06:34 Kill me!
01:06:37 What?
01:06:39 I'm trying to help you.
01:06:42 I love her, Eddie.
01:06:44 She gets me.
01:06:45 I'm trying to save us from making a huge mistake.
01:06:49 I stood by you through every tragedy.
01:06:53 When people thought you could have been a murderer, I defeated you!
01:06:59 Yes, we're friends, Eddie.
01:07:01 But that's all we're ever going to be.
01:07:03 Maddie will never, never love you like I do!
01:07:07 You're right.
01:07:14 I have to tell her.
01:07:16 No.
01:07:17 I don't know if she'll probably forgive me.
01:07:18 No, baby.
01:07:19 Jack, we don't have to say anything.
01:07:20 If she leaves me, so be it.
01:07:22 I want you out of my life.
01:07:24 Forever.
01:07:26 You're a cancer.
01:07:28 [sobbing]
01:07:38 Forgive me for what I've done.
01:07:40 [screaming]
01:07:42 [gunshot]
01:07:43 [sobbing]
01:07:45 [gunshot]
01:07:46 [sobbing]
01:07:48 What the fuck?
01:07:49 [gunshot]
01:07:50 [gunshot]
01:07:51 [gunshot]
01:07:52 [sobbing]
01:07:53 [gunshot]
01:07:54 [gunshot]
01:07:55 [sobbing]
01:07:56 [screaming]
01:07:57 I just wanted you to finally pick me!
01:08:00 [screaming]
01:08:04 You killed all of them, Brittany.
01:08:08 I'm so sorry, baby.
01:08:12 I didn't mean to.
01:08:14 [screaming]
01:08:17 [theme music]
01:08:25 What have we done to us?
01:08:29 What made the curtains fall?
01:08:33 Now I can only say, the show must go on.
01:08:40 [sobbing]
01:08:48 [theme music]
01:08:58 [theme music]
01:09:08 [theme music]
01:09:14 Now you look like a killer.
01:09:18 I'm sure everything's going to be OK.
01:09:29 I'm just going to get their side.
01:09:31 Doc, that's their truck over there.
01:09:32 Yeah, you just stay right here.
01:09:36 I got this.
01:09:37 Doc, call in.
01:09:38 Get some professionals.
01:09:40 Because of four girls?
01:09:42 I'd never live that down.
01:09:44 Doc, they're not just girls.
01:09:45 Yeah, whatever.
01:09:46 [music playing]
01:09:52 Doc, do you think I shot myself in the back?
01:09:54 I got it.
01:09:57 I heard a car.
01:09:58 It's Jagger.
01:10:00 That'd be fucking creepy.
01:10:04 Oh, darn.
01:10:05 I thought you were someone else.
01:10:07 Is everything OK?
01:10:10 We're fine.
01:10:11 Thank you.
01:10:13 There's four of you up here, right?
01:10:15 Is something wrong, officer?
01:10:18 Reserve Ranger, ma'am.
01:10:20 Where are the other two?
01:10:22 They went to town.
01:10:25 There was an incident up here yesterday involving Ed Rogers.
01:10:29 Oh, did you find him?
01:10:31 We have been so worried about him.
01:10:35 He stumbled and hit his head.
01:10:38 Well, you said somebody shot him in the back.
01:10:41 Yeah, he's in my vehicle safe and sound.
01:10:47 Which one of you is Eddie?
01:10:49 I am.
01:10:50 [screaming]
01:10:53 [screaming]
01:10:56 Surprise.
01:10:58 [laughing]
01:11:00 [screaming]
01:11:07 [laughing]
01:11:09 Why?
01:11:10 Why did you--
01:11:11 Shut up.
01:11:12 I'm so tired of you and your stupid face
01:11:14 and your prissy princess ways.
01:11:17 Don't move.
01:11:34 It feels different when it's real, doesn't it?
01:11:37 What the hell?
01:11:50 [screaming]
01:11:53 What?
01:11:54 [screaming]
01:11:58 [screaming]
01:12:01 [coughing]
01:12:13 I still know where Jagger is.
01:12:19 I still know where Jagger is.
01:12:23 You are so ungrateful.
01:12:26 Why won't you come back here to me?
01:12:29 I'm going to get you.
01:12:32 Ray!
01:12:33 Ray.
01:12:35 Ray!
01:12:36 Ray.
01:12:37 Ray.
01:12:38 Ray!
01:12:40 Ray!
01:12:42 Ray!
01:12:43 Ray!
01:12:44 Ray!
01:12:49 Right here, right here.
01:12:50 What?
01:12:51 [whimpering]
01:12:55 Shh.
01:12:56 We're here.
01:12:57 We're here.
01:12:58 We're here.
01:12:59 Shh.
01:13:00 I know.
01:13:01 I know.
01:13:02 I know.
01:13:03 I know.
01:13:04 Shh.
01:13:05 Shh.
01:13:06 He's helping us, OK?
01:13:07 You're helping us, right?
01:13:08 Yeah.
01:13:09 [whimpering]
01:13:12 Oh my god, it's on her.
01:13:15 [whimpering]
01:13:17 That's my honey.
01:13:19 [whimpering]
01:13:21 This honey might have saved your life.
01:13:23 Kept you from getting infected and made a slow bleeding.
01:13:26 What are we going to do?
01:13:27 I've got to get to my tent.
01:13:29 I've got a first aid kit and a satellite phone.
01:13:31 She didn't find my satellite phone and my other gun, did she?
01:13:34 I don't know.
01:13:35 [whimpering]
01:13:38 Can you walk?
01:13:39 [whimpering]
01:13:40 I can get her to the car.
01:13:41 There's a staircase.
01:13:42 Let's get out.
01:13:43 Come on.
01:13:44 Come on.
01:13:45 Come on.
01:13:46 Come on.
01:13:47 You have any idea where she is?
01:13:48 I don't.
01:13:49 She said she was going to watch Maddie kill herself
01:13:52 and she killed Jagger.
01:13:55 Jagger.
01:13:56 Yeah.
01:13:57 Come on.
01:13:58 Come on.
01:13:59 You two make yourself safe.
01:14:01 I got this.
01:14:02 [whimpering]
01:14:05 [crying]
01:14:11 Maddie, get back here.
01:14:14 Come on, it's fine.
01:14:16 [whimpering]
01:14:21 This was Jagger's favorite game.
01:14:24 That's weird.
01:14:25 He never played it with you.
01:14:27 I guess he only played it with people he was close to.
01:14:32 Isn't camping fun?
01:14:34 [laughing]
01:14:37 Maddie.
01:14:40 Get back here.
01:14:42 I thought we were best friends.
01:14:46 Why are you running away from me?
01:14:50 [laughing]
01:14:53 What a day.
01:14:56 Maddie.
01:14:59 Maddie.
01:15:05 I know you're out there.
01:15:14 Maddie?
01:15:19 Maddie!
01:15:22 [music playing]
01:15:41 I'll get her.
01:16:09 Fuck you.
01:16:19 What the--
01:16:21 You set me up.
01:16:23 Nah, not today, bitch.
01:16:25 [music playing]
01:16:27 (SINGING) Hit me in the face and hit me with that.
01:16:32 Make you wanna go, let you go, I'm nothing to lose.
01:16:38 Guess I'm the best.
01:16:41 See how I'm gonna lose.
01:16:43 One, two, three, four.
01:16:45 Hit my face first, you can tell you haven't been through.
01:16:50 You know, know, I know what you're trying to do.
01:16:56 I want to go.
01:17:00 Fuck yeah, boomer.
01:17:01 Thought I said I got this.
01:17:02 I'm not leaving Maddie.
01:17:04 Here, fix her up.
01:17:05 Get in the back, I'll drive.
01:17:07 Wait.
01:17:08 Where are you going?
01:17:09 Just wait.
01:17:11 Keys are in the car.
01:17:17 What are you doing?
01:17:21 My coat.
01:17:24 [crying]
01:17:29 Please.
01:17:31 [crying]
01:17:34 I'll give you credit.
01:17:36 I had you pegged as a freezer.
01:17:40 Come on.
01:17:42 Come on.
01:17:43 Come on.
01:17:47 [crying]
01:17:50 There's probably gonna be blood and pus.
01:17:52 I don't do well with blood and pus.
01:17:53 Who does well with blood and pus?
01:17:54 Oh my god, I think I'm gonna faint.
01:17:55 What did my therapist say?
01:17:56 What did she say?
01:17:57 What did she say?
01:17:58 [crying]
01:18:01 Oh my god.
01:18:02 I hope you've loved all the surprises.
01:18:05 But this one, this one's the best.
01:18:08 You're gonna love it.
01:18:10 Come on, so fucking slow.
01:18:15 Oh geez, that didn't take long.
01:18:18 You ever heard the expression love stinks?
01:18:21 [screaming]
01:18:24 Here he is.
01:18:26 Aren't reunions special?
01:18:28 [crying]
01:18:32 Don't blame me.
01:18:35 The animals did all this.
01:18:38 I just killed them.
01:18:41 Hi baby.
01:18:42 [crying]
01:18:53 Why?
01:18:54 [screaming]
01:18:58 Where are we?
01:19:00 Why am I holding a gun?
01:19:02 Oh no, did I black out again?
01:19:05 Hattie, Hattie, it's me, Maddie.
01:19:07 Come back, please.
01:19:10 [laughing]
01:19:13 You really are the sunshine from an angel's ass.
01:19:19 [laughing]
01:19:22 We were childhood sweethearts.
01:19:25 And you, you just had to waltz right in and steal that away from me.
01:19:31 You could have never made the sacrifices that I made.
01:19:33 If you loved him, why did you do this to him?
01:19:37 We made love last weekend.
01:19:40 Right here, actually.
01:19:43 And right after.
01:19:45 Stupid.
01:19:49 And I couldn't live with that.
01:19:51 And neither could he.
01:19:54 And neither can you.
01:19:57 Oh, I know.
01:19:58 You must be so distraught.
01:20:01 This is Jagger's.
01:20:03 I thought you'd want it to be his knife that brings you back together.
01:20:09 Go ahead and make it quick.
01:20:10 I still have to go out and fight and kill Mr. Rogers.
01:20:15 What?
01:20:17 Isn't this what you wanted?
01:20:19 I'm giving you the chance to join him for eternity.
01:20:23 Rot in hell.
01:20:26 That's not very nice.
01:20:29 [laughing]
01:20:31 Eddie, you were my roommate.
01:20:33 You were my best friend.
01:20:35 We have never been friends.
01:20:37 How can you say that?
01:20:39 I treated you like a sister.
01:20:42 You treated me no different than any of them.
01:20:44 Now do it, now!
01:20:47 Now!
01:20:51 Three.
01:20:53 Two.
01:20:56 One.
01:20:57 I'm pregnant!
01:21:00 What?
01:21:02 I'm pregnant.
01:21:04 Please.
01:21:06 Please.
01:21:11 [gunshot]
01:21:12 [screaming]
01:21:14 Jagger Rangers are on their way.
01:21:16 If you don't drop that gun, the next round's gonna eat you center mass.
01:21:25 Is that you, Mr. Rogers?
01:21:27 Hell yeah, it is.
01:21:29 All I gotta do is keep eyes on you until they get here.
01:21:32 Help me, Jagger.
01:21:33 Help me.
01:21:35 It's just you against me.
01:21:38 [screaming]
01:21:40 You backstabber!
01:21:43 Don't!
01:21:45 If you're gonna kill my partner dead,
01:21:47 then it should be your word against mine.
01:21:49 Do you have any idea how many people you've killed?
01:21:52 Probably less than you think.
01:21:55 Hey, bitch!
01:21:57 [music playing]
01:21:59 [growling]
01:22:01 [inaudible]
01:22:04 What the fuck?
01:22:06 [gunshot]
01:22:07 [grunting]
01:22:10 I lied.
01:22:12 I'm not pregnant.
01:22:13 [screaming]
01:22:16 Drop it now, bitch!
01:22:18 [music playing]
01:22:22 [laughing]
01:22:24 [screaming]
01:22:27 [gunshot]
01:22:28 [screaming]
01:22:29 What the fuck?
01:22:30 [panting]
01:22:36 Get the fuck over there!
01:22:40 You're not gonna miss from this distance.
01:22:43 You're the worst!
01:22:45 [screaming]
01:22:46 You're not dying!
01:22:48 I hate you!
01:22:50 You're the worst!
01:22:51 [screaming]
01:22:56 Jagger!
01:22:57 [inaudible]
01:22:58 Raccoons.
01:23:00 Raccoons.
01:23:01 Raccoons.
01:23:02 [panting]
01:23:05 [grunting]
01:23:12 Bye, bitch.
01:23:14 [kiss]
01:23:15 [music playing]
01:23:18 Fuck.
01:23:19 [panting]
01:23:23 I still got nine.
01:23:24 I still got--
01:23:25 I--
01:23:26 [music playing]
01:23:29 [panting]
01:23:31 [grunting]
01:23:38 Raccoons.
01:23:39 Raccoons.
01:23:40 [panting]
01:23:43 Raccoons.
01:23:44 Truce?
01:23:45 Raccoons!
01:23:47 [screaming]
01:23:49 [music playing]
01:23:56 Oh my god.
01:23:57 [crying]
01:24:00 [crying]
01:24:02 Oh my god.
01:24:04 You did a good job.
01:24:06 [crying]
01:24:10 I heard.
01:24:13 Don't worry about me.
01:24:16 [grunting]
01:24:17 [music playing]
01:24:22 [panting]
01:24:26 [music playing]
01:24:31 I hate camping.
01:24:33 [panting]
01:24:36 [laughing]
01:24:44 [screaming]
01:24:45 [explosion]
01:24:46 [music playing]
01:24:51 [theme music]
01:24:56 [singing in foreign language]
01:25:22 Or am I a bullet?
01:25:23 [gunshot]
01:25:24 [music playing]
01:25:38 [gun cocks]
01:25:39 [theme music]
01:25:58 Guess you never thought I'd fight for it.
01:26:00 Told you.
01:26:01 Yeah.
01:26:02 You'd think I'd learn.
01:26:05 Listen to my lawyers.
01:26:07 Extinction is too good for you.
01:26:10 Hey, look, I got to go.
01:26:12 My daughters are coming over.
01:26:13 Is this your first wife practically?
01:26:15 I should have burned that dinosaur down.
01:26:17 What's up, Tiny?
01:26:19 You're going to be fine.
01:26:20 You'll be fine.
01:26:21 They both drive now.
01:26:22 They're in their 20s.
01:26:23 Anyway, I got a business idea I'm mulling over.
01:26:26 Yeah, I'm all ears.
01:26:27 No, I'll tell you tomorrow.
01:26:29 Theme park?
01:26:30 Maybe.
01:26:31 I'll give you a teaser.
01:26:33 People love being scared.
01:26:36 [laughs]
01:26:41 Ah, life is good.
01:26:45 [theme music]
01:26:50 [theme music]
01:27:00 [theme music]
01:27:10 [theme music]
01:27:20 [theme music]
01:27:30 [theme music]
01:27:40 [theme music]
01:27:50 [theme music]
01:28:00 [theme music]
01:28:03 [BLANK_AUDIO]