Buddy Goes West 1981
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00 [Music]
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00:02:58 Mescaleros.
00:03:00 They got us pinned down, sir. I'll sound the attack.
00:03:07 No, wait. It looks like their chief.
00:03:10 How can you tell?
00:03:12 Oh, that feather. And he's wearing a pair of antlers.
00:03:16 My God, he's pretty enormous.
00:03:23 These Indians look a lot more like a herd of buffalo to me, sir.
00:03:37 [Speaking in Native language]
00:03:42 Huh? What'd he say?
00:03:44 Their way of saying hello, sir.
00:03:46 Oh, how'd you do?
00:03:48 [Speaking in Native language]
00:03:55 Loosely translated, he's saying he wants the prisoner.
00:03:58 No dice.
00:04:00 [Speaking in Native language]
00:04:04 Either he gets his prisoner or he's gonna tell his braves to get their asses down here and scalp every one of us, sir.
00:04:09 Dice.
00:04:11 I don't think it's the case to go on the warpath for a two-bit horse thief.
00:04:17 Free him.
00:04:19 Right, sir.
00:04:20 [Speaking in Native language]
00:04:23 Says he wants a horse too, sir.
00:04:25 Mm-hmm. Cloppity-clop.
00:04:28 Free the prisoner.
00:04:31 [Clears throat]
00:04:33 Get down.
00:04:42 Move it, Injun.
00:04:46 Blast him.
00:04:53 Go on, beat it, Scott.
00:04:57 [Horses galloping]
00:05:07 [Speaking in Native language]
00:05:22 [Horses whinnying]
00:05:29 Something funny about them.
00:05:33 They're Indians.
00:05:35 What is it, Major? What do you see?
00:05:46 They're painted.
00:05:48 You mean their horses are paint?
00:05:50 No. They're dummies on a stick.
00:05:54 [Gunshot]
00:05:56 [Horses whinnying]
00:05:58 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:03 Ah, shut up.
00:06:05 [Horses whinnying]
00:06:10 [Gunshot]
00:06:12 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:26 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:29 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:32 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:35 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:38 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:41 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:44 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:47 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:50 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:53 [Speaking in Native language]
00:06:55 What do you manner to in the evil spirits alone?
00:06:58 [Speaking in Native language]
00:07:00 I ain't got much sympathy for chasing after you to save you from the rope.
00:07:06 Now, everybody in the United States cavalry is on our trail.
00:07:10 I wouldn't put you in front of a cigar store.
00:07:13 Just looking at your fool head, I swear I lose my appetite.
00:07:17 That ain't fair.
00:07:19 [Speaking in Native language]
00:07:21 No, I ain't your blood brother you knit with.
00:07:24 Between us, there's only a transfusion from this arm to that arm.
00:07:27 Because you needed blood after one of your tribesmen shot you with an arrow.
00:07:31 I should have let you die.
00:07:33 Now, I'm going west and you're going to your reservation.
00:07:36 So take off and don't look back.
00:07:38 Savvy?
00:07:40 [Speaking in Native language]
00:07:43 [Speaking in Native language]
00:07:46 [Speaking in Native language]
00:07:49 [Speaking in Native language]
00:07:52 Cut it out, Coco. Quit following me.
00:07:55 [Speaking in Native language]
00:07:59 They'd recognize us in two seconds, you with that dumb feather and me with my derby hat.
00:08:04 [Speaking in Native language]
00:08:09 No, you ain't related.
00:08:12 There are no blood ties between us.
00:08:14 You're confused because of the transfusion.
00:08:17 [Speaking in Native language]
00:08:19 There should be a train coming around now.
00:08:22 [Speaking in Native language]
00:08:27 [♪♪♪]
00:08:37 [Speaking in Native language]
00:08:39 [♪♪♪]
00:08:51 [Speaking in Native language]
00:08:53 [♪♪♪]
00:08:56 [Speaking in Native language]
00:08:58 [♪♪♪]
00:09:08 Coco.
00:09:10 [♪♪♪]
00:09:15 Whoo!
00:09:17 [♪♪♪]
00:09:19 [Speaking in Native language]
00:09:21 [♪♪♪]
00:09:29 [♪♪♪]
00:09:39 [♪♪♪]
00:09:45 [♪♪♪]
00:09:51 Get going, Coco.
00:09:53 [♪♪♪]
00:09:59 Whoa!
00:10:00 Boyd!
00:10:02 Have a nice trip, sir.
00:10:04 Thank you, Jason.
00:10:06 Good for you, sir. Right on time.
00:10:08 -Hasn't missed a train yet, have I? -No, sir. I'll take that.
00:10:11 No, no. I never let it out of my head.
00:10:13 -It's a fortune. -It doesn't look like it weighs very much.
00:10:17 Oh, but it's worth its weight in gold.
00:10:19 Watch your step.
00:10:21 Thank you.
00:10:23 [♪♪♪]
00:10:29 [train rumbling]
00:10:33 [♪♪♪]
00:10:41 [train rumbling]
00:10:51 [train rumbling]
00:10:55 -Oh. -Voilà .
00:10:57 -Thank you. -Bon appétit, madame.
00:11:00 -I would like to order, maitre. -Tout de suite, monsieur.
00:11:03 -Bonjour, monsieur. -Au revoir.
00:11:06 -Shall we start with order? -I'd like that.
00:11:10 [laughing]
00:11:12 [indistinct chatter]
00:11:14 [indistinct chatter]
00:11:20 Bon appétit, monsieur.
00:11:22 [train rumbling]
00:11:24 [indistinct chatter]
00:11:31 [indistinct chatter]
00:11:37 Oh, mon Dieu.
00:11:40 There is a table for you there, at the end.
00:11:44 Cover up your glass. Put your hand over it.
00:11:48 It's covered with dust.
00:11:50 [indistinct chatter]
00:11:54 Uh, your salute.
00:11:56 [glass shattering]
00:11:59 Monsieur.
00:12:04 Oh, monsieur.
00:12:07 [indistinct chatter]
00:12:09 Ah, your hat. Le chapeau.
00:12:13 [chuckling]
00:12:15 I'll...
00:12:17 I'm so sorry. Pardonnez-moi, monsieur.
00:12:21 Garçon, prenez la commande.
00:12:23 Tout de suite.
00:12:25 [glass shattering]
00:12:28 -Everything all right, Agnes? -I'm not too sure, Everett.
00:12:31 He's in here. As soon as they bring our finger bowl,
00:12:34 we'll get the check and be out of here.
00:12:36 Yes. These Western lines are infested with outlaws and scoundrels of every ilk.
00:12:41 I wouldn't be a bit surprised to find one on this train.
00:12:44 Right. We're not used to traveling with savages.
00:12:49 [groaning]
00:12:51 Madame.
00:12:58 Uh, here.
00:13:00 Your finger bowl, monsieur.
00:13:02 [slurping]
00:13:04 Mm.
00:13:13 [slurping]
00:13:21 [gulping]
00:13:27 [train whistle blowing]
00:13:30 [train rumbling]
00:13:34 [chattering]
00:13:37 [chattering]
00:13:40 [chattering]
00:14:08 [train whistle blowing]
00:14:11 [chattering]
00:14:13 [laughing]
00:14:26 [screaming]
00:14:30 [screaming]
00:14:36 [glass shattering]
00:14:38 [screaming]
00:14:41 [chattering]
00:14:46 [speaking foreign language]
00:14:50 Oh, what's going on? Sir, can you converse with a savage?
00:14:58 -Oh, God have mercy! -Kalaka!
00:15:01 [speaking foreign language]
00:15:03 -Kalaka! -Kalaka!
00:15:05 [speaking foreign language]
00:15:07 -Kalake! -Kalake, sorry.
00:15:11 -You speak their language? -Their language is very schematic.
00:15:14 Without prepositions or coordinate conjunctions.
00:15:17 But I'll do what I can, however.
00:15:19 [speaking foreign language]
00:15:21 He's after a treasure, it would seem.
00:15:28 Or perhaps, um, treasure.
00:15:30 -Gold. -What gold?
00:15:33 [chiming]
00:15:35 [speaking foreign language]
00:15:41 No, no, no, you can't walk off with this.
00:15:44 -I beg you, do you intend-- -No value.
00:15:46 [speaking foreign language]
00:15:48 He wants a hostage.
00:15:53 Do we have a volunteer among us? Hmm?
00:15:56 I didn't think so.
00:15:58 Suppose I have to go then.
00:16:00 [speaking foreign language]
00:16:02 [speaking foreign language]
00:16:05 I'm afraid he chose you, sir.
00:16:09 Thank God for that, dear friend.
00:16:11 [speaking foreign language]
00:16:13 [speaking foreign language]
00:16:19 He'll surely murder us all, sir.
00:16:22 If I could, I'd be willing to volunteer.
00:16:24 But I have children.
00:16:26 Yeah, yeah.
00:16:28 He wants you.
00:16:30 All right, madam, I'll be the hostage.
00:16:32 Oh, God bless you.
00:16:34 My kind sir, I'll never forget you.
00:16:37 Your face shall be sculpted in my memory forevermore.
00:16:40 Well, I better get going then.
00:16:42 Tell him you're gonna cut my throat.
00:16:45 [speaking foreign language]
00:16:51 [speaking foreign language]
00:16:56 That door's closed.
00:16:58 [speaking foreign language]
00:17:00 I knew it. That's the end of my dining cart.
00:17:12 Whenever I start eating, you show up.
00:17:14 [speaking foreign language]
00:17:16 Ah, shut up. There ain't no jingle in there.
00:17:20 Clear the dummies out.
00:17:22 [speaking foreign language]
00:17:23 The ones you put up there.
00:17:26 [speaking foreign language]
00:17:28 [speaking foreign language]
00:17:31 [speaking foreign language]
00:17:34 [speaking foreign language]
00:17:36 Stop it and get down.
00:17:58 [speaking foreign language]
00:18:02 Ah, shut up.
00:18:04 [music]
00:18:32 I break your Indian neck.
00:18:34 I nearly doubled my spine.
00:18:36 Two Palomino horses lost.
00:18:38 $200, your jinx.
00:18:40 [speaking foreign language]
00:18:42 You can say that again. Let's go, Wichita.
00:18:45 [speaking foreign language]
00:18:47 Yeah, and Kalamazoo.
00:18:49 [speaking foreign language]
00:18:50 Ah, shut up.
00:18:51 [speaking foreign language]
00:18:53 [speaking foreign language]
00:19:00 What'd you say?
00:19:01 [speaking foreign language]
00:19:03 Shut up.
00:19:11 [speaking foreign language]
00:19:17 [speaking foreign language]
00:19:19 Huh, Myers?
00:19:46 [snoring]
00:19:48 Myers?
00:19:52 [snoring]
00:19:59 Stop.
00:20:04 [speaking foreign language]
00:20:06 [music]
00:20:09 [gunshots]
00:20:11 [speaking foreign language]
00:20:17 Oh, I had the strangest nightmare.
00:20:27 Who's there? Who's in that barn?
00:20:30 Our Father, who art in heaven, pray for us all.
00:20:33 I'll be thy name. Let me explain.
00:20:35 Now there's nothing to explain.
00:20:37 You're trespassing.
00:20:39 You can go right back and tell Colorado Slim
00:20:42 that Sean Logan won't be frightened.
00:20:45 Clear?
00:20:46 Loud.
00:20:47 Clear, clear. Give a body a chance to answer.
00:20:49 Mm-hmm.
00:20:51 There's something there that makes the eye.
00:20:54 Well, take a look. You keep them at bay.
00:20:56 Mm-hmm.
00:20:57 And pray for their souls before you shoot.
00:20:59 Mm-hmm.
00:21:00 Steady now.
00:21:01 Mm-hmm.
00:21:04 [snoring]
00:21:06 Well, come and dance with me in Ireland.
00:21:13 Looky here.
00:21:16 Doctors' tools, Stella.
00:21:19 Surgical irons.
00:21:21 Are you sure of that, Popsy?
00:21:22 I am.
00:21:23 What's the meaning of it?
00:21:25 That he's a doctor of medicine.
00:21:27 Oh, you're a real treasure.
00:21:29 We've never had a doctor before.
00:21:32 Just the hands of Providence that sent you
00:21:35 to save me dying farther from the claws of death.
00:21:38 To save your father.
00:21:40 Aye, the old man is in your hands, Doc.
00:21:44 You said Doc--
00:21:45 A doctor of surgery, aye.
00:21:47 Well, where can I visit you, patient?
00:21:51 [whimpering]
00:21:53 [hiccup]
00:21:56 [whimpering]
00:21:58 [speaking in foreign language]
00:22:01 When did he first feel sick?
00:22:03 Well, right after dinner, Doctor.
00:22:06 Nice way to go, huh?
00:22:08 Hmm, what was on the menu?
00:22:10 Oh, nothing.
00:22:11 Since me father is no young fella any longer,
00:22:13 he keeps his innards from being overloaded.
00:22:16 He ate some griddled corn, pomini grits,
00:22:19 a smoked herring, a half a dozen eggs,
00:22:21 and some salt pork, and a stewed pear, Doc.
00:22:25 Stewed pears can be very indigestible.
00:22:28 Well, I ate the pears too, and I ain't got no collywobbles.
00:22:31 Yeah.
00:22:32 Very well.
00:22:33 I'll be needing a whole pot of beans
00:22:35 with ginger juice and molasses,
00:22:37 with sausages on the side.
00:22:38 Oh, what a pity.
00:22:39 The latter in the cupboard are bad.
00:22:41 Wouldn't you know.
00:22:43 Would you kindly leave the premises
00:22:45 while my nurse and myself examine the afflicted patient?
00:22:48 Yes, and the ladies too, and--
00:22:50 Let's go.
00:22:51 Certainly, Doctor.
00:22:52 All we can do now is pray for a miracle to happen.
00:22:56 (speaking in foreign language)
00:22:59 (laughing)
00:23:01 (speaking in foreign language)
00:23:05 (upbeat music)
00:23:25 (speaking in foreign language)
00:23:28 Just like horses get.
00:23:30 Keep the patient's head up high.
00:23:36 Same as horses.
00:23:38 Saline solution to bring on.
00:23:45 He's got to toss his cookies.
00:23:47 (upbeat music)
00:23:50 (speaking in foreign language)
00:23:57 Add purgative discharging essence to solution.
00:24:14 Purgative charge.
00:24:17 (upbeat music)
00:24:20 (speaking in foreign language)
00:24:30 Discharge powder.
00:24:32 (speaking in foreign language)
00:24:40 Put in some castor oil in the solution.
00:24:45 (speaking in foreign language)
00:24:52 It's whale oil.
00:24:56 It lubrifies.
00:24:58 Forgot the salt.
00:25:00 (speaking in foreign language)
00:25:10 (laughing)
00:25:12 (chewing)
00:25:18 (screaming)
00:25:35 (laughing)
00:25:39 (speaking in foreign language)
00:25:42 No, no.
00:25:43 (speaking in foreign language)
00:25:44 No, no, but I--
00:25:45 (screaming)
00:25:48 (laughing)
00:25:50 (speaking in foreign language)
00:25:51 We heartily thank thee, oh power divine,
00:25:53 for cleansing this fetid creature of thine.
00:25:56 Amen.
00:25:57 (zapping)
00:26:05 (laughing)
00:26:08 (speaking in foreign language)
00:26:12 (laughing)
00:26:13 (speaking in foreign language)
00:26:16 (laughing)
00:26:19 (speaking in foreign language)
00:26:22 (laughing)
00:26:25 (speaking in foreign language)
00:26:28 (laughing)
00:26:31 (speaking in foreign language)
00:26:34 (laughing)
00:26:37 (speaking in foreign language)
00:26:41 (laughing)
00:26:44 (speaking in foreign language)
00:26:48 (laughing)
00:26:51 (speaking in foreign language)
00:26:55 (laughing)
00:26:58 (speaking in foreign language)
00:27:02 (laughing)
00:27:05 (speaking in foreign language)
00:27:09 (laughing)
00:27:12 (speaking in foreign language)
00:27:16 (laughing)
00:27:19 (speaking in foreign language)
00:27:23 (laughing)
00:27:26 (speaking in foreign language)
00:27:30 (laughing)
00:27:33 (speaking in foreign language)
00:27:37 (laughing)
00:27:40 (speaking in foreign language)
00:27:44 (laughing)
00:27:47 (speaking in foreign language)
00:27:51 (laughing)
00:27:54 (speaking in foreign language)
00:27:58 (guns firing)
00:28:01 (explosions booming)
00:28:04 (yelling)
00:28:22 (explosions booming)
00:28:25 (horse snorting)
00:28:28 - Get out.
00:28:31 I don't know who you are nor your reasons for coming here,
00:28:44 but I'm warning you critters,
00:28:47 don't ever mess with me when I'm eating.
00:28:53 (grunting)
00:28:56 (speaking in foreign language)
00:29:03 Take out two horses, just two.
00:29:08 (dramatic music)
00:29:11 (horse snorting)
00:29:14 (dramatic music)
00:29:17 (dramatic music)
00:29:21 (dramatic music)
00:29:24 ♪ (sorrowful music)
00:29:30 (horse whinnying) ♪ (sorrowful music)
00:29:32 ♪ (sorrowful music)
00:29:41 ♪ (sorrowful music)
00:29:56 ♪ (sorrowful music)
00:30:14 - Move!
00:30:16 Back to the city!
00:30:18 You are a thug!
00:30:20 (horse whinnying)
00:30:23 - Danny!
00:30:23 (door slams)
00:30:24 - Colorado Slim...him again.
00:30:27 Brave as idiots, turning this prairie into worthless land.
00:30:30 - Only this time he found some of his own medicine, huh?
00:30:33 - Nah...
00:30:35 Don't fool yourself.
00:30:37 Your friend here only saw part of the gang.
00:30:40 Colorado has lots of pull around these parts,
00:30:42 and lots of men.
00:30:43 - Well that's a fact.
00:30:44 The sheriff Braintree here has clamped down
00:30:47 on about 20 of those dirty bandits,
00:30:49 yet somehow their number keeps going up,
00:30:52 instead of going down.
00:30:53 - Yeah...it's no picnic trying to protect this town.
00:30:57 Just look around you.
00:30:59 Yucca was a live little town.
00:31:03 Now it's turned into a desert.
00:31:06 Take a look there.
00:31:08 Almost every day there's someone packing out,
00:31:10 closing shop on account of Colorado and his men.
00:31:13 They don't feel safe around here anymore.
00:31:17 Even the judges run away,
00:31:19 and there ain't a doctor for miles around.
00:31:21 There's one sitting right in front of your fine mustache, sheriff.
00:31:25 - This critter here?
00:31:27 - Order, sheriff, come to order.
00:31:30 The man's a bona fide doctor of medicinals.
00:31:32 He healed me father, turned him into a stripling youth he did.
00:31:35 (laughing)
00:31:38 - Except for his bag.
00:31:42 He sure don't look like a doctor to me, friend.
00:31:46 - Hmm...except for the bag,
00:31:49 I and my ass-taker sister lost all our luggage
00:31:52 in a train hold.
00:31:53 - A honeco?
00:31:53 - Yeah, and we don't have a plug nickel left to our name.
00:31:56 - Well don't give it a thought.
00:31:57 We're your debtors.
00:31:58 Aren't you a doctor?
00:32:00 Well then the whole town is yours, lock, stock and barrel.
00:32:03 - And barrel?
00:32:04 - And barrel, cider, pork barrel, pickle and herring barrel.
00:32:08 - Well in that case...
00:32:09 - In that case, welcome to our town, Doc.
00:32:11 (screaming)
00:32:16 (train rumbling)
00:32:21 (screaming)
00:32:23 (train whistle blowing)
00:32:28 (gunshots)
00:32:33 - Here they go, Hicks!
00:32:35 (gunshots)
00:32:40 - Get in the shed!
00:32:42 (gunshots)
00:32:47 (gunshots)
00:32:52 (gunshots)
00:32:57 (gunshots)
00:33:00 - Come on, get on! Get on the horse!
00:33:03 (gunshots)
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00:41:38 (gunshot)
00:41:43 - Let's split it. That's fair, isn't it?
00:41:48 (chatter)
00:41:53 (chatter)
00:41:58 (chatter)
00:42:03 (chatter)
00:42:08 (chatter)
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00:56:03 Fly away, Doc.
00:56:08 (chatter)
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00:56:43 Don't provoke, Sheriff.
00:56:47 Another false move and I'll put a hole through your star. Now take off your belt.
00:56:52 Drop it.
00:56:56 Put it down.
00:56:59 You're such a good guy.
00:57:02 I'm looking for the bad guy.
00:57:05 I'm looking for the bad guy.
00:57:10 Not getting through to you.
00:57:13 Don't shoot or I'll get mad.
00:57:16 (gunshot)
00:57:17 (grunt)
00:57:20 (gunshots)
00:57:24 Where'd he go? He faked out cold.
00:57:26 Go find that old cricketer, you idiot.
00:57:28 (chatter)
00:57:32 You see him?
00:57:33 Everybody out.
00:57:35 Get out.
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00:59:27 Come on, I'll snap you.
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