Road testing some alternative Christmas Night entertainment with retro board games.
Volunteers Calum, Maz and Emma take a trip back in time at David Lloyd Sunderland.
Volunteers Calum, Maz and Emma take a trip back in time at David Lloyd Sunderland.
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00:00 So, it's Christmas night. You're tipsy, stuffed, maybe a little bit bored, there's nowhere to go out to.
00:06 It's the perfect chance to indulge in a little trip back in time.
00:10 So for some alternative entertainment for Christmas evening, we've got a group of people trying out some retro board games
00:16 which are fairly easy to find. You can find them either in the loft or probably on eBay.
00:21 Can't speak for how many parts might be missing, but the only real criteria for me for a retro board game is
00:26 you have to be able to imagine yourself playing it with a glass of baby sham in hand and the two Ronnies on in the background.
00:31 Now, Callum had perhaps started on the snowballs when we asked him to introduce the first game of the night.
00:36 Connect four.
00:38 For f*** sake.
00:42 Let's take some of these as well.
00:45 But our competitors were soon able to recall the rules of the game, more or less.
00:51 It's been a while since I've played it, so it's kind of trying to think does it have to be diagonal or not, which is odd.
00:57 I don't know why I always thought it had to be a diagonal one.
00:59 No, I'm not doing that. No, that's not fair.
01:05 Got it.
01:12 I think I got it.
01:13 You could have won there.
01:14 That was me, I'd done it first.
01:15 This is a bit hard to read.
01:17 Got it? Yep.
01:19 Fresh from a triumph over Callum, Maz took on Emma.
01:21 Oh, this is too tense. Let's just skip to Maz winning again.
01:34 Got it.
01:37 Oh, well done.
01:38 She's the champ.
01:39 She's the champ. Connect four.
01:41 And in the heady thrill of victory, Maz's thoughts turned to a more complex two-player game.
01:46 Albeit at at least 500 years old, perhaps one that's a little too retro for our purposes tonight.
01:53 I could have brought chess as well, I've got it at home.
01:55 I've never played chess.
01:56 Oh, I've never played. It's that complicated, isn't it?
01:58 Is it? Oh, the film I did a couple of months back, it was shooting outside an Airbnb and that, and they had like an old glass chessboard thing.
02:08 And I was like, I'd be able to play it, but I've never played it before.
02:11 I've never played chess before in my life, so I wouldn't know where to move things properly.
02:14 I'm going to do drafts in chess.
02:16 This is like what you play when you don't even want to play drafts.
02:20 Yeah, this is the basic of the basic.
02:23 You could probably have a few games and then go to something else and then maybe come back to it.
02:27 I think it's like less complicated because it doesn't have the instructions. It's very straight, a very straight forward, easier mind a little bit.
02:35 So there's the comfort in the players, isn't it? Because you know exactly how to do it once you've set it up, that's it.
02:40 Yeah, yeah. And it would be good for like kids and adults to play, wouldn't it?
02:44 Yeah, I think so.
02:46 Ta-da!
02:52 Oh, that was like, oh man!
02:56 Well played.
02:57 Well played.
02:58 I like connected boards, proper blast from the 80s.
03:02 Yeah, I love that. And I also used to love Guess Who?
03:06 Oh, Guess Who was great.
03:08 I used to always love Guess Who.
03:09 The pictures on them are quite different now because my nephew got one last year and I was like, this is the people of Guess Who.
03:15 Oh, even like Operation was one of my favourite.
03:18 Oh yeah, that was so funny.
03:19 It was stressful.
03:20 I know, like you hear the beep and you're like, "Nah, man."
03:22 I just love looking through the Argos catalogue of all the games.
03:26 All the games, yes, yes.
03:27 It's on your list.
03:28 It wasn't long before our trek down memory lane had our competitors recalling a 90s favourite.
03:33 Furbies as well.
03:35 Those were horrifying. I never had one of them.
03:37 They were just like...
03:38 They're back out this year though.
03:39 Yeah, they were just like...
03:40 It was like walking into Gremlins.
03:42 Like a little butterfly in that, that's what I think.
03:44 It's like, if you don't feel, turn into a gremlin.
03:46 There was a very real chance that was going to happen if you left it in your wardrobe and let the batteries dwindle,
03:52 because then all of a sudden, like six months later, you'll forget about it and you'll just hear a noise coming from the battery in your wardrobe.
03:58 Little did our trio know that the next game of the evening was not one they're likely to be recalling fondly in years to come.
04:05 Oh, we'll have to build it first.
04:07 Yeah.
04:08 It's somehow all on there, how it's meant to be put together. You can follow it.
04:12 How are you supposed to do this?
04:16 Right, the staircase is a top bit.
04:20 Well, I'm going to assume that this goes into here somehow.
04:23 Is this part?
04:26 That looks about right.
04:27 I don't know if that's meant to come out of there.
04:30 It could be.
04:33 Oh yeah, that's meant to just hang it there.
04:35 I'm seeing two different types of stairs.
04:39 So I'm assuming that this must go into here somehow.
04:43 Which looks about right.
04:46 I think this cardboard's meant to slot in between that little gap you've got put together there.
04:50 Yeah.
04:52 It says it looks like it from the photo there.
04:54 It says you start with the stairs, which looks like this.
04:57 But then there's two sides.
05:00 The really terrifying thing about Ghost Castle was trying to assemble it.
05:04 It was a bit like getting something home from a miniature gothic Ikea.
05:07 I think we can just go and connect forward this way.
05:09 All I know is that this goes, this thing goes in the middle.
05:12 That goes higher up, does it?
05:13 I'm just looking at the photo there, following this port here with the doors.
05:18 Oh no, that goes there.
05:20 Is that attached further up, so that goes under there?
05:23 I think so.
05:24 Does that actually go on the outside of this, actually?
05:28 Have I figured this bit out?
05:30 That looks like it should slot under there.
05:32 Yeah.
05:33 Oh, that makes sense. Right, okay.
05:35 We've got one bit. One bit.
05:36 My chance.
05:38 What I say is that the start with the ghost on the sides, it's in the centre here.
05:42 Yeah, because I can see the image of the knight and the...
05:48 It's determined it's not going to go in.
05:52 Have we got a little axe somewhere?
05:54 No.
05:55 That's a skull.
06:01 Oh, that goes in there.
06:02 Does it?
06:04 Looks like, yeah.
06:05 Yes, there's a little hole there.
06:07 Maybe we're supposed to drop it in. Maybe that's the point of the game.
06:16 Game, yeah.
06:17 So, I'm assuming that's what that does.
06:19 It has to be said, you could see the festive spirit starting to sap away.
06:23 I should have left both for last.
06:25 We peeked too soon.
06:28 Now, you may notice that we are in a different location.
06:31 That's because loud music has started next door,
06:33 which is something that can happen on Christmas Day as well.
06:36 We had asked our players for their genuine reactions to these games,
06:39 and their reaction to this one was very authentic to hell with it.
06:43 Yeah, I'm going to impress with this one.
06:45 Yeah, no, I'm not.
06:46 It's like a family game on Christmas.
06:48 You don't want to have to...
06:49 Just make something simple.
06:50 Yeah.
06:51 I think what a waste of money they've wasted on getting their kids this
06:54 when they saw it at the time.
06:55 "I want to book a Christmas mob, do you get me?"
06:57 Yeah.
06:58 Can you imagine the advert being like, "Make them look amazing."
07:02 You can tell by the looks on their faces,
07:04 the most fun part of Ghost Castle was putting it back in the box.
07:08 Yeah, it's definitely not one I would go back to.
07:11 Next game we're going to play is Downfall.
07:14 I'm already halfway there.
07:15 Let's read this before we go.
07:17 At least you can't lose the instructions in the box
07:20 in old-fashioned way.
07:21 Exactly, yeah.
07:22 But I think that on there, the turners are all in place.
07:24 That's a good start.
07:25 I've been on YouTube looking at a tutorial how to play this.
07:29 Hey, guys, welcome to my game tutorial.
07:31 Our players are on surer ground here.
07:33 Downfall feels very much like next level Connect 4.
07:36 Yay!
07:37 Yes!
07:38 Oh!
07:39 You've lost because you haven't put your two down before you three.
07:42 Ah!
07:43 You three went down first.
07:45 Does that mean I win?
07:47 You do.
07:48 Yeah, because I didn't do mine in order.
07:49 You did mine in order.
07:50 Callum wins on a technicality, but he's having it.
07:53 That one was actually, the more you play, the more you learn about it.
07:57 And then, yeah, you could--
07:59 That's better than the ghost castle.
08:01 Definitely better than the ghost castle.
08:05 We'll give that one a--
08:07 Yeah.
08:08 Next game we're going to play is the family version of the arcade game, Pac-Man.
08:12 Each player chooses a Pac-Man and places it in its matching color starting space
08:16 on the game board.
08:17 Yeah, I definitely wouldn't have another child playing this game.
08:20 No.
08:21 Definitely not.
08:22 Very safety conscious, Callum.
08:23 Yeah, definitely.
08:24 You have to be at least, don't you?
08:25 Yeah, especially away from babies because babies eat anything.
08:28 Oh, yes.
08:29 So if the ghost gets to the other Pac-Man in those moves, then it's finished moving
08:34 because it's got a Pac-Man.
08:36 So when a ghost lands on a Pac-Man, the player who owns the Pac-Man--
08:39 Translating a video game into a board game is a challenge, and the rules feel a lot less
08:43 intuitive when read out than they do with a joystick in your hand.
08:47 Oh, God.
08:48 Oh, God, have I done that right?
08:50 I won't--
08:51 Yeah.
08:52 [LAUGHTER]
08:54 Nice.
08:57 Oh, I could have gone that way and got a yellow ball.
09:00 Oh, God.
09:01 I used to like playing that Google Pac-Man.
09:03 Google?
09:04 Yeah, because they made-- if you Google Google Pac-Man, it comes up with a game
09:07 you can just play on your computer.
09:09 Oh.
09:10 Yeah, so you can play that version, and if you get so far, you get Miss Pac-Man.
09:12 So you can play with two.
09:14 One.
09:15 And then I'm going to move around here.
09:17 I used to be on here.
09:19 Not the old fashioned.
09:21 OK.
09:22 Right.
09:26 Oh, you've got the knack of that.
09:31 And then I'll move him.
09:33 There.
09:34 One.
09:35 And then I'm coming back.
09:37 [LAUGHTER]
09:38 Good move.
09:39 Well, I can't move.
09:44 So--
09:45 Why?
09:46 Because I can't go back the way I've come, and I can't move that way because you're there.
09:50 So I'm stuck there.
09:51 Oh, you can't go forward.
09:52 But I can move the corpse and have two of you.
09:55 [LAUGHTER]
10:00 Do you want to pop them in your little pot as well?
10:02 Merry Christmas.
10:03 [LAUGHTER]
10:07 Five, six.
10:09 Oh, you've got a few.
10:10 And then 12, 14, 15--
10:14 The other ones don't count.
10:15 --18, 20.
10:19 I took the two out, so 20.
10:22 You're the winner.
10:23 Yay.
10:24 [LAUGHTER]
10:26 I know.
10:27 I'm marking.
10:31 I'm quite happy with that, actually.
10:33 I like the countdown and connect four.
10:36 They didn't take loads of building, and they weren't dead complicated.
10:40 You just kind of knew what you were doing.
10:42 We asked our players what game had not come out of the box full in the loft that they wish had been there.
10:47 Monopoly is quite a good one.
10:49 Yeah.
10:50 Do you think?
10:51 No?
10:52 Yeah.
10:53 Definitely is, but I think there's probably more than one family Christmas maybe been ruined--
10:57 Been ruined by--
10:58 --by trying to pack up.
10:59 And we end with a reminder that Christmas games can cause lasting emotional scars, hilarious ones.
11:05 We were playing Pass the Porcelain, and you had to unravel it like--
11:08 Yeah.
11:09 --each time it stopped.
11:10 And it was just like a pound from Asdor or something.
11:12 And then when it got down to the bottom, all you want was a joke.
11:15 So my nephew, one was like, well, is that it?
11:18 And we're like, well, yeah, read the joke out.
11:20 And he just went, you're Christmas, you [BLEEP]
11:23 [LAUGHTER]
11:24 It's still down there.
11:25 I remember my sister just looked at us and was like, I just don't know why I bother.
11:28 That's what we're seeing in our family now all the time.
11:31 Something goes wrong, you're just like, you're Christmas, you [BLEEP]
11:34 [LAUGHTER]
11:35 God bless us everyone, not least David Lloyd Sunderland for providing the volunteers and the venue.
11:42 [MUSIC PLAYING]
11:45 [MUSIC PLAYING]
11:48 [MUSIC PLAYING]
11:52 [MUSIC PLAYING]
11:55 (upbeat music)
11:57 [MUSIC PLAYING]