Gogglebox S22E06 || Gogglebox Season22 Episode6
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TVTranscription
00:00 - Est-ce que tu as obtenu des salts de sentier pour toi-même ?
00:02 - Non, je n'ai pas eu la chance d'en obtenir.
00:05 - Il faut au moins 5 fois par jour pour aider ta concentration, Nati, car tu commences à bouger.
00:12 Ta tête commence à bouger.
00:13 - C'est un contrôle de coercivité. Ma tête ne...
00:16 - Ta tête commence à bouger, Nati.
00:18 Il serait bien d'obtenir des salts de sentier.
00:21 - Tu as raison. Je vais obtenir des salts de sentier de la pharmacie.
00:26 - Oui.
00:27 - Mais ce n'est pas ma tête qui bouge, chérie.
00:29 - Je crois que c'est ta tête.
00:30 - Non, ce n'est pas ta tête. C'est ta tête.
00:32 - Tu as mis ton programme de chute sur George.
00:39 - Ne te regarde pas, Charles.
00:42 - Tourne-la, Simon. Tourne-la.
00:44 - Oh mon Dieu !
00:46 - Je vais me faire couler les couilles et les foudre.
00:50 - C'était censé être drôle, Nati ?
00:52 - Je pense que oui.
00:53 - Qu'est-ce qu'elle fait ?
00:55 - Elle a sauté les nettles.
00:58 - Oh, wow !
00:59 - C'est fou.
01:00 - Je veux des nettles juste pour le regarder, Marie.
01:03 - Au mois où Rishi a mis le plomb sur le nord de HS2,
01:07 nous avons apprécié des grands télés.
01:10 Les Ghostbusters étaient de retour pour résoudre plus de spooks sur Discovery+.
01:15 - Rem va partir.
01:16 - Qui est là ?
01:17 - Un idiot.
01:19 - Quoi ?
01:20 - Un idiot ?
01:21 - C'est ce que je lui ai dit.
01:22 - Il m'appelle un idiot.
01:23 - Bordel !
01:26 - Bordel !
01:27 - Oma, je vais te haunter.
01:29 Si je me suis tué avant toi,
01:30 et que j'ai déjà un plan que je vais faire pour toi,
01:34 je vais me faire crever dans ta maison,
01:36 et quand tu auras des invités,
01:38 je vais me faire passer sur les chaînes adultes.
01:40 - Les gens vont regarder ta télé et se demander pourquoi tu es sur les chaînes adultes.
01:45 - Le PM était dans le seat chaud sur BBC One.
01:48 - Qu'est-ce qui passe dans ton esprit quand tu vois ça ?
01:51 - Mon travail est de transmettre pour les gens.
01:53 - Quoi ? Tu vas faire du DVD ?
01:56 - Jésus Christ !
01:57 - Il n'y a pas de moyen qu'il transmette pour les gens.
02:01 - Il est en train de transmettre.
02:03 Il est en train de transmettre comme Hermès.
02:06 - 100 %.
02:08 - Là, il y a ton parcel.
02:09 - En fait, c'est ça.
02:12 - C'est ça.
02:13 - C'est la boîte de verre que tu as ordonné, n'est-ce pas ?
02:15 - Et le chaos de la cuisine a disparu dans le nouveau drama "Boiling Point".
02:21 - Charmant. Charmant comme Abrabalton.
02:23 - C'est ton nom, c'est ce que tu fais.
02:25 - N'oublie pas, Nutty, que tu as perdu ton nerve
02:28 après avoir servi un délicieux déjeuner à Cresta,
02:32 mais elle ne voulait pas
02:34 parce qu'elle t'avait vu mélanger les noix avec tes propres mains.
02:36 - Elle a refusé mes noix, Mary.
02:38 - Dans "Blackpool"...
02:46 - As-tu mis ton éteint sur toi, Nutt ?
02:48 - C'est pas notre problème. C'est en octobre.
02:50 - T'es en train de rire. Il fait froid.
02:52 - C'est en octobre. Il fait froid.
02:54 - Ce chaud ne va pas se faire
02:56 jusqu'à ce qu'il y ait du froid dans l'air.
02:58 - Pete et sa petite soeur Sophie.
03:00 - Je vais faire un tarif de fixe-faites aussi,
03:02 donc ça va être drôle.
03:04 - Oh, bienvenue à "Standard Variable", mes amis.
03:06 - Eh bien, non, ce n'est pas ça
03:08 parce que j'ai un accord chaud avant
03:10 les augmentations de gaz.
03:12 - J'ai été sur "Variable"
03:14 à cause de la crise de coût de vie.
03:16 C'était un voyage de pieds blancs, je te le dis.
03:18 - C'est un voyage de pieds blancs pour moi
03:20 parce que ça s'arrête, littéralement, cette semaine.
03:22 Donc, on va probablement avoir
03:24 tout notre temps d'usage de l'hiver
03:26 dans les 10 prochaines journées,
03:28 puis on va le faire sortir.
03:30 - Le soir de saturdais,
03:32 la quiz circulaire favorisée de tout le monde
03:34 nous a mis en tournée sur BBC1.
03:36 - Ça me rappelle "All Fair".
03:38 - Oui, les Walsers.
03:40 - Ça va venir, "All Fair".
03:42 - La semaine prochaine.
03:44 - Apparemment, il souffre de la crise financière.
03:46 J'ai regardé un programme sur lui.
03:48 - C'est la 2e fois.
03:50 - Ce qui le dérive, c'est ce sentiment
03:52 qu'il n'a jamais assez d'argent pour se sentir en sécurité.
03:54 ♪ ♪ ♪
03:56 ♪ ♪ ♪
03:58 ♪ ♪ ♪
04:00 - Yeah!
04:02 - You know!
04:04 - The wheel!
04:06 - Who's it gonna be?
04:08 It's the contestant Will!
04:10 - In the show, we met contestant Chris
04:12 who had big plans for a big win.
04:14 - Well, I'm getting married this year.
04:16 So, honeymoon, bigger wedding, free bar.
04:18 - That is girls, isn't it?
04:20 Having a wedding with a free bar.
04:22 - And it turned out he'd made it to the final round
04:24 and was playing for 50 grand.
04:26 - There are going to be three new categories
04:28 from which this final question will come.
04:30 It's either going to be on marriage...
04:32 - Marriage, ooh!
04:34 - Well, he should get marriage,
04:36 because he's getting married.
04:38 - Fish...
04:40 - I don't think I'd want fish to heal.
04:42 - Or Eurovision.
04:44 - Oh!
04:46 - What do you reckon it's going to land on?
04:48 - Marriage.
04:50 - I think if it were me, I'd like fish.
04:52 - It's gonna be...
04:54 fish!
04:56 - Oh!
04:58 - I know me bloody trout from me kippers.
05:00 - Which of these fish is also known
05:02 as an "all mouth"
05:04 because of its huge mouth?
05:06 - It's monk. Monk.
05:08 - Tuna, rainbow trout, monkfish, or Dover sole?
05:10 - Yes, monk!
05:12 - Are you sure, Jenny? - Monk.
05:14 - It's monkfish. - Yeah? - Yeah.
05:16 - OK. - Monkfish is the...
05:18 Which one's that? Is that the big flat one, is it?
05:20 - No, that's a sole! - Yeah, that's not a very big mouth.
05:22 - No. - Shaun sorts him out, the monkfish.
05:24 - He knows nothing about fish.
05:26 - Right, two seconds.
05:28 - Is he gonna be a guess?
05:30 - They don't seem too sure, though, innit?
05:32 - Dover sole. - Dover sole.
05:34 - No! No! Rub it out! Rub it out!
05:36 - Oh!
05:40 - Oh!
05:42 - I told you, didn't I?
05:44 - Shaun Walsh has just fucking ruined his wedding day.
05:46 - Oh!
05:48 - 50,000 pounds!
05:50 - I can't believe Shaun's got the cheek to go...
05:54 - Pfft!
05:56 - Who's it gonna be? Spin the contestant wheel.
05:58 - What's the chance of Chris coming back up?
06:00 - Well, one in three, innit?
06:02 - Oi! - Oi, faggot, Chris!
06:06 - No, it's Chris again!
06:08 - Celebrities. Who has been married the most times?
06:10 - Oh!
06:12 - I've never even been married once.
06:14 - Justin Bieber, Jennifer Lopez, Katy Perry, Chris Pratt.
06:16 - Not a clue, Mary.
06:18 - Jennifer Lopez. - Yeah.
06:20 - Come on. - Isn't she known for that, anyway?
06:22 - She's known for that, yeah, cos she went back and forth,
06:24 back and forth. - Yeah.
06:26 - Right, Justin Bieber's only been married once.
06:28 Jennifer Lopez is... she's been married two times.
06:30 - JLo's been married more than twice.
06:32 - She has. - Katy Perry, I think she's been married twice.
06:34 - OK, Rosie knows her stuff.
06:36 - Rosie's talking with confidence.
06:38 I trust Rosie.
06:40 - Chris Pratt, which one is he?
06:42 - Avengers, Guardians of the Galaxy. - Hello.
06:44 - He's married to... what's-his-face's daughter now,
06:46 and he was married to another actress before.
06:48 - Time's running out, Rosie, come on!
06:50 - And I remember he was married before that,
06:52 just to wonder, nobody, I'm sure it was.
06:54 - Out of time!
06:56 - OK, OK. - Chris Pratt.
06:58 - Chris Pratt's been locked in.
07:00 - Are they going Chris Pratt? - Are you sure?
07:02 - Really? - He's gonna look at Chris Pratt
07:04 and he's literally wrong.
07:06 - We so hope that you have won tonight's show.
07:08 - Oh, my days. Please not again.
07:10 Please. - He can't lose twice.
07:12 - Oh, shit!
07:18 - No!
07:20 - It's JLo.
07:22 - What's the answer? - Gotta be.
07:24 - I knew it! - See?
07:26 She's known for that, she's Jennifer on the blog for a reason.
07:28 I'm sorry.
07:30 - It's horrible!
07:32 - How the hell has Chris managed to get it wrong twice?
07:36 His wife will be divorcing him
07:38 before she's even married to him.
07:40 - They'll barely be able to do tap water on arrival at this rate.
07:42 - Spin the contestant wheel!
07:46 - He can't come back up again, surely.
07:48 He's coming up more than the weeds in my garden.
07:50 - Let me guess.
07:54 - No. - Again?
07:58 - I'd be fuming if I was sat down there.
08:00 - I would. I would. I would.
08:02 - It's fixed.
08:04 - Which country has hosted the Eurovision Song Contest
08:06 the most times?
08:08 - Oh, God. - Oh, shit, I've broken it.
08:10 - I don't know,
08:12 but United Kingdom or Sweden, I'm thinking.
08:14 - I'm thinking Sweden, Ellie.
08:16 - I think United Kingdom. Has it been, like, twice?
08:18 - Three times, Ellie. - Last year, remember,
08:20 the Ukraine won it.
08:22 But we hosted it. - We did.
08:24 - So it could be the UK. - Four. Could be the UK.
08:26 - Should we go United Kingdom?
08:28 - Oh, no, Sweden!
08:30 - God!
08:32 - She's changed her mind now. We should never change our minds.
08:34 - Let's go United Kingdom, then.
08:36 - It's not that man!
08:38 - She's lost him his money on.
08:40 - Why does he keep going with what they're saying?
08:42 Because they keep getting it wrong.
08:44 - Ellie tried her absolute best to help you.
08:46 - Look at his face. He knows.
08:48 He knows it's wrong.
08:50 - Oh, God. I can't watch.
08:52 - Have you won, or is there no winner tonight?
08:54 - Have I just wasted the last hour of my life?
08:56 - (laughs)
08:58 - Ah! - Yes!
09:02 - Oh, yes! - He's done it!
09:04 - Oh, he actually was.
09:06 - (laughs)
09:08 This whole time, we were thinking Sweden.
09:10 - Just gonna...
09:12 - In the hall...
09:16 - Is it gone? - Yeah.
09:20 - Stop doing that!
09:22 - Best friends Jenny and Lee.
09:24 - Stop going.
09:26 What are you doing it like that for?
09:28 Just blow your nose.
09:30 - I am. - Well, why go like that after we're going?
09:32 - Because I can feel it moving.
09:34 - Well, blow it properly. - No!
09:36 If I blow it, I can't tell whether it's still stuck.
09:38 - Oh.
09:40 (sniffs)
09:42 Stop it!
09:44 That's disgusting!
09:46 - It's gone.
09:48 - Why? How do you know it's gone now?
09:50 - Because it's flapping.
09:52 It flaps.
09:54 - On Thursday night,
09:56 we snuggled up to our favourite veterinary drama
09:58 in the Yorkshire Dales on Channel 5.
10:00 - Oh, I love all creatures,
10:02 great and small.
10:04 - No idea what it is. - Oh, don't be silly.
10:06 James Herriot!
10:08 - This is better than the reality version
10:10 of James Herriot, you know,
10:12 the Yorkshire vet, 'cause this one just has
10:14 a cosy storyline.
10:16 - It's not about orifices, is it? - No.
10:18 (musique douce)
10:20 (sifflement)
10:22 - This is our man, James.
10:24 - James Herriot is the vet of all vets.
10:26 - That's good, isn't it? Is this in the olden days?
10:28 - Yeah.
10:30 (musique douce)
10:32 - I just love
10:34 programmes that are about Yorkshire.
10:36 - I just love out in Yorkshire.
10:38 - Yorkshire's famous for so many good things,
10:40 isn't it? - Puddings.
10:42 - Tea.
10:44 That's about it, really, isn't it, actually?
10:46 (musique douce)
10:48 (sifflement)
10:50 - Whoa!
10:52 - He almost killed the whippet!
10:54 - You can't have a vet run a dog over.
10:56 - Well, it's good for business.
10:58 (laughter)
11:00 - What way you going?
11:02 - What way you going?
11:04 - All right, mister.
11:06 (crash)
11:12 - Did he just throw an egg at James' car?
11:14 - He's made an enemy.
11:16 - Oh, he's been egged.
11:18 - Good Lord.
11:24 - He's a cheeky little shit, isn't he?
11:26 - Right then, are we ready?
11:28 (cheering)
11:30 - So the first duck under that bridge wins.
11:32 - That's James' wife in the red coat.
11:34 She's lovely.
11:36 - Three, quack!
11:38 - Oh, a duck race.
11:40 Oh, I love a duck race. - What's a duck race?
11:42 - It's where you get a duck and then you make them race.
11:44 (laughter)
11:46 - Oh, they were all bored shitless back then, weren't they?
11:50 - Yeah.
11:52 - You've got really nothing to do.
11:54 - Oh!
11:58 - What's that?
12:00 - Oh, someone's throwing stones at the ducks!
12:02 Who's that little bastard?
12:04 - Oh, that's wee Mewsons from earlier.
12:06 - Wee twat.
12:10 - Here we go, James, you can have a word, I think.
12:12 - Oh!
12:18 Oh, has he left the dog?
12:20 - It's all right, little one.
12:22 - Oh, it doesn't look right, that dog, does it?
12:26 - There's good make-up on that dog, isn't it?
12:28 - I know. - How do you get a dog to act vulnerable?
12:30 - Let's have a wee look at you, shall we?
12:32 You poorly little fella.
12:34 - Oh, look at his eyes, Lee. Look at his...
12:36 Oh, bless it.
12:38 - He does look pale, though, that dog.
12:40 He does look pale. - It's a white fucking dog, Julie.
12:42 - Oh!
12:46 - What the heck?
12:48 - Oh, he's a little bastard.
12:50 You little sod, I'd grab his...
12:52 I'd slap his arse.
12:54 - Stay away from him!
12:58 - What was that about? - The urchin.
13:00 - As if he'd just suck up on James Herriot.
13:02 - For stroking his dog?
13:04 - What's going on? I don't remember this.
13:06 - This was a nice Sunday evening chat.
13:08 - A bit later, we saw a little hand
13:10 tapping at the vet's back door.
13:12 - Oh, wait, who's this?
13:14 - Is that the boy?
13:16 - Oh, his dog's took a funny turn, I bet.
13:20 - My dog's dead.
13:22 - Oh, Wesley's brought the dog to him.
13:28 - It's heartbreaking when your dog's not well.
13:32 It really is.
13:34 - You have to help him, mister.
13:36 - Oh, it's messed on now, has it?
13:38 - You've changed your tune.
13:40 - The shoe's on the other foot now.
13:42 Or should I say clogging those days.
13:44 - This is something called hyperimmunosedum.
13:46 It helps the body fight the infection.
13:48 - Oh, he's giving him a booster.
13:50 Like a booster shot, innit? Like steroids.
13:52 - I've had him since he were a pup.
13:54 He's my best pal in the world.
13:56 - Oh, he's had him since he were a pup.
13:58 He's his best pal in the world.
14:00 Don't know how you take it.
14:02 - Don't know how you take it, but that's how we talk!
14:04 - I'll do everything I can.
14:06 I promise you.
14:08 - I bet that's all he's got.
14:10 Poor little bugger.
14:12 - I don't want him to die.
14:18 - Oh.
14:20 - I don't want him to die, either.
14:22 - Oh, Jenny.
14:24 - Duke! Come on, Duke!
14:30 Come on, Duke!
14:32 Come on! Duke!
14:34 - Oh, Duke!
14:36 - He's survived.
14:38 - Oh, look at the dog!
14:40 - Well, that injection's obviously worked.
14:42 - I can see why you like it up here.
14:46 - Mr. Harriet.
14:48 - Mr. Harriet.
14:50 Respect. That's what it is.
14:52 - He's a lucky dog.
14:54 I don't think he could wish
14:56 for a better owner.
14:58 - Debatable.
15:00 - I'm thinking that.
15:02 - Although I think James is, like,
15:04 keeping his friends close and his enemies closer,
15:06 I think as this series progresses,
15:08 he exacts his revenge.
15:10 - Really? - Yeah. - Yeah, well, we don't know
15:12 what he's got in store for Wesley. - Yeah, exactly.
15:14 - Right, you need to help me birth this cow.
15:16 Get in there.
15:26 - In Leeds...
15:28 - ...sisters Ellie and Izzy.
15:42 - Oh, yeah!
15:44 Yeah, I know where you said it on!
15:46 - Yeah.
15:48 - Did she?
15:58 - Oh, everybody loved it.
16:00 - Do you know what?
16:06 It actually felt all right, that.
16:08 I quite liked it.
16:10 - On Saturday night,
16:12 it was wall-to-wall spandex
16:14 on BBC One.
16:16 - You see, the only good thing about Strictly
16:18 is even if you make it total full of yourself,
16:20 at least you've got
16:22 fitter and more athletic
16:24 during the training.
16:26 - (laughing)
16:28 - I love the music, Ron.
16:38 - Oh!
16:40 - It's Des Lennis!
16:46 - Don't you know, Giles,
17:04 a lot of people live for the Strictly season?
17:06 - Mmh.
17:08 - They just keep going until the Strictly season.
17:10 - And a lot more people live for the Bake Off season.
17:12 - Yeah.
17:14 - Ahoy there!
17:22 - This is Panto.
17:28 - Let's hope it's not Les Misérables, Nata.
17:30 - Oh.
17:32 - Oh!
17:34 - Oh!
17:36 - Watch the lady, watch the lady dance.
17:40 Keep watching the lady.
17:42 - Oh!
17:46 - He took all that time to get on the dance floor?
17:48 - He hasn't even danced yet.
17:54 He just keeps going like that.
17:56 - Ah!
17:58 - Look at that.
18:04 Quick little fight.
18:06 - I'm Les. - You are?
18:08 - One and two and one and two.
18:14 Oh, oh, out of time.
18:16 - The wee toe tap. - That's quite nice.
18:18 - He wee boories on. - Oh, he looks quite cute there.
18:24 - I do feel like the professional's doing a lot of the dancing here.
18:28 - Yes.
18:30 - He's the strong pillar that she dances around.
18:32 Without him, she would be nothing.
18:34 - Is this the samba?
18:38 - No, not really.
18:40 - Them hips are in action. They're in sport mode.
18:42 - He wants to be careful he's going to pop one out, I know.
18:44 - Oh!
18:48 - Go on, Les!
18:52 - Oh!
18:54 - Oh!
18:56 - He can jump a solid inch off the floor.
18:58 - Every time his leg goes up, his mouth opens.
19:00 He's like one of their puppets.
19:02 - He's like having a drop of ventriloquism.
19:04 - Yeah.
19:06 - Oh, he's going away from the judges.
19:10 - So they can't see him.
19:12 - Do you think he's enjoying it?
19:14 - Oh!
19:18 - He's proper getting it, the way he's moving.
19:20 - He's proper getting it, the way he's moving.
19:22 - Yes!
19:28 - Well done, Les!
19:30 - I'm still waiting for him to dance.
19:32 - More hip replacement than hip.
19:34 - Yeah.
19:36 - Did you get that, Mary?
19:38 - Yeah, good joke.
19:40 - More hip replacement than hip.
19:42 - OK, darling, don't labour it.
19:44 - As a birthday treat,
19:46 Mel booked for me to go on that electric barge.
19:48 - As a birthday treat,
19:50 Mel booked for me to go on that electric barge.
19:52 - That one in Derby city centre.
19:54 - And it's got like 15 locations that it takes you on.
19:56 - The Siddiquis.
19:58 - So listen to these locations that you can go on
20:00 on this canal trip.
20:02 - So number one, Sporkston. Very exciting.
20:04 - Then number two, a toll house.
20:06 - Number three, Bridge Inn.
20:08 - Number four, Aldi.
20:10 - And then number five, Wicks.
20:12 - And then number five, Wicks.
20:14 - Yeah, this is kind of going downhill.
20:16 - It really is, isn't it?
20:18 - Yeah.
20:20 - That's brilliant, isn't it?
20:22 - I'll be like, "Oh, can I get off to get some peanut butter
20:24 "and a plasterboard, please?"
20:26 - That's so stupid. They've got this list of 15 locations.
20:28 - Take me to ye olde Wicks.
20:30 - Sunday night saw the return of some unwanted guests
20:32 on Discovery Plus.
20:34 - I don't believe, I must admit,
20:36 I am a bit of a believer.
20:38 - Do you?
20:40 - Yeah, I am a bit of a believer.
20:42 - I'm surprised you're sleeping.
20:44 - I'm the Ouija board.
20:46 - The what? - The Ouija board.
20:48 - The what? - The Ouija board.
20:50 - Is it the Ouija board? - Ouija.
20:52 - Ouija board. - The Ouija board.
20:54 - Across the UK...
20:56 Terrified homeowners are being plagued by the paranormal.
21:02 - At least they're homeowners, though. That's something.
21:04 - As if homeowners have not got enough on the plate
21:06 to be rising mortgage and energy costs,
21:08 they've now got to be petrified of the paranormal as well.
21:10 - What the f*** was that?
21:12 - Whoa!
21:14 - I saw a man's head.
21:16 - Oh, Barry, give it a rest.
21:18 - If you remember, we allegedly had some man sitting at the fire
21:26 and he'd been there for many, many years.
21:28 He was a simple fellow
21:30 and he just liked to look at the fire.
21:32 - Yeah.
21:34 - And he was cleansed, wasn't he?
21:36 - Yeah.
21:38 - In the programme, we caught up with Ian, Jane and Barry
21:40 in a 1930s semi.
21:42 - Who are we talking to?
21:44 - Rem's going off.
21:46 - Who's here?
21:48 - An idiot.
21:50 - Oh, I heard that then.
21:52 - That's it.
21:54 - We're all thinking it.
21:56 - They're antagonising the ghost.
21:58 - They're bloody asking for it now.
22:00 - Who's coming? The demon?
22:04 - The demon?
22:06 - Who you coming for?
22:08 - Barry!
22:10 - He just said Barry.
22:12 - Every time, Barry.
22:14 - It's always for Barry.
22:16 This is the thing with the demons,
22:18 they always pick the weak one.
22:20 - It's challenging me,
22:22 so I'm going to provoke it in the hope
22:24 it will give up its identity.
22:26 - Don't provoke.
22:28 - I give you full permission
22:30 to physically attack me.
22:32 - Brave man, Barry.
22:34 - Barry, no-one likes a hero.
22:36 - That whisper just said, "Ready?"
22:40 - Nah.
22:42 - I can't wait for Barry to get happy-slapped.
22:44 - Why is there a sound
22:46 like some kind of gateway opening?
22:48 - How convenient a gateway is opened.
22:50 - What's a gateway sound like?
22:52 - Eeeeee!
22:54 - What the fuck is that noise?
22:56 - I don't know.
22:58 - It's like an opening.
23:00 - I don't know.
23:04 - Oh!
23:06 - Oh, where's Barry? Oh, Barry!
23:08 - (laughing)
23:10 - Did you just see Barry flying?
23:14 - Is he OK?
23:18 - Batsy, you all right?
23:20 - No, he's not all right, Jane, he's on the fucking floor.
23:22 - What's the big trouble, Batsy, bear gauche?
23:24 - I've just been punched in the face.
23:26 - Oh.
23:28 - An unbelievable force hit me.
23:30 - What the fuck?
23:32 - That's the first time I've seen somebody
23:34 being punched by a ghost.
23:36 - I know Barry's been punched before.
23:38 - Has he?
23:40 - I command you in the name of Jesus Christ...
23:42 - What are they screaming at now?
23:44 - It's not your house.
23:46 - Get fucked.
23:48 - Oh, get fucked.
23:50 - Get fucked.
23:52 - Oh, I'd get out of there now, would you?
23:54 - Get fucked, Barry.
23:56 - Barry needs a breather, so we head downstairs.
23:58 - Of course, after all that!
24:00 - Of course! He's been through a lot.
24:02 - Is it fake or is it not?
24:04 - Well, you can't say it's not,
24:06 cos we don't know, do we?
24:08 It's the unknown, innit?
24:10 - Yeah.
24:12 - I'm only saying this because I don't want a ghost
24:14 following me home.
24:16 - Mary? - Yes?
24:26 - Are you there? - Yes, you know I am.
24:28 I've got something to show you.
24:30 - Right.
24:32 - It's quite an interesting development, actually.
24:36 - What on earth is that?
24:42 Oh, for God's sake, Charles!
24:44 Don't be so stupid.
24:46 Where did you get that from?
24:48 Oh, for goodness sake!
24:50 What on earth is that?
24:54 - It's quite something, isn't it, Mary?
24:56 - Well, what animal is it?
24:58 - I think it could be a water buffalo.
25:00 - Where? - It's in very good shape.
25:02 - Where did you get it?
25:04 - This ear's seen a bit of wear and tear.
25:08 - Hang on a second, Nutty.
25:10 Is that a stage prop?
25:12 Where did you get that?
25:14 - I found it in the same skip.
25:16 - Oh, for goodness sake!
25:18 - I couldn't resist it, Mary.
25:20 Its head was sticking out of the skip.
25:22 - We don't have room in the cottage for a...
25:24 my brother's 60th birthday coming up.
25:26 - He won't want that.
25:28 - He will want that over his barbecue.
25:30 - On Sunday, we got to see our Prime Minister
25:33 getting a good grilling on BBC One.
25:35 - Do you want any toast with your tea?
25:37 - No. A cup of tea would be nice.
25:39 - Well, do you want no toast?
25:41 - No.
25:43 - We got that interview
25:45 on Laura Kingsberg
25:47 and Richie Sounack.
25:49 - Oh!
25:53 - What the fuck about Laura?
25:55 When she gives someone the grilling
25:57 and they don't give her a straight answer,
25:59 she doesn't back off, she goes straight back in again,
26:01 doesn't she?
26:03 - Are you just ignoring me?
26:05 - No! I'm watching the telly.
26:07 - He's here now, and as John was saying,
26:09 we're delighted to have you here for a live interview.
26:11 - Look at him sitting up straight.
26:13 I must sit up straight.
26:15 - You see, I can't believe you fancy Richie Sounack.
26:17 - I don't! You called him Dishy-Rishy!
26:19 - We are sitting in Salford,
26:21 and we're going to be delivering a train to Manchester.
26:23 Yes or no?
26:25 - You ain't getting a yes or no.
26:27 - Will HS2, high-speed rail,
26:29 come to this part of the world?
26:31 - It was meant to be Manchester to London via Birmingham
26:33 and Leeds to London via Birmingham.
26:35 And now it's looking like
26:37 it's just going to be Birmingham to London.
26:39 - What about us at the end of the line?
26:41 - Not what the north.
26:43 - They're picking us northerners off one by one.
26:45 - There's already spades in the ground on HS2,
26:47 and we're getting on with delivering it.
26:49 - There's spades in the ground in Manchester.
26:51 - Yes or no, is it coming here?
26:53 - I'm not going to comment on all this speculation.
26:55 - Yes or no?
26:57 - You couldn't have given a straighter question than that,
26:59 just tell us, is it coming to Manchester or not?
27:01 - You are the Prime Minister of this country.
27:03 This is not asking you about speculation.
27:05 You're not a columnist.
27:07 You're not a backbencher with an axe to grind.
27:09 You're not someone from the rail industry.
27:11 - Oooh!
27:13 - Richie looks like there's been high-speed rail
27:15 going through his undies.
27:17 - You are the Prime Minister of this country.
27:19 This is your decision.
27:21 - Yeah, if you can't answer it, who can answer it?
27:23 - Exactly.
27:25 - The buck stops with you, mate.
27:27 - How can he worm his way out of that world?
27:29 - She's got him in a chuckle.
27:31 - There is Laura, hasn't she?
27:33 - Yeah, she's got him, hasn't she? Come on, tell us.
27:35 - Is this going to happen or not?
27:37 - As I said, we've got spades in the ground.
27:39 I'm not going to comment on further speculation.
27:41 - Because he knows it's not speculation.
27:43 He knows it's true.
27:45 - If I said to you, Charles,
27:47 "Have you done the washing up yet?"
27:49 - I'd say, "To be clear,
27:51 there are spades in the ground."
27:53 - Yeah.
27:55 - Let's look at what the public associates with you.
27:57 We did this with Ed Davey, the Lib Dem leader.
27:59 We'll do it again with Keir Starmer.
28:01 We're using what's called a word cloud.
28:03 - So a word cloud, like the words that people say the most
28:05 are the bigger words.
28:07 - Asking people what they associate a leader with.
28:09 - I just want to give you one last kick in
28:11 before we have to cut you off.
28:13 - Let's get on our ropes now.
28:15 Let's deliver the knockout blow.
28:17 - Now you can see there, rightly or wrongly,
28:19 what many people associate with you.
28:21 - Himself, rich, the rich, money.
28:23 - Does that worry you if people might feel you're out of touch?
28:25 - I mean, all the nice words,
28:27 or what may be considered nice,
28:29 are all very, very, very small.
28:31 - Yeah, you can hardly see or read them.
28:33 - They're that small, some of them.
28:35 - What's that little one? I don't give a shit.
28:37 - What goes through your mind when you see that?
28:39 - Because he has got feelings, I suppose.
28:41 - Yeah, yeah, he has.
28:43 - My job is to deliver for people,
28:45 and that's why we've just been talking a lot about this net zero decision,
28:47 which I've made.
28:49 - Hang on, wishy-washy, don't you say? I just don't like it.
28:51 I just don't think that that is me.
28:53 And just explain it. Don't start going off on a bloody tangent.
28:55 - Prime Minister, thank you so much for coming
28:57 and giving us your time this morning.
28:59 - Laura put him through his paces there, didn't she?
29:01 But I'm still none the wiser about what he stands for.
29:03 - Do you know what?
29:05 I've gone completely off conference season.
29:07 - I think we've gone off politics, haven't we?
29:09 - We've got.
29:11 - And we've gone off all three parties.
29:13 We're not represented by any of those parties now.
29:15 - No.
29:17 - Although I'm probably on the side of the Greens, Nottie.
29:19 - I've got...
29:21 - I would introduce sheep onto the M4.
29:23 - But Nottie, the...
29:25 - As a traffic calming measure.
29:27 - In Leeds...
29:29 - Yes, so Ian the Gardener came to do my grass this morning.
29:31 - Oh, he came to do mine yesterday?
29:33 - Yes, he did.
29:35 - And he's got a lot of sheep.
29:37 - Oh, he came to do mine yesterday?
29:39 - Did he?
29:41 - Yeah.
29:43 - But I didn't even realise that he was coming,
29:45 so I came downstairs in my knickers and bra.
29:47 - Sisters Ellie and Izzy.
29:49 - I copped for him and then I ducked.
29:51 - Oh!
29:53 - And then, so I opened the dryer,
29:55 took my clothes out,
29:57 and then literally ducked,
29:59 ducked and ran like this.
30:01 - Mission impossible-ed.
30:03 - Yeah.
30:05 - It was like you were walking through lasers.
30:07 - Yeah.
30:09 Until then, I came into the hallway
30:11 and then I quickly got dressed and then I was like,
30:13 "Oh, hi Ian!"
30:15 And he was like, "Hiya!" And then I ran up and hid upstairs
30:17 because I was scared to death that he'd seen me in my underwear.
30:19 - On Sunday night,
30:21 BBC One raised our blood pressure
30:23 with its brand new drama,
30:25 set in a kitchen.
30:27 - A boiling point, Nottie.
30:29 - Is that, this is the spin-off from the film?
30:31 - Yeah.
30:33 - Is it about Stephen Graham?
30:35 - No, I've not seen it, but it's about chefs, isn't it?
30:37 - Yeah.
30:39 - About working in a kitchen.
30:41 - I couldn't do with working in a kitchen,
30:43 it'd be far too stressful for me.
30:45 - Like, even the titles of this,
30:51 I'm stressed.
30:53 - Yeah.
30:55 - I might like this,
30:59 because I love to think I'm Chef Ramsay.
31:01 - Yeah, you're not.
31:03 - I remember Lucy when she worked in the chippy
31:05 when she was 16, she quit after a few weeks.
31:07 Hated it.
31:09 - Yeah, you've got to have a skin thicker than an armadillo.
31:11 - Yeah.
31:13 - Because people are horrible.
31:15 - I hated your Yorkshire puddings.
31:19 - Oh, every time you mention
31:21 the bloody Yorkshire puddings.
31:23 - Well, it's here from Yorkshire.
31:25 You should know to make a Yorkshire fucking pudding.
31:27 - Yeah, well, you want to go in your Auntie Bessie's bag
31:29 in the freezer, then,
31:31 and practise what you preach.
31:33 - Right, check on table 8.
31:35 One scouse, two cod, one pork.
31:37 - Yes, Chef.
31:39 - All right, guys, guys, can you listen up?
31:41 - That's Carly, and that's Freeman giving out the orders.
31:43 - Our special guests have just arrived,
31:45 and we've had a load of walk-ins, so we are full.
31:47 - It's a full night, you know what that means.
31:49 They're on overdrive now.
31:51 They've got to be working double fast, double efficient.
31:53 - Chef, this is Johnny.
31:55 He's here for his first Chef.
31:57 - Nice interaction, by the way, lad. Thank you.
31:59 - Oh, so they've got somebody new starting?
32:01 - Yeah. - And he's late.
32:03 Nothing worse. Oh, I can feel
32:05 the panic in my tummy.
32:07 - OK, the staff room is over there.
32:09 If you want to pop your whites on, come straight back.
32:11 - All right, get your penny on, Johnny.
32:13 - Oh, hold on a sec. Camille, how we doing on hollandaise?
32:15 - Like six portions left.
32:17 - Cool. So when you come back,
32:19 I want you to jump straight onto that, about two litres,
32:21 beef, fat, not butter. - OK.
32:23 - Yeah? - Beef, fat, not butter.
32:25 - That's the thing, when you start in a kitchen,
32:27 you get thrown in at deep end, don't you?
32:29 Think or swim.
32:31 - Serve it!
32:33 - So, hollandaise recipe?
32:35 - What? He ain't done it before.
32:37 - You haven't got a clue? - He's not a cook, then, is he?
32:39 - No, obviously not.
32:41 - Oh, and you can cook upon a hollandaise easy, can you?
32:43 - I'm getting shifted.
32:45 I'll just get stocked on a sauté.
32:47 - That looks like it's made to measure.
32:49 - For someone else.
32:51 - Just roll your sleeves up for me.
32:53 - You'll be having your sleeves hanging in the hollandaise sauce, man.
32:55 - Everything you need should be in the dry store at the back.
32:57 If you've got any problems, just shout one of the team.
32:59 - I don't even think he'd worked in a kitchen before.
33:01 - He might have just, um...
33:03 rather like Liz Truss,
33:05 thought, "Fake it to make it."
33:07 - Oh, Liz Truss is a prime example, yes.
33:09 - No. - No!
33:15 - No! - They're searching for the ingredients,
33:17 though, innit? - Yeah.
33:19 - I'm just getting started on the mayonnaise.
33:21 - Mayonnaise?
33:23 - Mayonnaise? Oh!
33:25 Mate, how are you comparing hollandaise sauce to mayonnaise?
33:27 - Nowhere near the same.
33:29 - How long on my veg?
33:31 - One minute.
33:33 - Make it 30 seconds, please.
33:35 - You can't actually call now.
33:37 - Personal call on a work time.
33:39 - Mum, you all right?
33:41 - Those aren't the food, no. - Oh, bloody hell, what's happened?
33:43 - Mum, I will call you when I've finished.
33:45 - I don't know. - About midnight, all right?
33:47 - Liz under pressure.
33:49 - Under pressure now, innit?
33:51 - It is stressful. I feel so sorry for him.
33:53 I know what it's like.
33:55 - He was a pot washer.
33:57 - It don't matter. I was a good 'un.
33:59 - What is going on tonight, Karl?
34:05 - Yeah, yeah.
34:07 - Phone's off again.
34:09 - When mum rings me at work, I have an absolute panic.
34:11 "Hi, what? What do you want? I'm busy."
34:13 "Oh, did you know Pam down the road's coming for coffee?"
34:15 "Mum, I'll call you later. Bye."
34:17 - You can't keep...
34:19 - What do you mean, a funny turn?
34:23 - Oh, wow. Something's happened.
34:25 - Which is it? Is it your arm or is it your leg?
34:27 - Sounds like she's having a stroke.
34:29 - Not tonight, mum. Don't have a stroke tonight.
34:31 - Guys, guys, we've got Liam's order through
34:33 and they've just been VIPs and...
34:35 I mean, VI, VIPs tonight, OK?
34:37 - VI, VIPs.
34:39 - That means very important.
34:41 - Very important people.
34:43 - Karlie, where are you going?
34:45 - I've just got to go out and...
34:47 - What do you mean, you've got to go out? Karlie, it's fucking manic in here.
34:49 - Freeman is my mum, all right?
34:51 There's a medical emergency. I can't get a hold of her.
34:53 I need to go make sure she is OK.
34:55 - Oh, she's only going?
34:57 - I'm going to be honest, you know,
34:59 family comes over, five portions of beef rigueur.
35:01 - Mum!
35:03 Mum!
35:07 - Oh, no.
35:09 - She better be on the floor with blood everywhere.
35:11 She better be fucking lying there, absolutely spannered.
35:13 - Mum!
35:15 - Oh, my God. What are you shouting for?
35:17 - Oh, no!
35:19 No, I will lose my shit!
35:21 - I'm all right, dear.
35:23 I've just had a bit of cramp.
35:25 - What do you want me to do now, chef?
35:27 - We've got one in the fridge there.
35:29 Make us up a fish sauce, yeah, please?
35:31 - Make us up a fish sauce, cos he's going to know what that is.
35:33 - I just feel a disaster coming.
35:35 - Yeah.
35:37 - Oh, shit, oh, shit!
35:39 It's a fire!
35:41 - Someone sort it out. - Yeah, OK.
35:43 - Quickly. - Don't worry, I've got it.
35:45 - No, no, no, Danny!
35:47 - Oh, shit!
35:49 - Oh, my goodness. What's he done?
35:51 - Everyone knows that. You don't put water on oil.
35:53 - You're a fucking idiot, lad!
35:55 Everyone fucking knew that, but you're a damn self-claimed...
35:57 - Come on, come on, please.
35:59 - This is all they need tonight, isn't it, on the important night?
36:01 He's burnt himself, the kitchen's on fire.
36:03 - Bruv, get me in that kitchen!
36:05 - When you get in the kitchen,
36:07 you get very like this, Mary. - Yeah.
36:09 - You get loss of control in the kitchen.
36:11 You become very psycho in a tight space with knives.
36:15 - In Bristol...
36:25 - So, lads, do you agree with, like,
36:27 the stuff that I put on my dating profile then?
36:29 Football, fashion, food.
36:31 - Deep... You missed deep conversations.
36:33 - About what, bruv?
36:35 - Brothers Jermaine, Twain and Tristan.
36:37 - We could talk about a lot of things, you know what I mean?
36:39 Deep conversations, we could talk about...
36:41 - So how do you feel about, like...
36:43 - The situation with climate change and that at the moment?
36:45 - Mm...
36:47 Yeah, that's a bit of a sticky one still.
36:49 - (laughter)
36:51 - This week, more singletons were getting engaged
36:55 without seeing each other on Netflix.
36:57 - Is that like dating through a wall programme?
37:01 It's always proper cringy.
37:03 - I could maybe fall in love with someone
37:05 only speaking to them through a wall
37:07 if they gave me an in-depth description
37:09 of what they look like.
37:11 - (dramatic music)
37:13 - They date in the pods. - Yeah.
37:17 - And then in order to see somebody outside of the pods,
37:19 you have to propose to them.
37:21 - Before you get to see them? - Yes.
37:23 - Right, OK. - Love is blind.
37:25 - You know what does my head in about this show?
37:27 You know when people come in and go,
37:29 "It's my last chance at love"?
37:31 You're 19. - (laughter)
37:33 - Get a life.
37:35 - Hey, what's going on?
37:37 - Who is the lovely guy that I'm talking to?
37:39 - This is Milton. - Milton!
37:41 - Milton's sterilising tablets.
37:43 - My name is Lydia. I am from Puerto Rico.
37:45 - So what do you do?
37:47 - I'm a geologist.
37:49 - That's rocks in it, geologist.
37:51 - I think so. - I think.
37:53 I'm not even joking here. I think it's a vagina doctor.
37:55 - Uh...
37:57 - I actually do. - Oh, my God.
37:59 I'm really big into metamorphic rock.
38:01 - Huh? - He's into metamorphic rock?
38:03 - What the fuck's a metamorphic rock?
38:05 - It's a rock that's metamorphic.
38:07 - So Puerto Rico has a little bit of everything.
38:09 At the north is like the karst zone,
38:11 so sedimentary, right?
38:13 - Please don't delve into the details of different rocks.
38:15 - OK, I hate sedimentary rock, but I work in oil and gas,
38:17 so I have to like it.
38:19 - This is the nerdiest bonding session ever, this is.
38:21 - It's not stable. I feel like sedimentary
38:23 is like the weak spectrum.
38:25 - What is going on here?
38:27 - They're having a full-blown conversation on a date
38:29 with a girl. OK.
38:31 - We're talking about like diagenesis sedimentary, right?
38:33 - Right, yes! - That's my shit. - Wow.
38:35 - What the fuck are they talking about? - This is niche.
38:37 - I'm not following this conversation.
38:39 - Is this flirting for geeks?
38:41 - They're having a nerd off.
38:43 - I'm gonna ask one question. - OK.
38:45 - And this is gonna determine it all. - OK.
38:47 - Oh, God, this is a killer question. - Oh, what's the question gonna be?
38:49 - Do you ever, like, get, like, quartz
38:51 and, like, plagioclase confused?
38:53 - What's he say? Do you like what?
38:55 - Quartz and plagioclase confused, I do it all the time.
38:57 - All the time.
38:59 - That was another rock-related thing, wasn't it?
39:01 I think Milton's not gonna be happy
39:03 unless there is a rock on the other side, you know.
39:05 I think he might be the first person
39:07 who's come to actually try it on with a wall.
39:09 - Hello!
39:11 - After some other dates,
39:13 Milton and Lydia had gotten even closer.
39:15 - There's still, like, gonna be, like,
39:17 a lot of things that, like, we would have to sacrifice.
39:19 Like, I would have to give up
39:21 to, like, be with you.
39:23 - What's he on about? Sacrifices to be with her?
39:25 - I probably can't be at my friend's house
39:27 at 4 in the morning playing the Wii.
39:29 - The Wii? Oh, no! - Jesus Christ!
39:31 - No, no, no!
39:33 - That just rings alarm bells for me.
39:35 You're just not mature enough, mate.
39:37 - Time flies with Wii Sports tennis.
39:39 - I've never been so sure in anything in my life,
39:41 and it's crazy.
39:43 It's absolutely crazy.
39:45 I honestly think it's gonna be amazing.
39:47 - She's giving him the green light here, isn't she?
39:49 - She's basically saying, "You pop the question,
39:51 "I'm gonna say yes."
39:53 - I'm kind of at, like, a stage where I'm like,
39:55 "Do I want to say 'fuck it' and take a risk?"
39:57 - Take a risk, Milton. Fuck it.
39:59 - It's not really the foundation for a great marriage, is it?
40:01 - Fuck it, let's take a risk on this.
40:03 - I never expected to be this sure.
40:05 I want you.
40:07 I want to be your wife.
40:09 - Oh!
40:11 - She put her heart on the line, didn't she,
40:13 and said, "I want to be your wife." Simple as.
40:15 Come on in, Milton, the ball's in your court.
40:17 - I'm not sure I'm gonna be your wife.
40:19 - I'm not sure I'm gonna be your wife.
40:21 - You were caught.
40:23 - You think you can spend the rest of your life with me?
40:25 - Just ask her!
40:27 - 100%.
40:29 - She's now, like, 100%.
40:33 - Shitting about. - 1 million percent. Come on.
40:35 - Oh, he's getting up, he's getting up.
40:39 This is it. It's happening.
40:41 - Oh.
40:43 - Oh, wow.
40:45 - Lydia, Arlene,
40:47 Vélez, González.
40:49 - That's real love. He remembered all four names there.
40:51 - You gonna be my Puerto Rican wife?
40:53 - Will you be my Puerto Rican wife?
40:55 - I love you.
40:57 - I've got a fucking Argentinian one and one for China there as well, so...
40:59 - Yes, I will be your Puerto Rican wife.
41:01 - Aw!
41:03 - I love you.
41:05 - Love you too.
41:07 - What a bunch of shite this is, Julie.
41:09 Honest to God. - Love you.
41:11 - I love you too. - Bye.
41:13 - He doesn't look like a happy guy.
41:15 He looks like he's...
41:17 - He's confused to me. - He's confused, yeah.
41:19 - I've got a feeling that's one of those
41:21 immediate regret moments. - Yeah, he's thinking,
41:23 "Fuck." - Well, he's steamed
41:25 into something here.
41:27 - Yeah. At least
41:29 it's not legally binding. - When you panic
41:31 by like this, it's no good.
41:33 - Well, normally, on a first 14
41:35 day, you change your mind. - Cooling off period.
41:37 - Cooling off period.
41:39 - Inca Philly.
41:43 - I had 52 lessons.
41:45 - Do you ever attempt a test?
41:47 - No. They weren't for me.
41:49 - Dave and his wife Shirley.
41:51 - I would have loved to have drove, but
41:53 there was nothing
41:55 was clicking on the
41:57 practical. - No?
41:59 - No. I borrowed
42:01 somebody's car one day,
42:03 and, uh,
42:05 remember they used to be fencing up by,
42:07 um, it's called 10 degrees
42:09 now. - Ah. - What was it called before?
42:11 - Well, it doesn't matter, really. - Well, it was railings.
42:13 I nearly took them with me.
42:15 It was a nice car,
42:17 too.
42:19 - Till you had it.
42:21 - Yeah.
42:23 - Right and early on Friday, we woke up to some
42:25 breaking news on the BBC.
42:27 - Go on, go and stick a couple of slices in.
42:29 Four slice. - I've only got
42:31 seeded wholemeal.
42:33 - You always make me
42:35 a nice cup of tea. Do you know that? - I know I do.
42:37 I've done it for 50 years now.
42:39 - You started watching the news again. - I want to know
42:41 about the tree.
42:43 - Welcome to Breakfast with Charlie State
42:45 and Sarah Campbell.
42:47 - Why has Sarah Campbell got like an evening frock on
42:49 when it's morning? - Maybe she's going
42:51 bottomless brunch after. - Now, there are
42:53 hundreds of millions of trees in the UK,
42:55 but few of them are as beloved
42:57 or as well-known as the sycamore
42:59 on Hadrian's Wall.
43:01 - You're gonna be outraged at this. I've heard it on radio
43:03 when I was out for my run this morning,
43:05 and I was running past Park when it happened.
43:07 - But on Wednesday night, it was deliberately
43:09 felled. - What? - Cut down.
43:11 - What's the point?
43:13 - No idea. I just can't...
43:15 You know, I feel sick even listening to the story
43:17 about it. It has been a landmark
43:19 for well over 200 years.
43:21 - Oh, there's that board up north.
43:23 Seriously.
43:25 Like, the kids are out here cutting trees down
43:27 with 200-year-old history.
43:29 - It became known as the
43:31 Sycamore Gap Tree.
43:33 Now, some online maps have already
43:35 changed that name to Sycamore Stump.
43:37 - Flipping hell. Trees not been
43:39 down a day. - Oh, that's insensitive,
43:41 isn't it?
43:43 Already? Alison Freeman can tell
43:45 us more. Good morning, Alison.
43:47 - Oh, God. She's at the scene. - The last time
43:49 I was here, you know, it was there in all its glory,
43:51 and now it really has been cut
43:53 down. - Hey, is that it in the background
43:55 falling over? - As you can see, it's now a
43:57 crime scene. There's police tape
43:59 on the floor, and a single flower
44:01 has been left. - A crime scene?
44:03 - Well, yeah. - Where's the white tent?
44:05 - This is a place
44:07 where people come to celebrate
44:09 birthdays and proposals. People
44:11 come to have poignant moments, to scatter
44:13 ashes. - Oh, that's awful.
44:15 - You see, going to a stamp
44:17 ain't gonna have the same effect,
44:19 is it? Getting married
44:21 by the stamp. - And it's gone. It's been
44:23 taken from us, and I've no idea why
44:25 anybody would do that. - I just don't
44:27 understand why you would cut it down.
44:29 It's not
44:31 like it's bloody blocking someone's
44:33 sunlight in the garden. - Yeah.
44:35 - It's not a neighbour's dispute, is it?
44:37 - No. - Where, you know, you've blocked somebody's
44:39 drive, so you've gone, "You're gonna have it."
44:41 - It's a train
44:43 rounding its business in the arse end of nowhere.
44:45 - So, is there anything that can be done
44:47 at all? - It's a very
44:49 healthy tree. We can see that now. - Oh,
44:51 could they try and replant something?
44:53 - It may well regrow a coppice from
44:55 the stump. - Couldn't you just get a crane,
44:57 use no nails,
44:59 stick it round it, and just glue it back on?
45:01 - Yeah, because it's a very clean cut, isn't it?
45:03 - Yeah. - Obviously, the investigation goes
45:05 on, and, you know, here are some
45:07 photos just to remind people of what
45:09 the tree looked like in its full glory.
45:11 - That's how it'll want to be remembered.
45:13 - Yeah.
45:15 [Music]
45:17 - Oh.
45:19 - It's a bit like Angel of the North, isn't it?
45:21 - Yeah. - Do you know what I mean? - Stonehenge.
45:23 - Yeah.
45:25 [Music]
45:27 - Look how beautiful that is. - Is that real life?
45:29 - Yes. - That is the type
45:31 of picture that you see on Instagram with a meaningful
45:33 quote, isn't it? - Yeah.
45:35 [Music]
45:37 - That's not so good,
45:39 to be honest. - Well...
45:41 - It's a bit, that one.
45:43 [Music]
45:45 - Look at that. It's like a
45:47 PowerPoint presentation of a funeral.
45:49 [Music]
45:53 - This is really sad. I don't know why I'm getting emotional.
45:55 - Do you know what I want, Ellie?
45:57 Justice for the tree.
45:59 [Music]
46:01 [Music]
46:03 [Music]
46:05 - I suppose you could sit on the stump.
46:07 [Music]
46:09 [Music]
46:11 - Now, because of the football,
46:13 next week, Gogglebox will be back at 10 o'clock.
46:15 Well, streaming and
46:17 steaming right now, Boiling Point, the film
46:19 that came before the series, all shot in
46:21 one 90-minute take. And tiptoeing
46:23 very carefully onto Channel 4,
46:25 don't look down. Ten vertigo-suffering
46:27 celebs up on a 300-foot-high
46:29 eye-wire, all for Stand Up
46:31 to Cancer. Watch Tuesday at
46:33 9.30.
46:35 [Music]
46:37 [Music]
46:39 [Music]