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00:08:59Darling, the next time you come on the stage before I finish my bows,
00:09:04I will drown you with this Pepto-Vintage water.
00:09:07But Yvette, darling, you know how you creak when you bend.
00:09:11Creak?
00:09:13Why, you old fossil, why, don't you know that I was the toast of Paris?
00:09:18Burnt toast.
00:09:20Why, I would not stand for this insult another second.
00:09:24Captain Jackson, I demand that Mr. Doakes and his old fossil there,
00:09:28that they accept my apology.
00:09:29Huh?
00:09:30Well, I mean that they apologize.
00:09:32What do you mean apologize?
00:09:33Why, she called my wife an old bag.
00:09:35She said fossil, dear.
00:09:37All right, so you're an old fossil.
00:09:39How dare you, Henry Doakes?
00:09:40Ladies, gentlemen, please, let's not call each other names.
00:09:44No, let the audience do then.
00:09:46Oh, shut up, you.
00:09:47Now, now, now, I'll pay you all just as soon as I get it.
00:09:51Yvette, get back to work.
00:09:53I've put your two passengers in cabin B.
00:09:56You can give me what they paid you now.
00:09:58Oh, yes, yes, slip my memory.
00:10:01There you are, $50.
00:10:03Is that all?
00:10:05Why, sugarpuss, if you don't believe me, ask the professor.
00:10:10I certainly will.
00:10:13How much did he give you to lie?
00:10:15Madam, on my word as a gentleman,
00:10:17I didn't receive one cent of that $100.
00:10:19Huh.
00:10:21Oh, yes, yes, the hair.
00:10:23I was saving that to buy Susan a new dress.
00:10:26Huh.
00:10:31Good evening, Mrs. Jackson.
00:10:33Good evening, Zelia.
00:10:35Good evening, Captain.
00:10:37May I have some more peppermint lemonade?
00:10:41May I have peppermint flavor on my lollipop?
00:10:44You bet you can, Zelia.
00:10:46There you are, service with a smile.
00:10:48There you are.
00:10:55Ah, to the young again.
00:11:07Who's there?
00:11:09Me.
00:11:10Who is me?
00:11:11Me is there.
00:11:13Why don't you say that in the first place?
00:11:15Come on in here.
00:11:16As I was saying, when he looked at me
00:11:18with those plush button eyes, I says to myself,
00:11:21Opal, this ain't no time to be foolish.
00:11:24But last week you told me that you married him.
00:11:26Of course I'm married him.
00:11:27Mommy!
00:11:28Oh, my goodness.
00:11:31I wasn't going to let no good man get away from me.
00:11:34Good men's are scarcest.
00:11:35Oh, I.
00:11:40I used the image of your ma when she
00:11:42was queen of the Mississippi.
00:11:44Thank you, Opal.
00:11:45Was she really beautiful?
00:11:47Child, when she stepped on the stage to sing,
00:11:50even the fish come up out to Mississippi
00:11:52to stop, look, and listen.
00:11:54And your daddy, he was the handsomest man
00:11:57I ever did see.
00:12:01My, it's getting late.
00:12:02We've got to change for the show.
00:12:04Well, I think I'll wear this tonight.
00:12:05But honey, that's your ma's wedding gown.
00:12:09Yes, I know.
00:12:10Is there any reason why I shouldn't wear it?
00:12:12Well, the old folks say.
00:12:14Yes?
00:12:15They say you're bound to meet the man you love
00:12:17the same night.
00:12:18Not in Clarksville.
00:12:20Why, Miss Cousin, you sure are pretty.
00:12:22Thank you, Zania.
00:12:23But it happened to your ma in a much smaller town.
00:12:26Well, good.
00:12:27We'll see if it works tonight.
00:12:34Give me that thing.
00:12:35You want to spoil your appetite?
00:12:37Hey!
00:12:48I, uh, I must have frightened you.
00:12:50No, but.
00:12:51My name is Anthony Sardell.
00:12:53The captain was kind enough to permit me and my companion
00:12:55to go as far as New Orleans.
00:12:57I'm traveling for my health.
00:12:59Well, I'm Captain Jackson's niece.
00:13:01Ella Bella?
00:13:02No, that's my aunt.
00:13:03You see, the boat was named after her.
00:13:05after her you must be Susan yes but how did you know my name I saw it on the poster
00:13:11and you're the only one aboard lovely enough to have such a beautiful name well I
00:13:15really must be going now mr. Sardell I hope the trip does you some good I can't
00:13:20tell you how much better I feel already and the name is Anthony I'll try to
00:13:25remember looks like it's gonna be a pleasant trip after all that's honey
00:13:31Anthony this looks like the color you always get the right color all right it
00:13:43just doesn't seem to taste the way it should I wish we could find that formula
00:13:46we ransacked this ship from stem to stern hello skipper Susan you startled me I
00:13:53thought I was seeing a ghost perhaps you'd better stop drinking pepto-vintage
00:13:56water drink it it's enough that I have to sell it oh but I remember when
00:14:01pepto-vintage water wasn't all water at one time was really a beneficial
00:14:05stimulant was widely used up and down the Mississippi yeah and you can't find
00:14:10the formula his father hid it someplace on the ship he claimed it was worth a
00:14:13million dollars we've been searching for it for the past 20 years drink that well
00:14:22you know I think if you can duplicate that in quantity you'll have the base of
00:14:26a very good paint paint only a suggestion by that you've been trying your
00:14:34experiments on him for all the years no wonder he looks like that I'm inclined to
00:14:39resent that but I'll overlook at this time he's the only one that can remember
00:14:43how it used to taste but think what it would mean to humanity if we could find
00:14:46that formula and to us we'd be rich you could get that high-priced music teacher
00:14:51and perhaps you could even realize your operatic ambitions it does sound
00:14:55wonderful but you're liable to embalm him or blow it's all up now turn that thing
00:15:01but you go there's a crowd at the dock and it's time for the show they laughed at
00:15:06Lister they ridiculed pasture and I take great pleasure in presenting to you as a
00:15:12sample of what you're going to see and hear on the inside of our theater the star
00:15:17of our wonderful stage presentation upon whom I am glad to bestow the title her
00:15:23mother made famous many years ago ladies and gentlemen Susan
00:15:27Queen of the Mississippi
00:15:38the paddle spank the muddy waters from st. Louis to New Orleans
00:15:46and on a veil of cotton your cares will be forgotten come up the gangplank and
00:15:54you'll see just what I mean the Dixie show is just a game and when you come
00:16:07aboard I'm sure that you will find that all your troubles are only bubbles a
00:16:17smile a kiss leaves troubles far behind the Dixie show is just a slowboat and as
00:16:30you drift along you'll find it's worth the bear down where the river bends you'll find the rainbow ends and the showboat will take you there
00:16:47the Dixie show is just a slowboat and as you drift along you'll find it's worth the bear down where the river bends you'll find the rainbow ends and the showboat will take you there
00:17:17Ladies and gentlemen, this is only a sample. The show starts immediately on the inside.
00:17:47Hey you, stop playing that trumpet!
00:17:59There's no dancing permitted on the streets of Clarksville. Now break it up, break it up.
00:18:17I'm sorry I broke up your show. I didn't mean to.
00:18:24Why didn't you stop when I asked you to? And those Indians?
00:18:28It isn't their fault. They play only when I play the trumpet. Honestly, I was just listening to you sing and it came over me. Just like that.
00:18:36What came over you just like that?
00:18:39My tickle.
00:18:40Your what?
00:18:41My tickle. The mood. The urge to play. And when I get it, I hear chimes.
00:18:46But I'm the only one that can hear them. I don't know what happened tonight. You see, when I get a tickle, I'm either in love or in jail.
00:18:55Well, you weren't in jail tonight. Are you in love?
00:18:58No. I guess your singing must have sent me. You did sing that song beautifully.
00:19:03That melody you were playing after I finished my song.
00:19:07I couldn't repeat it to save my life.
00:19:09You mean you don't know what you were playing?
00:19:11No. When I get a tickle, the music just comes out. And double or nothing are the same way.
00:19:17Double or nothing?
00:19:18Yes, the Indians. They adopted me two years ago. We've been together ever since.
00:19:23They are picturesque. And they look so comfortable.
00:19:26This is a pretty good jail. I'll bet the food isn't half bad.
00:19:30Food? I'm hungry. How long do you think they'll keep us here?
00:19:34Not more than ten days.
00:19:35Ten days?
00:19:36Or $25, judging from past experiences.
00:19:39Well, what are you waiting for? Why don't you bail us out?
00:19:42Lady, I said $25 each. There are four of us here. That makes 100 of George Washington's etchings.
00:19:48And I have no etchings.
00:19:50Well, if you're broke, why don't you take a job? Any band would be glad to have you.
00:19:55Why, we could use you on the alabella.
00:19:57It wouldn't work. If the tickle isn't there...
00:20:00It may work tonight.
00:20:10Will you please stop playing that trumpet?
00:20:14Oh, excuse me.
00:20:16Oh, here comes the rescue party. Let me do the talking.
00:20:21Susan, are you all right?
00:20:22Yes, Skipper, but I'm glad to see you.
00:20:24Well, what are you waiting for? Open it up. Here's her release.
00:20:33Skipper, I want you to meet the new addition to our show. Mr...
00:20:36Calhoun. Jeff Calhoun. How do you do?
00:20:38Fine. And you?
00:20:39Good.
00:20:40Susan, have you gone out of your mind? He practically ruined us.
00:20:43Well, that's because he was on the dock.
00:20:45Just imagine the crowd he could draw if he were playing on the boat.
00:20:48Susan's right. Young man, do you want a job on the showboat?
00:20:52Yes, ma'am. If you'll take the Indians, too.
00:20:54Indians?
00:20:55Huh. They don't look like much, but maybe they can be of some use.
00:21:00Them, too?
00:21:01Them, too. I'll pay the bail.
00:21:13M-E-R-C-I-B-I-E-N.
00:21:16Mersh Bean. Must be an Indian sign.
00:21:20Lieutenant, he says the alabella won't sail unless he gets his dock fee.
00:21:24We haven't got the money.
00:21:25How much is it?
00:21:26One hundred dollars.
00:21:28For one night?
00:21:29One night each year for ten years.
00:21:31And I want my money in full or I'll call the police.
00:21:34Suppose we forget about the police. Here's your money.
00:21:37Oh, thank you, sir. Thank you.
00:21:39Here.
00:21:43I'll see that you're repaid as soon as we get it, Mr. Sardell.
00:21:46Anthony.
00:21:48Skipper, are you superstitious?
00:21:51No, not exactly. Although once I broke a mirror.
00:21:55And you had seven years' bad luck?
00:21:57That would have been a picnic. I married your Aunt Alabella.
00:22:01But seriously, Skipper, I'm sure you're not superstitious.
00:22:05No, I'm not superstitious.
00:22:07But I'm sure you're not superstitious.
00:22:09I'm not superstitious.
00:22:11Well, I'm not superstitious.
00:22:13Once I broke a mirror,
00:22:15and you had seven years' bad luck?
00:22:17That would have been a picnic.
00:22:19I married your Aunt Alabella.
00:22:21But seriously, Skipper, do you think there's any truth in any of the things that Oprah says?
00:22:25What did she tell you?
00:22:27Well, she said if I wore my mother's wedding dress,
00:22:29that I'd meet the man I love tonight.
00:22:32Which one is it, Jeff or Mr. Sardell?
00:22:35Well, Anthony, I mean, Mr. Sardell is a polished gentleman.
00:22:39And Jeff, well, he's nothing but a trumpet player.
00:22:42then you think I don't think you're right about it does that for me. I'm not I'll
00:22:48never forget how beautiful your mother looked in that dress.
00:23:02Afternoon was just. Afternoon. What's the matter with you see sick.
00:23:08A. What you need is exercise and bicarbonate of soda are you
00:23:14kidding. Where have I seen that before.
00:23:23Anthony all right and. I think it's all gassed up it'll never pay off.
00:23:30The. Other.
00:23:38What is the matter with you you say well you've got the man the man I got to see
00:23:44sickness baby oh I know something that will fix him but you take
00:23:48a great big hunk of garlic chip it up fine then cover it with olive oil and salt
00:23:54and pepper and mix it with great big glass of milk and hold your nose and
00:23:59drink it quick. That's all set to go home with it. Come
00:24:06on oh hello Kevin Oh say camp what's good for see sickness or river sickness what
00:24:11you need is
00:24:12a bottle of my pepto-vinegar water that'll fix you up gentlemen my compliments.
00:24:29But.
00:24:45What
00:24:46a payoff all gassed up how did they do that I couldn't get that thing open that
00:24:52money's been accumulating for years oh. Oh come on
00:24:58Tony take me to my room. Oh stick to my pepto-vinegar water
00:25:07and
00:25:07a glass of hot salt water. That'll fix him oh brother. Tony I'm a sick monster
00:25:15oh yes stop whining. Tony I'm going to die oh you don't shut up I'll guarantee
00:25:22that for you. Oh yes please do.
00:25:29I thought we'd better come over I heard he was ill how is he well he's really
00:25:35sick oh see sickness is only metal. Metal are you kidding oh sure if you were
00:25:43suffering as much you think differently I guess you're right but I still say it's
00:25:47only in his mind well mental or not he is sick and I think it's very kind of you
00:25:52to worry about him as you do thank you very much oh perhaps we'd better go give
00:25:57you a chance to get him undressed make him more comfortable if you need anything
00:26:01please call me thank you very much. Nurse made to
00:26:07a guy who gets seasick on the river. Some of this I don't want any of this stuff
00:26:12it's only a little water with peppermint flavoring it will help settle your
00:26:15stomach all right.
00:26:16Oh. Hey Tony
00:26:24I don't start out again hey this stuff isn't isn't what. The captain calls this
00:26:30Pepto vintage water but I call it a B.
00:26:32And C.
00:26:32Sick must have affected your head hey this is the McCoy I feel wonderful it tastes
00:26:38that certainly smells like it tastes like it but I must be ninety proof but I don't
00:26:45understand it we saw those hands bottling it from the faucet but this may be the
00:26:49captain's private bottle we'll make sure.
00:26:56Anyone comes in you're still sick remember. Oh. Where is everybody.
00:27:06There was
00:27:07a captain in the in the bar. Oh well that's just fine when I hear something for you
00:27:12right along. You're welcome. The rest of this stuff is like this I'm going to be
00:27:19a healthy guy. Smells the same.
00:27:26It is the same whiskey and good I can't understand it I saw them bottling the
00:27:32stuff from that faucet there the faucet must be connected to the water tank let's
00:27:37have
00:27:37a look. Now you mean the whole boat's loaded with stuff.
00:27:53And the captain sound is for
00:27:54a buck a copy he must be nuts or he doesn't know what he's got on board he does
00:27:58the meter see how much they got of this stuff. Ten thousand gallons
00:28:04Tony we're rich we don't own it yet what do you mean we don't want to listen we
00:28:08doesn't always have to be
00:28:09a rough hustle with you don't you know I don't know nothing except that there's
00:28:12ten thousand gallons of bourbon on this guy. You remember Harry Lewis he started
00:28:18to give me orders I didn't mean it like that honestly that's better but you know
00:28:22this is the greatest thing that ever happened to me since I got sprung up in the
00:28:24state and let's get out to see the captain. For me. I wouldn't use
00:28:31that captain last time it almost caused
00:28:33a fire all nonsense professor the true scientist disregards danger in his
00:28:37endeavor to find the truth and we do less we I'm just
00:28:41a guinea pig I'm fed up drinking these concoctions that's not the proper
00:28:45scientific spirit professor you someday you may be
00:28:48a mortal you're only a mortal after you're dead well the authorities to change that
00:28:52now all we have to do is to put this in that you know last time that caused
00:28:56a fire don't be silly watch.
00:29:01The. Well I. I don't understand
00:29:08when I conceived this theory my dream last night it worked perfectly but you don't
00:29:13have to drink that one well let's get on with the next one.
00:29:23And. Let's see what we haven't tried oh yes what I have
00:29:29no vintage water right out of the box but we've been selling the customers it's
00:29:33the only one we haven't tried in combination with the other things it takes that
00:29:37well at least it won't blow up. I think that's
00:29:44it quick mix another taste like it used to in the old days I knew it I knew it.
00:29:50And. I think that.
00:30:01Captain Jackson may I be the first to congratulate you on the rediscovery of
00:30:05pepto
00:30:05a vintage water that's funny I didn't use half the things I've been using we finally
00:30:11discovered the use for what yes and there's plenty of. Every thought of looking for
00:30:18you down here Captain by the laboratory and doing much research not anymore we
00:30:22finally I'm sorry Mr Sardell but we can't tell anyone about it just yet of course
00:30:27we really came down to talk a little business with you business what business we
00:30:30want to buy this to buy this boat yes I'd like to purchase the Alabama and I
00:30:35prepared to offer a price a ten thousand dollars cash but she isn't worth five why
00:30:41well the trip so far has been very beneficial I thought it would be nice to use
00:30:45the boat as
00:30:46a river yacht I'm sorry Mr Sardell your offer is more than I can ask but the
00:30:51Alabama is not for sale any reason Captain I don't care to disclose my reason
00:30:58well then I guess there'll be no sale well there go our dreams of
00:31:02a pleasure yacht well thank you just the same captain I'll leave you to your
00:31:05experiments why didn't you sell it ten thousand that's a lot of money this is
00:31:13worth a million he said catch.
00:31:22I think they make the stuff down there but I didn't see any still the whole layout
00:31:25is probably
00:31:26a cover up for the real thing. All right Sam you can get yourself
00:31:33a now I'll take over thanks Miss Susan. Here you are pilot Jeff you can steer away
00:31:39to your heart's content Oh well don't you think you better show me how it's done
00:31:43all right but the Alabama's been up and down the Mississippi so many times you
00:31:46practically knows the way but the trumpet down. Now put your hands on the wheel
00:31:53next to mine. She may drift a little with
00:31:59a side current see them out there. Now all you need to do is turn the wheel
00:32:06slightly. And that compensates for the drift. And then that brings
00:32:13a right back again. Back to normal. Understand.
00:32:21You turn the side currents slightly and that compensates for the Alabama's drift.
00:32:29The wheels. See there are a lot of little wheels going around in my head.
00:32:37I. Know I'll come but so. I'm
00:32:43strange as it seems. I'm.
00:32:50In the heart. So you'll see I must be.
00:32:58A dreamer on a screen.
00:33:02I'll hold you. In my arms.
00:33:20It's keep on.
00:33:22Dreaming. And if it's real.
00:33:30Don't break the spell.
00:33:37Can be. A dream or reality.
00:33:45When you're in my arms.
00:33:50That's.
00:33:56The way.
00:34:04I'll see you.
00:34:09In a very strong.
00:34:19I'm.
00:34:35I'm sure.
00:34:50I'm.
00:34:58What happened you you trumpet player I'm sorry Susan I was looking at you and it
00:35:04came over me again just like that I suppose yeah I don't know why I wasn't in
00:35:09jail. Susan. I'm in love. And if you're trying to learn to cook it should make
00:35:16an ideal marriage but I'm in love with you Susan I throw this one in the river if
00:35:20you wish. You can play your trumpet as much as you like it's all right with me
00:35:27don't you think you want to kiss me first. Wait but the trumpet down and don't
00:35:33reach for it again no matter how you feel I want to. Sure positive.
00:35:46I.
00:36:16Gentleman don't send out all right.
00:36:34Thank you. You know I'd rather jump go and eat no I didn't know that but I know
00:36:39that you better juggle or you won't eat all I'm going to mother that's better than
00:36:44bringing the old battle acts on here.
00:36:52Be. Sad but true.
00:37:08Thank you very much. I don't see why I shouldn't I love you
00:37:14three days already. I should have thanked that act in
00:37:19a month was twenty years ago and put him in
00:37:21a museum. And they call me.
00:37:34Girls.
00:37:51What do you think you are home no if we were home you wouldn't talk back.
00:38:14To.
00:38:36And now ladies and gentlemen I take great pleasure in presenting to you one of our
00:38:39feature attractions brought to you at
00:38:41a great expense event singing no no no that's it.
00:38:52No. No. No.
00:38:59One team my mind said no no my.
00:39:03Lord. No no no no no no I
00:39:10didn't. Think I was the only show.
00:39:20I like me I thought you were mine I said. Now I.
00:39:28Keep your opinions to yourself try to be
00:39:30a gentleman. But all I was getting.
00:39:40He yes yes yes baby it's hard to one.
00:39:48That I still love you. My heart says.
00:39:53But I.
00:39:56Mean I thought you were mine I said.
00:40:02I thought I was getting.
00:40:08But all I was getting.
00:40:10Was. He.
00:40:16He yes yes yes baby it's hard to go.
00:40:24That I still love you. My heart says.
00:40:32But no. No no.
00:40:40No.
00:40:50Gentlemen before I present our next stellar attraction I would like to introduce
00:40:54another star not of the state not of the radio but rather a star in its own right
00:41:01a star of the medical world ladies and gentlemen go vintage water I know that many
00:41:07of you may have purchased pepto vintage water in the past and said that it didn't
00:41:10do you any good but ladies and gentlemen that is
00:41:13a thing of the past for only tonight after twenty years research can pepto vintage
00:41:19water truly be called the modern miracle medicine as
00:41:23a special introductory offer I am going to give away this handy little corkscrew
00:41:27and potato peeler with every bottle of pepto vintage water now who will be the
00:41:32first to buy this mix of life I will step right up on the stage.
00:41:41Now I good woman what I do I'm sure the audience would like to hear well lately
00:41:47I've been suffering from
00:41:48a sour stomach I have spots in front of my eyes that's before I and sometimes
00:41:55I feel so weak I can hardly speak above
00:41:58a whisper have you ever used pepto vintage water before it is the only thing that
00:42:04has ever helped me thank you madam for your unsolicited endorsement you are as
00:42:09your handy little potato peeler and corkscrew thank you.
00:42:21It's better than.
00:42:22That. Who's next I'll take one of them there.
00:42:36Now what's the matter with you that cold settled all through here I am
00:42:40a friend and here's your handy little corkscrew and potato peeler thanks I hate
00:42:45potatoes. And now who's next who will be the next to buy
00:42:50a bottle of this healer of all the elves step right up folks and have you know it's
00:42:53ready the boys will hand out the medicine thank you thank you sir and thank you I
00:42:59can't believe my eyes. He's really selling that stuff for
00:43:02a buck a copy that still must be turning up with
00:43:04a barrel and it is sort of peculiar thank you sir thank you and I thank you something
00:43:11bigger behind all this and Tony I mean Anthony what are we waiting for. Every time
00:43:16he sells a bottle of stuff five bucks goes out the window and you saw something
00:43:21yet yes I have curly occasionally
00:43:23a situation calls for drastic action and this is one of them. No more with
00:43:29the politeness and there's no more politeness Tony.
00:43:46Oh. I could sing to that but with
00:43:53a trumpet it's got to be there. I'm sorry
00:44:00Professor it just won't work but I appreciate you're trying to help me oh that's
00:44:04a shame your music side of this world too bad you can play only on inspiration maybe
00:44:10if you kept after it you might be able to get what I wish I could I take
00:44:14a steady job with some band and well. Yeah well why don't you put your music down
00:44:20on paper it's
00:44:21a better to publish it I should award your handsomely I can't I don't know one note
00:44:25from another can't read music and unbelievable remarkable even annoying well.
00:44:33I could do it for you you would but I don't know when I'll be in the mood again
00:44:37well I can hear you playing no matter where you are on the boat next time I hear
00:44:41you play I'll set the music down on paper oh that's awfully nice of you thanks for
00:44:44it so I don't know Professor.
00:45:41You know you
00:45:55are very talented Mr Jeff thank you Missy that you're singing is the.
00:46:02The prime is hardly the word for it oh you see the nicest thing Jeff. But not
00:46:08too early you would appreciate
00:46:10a fellow at least most more than those who do not know nothing of the final point
00:46:15well really I oh please now tell me would you like to accompany me when I see you
00:46:20well I don't I think it's what I don't understand very well I you feel even though
00:46:26I am just that you know I'm willing to share equal billing with you you know Jeff
00:46:32I like you oh you do you know we suck and most of them. Is that French you're
00:46:38speaking that we don't you know that French is the language of law. Well you'll
00:46:45have to excuse me Mr that I don't speak French.
00:46:54Prosperity come at last this Alabama just be
00:46:57a week's salary first one in three months going to buy a red hat and gloves maybe
00:47:02a bag too there's
00:47:03a gentleman down in Evansville. Oprah were any of your gentleman friends
00:47:11musicians. That's
00:47:15a silly question musicians ain't gentlemen that is then I come in contact with
00:47:22that's why these musicians. But Casper did play
00:47:25a trumpet. That is solid do. A trumpet.
00:47:33Well what he thought of well you know fickle. All trumpet
00:47:41players is fickle they seem to get something in their blood sort of like
00:47:45Mr jive and heckle combination make you love one minute and hate on the next well I
00:47:51just can't believe Mr Calhoun is that way he play a trumpet don't. Yes can you
00:47:57change the stripes on
00:47:59a wolf I mean a tiger. Come
00:48:07out of here what you do and dressed up like that who do you think you is.
00:48:14You take this off and come on out of here oh let alone open she's cute all right
00:48:21Susan if you want to mess with.
00:48:30You.
00:48:44And.
00:48:51I.
00:48:58Still feel. Big.
00:49:05Blown.
00:49:12Just to make you.
00:49:18Change.
00:49:21Like a man.
00:49:26Like a man.
00:49:31And.
00:49:34Thank you so much.
00:49:38My but you're so bad and see.
00:49:41That.
00:49:43I'm playing in those high heels shoes and maybe in the stress that you trade that
00:49:50get up to sit on my knees and.
00:49:59Big.
00:50:04Big.
00:50:05No.
00:50:14You're not fooling me big.
00:50:19My but you're so fancy.
00:50:24Stumbling in those high heels shoes.
00:50:27A lady in distress. Bet you trade that get up to sit on
00:50:35a man is me and he can't.
00:50:40Let.
00:50:46Talk and all that big.
00:50:52With that big wall.
00:50:57And. You know.
00:51:07There you go.
00:51:27You. Oh hello Tony nice to see you again this is
00:51:35a welcome surprise lately I thought you'd been avoiding me Oh nonsense Tony you
00:51:41don't mind if I call you Tony do it would be
00:51:43a pleasure since you know you're the kind of girl who could make
00:51:47a man change his mind about a lot of things I'm sorry I didn't hear what you were
00:51:52saying. Let's go someplace where we can talk.
00:52:07Now that we're alone Susan I.
00:52:17You were saying I'm sure we could be very happy to get.
00:52:22A look at the. You up yet no no I don't want to be
00:52:29cheered up on that and I'm
00:52:30a little. Of course you're in life with me would be very different.
00:52:38Oh now I think I am.
00:52:43Musicians.
00:52:43Are temperamental. Tony how thrilling you're
00:52:50really proposing to me. Of course.
00:52:57Oh she's not in the system they make
00:52:59a handsome couple yes no no I'm going to get back to that but anyone can see that
00:53:04they are suited for each other yes no. What do you say. Tony I'm not in love with
00:53:10you. But anyway.
00:53:27He must be in love with her otherwise he couldn't play.
00:53:30Who's in love with whom he is.
00:53:40What's the matter with you so then doesn't she understand you yes no yes no.
00:53:48The long eared owl is
00:53:49an industrious mouser and molest comparatively few birds seven years ago we
00:53:54examined
00:53:54a hundred and seven stomachs of this owl of which fifteen were empty and imagine
00:53:59that.
00:54:08Of the ninety two remaining eighty six or over ninety three percent contained the
00:54:13remains of small mammals imagine that.
00:54:24The. Pencil paper.
00:54:34Finest music in the world going up in thin air no pencil no paper thank you.
00:54:54Thank. You.
00:55:05For.
00:55:24The.
00:55:44Now ladies and gentlemen I wish to present the stars of our show Susan Queen of the
00:55:49Mississippi and Jeffrey the king of the top.
00:55:54Of. You've got to play we've
00:56:01advertised in the customer I'm sorry Captain Jackson but I just can't seem to get
00:56:04into the mood. She won't speak to me. Susan
00:56:11Jeff says you can't get in the mood and I was thinking you're talking to the wrong
00:56:15girl get event event nonsense isn't it shouldn't I won't even talk to me Susan
00:56:21playing you or. We don't get him back in the mood tonight he'll never Susan we lose
00:56:26our biggest.
00:56:38A dream.
00:56:43Keep on.
00:56:44Me. And if it's real.
00:56:52Don't break the spell.
00:56:58Can be. A dream or reality.
00:57:06When you are in my.
00:57:08Eyes.
00:57:15I'm.
00:57:26See your face.
00:57:29In every.
00:57:38Room.
00:57:48I'll still have.
00:58:08To.
00:58:18The don't stand there with your mouth open go after all ladies and gentlemen or I
00:58:22present our next stellar attraction I would like to introduce another star not to
00:58:26the state the way you plan and I can't miss it is about five G's case in the
00:58:32captain's damper but kind of
00:58:33a safe business I sneeze hard enough to pull apart all right we'll pick it up but
00:58:37don't let that check and feed sidetrack you the big thing is the boat you got
00:58:40everything straight sure it'll be
00:58:42a cinch the first thing we do is we go ashore and for New Orleans for a new dock
00:58:46reservation then we come back and take care of the characters then we get Sam to
00:58:50steer this barge into our dock space and we take care of Sam. Boyfriend you picked
00:58:56yourself he's not my boyfriend and they can't do this it's piracy or mutiny or
00:59:00something whatever it is they're going to do it let's get the others no they're
00:59:05probably aren't I have it when they go ashore to make the call you go with them
00:59:09install for time I'll follow and get the police that way no one on board will get
00:59:13hurt all right and I'll get your girlfriend to go with me girlfriend yes if it.
00:59:25I don't tell me those who were you going ashore yes we were just going to have
00:59:29a bite of food we were too well then let's make it a force of yes no make up your
00:59:34mind you don't mind do you tell me why on the contrary it's
00:59:38an unexpected pleasure.
00:59:59I'm rather glad for this opportunity to get better acquainted before we part
01:00:02tomorrow night yes it has been a lot of fun you quite recovered your health not
01:00:06entirely but he'll be well. Curly I think you better telephone the audience and
01:00:11make our hotel reservation right. No baby I'll be no.
01:01:32Thank you. Thank you.
01:01:48Funny there's no police around well we'll wait
01:01:50a few minutes more if one doesn't show up we'll break this window someone's bound
01:01:54to call for the police then.
01:01:55It. Looks like they're getting ready to leave we can't wait any longer OK
01:02:03boys let's break the window out of the way but. I want to make it.
01:02:10All anarchists put them bricks down
01:02:13a policeman a policeman and you're under arrest for your arrest in
01:02:17a wrong criminals there are two or their criminals to all right move on slow.
01:02:23Thank you. Oh must you leave so soon yes we play in New Orleans our biggest day
01:02:28tomorrow night we need the rest. We'll see you later.
01:02:33We'll see you later.
01:02:41You like him don't you well of course I do I told him so. Did he say oh he's
01:02:47a shaman he told me that by seeing the vine and then and then.
01:02:55That's just trumpet I wonder why he's playing. You're here and I'm not saying
01:03:01if it is in jail what they did.
01:03:10Get me up at this time of the night you can arrest people just because they say
01:03:15things you got to have evidence evidence that will stick. To play on the Indians
01:03:20lose. But Sarge and I guess it's criminal this is embarrassing
01:03:27Sarge I saw these now look at this this is something yes I want to Tony Sardell
01:03:34alias the Duke Jack Berger alias Curly sometimes known as flat nose believed
01:03:40headed for New Orleans ten thousand dollars reward guaranteed notify Sheriff
01:03:45Colby County now arrest them and you're doing something I'll try Sarge.
01:03:54You can't hold him he's innocent OK Lady nobody's disputing your word they're free
01:03:58to go thanks for everything. And if we capture them with
01:04:05a ten thousand dollars reward but do you think we can do it I'm so sorry I'm afraid
01:04:09I'll have to interfere with your plan yeah we aim to do a little collecting
01:04:12ourselves to take him below and lock him up and then get the others all right you
01:04:15guys keep your hands out of the blanket. Oh you you could scratch your eyes I've
01:04:22had bigger and better things try
01:04:23a sister and I still got my eyes you see that's that walk. After you please.
01:04:30So you are going to collect
01:04:36a reward my hero I'm positive I'll get it out of here every time you're sure of
01:04:41something it always goes wrong first you were positive you were going to kiss me
01:04:45then you were positive you're going to capture Tony and Curly well I hope you're
01:04:49positive of the vet what's the vet got to do with it I don't understand oh so you're
01:04:53not positive of her either but she told you she liked you didn't she yeah and you
01:04:59told her she sang divinely didn't you well I and then you and then I want well
01:05:05she didn't finish and we heard your trumpet heard the trumpet that's it you're not
01:05:11going to play that thing now why you you're just
01:05:15a trumpet player.
01:05:29A. Pencil paper.
01:05:36Pencil paper.
01:05:38Pencil.
01:05:57So that you I'll hang you to the highest yard on this dramatic any guy still play
01:06:03in the trumpet and then blow his head off we got everybody but the professor all
01:06:08right let's get the maestro and don't you show your face on deck or I'll blow your
01:06:11head off. They can't treat me like this.
01:06:18You want to shoot me.
01:06:33Are you how romantic. Locked in each other's arms perfect.
01:06:38Perfect. How do you lock yourself in Tony and Curly did they probably locked up the
01:06:46others too but why I'll explain later.
01:06:54That's what we'll have to do the maestro well all we need is
01:06:57a piano we could have
01:06:58a musical soiree I'd rather you wouldn't move Curly has nervous fingers.
01:07:02But.
01:07:08Tony help. They're going to scalp me.
01:07:21Oh you should wait you'll be easy that don't mind me go right ahead pick up from
01:07:28and then and then what that's what I'd like to know and then.
01:07:35And then you get up and walk the way just like that.
01:07:42I speak to work some OK Katie take care of those mugs I don't know they were aboard we
01:07:46didn't until he told us I was nothing we came aboard to check on a call to New Orleans
01:07:52for dock reservations New Orleans Navy Yard maybe. I broke my heart
01:07:59ten thousand dollars rewarded by a lot of on some. OK I know I told me Anthony what
01:08:05difference does it make so soon be
01:08:07a number. That you're doing this like this I just shamed of yourself.
01:08:15This is shocking. Thank you. Please forgive me Jeff I was jealous.
01:08:22You mean.
01:08:38Susan.