Dusty's Trail E24: John J Callahan
22min | Comedy, Western | TV Series (1973– )
A stage and a wagon heading west get separated from the rest of the wagon train thanks to Dusty. Now they must make their way to California.
Creators: Elroy Schwartz, Sherwood Schwartz
Stars: Bob Denver, Forrest Tucker, Ivor Francis
22min | Comedy, Western | TV Series (1973– )
A stage and a wagon heading west get separated from the rest of the wagon train thanks to Dusty. Now they must make their way to California.
Creators: Elroy Schwartz, Sherwood Schwartz
Stars: Bob Denver, Forrest Tucker, Ivor Francis
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Let's follow the path of Dusty's Trail. Oh, Dusty's Trail, Dusty's Trail.
00:08A stage and a wagon a-headin' west. Part of a wagon train lost from the rest.
00:16Dusty's the reason for their plight. Thanks to Dusty, nothin's right.
00:24Only the wagon master's hand keeps them a-rollin' to the promised land.
00:32Oh, the goin' gets mighty rough, but they don't seem to mind.
00:38It's California, eh, that's the place they must find.
00:44Deserts and rocks are in their way, but they won't stop, come what may.
00:51Mountains and hills that they must scale, but they know they'll make it,
00:56cause they just can't fail on Dusty's Trail.
01:21I told you there was a town over the next hill.
01:28Yeah, amazin' the way these little towns springin' up everywhere.
01:31This place must have a population of a hundred.
01:35Hmm, what's that over there?
01:38Win five hundred dollars, wow.
01:42That's right, folks, five hundred dollars to any man.
01:46Yeah, I'm thinkin' the same thing.
01:48Let's go see what that's all about, huh? Come on.
01:52Boy, I sure could use some nice, cool water.
01:56Five hundred dollars for any man.
02:03Well, you said you wanted some nice, cool water.
02:07Yeah, I meant on the inside, not on the outside.
02:10Come on.
02:12Come on.
02:15All right.
02:20That's right, folks, five hundred dollars to any man who can last five minutes.
02:26That's just three hundred seconds with the world famous pugilist, Butcher Dan.
02:31He sure looks tough.
02:33Oh, I don't know, I've seen tougher.
02:35Come on, come on, there must be somebody out there with a little backbone.
02:40Unless you're all a bunch of low-down, no-good, yellow-bellied potlickers.
02:45Sure got me big.
02:47Five hundred bucks a room, you know what that would buy me?
02:50Yeah, a nice funeral.
02:51No, no, that pretty spread in California I was tellin' you about.
02:54Five hundred dollars, buy that whole thing.
02:56All right, all right, now, who wants to get rich fast?
03:00I do.
03:01Now, that's more like it.
03:02No.
03:03Well, thank you, sir.
03:04Step right this way.
03:06Mr. Callaghan, don't do it, don't do it.
03:08Hey, I really want that ranch.
03:10I'm going to be the one getting in the ring, not you.
03:12Stop that shivering and shaking.
03:13I can't.
03:14Why not?
03:15Because my pants are wet and I'm freezing.
03:18Now, that's more like it.
03:34Mr. Callaghan did it.
03:35Yeah, the biggest, the meanest, under the five hundred dollar sign.
03:39And shoulders out to here, three hundred pounds, black tights, five minutes.
03:42I tried to stop him, but I couldn't.
03:44You know, Callaghan's ranch, you know, Butcher Dan.
03:47In other words, Callaghan has agreed to fight a professional boxer, Butcher Dan,
03:50in order to win the prize money to buy the ranch in California.
03:53That's what I just said, wasn't it?
03:55Sounds to me like Cal could really get himself hurt.
03:58What can we do?
04:00Nothing.
04:01You're not going to do nothing except listen up.
04:03I heard what Dusty just told you and I appreciate your concern,
04:06but I got something here I want to show you.
04:09Oh, medals.
04:11I never mentioned all this before because I didn't see any reason,
04:14but, well, you're looking at the former United States heavyweight boxing champion
04:19of the whole United States Cavalry from 1835 to 1840.
04:22Hey, listen to this newspaper clipping.
04:24Today, Sergeant Thomas Callaghan rendered his opponent unconscious
04:28before the contest had hardly begun.
04:31Forty-three victories, 38 by knockout.
04:36Well, well, that's a very impressive record, Mr. Callaghan.
04:40I'll say. Gee.
04:43And you believe, Mr. Callaghan,
04:45that the odds of your beating this Butcher Dan are in your favor?
04:48It's like taking candy away from a baby, Mr. Brookhaven.
04:51I know one thing.
04:52I can build you a suitable training camp right over here.
04:55Good.
04:56I'll make you a beautiful robe to wear in the ring.
04:58Thank you, Betsy.
04:59And I'll be your sparring partner.
05:03Victor, will you stop that before you sprain an ankle?
05:07May I assume that I could make a small wager on the outcome?
05:11Sure.
05:12You can ride into town with me now if you want to.
05:14I've still got a few details I have to iron out.
05:16Just a few thousand dollars, soldier.
05:18You understand.
05:19Just to keep in the interest.
05:21Well, in that case, I guess I better go along, too.
05:24What for?
05:25Well, to keep all that money in a safe place.
05:38Mmm.
05:40Smoke and booze and cowboys.
05:44What a beautiful smell.
05:46Sit over there.
05:47You sure?
05:48How can you tell?
05:50I told you, you chicken brain baboon,
05:53when you bring Butcher Dan a drink,
05:55you bring it in a water glass.
06:00That's them all right.
06:02My, he's a big one.
06:05Mr. Callahan, are you sure you'll emerge victorious?
06:09Don't worry about a thing.
06:1038 knockouts is not exactly chopped buffalo meat.
06:14Lulu and I will circulate.
06:16You make your arrangements.
06:18We certainly will.
06:21Go on, Betsy.
06:24Well, well, well.
06:25I think the big bad challenger and his little pipsqueak friend.
06:29I don't think I'd talk like that if I were you.
06:31I don't think I'd talk like that if I were you.
06:33Why not?
06:34Why not?
06:35I'm going to make him eat those words.
06:37Because he's going to make you eat those words.
06:39Does that mean the fight's on?
06:41You just tell me where and when.
06:43Saturday afternoon, 3 o'clock, right here.
06:45And the $500, if I go the full five minutes.
06:49Right here.
06:50Not that we're going to need it.
06:52Oh, honey, I'll hold that.
06:54Just in case you might be wrong.
06:56Are you kidding?
06:58Me lose the fight, you'll be begging him to stop it.
07:01Who's going to be begging him to stop it?
07:03You'll be begging him to stop it.
07:04I'll be begging him to stop it.
07:05I'm begging you to stop it.
07:06All right, then.
07:07All right, all right.
07:08Break it up.
07:09Save it for Saturday when we're selling tickets.
07:14Mr. Callaghan, you simply must stand still.
07:17Yes, Miss Brookhaven.
07:18You want to look nice for the fight, don't you?
07:20Yeah, but not so nice that some cowboy's going to propose to me.
07:23Hi, Mrs. Brookhaven.
07:24Howdy, madam.
07:25Hi, Betsy.
07:26You see what I mean?
07:28Shh.
07:29It'll just be another moment.
07:31Oh, yes.
07:33Lilac and red.
07:34Oh, yes.
07:35Oh, yes.
07:36Oh, yes.
07:37Oh, yes.
07:38Oh, yes.
07:39Oh, yes.
07:40Oh, yes.
07:41Oh, yes.
07:42Oh, yes.
07:43Lilac organdy is just perfect for the robe.
07:46Not lilac.
07:47Green.
07:48Why green?
07:49Callaghan.
07:50It's an Irish name.
07:51Oh, very well.
07:52If you must have ethnic identification.
07:54Blue will look great for a pair of tights.
07:57Blue.
07:58Oh, splendid.
07:59It'll match his eyes perfectly.
08:01At least before the fight starts.
08:08Well, I'll drink.
08:12Did the best I could.
08:13Oh, this is great.
08:14Boy, set up like this, I'll be in the best shape of my life come Saturday.
08:18I hope so, for the sake of your honor and my money.
08:21Hey, you just in time to see Mr. Callaghan start training.
08:25Yeah, this is great.
08:26Just one thing missing.
08:27What's that?
08:28Sparring partner.
08:31Here I am.
08:32I'm all set.
08:37I'm going to be your sparring partner.
08:38I've heard of David and Goliath, but this is ridiculous.
08:41I can't spar with you, Dusty.
08:43I don't want to hurt you.
08:44Don't worry about it.
08:45I've been doing a lot of practicing.
08:54Used to call me the blonde bomber.
08:56You fought a lot?
08:57Till my mother cut my hair.
08:59Are you sure you can take a punch, Dusty?
09:01I'm a lot tougher than you think.
09:03I have a pipe cleaner with a better physique.
09:08Well, if you're sure you can take a punch,
09:11I sure don't want to hurt you, little pal.
09:13Will you stop worrying about it, huh?
09:15Let's just shake hands and come out fighting.
09:17All right.
09:18Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.
09:20Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.
09:21Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.
09:39I still don't see why we have to go chasing off into the boondocks.
09:42I told you.
09:43Now, something tells me we better check that Callahan guy out.
09:46What for?
09:47He ain't no fighter.
09:48He's just like all the rest of them suckers.
09:49I don't know.
09:50There's just something about him.
09:51He's just a little too cocksure of himself.
09:5797, 98, 99.
10:06And 100.
10:11Stop.
10:12That looks like fun.
10:13Yeah, that's some fun.
10:15Do you mind if I try it?
10:16Those rocks are pretty heavy, Dusty.
10:18Are you kidding?
10:19Those two little rocks?
10:28Remember, Callahan, you got to work on your combination punches.
10:30Right.
10:31No, no.
10:32First a left and then a right.
10:35I meant right like in okay.
10:37Why don't you say okay?
10:40Look, will you get everybody out of here, especially Dusty?
10:42Right.
10:43We've got a lot of training to do.
10:44You sure this thing is rigged right?
10:46Oh, I'm sure.
10:47I'll say.
10:48I mean, look at this, huh?
10:54I told you we'd be wasting our time.
10:56They ain't nothing but a bunch of jokers.
10:58Hold on.
10:59I just want to make sure.
11:04Come on, Callahan, we'll hold the bag for you.
11:05Yeah.
11:06Come on, hit it real hard.
11:07Make believe I'm the enemy.
11:08Oh, little pal, you're my friend.
11:10Well, make believe I'm Butcher Dan.
11:12You're about half his size.
11:14Oh, okay.
11:15How about this?
11:18Callahan's a sissy.
11:19Callahan's a sissy.
11:20Very good, Dusty.
11:21Very good.
11:25Why, you little...
11:29For a sissy, you're pretty terrific.
11:32Still dying from laughing?
11:35You were right.
11:36This guy Callahan sure packs a mean wallop.
11:39Which means we better not take a chance on losing that $500.
11:46You thinking what I'm thinking?
11:48Yeah.
11:50We agreed to a fight, but nobody said anything about it having to be fair and square.
12:02Well, Andy, today's the big day.
12:04Yeah, it sure is.
12:05Where's Mr. Callahan?
12:06In the wagon, putting on his costume decombo.
12:09Are you ready, Callahan?
12:11Okay, everybody, here he is.
12:13Ta-da!
12:15Turn around.
12:19Oh, my lovely, my dear, lovely Betsy.
12:23Dear, the sash should be in a contrasting color.
12:26It should be gold to match the lettering.
12:29Carter, I'll be right back.
12:31Here.
12:57Well, Mrs. Brookhaven sure ought to be back by now, huh?
13:00Well, she knows the fight starts in less than an hour.
13:02Well, if I know Mrs. Brookhaven, she's trying to pick the appropriate sash for that robe.
13:07She studied color coordination in Paris, you know.
13:10Maybe she went all the way over there to get the sash.
13:16Mr. Callahan! Mr. Callahan!
13:17What is it, Betsy?
13:18I found this note pinned to the stagecoach seat.
13:20How about that? That's the first I ever got since we left St. Louis.
13:24If you ever want to see Mrs. Brookhaven again, make sure Callahan loses the fight today.
13:30Good heavens!
13:32Well, no getting around it, folks. This is terrible news.
13:36Terrible.
13:40Well, here we are. Your new home for a little while.
13:46Please, you're smudging my sleeve.
13:49Now, look, sweetheart.
13:50I beg your pardon.
13:52If you find it necessary to communicate with me, my name is Mrs. Brookhaven.
13:57Or Lady Brookhaven. Whichever you prefer.
14:00Sit down and shut up.
14:02What did you say?
14:03I said sit down.
14:05Sit here?
14:08Ridiculous. It's dirty.
14:10I got news for you.
14:11You'll be under six feet of dirt if your wagon master friend doesn't lose that fight today.
14:15Now, sit down.
14:16My good man, I will not have you speak to me in that tone.
14:20And remove your hat in the presence of a lady.
14:24Honestly, the way some people bring up their children.
14:28Tie her up and gag her.
14:30I warn you, sir.
14:32If you don't release me this instant, you'll never do business at my husband's bank.
14:37Oh, my poor, dear, sweet Daphne.
14:40Gone.
14:41Don't you worry, Mr. Brookhaven. We'll get her back.
14:43Well, I think I know who did it, too.
14:45So do I.
14:46So do I.
14:47So do I.
14:48Who?
14:49I don't know. I just want to be left out of the group.
14:51Butcher Dan and his manager, that's who.
14:54Yeah, but we haven't got time to prove that.
14:56Those ruffians, they'll stop at nothing.
14:58Well, there's only one thing to do to get you out of here.
15:00What?
15:01Get you out of here.
15:03Those ruffians, they'll stop at nothing.
15:05Well, there's only one thing to do to get your wife back, Mr. Brookhaven.
15:09I'm going to have to lose this fight.
15:12Oh, thank you, Mr. Callaghan.
15:15Compared to my wife, money is nothing.
15:20And may the United States Treasury have mercy upon my soul.
15:33It's all yours.
15:39Look at that crowd.
15:41Ah, we took in $300 already.
15:43It's all ours if Callaghan's as smart as I think he is.
16:02I'm sure you know how much I appreciate what you're doing, Mr. Callahan, taking the first
16:25loss of your career for my poor dear Daphne.
16:28How about yourself?
16:29You're starting to lose a pretty good piece of money.
16:31It's my first loss, too.
16:32Mr. Callahan.
16:33Mr. Callahan.
16:34Any news?
16:35I got the sheriff combing the town, but there's no sign of Mrs. Brocade.
16:42Well, here goes nothing.
16:45Mr. Alex.
16:48Trustee, will you just go get me some water or something?
16:52Yes.
17:01Ladies and gentlemen.
17:04Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention, please.
17:08Introducing, in this corner, at 230 pounds, the champion pugilist of the entire Oklahoma
17:17territory, Butcher Dan.
17:23And in this corner, at 220 pounds, the challenger,
17:31Kid Callahan.
17:36Hey, what are we cheering about?
17:39Oh, poor Mr. Callahan.
17:41All right, men.
17:44Okay, men, you know the rules.
17:46When you hear the bell, you come out fighting.
17:49Aren't you ashamed to be hiding behind a woman's skirts?
17:53What are you talking about?
17:54We know that you're holding Miss Brocade hostage.
17:58Well, suppose you try and prove it.
18:01Fill her up.
18:03With water.
18:04It's for Kid Callahan.
18:20Listen, you should just take it easy out there.
18:22Just do what you have to do without getting hurt, okay?
18:24Don't worry.
18:25Callahan ain't gonna try nothing as long as we got that dizzy rich dame tucked away.
18:29Right.
18:31Huh?
18:34Oh.
18:36What are you doing in our corner?
18:38She's got a good man there, you know.
18:42Mr. Callahan, Mr. Callahan.
18:43You got the water?
18:44I got more than that.
18:45You were right the way you were figuring.
18:46Butcher Dan's got Mrs. Brocade and the whole prison.
18:48Where?
18:49I don't know.
18:50Go back and find out.
18:51Quickly, while there's still time.
18:53Right.
18:56Take it easy the first round, Butcher.
18:58Make it look good.
19:01Take it easy the second round, too, Butcher.
19:03By the way, I keep forgetting where that rich old lady is.
19:09I told you to get out of here.
19:17There goes Mr. Callahan's ranch.
19:19And maybe his face, too.
19:22Mr. Callahan.
19:23Mr. Callahan.
19:24What?
19:25I can't find out where she is.
19:27Callahan, duck!
19:31Oh!
19:38Oh, I'm sorry, you guys.
19:40Mrs. Brookhaven.
19:43You're missing a great fight out there.
19:47Mrs. Brookhaven?
19:49Don't go away now.
19:50Mr. Callahan.
19:51Mr. Callahan, look in there.
19:52Look in there.
19:53Look.
19:58One.
20:00Two.
20:01Mr. Callahan, get up.
20:02Get up.
20:03Three.
20:05It's no use, Dusty.
20:06Four.
20:07Five.
20:08No, no.
20:09Look in there.
20:10It's Mrs. Brookhaven.
20:11Six.
20:12Seven.
20:13Eight.
20:14Nine.
20:15Ten.
20:16Eleven.
20:17Twelve.
20:18Thirteen.
20:20Seven.
20:22I'm hungry.
20:23Eight.
20:24Ten.
20:25Nine.
20:30Daddy boy.
20:44All right, break it.
20:50Move it.
20:51Ah!
21:15Oh!
21:16Oh, my poor dear Daphne.
21:17Are you all right, dear?
21:19You have no idea what it was like.
21:21No spoons, no sugar, no dough.
21:27Well, we did it, Miss Brookhaven.
21:30And just look at all the money that Mr. Brookhaven won.
21:33Not to mention Mr. Callahan's $500.
21:36Oh, yeah.
21:39Let's put the champagne on ice.
21:44How about that, Dusty? You ever drink champagne?
21:46No.
21:47Yeah, me neither.
21:49Here they are, Sheriff. Those are the men.
21:51Thanks.
21:52I'll take care of them as soon as I clear up a little matter with you folks.
21:55What little matter?
21:56The $495 property damage to the Silver Bullock Saloon rendered by this gentleman.
22:02No door, two tables, two chairs, eight bottles of whiskey, six platoons, 189 glasses.
22:08I don't have any money.
22:09Well, then you don't leave me any choice. I'm gonna have to lock you up.
22:15I know it was too good to last.
22:17Here.
22:19I guess that'll cover it.
22:20That's what I call a friend.
22:22Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got a couple of arrests to make.
22:27You're really terrific, Mr. Callahan.
22:29Do I really mean more to you than that ranch in California?
22:33Well, I never thought of it exactly that way, Dusty.
22:46Come on, Dusty. Let's go.
22:48I'll be with you in a minute.
22:49Look, we're behind schedule already.
22:51Just one more punch.
22:52All right. One more punch.
23:05Well, that was a pretty tough bag you were fighting.
23:07Come on, little pal. Let's go. Let's go.
23:18THE END