Dave and Chuck the Freak talk about a man who is suing his brother-in-law for putting super glue in his belly button while he was sleeping. Then, after a call from a guy who got wax in his pubes, we talk about gluing your pubes, and more!
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00:20They always say never pass out around your creepy brother-in-law.
00:26I try not to.
00:27Why do you think a guy is suing his brother-in-law, and what does it have to do with his belly button?
00:36Well, now I think it was someone was drawing little circles with his penis around his belly button.
00:44Jesus.
00:45Are he those pouring booze in it?
00:49Yeah, I don't know.
00:50I feel like, was he trying to bang his belly button?
00:53Oh.
00:53This man is taking his brother-in-law to court because after he drank too much at a family barbecue and fell asleep in a hammock,
01:05his brother-in-law snuck up and filled his belly button with super glue.
01:15Oh, God.
01:17Okay, that's a twist.
01:18That's horrible.
01:19That's awful.
01:21That's awful.
01:21How do you even think of that?
01:22I really hated him.
01:23You're just, you hate his guts.
01:24Yeah.
01:25You've been dreaming of it.
01:27I mean, that's something you've had on deck.
01:32You didn't just, you had super glue.
01:34You're just not a crazy prankster?
01:37Maybe.
01:37Like a stupid prankster guy?
01:38Maybe that's it.
01:39I mean, I don't know.
01:40I mean, I get it.
01:41Get the glue.
01:42He passed out.
01:43But super glue is so much, it's too powerful for a prank, you know?
01:48Especially in your belly button.
01:50Super glue has always given me a weird fear.
01:53I just feel like once it's glued, it's glued.
01:56That's it.
01:56It's part of you.
01:56It's part of you.
01:59That's a new part of you.
02:01I've carried around some super glues.
02:04I put like plastic bags on my hands when I'm using it.
02:07Yeah.
02:07Oh, see, I just roll with it.
02:09But I realize, like, every once in a while, I'd be like, well, this finger's glue.
02:13Yeah, whenever I use, like, that gorilla glue, like, on the slightest thing, I'm like, oh,
02:16do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.
02:19Yeah, I use it on my little men all the time, yeah, so I'm covered in it sometimes.
02:24He says his brother-in-law filled his belly button with super glue.
02:27It landed him in the ER.
02:29They had to use solvent and ointment to remove the glue, and he ended up with a medical bill
02:35for over $2,200.
02:36This happened several months ago, and his brother-in-law has refused to pay for it, so he just took
02:43him to small claims court, and he won.
02:46Oh, yeah.
02:46He's going to win that every time.
02:48But his brother-in-law still hasn't paid.
02:50Well, you know what happens after the court says you have to pay, you go to jail.
02:55He says it's caused a big rift in his family.
02:57His wife's side thinks he overreacted, that he shouldn't have even gone to the hospital in the first place.
03:02So they're just terrible.
03:03It's terrible.
03:04He says his wife is barely on his side.
03:07God, that sucks.
03:08Her whole family sucks.
03:10Yep, they do.
03:11His brother-in-law is going through a divorce and is between jobs.
03:16Between jobs.
03:17Yeah, he's like, one of those.
03:20A between jobs prankster.
03:22Yeah, yeah.
03:22So he hasn't worked in the wild.
03:24The wife won't take him anymore.
03:25She's like, get out of here.
03:26The mother-in-law has offered to pay it off, but she's on a fixed income.
03:31Yeah.
03:31And his wife says that's not fair, so he hasn't taken her up on it.
03:36This is a weird thing to yell about, right?
03:38Because you know they have.
03:39They're like, hey, put glue in my belly button.
03:41Big deal.
03:42Big deal.
03:44Like, everyone hasn't had glue in their belly button.
03:47You go to the hospital, too.
03:49No, I wouldn't have.
03:51Yeah, huh?
03:51I would have just let it fall out naturally.
03:54You don't know how you'll be until there's super glue in your belly button.
03:58I'm not going to try it.
04:00Trauma of that.
04:03Grow up.
04:04Yeah, that's what they are.
04:05They're just like, you're a bitch.
04:06Yeah, that's it.
04:07The whole family.
04:08Crazy.
04:09And then the mom, obviously, is just like, I'm going to take care of my boy.
04:12He's in between jobs.
04:13Yeah, no matter what.
04:15Every time.
04:15Yeah.
04:15Well, it is kind of pointless to sue him if he doesn't have any money.
04:18Yeah.
04:18It's like, yeah, you'll never get paid.
04:21No.
04:21And he won't go to jail or anything like that.
04:23Just causes a lot of drama.
04:24Right.
04:24What a stupid case, really.
04:25Yeah, the judge is like.
04:27Oh, it just sucks.
04:27Yeah.
04:28I could have just been an attorney or.
04:30Yeah.
04:31Sometimes life just sucks, you know?
04:34Like, that's your family.
04:35Your extended family is just glue pranksters.
04:37Yep.
04:38Oh, you don't want a glue prankster.
04:39You don't.
04:40You don't.
04:40You don't.
04:41I would be so furious.
04:42Sure.
04:43Thank God I've got good brother-in-laws.
04:44They don't prank me.
04:45Yeah.
04:46You don't want the pranking kind.
04:47No.
04:47Oh, my God.
04:48Yeah.
04:48Drawing mustaches on you and.
04:50Oh, God.
04:51He's asleep in the hammock right now.
04:53Quick, get the glue.
04:54Get the glue.
04:55I think I hate a prankster.
04:56It's a grade school thing, right?
04:57It's just a grade school thing.
04:58Yeah, it's still, some people are still there.
05:00People who do pranks, in my mind, are stupid.
05:05Yeah.
05:06I have to agree with you.
05:09Correct.
05:10Yes.
05:11Chance is with us.
05:12Chance, you had a comment on this super glue belly button story?
05:16Very similar.
05:17So, I decided to wax my genital area while I was shirtless.
05:22And while doing so, I dropped the wax.
05:25And I instinctively bent over to pick it up and ended up securing my belly hair to my
05:30pubic hair with said wax.
05:31So, then, naturally, I'm in this bent over, stuck position where everything is kind of
05:35stuck together and it's only getting harder and worse.
05:37I stand up and, I mean, it ripped chunks of hair out of both sections.
05:41It was a complete mess.
05:42Worst pain I've ever had in those areas, for sure.
05:45But you did it to yourself.
05:46No one to sue here.
05:46Yeah, he did it to himself.
05:47No one to sue here.
05:48Yeah, unfortunately, that was all on me.
05:51Yeah.
05:52Thanks, Chance.
05:53My belly hair is almost already fused with my pubes.
06:03You could do that prank on me where you would, like, have someone, like, oh, let me, have
06:08you ever smelled your arm right here?
06:09It smells like strawberries.
06:10You gotta rub it first.
06:11You gotta rub it really hard and make it, all your hair sticks together in a twist.
06:15You could do that in my genital area.
06:17Fused to my pubes is not anything anyone should ever say.
06:21I just wouldn't stand up ever for the rest of my life.
06:24Oh, I know.
06:25Because once those hairs rip, I'd just be sitting, like, the rest of it.
06:30I'd be like, I can't stand.
06:32It's bent over Andy.
06:33Yeah, no, is his back?
06:34Did he hurt his back?
06:35No.
06:36His belly hair is fused to his pubes.
06:39Oh, that makes sense.
06:41He'll end up in the intensive care unit if he stands up.
06:43Like, you could only wear, like, clothing that would be, like, a painter's outfit, where
06:50you have to, like, zip into it all.
06:53I mean, you're bent over the whole time.
06:55Right.
06:55This is how I live now.
06:56My belly hair is fused to my pubes.
06:59Yeah, no shirts again, because how do you get those on?
07:01No.
07:02No?
07:03You don't need that.
07:04What happened to him?
07:07You wouldn't believe it if I told you.
07:09So, what was he saying?
07:11He was using wax on his pubes, but bent over, and then his stomach hair went into the wax?
07:16Yeah, but a bunch dripped, and it got all in the area, which fused everything.
07:22Are men waxing their own pubes?
07:25Apparently so.
07:26Yeah, why not?
07:27That is wild.
07:28Yeah.
07:29I just used the clippers.
07:30There's no reason to go any further.
07:31The waxing?
07:33If I, I mean, I can't even imagine, but if I had, like, just a chunk of wax,
07:38fall into my pubes.
07:42You'd have to call 911, dude.
07:45911, what's your name?
07:46I guess I, I, I probably, help!
07:51Help me!
07:52A chunk of wax fell in my pubes!
07:54We got the pube wax guy again.
07:57Can you repeat that, sir?
07:58A chunk of boiling wax fell into my pubes, instantly cooled, and is fused.
08:11Can you just cut it out, sir?
08:13No.
08:15I guarantee that's happened, probably.
08:17Oh, you know there's been.
08:19I think that, and I do think, like, if I, if that happened, you just get a razor blade
08:24and delicately try and just cut all your hairs off, right?
08:29Why can't you just use a pair of scissors and cut the wax out?
08:31Well, I'm, I'm assuming it's all the way down to the skin.
08:33It's down to the root.
08:34Yeah, it's all the way down to the root.
08:35My hair roots.
08:38Are you supposed to, I've never had waxing, are you supposed to trim your hair before
08:44they wax, like, you're not just flying out with.
08:46No, you have to wait.
08:47Yeah, you know all that.
08:49I forgot.
08:52Yeah, you have to wait several months.
08:53If it's too trimmed, you can't do it.
08:55They can't, like, grab the root, so you need it to be longer than usual.
08:58How long are we talking?
08:59A couple months.
09:01Like, how, like, inches?
09:03Uh, it's probably got to be at least an inch.
09:05Yeah, would you say, like, three, three quarters of an inch, an inch?
09:08Yeah.
09:09Yeah.
09:09It needs to be, yeah, like, grabbable and pullable.
09:12Yeah.
09:13I mean, it's no good.
09:14It hurts.
09:15It's no good.
09:15You can dissolve the wax, too.
09:18Oh, yeah.
09:18I would have a hair dryer.
09:20I'd have a hair dryer.
09:21I'd do it all.
09:22But then you'd call 911.
09:24Yeah.
09:24I mean, glue is different, but.
09:27Yeah, glue is different.
09:28I mean, I can't even.
09:29Oh, my God.
09:29If I was somehow naked making little miniature figurines.
09:35I'm sure it's happened.
09:36I'm sure it's happened.
09:38Oh, no.
09:38I hope that never happens, Chuck.
09:39I'm sure it's happened.
09:41I moved.
09:42No, it hasn't.
09:43I moved too quick.
09:44I bet you.
09:45And, like, gorilla glue openly spilled just right on the it.
09:50I mean, I don't know if I'd ever.
09:51He can't take it.
09:53He can't take a direct hit.
09:55It'd be crazy.
09:56They'd be like, this man has a space marine in his pears.
09:58Imagine that.
10:00The guys, a couple guys fell in them.
10:02Yeah.
10:02Oh, no.
10:04Oh, they're all dying to get out of Chuck's pubes.
10:06I'm still painting them.
10:08I'm, like, trying to paint.
10:10Oh, my God.
10:11Little men stuck in your pears.
10:12It's kind of, they're kind of in, like, a forest area now.
10:15Imagine at the hospital, like, what is this guy into?
10:17Yeah.
10:17He has little men hiding in his pubes.
10:19Oh, what a tragedy.
10:20What a tragedy for those chaos knights.
10:23His Warhammer games get crazy.
10:26And then the worst part is, some of those guys would have, you could see, little hairs on them.
10:32Oh, yeah, yeah.
10:33I'm like, oh, no.
10:35Yeah.
10:35Jesus.
10:36I'm like, I left the hairs.
10:38We're talking about this.
10:39They were attacked by a hair beast.
10:39I guess it has to be at least half an inch for waxing.
10:43Just in case you're wondering.
10:44Yeah.
10:45Oh, yeah.
10:46I'm wax ready.
10:47I'll tell you that right now.
10:49Mine's like an abandoned house right now.
10:51Okay.
10:51All right.
10:52Yeah, like, I'm about to have one of those guys knock on my crotch area and be like,
10:56hey, you mind if we just do all the weed whacking here?
11:00We're not going to charge him.
11:01Yeah, we're not going to charge you.
11:02We're just going to make a video.
11:03It's so out of control.
11:04A welfare check.
11:05Yeah.
11:06Yeah, a little bit.
11:06On his pubes.
11:07Yeah.
11:08Hello?
11:08Hello?
11:09Anyone?
11:10Any action down here?
11:11Anything going on?
11:12If there was a channel of just pube waxing right now, mine are in such a state that they
11:17would be like, people would watch out of morbid curiosity.
11:20Oh, yeah, yeah.
11:21Yeah.
11:21They would.
11:21They'd be like, are you ever going to be able to fix this, man?
11:24You'd be like the pimple popper.
11:25Like, people wouldn't be able to turn it off.
11:26Yeah, man.
11:26They're just unreal.
11:28Yeah, the people go around and just fix pubes situations.
11:30Yeah, I wish.
11:31I mean, if someone hasn't started that, maybe I'll start that out.
11:34Wow.
11:34So, like that home renovation show, but for pubes.
11:36Yeah.
11:37Move those pants!
11:38Woo!
11:39Ah!
11:39Oh!
11:40And then, yeah.
11:40Oh!
11:42Look at it.
11:42Unbelievable.
11:43Oh, Neil's trying one.
11:44Oh, boy.
11:45Neil, you get one more chance.
11:46You better go.
11:47Nah, there we go.
11:49All right.
11:49All right.
11:50Good morning, boys.
11:51Hey, what's up, Neil?
11:52So, I'm hearing about the belly button thing, and I was a kid.
11:56I mean, not necessarily a kid, but I was younger, and I was sitting there on my couch one
12:02day, and I had the ashtray.
12:04I was kind of, like, slouched, so I had the ashtray on my chest, but when I went to go
12:10ash my cigarette, the hot fell out, and it rolled into my belly button.
12:15Oh!
12:16And I'm telling you right now, it is the worst pain that I ever felt in my life, because I
12:22had to, like, get it out, you know?
12:24You got to fish it.
12:24So, I put my finger in there trying to get it out, and it ended up giving me third-degree
12:29burns in my belly button, dude.
12:31Yeah, you pushed it in.
12:32Yeah.
12:32You just threw some water in there.
12:34It was not a good time.
12:36No, I would have definitely went for the moist fingers instantly.
12:40I mean, I...
12:40Lick them.
12:41Spit.
12:41My belly button's deep.
12:43Mine, too.
12:43Nothing's getting out of it.
12:45Like, you couldn't hear it hit the bottom.
12:46The minds of Mordor.
12:47All right.
12:48You guys are painting quite a picture.
12:50Long pubes and deep belly buttons.
12:51Yeah, I'm pretty hot.
12:52That's their new podcast.
12:53Yeah, I'm pretty sexy.
12:54Dude, in for long pubes and deep belly buttons.
12:57I'm pretty sexy, man.
12:58Trying to land a lady.
12:59Yeah.