Emmerdale 18th April 2025
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:30Stop ignoring my calls, Kenny. I need an answer today.
00:39Alright? What are you doing here?
00:42I'd ask you the same question. What's going on?
00:44Nothing. Why?
00:47You got in late last night, you said three words,
00:49and then you set off for work at seven on a bank holiday.
00:51I can hear your brain whirring, Caleb.
00:53Wish you didn't know me so well.
00:55Yeah, well, tough. I do. So tell me.
01:00You'll need to sit down for this.
01:03Do you win anything like a car or a holiday?
01:07No, it sounds like Yorkshire Hero 2025.
01:09It'd probably just be a certificate or something.
01:12Let's have a look.
01:14You're up against a kid with one leg who's raising off her CT scanner.
01:19You've got no chance, mate.
01:20You've got every chance, pal.
01:21Well, I just appreciate being nominated.
01:23Right, is that why you've brought us?
01:25So you can show them off?
01:27No, actually, it's not.
01:28I had something that I'd like to ask you.
01:32Victoria's going to be John's best woman.
01:35So I wanted to ask you if he'd be my best man.
01:39Really?
01:43Yeah.
01:44Oh, yeah, of course. I'd love to.
01:47Can I give you a cuddle?
01:48No.
01:48Okay.
01:51Well, we all know who's going to be best.
01:53Well, your first job is to sort the stag-do out a joint one.
01:57So, thinking cap's firmly on.
02:00Captain.
02:00And don't mess this up, mate.
02:02I'm not having Vic putting all the effort in.
02:04Shut up.
02:05At least I didn't get my own fiancée to nominate me for some crummy prize.
02:08Well, I didn't do that, did I? So, it's not.
02:10I wonder who did nominate you?
02:12Jacob?
02:12Yeah, could be.
02:13Well, it could be anyone, really.
02:14Well, it definitely wasn't Kerry.
02:17Just a joke.
02:19Well, you're my Yorkshire hero, 2025, even if you don't win.
02:23Oh, he'll win.
02:31How the hell did he organise that?
02:35Friends in high places.
02:37Kim?
02:38No.
02:39No.
02:39This is all joke.
02:41You could have died, and I would never have known.
02:45No.
02:46No, don't go and see him.
02:47I'm not.
02:48Although I would like to remove all of his organs, particularly one.
02:51We're going to the police, which we should have done last night if you'd have told me.
02:53We can't.
02:54Why not?
02:59Caleb, tell me why we can't go to the police.
03:01Because he's sort of figured it out.
03:04What do you mean, sort of?
03:05He thinks that I did Anthony in.
03:08What?
03:10After Steph told him that they weren't related.
03:13And then after seeing me and you in the woods, he's started doing some digging.
03:19He's figured out there's something that's going on and he's threatening to go to the police.
03:23Steph will not cope with an interrogation.
03:28She is barely holding it together as it is.
03:31Oh my God, this is all going to explode in our faces.
03:33No, no, no, it won't.
03:35It won't happen.
03:36I won't let it, I promise.
03:39Well, me and him, we're deadlocked.
03:44Well, if you don't go to the police, then he won't?
03:47Yeah.
03:49And do you trust someone who stole your kidney?
03:53What you honestly believe someone like that is going to keep quiet?
03:57Well, make sure he does.
04:00I mean, I would ask if you wanted to join, but I'm not sure you're a fan of Big Hero 6.
04:22Yeah.
04:26Earth to Joe.
04:27You okay?
04:31Yeah, no, just still, still twinges every now and then.
04:35What did you say?
04:36Nothing important.
04:38Hey, it is important.
04:39You're important.
04:42I'm dreading seeing Billy.
04:44Yeah, the worst bit's over.
04:49I'm sorry, I can come back.
04:51It's fine.
04:53Need to grab.
04:57Well, um, the kids are really looking forward to going on the egg hunt on Monday.
05:04Not sure what you want to do about that, no?
05:06I should probably take off.
05:08Enjoy the movie.
05:10Right?
05:10Look, can we talk later?
05:19Yeah.
05:20About the egg hunt.
05:22Well, no, more I meant, like...
05:25About what we're going to tell the kids and about living arrangements.
05:31Yeah, come back at lunch.
05:33You can talk then.
05:33Sarah said you was here.
05:47She was right.
05:49Did you get my voicemail?
05:51I did.
05:52And?
05:53And I'm not killing him.
05:54And neither are you.
05:59Right, everyone's out.
06:00Come on.
06:00Is that you, Mark?
06:01No, it's me!
06:08I thought you were at work.
06:10I will be in a couple of minutes.
06:11What are you doing, Mark?
06:12I had a cancellation and I've not had any breakfast, so I came for something to eat.
06:16Well, help yourself to the one final cheese string left in the fridge.
06:20Sorry, I've got to do a shop.
06:21Now I need to go.
06:22Later, stay at us.
06:23Right, see ya.
06:23Bye.
06:27Is she gone?
06:28Yes, I think so.
06:29Well, you thought we're on kiddos.
06:33What on earth are you doing sneaking around like that?
06:35Isn't that my line?
06:36She was just gonna show me her slipknot posters.
06:38Yeah, yeah.
06:40I've heard that one a million times before.
06:41A million?
06:42How many lads have you had up there?
06:44Excuse me, are you calling my granddaughter a slapper?
06:46No, actually, you are.
06:47I think she's confusing me with herself.
06:50Hey!
06:50Do you still want to see those posters?
06:51Damn right I do.
06:53You're gonna be late for work.
06:56You're just angry.
06:59He got some scumbag to stab me.
07:02Then he had a doctor slice me open so that he could nick me kidney.
07:05All the while, he's playing the hero.
07:07And now, now he's got the balls to try and blackmail me.
07:10Yeah, too right, I'm angry.
07:11He's not gonna say anything.
07:12What, do you trust him?
07:13He's got too much to lose, just like you.
07:16And if his secret gets out, then he's done for.
07:18He's said as much.
07:18Answer the question.
07:20Do you trust him?
07:23No.
07:23Exactly.
07:24He's dangerous.
07:26Look, Ruby's flipping out.
07:28I can't risk anything happening to her.
07:30Steph's on the edge of her breakdown.
07:31And if the police start digging, which they will,
07:34then you, Chas, Aaron and John could all end up inside.
07:38He could tear our family apart like that.
07:41But if he's out of the way,
07:42it's problem solved.
07:45So what?
07:47Stab him?
07:47Shoot him?
07:48Strangle him?
07:48Don't set a mick.
07:49I'm not.
07:50I'm just trying to make you see how stupid this is.
07:52And you know it is.
07:54Look, I'll help you find a way to stop him,
07:56but kill him now.
07:59You still owe me one.
08:00I know I do.
08:01But not like this.
08:02She is 19 years old.
08:13I know.
08:15But you know, I basically let it happen under my roof.
08:18We do it under your roof.
08:20On the sofa, in the kitchen, on the stairs.
08:23All right.
08:24All right.
08:26It's not the same, though, is it?
08:27I need to have a word with you.
08:29You watch the bar for a bit.
08:31Just...
08:31let her run around my life.
08:33Ruin it, more like.
08:35Oh, fine.
08:37So go on then.
08:37Am I going to be expecting you rolling home drunk tonight?
08:40No, I'll have one more in then I'm done.
08:43Come on, cheer up.
08:44He's asked you to be best man,
08:46not most miserable man.
08:48You're Aaron's best man?
08:50Yeah.
08:51You look surprised.
08:53No, no, not at all.
08:54Just, er, don't let my son down
08:56because he deserves the best stag do ever.
08:59She sounds like John.
09:01They both start to sound the same.
09:02Just ignore them both.
09:04Hey, I've got faith in you, babe.
09:05Yeah.
09:10So, strippers.
09:12Oh, yeah.
09:13Yeah, write that down, Vic.
09:14Yeah, yes, please.
09:15Er, two firemen with really big hoses.
09:18Yes.
09:19Oh, no.
09:20Scratch that, then.
09:22You're an idiot.
09:23Don't worry.
09:23We don't want strippers anyway.
09:24Right, we'll go to, er, Amsterdam.
09:27Well, you're not coming on the stag do, so.
09:28Right, fine.
09:29I'll go on his stag, then.
09:30No, because mothers and mother-in-laws aren't invited.
09:32John, do you think that your mother-in-law from hell
09:35needs to go on the stag do?
09:38Erm, what?
09:40Look at his face.
09:42I'm only kidding.
09:43It's going to be no strippers anyway,
09:44so there's no point.
09:45Enjoy.
09:45I'm going to be a millionaire with that drink, am I?
09:58Well, Sam's giving me another dirt bike session later.
10:00I need to be focused.
10:02Oh, in that case, it's on the house.
10:03Because if I've got anything to do with this,
10:04you are going to train like mad
10:06and wipe the floor with that cammy.
10:07Do you hear me?
10:07You really don't like him, do you?
10:09Come on, do you?
10:10Mm.
10:11Mm.
10:23You wanted to meet.
10:24At least be on time.
10:25You idiot.
10:55Leave it.
10:56You could have killed me.
10:57Yeah, that was the point.
10:58I came here to hear you out.
10:59You said you wanted to talk.
11:01I said, aren't you going to do something like this?
11:02Just get yourself out of here.
11:04Yeah, happy to.
11:07This is not over.
11:09I hope not.
11:10Don't.
11:10Just go.
11:15You had a joke.
11:16Do you know that?
11:18If I had stopped you,
11:19you'd be inside.
11:21And then where would Ruby and Steph be, eh?
11:23Are you serious?
11:23What you've done
11:25is put our family in more danger.
11:27He'll be driving straight to the police now.
11:28Well, if he does, it's on you.
11:32Don't let work interfere
11:33with your shopping spree, Ben.
11:34Okay, right, sorry.
11:36What needs to do him?
11:36Nothing, because I have done it all.
11:39Great.
11:40Well, you go and have a nice little break
11:41and I'll take care of things from now on.
11:43Why is Bob texting you that Cammie's back at the garage?
11:49Have you got Bob spying for you?
11:50No!
11:52Don't lie to me!
11:54Oh, what's he done now to get your knickers in a twist?
11:56Well, he's...
11:57He's very cheeky.
11:59And he's having sex with Sarah in my house.
12:01Oh!
12:02Good God!
12:03Sling him in jail.
12:05All right, I know it's not that bad.
12:07I also know that it's a bad influence.
12:10Is this not the same lad
12:11who offered to take the fall for Sarah?
12:15Maybe you need to focus on her.
12:17She is the one that's on the rob
12:18and locking poor Rodders in the back of a van.
12:20Well, I am worried about her.
12:22And that is why I'm worried about him.
12:24Is she happy?
12:26Oh, maybe.
12:27I'll take that as a yes, then.
12:30Leave her be.
12:32You know what?
12:33You're doing my head in.
12:34I'm going on my break.
12:35Well, hang on a minute.
12:36Why is she sobering in ten minutes?
12:37I don't go too far.
12:39I need to see a guy about a dirt bike.
12:43You've got enough stags here
12:44to start your own deer sanctuary.
12:46What about you?
12:48Names, mates, numbers?
12:51Well, he's got me, hasn't he?
12:53And, um, Aaron's family.
12:55Well, that doesn't count.
12:56Anyone else?
12:58It's a joint stag,
12:59so they're all going to be there for both of us.
13:01Right, well, this is my round, yeah.
13:03See him again?
13:04Yeah.
13:04Ta.
13:04I'll go through the list tonight and get rid of some of my names.
13:13Are you sure?
13:13Yeah.
13:14It's not really fair on it, is it?
13:15And just make sure that you don't tell him.
13:18Are we not going to talk about the fact that it's weird that he doesn't have inmates?
13:21Well, how many have you got?
13:22That's a great point.
13:26Hey.
13:27You missed one.
13:30Oh, rough day.
13:32Had a bit of a knock.
13:34What do you mean, a knock?
13:36Don't worry about it.
13:37How's Billy after I left?
13:39Yeah, fine.
13:39I mean, I've told him we need to talk about living arrangements
13:41and telling the kids, so he's going to be back any minute.
13:43You made the right decision.
13:45For you and for the kids.
13:47Yeah.
13:48If we're going to move forward, we can't keep dragging up the past.
13:51Got to break that cycle.
13:52No matter how tough it is.
13:56Wise words.
13:58Good luck.
14:04Do you want a brew?
14:07Just to get this over with.
14:16Please don't tell me he's given up already.
14:18Eh?
14:18No, he's gone for a was.
14:20Ah.
14:21Is he any good?
14:22What, going to the toilet?
14:24No, he's quite good for a beginner.
14:27Good.
14:27So he's not going to end up dead in a ditch.
14:29Yeah, he's a natural.
14:31Great.
14:31So the race is definitely on, then.
14:33Take that as a compliment.
14:35Ha-ha!
14:35Well done, you!
14:36Hey, Sam's a good teacher.
14:38Right.
14:39What's the first rule of dirt biking?
14:40Keep your mouth closed.
14:42Exactly.
14:43The only one eating dirt should be...
14:45Cammie.
14:46My guy.
14:47Right, on your bike.
14:48Oh.
14:50Start her up.
14:57And make the first truck win, win!
14:59Eh?
15:00Bye-bye.
15:03Oh, I meant to ask you, how much are we getting for this?
15:06Well, if you can make sure Jacob wins, you get three beers.
15:10For a week?
15:11Make it two.
15:12But no win, no beer.
15:14Okay?
15:14I think we say we're still friends.
15:23And we'll still spend loads of time together.
15:27If that's what you want.
15:28Um, I think we're gonna have to really look after Clemmie.
15:35Especially.
15:35But if we do this, properly, they will understand Billy.
15:47Yeah, I'm glad that they will.
15:49Because I don't...
15:50Don't get any of this.
15:53Please don't do this.
15:54Don, I know I wasn't perfect.
15:58Like, can we not just at least talk about this?
16:00Like, we've...
16:01We've been through too much to just throw it all away.
16:04I wouldn't have done this if I wasn't absolutely sure.
16:13Yeah, okay.
16:17I'll find somewhere else to live, then.
16:20Probably for the best.
16:23For the kids, for me.
16:27Just one thing.
16:28I'll move out.
16:32I want to see the kids, like, like a lot.
16:37Of course.
16:39They're gonna want to see you.
16:41Billy.
16:42You're never gonna stop being in their lives.
16:48Anything else?
16:49I think we should swerve the egg hunt.
17:00Just this year.
17:04Okay.
17:04Go-karting?
17:20No, I've already been.
17:21Zorbin.
17:22I'm not throwing myself down some hill at a massive rubber ball.
17:25But you can't keep poo-pooing all our ideas.
17:27So then come up with some good ones.
17:28I'm gonna agree with them, won't we, John?
17:30Yeah, I'll do whatever.
17:31Just...
17:33Do you know what?
17:34Why are we even asking them?
17:36You're the best man.
17:37I'm best woman.
17:38We decide.
17:39No argument.
17:40Morph seats.
17:40I'm gonna get some more drinks.
17:46Is Grant around?
17:48No, she finished a while ago.
17:49Oh, great.
17:50We'll stay, then.
17:51Cheeky.
17:52Although you might have to go on a charm offensive if this is serious.
17:56Yeah, I'll win around.
17:58No worries.
17:59I've got serious frizz.
18:01Wow, confident.
18:02I like it.
18:02Drinks?
18:03Erm, two orange juices, please.
18:06Look, maybe it would be a good idea if you can prove to my gran that she can trust you.
18:09You've changed your tune before you were all, talk to the hand, granny.
18:13I know, but life would be so much easier if she liked you and she can hold a serious grudge.
18:18Yeah, well, I was serious about winning a round.
18:20Because I'm serious about you.
18:23John's still on the phone, right?
18:25Er, yeah, I think so.
18:26Good.
18:27That gives me time.
18:28Time for what?
18:29I'm gonna email his whole platoon.
18:31See if I can find his mates.
18:33Budget.
18:34Right, the mum's gonna bring the drinks over.
18:37What you did on that?
18:38None of your business.
18:39Did you really not nominate her?
18:43No, did I?
18:44Heck.
18:45He'd be one of his mad patients who loved his bedside manner.
18:47Hello.
19:04Yep, this is him.
19:05Mm-hmm.
19:08Well, that's...
19:09That's great.
19:11So...
19:11So when do they announce the winner?
19:15Well, that's soon.
19:17Well, I might have to come along to the ceremony.
19:19I'd love to see him win.
19:20Mm-hmm.
19:22Yeah, yeah.
19:25Yeah, well, um...
19:27Since we last spoke, he's saved another life.
19:30Mm-hmm.
19:31Yeah, a medical student, actually, called Jacob Gallagher.
19:36Gallagher, yeah.
19:37Yeah, that's why I rang earlier.
19:40I thought you might want to know, just in case it helps him win.
19:43Mm-hmm.
19:46Listen, um...
19:47John won't know who I nominated him, will he?
19:52Spotlight should be on his heroics, not on me.
19:57Great.
20:03I take it your day hasn't improved.
20:05Well, nor is mine.
20:05I have been going over and over this in my head.
20:09Is Joe definitely going to keep quiet?
20:14Who knows?
20:18I suppose you've told her everything.
20:20If you come anywhere near my family again, you will be looking for more than a new kidney.
20:24Have you got some sort of death wish turning up here again?
20:26Well, you couldn't even manage to bump me off, so no, I don't think so.
20:30You didn't.
20:31Well, you did.
20:32You did.
20:33Bless him.
20:34It was actually his brother who got involved and stopped him.
20:36I'm starting to wonder whether you did even kill Anthony, because you're not very good at it.
20:41Cain will not be there.
20:42I'll save you next time.
20:44Do you want to know what our problem is?
20:46Well, go on.
20:47Bet this is going to be good.
20:48We're too similar.
20:51I mean, we both like being in charge.
20:54We're both survivors.
20:56Okay, let me stop you there.
20:59We are not the same.
21:01Because I've got something that you haven't.
21:03A big hole where your kidney should be.
21:05I've got a family.
21:07You see, everything that I do, I do for them.
21:09Everything that you do, you do for yourself.
21:14So don't you ever, ever compare us again.
21:19The door's there, posh boy.
21:24But we're not really finished, though, are we?
21:25I think it's fair to say that this truce of ours is well and truly off the table.
21:30You're going to the police?
21:31No.
21:32No, neither of us are that stupid, are we?
21:34But we have started something.
21:36And we do have to finish it.
21:38Well, I'm ready.
21:41You'll never be ready.
21:48This week's guest is Ned Porteous, who plays the devilish kidney kidnapper, Joe Tate, in Emmerdale.
21:59Stay with us as Coronation Street is right here, next.