First broadcast 18th February 2020.
Jimmy Carr
Rob Beckett
Katherine Ryan
John Pohlhammer
Stacey Solomon
Darren Harriott
Thomas Skinner
Sarah Keyworth
Jimmy Carr
Rob Beckett
Katherine Ryan
John Pohlhammer
Stacey Solomon
Darren Harriott
Thomas Skinner
Sarah Keyworth
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00We've got Scarlet Beaver.
00:24It's Scarlet Muffet.
00:27She's a stand-up lady.
00:29It's Harriet Kemsley and Rob Beckett, their team captain.
00:36And facing that tonight, show her the funny.
00:40It's Rosie Jones, Leslie Kan.
00:44It's Wes Nelson and Tom Allen, their guest team captain.
00:50Now, welcome your host, Jimmy Paul.
00:59Hello and welcome to Editor 10 Cats, a show about opinion polls, surveys and statistics.
01:04Did you know, for example, one in four Americans didn't read a book last year?
01:09Probably because they were too busy reading other stuff, like menus.
01:13The average person sleeps 6.8 hours a night.
01:17The myth was people slept for eight hours a night, but we can put that to bed for 6.8 hours.
01:22Nearly a fifth of cat owners get up before 6am to feed their cats.
01:27Wow, talk about pussy whipped.
01:30And 27% of people describe the feeling of cleaning their inbox as amazing.
01:36Little tip, if you are cleaning your inbox, make sure you do it front to back.
01:39LAUGHTER
01:40Right, let's get started.
01:42APPLAUSE
01:44What are you talking about?
01:50That's the name of our first round.
01:51Tonight, it's our panellist's job to guess the nation's most talked-about TV moments of the last year.
01:57Tom's team, what television shows do you think people chatted about the last year?
02:00Whoa, cop.
02:02I bloody loved it.
02:04You missed it, Wes.
02:05What?
02:06Yeah, cos she was getting with Meghan on Love Island.
02:08And, you know, Meghan is fit, but she's not England beating Columbia on penalties fit.
02:12LAUGHTER
02:14I mean, France won in the end.
02:15That's, you can imagine, they were a very civilised bottle of champagne.
02:18Maybe smoke a Gouloir.
02:19Lovely.
02:20Right, but in the UK, what would we have done?
02:24What would we have done?
02:25You know, get his throat beer over everybody, jump on an ambulance and take your clothes off.
02:29It's disgusting.
02:30LAUGHTER
02:31You're being slightly, I mean, you know, you've been a bit of a killjoy there.
02:34It brought a lot of people a lot of joy.
02:35Take a look at how happy people were.
02:38CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
02:42That's a hell of a money shot, isn't it?
02:57Well done.
02:59That's how Tom reacts when TM Lewin bring out a new line of pocket squares.
03:03What's funny about it, it was, like, one of the best we've done in the tournament for years and years.
03:08We've done quite well, didn't we?
03:10Yeah.
03:11LAUGHTER
03:13I lost my marbles, basically.
03:15I was just, it was an eat-wave.
03:16We were winning in the World Cup, I was on about four barbecues a day.
03:19LAUGHTER
03:21I think it was the heat.
03:22I think dehydration and drinking and all that, like,
03:25barbecue food goes to people's heads.
03:27And also, just seeing the grass, yellow, just sent me over the...
03:31Oh, it was so yellow, all the grass in the summer.
03:33It was like a weird cheese dream, the World Cup, for me.
03:35LAUGHTER
03:37Harriet, did you watch any of the World Cup?
03:39No, well, I'm just really glad that they finally finished football.
03:42LAUGHTER
03:44I actually did find it quite educational.
03:46Like, I learnt that Belgium was a country.
03:48LAUGHTER
03:50I just thought it was a type of chocolate.
03:52LAUGHTER
03:54Is caramel a country? I know.
03:56What about Brazil nut? Country or nut?
03:58Yeah, it's country or nut.
04:00No, no, no, no.
04:02We do know.
04:03LAUGHTER
04:04We all know.
04:06LAUGHTER
04:07I got so overwhelmed by it.
04:08I watched the Columbia game when we won on penalties,
04:11and I watched that in a snooker-all, right?
04:14And I jumped up in the air and I fell to my knees,
04:17cried and kissed the floor.
04:19Of a snooker-all.
04:20LAUGHTER
04:22Rosie, did you get World Cup fever?
04:24Yeah, I did, and a little girl went out because for four weeks,
04:32everyone was assholes.
04:36LAUGHTER
04:37So I put in.
04:39LAUGHTER
04:42The nights out afterwards, everyone just lost their mind on nights out.
04:46I was watching it in South East London, and all the people out there...
04:49I mean, I know Columbia lost the match, but I think their economy won.
04:52LAUGHTER
04:54Not from me,
04:55but there were a lot of people enjoying themselves.
04:57LAUGHTER
04:58I don't like to think about you on cocaine.
05:00What would happen?
05:01All that chewing, you'd go through a tree.
05:03LAUGHTER
05:05APPLAUSE
05:07OK, shall we have a look and see whether the World Cup is up there?
05:16Yes, it's England's World Cup campaign.
05:19As a keen football fan, I enjoyed last summer's World Cup so much,
05:22I can't wait for this year's.
05:24LAUGHTER
05:27Rob's team, what TV moments do you think people have been talking about?
05:30Well, there was a huge royal wedding.
05:33Harry and Meghan. Yeah.
05:34I like Meghan, I've got a lot of time for Meghan.
05:37You know, she's come from a bit of a rough family, didn't she?
05:39She was on telly for a little bit, she's had a divorce.
05:42Like, in this country, she'd end up, like, on celebs go dating,
05:45but she's American, so she's got that confidence
05:48and started coming over and banging her prince.
05:51I mean, I know he's a ginger one, but he's still a prince.
05:53LAUGHTER
05:54Did you hear about their courtship as well?
05:56Apparently, on the third date, he asked her to go camping in Botswana.
06:00I mean, firstly, who goes on three dates?
06:02LAUGHTER
06:04Secondly, all my dates are camp.
06:06LAUGHTER
06:08And as well, on a third date, really, I just want to be taken to Carluccio's
06:13and not for the set menu.
06:14LAUGHTER
06:15Should we have a look at the moment everyone was waiting for, the kiss?
06:19This is kind of the most romantic thing that happened.
06:21Or not?
06:22LAUGHTER
06:24Bright looking radiant.
06:28And there is the kiss that everyone was hoping for and waiting for.
06:32I mean, she's a hell of an actress, isn't she?
06:34LAUGHTER
06:36That's not the one we were hoping for.
06:38That's what we got, but we would have loved it, like...
06:40LAUGHTER
06:41LAUGHTER
06:43Both going for it.
06:44APPLAUSE
06:47Did you hear as well, apparently, viewing figures were down,
06:49and I sort of thought, well, probably they need to take a leaf out of Netflix's book,
06:52you know, break it into six episodes,
06:55some drag queens and a vegan and a serial killer in it,
06:59and then people will watch.
07:01LAUGHTER
07:03Did you get off with a drag queen?
07:06Yeah.
07:07LAUGHTER
07:09It was New Year's Eve,
07:11I had a lot of sambucus.
07:15LAUGHTER
07:17I was running out of choices,
07:21and I thought...
07:24Fuck it.
07:25LAUGHTER
07:28I actually went for the wedding.
07:30What? What?
07:31So you were at the wedding, were you?
07:32Yeah, no.
07:33No, no, let's have a look.
07:34LAUGHTER
07:35Are you at the wedding?
07:37Coming up now, this is so awesome.
07:40Like, the real life Megan is driving up.
07:44She's going to be driving past very shortly.
07:47I'm going to...
07:48You can hear the crowds going now.
07:50She's about to drive past.
07:51I can't wait to see a glimpse.
07:54Oh, wow, she looks amazing!
07:56LAUGHTER
07:58LAUGHTER
08:00Scarlett, have you kept in touch with her?
08:09LAUGHTER
08:11It looks like you was commentating on a bank job from the 40s.
08:14LAUGHTER
08:15There we go.
08:17Wait, did you watch it?
08:18I did. I think it's an amazing thing as well,
08:20I think, to see two cultures come together as well.
08:22So it's an amazing sort of wedding, I think, isn't it?
08:25Yeah.
08:26What a lovely sentiment for a bloke who's spaffed all over a villa in Spain.
08:29LAUGHTER
08:32Rosie, what do you think?
08:34So, coming into it, I was like, no, it's shit.
08:40LAUGHTER
08:41I am not watching it.
08:44I'm going to go out, I'm going to have a pizza.
08:49LAUGHTER
08:50And I got up, and I put my telly on,
08:57and that was it, crying.
09:00LAUGHTER
09:01And I was like, this is her birthday of my life.
09:07LAUGHTER
09:09Oh, my God, Dianne, she'll be here to see you.
09:15LAUGHTER
09:16Yeah, I can't believe she didn't go.
09:18LAUGHTER
09:20It's so sad cos the Queen has this protocol
09:23where it's like, no-one's allowed to approach her,
09:25like, she has to approach them,
09:26but I just really hope that someone's told the Queen that,
09:29otherwise she's going to be so lonely that no-one's even said hi.
09:33LAUGHTER
09:35I always find it strange as well, the only sort of normal people
09:38the royals ever meet are those ones who, like,
09:40camp outside hospitals and stuff and cathedrals.
09:43And you think, no wonder they want to surround themselves with guards
09:45all the time when they're like, oh, look, here's another one, you know,
09:48dressed in a Union Jack flag suit with a Princess Diana tray stapled to his head.
09:52LAUGHTER
09:53I think, oh, I'll just stay in the palace all the time.
09:56LAUGHTER
09:58Wes, do you go to a lot of weddings?
09:59I know you're involved in a lot of love on an island.
10:02I haven't, I haven't.
10:03We all seem to break up after six months.
10:05LAUGHTER
10:06So, no, there's not many, not many wedding bells, but, um...
10:09No, I do like weddings.
10:10Mainly the afters, the boozy bit, that's the best part for me.
10:13Really, Wes? Do you booze?
10:14LAUGHTER
10:15Well, it was my 21st birthday two days ago,
10:19so I've been on a birth week celebration, absolutely.
10:22Broke myself off, yeah.
10:24Happy birthday.
10:24Happy birthday.
10:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
10:31So, who did you celebrate with?
10:33I celebrated with all my friends from home,
10:34so I've barely seen them, cos I had five months.
10:36Sorry, your friends from home?
10:37From, like, Stoke, so up north.
10:39But you were on Love Island and then you went on the ice skating show.
10:42Yeah.
10:43But you've still got your old friends.
10:45LAUGHTER
10:47Am I doing this all wrong?
10:48No, no, no, no, you have to say goodbye to them forever.
10:50LAUGHTER
10:52Was it this one or was it the other one where they moved home?
10:55Sometimes, we're all weddings, they move the homeless people on
10:57because they don't want them to be pictured, but...
10:59Yeah, but, to be fair, if I've just spent 15 grand on a wedding,
11:01I'd want to move them along as well, bitch.
11:03You ruined the photo here, mate.
11:04LAUGHTER
11:05You've changed, Rob, you've changed.
11:07That isn't your persona.
11:08No, it isn't.
11:09You're a lovable Cockney lad, you can't be like,
11:10Fuck off, you tramps.
11:11LAUGHTER
11:15OK, let's have a look and see if it's up there.
11:17APPLAUSE
11:19Yes, Harry and Meghan's wedding.
11:23Meghan Markle is an actress.
11:25Her most impressive role to date is playing a super-fit American TV star,
11:28who's genuinely got the hots for a ginger kid.
11:30LAUGHTER
11:32Harry gave Meghan an engagement ring featuring diamonds
11:35that had belonged to his mother, Princess Diana.
11:37It served both as a fitting tribute to his mother
11:40and a constant reminder to Meghan of what could happen
11:42if she ever steps out of line.
11:44APPLAUSE
11:46Well, that's it for part one.
11:48See you after the break.
11:50CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
11:52Welcome back to We're Out of 10 Cats.
12:07We're still trying to guess the top TV moments of the last year.
12:09OK, fingers on buzzers.
12:10Psss!
12:11Scarlett, what do you think?
12:12Erm, Doctor Who.
12:14What about Doctor Who?
12:15Well, what about it?
12:16Do I have to explain?
12:17LAUGHTER
12:17Honey, when it was the first ever female Doctor,
12:20we got a Barbie Doctor Who and everything.
12:23It was proper girl power.
12:25Sorry, a Barbie Doctor Who was the good bit about there being a female Doctor Who?
12:28Well, it's...
12:28Well, yeah, because Barbie is every occupation that a woman can do,
12:32so now we've got Barbie pilots and, like, Barbie everything,
12:36and now you can be a Barbie Doctor Who.
12:38Yeah, but Barbie's a bad role model,
12:40because she's, like, really skinny.
12:41I think unless you're going to give her, like, a normal body,
12:44then I think the least we could do is give Ken a massive dick.
12:47LAUGHTER
12:48Level the playing field, my body's insecure too.
12:53So, let's take a look at the dramatic moment
12:55Jodie Whittaker took over as Doctor Who.
12:58I let you go.
13:10I let you go.
13:26Oh, brilliant.
13:36Did she crash the car straight away?
13:37No!
13:42I mean, that's definitely what it looks like happened.
13:44You went, the Doctor's Nail woman, oh, hang on, what's this do?
13:47Bang.
13:49What kind of a role model's that?
13:51I do like it, but I'm not sure the first episode
13:58was a little unbelievable,
14:02because if you've been in a male body for so long,
14:09and you then become a woman,
14:13you wouldn't save the world.
14:17You'll be like,
14:19what's going on down here?
14:24So, you would have preferred a first episode
14:26where the Doctor just wanked?
14:27LAUGHTER
14:28Everyone's always saying, like,
14:34did you see Doctor Who?
14:37I think I can't even see my own Doctor,
14:38never mind Doctor Pissing Who.
14:42I think, you know, it's stupid to go like,
14:44oh, there shouldn't be a female Doctor Who.
14:45I think the only time where you should have a preference
14:47over what, like, if it's a male or female Doctor,
14:50is if you've got something wrong with your dick or your bumhole.
14:52LAUGHTER
14:53Personally, I like an old geezer that's seen it all before.
14:56LAUGHTER
14:58I like an old man.
14:59Do you?
15:00Why?
15:01Do you get nervous?
15:02I feel like he's got what I've got,
15:04and he's seen it all before.
15:05What, you've got an old man dick?
15:07LAUGHTER
15:08I've got an old man dick!
15:09I had the, uh...
15:11LAUGHTER
15:13It's so withered!
15:16Harriet, what do you think?
15:18All the old men are like, oh, it's really bad.
15:20One of the old doctors said,
15:21oh, it's bad they're getting rid of all the male role models
15:24for young boys, just James Bond, Luke Skywalker, Frodo,
15:28Superman, Spider-Man, Batman, all the presidents,
15:30all the Prime Ministers apart from two.
15:32There just aren't enough!
15:33What are the boys going to do?
15:35APPLAUSE
15:37Take Frodo out of that list.
15:39LAUGHTER
15:41Well, I can tell you, Jodie Whittaker
15:48becoming the first female Doctor Who is not up there,
15:50but I thought the new series of Doctor Who was brilliant.
15:53It was just nice to see a northern girl in a phone box,
15:55not getting fingered.
15:56LAUGHTER
15:58You can't see him!
16:00I just did.
16:01I just did.
16:03I just did.
16:04APPLAUSE
16:06Right, fingers on buzzers, one more thing to get.
16:08What other television shows do you think people chatted about
16:10the last year?
16:12OK, Rob?
16:13I mean, it's got to be Love Island, didn't it?
16:15Ugh.
16:16Wes was in Love Island.
16:17What? Wes?
16:18Why didn't you tell her?
16:19LAUGHTER
16:21I think this is the longest you've been on a TV show
16:24without banging someone, and it was.
16:25LAUGHTER
16:26Not sure if you were.
16:27OK, let's talk about Wes's incredibly confident introduction
16:30to the show.
16:31If I was going to be an emoji, I would be the aubergine,
16:35because I have a big wank.
16:40I'm Wes.
16:41I'm 20 years old.
16:42I'm from Staffordshire.
16:43I'm a design engineer in the electrical and the nuclear industries.
16:51I'd mark myself as a 9.999 out of 10.
16:55I'm pretty damn perfect.
16:57Oh!
17:00That's probably the most cringy thing I've ever seen in my life.
17:03Cringy?
17:04Cringy, yeah.
17:04I liked all of it.
17:07I liked the bit when you talked about how big your wang was.
17:10Because I'm on TV a lot, and I never really...
17:13I never mentioned Little Jimmy.
17:14Never mentioned it.
17:15It's never...
17:16It's never come up.
17:16LAUGHTER
17:18Now, Love Island, how was your experience on Love Island?
17:21No, it was so good.
17:22It was probably the best thing I've ever done.
17:24And as a young lad, I think everyone wants to go on Love Island.
17:27I know I always did.
17:28LAUGHTER
17:29Yeah, it's good.
17:30Is there...
17:30Why are they no...
17:31There's no gay dudes on Love Island?
17:32There might be next year.
17:33Ooh!
17:34Ooh!
17:35Prime contender, right here!
17:36LAUGHTER
17:37I'll give you the contracts.
17:39I'll be keeping my suit on.
17:42I'd like to go on it, but they're really discriminatory.
17:45Like, they won't let me go on it just because I've got a husband.
17:47LAUGHTER
17:49I would like to see a version of Love Island for normal people.
17:52Um, just for normal body shapes, and I'd call it Love Handle Island.
17:55LAUGHTER
17:57OK.
17:57Love Island has some fun challenges.
17:59Take a look at these raucous scenes.
18:05I don't think it was possible to fancy worse any more than I already did.
18:08Oh, my God!
18:09Oh, my God!
18:10LAUGHTER
18:12LAUGHTER
18:14LAUGHTER
18:16LAUGHTER
18:18LAUGHTER
18:19That's yours.
18:20Yeah.
18:20That's mine.
18:21LAUGHTER
18:22Oh!
18:23Oh!
18:23Oh!
18:24Oh!
18:25Oh, my goodness!
18:25Oh, my goodness!
18:26Sexy!
18:26What sort of firefighter has a high-vis just round their neck?
18:33LAUGHTER
18:34I'm sorry, Wes.
18:35I shan't be buying your calendar.
18:38He's joking.
18:38He will.
18:41Wes, when you're on there, right, and you're having sex with someone on there, right,
18:44and you know that everyone at home's watching,
18:46does it not, like, go to the back of your mind that your mum's going to see this?
18:49No, it was...
18:49To be fair, my mum was all right with it,
18:51because obviously you don't see everything,
18:52and I imagine she was hiding behind the pillow when any bits was happening.
18:55Yeah.
18:55Um, no, she was super proud of us.
18:57It was a good...
18:58It was so fun.
18:59LAUGHTER
19:03My boy has smashed the back doors in there.
19:07That's incredible work.
19:08Oh, have you seen my Wes?
19:09He's so good at shagging, isn't he?
19:11LAUGHTER
19:13That wag!
19:14Oh!
19:15Come on!
19:15She could barely walk down to the pool the next morning.
19:20It's a cultural phenomenon.
19:21There's a lot of language that goes along with it.
19:23Maybe you could translate for us.
19:24Could you explain me the Do-Bit Society?
19:27Yeah, so the Do-Bit Society.
19:28So when people didn't really want to talk about what they'd done on the night before,
19:31and maybe some people didn't know,
19:32I created a little system, a society,
19:34that people could explain what they did without going into too much detail.
19:37So there's level one, two and three.
19:38Okay.
19:39Level three bits, you've got any over-cutting touching.
19:42So that's sort of like...
19:43Over-cutting, what?!
19:44So that's like...
19:46Spooning.
19:47It could be anything.
19:48It could be just fundling.
19:49Then level two.
19:50Level two.
19:51Anything but sex, essentially.
19:52Anything but sex is level two.
19:54So that's undercut.
19:55Anything but sex.
19:56LAUGHTER
19:58And then you've got level one.
20:00Level one's full-blown, full-blown.
20:02Full-blown.
20:03That's it.
20:03That blown is after Buster.
20:05LAUGHTER
20:07So there's three levels.
20:09There's three levels, yeah.
20:10What is salty?
20:11Salty argument's getting bitter.
20:12Ooh.
20:14Salty and bitter.
20:15Oh, that's a bit salt, yeah.
20:15Why wouldn't you just say bitter?
20:17But you couldn't say bitter because it sounds like Do-Bits.
20:19What's all that about?
20:20Do-Bits Society.
20:21Do-Bits Society.
20:21Because my mum always says,
20:23I'm going into town, I've got to do some bits,
20:24and it's really made me happy.
20:25LAUGHTER
20:26It only happens up north in phone boxes, no?
20:28LAUGHTER
20:31Why does everyone keep looking at me
20:33when they talk about getting fingered in phone boxes?
20:35I think that's never happened to me.
20:37Oh, sorry, you've never been fingered in a phone box?
20:39No!
20:41That's never happened.
20:42Have you ever kissed someone in a phone box?
20:43No, who?
20:45I'm not being funny.
20:45I'm only 28.
20:47Like, I've had a mobile phone since I was 12.
20:49LAUGHTER
20:51I've never needed to go into a phone box.
20:54LAUGHTER
20:55What is this?
20:57I can tell you, Love Island is not one of the most talked about things,
21:00but if you haven't seen Love Island,
21:02it's basically the finger-banging Olympics.
21:05LAUGHTER
21:08Are you talking to this?
21:09What?
21:10They just caught a shot of me when he said that.
21:13LAUGHTER
21:14What is happening to you?
21:15What is happening to you?
21:16Oh, I'm sorry.
21:18APPLAUSE
21:20Yeah.
21:21Sorry, no, that's incredibly rude that we cut to a shot of you.
21:24Could the shot be of Scarlet all the way through that?
21:25LAUGHTER
21:28The show's official sponsor was Superdrug,
21:30and what those Superdrugs are for is treating Supergonorrhea.
21:33LAUGHTER
21:35OK, one more thing to get.
21:37Fingers on buzzers.
21:38BUZZER
21:39Guy, what do you think?
21:39It's got to be Dancing on Ice.
21:41Oh, yeah.
21:42The GC and Wes was on it as well.
21:45Wes?
21:45You were on Dancing on Ice.
21:46Big show.
21:47I wasn't.
21:47And Torval and Dean were on it.
21:49I bet they were happy, weren't they?
21:50Oh.
21:51They had not had any work.
21:51Imagine their agent getting that call.
21:53Torval and Dean!
21:54LAUGHTER
21:55You all got Torval and Dean's number?
21:57LAUGHTER
21:58Torval, you with Dean?
21:59LAUGHTER
21:59Ring Harvester and tell him you can't do Sundays.
22:02LAUGHTER
22:09Yeah, we all saw you come second on Love Island.
22:11LAUGHTER
22:12You really are a man for all seasons, aren't you, Wes?
22:13Dancing on Ice, Love Island.
22:15What are you going to do next?
22:16Spring Watch?
22:17LAUGHTER
22:18LAUGHTER
22:20Love it.
22:20LAUGHTER
22:22Lovely.
22:23Lovely. Very nice.
22:24The GC on Dancing on Ice,
22:26should we take a look at her in action?
22:28Yeah.
22:28Graceful.
22:30Beautiful.
22:31I can barely recall
22:33But it's home
22:34Coming back to me now
22:37The thing I love about that is the fact that when she gets up,
23:04it's kind of like, do you think anyone noticed?
23:05LAUGHTER
23:07Anyone see that?
23:08No, got away with it.
23:09LAUGHTER
23:10I love Trevor, I think she's class.
23:12Amazing.
23:12She's so funny.
23:13I mean, reality TV gold.
23:14But she described herself as a diva, and like, I mean, it is true,
23:17whatever you think of diva, you think of like, Liza Minnelli,
23:19Barbara Streisand, Gemma Collins, you know?
23:22It doesn't fit.
23:23Well, the thing is, I think to be a diva, you have to be talented.
23:26You're not talented.
23:27You're not a diva, you're just a twat.
23:29LAUGHTER
23:31It's true, I'm sorry.
23:33The truth hurts.
23:35The truth hurts.
23:36Boring.
23:38You were brilliant on it, by the way, Wes.
23:40Thank you very much, Ray.
23:41You know what, Wes, honestly, me and all my friends went, like,
23:45skating, cos we went to watches, and then I was like,
23:48I must admit, I was critiquing you quite heavily, and I was like,
23:51oh, you keep falling over all the time, it's not that hard,
23:53and then I went skating.
23:55LAUGHTER
23:56Really?
23:57I had to have the snowman that you hold and skate really hard.
24:00It's hats off to you, cos that is hard.
24:02It's hard walking on blades.
24:04It really is.
24:05Yes, and that's what skating is.
24:06Yeah, it's hard.
24:08Would you do it?
24:09Would you do the show?
24:10I'd be scared, one, that I smash my teeth,
24:12and two, I slice my fingers off, cos I would be that person.
24:15You're worried about smashing your teeth?
24:16Just take him out.
24:17LAUGHTER
24:19People like him on TV as well.
24:21If you did that as well, it'd be a real, I don't know,
24:22especially cos you're saying you find it difficult.
24:24I think it'd be a bit of a journey.
24:25People would like, people would love that.
24:26Should I start in practice now, do you think?
24:28And pretend I'm really shit, and then...
24:29Yes.
24:30And Scarlet's been paired up with the little snowman.
24:33LAUGHTER
24:39Shall we, um...
24:40Shall we treat ourselves for a little look at Wes in action?
24:43Uh, this is him attempting something called The Headbanger,
24:47and I think he very nearly kills her.
24:49LAUGHTER
24:50All I want is to fly with you
24:54All I want is to fall with you
24:58So just give me love to you
25:02It's not impossible
25:04It's not impossible
25:06So you're just possible
25:10And how do we like the stars
25:13So just give me love to you
25:16And we need to do that
25:18We need to do that
25:20We need to do that
25:25Oh, my God
25:27I mean...
25:28You want me to do that?
25:29Huh?
25:30You want me to do that?
25:31LAUGHTER
25:33Don't worry, Scarlet
25:36If they get a head injury
25:40They get on TV
25:42LAUGHTER
25:44Oh, yeah
25:45She parks where she likes
25:46LAUGHTER
25:48You've got injuries as well, Wes
25:50You were just...
25:51Yeah, I popped the bone out in my hand
25:53during the headbanger
25:54Um...
25:55Fingered back, more like
25:56They should have called it
25:57LAUGHTER
25:58OK, well, I can tell you that Gemma Collins falling over on Dancing on Ice
26:08is not one of the most talked about things
26:09But if you've never seen Dancing on Ice
26:11the show takes 11 celebrities
26:13and Wes
26:14and teaches them to fall over to music
26:16All right, fingers on buzzers
26:17What else do you think is one of the most talked about TV moments of the year?
26:21Theresa May dancing?
26:24Yeah, everybody sort of went...
26:25Oh, does that mean we have to see it again?
26:28I mean, it's pretty...
26:28No, please, no
26:29Oh, give me that
26:30It was like last October
26:31My toes have only just uncurled
26:34It's...
26:35It's so bad
26:36It's like you think, oh, yeah, her dancing is going to be bad
26:39It's worse than you remember
26:41MUSIC PLAYS
26:43MUSIC PLAYS
26:58I know she looks a bit like a thunderbird
27:12There's nothing the matter with looking a bit like a thunderbird
27:18But it is sort of a strange choice to walk out to a band who are famous for winning Eurovision
27:28Yeah
27:29I mean, if anything, she should have been walking out to the Okie Kokie
27:32In, out, in, out
27:41She should get a box with a reach on her, her arms are massive
27:43No
27:44Do you know what?
27:45I bet she'd be really good at putting fake tan on her back
27:48She'll need that, she won't be able to go to Europe on a holiday soon
27:50LAUGHTER
27:57She's got form as well
27:59She's got form, she's got previous on the dancing
28:01Take a look
28:01MUSIC PLAYS
28:03I think it's the worst thing any white person's ever done in Africa
28:21That's what I think
28:23That's what I think
28:27It is kind of like, you know, she's not a great dancer
28:30But I sort of think that's not really the issue
28:32Like, you know, it wouldn't all be fine if like
28:34Oh, she could do a great Paso Doble
28:36Do you know what to me?
28:37Like, you don't say that about any other political leader
28:39Like, say what you like about Robert Mugabe
28:41He is great with a Macarena
28:44I feel a bit sorry for her
28:45Because she's always getting like
28:47The mickey taken out
28:48And then that, that, the whole thing of like
28:49The naughtiest thing you've ever done
28:50She said she'd run for a field of wheat or whatever
28:53And like, but what do you want her to say?
28:54It's like the Prime Minister go
28:55Oh, naughtiest thing I've ever done
28:56Er, got drunk and I sucked off my best mate's husband
29:00Happy now will you vote for me?
29:02Well, she only became leader after every other candidate dropped out
29:07It's like if I became a Victoria Secret model
29:09Because all other women died
29:12Rosie, what did you make of Theresa May's moves?
29:15Oh, I feel sorry for her
29:18Because she's her Prime Minister
29:23We shouldn't be judging her on how she dances
29:30If we wanted a good dancer as PM
29:37We should have like Michael Jackson
29:43And that
29:45That would not be good
29:49I think you make a very good point
29:52That moonwalk it turns out
29:54Everyone loved it in the 80s
29:55It was only sort of developed to sneak in and out of kids' bedrooms
29:57LAUGHTER
30:07APPLAUSE
30:09Let's have a look and see if it's up there
30:11Yes, it's Theresa May dancing on stage during the Conservative Party Conference
30:13party conference to be fair politicians have a history of dancing teresa may at the party
30:17conference anne widdekombe on strictly and tony blair on the graves of iraqi children
30:29i can tell you at the end of that round rob harry and scarlett have one point tom
30:32wes and rosie have two points
30:43welcome back to our 10 cats our next round is pick of the polls rob harry at scarlett what do you like
30:58the look of oh oh you like the look of wes who wouldn't okay we've got a lovely photo of wes with
31:05his top off oh for god's sake and one of eight and uh one of rosie oh no we don't
31:24you've chosen wes here's your related question would you give up drinking for a six-pack yes or no
31:29the thing is i like going on a night out and then say if you get so pissed you forget what you look
31:34like anyway don't you this feels like rock bottom you'll be talking about this in a meeting
31:43television i said you drink so much i forgot what i looked like it was only because there
31:48was a mirror at the back of the phone box
31:55i think i'm uniquely placed to answer this question because i'm in between a very fit young man
32:02and a drunk
32:07you've got a six-pack can i ask tom uh you can ask i mean i don't understand i mean is it sexy lots
32:15of i don't know lots of muscly people i always think it'd be like having sex with a climbing wall
32:19you know you've got some sort of hard lumps to climb up and then someone to abseil down your back
32:24perhaps i don't know i would describe myself as more squidgy perhaps more like a uh stress doll
32:32now what kind of training do you do um a lot of kickboxing and skipping yeah can we have a demo of
32:37your skipping your skipping's extraordinary i've seen a video of this oh my god come on we'll have a
32:40love a little bit skipping it's it's it's what's in it oh you're in the middle there go on
32:45skip there skip for me baby
32:49yeah yeah i mean it's like 700 pounds this time
32:53whoa whoa
32:56nah that couldn't do it
32:57still pretty good
32:59still pretty good rob
33:00do you have a go yeah rob have a go
33:03rob's gonna have a little go
33:04rob's rob will just show you how that's meant to be done yeah yeah
33:08rob just uh it was getting it was basically like i know how to skip
33:12he was just doing a bit of that let me skip
33:14oh oh straight out of the gate rob i mean this boy is built for comedy
33:32there's different techniques um i'm very impressive good anyone else want to have a go
33:36is that the gist of it now because i thought it was skipping like this
33:58oh
34:08stop it jimmy not in front of people
34:13okay so would you give up drinking for a six pack what do you think
34:17um no i don't think people would would they what do you think well um i reckon they keep getting
34:22drunk yeah absolutely yeah well i can tell you 67 of our e4 audience would give up drinking for a six
34:33i already have a six pack in much the same way as i have natural looking hair and all my own teeth
34:40when is your mot
34:41so at the end of that round one point for rob steen two points for tom steen
34:51now before we carry on it's time for a quick bonus round rob tom come and join me for carrot in a box
35:04okay uh the rules of carrot in a box are simple you both have a box uh but only one
35:08box contains a carrot rob in a moment i'm going to ask you to look in your box you'll be able to
35:13see whether you've got a carrot or not tom you want a carrot i want you really want a carrot
35:17all right but there is only one carrot rob if you don't have the carrot then you have to bluff tom
35:22into giving you his box but ultimately tom it's your choice whether you keep your box
35:26or take his box couldn't be easier let's play
35:29go in a box oh my god yeah so i get to look rob gets to look yeah and then you get to decide if
35:37you want to swap boxes oh my goodness rob with those teeth and a carrot there's a carrot in our box
35:44so i'm not stopping i think you're double bluffing robert i don't know what that means but carry on
35:50there's something a little bit crazed in your eye which suggests you're lying and you're not a natural
35:54lie you're quite honest i've really hurt my neck with that one so you say you've got a carrot in
36:01your yeah there's a carrot in that box what does it look like what's it what does it look like it's
36:03orange with a bit of green on it what do you think so your your question is what does the carrot look
36:09like and you're relying on the fact that he might be dumb enough not to know okay it's just an orange
36:14dildo sorry well now he really wants it
36:18is it sort of a short carrot or is it a long carrot don't try and seduce him
36:28it's i'd say an average carrot am i doing this right no you keep on asking about the carrot i don't
36:35know i don't know why you want a description of the carrot so is there a carrot in there you get to
36:40decide do you want that one or that one which box do you want oh i think he's lying i want this one
36:46because look at his eyes he's lying okay well let's find out take a look in your box see if you've
36:52got the cat no i don't want to if you haven't got a carrot you're in trouble oh
37:00okay that means roff you're the winner of car in the box and you win the carrot yes
37:14welcome back to our 10 cats and the winner is is the name of our final round here's your question
37:28the most annoying thing people brag about oh is it that they sort of brag but they don't brag like
37:37people on instagram who put pictures of themselves up with no clothes on well you can completely see
37:41their junk and stuff and they're like oh i'm so shy oh i'll probably take this down later take what
37:46down you've already got anything on and then you think what do you want you know you've already done
37:50the damage we all feel jealous and we all want to wank um a most annoying thing what do you find
37:57annoying scala what do you think i'm going to sound really evil here but like people brag about the
38:01babies you know what i mean and it's like mundane things it's like oh today he lifted up a spoon and
38:08i'm like i do that every day but i don't think about it everyone thinks their kids are a genius it's like
38:14oh tabitha she's only two but she's doing puzzles for four-year-olds she's a genius is she a genius so
38:20does that make you a genius i never saw stephen orkin doing puzzles did you most annoying thing
38:25people brag about what do you find annoying was holidays people brag about holidays yeah being on
38:30they just take instagram pictures of really blue water and really white sand all the time so you find
38:35people's instagram photos of the holidays annoying but you appeared yeah when they say oh take me
38:39take the whole tv show where you were bragging about your holiday i wasn't bragging i was just there
38:46you weren't bragging no is it annoying when people brag about how successful they are and how they run tv
39:01what do you find annoying what do people brag about around your way rob uh it depends where you
39:14are though don't it jimmy like what you're bragging about go on you know because it's like you're in
39:17prison like just getting through tuesday about and i'm wanting to finger up your ass is a good day in it
39:24if you're in prison or a phone box in the north
39:26all right what do you think what do you get annoyed i think what it probably is is everyone
39:33bragging about being a vegan i mean i'm a vegan but i don't tell anyone
39:39keep me quiet yeah so you're vegan now aren't you allergic to vegetables yeah and fruit yeah and nuts
39:48yeah it's it is difficult being vegan uh do you eat herbs uh if they're cooked i'm quite allergic to
39:55that carrot actually oh are you keep that away no don't um okay so most annoying thing people brag
40:02about what do you think people are always bragging about their penis actually i met a bloke who was
40:07like he said to me oh my penis is actually too big i mean women don't do that do they like oh my
40:13vagina's so big i don't know no okay okay well that's uh yeah and yeah news just in it wasn't me
40:27that said the creepiest thing on the show it's actually rosie any other guesses the house prices
40:34that's annoying when people buy a house or something and go oh bought it for 200 grand that's for 400
40:39are you selling it no well it don't matter does it uh okay so let's get some actual answers on this
40:45most annoying thing people brag about um is it money earnings and their job that is exactly right
40:57yes the most annoying thing people brag about is how much money they earn my girlfriend won the lottery
41:02the day she met me well not exactly although she did get five digits and the thunderbolt
41:09no it's talking to me again well that sound tells me it's the end of the round and the end of the
41:18show which means the final scores are it's a dead heat everyone's a winner thanks to all our
41:24our families our wonderful studio audiences to all of you forging at home that's it from us good night
41:40so