Love Is Blind S07 E02
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😹
FunTranscript
00:00:00I don't know if I can do it.
00:00:02¶¶
00:00:10¶¶
00:00:12Taylor has a game.
00:00:14Perfect husband, but he doesn't wear shoes anywhere.
00:00:16Would you marry him?
00:00:18No.
00:00:20No.
00:00:22I would do it.
00:00:24We're like dirty hippies.
00:00:26I would think about it.
00:00:28I can't read, but I can read the bedding for both of us.
00:00:30That's fine.
00:00:32Perfect husband, but...
00:00:34you're his fifth wife.
00:00:36Ooh.
00:00:38He's learned a lot of lessons.
00:00:40Yes, Taylor.
00:00:42How have the marriages ended?
00:00:44In divorce or death?
00:00:46That is the question.
00:00:48Okay, yeah, they all have to be alive.
00:00:50I have boundaries.
00:00:52¶¶
00:01:02It takes a lot for me to really like a guy.
00:01:04And I always...
00:01:06Every guy I fall for, every single time,
00:01:08it was like, oh, the first date,
00:01:10we just had this crazy chemistry.
00:01:12There was so much chemistry.
00:01:14And then I get into it after a few months,
00:01:16and I'm like, we are not compatible.
00:01:18This is like leading with compatibility.
00:01:20I do have a typical type when it comes to men.
00:01:22Like, they're all hot.
00:01:24Ray, you look like a celebrity.
00:01:26Step aside, Nick Lachey.
00:01:28It's the chin.
00:01:30¶¶
00:01:32Arms tend to, like,
00:01:34make me feel a little hot and bothered.
00:01:36There is a pattern there.
00:01:38Everything is outside first.
00:01:40I'm here to, like,
00:01:42not judge a book by its cover.
00:01:44Hello.
00:01:46Who's this?
00:01:48This is Monica.
00:01:50Who's this?
00:01:52It's Steven.
00:01:54It's Steven!
00:01:56I didn't actually ever ask you.
00:01:58When was your last serious relationship?
00:02:00Two, two and a half years ago.
00:02:02How long did you date for?
00:02:04Two years.
00:02:06Two years.
00:02:08I can honestly say it was also my most healthy
00:02:10communicative relationship I've ever been in.
00:02:12I love that.
00:02:14Yeah, I'm huge on communication and emotional intelligence.
00:02:16No, you're not, how I'm feeling.
00:02:18Oh, I love that.
00:02:20Like, we're gonna talk about this problem until we figure it out,
00:02:22whether it's a relationship, a marriage, a job.
00:02:24You have to talk about how you're feeling.
00:02:26When I think about marriage
00:02:28and what I've learned and what I'm looking for,
00:02:30it's like being confident enough to know
00:02:32that, like, it's okay and very normal
00:02:34to have a bad day
00:02:36and wanting someone that's not
00:02:38expecting perfection
00:02:40because it's fucking exhausting.
00:02:42So, can I just tell you this right now?
00:02:44Yeah.
00:02:46I want somebody who's not afraid to be imperfect
00:02:48and who's not afraid to call me out on being imperfect.
00:02:50That's what makes things beautiful.
00:02:52I agree.
00:02:54Here's what I believe.
00:02:56You like someone for their qualities,
00:02:58but you love someone for their flaws.
00:03:00I've always been drawn to
00:03:02flaws.
00:03:04Believe me, girl, I've been the same way.
00:03:06Yeah.
00:03:08Actually, my most recent relationship,
00:03:10since we're already getting into this,
00:03:12I will divulge something that I am not
00:03:14very proud of at all.
00:03:16I wear this brand, and I think
00:03:18it's very important to be honest
00:03:20about it.
00:03:22So, we're going to
00:03:24talk about cheating.
00:03:26I technically
00:03:28hold the title of being a cheater.
00:03:30I've been cheated on multiple times as well.
00:03:32I believed that this
00:03:34person that I was dating at the time,
00:03:36I believed I didn't deserve her.
00:03:38Everyone has a different concept
00:03:40of cheating. One person could be
00:03:42looking at someone.
00:03:44Someone else's could be
00:03:46an actual physical act.
00:03:48I basically slid into
00:03:50a girl's DMs like a dumbass,
00:03:52and we were flirting
00:03:54with intention. You're emotionally
00:03:56cheating at that point.
00:03:58I got caught, which I knew I would.
00:04:00I was very disappointed with myself.
00:04:02I'm so sorry.
00:04:04We went through therapy.
00:04:06We figured it out. I'm actively
00:04:08using therapy to talk about these things.
00:04:10By the way, I really appreciate you sharing
00:04:12with me, and I want you
00:04:14to feel like you can tell me anything.
00:04:16We're all human. I'm
00:04:1836 years old. It's not so
00:04:20black and white.
00:04:22The experiences that I've had
00:04:24to deal with from cheating are
00:04:26...
00:04:28They are really gross
00:04:30and very, very bad.
00:04:32Even in those situations, I've always found
00:04:34a path to forgiveness.
00:04:36This feels so shitty
00:04:38and terrible, but something good
00:04:40will come from it. Look at where you are now.
00:04:42I can tell, even the way you described
00:04:44how upset you were with yourself.
00:04:46I really appreciate it, and I think
00:04:48that you were too hard on yourself.
00:04:50It sucked. Also,
00:04:52I'm going to stop you for a second
00:04:54because I really want to take you on a date
00:04:56tonight. You do?
00:04:58Yes, I do. Thank you
00:05:00for saying that. I want to go on a date
00:05:02with you, too.
00:05:06Great. God, this is going to be hard.
00:05:12I'm in love.
00:05:14What are you feeling?
00:05:16Are you feeling sad because of what you
00:05:18had to do, or are you regretting what you did?
00:05:20I don't know.
00:05:22I think I'm regretting it a little bit.
00:05:24Nick was like, you are my person.
00:05:26I really wanted ... I envisioned you being
00:05:28my wife. You were
00:05:30so freaking special. If you have strong
00:05:32connections with other people,
00:05:34you are going to find someone so special because you're
00:05:36so beautiful inside and out, and I would do anything
00:05:38to be with you, but it's not mutual.
00:05:40What did I meet? He was like,
00:05:42I'm going to leave. He left. He left?
00:05:44Then he was like, I have nothing else to say.
00:05:46I was like, I didn't say anything. I didn't know what to say.
00:05:48I feel like I didn't do it right.
00:05:50Then Brittany came in. She was like, I just got on a date
00:05:52with Leo, and I'm like, I'm going to fucking kill myself.
00:05:54She was already upset because she had just broken up
00:05:56with Nicky.
00:05:58You know what? Nick's going to go home today.
00:06:00You know what the first thing he's going to do? Look us up on Instagram.
00:06:02Facts. Facts. Facts.
00:06:04Sex and mad bitches. He's got nudes in his phone.
00:06:08I'm like, he's fine.
00:06:10I don't even know if Nick is gone, but
00:06:12I already requested a date with him.
00:06:20It's been a really stressful day.
00:06:22I think everyone's had a little
00:06:24emotional meltdown today.
00:06:26What happened? Everyone has learned
00:06:28who's dating who.
00:06:30It was really bad.
00:06:32What?
00:06:34I said your
00:06:36fucking name.
00:06:38Then, apparently,
00:06:40someone else on your list heard that.
00:06:42This was...
00:06:44Right after
00:06:46our date today.
00:06:48Damn.
00:06:50I would never, ever, ever,
00:06:52ever, ever
00:06:54say that. Mostly
00:06:56because I'm so strongly
00:06:58in negative energy and evil eyes
00:07:00and jealousy.
00:07:02I don't want any of that
00:07:04projected onto what I'm
00:07:06doing in here.
00:07:08I'm into evil eyes too.
00:07:12I'm not at all mad at you.
00:07:14You're really honest with me.
00:07:16I really appreciate that.
00:07:18It's kind of inevitable
00:07:20once we get to this point that people will probably
00:07:22start knowing.
00:07:24Yeah.
00:07:26Honestly,
00:07:28I just want to focus on you and I.
00:07:32I have a crush on you.
00:07:36I really do.
00:07:38Oh.
00:07:40Good.
00:07:42Sorry.
00:07:44Maybe I should have went home. I'm kind of in a sad mood.
00:07:46Why?
00:07:48I don't know.
00:07:52It's fine.
00:07:56Brittany,
00:07:58I'm not going to lie.
00:08:00Using the L word is something that's
00:08:02so sacred and scary for me.
00:08:04I'm falling
00:08:06for you so fucking hard.
00:08:08I'm afraid to use it
00:08:10now, but I feel like
00:08:12I'm going to.
00:08:14I'm in the lucky position of
00:08:16oh my god, I have two connections.
00:08:18I'm not trying to
00:08:20say woe is me.
00:08:22It's harder for you.
00:08:24I'll be fine.
00:08:26I'm not going to ever beg
00:08:28someone to be with me.
00:08:30That would just never happen.
00:08:32So it's just your
00:08:34decision to make. It just
00:08:36sucks, but I will
00:08:38either be happy or sad.
00:08:40It's on you there, buddy.
00:08:42I know.
00:08:44I really don't know what to say, Brittany.
00:08:46I'm like never going to forget
00:08:48our date
00:08:50today.
00:08:52Why?
00:08:54What you said was so
00:08:56brave and vulnerable.
00:08:58I love that about you,
00:09:00that you're just so open with me.
00:09:02I want you to feel like you can cry around me
00:09:04and everything.
00:09:06You'll be forever seared into my memory.
00:09:08Forever.
00:09:10What if I
00:09:12just ghosted you?
00:09:14Oh my god. I would fucking be
00:09:16so heartbroken. Good.
00:09:18I want to say, and I really mean
00:09:20this, when I'm with you, you're the only girl.
00:09:22I hate feeling like a player.
00:09:24That's so not what I'm
00:09:26trying to do. But it also doesn't surprise,
00:09:28I knew, I'm telling you, I'm very
00:09:30intuitive. I just
00:09:32already knew
00:09:34and then it was just
00:09:36confirmed today.
00:09:38I already knew, and then knowing your personality,
00:09:40I know
00:09:42you would be
00:09:44with a pros and cons
00:09:46list on each person.
00:09:48I knew you would never just have
00:09:50one. You're right.
00:09:52You're really smart.
00:09:54I'm very smart. You are.
00:09:56You know what? I bet
00:09:58that you,
00:10:00because of
00:10:02your voice and what I
00:10:04feel like your vibe is,
00:10:06I feel like people assume
00:10:08that you're not smart, but I think people
00:10:10very much don't underestimate you. Oh, 100%.
00:10:12Which is kind of a low-key superpower.
00:10:14I feel like that's actually
00:10:16extra smart that you're like, I'm okay with people thinking
00:10:18I'm dumb because now I have an advantage. Yeah.
00:10:20I'll tell you
00:10:22one thing. Before our date today,
00:10:24like,
00:10:26I'll be honest, like,
00:10:28you were
00:10:30like a really, really
00:10:32like, you were number two.
00:10:34And after our date today, like,
00:10:36honest to God, like,
00:10:38you're like,
00:10:40I swear to God, you're like both number one.
00:10:42We're both number one.
00:10:44Yes.
00:10:46I don't know if that makes you feel good or shitty.
00:10:48I don't even know if I should have said that.
00:10:50I guess I can't take it
00:10:52back, but
00:10:54it's true.
00:10:56It's really scary.
00:10:58Like,
00:11:00I,
00:11:02like, I have two connections, and
00:11:04I don't, like, want to be talking
00:11:06about that, but, like, obviously, you know,
00:11:08when you bring that up, like, it's, it is
00:11:10like an elephant in the room, you know, like,
00:11:12I'm not just dating you, you know?
00:11:14Yeah.
00:11:16Like, if someone told me, like,
00:11:18you and me are getting engaged and married
00:11:20tomorrow, I'd, like,
00:11:22I'd be, like, fucking overjoyed.
00:11:24Like, I mean that shit. Like, I could totally
00:11:26see myself, like, being married to you,
00:11:28and, like, being engaged to you, and, like, having
00:11:30such a fucking amazing life,
00:11:32and I'm, like, falling for you,
00:11:34like...
00:11:36But then
00:11:38there's also someone else.
00:11:40I'm fortunate that, like, you know...
00:11:42It's fine.
00:11:44I'm here for you, like, really.
00:11:50I'm, like, holding a pillow,
00:11:52like, pretending it's you.
00:11:56I appreciate that, but...
00:12:00I don't know.
00:12:06Can you see yourself being married to me?
00:12:10Yeah.
00:12:20Fuck. Hang on, let me chill.
00:12:30Fuck.
00:12:32I don't even know what to say, either.
00:12:34I'm just, like, sitting here with my face in my hands,
00:12:36like...
00:12:38I just fucking suck, so, like...
00:12:42I'm, like...
00:12:44You knew this was gonna happen.
00:12:46I know.
00:12:48You just knew this was gonna happen.
00:12:50I know.
00:13:08Oh, God.
00:13:12Hello.
00:13:18Hello.
00:13:24I think I'm going crazy.
00:13:26You and me both.
00:13:28I just want you to know, like,
00:13:30I, like, have not been OK today.
00:13:32Why's that?
00:13:34Because of what I did. Like, I feel like I'm just, like...
00:13:36What you did with us?
00:13:38Yes.
00:13:40You think you made the wrong decision?
00:13:42Of course I did. I'm, like, going insane, I think.
00:13:44Like, I don't know up from down.
00:13:46You made your decision, and it was pretty clear,
00:13:48and you're like, yeah, like, I don't know if this is gonna work.
00:13:50And I get it.
00:13:52Like, you know?
00:13:54You're fantastic, you're gonna be a great wife,
00:13:56you know, to whoever that is,
00:13:58but, um,
00:14:00I was hurt.
00:14:02You know, I felt really hurt.
00:14:04I know you did.
00:14:06I'm sorry.
00:14:08I think I hurt you because I didn't want you to hurt me,
00:14:10which is very selfish.
00:14:12Everyone was like,
00:14:14you gotta end it with someone who you're gonna end it with.
00:14:16You should end it with Nick.
00:14:18And I was like, OK, that's what I'll do.
00:14:20So people were telling you to end it with me?
00:14:22And that's what you listened to?
00:14:26Yeah, kind of.
00:14:28I don't know what I'm doing.
00:14:30I don't know how I feel about anything.
00:14:34You still don't know how you feel about us?
00:14:36I think I'm, like, scared you're gonna, like, be disappointed in me or something.
00:14:38I don't know.
00:14:40You're a very confident person.
00:14:42I'm scared, like, I don't know, like, how confident you are,
00:14:44and so it's gonna make me, like, less confident in myself.
00:14:46I don't know.
00:14:48You know what actually it is?
00:14:50What's that?
00:14:52I think, I don't know why, I just think, like,
00:14:54you will break my fucking heart, I think.
00:14:56Why do you...
00:14:58I don't know, that's a problem, because you say everything right,
00:15:00but I feel like you're gonna really hurt me.
00:15:02Don't say everything right. I'm not perfect.
00:15:04I told you that. I'm not perfect.
00:15:06You feel perfect, I think.
00:15:08You know, maybe I sound confident,
00:15:10but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, too.
00:15:12Like, what if the reveal, you don't like what you see,
00:15:14or, like, what if, like...
00:15:16What if you don't like what you see?
00:15:20I have doubts, too.
00:15:22It goes both ways.
00:15:24I know.
00:15:26It goes both ways.
00:15:28Like, I told you I'm cool with the person you are.
00:15:30Like, that's honestly how I feel.
00:15:36I don't want you.
00:15:38I don't want you really bad.
00:15:40You gotta give me a chance.
00:15:42I know.
00:15:44Like, you gotta give me a chance.
00:15:46Do you still want to continue to talk to me?
00:15:48Yes, that's why I'm here.
00:15:50Well, I'm here.
00:16:04It's getting pretty intense.
00:16:06I'm gonna assume that you know
00:16:08who my other connection is.
00:16:10Yeah, trust me, it was a total accident.
00:16:12She didn't mean to.
00:16:14Inevitably, y'all were gonna find out.
00:16:16I don't know.
00:16:18It's freaking tough, like...
00:16:20Like, I have such a strong connection with you.
00:16:22Yeah.
00:16:24It's like, I'd be lying
00:16:26if I said I didn't also have a really strong connection with her.
00:16:28Yeah.
00:16:30And, like, both of y'all are, like, amazing.
00:16:32And, um...
00:16:34I would think that
00:16:36if I was in this position right now...
00:16:38Yeah?
00:16:40I would be like, oh, man, Leo, look at you.
00:16:42You dog. You play it.
00:16:44I don't feel like that at all.
00:16:46It's tough, because I want to explore both of them to the end.
00:16:48That's what this is for.
00:16:50That's what you're supposed to do,
00:16:52is you're supposed to figure it out.
00:16:54You're really understanding of this.
00:16:56Yeah. We gotta figure out everything about each other
00:16:58if we're gonna potentially get married, you know?
00:17:00I'll never figure out everything about you.
00:17:02That's what excites me the most about you.
00:17:04It's still wild to me, like,
00:17:06that you're on the other side of that wall.
00:17:08I know.
00:17:10And I'm just surprised
00:17:12how well we know each other
00:17:14and haven't seen each other.
00:17:16I know.
00:17:18I truly don't care what you look like.
00:17:20I just want to, like, be with you.
00:17:22You know?
00:17:24Yes. I just want to hang out with you
00:17:26and, like, snuggle you and, like, have sex with you
00:17:28and kiss you and, like, have fun with you
00:17:30and, like, swim with you.
00:17:32You know what I mean?
00:17:34I just want to do things with you.
00:17:36Yeah.
00:17:38It's real, I know.
00:17:40It's exactly what you said.
00:17:42Like, we're twin flames, I think, like, truly.
00:17:44And look at us a little lovey-dovey.
00:17:46I'm excited to see you tomorrow.
00:17:48I'll dream about you.
00:17:50I hope so.
00:17:52Hey, babe.
00:17:54Hello, hello.
00:17:56How are you? Oh, my gosh.
00:17:58Look at this.
00:18:00Look at this.
00:18:02You got me a plant?
00:18:04Yeah.
00:18:06What?
00:18:08It's an avocado.
00:18:10No way. Look at this.
00:18:12I've never grown avocado like this.
00:18:14This is so cool.
00:18:16I'm glad you liked it.
00:18:18I remember, like, on one of our dates,
00:18:20I was, like, wanting, like,
00:18:22plants and, like, trees.
00:18:24It'd be easy to go get, like,
00:18:26some house plant, but I really wanted, like,
00:18:28a plant that's, like,
00:18:30you know, I think more me.
00:18:32I thought it'd be cute, like,
00:18:34in five to seven years, like,
00:18:36that avocados start providing other avocados.
00:18:38And that's, like, the timeline of when I want kids.
00:18:40Um...
00:18:42And so, like, who doesn't like avocados?
00:18:44No one that, like, I trust.
00:18:46This is cool as hell.
00:18:48Okay, I have some honey.
00:18:50Oh, yeah. That is my dad's,
00:18:52Randy's world-famous honey.
00:18:54Oh!
00:18:56Yeah, so that's from his bees from the farm.
00:18:58I use the honey as my secret ingredient
00:19:00for my spicy margaritas.
00:19:02Mm, nice. I want to get one of those.
00:19:04I feel very good about us,
00:19:06so I'm excited to, like, talk more
00:19:08about, like, all the things that we need to talk about.
00:19:10Did you have, like, anything, like,
00:19:12specific you wanted to...
00:19:14Questions? Yeah, sure.
00:19:16I was thinking about, like, this tree
00:19:18providing fruit in, like, five to ten years.
00:19:20That's kind of your timeline for children.
00:19:22Um, five to ten years is a very long time
00:19:24in my head, like, my initial reaction.
00:19:26Uh, I was definitely thinking sooner.
00:19:28I said five to seven. Oh, okay.
00:19:30All right. That's a long time,
00:19:32but it's not a deal-breaker, but I would love
00:19:34to, like, talk to you about compromising there.
00:19:36Yeah, but I don't think it's something
00:19:38that we have to compromise on.
00:19:40I always thought that
00:19:42maybe, like, marriage and, like,
00:19:44doing the whole kids thing was something that
00:19:46I was kind of, like,
00:19:48I would say, like, dragging my feet on
00:19:50because I was worried that it was going to, like,
00:19:52make me
00:19:54rush into some...
00:19:56Like, I had to compromise on time
00:19:58or, like, I had to compromise on, like,
00:20:00my independence in some ways.
00:20:02But, like,
00:20:04I feel like with you
00:20:06it's, like, something
00:20:08that I'm excited about.
00:20:10I feel like I live a great
00:20:12life now. It's not that I can't see
00:20:14it
00:20:16evolving, but, like, I just think
00:20:18you're going to add a lot more meaning to it.
00:20:20I think
00:20:22we're going to
00:20:24together experience
00:20:26things that we kind of always,
00:20:28like, dreamed of. It feels super
00:20:30cliche to, like, say, but it's, like,
00:20:32I actually genuinely mean it.
00:20:36Sounds like a good life.
00:20:38So when are you asking me to be your girlfriend?
00:20:40Taylor,
00:20:42would you
00:20:44be my girlfriend?
00:20:46No. No?
00:20:48You have two hours to convince me.
00:20:54If I haven't convinced you by now,
00:20:56we are in trouble.
00:20:58I'm still
00:21:00a little salty that the movie that
00:21:02makes you think of me is Shrek.
00:21:04We're supposed to be getting engaged
00:21:06and you're, like, you're playing hard to get.
00:21:10Hard to earn, let's be very clear.
00:21:12Very clear.
00:21:14I stand corrected. I don't want to get to the end of this date
00:21:16without you being my girlfriend. I'm not walking out of here without that,
00:21:18so... We're in a situationship
00:21:20right now.
00:21:22It's definitely not
00:21:24friends with benefits, that's for sure.
00:21:26Hear that Nick Lachey?
00:21:28First ever
00:21:30odd situationship.
00:21:34I am really
00:21:36enjoying this, though. I am, too.
00:21:38I really respect you and can see you
00:21:40as, like, my life partner.
00:21:42Babe.
00:21:46What do you think it's going to feel like when you see me
00:21:48for the first time?
00:21:52Well, it's going to be a shock
00:21:54because I have no idea what you look like.
00:21:56I'm probably going to be smiling
00:21:58and cheesing like an idiot.
00:22:00I'm going to probably kiss you
00:22:02right away. I can agree to that.
00:22:04Okay. If I decide to be your girlfriend.
00:22:06Oh, my God.
00:22:08Are you worried about, um...
00:22:10Are you worried about, like,
00:22:12how I look at all? Like, just...
00:22:14Nope.
00:22:16I just really hope that I'm taller than you,
00:22:18honestly. It's...
00:22:20It'll be such a, like, strangely
00:22:22unique experience.
00:22:24If I found you super ugly?
00:22:26No. Well, no. I know. I'm not sure.
00:22:28Yeah, that'll be... I'm kidding.
00:22:30Well, no. It's only
00:22:32concerning because the truth of it is
00:22:34people do care about looks.
00:22:36Like, it just... We do.
00:22:38And especially on the dating apps.
00:22:40Like, it's just all pictures. And when you're talking
00:22:42to one of them, my friends are like, you know,
00:22:44when you talk to them about that person,
00:22:46their first question is, like, let me see a picture.
00:22:48What does she look like? So, I just feel like
00:22:50society, like, trains us to think this way,
00:22:52whether it's, like, right or not.
00:22:54And me, personally, like, I want
00:22:56my partner
00:22:58to find me attractive.
00:23:00Like, that's something I desire. There's a reason why, like,
00:23:02I want to work out. You want them to, like,
00:23:04find you attractive. And some people just
00:23:06chemically, like, it may not be there.
00:23:08This is the whole love is blind question.
00:23:10And so, this is a huge, like,
00:23:12risk for both of us.
00:23:14But I want this with you.
00:23:16I just feel like that's a risk
00:23:18that we are accepting.
00:23:20Also, like, trying to, like,
00:23:22figure out is how the hell
00:23:24I'm gonna ask you to be my girlfriend later.
00:23:28So, what are your favorite kind of flowers?
00:23:30I'm sure I'd love any
00:23:32flower you got me, so I'm not... Oh, you don't have favorites?
00:23:34No, they're sunflowers.
00:23:36Oh. That's why,
00:23:38honestly, I thought of it for real. It's my mom's
00:23:40favorite flowers. I like sunflowers.
00:23:42I guess we haven't said
00:23:44we love each other yet, have we?
00:23:46I've been very much on the
00:23:48cusp here, but
00:23:50I don't know.
00:23:52I'm not sure how I will react if you don't say it back.
00:23:54This is this vulnerability thing again, right?
00:23:56So, I like you a lot, babe.
00:24:00Ah.
00:24:02G? Yeah?
00:24:04It's been okay.
00:24:06Shut up.
00:24:08Can't wait to see you.
00:24:10I can't wait to see you, too.
00:24:12Have a good night. Bye.
00:24:22Hello!
00:24:24Hey, who do we have? Marissa?
00:24:26Marissa! Come on in!
00:24:28Yes!
00:24:30Oh, I love it. I love it.
00:24:32In the real world, people have
00:24:34definitely made judgments about me.
00:24:36I look like a white-bred kid,
00:24:38so they just think, like,
00:24:40I'm probably some frat boy
00:24:42who got a job because his parents
00:24:44did something and had connections.
00:24:46Doesn't necessarily have the depth
00:24:48to them, but that's not the case.
00:24:50I was born in Ukraine.
00:24:52I came to the States very young when I was
00:24:54about two years old.
00:24:56My biological father passed away
00:24:58shortly thereafter, and my dad
00:25:00who raised me is Filipino.
00:25:02He is my hero. He's the
00:25:04inspiration for who I try to be
00:25:06as a person. I'm like an
00:25:08onion. I have a lot of layers to me, so to just
00:25:10judge off one layer, I think, is
00:25:12ridiculous. Oh, my goodness! How's it going?
00:25:14Really looking forward to this conversation.
00:25:16I had an incredible time with you
00:25:18last night. Yeah! Me, too!
00:25:20Obviously, during the day.
00:25:22I read for a little bit and then went to bed.
00:25:24Wait!
00:25:26I was literally about to say, I read
00:25:28for a little bit and then I went to bed.
00:25:30What are you reading? I'm reading, like,
00:25:32this kind of nerdy
00:25:34book. It's like a fantasy
00:25:36thing. Did we talk about this?
00:25:38No. I read fantasy. That's all I read.
00:25:40Oh, really? So have you read, like,
00:25:42Lord of the Rings? Yeah. Okay.
00:25:44I have a Harry Potter tattoo. Do you read Harry Potter?
00:25:46Okay, I love that you have
00:25:48Harry Potter. Yeah, I've read all of them, of course.
00:25:50I want to, like, escape into these worlds.
00:25:52Okay, wow, okay.
00:25:54If you went to a party with friends,
00:25:56what's your go-to party story?
00:25:58And if you want, I can go first. Okay, I want you
00:26:00to go first. No problem, okay.
00:26:02In 2010, I was in the Marine Corps
00:26:04and we were in Kuwait.
00:26:06And we were doing, like, this
00:26:08training thing in the middle of the desert
00:26:10for, like, 30 to 40 days.
00:26:12We were sleeping, like, underneath the stars in tents
00:26:14and stuff. You can't see anything, just desert everywhere.
00:26:16And we see, like, a ton of camels
00:26:18on the horizon, like, hundreds of them.
00:26:20I'm in the middle of the desert, like, I want some cool
00:26:22camel pictures. Okay.
00:26:24And one of my friends, like,
00:26:26he was, like, super nervous about it. He's like,
00:26:28no, dude, no. He's like, oh, like, they're dangerous.
00:26:30Like, what's dangerous about a camel? He's gonna spit
00:26:32on me? Like, that's just a funny story. Who cares?
00:26:34Of course, I pick out the biggest one
00:26:36and I walk towards that one. It's, like,
00:26:38hump was probably at, like, eight, nine feet.
00:26:40Yeah, it was literally the biggest
00:26:42camel I could see. And I
00:26:44bring out my camera, take a picture of it,
00:26:46and I look up from my camera
00:26:48and, uh, the camel is staring
00:26:50at me in my eyes. Oh.
00:26:52I make solid eye contact with it.
00:26:54And I don't want to break eye contact.
00:26:56If I break it now, then I'm, like...
00:26:58You're the weak one. Right. So,
00:27:00it takes a step forward
00:27:02and I take a step back.
00:27:04It takes another step forward and
00:27:06it starts, like, hissing. Just demonic
00:27:08sounds is, like, the best way I can describe it.
00:27:10And it just starts running.
00:27:12And, of course, I turn around and I just run as fast as I can.
00:27:14The next thing I know,
00:27:16I feel something hit me in the back
00:27:18of my head.
00:27:20And I fall face down.
00:27:22I immediately, like, roll over and look up.
00:27:24And the camel's on its hind legs
00:27:26with its front legs up in the air
00:27:28coming down on me. Oh, my God.
00:27:30Like, literally trying to stomp me out.
00:27:32And I'm thinking, oh, fuck. I'm
00:27:34dead. I'm in the Marine Corps
00:27:36during two wars
00:27:38and my mom's gonna get a letter or a phone
00:27:40call that I died from a fucking camel.
00:27:42I swear I could feel, like, the vibration of its
00:27:44hooves. That's how close it was. Oh.
00:27:46And then just huffs and, like, makes crazy
00:27:48sounds and, like, leaves us alone.
00:27:50But, like, for the rest of the time, like, I was
00:27:52just like, holy shit, that's what it feels like to know you're gonna
00:27:54die. Like, for sure. You were gonna die.
00:27:56Yeah, for sure. Yeah.
00:27:58And I didn't feel that way again until
00:28:00Ukraine where, like, I also felt like
00:28:02I was gonna die. And, like, it's exact
00:28:04same feeling. Can you tell me a little bit about your, like,
00:28:06Ukraine story?
00:28:08Sure.
00:28:10When the war in Ukraine started, if you remember,
00:28:12I said I was born there. I, like, knew.
00:28:14I was like, I have to go. And so
00:28:16I told my workers, like, hey, I'm leaving.
00:28:18Like, I'm going to Ukraine.
00:28:20My whole thing was
00:28:22I am Ukrainian.
00:28:24I have a Ukrainian family. I don't have
00:28:26a wife or kids. I have a military background. Like,
00:28:28who else should go help but me?
00:28:30So, uh, my work was
00:28:32phenomenal. They, like,
00:28:34said, don't quit.
00:28:36If you need to take time to do anything you need to do,
00:28:38go do it. I had friends
00:28:40come in and help me get ready for it.
00:28:42My work ended up raising a bunch of money
00:28:44for me and, like, paid for all my gear and stuff.
00:28:46My parents, I thought it was gonna be, like,
00:28:48the toughest phone call I made.
00:28:50Um,
00:28:52they said,
00:28:54like, we were just waiting for you to call us.
00:28:56Like,
00:28:58we knew you were gonna do this. And I, I
00:29:02I was, like, very honored to
00:29:04that they would think so highly
00:29:06Yeah.
00:29:08of me, that they
00:29:10Alright, give me a second.
00:29:12Okay, now take your time.
00:29:14It was, like, it really, like, touched me that
00:29:16they would
00:29:18think that, um
00:29:22how many people helped me that I just
00:29:24didn't feel like I
00:29:26deserved
00:29:30You did deserve.
00:29:32I deserved that.
00:29:34You deserved all the support. I mean, like,
00:29:36that's a huge deal.
00:29:38First of all, it's, like, it's terrifying.
00:29:40I mean, it was, yeah, it was for sure scary.
00:29:42Um, a million percent.
00:29:44And then being my age, I think I was 33
00:29:46when I left, like, I knew what I was, like
00:29:48I wasn't going in there thinking, like,
00:29:50oh, I'm gonna be Rambo, I'm gonna win this war.
00:29:52I knew it was, like, this is a super shitty situation.
00:29:54But, like, all I could think about was, like,
00:29:56there's 19-year-old kids or
00:29:58maybe even younger kids
00:30:00who, like, have no training and they're
00:30:02being
00:30:04It was, yeah, it was a no-brainer.
00:30:06Like, I knew I had a choice.
00:30:08I didn't have to go, but internally
00:30:10I had no choice.
00:30:18You know, obviously, as someone who was in the military,
00:30:20like, I understand, like, the honor
00:30:22the commitment, the integrity, and I think
00:30:24you obviously have very good people
00:30:26in your life who
00:30:28clearly love you and support you because you're, like,
00:30:30you seem to be, like, a really good person.
00:30:34Sorry.
00:30:38Um, okay.
00:30:40What's your party story?
00:30:42I don't know, how am I supposed to follow that up?
00:30:44Something light-hearted, hopefully?
00:30:46Okay.
00:30:48Try and think of one that's, like, not stupid.
00:30:50It can be stupid, that's fine.
00:30:52No, I don't want you to know anything stupid.
00:30:54Oh, why not, Marissa?
00:30:56Because I don't want you to think I'm stupid.
00:30:58You're in law school.
00:31:00Okay, I have homework.
00:31:02I'm gonna come back, and I'm gonna tell you
00:31:04a good story, like your camel story.
00:31:06But it's gonna be mine.
00:31:08I'm writing down H-W.
00:31:10Oh, God.
00:31:12What are you, my professor?
00:31:14Alright, homework.
00:31:16Okay, we'll talk tomorrow for sure, 100%?
00:31:18100%.
00:31:20Bye.
00:31:22Woo!
00:31:24Woo!
00:31:30I haven't had this much excitement,
00:31:32like, dating and getting to know people
00:31:34in a long-ass time.
00:31:36Yeah.
00:31:38And ready to, like, you know, find, like, love.
00:31:40Which I was very skeptical until here we are.
00:31:42Damn, bro.
00:31:44Just, like, can't, like, stop debating in my head.
00:31:46Bro, I can't even sleep.
00:31:48Like, I close my eyes at night,
00:31:50and all my dreams are, like, of being in here,
00:31:52like, on dates or, like, yeah.
00:31:54I just want to get on another date.
00:31:56I want to see what happens.
00:31:58When we, like, start winding down,
00:32:00there's gonna be, like, girls who are maybe, like,
00:32:02stuck between two guys.
00:32:04Somebody's gonna leave here heartbroken.
00:32:06You know what I'm saying?
00:32:08Like, that would be tough, man.
00:32:10Yeah.
00:32:22Hello.
00:32:24Hello.
00:32:26Ooh.
00:32:28Mi vida, mi cielo.
00:32:30It's Marissa, right?
00:32:32Show is...
00:32:34Showing up is, girl.
00:32:36How's your night?
00:32:38It's good. I was actually doing push-ups.
00:32:40Push-ups?
00:32:42Yeah.
00:32:44My God.
00:32:46We were out there doing a little workout, so...
00:32:48Of course y'all were.
00:32:50So, yeah, I did some push-ups,
00:32:52and I'm, like, wide awake, honestly.
00:32:54I was like, I'll talk to him about anything.
00:32:56Let me think. Aw, I'm glad you feel comfortable with me.
00:32:58Yeah, I do. I feel comfortable, so...
00:33:00I know, like, we're at a point now
00:33:02where it's, like, we're starting to, like, dwindle down
00:33:04in terms of, like, our choices.
00:33:06Yeah, we're whittling it down.
00:33:08Like, there's still more time left in this,
00:33:10but I just wanted to let you know
00:33:12that I think about you a lot,
00:33:14and you've been, like,
00:33:16probably, like, my top one for, like, a while now.
00:33:20Where's your head at?
00:33:22I was very excited to talk to you.
00:33:24Um, and, yeah, obviously, I'm being open
00:33:26with other connections as well, and, like...
00:33:28Of course, yeah.
00:33:30But I would say there's only two of you guys
00:33:32that I'm connecting with.
00:33:34Connecting with, yeah.
00:33:36But it's kind of scary to think that, like,
00:33:38let's say we're connecting with two people,
00:33:40and then, like, you have to pick...
00:33:42You have to pick one, right?
00:33:44Yeah.
00:33:46I have a feeling I might end up in a love triangle.
00:33:48Oh, God.
00:33:50There's gonna be probably, like, two guys after you.
00:33:52Oh, I don't know. I don't know.
00:33:54And I told myself coming in, like, I wouldn't really care
00:33:56if someone else was, like, feeling someone else feeling.
00:33:58Yeah.
00:34:00I still don't, like, I wouldn't care,
00:34:02because at the end of the day, like,
00:34:04if we both like the same person,
00:34:06it's up to, you know, that person to decide for themselves,
00:34:08like, what they want and what works best for them.
00:34:10Yeah.
00:34:12I told you I was previously married, right?
00:34:14Yeah.
00:34:16She was, like, my high school sweetheart.
00:34:18And I was just moving away from Christianity
00:34:20and, like, just, like, religion in general,
00:34:22and we tried to figure things out,
00:34:24but ultimately it didn't work out for us, and so...
00:34:26Do you still talk to your ex?
00:34:28No.
00:34:30I can be so empathetic, but then, like, with myself,
00:34:32like, I'm just, like, terrible
00:34:34in terms of, like, how I critique myself.
00:34:36Okay.
00:34:38Like, I never feel like it's enough,
00:34:40and I think, like, it comes from, like,
00:34:42my dad was just, like, very critical.
00:34:44I felt like whatever I did was never good enough for him.
00:34:46Yeah.
00:34:48And so, like, I think that, like,
00:34:50that's how I moved into, like, my adulthood.
00:34:52Yeah.
00:34:54When my parents divorced,
00:34:56my dad, like, left and didn't help at all,
00:34:58and it was just my mom with us four kids,
00:35:00and so we were, like, on welfare
00:35:02and really poor for a couple years.
00:35:04I had a lot of people come into my life
00:35:06that were really helpful
00:35:08in shaping how I view the world
00:35:10and, like, introducing me to experiences
00:35:12that I don't think people
00:35:14have, like, experienced.
00:35:16Something as simple as, like,
00:35:18I had a volleyball coach,
00:35:20and they, like, took me down to, like, Disney.
00:35:22Like, I know it sounds so silly.
00:35:24No, that's, like, incredible.
00:35:26And that really, really, really
00:35:28makes me, like, really grateful I'm a giver.
00:35:30Like, I give back.
00:35:32I give to homeless people.
00:35:34I know some people don't like that. I give.
00:35:36One thing I'm just, like, really grateful for
00:35:38is sort of, like, my real, like,
00:35:40close-knit, like, group of friends.
00:35:42They're pretty much like family to me,
00:35:44and, like, they've really, like,
00:35:46been, like, great examples of, like,
00:35:48healthy, like, masculinity for me
00:35:50and, like, what it looks like
00:35:52to be a fucking good-ass guy
00:35:54and, like, express your emotions
00:35:56and be in touch with who you are
00:35:58and not have to worry about
00:36:00what anyone else thinks about me
00:36:02or, like, what, you know, conclusions
00:36:04they want to arrive at.
00:36:06I feel like men have, like,
00:36:08such a wild, like, expectations placed on them
00:36:10in society, and I'm just, like, really grateful
00:36:12that I have that example.
00:36:14Wow, you sound like you have a great, like, group of friends.
00:36:16Yeah.
00:36:18Something I will say about you that I find so attractive
00:36:20is how comfortable you are
00:36:22talking about gender roles,
00:36:24how there is the toxic masculinity
00:36:26and how, like, you lean away from that.
00:36:28I think that's, like, so attractive.
00:36:30Yeah, like, I just don't really care
00:36:32to, like, try to follow traditional expectations
00:36:34of what, like, masculinity should look like.
00:36:36It's, like, masculinity is, like, what I make it.
00:36:38I absolutely love that
00:36:40more than you might realize.
00:36:42Because I'm used to
00:36:44military masculinity.
00:36:46Got you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That makes sense.
00:36:48Which is interesting because it's still something that I,
00:36:50like, I'm obviously still attracted to
00:36:52because I've dated them.
00:36:54So, like, what is your type, typically?
00:36:56I don't have, like, a physical type.
00:36:58So, what if I am, like, 5'5", 5'6"?
00:37:00That's fine.
00:37:02That's fine. Really?
00:37:04I'm not going to freaking say no to some guy
00:37:06tonight. Okay. No, no.
00:37:08I was just, like, curious.
00:37:10I never really cared much about the physical.
00:37:12I'm more, like, how they make me feel
00:37:14and how I get along with them.
00:37:16And I usually date guys who are, like, pretty smart.
00:37:18I dated, like, a conservative Trump supporter for three years.
00:37:20Oh, shit.
00:37:22But then I dated, like, a progressive liberal guy.
00:37:24Like, it's just, I date people for who they are.
00:37:26Let's say you get proposed to. Let's say I propose to you.
00:37:28But, like...
00:37:30Oh, my God.
00:37:32I need more time.
00:37:34Um...
00:37:36We'll let it be, like, a little slow burn.
00:37:38Not too slow, though.
00:37:46I feel like with Garrett,
00:37:48we keep using the word, like, serendipitous.
00:37:50It's just, like, a magnetic feeling
00:37:52that, like, you can't really describe.
00:37:54Taylor.
00:37:56If I had a script...
00:37:58Oh...
00:38:00laughs
00:38:02Are those yours?
00:38:04How do you know?
00:38:06Because they're my favorite flower.
00:38:08I told him, like, if you want me to ask you to be your girlfriend.
00:38:10Oh, yeah, you did say that.
00:38:12You told him to do something for you.
00:38:14Look at him actually listening.
00:38:16laughs
00:38:20Taylor Morgan Grouse, since we first met in Pod 2.
00:38:22And we've just...
00:38:24Of course he knows what Pods are.
00:38:26Of course.
00:38:28Of course.
00:38:30We've been dating for months.
00:38:32We continue to do this on our own unique way.
00:38:34And I can't wait to continue on this journey with you.
00:38:36Your poo thing.
00:38:38Garrett.
00:38:40Will you be my girlfriend?
00:38:42Check yes or no.
00:38:44It's so sweet.
00:38:48Maybe.
00:38:50Let me get your pen.
00:38:52Put him out of his misery.
00:38:54Okay, okay.
00:38:56Garrett really surprises me.
00:38:58This is so incredibly sweet.
00:39:00So thoughtful.
00:39:02He gets me, like, all giddy.
00:39:04And I think we're definitely not just friends.
00:39:06laughs
00:39:08I feel like he wants me to follow instructions.
00:39:10Really, really, really, really sweet.
00:39:12It's amazing.
00:39:14Oh.
00:39:16Yeah.
00:39:18It's also...
00:39:20Ooh.
00:39:22Is that lip gloss?
00:39:24It's perfume.
00:39:26Perfume.
00:39:28Hermone Unisex Perfume Oil.
00:39:30You dirty, dirty dog.
00:39:32laughs
00:39:34I told you I always come prepared.
00:39:36Yeah, you do. You have all the things.
00:39:38All the things.
00:39:40Hello.
00:39:42Yay.
00:39:44Oh, yay.
00:39:46Oh, my God, I'm so excited to talk to you.
00:39:48Yeah, me too.
00:39:50I told you I look forward to talking to you every time.
00:39:52Yeah.
00:39:54Did you apply to Norfolk State?
00:39:56Like, why you applied there?
00:39:58And, like, only applied there?
00:40:00I wanted to go to Norfolk State literally to be in a band.
00:40:02I grew up singing a lot in church
00:40:04because my mom made me.
00:40:06But also, like, me and my sisters
00:40:08played a lot of instruments.
00:40:10My middle sister was a wonderful singer
00:40:12and a wonderful songwriter.
00:40:14We had pianos in the house.
00:40:16I played horns, my sister played the trumpet.
00:40:18I went there on a music scholarship,
00:40:20but like college, it felt very directionless.
00:40:22I was not the honor roll student,
00:40:24but funny enough, I always tested really high.
00:40:26Yeah.
00:40:28I've always looked at, like,
00:40:30just this education system
00:40:32and, like, my education experience
00:40:34with a little bit of spite
00:40:36because I remember what it felt like to feel stupid.
00:40:38Yeah.
00:40:40Always hated school, but I love learning.
00:40:42And I ended up joining the Navy,
00:40:44which I think I have told you, right?
00:40:46Yes.
00:40:48Okay, to this day, joining the Navy
00:40:50and getting out was the second best.
00:40:52Though I love the Navy
00:40:54and the things they gave to me,
00:40:56I assume that that's all I ever could be.
00:40:58Since then, been in a lot of rooms
00:41:00and at a lot of tables
00:41:02that I would have never imagined myself in
00:41:04and, like, looked a lot of people in the eyes
00:41:06that at certain points in my life and career
00:41:08didn't even feel like real people to me
00:41:10because, like, they were so out of reach.
00:41:12And, like, I don't know where I'm going from here,
00:41:14but there's nothing that I can't do
00:41:16and there's nobody I can't look in the eye.
00:41:18My grandfather...
00:41:20Are you familiar with, like, the Nation of Islam?
00:41:22Absolutely.
00:41:24He was the national secretary for the Nation of Islam.
00:41:26Oh, okay.
00:41:28And he was very close and worked with Elijah Muhammad.
00:41:30Mm-hmm.
00:41:32And there's, like, a photo in my dad's house
00:41:34of, like, him and Muhammad Ali.
00:41:36Muhammad Ali's, like, one of my heroes.
00:41:38Really?
00:41:40Yes, I have four photos of Muhammad Ali in my house.
00:41:42Wow.
00:41:44My grandfather, he was really big on not going to college,
00:41:46but I did it because my parents were like,
00:41:48hey, you get the grades, you go to college.
00:41:50But when it was time for me to go,
00:41:52there was no money.
00:41:54And I'm like, all four people getting an education.
00:41:56Like...
00:41:58Yeah.
00:42:00But don't also think that you have to do it to be successful.
00:42:02You were talking about the Nation of Islam thing.
00:42:04Yeah.
00:42:06And talking about the Navy.
00:42:08On one of my very last deployments,
00:42:10I remember I was in the Atlantic Ocean
00:42:12on my way from Norfolk, Virginia, to Senegal.
00:42:14First time I ever touched the continent of Africa.
00:42:16Mm-hmm.
00:42:18And I happened to have been reading
00:42:20the autobiography of Malcolm X.
00:42:22Yeah.
00:42:24And it, like, struck me where I first started thinking,
00:42:26like, yo, I could do and be more.
00:42:28Yeah, I wasn't raised Muslim.
00:42:30My dad grew up Catholic,
00:42:32but then his dad, you know, was part of the nation.
00:42:34So I remember one time I asked him,
00:42:36I was like, what is your religion?
00:42:38He's like, I just believe in God.
00:42:40See, I love that just because if you take a look
00:42:42at the history of religion,
00:42:44you'll find a lot of common themes about love.
00:42:46Absolutely.
00:42:48So I would like to tell you more about me.
00:42:50Yeah.
00:42:52And, like, my family story.
00:42:54Yeah.
00:42:56For me, it's, like, oddly personal,
00:42:58particularly with my sisters,
00:43:00because, like, whatever children I have
00:43:02will never know their aunts.
00:43:04Mm-hmm.
00:43:06So I want to be able to be like,
00:43:08this is what your aunt was like.
00:43:10But I'll never forget the night my oldest sister died.
00:43:12You never told me exactly what happened.
00:43:14Uh, she had lupus.
00:43:16One day she checked in the hospital
00:43:18and never checked out.
00:43:20I remember I was at my grandmother's house,
00:43:22and, like, I was waiting on my parents.
00:43:24I knew she was at the hospital,
00:43:26and then my grandmother told me
00:43:28that one of my cousins was gonna pick me up.
00:43:30And I got to the hospital, I saw tears in my dad's eyes,
00:43:32and that was my first sign of, like,
00:43:34uh, oh, something's wrong.
00:43:36Yeah.
00:43:38What I always remember from that night
00:43:40is knowing that she was gone
00:43:42before anybody told me,
00:43:44because I heard my mother make a noise
00:43:46that I've never heard her make again.
00:43:48It was primal and animalistic,
00:43:50like, and that's my mother, you know?
00:43:52Like, it was almost out of body.
00:43:54Yeah.
00:43:56After she passed, like, me and my other sister
00:43:58were in there with her alone,
00:44:00and she had her class ring on,
00:44:02and my other sister was, like,
00:44:04trying to tug her class ring off her finger,
00:44:06and I remember, like, like, I was like,
00:44:08Dorian, can you do that? Come on, don't do that.
00:44:10You know, it was a lot going on,
00:44:12but I remember, like, but, like, I'm glad she did it.
00:44:14Like, I'm glad I have that memory,
00:44:16because, like, I'm literally wearing
00:44:18that ring around my neck right now.
00:44:20Really?
00:44:22Yeah, I wear both of my sister's
00:44:24high school class rings on my necklace.
00:44:26I feel
00:44:28Like the world is falling down on me
00:44:32But my most cherished memories
00:44:34are the exact opposite,
00:44:36to where up to that point,
00:44:38most of my life was like a sitcom.
00:44:40Finding comfort in a dream
00:44:46Like, my parents, like,
00:44:48they did, like, I could not have asked
00:44:50more from them.
00:44:52Like, if you look at photos of us,
00:44:54it don't even look real.
00:44:56Like, it was just so beautiful and innocent.
00:44:58Like, I wouldn't change a thing.
00:45:00Like, just stupid brother-sister shit, like.
00:45:02Yeah.
00:45:04I think about,
00:45:06it's funny, like, I think about,
00:45:08like, my sisters used to, like,
00:45:10lock me out the house in my underwear.
00:45:12I know
00:45:16There are things I can't explain
00:45:22Just a beautiful childhood, man.
00:45:24Yeah.
00:45:26It really was, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.
00:45:28Yeah.
00:45:30Um, thank you for sharing.
00:45:32Yeah, thank you for listening.
00:45:38I'm gonna say something to you
00:45:40that I have been thinking,
00:45:42but I have not said out loud to anyone.
00:45:44What?
00:45:46I get to give my parents
00:45:48one more daughter.
00:45:50And I love that.
00:45:52I love that so much.
00:45:54And I can already see our lives
00:45:56coming together in a lot of ways.
00:45:58I don't take it lightly
00:46:00how close I feel to you
00:46:02and how grateful I am to have met you,
00:46:04even though we've never met.
00:46:06And, like, honestly,
00:46:08that's beautiful.
00:46:18Hey, baby.
00:46:20Hello. More flowers for my boyfriend?
00:46:22Oh.
00:46:24I have some things that I'd like to say.
00:46:26Okay.
00:46:28What do you see in front of you?
00:46:30I have a ton of notes.
00:46:32Um, I'm kind of nervous.
00:46:34I can't tell.
00:46:36I'm gonna start reading.
00:46:38Well, gee.
00:46:40I've always considered myself
00:46:42great with words,
00:46:44but it's clear with you I need my notes.
00:46:48I thought I was cute and kind of cheesy.
00:46:50My dad gave me my grandparents' love letters.
00:46:52But last night,
00:46:54I found this one letter my grandparents wrote
00:46:56on November 13, 1953.
00:47:00They're no longer...
00:47:02here.
00:47:04But they are kind of here.
00:47:06Here it goes.
00:47:08Doing great, babe.
00:47:10Dear Kathleen,
00:47:12I certainly didn't mean to say
00:47:14or write things
00:47:16that would make you speechless.
00:47:18Um...
00:47:22All I wanted to do was tell you
00:47:24what I've been thinking about
00:47:26and hoping and praying for.
00:47:30I just can't imagine that what I would have to say
00:47:32would make anyone speechless.
00:47:34I'm very flattered
00:47:36that you should think that my letters are so nice.
00:47:38I don't want you to leave you
00:47:40so speechless that you can't say yes.
00:47:44That would indeed be very bad.
00:47:46I also am very happy
00:47:48if my letters do make you feel good and happy.
00:47:50At least they are doing in a small way
00:47:52what I would very much like to do myself personally.
00:47:54I hope they convey
00:47:56my deep and sincere feeling toward you.
00:48:00As far as to what you can say,
00:48:02I would be perfectly happy
00:48:04just to have you say that you would marry me.
00:48:06Of course I realize
00:48:08that that is asking for a great deal from you.
00:48:10But I assure you that I would spend
00:48:12the rest of my life trying to show you
00:48:14that this is what I really want.
00:48:18So really all you have to say is yes.
00:48:20It would be much better
00:48:22of course if you were here
00:48:24so that you didn't have to write.
00:48:26I think that it should be obvious
00:48:28to you by now that this is my intention.
00:48:30That is to have you here
00:48:32with me as my wife.
00:48:34Um.
00:48:36So gee.
00:48:38We started this experiment
00:48:40inherently very skeptical
00:48:42but discovered we're excited
00:48:44to problem solve this uncertainty together
00:48:46on our own time
00:48:48and pace.
00:48:50Some might even say velocity.
00:48:52Shout out Heisenberg.
00:48:58Um.
00:49:00So gee.
00:49:02You've really been
00:49:04the perfect husband.
00:49:06I've been looking for
00:49:08with all the words of affirmation
00:49:10I didn't know I needed.
00:49:12So thank you for being vulnerable
00:49:14and persistent with me.
00:49:16Our connection is magnetic.
00:49:18You've been my number one for nine days running
00:49:20and I can't wait to lose count for the rest.
00:49:26Hello.
00:49:28Sorry.
00:49:30Sorry.
00:49:32Everything's running through me right now.
00:49:34Yeah.
00:49:36This is um.
00:49:38These letters are incredible too.
00:49:40They're pretty cool, huh?
00:49:42It's beautiful. Honestly, it's so, so cool.
00:49:44It's just tough to
00:49:46form words right now.
00:49:50I know we would have done all the things
00:49:52that we wanted to do
00:49:54but it's going to be
00:49:56so much more than we could have imagined
00:49:58and I'm so excited.
00:50:04Yeah.
00:50:06I was a mess for the first like three days.
00:50:08I didn't know what to do. I'm trying to follow my heart
00:50:10and I hadn't done it in so long
00:50:12and it was tough.
00:50:14But that fire started with us
00:50:16and it just started to grow and grow
00:50:18and there's nothing else I could think about.
00:50:20I mean, I knew the answer was there all along.
00:50:22I wasn't coming in here
00:50:24expecting or
00:50:26really even hoping.
00:50:28I didn't expect it at all
00:50:30and you weren't in here
00:50:32dying to just get engaged
00:50:34with anyone.
00:50:36You were looking for me.
00:50:40When it comes to you, Garrett,
00:50:42I really think we could have it all
00:50:44and I didn't think
00:50:46that was possible before coming in here.
00:50:50Taylor,
00:50:52I
00:50:54love everything about you.
00:50:56I think you're an incredible person.
00:50:58I think you're intelligent.
00:51:00You're very caring,
00:51:02kind, you're authentic,
00:51:04you're passionate.
00:51:08I'm just, in here,
00:51:10I've fallen in love with the person that you are.
00:51:12I've fallen in love
00:51:14with all your little quirks.
00:51:16I'm looking forward to seeing more of them.
00:51:18I love finding out things about you that you're not even telling me,
00:51:20just picking up on them
00:51:22and pulling back these layers.
00:51:24I'm loving the person that's underneath.
00:51:26It's been an incredible experience
00:51:28just getting to know you.
00:51:30Our connection too, you talked about it,
00:51:32the magnetic feeling, it's crazy.
00:51:34It's electric.
00:51:36It's a very visceral experience.
00:51:38It's like every molecule of me
00:51:40just wants to come through this wall
00:51:42and to be with you.
00:51:44Our bodies are telling us
00:51:46that we're meant to be together
00:51:48and we just have to make sure
00:51:50that we are.
00:51:52Taylor Morgan Krause?
00:52:02Will you marry me?
00:52:08Absolutely.
00:52:14Oh my God.
00:52:16Oh my God, I'm shaking.
00:52:18I can't even get up right now.
00:52:24I'm so freaking excited.
00:52:30Just gotta soak this in.
00:52:34This is not how I imagined it,
00:52:36but honestly, it's like the most amazing
00:52:38feeling in the world.
00:52:40We're very, very, very lucky.
00:52:42Yeah, we are.
00:52:44I can't wait to see you.
00:52:46I'm wearing blue tomorrow.
00:52:48Blue?
00:52:50I am. Just a heads up.
00:52:52I'm not going to tell you what I'm wearing.
00:52:54You'll be just as confused and lost as I am.
00:52:58Equally as excited.
00:53:00I'll see you soon.
00:53:02See you soon, babe.
00:53:06Wow.
00:53:10This is awesome.
00:53:16Woo!
00:53:26Are you a fiancé?
00:53:28I'm a fiancé.
00:53:30He's really taken me being a plant mom
00:53:32to the entire next level.
00:53:38Oh my God, dude.
00:53:40This is wild, son.
00:53:42Yeah.
00:53:44Y'all next.
00:53:48Dude, what?
00:53:50What? I'm engaged?
00:53:52I'm engaged!
00:54:00How do I ask this? I don't even know what I really want to ask.
00:54:02But like, okay, let's start with this.
00:54:06Did you vote in the last presidential election
00:54:08and for the election before that?
00:54:10Yes, I did.
00:54:12Both as a veteran and an American,
00:54:14it's kind of my responsibility to do so.
00:54:16Thank you again for your service.
00:54:18I don't know if I've had a chance to say that.
00:54:20Yeah, you have. You don't have to do it anymore.
00:54:22I get it. Thank you.
00:54:24I really mean it, though. I'm super grateful for people like you.
00:54:28Whether I liked the candidates or not
00:54:30is a different story.
00:54:32But I did vote.
00:54:34And it was rough.
00:54:36I voted for both the last election
00:54:38and this election.
00:54:40Because, I mean, since we're already on this topic.
00:54:42Like, my dad is a Republican.
00:54:44He'll vote Republican because he's a Republican.
00:54:46And I don't agree with that concept.
00:54:48It's always mind-blowing to me when people
00:54:50aren't okay with changing their mind.
00:54:52Because that says a lot about them.
00:54:54Yeah. I agree.
00:54:56I'm very much a centrist.
00:54:58I want to vote for my candidate
00:55:00because I believe in what they're selling.
00:55:02I'll be completely honest.
00:55:04I voted for Donald Trump
00:55:06because I didn't like Hillary
00:55:08in the first election.
00:55:10But I despise the way that Trump
00:55:12handled his time in office.
00:55:14And I voted for Biden.
00:55:16And I can honestly say
00:55:18I definitely put a lot more thought
00:55:20and passion into that second vote
00:55:22than I did the first.
00:55:24And I will happily admit that my first vote
00:55:26wasn't the most educated vote.
00:55:30You know, I'm...
00:55:32This is actually a little interesting.
00:55:34Tell me.
00:55:36For the most part, I identify as white.
00:55:38But my dad...
00:55:40So this is an interesting story.
00:55:42My...
00:55:44For years, on my dad's side,
00:55:46my grandmother on my dad's side,
00:55:48she is German.
00:55:50And she told us for years
00:55:52that my dad's side of the family
00:55:54and my grandfather's was Italian.
00:55:56So I grew up thinking, you know,
00:55:58okay, I got some flavor here.
00:56:00Italian, you know.
00:56:02My class ring when I bought it in high school
00:56:04had the Italian flag on it.
00:56:06I was so proud to be Italian.
00:56:08Fast forward a few, like, three years ago.
00:56:10My sister does an Ancestry.com.
00:56:12I knew that this is where we were headed.
00:56:14I'm so excited.
00:56:16And it turns out the closest we have
00:56:18is .3% broadly European.
00:56:20Shut up.
00:56:22It's not even...
00:56:24It's not even .3% Italian?
00:56:26Most of it
00:56:28Nigerian, Congolese, Sierra Leonean,
00:56:30and primarily a lot of West Africa.
00:56:32So it turns out
00:56:34that my dad
00:56:36is actually like
00:56:38three-fifths or half black.
00:56:40Wow.
00:56:42I have identified as white my whole life.
00:56:44Yeah.
00:56:46I pretty much thought I was.
00:56:48And it turns out I'm not even Italian.
00:56:50It's a really good story.
00:56:52And of course you want to understand it.
00:56:54That's cool. That's interesting.
00:56:56You're looking into Ghanaian and Nigerian cultures.
00:56:58That's really cool.
00:57:00Yeah, this is like a lot of West Africa
00:57:02that I'm mixed with.
00:57:04So there's a lot of different cultures here
00:57:06that now I get to learn about
00:57:08on a more personal level.
00:57:10Yeah.
00:57:12I find it fascinating.
00:57:14That's so cool.
00:57:16Like, a really cool experience for you to really, like, dive in.
00:57:18And I'm really glad we're having this conversation
00:57:20because the world is changing,
00:57:22and I can't wait for it to evolve even further.
00:57:24I think we've been somewhat...
00:57:26I don't want to use force to think that we had to fit in one box.
00:57:28Yeah.
00:57:30Growing up in my childhood,
00:57:32I would be given the, like,
00:57:34standardized tests
00:57:36that said,
00:57:38what is your race, ethnicity?
00:57:40And I was always very confused.
00:57:42Oh, really?
00:57:44I'm mixed, right? So my mom is from Honduras.
00:57:46Okay.
00:57:48Her parents are Honduran,
00:57:50but they are an interracial couple.
00:57:52My dad is African-American, black.
00:57:54He has, like, some Cherokee ancestry
00:57:56that goes down the lineage.
00:57:58Okay, so you really are a mutt, girl.
00:58:00I'm a fucking mutt.
00:58:02I believe that you date or marry somebody
00:58:04for selfish reasons.
00:58:06You do it because they're going to make you a better person.
00:58:08And that comes from pushing you
00:58:10to look into new ideas.
00:58:12Because in turn, if somebody's making you better,
00:58:14you're going to do the same to them.
00:58:16You're going to force them to be a better version of themselves.
00:58:18I don't want to settle for anything less.
00:58:20I agree.
00:58:22Like, you make me feel super confident
00:58:24in being here
00:58:26was the right thing for me
00:58:28and for you.
00:58:30Like, you make me feel really special.
00:58:32You give me butterflies.
00:58:34You're incredibly sweet.
00:58:36You're just such a good guy.
00:58:38There's a difference between having a really good conversation
00:58:40and feeling something through the pods.
00:58:42Yeah.
00:58:44Let's just say...
00:58:46How can I put it?
00:58:48Uh...
00:58:50I know where my feelings lie,
00:58:52and I know what my gut says, and I'm going to follow that.
00:58:54Because you just know
00:58:56when I get down on one knee and I say,
00:58:58you know, I choose you, I want you to know
00:59:00without a shadow of a doubt
00:59:02that it's me as well.
00:59:04We can make it through
00:59:06Me and you
00:59:08We can make it through
00:59:12Whoo!
00:59:14There it is.
00:59:16That's what I'm talking about.
00:59:18Hey, Bodhi. Hey, Tim.
00:59:20I'm floating. I get butterflies.
00:59:24Hello. Ooh, food.
00:59:26I got your blanket. Same.
00:59:28I'm going home tonight with it. You should.
00:59:30It's funny. I was, um, playing pool
00:59:32just now, like, before I came in here,
00:59:34and my blanket was sitting. I turned around,
00:59:36and Bodhi was sniffing hard as shit.
00:59:38I was like, hey, man, keep my wife's blanket
00:59:40out your fucking nose.
00:59:42Mm-hmm.
00:59:44Yeah. Okay. I love this.
00:59:46Me too. I'm so excited.
00:59:48So we gonna eat, right? We should.
00:59:50I did write a prayer for us.
00:59:52So, um... Tyler, shut up.
00:59:54I'm dead serious.
00:59:56I wrote something. Okay.
00:59:58Dear God, thank you for allowing us this food
01:00:00and be healthy enough to eat it.
01:00:02Thank you for waking us up today, allowing us to see each other
01:00:04right now. Thank you for bringing us together
01:00:06in this very unique experience.
01:00:08I thank you, God, for the blessing with someone
01:00:10who is such a soft and kind spirit.
01:00:12I thank you for allowing me to feel
01:00:14so safe with Ashley. I ask that
01:00:16you watch over us as we continue to grow
01:00:18and create an unbreakable bond.
01:00:20And thank you for showing me what love can truly feel like.
01:00:22I am truly blessed,
01:00:24and I just want to say thank you.
01:00:26It's in your precious name I pray. Amen.
01:00:28Oof.
01:00:30Amen. Oh, my gosh.
01:00:32That's so sweet. Yeah, I was, you know...
01:00:34So sweet. Oh, my gosh.
01:00:36So, yeah, we can eat. Let's eat this food.
01:00:38It looks good. I'm, like, emotional.
01:00:40All right. Oof.
01:00:42There's no right way to pray,
01:00:44but I've always been scared to, like, pray out loud.
01:00:46I just want to, like, have a
01:00:48relationship moving forward where we're able to
01:00:50comfortably talk and pray with each other.
01:00:52Mm-mm-mm. Here we go.
01:00:54Mm-hmm. My faith has
01:00:56gotten me through so many different things
01:00:58that, like, I've never really had someone
01:01:00that I could pray with. I never experienced
01:01:02this feeling ever. Before I got here,
01:01:04I never needed to feel safe.
01:01:06And then, like, after being here with you, I'm, like,
01:01:08I feel safe that I can, like, talk to you,
01:01:10express my past,
01:01:12and not feel judged.
01:01:14That we can, like, have a conversation
01:01:16and it not be an argument.
01:01:18Like, I feel comfortable doing that moving forward.
01:01:20I love that you're consistent.
01:01:22You felt sincere right away.
01:01:24You didn't, like, show up as anyone else. You just, like,
01:01:26showed up like, hey, like, I'm sorry.
01:01:28Like, I'm fucking nervous. This is who I am.
01:01:30I was telling the guys, too. I was like, bro, I have
01:01:32no clue what she looks like.
01:01:34Nope. Sure don't. Yeah, and I really do not
01:01:36give a fuck. Like, I know how I feel.
01:01:38And whoever
01:01:40I end up seeing, that's gonna be my road dog
01:01:42from now on. Oh, love that.
01:01:44Alright, you ready to listen to some music?
01:01:46I am. Yeah.
01:01:48I have an eclectic musical palette.
01:01:50Listen to a little country, a little alternative.
01:01:5290s and early
01:01:542000s, R&B is my favorite.
01:01:56This is, like, when people weren't afraid to, like,
01:01:58talk about love. I love that. But just know
01:02:00this, some of my songs are embarrassing.
01:02:02No, me too. Alright, I'm ready.
01:02:04Okay, here we go.
01:02:08They say to find somebody
01:02:10that'll fill your cup.
01:02:14My heart spilled
01:02:16over, now my mind's made up.
01:02:20It's how I know, how I know,
01:02:22how I know it's us.
01:02:24Oh my god,
01:02:26I love this song.
01:02:30Are you listening?
01:02:32Yeah.
01:02:36I really love you.
01:02:38I want you to know you're safe,
01:02:40and you're protected.
01:02:46No matter what happens here,
01:02:50I'm going to always have you.
01:02:52I got your back
01:02:54for life.
01:02:56Sometimes when hearts are healing,
01:02:58the ghost of me
01:03:00rubs the feeling.
01:03:02Are you ready?
01:03:08It's her legacy.
01:03:12You okay? Yeah.
01:03:14Oh, man.
01:03:18Crazy. Crazy, crazy, crazy.
01:03:20Smell the blanket.
01:03:22That's me hugging you.
01:03:26Wipe the tears
01:03:28off the blanket.
01:03:30And I'm like, not a
01:03:32crier at all, I just like...
01:03:34No, I can tell, trust me.
01:03:36What's going
01:03:38through your head?
01:03:40It's just
01:03:42everything I want long-term,
01:03:44you know, that I feel I could have
01:03:46here.
01:03:48You can have it. It's...
01:03:50You see that little blue moving wall?
01:03:52It's on the other
01:03:54side.
01:03:56Oh, Tyler,
01:03:58Tyler, Tyler. Ashley,
01:04:00Ashley, Ashley.
01:04:02Who knew?
01:04:04Who knew that would happen today?
01:04:06I didn't.
01:04:08I promise you, I don't care
01:04:10what's on the other side of that wall.
01:04:12Like a hundred percent.
01:04:14Because we're getting married.
01:04:16We're getting married.
01:04:24I'm, like, so emotional.
01:04:26I'm about to cry. In a good way.
01:04:28He literally wrote down a prayer,
01:04:30a blessing over our dynamic.
01:04:32He loves you. And our future
01:04:34and, like, trust and, like...
01:04:36And I'm in there, like...
01:04:38Is this a dream?
01:04:40What's happening? Is this gotta be a dream?
01:04:42He's a good man.
01:04:44He loves you.
01:04:46I'm so happy for you. This is, like, nuts.
01:04:50Oh, God.
01:04:52Stroll of a man in love.
01:05:08The desire to be loved
01:05:10on the inside was something that
01:05:12I wanted, but I didn't want
01:05:14a potential husband.
01:05:16I didn't need a husband.
01:05:18But what I really wanted
01:05:20was a soulmate.
01:05:24I've never felt this way
01:05:26in my entire life. It's...
01:05:28It's indescribable.
01:05:30And unprecedented.
01:05:32It's amazing. It's...
01:05:34I mean, I melt every time I hear her voice.
01:05:36And it's just... I just...
01:05:38It's really hard to describe
01:05:40how incredible I feel
01:05:42when I'm with her.
01:05:44Taylor is brilliant.
01:05:46She's caring.
01:05:48She's thoughtful.
01:05:50She's passionate.
01:05:54She's very, very sweet.
01:05:56And she's very...
01:05:58Everything that she's saying
01:06:00just feels very real to me.
01:06:04This is so wild.
01:06:06This is so wild.
01:06:08To know the person that Taylor is
01:06:10and how amazing
01:06:12she is
01:06:14and feeling that she feels the same way
01:06:16for me is just...
01:06:18It's incredible.
01:06:22I've been very diligent
01:06:24about making sure that I don't share
01:06:26anything about how I look.
01:06:28I'm obviously
01:06:30very excited to see
01:06:32what he thinks I look like.
01:06:34I keep forgetting that's a bit a part of it.
01:06:36Like, last night, I started
01:06:38being like, oh, my God.
01:06:40Today, I'm starting to get
01:06:42the nerves.
01:06:44But I'm really
01:06:46excited about seeing him.
01:06:48And I don't think it matters what we look like
01:06:50when I made the decision
01:06:52to not share my mom's name
01:06:54because that gave away
01:06:56a bit of my ethnicity.
01:06:58To then have Garrett reach a point
01:07:00where he feels that the inside parts
01:07:02of me and what makes Taylor
01:07:04is more than enough.
01:07:06To have Garrett make me feel the way that I do
01:07:08is incredible.
01:07:10And I'm so excited.
01:07:16Nobody gets engaged this way.
01:07:18There's no way to replicate it.
01:07:20Before coming here, I was at a point in my life
01:07:22where I didn't think that
01:07:24I was ever going to find
01:07:26the one for me. I wasn't able to find
01:07:28someone that I connected with
01:07:30so deeply and so passionately.
01:07:32And...
01:07:34now I have.
01:07:38Taylor and I have remained very strict
01:07:40in not talking about appearances, so
01:07:42she knows I'm white.
01:07:44She has nothing else on me other than that, and I have
01:07:46absolutely nothing on her.
01:07:48I hadn't thought about it until this moment,
01:07:50but not knowing Taylor's ethnicity
01:07:52doesn't concern me.
01:07:54It's as if this experiment forces us to do exactly
01:07:56what marriage is intended for.
01:07:58It's for us to marry one another for the people
01:08:00that we are, not how we look.
01:08:02And I believe that
01:08:04my love for
01:08:06Taylor is so strong that it won't
01:08:08matter what she looks like.
01:08:28It's like I'm suffocating,
01:08:30breathing. I just
01:08:32wanna know.
01:08:38So intoxicating.
01:08:40Think I am addicted
01:08:42to your flavor.
01:08:44I just wanna know.
01:08:52So intoxicating.
01:08:54I just wanna know.
01:08:58Oh, oh, oh.
01:09:00We can't be.
01:09:28We can't be.
01:09:58We can't be.
01:10:28We can't be.
01:10:30We can't be.
01:10:32We can't be.
01:10:34We can't be.
01:10:36We can't be.
01:10:38We can't be.
01:10:40We can't be.
01:10:42We can't be.
01:10:44We can't be.
01:10:46We can't be.
01:10:48We can't be.
01:10:50We can't be.
01:10:52We can't be.
01:10:54We can't be.