After an alien lands in the town park, the government sends out their super soldier, Don Von Blinski to prevent the alie | dG1femNMMXltaXVCUGs
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry
00:30Citizens of Earth, I come here not to conquer, but to deliver a message of peace
00:48Uh, Mr. Wilcox
00:49Yeah, what's up?
00:50We have an extraterrestrial life form landed in Town Park, interacting with civilians
00:54I mean, yeah, what about it?
00:55He's spreading ideas out to the civilians
00:57Oh, yeah, yeah, we can't have ideas spread
00:59First report to the lab
01:00In case of emergencies like this, we have our engineered super soldier to fight against invasions and appeal to the common worker
01:06Gave him the everyday relatable name of Don Bon-Blinsky
01:09He is ready for launch, Mr. Wilcox
01:11Rise, Don Bon-Blinsky
01:15Go and protect the people of this great country from the evasive ideology of a...
01:19Yes, Papi
01:23I would say Paradise is the most accessible, but Burnout 3 and Revenge are like ideal versions if you can find a copy
01:29What the fuck is going on over there?
01:37What did I tell you?
01:38Give me some of that, baby
01:40Whoa, dude, how did you do that?
01:43I just get that for being an average show chimp, you know, working on the ranch, eating good, not letting the government tell me what to do
01:51He's just like me
01:52Nah, that's our guy
01:53What's your name?
01:54Don Bon-Blinsky Mark IV, I mean, the 4th
01:57Dude, you're way better than the other guy
02:00Yeah, that guy just wanted to teach us a bunch of lame intellectual shit, but you're actually a bro though
02:06Alright, shithead, time to meet your maker
02:11Wow, you saved me, Don
02:12Ooh, where are we going now?
02:18I can't do this anymore, I'm too burnt out
02:20What? Wait, I remember my mother giving me the game Burnout Legends on Christmas Day
02:26Oh shit, he's thinking
02:27Why is he thinking?
02:28I don't know, something triggered his old brain
02:29I don't want excuses, bring me the tranquilizer
02:31Here you go, sir
02:32What the fuck is the holdup?
02:34Nope
02:37You made me discover my love for Cardis
02:43Uh, yeah, what about it?
02:45I forgot what I was saying
02:47Alright, we're back in business
02:48Oh god, please no
02:51Please don't kill me
02:53I only landed here to bring people together
02:56And remember what brought them joy
02:58Burnout was one of those things
03:01What is happening? Is this a fucking bit?
03:03Yeah, it was actually really fun
03:05What happened to that series?
03:07I'd rather play that than the boring Forza and Gran Turismo crap
03:10Are we serious right now?
03:11You're talking about the video game series Burnout, sir
03:13Who cares?
03:14You know, I remember playing Burnout Dominator as a young man once
03:18It was actually really cool
03:21Maybe this isn't who I truly am
03:23Maybe things can change
03:25If he says some really lame shit like
03:27I can change
03:28Maybe I can change
03:29God damn it, man
03:30Not again
03:32Where does this country come to?
03:34Burnout is dog shit
03:35Video games aren't even in art form, man
03:37Mr. Funny Alien, sir
03:39I want to thank you for reminding me who I am
03:42All we know is one thing that needs to change
03:46To bring us together in happiness again
03:48People of Earth
03:50I say this again with a heavy heart
03:53To bring peace instead of destruction
03:57We need to bring Burnout back
03:59But like online
04:01And also bring back Crash Mode
04:03That mode was so fun
04:04Then you will no longer be doomed