We're going to need some crackers for all this cheese... Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’re counting down our picks for the cheesiest 80’s films!
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00:00Hey, buddy, can I help you?
00:04Hello, Buckaroo Banzai?
00:06Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we're counting down our picks for the cheesiest 80s films.
00:12Keep in mind, cheesy doesn't always mean bad, as many of these campy classics are beloved for their quirky takes and nostalgic appeal.
00:22Take your time, watch your gun sights, lead your targets, and above all, relax!
00:28Number 10. Xanadu
00:38Featuring a down-on-his-luck artist named Sonny, a magical girl coming to life from a drawing, and more neon than a dozen other films combined, Xanadu is quintessential 80s cheese.
00:50The fantasy musical tells the tale of an ancient Greek muse that arrives in Los Angeles in 1980 and inspires Sonny to create a fantastic roller disco.
01:00The film was so reviled by some that it helped create the notorious Golden Raspberry Awards.
01:06Kira!
01:07Sonny! How did you get here?
01:10You didn't think I'd let you get away from me, did you?
01:13You'll have to go back.
01:14Okay, I'm ready. Let's go!
01:16Yet the film, and its soundtrack featuring star Olivia Newton-John and Electric Light Orchestra, earned a number of fans.
01:24In fact, it endures to this day as a cult classic.
01:28Now that I'm here, now that you're near, it's Xanadu!
01:35Number 9. The Karate Kid Part 3
01:38Sensei Kreese, this is Pat Johnson from the All Valley Tournament calling again.
01:42Look, we're sorry you lost all your students. I guess the Cobra guy won't be entering the tournament this year.
01:47Evil karate instructor John Kreese has fallen on hard times since his student lost a tournament and vows revenge against Daniel and Mr. Miyagi.
01:56Rather than enact it himself, however, he calls a previously unmentioned Vietnam War buddy Terry Silver.
02:03Being an 80s bad guy, Silver is naturally an evil billionaire with slicked back hair who casually discusses dumping nuclear waste and makes calls from his sauna on a very large cell phone.
02:16Make his knuckles bleed.
02:20Hey! Hey, I like that!
02:23Bizarre elements include climbing down a cliff to save a bonsai tree, Ralph Macchio playing a teenager while in his late 20s and a finale carbon copied from the original.
02:33It even had one of the best and cheesiest scenes of the decade with a deranged Kreese jump scare.
02:45Let's show Mr. Kreese how he's going to get his business back.
02:48Number 8. Big Trouble in Little China
02:54See? There was nothing. But that's how it always begins.
03:01Collaborating with Kurt Russell for the third time in the decade, Big Trouble in Little China finally allowed director John Carpenter to realize his dream of making a martial arts film.
03:11What's happening, Wang?
03:13Chinese standoff.
03:14A what?
03:16Make a sound.
03:23In addition to being a martial arts action film, Big Trouble was a comedy, fantasy and monster movie all rolled into one.
03:31Russell plays normal guy and truck driver Jack Burton who inadvertently gets caught up in an ancient battle between good and evil when trying to collect all the bets.
03:40And so now we have to grab your fiancé by the back.
03:42Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I'm a reasonable guy but I've just experienced some very unreasonable things.
03:48Depends on how you look at it.
03:49The hell it does. So somebody, I don't care who, tell me what is going on.
03:54That evil is, of course, the immortal and powerful Chinese sorcerer David Lopin, now residing in San Francisco's Chinatown and played by fellow 80s legend James Hong.
04:05Number 7. Flash Gordon
04:07You may leave. Tell the world what Hans Zarkov has done.
04:13Well, I guess I'll be running along now.
04:16You lunatic!
04:17Italian producer Dino De Laurentiis long held the film rights to a Flash Gordon adaptation.
04:23During the 70s, relative unknown filmmaker at the time, George Lucas, lobbied to make the film.
04:29However, De Laurentiis refused, preferring a more comedic take for the adaptation of the comic and film's serial character.
04:37Any final requests?
04:38Yes. Let me see Dale right away.
04:41Oh dear. Apathetic. Yes, I anticipated that.
04:47The effects paled in comparison to the space opera Lucas went on to make, Star Wars.
04:52The script for Flash Gordon was totally confused and starred a complete unknown, all of which gave it a certain charm.
04:59Most importantly was the decision to forgo a traditional score for a soundtrack from glam rock legends, Queen.
05:12Number 6. Real Genius
05:17Dr. Hathaway, I saw your show the other night on radioactive isotopes, and I've got a question for you.
05:23Yeah?
05:24Is that your real hair?
05:26Yeah.
05:27I tell you, is Mitch by any chance a doctor?
05:29Oh, I know!
05:30It's amazing.
05:32In this film, a technological genius, Chris Knight, would rather use his talents to invent floating lounge chairs and attend parties than work on his college assignment, a giant laser.
05:43However, after some light blackmail from his professor Hathaway, played by frequent 80s bureaucratic bad guy William Atherton, Chris and his roommate eventually create the laser.
05:54Ready? Laser on!
05:58Whoa!
06:05Of course, Hathaway is secretly working for the CIA and they plan to use the laser to illegally assassinate targets from space.
06:13This leads to a finale where the team of geniuses must stop the agency from using their invention for evil.
06:19In the end, they save the day and use the laser to pop a tsunami of popcorn in Hathaway's house.
06:26All while Tears for Fears plays over the closing credits.
06:30Even while we sleep, we will find you acting on your best behavior.
06:41Number 5. Masters of the Universe
06:44Help! Help! Get me out of this!
06:48It's alright.
06:49Help! Help! Help somebody!
06:54Based on the massively popular toyline from Mattel and the subsequent animated series,
06:59the live-action version of Masters of the Universe forewent the fantastical locations on planet Eternia for much of the runtime.
07:06Instead, a scantily clad He-Man, played by a frequently overdubbed Dolph Lundgren and his nemesis Skeletor,
07:13played by the over-the-top, in-the-best-way-possible Frank Langella, travel to a much more budget-friendly 1987 California.
07:22I believe you have something of interest.
07:24Well, let me guess. That music is more than…
07:26By the sorceress we found.
07:27Freeze! All of you!
07:29Choice, really choice. What is this, a circus act?
07:33The film faced a number of budgetary problems and restrictions due to Mattel's tightening purse strings,
07:38leading to a final duel between He-Man and Skeletor that was shot in near darkness.
07:44It's no wonder that, despite a post-credits stinger, there was no sequel.
07:50I'll be back.
07:54Number 4. The Running Man
07:56I said the crowd is unarmed. There are lots of women and children down there. All they want is food, for God's sake.
08:01Taking place primarily in the far-off year of 2019, the masses are distracted from the fascist world they live in
08:09by a colorful bloodsport on TV known as The Running Man.
08:13Criminals don bright spandex and must survive a deadly gauntlet to allegedly win their freedom.
08:18Let's get out of here. Come on. Wise, come on. Go.
08:29In their way are the Stalkers, killers with outrageous costumes and weapons,
08:33boasting signature themes and creative ways to dispatch their targets.
08:38Playing a cop framed for an atrocity by his government, Arnold Schwarzenegger understood the assignment
08:43and absolutely hams it up in a wonderfully over-the-top performance that's full of his signature one-liners.
08:50Good luck.
08:53You too.
08:54Number 3. The Last Starfighter
08:57You can do it, Alex. You can do it.
09:05That's the one. That's the one we want.
09:08A year after Return of the Jedi ended the original Star Wars trilogy,
09:12studios wanted to make the next great space opera.
09:15And quickly. So quickly, in fact, that The Last Starfighter was shot in just 38 days.
09:21However, the film is not necessarily memorable for its production, but rather its post-production.
09:27You see, it's one of the first films to use CGI extensively.
09:31Activate automatic repulsor gun.
09:42This early use of CG firmly gives it an unmistakably 80s look.
09:47And seeing how its plot involves a talented arcade video game player using his skills to save the galaxy,
09:53it really could not have come out in any other decade.
09:56We need time to recharge.
10:00Laser powered brain.
10:05Number 2. Over the Top
10:12There is only love.
10:17Sly Stallone was in his fair share of cheesy 80s movies,
10:20finding more and more ways for him to show off his physique, not to mention ego.
10:25His overly serious demeanor as an action hero, along with his muscles, were on display for cheese fests like Cobra.
10:32But on the premise alone, we have to give this slot to Over the Top.
10:36If you want it, Mike, you gotta take it.
10:39Do you hear me? You gotta take it.
10:41Go in there and try. I know you can win.
10:43But even if you don't, so what? So you lose.
10:46Stallone, who also co-wrote the film, plays a long haul trucker named Hawk
10:51on a mission to reconnect with his estranged son the only way he knows how.
10:55Hawk partakes in some high stakes arm wrestling.
10:58Set to an electronic score by Giorgio Moroder, who teamed with Kenny Loggins for the film's signature track,
11:04Hawk competes in the arm wrestling world championships in Las Vegas, looking for glory and redemption.
11:10Hawk and son. What do you think of that?
11:13Hawk and son.
11:16Hawk and son.
11:18Hey, I think this might work.
11:20Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.
11:24Batteries not included.
11:26Little aliens save the apartment complex.
11:28Habla español?
11:32Están perdidos.
11:35Don't hurt anybody, okay?
11:37UHF. Weird Al's magnum opus.
11:40Did you get fired again?
11:44Yes! Yes! It's all true! I just don't know what's wrong with me!
11:51So let's go to dinner.
11:52The Apple. A biblical allegory musical set in the far off future of 1994.
11:58For the apple! Mystery apple! Juju apple! Old voodoo apple!
12:03Three O'Clock High. A battle with an 80's high school bully.
12:07Pack her head, let's see what you got!
12:15Roadhouse. A peaceful bouncer rips throats to save a small town.
12:22Somebody get a drink around here?
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12:45Number 1. The adventures of Buckaroo Bonsai across the 8th dimension.
12:52I don't have anything.
12:57This is weird.
12:59The titular Buckaroo, a half Japanese physicist, rock star and neurosurgeon,
13:04who acts as a test pilot in his spare time, has invented a way to travel through solid matter.
13:10However, a group of evil aliens, led by John Lithgow doing an Italian accent,
13:15seek to steal his device in order to bring their maniacal leader out of interdimensional exile.
13:21You're not getting jacked from me until you let Penny out of this junkyard.
13:25Curse you, Bonsai! Don't you realize what you're saying?
13:29Your whole plan is going to be destroyed and you sit here wasting time!
13:33Cheesy elements include an attempt to start World War III,
13:36a previously unknown twin sister of Bonsai's deceased wife that he falls in love with,
13:41and Jeff Goldblum in a cowboy suit.
13:44And that's just scratching the surface.
13:46The fact that Buckaroo Bonsai was even made by a major studio is kind of a miracle.
13:51There is little time.
13:53You better come quickly if your planet is still important to you.
13:57Leave her to me.
13:59You take care of business.
14:01What's your favorite slice of 80s cheese?
14:04Let us know in the comments below.
14:06Wait a minute.
14:07Yes?
14:10I mean, I'd just like to talk to you.
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