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The ability to hurl small coins, rip off your own body parts, control a few bees, or listen to the radio might not seem especially superheroic, but that didn't stop these aspiring heroes from giving it their all.

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00:00The ability to haul small coins, rip off your own body parts, control a few bees, or listen
00:05to the radio might not seem especially superheroic, but that didn't stop these aspiring heroes
00:10from giving it their all.
00:13You can usually tell whether or not a hero is a heavy hitter based on the team they end
00:16up on, and that's definitely true for Keferob Chibes, otherwise known as Antennae Lad or
00:21Antennae Boy, depending on what you're reading.
00:23An alien from the planet Grixior, Antennae Lad first appeared in Adventure Comics in 1963.
00:29As a member of the Legion of Substitute Heroes, he's part of a team of Rejects who are turned
00:33down for roles in the more reputable Legion of Superheroes during a membership drive after
00:38the death of Lightning Lad.
00:39Sure, these Rejects are written to be nearly useless, but they're still real DC Comics
00:44heroes.
00:45Antennae Lad can tune in and rebroadcast radio signals from whatever planet he's on, from
00:49the past, present, or future.
00:51Hearing into the future could be a pretty unique and impressive ability, but Antennae
00:55Lad isn't able to control his power, so he mostly just annoys the people around him.
01:00Craig Hollis is the only member of the species Homo Supreme, which is one step up from Homo
01:04Superior, Marvel Comics' usual designation for mutants.
01:08After he learned that he couldn't die due to a pact his mother made with the cosmic
01:11being Death Urge, he became the superhero known as Mr. Immortal and founded the Great
01:16Lakes Avengers.
01:17And yes, the GLA is another team written to be ridiculous.
01:20On the surface, Mr. Immortal's inability to die sounds great, but it's actually a curse.
01:25It didn't take long for Hollis to begin suffering mental anguish about his condition, once realizing
01:30that everyone he knows is going to die.
01:32Before deciding to become a superhero, Hollis engaged in several attempts to end his own
01:37life, only to spring back to life again.
01:39As Mr. Immortal, Hollis has no other powers except standard heroic athleticism, so he
01:44makes himself a target to protect his team.
01:46Unfortunately, his depressed mental state remains his greatest obstacle, as does his
01:50uncontrollable rage every time he comes back to life.
01:53He's useful in a fight as a diversion, but so is a smoke bomb.
01:57The Green Lantern Corps is made up of some of the most powerful, ring-slinging beings
02:01in the universe, right?
02:02Well, once in a while, a Guardian makes a weird choice when searching for a new host
02:06for a power ring.
02:07Enter Chip, a space rodent who apparently had more willpower and fearlessness than any
02:11other alien in Space Sector 1014.
02:14Chip isn't even the weirdest Green Lantern.
02:16Liesel Parn is a virus, Floado Span is a cloud of gas, and Wan is an entire planet.
02:21I am Mobile.
02:25Chip comes from a planet populated by intelligent animals resembling Earth creatures.
02:29He looks like a squirrel, though some artists make him look more like a chipmunk, which
02:33makes more sense given his name.
02:35It's not his life, but his death that makes him a little ridiculous.
02:38Unfortunately, despite having the powers of a Green Lantern, he also had their weaknesses
02:42— specifically, things that are yellow.
02:44He met his match when he was hit by a yellow truck and flattened.
02:47He was resurrected as a Black Lantern during the Blackest Night event, and returned to
02:51the grave soon after.
02:53Drew Recept, aka Infectious Lass, is another member of the intentionally goofy Legion of
02:58Substitute Heroes.
02:59Her species is host to colonies of microorganisms that don't make her ill, but can make others
03:04sick.
03:05When she tried out for the Legion of Superheroes, she demonstrated her abilities on Starboy,
03:09who ended up getting dragged out on a stretcher.
03:11It's a potentially useful superpower, but she can't fully control it.
03:15A person can become sick just by being around her.
03:24That makes her more of a liability than an asset.
03:27She's also been known to miss her target and make the wrong person sick.
03:30So while Infectious Lass does try her best, her lack of control makes her dangerous.
03:35Madame Fatal is an odd character, first published in the pages of 1940s crack comics Number
03:40One, alongside other questionable crimefighters like The Clock and Wizard Wells.
03:46But here's the twist.
03:47The Madame is a man.
03:48His real name is Richard Stanton, and he's an actor who puts his skill set to use by
03:52dressing up as an old woman to fight crime.
03:54Think of Bruce Wayne with all of his abilities — good looks, money, and style — but take
03:58away the bat costume and have him dress up as someone's grandmother.
04:02Stanton got into crimefighting when his daughter was kidnapped, putting on his old lady costume
04:06and creeping into the criminal underworld to find her.
04:09Stanton ultimately learned that his daughter was alive, and he continued fighting crime
04:12as Madame Fatal.
04:14It's almost genius.
04:15Who would suspect that a little old lady is capable of beating the snot out of a goon?
04:19Still, as clever as that is, like many heroes of the era, Madame Fatal has no superpowers.
04:24She's just an actor in good shape who can throw a punch, no trick arrows or cool batarangs,
04:29and when your only gimmick is a white wig and a granny dress, you're not really bound
04:32for glory.
04:34Marvel Comics mutants run the gamut in terms of appearance and abilities, and unfortunately,
04:38that results in a lot of weirdos, like Hector and Dozer, better known as Wraith.
04:43Not to be confused with the seven or so other Marvel characters also called Wraith.
04:47This Wraith's ability is simple — he can turn partially invisible.
04:50Unfortunately, the only part he can turn invisible is his skin, revealing all of his internal
04:55organs, which is a bit disturbing.
04:57He was a member of the X-Men for only a short time.
04:59Wraith can turn other skin translucent as well, but only an area the general size of
05:03his own body.
05:04This is probably a little disorienting, and may be even the beginning of an existential
05:08crisis for the individual who can see their own bones, but the ability is severely limited.
05:13Plus, when Wraith does this, he temporarily becomes normal again.
05:16Ultimately, Wraith's ability is more unsettling than it is useful in a fight.
05:21Back in 1940, when the Red Bee was introduced in the pages of hit comics number one, most
05:25heroes were spies, detectives, or vigilantes with bags of practical tricks with no supernatural
05:31powers.
05:32Michael McCartney, aka the Red Bee, would fight crime at night while prosecuting the
05:35evildoers of Superior City during the day as an assistant D.A.
05:39While he has no powers, he's highly skilled in the odd combination of controlling bugs
05:43and marksmanship.
05:44He carries a gun that shoots stingers and attacks his enemies with highly-trained bees
05:48that he keeps in his belt buckle.
05:50He even has a favorite bee named Michael, and he can mess you up.
05:53Whacky!
05:54Whacky!
05:55Whacky!
05:56Whacky!
05:57Whacky!
05:58Whacky!
05:59Whacky!
06:00Whacky!
06:02Today, he's such a comically weird character that DC brought in an older version of the
06:06Red Bee to team up with Peacemaker for some laughs in 2023's Peacemaker Tries Hard miniseries.
06:12Becca Parker was a late superhero known as Gin Genie, a powerful member of the X-Force
06:16for exactly one issue.
06:18From the start, her iteration of the team was destined to die.
06:21Gin Genie could generate powerful seismic waves in proportion to how drunk she was.
06:25A sober Gin Genie had no powers, but she proved herself effective on several missions, though
06:29constantly drinking to empower oneself wasn't the best message to send to the team's fans.
06:34An in-universe problem with drinking alcohol to trigger a mutant's ability is that being
06:38drunk made it difficult to hit a target, and it also made her very surly.
06:42This was too much for the X-Force.
06:44Gin Genie's Handler sent her to her death as part of a publicity stunt involving a boy
06:48band that had been captured by terrorists.
06:51Dag Wentim hails from Xuen, a planet of aliens who can transform into stone as a way to survive
06:55the planet's long nights, which last about half an Earth year.
06:59Dag attempted to join the Legion of Superheroes as Stone Boy, but the fact that all he can
07:03actually do is fall asleep and turn into stone made that a long shot.
07:06Sure, you could use him as a battering ram or drop him on someone, but other than that,
07:11Dag's pretty useless.
07:20Like so many others, he turned to the Legion of Substitute Heroes instead.
07:24Stone Boy eventually gained the ability to remain conscious while in his stone state.
07:28After that, he gained the ability to move, and finally, he learned how to transform only
07:32parts of his body into stone.
07:34That's better than basically becoming a statue, but Stone Boy is still far from the first
07:38hero you'd call when trouble finds you.
07:40Marvel's Jay Pennington Pennypacker was an accountant introduced in the pages of 1992's
07:45NFL Super Pro No. 10 as one of a group of guys who attended a special camp to help men
07:50find their self-esteem.
07:51Of course, it was all a front for an evil scientist to use them as guinea pigs for his
07:55own experiments.
07:56In what turns out to be a not-very-serious issue, the dweeby Pennypacker gains the ability
08:01to shoot loose change from his hands.
08:03He adopts the name Almighty Dollar to fight crime as a member of the Happy Campers.
08:07The hero had no real combat skills, but there's seemingly no limit on the number of coins
08:11he can discharge.
08:12Almighty Dollar only ever appeared in the issue he was introduced in, so it's unknown
08:16if he ever went on to fight crime a few cents at a time.
08:19Like many of these heroes, Friendly Fire was created as a joke character, alongside others
08:24like Dogwelder and the perverted Bueno Excelente.
08:27Friendly Fire was probably the most powerful member of DC Comics' intentionally offensive
08:31Section 8 team, and could generate blasts of energy from his hands.
08:35Unfortunately, he didn't have the best name, and often hit the other members of his team.
08:39Because of this, he took on the name Friendly Fire and continued blasting his allies and
08:43innocent bystanders.
08:44You'd think that massive power would make him the leader of the team, but he became
08:48more of a liability than anything else.
08:50He also proved to be a deadly danger to himself, because in Hitman issue number 55, Friendly
08:54Fire accidentally blasted his own head off.
08:57If it's not clear yet, the Legion of Substitute Heroes isn't the greatest superhero organization.
09:02Another member is Ulu Vak, aka Color Kid.
09:05He hails from the planet Lupra, where he was empowered by light from another dimension,
09:09giving him the ability to alter the color of any object.
09:12While that's an ability that would make any interior decorator the best in the business,
09:16it's not incredibly useful as a superpower.
09:18Color Kid isn't totally useless.
09:20He can change the color of yellow objects, protecting green lanterns from harm.
09:24He made Stoneboy look like Green Kryptonite to scare off some marauding super-pets, and
09:28he changed Green Kryptonite into blue to protect Superboy and Supergirl.
09:31He later adopted the name Color King, and briefly Color Queen, when he accidentally
09:36became a woman.
09:37But there was nothing royal about his powers.
09:39He still did the same thing.
09:40Sure, he may be useful in a handful of very specific situations, but Color Kid is still
09:45one of the least useful superheroes ever.
09:48Tenzil Kem is from the planet Bismol, a not-so-subtle reference to Pepto-Bismol.
09:52For some reasons that will become clear, Bismol had once faced a plague of microbes that made
09:56all food on the planet inedible, so Bismol's inhabitants evolved to be able to eat anything
10:01with no negative repercussions.
10:03Tenzil left his homeworld and managed to find a place in the Legion of Superheroes.
10:07He adopted the name Matter Eater Lad and remained a member of the team for a while before returning
10:12home to serve in Bismol's senate.
10:14While with the Legion, Matter Eater Lad did what his name promised.
10:17He ate stuff, fences, locks, bombs, literally anything that needed to be destroyed.
10:21Having a guy around who can eat harmful and otherwise indestructible things is never bad
10:25in the world of superheroes, though it's unclear how he manages to do this other than a general
10:29understanding that he can eat anything.
10:31It's an interesting power on paper, but there aren't too many dangerous situations you can
10:35eat your way out of.
10:37Floyd Belkin was one of the first people to try out for the Legion of Superheroes, and
10:40he holds the distinction of being the first to reject because all he does is rip off his
10:44own arms.
10:45The Legion of Superheroes has a lot of uses for a detached arm, though Arm Falloff Boy
10:48typically uses them as blunt weapons.
10:50It's off-putting and truly weird, making Arm Falloff Boy one of the most ridiculous characters
10:55in comics.
10:56That was always the point, though, since most Legion applicants weren't that good.
10:59The character only appeared in a handful of issues over the years, and eventually took
11:03on the less ridiculous name Splitter, and to his credit, he's probably one of only a
11:07few characters capable of literal unarmed combat.
11:10Athen Fillion played a similar character called T.D.K. in The Suicide Squad, but his power
11:15was just as useless.
11:18What the f**k?

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