RACHEL and Lajoy met at Lajoy’s place of part time work, where Lajoy was an exotic dancer and Rachel was a customer at the club she was working at. They had an instant connection and both realised that they are bisexual and interested in pursuing polyamory together. After a year of dating, they decided to move in together and are now looking to add another person into their relationship. Even though Rachel is masc presenting, she is also open to having a male in the relationship, something that she has been heavily criticised for. People online don't believe that Rachel is bisexual because of the way that she looks. Lajoy also receives a lot of backlash online, because of her appearance. A lot of people think that she is faking being a lesbian for a place to stay or for money. They have been on numerous dates to find their new addition but are still looking for a man to join the relationship. The only condition is that they have to be attracted to, or involved with, both of them. In this episode of Love Don't Judge we see Rachel and Lajoy meet blind date Steven. Will the three of them gel?
Category
🗞
NewsTranscript
00:00I'm LaJoy.
00:01My name is Rachel.
00:02We're Polly and we're looking for a male partner
00:05to join our relationship.
00:07I'm masculine presenting and bisexual,
00:10so I often get judged for that.
00:11I've never gotten the backlash that I've gotten
00:13with posting about us being Polly.
00:15Why are y'all together?
00:17Like, this doesn't make sense.
00:18Just drop each other and go find a man,
00:20each of y'all individually.
00:22People are like, okay, something is obviously
00:24off in this relationship.
00:26We're going to be going on a date with a guy.
00:29I'm very nervous about the guy.
00:31Being able to be a third to a femme
00:34and a masculine presenting woman.
00:38I was a dancer and Rachel was a chipper.
00:42I just saw this gorgeous woman over there from a distance.
00:46She's like doing her tricks.
00:48And then on top of that, when I started to walk toward her,
00:51she flashed a smile.
00:52The conversation was so good.
00:54I'm like, let's actually go on a date.
00:56We became an official couple within a few months of that.
01:00We introduced Polly and our relationship from the onset.
01:04Like some of the first conversations that we had,
01:06we just said, this is something that we are interested in.
01:09We haven't looked back.
01:11We're looking for a male partner
01:13to join us in our relationship.
01:15Most of our interactions with men have been
01:17just online dating and nothing really in person.
01:20So this would be the first time that we're in person
01:23with a guy that we are potentially interested in.
01:26I am a bit nervous.
01:28I'm a lot more nervous than Rachel.
01:31My brother Tyrese is gonna come over today
01:33and help us get ready for the date.
01:35My initial thoughts about Rachel,
01:36I didn't know at first.
01:37I was kind of iffy about it.
01:38She was kind of like different from the previous people
01:41I've known my sister to deal with.
01:42For me, I believe that two people
01:44can make a relationship work
01:45and just add another person
01:46will kind of just confuse things a little bit.
01:48Just not for me.
01:49So we got this date.
01:52We have a blind date.
01:55Who with who?
01:56That's the thing, it's blind.
01:58We don't know.
01:59We don't know who it is.
01:59But it's a guy.
02:00It is a guy.
02:01A guy?
02:02Yes.
02:03It's a guy.
02:04Why are you looking at me like that?
02:04Why are you looking at me first?
02:07I know it is probably a shocker date.
02:09That would be a surprise.
02:11I'm very surprised.
02:12Tell me why he's surprised.
02:13It'll be kind of different.
02:14You know, I'm used to y'all really like dating females.
02:17So seeing y'all with a guy,
02:19you have to go through my approval first.
02:21Okay, Tyrese, the guy is not playing.
02:24Maybe going to blind date route
02:25will help us find somebody that we both like.
02:27Because usually we meet people
02:29in more of a biased situation.
02:30Like they first come to me or they first come to her.
02:33So the fact that we're going in
02:35and somebody see both of us at the same time,
02:37this might be fun.
02:38Well, whatever makes y'all happy,
02:39you know, it'll make me happy as well.
02:41So.
02:42Thank you, Tyrese.
02:43I don't want you to feel like
02:44this is just something that we're doing just today.
02:46Like this is actually a long-term commitment for us.
02:49All right.
02:50Y'all looking good.
02:51We are cleaned.
02:52Oh, the fist came together.
02:54Fist came together.
02:55Cheers, y'all.
02:57Blessing of.
02:57Cheers.
02:59All right, I'm happy for y'all
03:00and good luck on y'all date tonight.
03:02Thank you, Tyrese.
03:03Appreciate it, man.
03:04This is an absolutely blind date.
03:06We haven't seen pictures.
03:07We haven't messaged.
03:08We haven't talked on the phone.
03:09And don't go playing with my liquor cap.
03:11What?
03:11You don't know anything.
03:12Yeah, we are blind.
03:14I'm very nervous about the confidence of a guy
03:17being able to be a third to a fem
03:20and a masculine presenting woman.
03:22I haven't felt like this nervous since our first date.
03:26Well, I'm Steven.
03:27I'm 41 years old.
03:29Sort of kind of my first time dating two women.
03:32Nowadays, you can't be conservative.
03:34You might miss out on some good or some fun
03:36or something that can change your life.
03:38Who knows?
03:39So I got to ask you, do I pass the eye test?
03:42Yeah.
03:43That honestly wasn't even our concern either.
03:46Well, I got my teeth made, and they ain't gold.
03:48So.
03:49What's your dating life been like?
03:50It's been terrible.
03:51What about yours?
03:52I mean, I honestly landed something really great.
03:55So, who are you in terms of extending to a third person?
03:59You know, that's our main concern.
04:01As a poly couple, we still have boundaries.
04:04We still have rules.
04:05Even though we're poly,
04:06this doesn't mean that this is okay to cheat
04:10or you're looking for a partner.
04:11It's okay to go to this guy.
04:13We have to choose this person together.
04:15We are a team in all aspects.
04:18So question, the biggest question.
04:20Yeah.
04:21Have you ever dated a poly couple?
04:23I have not, but obviously I know all about it.
04:26Got transgender family member friends,
04:28bisexual family member friends.
04:30I don't care about that, if you happy.
04:33I think the only but would be,
04:35how would you feel about walking into a room
04:38with you out on another date?
04:39It'll be exactly.
04:40Someone would cast a judgment on you coming in
04:42with a masculine woman.
04:44Wide ass women though.
04:46I don't really care what other folks think about me.
04:49I mean, I do, but it's like.
04:51I have dated women.
04:53I have dated men in my life and I've posted
04:56and I've never gotten the backlash that I've gotten
04:58with posting about us being poly.
05:00The response can range from people who were like,
05:03I love this for y'all.
05:04Y'all doing what's best for you.
05:06Keep going all the way to extreme haters.
05:08Like, why are y'all together?
05:10Like, this doesn't make sense.
05:11Just drop each other and go find a man.
05:14Each of y'all individually.
05:16People will automatically put a label on her
05:18because she's been a dancer.
05:19They think that she's only doing things
05:21that are materially motivated,
05:23but they don't know her as a person.
05:25Me being masculine and liking men,
05:27people are like, okay, something is obviously off
05:29in this relationship.
05:31She likes to let the haters hate.
05:33And I'm like, we're gonna stop the hater in their tracks.
05:36That's me.
05:37You gotta tell us what was your first impressions
05:39walking up or seeing us.
05:42I'm not gonna, well, you want the truth?
05:45Yes, we gave you the truth.
05:47Okay, I'll tell you.
05:49So in the South, we love big girls.
05:51I'm gonna just say that.
05:54I ain't saying that to be disrespectful.
05:56I'm just saying that I was like.
06:03I think it went good.
06:05I was nervous for nothing.
06:07I think the date went very well.
06:09He was a super nice guy.
06:10Very easy to talk to.
06:12It went good, man.
06:13A lot of chemistry.
06:15I enjoyed it.
06:16I really did.
06:16I thought it was a good looking guy.
06:18I think his smile was gorgeous.
06:20Physically, I thought it was nice.
06:22What about you?
06:26Thoughts?
06:28Oddly, he was more so attracted to you.
06:32Oddly.
06:32Oddly.
06:33No, it's even.
06:34You don't never want to do that
06:36with any woman or man, though.
06:38It's even, man.
06:39I think it was a mutual.
06:40I think it was mutual.
06:42You think so?
06:43Yeah.
06:44Okay.
06:44You can tell that they're one.
06:46They speak as one and think as one.
06:47So that just makes it just like a normal date.
06:51I think we're gonna save the game.
06:53Sooner or better, actually.
06:55They'll probably be making more decisions than me.
07:00I mean, it exceeded my expectations,
07:02but I intentionally went in with a very low bar
07:04because I didn't want to be disappointed.
07:06But I mean, it's just like, wow.
07:07This was like really great.
07:09This was way better than I could have expected,
07:12even in terms of judging what a good date would look like.
07:14So I'm very happy.
07:15Yeah, I was very nervous.
07:18So I went in with like a really low bar,
07:20but I was nervous because I felt like
07:22you exceeded my expectation.
07:27To the people that post judgment
07:29on the lifestyle that we live together,
07:31I would say that it doesn't bother us.
07:34We're gonna continue to live our lives
07:36the way we want to live them.
07:38And if that means adding a third male or a female,
07:41we're going to do whatever our hearts desire together.
07:44Yeah, if you are gonna mind our business,
07:46then hopefully you can find some inspiration.
07:49Hopefully you will see the love.
07:50Judgment doesn't stop our love.