Gogglebox Australia S20E04 (2024)
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TVTranscript
00:00Put down my putting aid.
00:01No, I want to putt on it.
00:03Trust me, you won't be able to putt along the line.
00:05If you can get it to the end of the ruler...
00:06I'll definitely get it to the end of the ruler.
00:08No, you won't.
00:08How much?
00:1010 bucks.
00:11You get one go, 10 bucks.
00:12You got to get to the end, go.
00:1310 bucks.
00:14Go, putt it to the end.
00:15Yep.
00:17Oh, shit.
00:22Every evening in Australia...
00:23Who are these idiots?
00:24Oh, wow.
00:25Okay.
00:26TV reaches over 12 million of us.
00:30That's wild.
00:31But have you ever wondered what other people are watching?
00:33It's almost like it's scripted.
00:35No, it's AI.
00:37Find out what people thought about what was on in the last seven days.
00:41Oh, I'm so excited.
00:43I seriously didn't think that television could get any worse.
00:47This week, we discovered...
00:49The man with a thousand kids.
00:51He just wants to populate the world with his children.
00:53So he's just a full narcissist.
00:56The last king of the cross was back.
00:58We're at King's Cross, baby.
01:00Every time I'm drunk in the city and I look up and I see that sign,
01:02I think expensive Uber home.
01:04And a new documentary explored the powerful bond of fathers and...
01:09Daughters.
01:10It'd be so difficult to be separated from your family.
01:14So important, the daughter-father relationship.
01:16I don't think I've ever been more affected by a show ever.
01:25This morning, I accidentally woke up at 5.05.
01:27And it was dark.
01:28And do you know what panicked the crap out of me?
01:30What?
01:31People do that on purpose.
01:32Yes, to watch the sunrise.
01:34Why?
01:37Sunday on Nine.
01:38Locks on, baby.
01:39We're back to the block land.
01:40Oh, Christ.
01:42Yep.
01:43And they're knee deep into their Phillip Island renos.
01:46So what room are they doing this week?
01:48They're working on a bathroom.
01:50What about the bloody bathroom?
01:51Jesus Christ almighty, get onto something else.
01:55Yeah, yeah, but it's a different bathroom.
01:57The en-suite.
01:58What, are we excited?
01:59I don't know, we're about to find out.
02:01Tell you who's not excited is plumber Ricky.
02:04Who's got a problem?
02:05What's happened?
02:06Everyone's striving to finish their bathroom and I can't.
02:09Wait, what, what?
02:10Isn't he a plumber?
02:12Yeah.
02:13How has the plumber stuffed up the bathroom?
02:16It's not even sticking to the poly.
02:18Oh no, the waterproofing.
02:20Isn't he a plumber?
02:21What's that?
02:22That primer is not suitable.
02:24He chose the wrong primer.
02:25Oh.
02:27Sorry, is he not a plumber?
02:28You're not going to finish this week.
02:29Oh.
02:30So they're completely screwed.
02:31Well, it's a lesson learned.
02:33They've never done this before.
02:36Ricky's a plumber.
02:38Fair enough.
02:39But plumber Ricky has found a unique solution.
02:42The boys are off to pick up their new builder.
02:44Wait, what?
02:45Their new builder?
02:45They're doing bathrooms.
02:47So they should be getting a plumber, right?
02:48We rolled down to the airfield.
02:52Wait, their new builder comes by helicopter?
02:54Why?
02:55Because of me.
02:57Wait, it's just Phillip Island.
02:59You can drive there.
03:00It's only an hour and 15 minutes.
03:02Eagle has landed.
03:04That's going to be a little bit of a cut out of the budget.
03:06You don't want to hope it's a good builder.
03:07Uh, yeah, it is.
03:08It's Duncan Miller.
03:11They've got Duncan.
03:12Remember him?
03:13Oh.
03:15No.
03:16Now you might remember Duncan from season three.
03:19Nah.
03:19Or as my personal builder a couple of years ago at Gizmo.
03:24No.
03:24Scotty Cam's personal builder.
03:26He will make sure everything gets done properly.
03:29Why didn't you hire him at first, you idiots?
03:31Going straight to the block, are we?
03:33Yep.
03:35Via the pub for one.
03:36Via the pub for one.
03:38I'd love to have a beer with Duncan.
03:40Because Duncan's my man.
03:42All right, so where are we at with the bathrooms?
03:44Like, let's rock and roll, guys.
03:46All right, before we see any finished bathrooms,
03:49let's remind ourselves of who's judging them.
03:52You're unbelievable.
03:53OK, get on with it.
03:58Do the judges deserve an intro every single week?
04:01You're unbelievable.
04:03Yep.
04:03No.
04:04Yeah, I know who they are.
04:05Yeah, fair enough.
04:07Let's check out Jesse and Paige's en suite.
04:10That's beautiful.
04:12I like that.
04:13That's quite classy.
04:14It's clean.
04:14There are a couple of things that I would like to point out.
04:18Here we go.
04:19Why do you do the switching and everything?
04:20Switching and everything outside.
04:22Oh, the stupidest design.
04:26Yeah, I don't like that.
04:27We have that.
04:28We have that.
04:29It is a flaw.
04:30Major flaw.
04:31It's a tiny flaw.
04:32Because how many times have you...
04:33You go for a number one, it ends up being a number two.
04:35And you forgot to turn the fan on.
04:36Someone else on the outside's got to do it.
04:38Big deal.
04:39This is where you fast forward, because this is boring.
04:42OK, Courtney and Grant.
04:47Ew.
04:48Aw.
04:49I really dislike that.
04:51This is beautiful.
04:52Is it?
04:53Next.
04:54Sure.
04:54Let's see if plumber Ricky and his mate have turned it around.
04:58I'm ready to be skewered.
04:59Uh-oh.
05:00Why is that?
05:01What the...
05:04They didn't finish.
05:05That's a huge shame.
05:07Hang on.
05:07Didn't they have Whatsy's face come on a chopper to help?
05:12Look, they're going for like a very industrial, minimal feel with this one.
05:18Yeah, I mean, it would do with a shower.
05:20Oh, this is...
05:21This is bad.
05:22I don't think...
05:24I don't think that's going to win.
05:26Well, surprisingly, no, it didn't.
05:29Because the winner is...
05:30Who is it?
05:31Taking out the win this week is Courtney and Grant.
05:38I don't care.
05:39And in last place this week is the boys with only four points.
05:44For what?
05:45Not even a tile was laid.
05:46There's absolutely jack shit there.
05:48That's it.
05:49I'm glad that's over.
05:50Yep.
05:54God, the people are bad this season.
05:55What happened to the boys?
05:57Maybe they spent the whole time at the pub with Duncan.
05:59Because Duncan's my mate.
06:12Here my little dog.
06:13Here my little dog.
06:14Here my big dog.
06:15Here my big dog.
06:16Here my little dog.
06:17Here my little dog.
06:17Here my big dog.
06:18Here my big dog.
06:20I promise I'll never do that again.
06:22On Wednesday night, we checked out something new on the ABC.
06:25Guy Montgomery's Guymon Spelling Bee.
06:28I like this guy.
06:29Guy Montgomery is so funny.
06:30And he's presiding over...
06:32...Australia's most popular and indeed only comedy panel show about spelling.
06:37So they get funny people to spell hard words.
06:39Who have we got?
06:40Spelling this week are Cameron James,
06:42Jenny Tian,
06:44Tim Minchin,
06:45and Nazeem Hussain.
06:46Spelling bees are always super serious.
06:48This is the complete opposite.
06:50Let's get spelling!
06:52Let's see who's good at spelling.
06:54Mate, I'm a real good speller.
06:56I reckon I'm better than you at spelling.
06:57You reckon?
06:58Try spelling a matala at the age of four.
07:01First up to test their lexical knowledge is Cameron.
07:04Your word is desiccated.
07:08What?
07:08Desiccated.
07:09You can ask for a language of origin.
07:10Okay.
07:11A definition.
07:12Or to hear the word in a sentence.
07:13Why do they need sentences?
07:15It's very self-explanatory.
07:18Explanatory.
07:19Explanatory.
07:20Definition, please.
07:21To remove the moisture from something until it becomes completely dry.
07:25A bit like the time I wore a fedora on a first date.
07:30All right, I'm gonna go for it.
07:31No, let me spell this.
07:32Desiccated?
07:34Easy.
07:34D-E-S-I-C-A-T-E-D.
07:39Nah.
07:40Incorrect.
07:41I'm so sorry.
07:42No, you desiccated that spelling.
07:44D-E-S-I-C-C-A-T-E-D.
07:48Double C.
07:49I don't think so.
07:51Who's next?
07:52It's Nazeem Hussain.
07:54Go Nazeem.
07:55Your word is sherbet.
07:57Sherbet, easy.
07:58S-H-E-R-B-E-R-T?
08:02Yep.
08:02No.
08:02S-H-E-R-B-E-R-T.
08:07Sherbot?
08:08I'm serious.
08:09It's gonna be sherbot.
08:10Watch.
08:10Incorrect.
08:11No, that's sorbet.
08:13Yeah, I'm confused with my dessert.
08:15Sherbot is spelt S-H-E-R-B-E-T.
08:19Yes, it is.
08:20Yes.
08:20Inga, no, I got that.
08:21To be fair, that's not a hard word.
08:23Okay, first round down.
08:25Put your spelling hat on.
08:26It's time for impressions.
08:28What?
08:29Here to assist me for this round is star of Wedding Crashers,
08:32Marley and Me and the voice of Lightning McQueen.
08:34Owen Wilson.
08:34Owen Wilson's here.
08:36Is this Pete Ingram?
08:37No way.
08:41It's Aaron Chan.
08:44Wow.
08:45Hello, Aaron.
08:47I love this guy.
08:48What I just did was an impression.
08:52What's going on?
08:54Is it a quiz show?
08:55Is it a spelling bee show?
08:57Is it just comedians have got nothing else to do,
08:59so they go on this show?
09:01I like it.
09:02In this round, you'll each be shown a picture of a celebrity or public figure.
09:06Your job will be to correctly spell their name
09:08whilst simultaneously doing an impression of their person.
09:12Oh, my God.
09:13Oh, no.
09:15This is going to be good.
09:16I bet you they're going to do Arnold Schwarzenegger.
09:18You reckon?
09:19It's hard.
09:20Oh.
09:22It's the governor himself, Arnold Schwarzenegger.
09:25Well, that's easy.
09:26Get to the chopper.
09:28I will eat you.
09:29Yep.
09:29That's definitely not the line.
09:30All right.
09:31A-R-N-O-L-G-S-A-R.
09:38No, there's no W, mate.
09:39G-G-A-R-N-E-G-G-R.
09:43There's no way that's how you spell Schwarzenegger.
09:45Pretty sure it is.
09:46Incorrect.
09:47Oh.
09:50He's so funny.
09:53If we have to watch this again, can I at least have a lot of alcohol?
09:56Okay, time for the final round.
09:58The buzz round.
10:00In this round, our spellers will spell words of a certain topic,
10:03and they will do so at pace.
10:05I'm getting serious for this.
10:06Exciting.
10:07Go ahead, Cameron.
10:08E-X-C-I-T-E-D.
10:11I-N-G.
10:12Correct.
10:12Oh, E-I-N-G.
10:14Hippopotamus.
10:15Oh, I'm out.
10:16H-I-P-P-O.
10:18T-A-M-O-U-S.
10:20No.
10:21Incorrect.
10:21Does him come special service or...
10:24Lucky they're funny because they're bloody dumb.
10:26I would like to declare the winner of tonight's episode is Cameron James.
10:30Good work, Cam.
10:31We'll see you next time.
10:32See ya.
10:33Bye, guys.
10:35This is really, really good.
10:37Bloody ridiculous concept.
10:39Loved it.
10:39I love this.
10:40It's fun.
10:41Spell Milo.
10:42L-O-S-E-R.
10:45Got it.
10:57Look at that.
10:58I've never seen you with such a tub in like five years.
11:01See what happens when you get a girl.
11:03Like it?
11:03Not hard.
11:05Oh, that feels good.
11:06It's got good...
11:07It's got good sound to it.
11:09Play the drums on it.
11:15A-1.
11:17Thursday on SBS.
11:19This is Great Australian Walks.
11:21Great Australian Walks?
11:22I'm sorry, but any show that starts with Great Australian is targeted at 50 plus.
11:27This is an informative, fun show.
11:29Whatever your story.
11:31Oh, this is the lady out of Fist.
11:33Juliette Samiro.
11:35That's right.
11:36And in this series, Julia takes us on some of Australia's most spectacular hikes.
11:41So she walks around Australia, which I would like to do.
11:43I'd do a walk and talk with Julia.
11:45We love a walk and talk.
11:46We do.
11:47But for this season...
11:48I am sharing the thrill of walking with some friends.
11:52Julia's outsourced her walks.
11:54She's got a subbie in.
11:55And tonight, that friend is...
11:57Look at this.
11:58Gina!
12:00Is she from Alone?
12:01She won Alone.
12:02You know when they go on a door naked and they're alone?
12:05Are they naked?
12:06Or they're alone anyway?
12:08I'm on my way to the highest walk in Australia.
12:11Mount Kosciuszko.
12:12Mount Kosciuszko!
12:13Mount Kosciuszko is beautiful.
12:15Do you know what?
12:16This is what I did as a kid.
12:18Because we did grow up in the Alpine area.
12:21I'm walking a 19 kilometre section of the Snowys Alpine Walk.
12:2519 kilometres?
12:25That's a fair hike, hey?
12:27I'll walk for 19 minutes.
12:28And I'm doing it barefoot.
12:30Bare feet?
12:31What?
12:32It's healing when you walk bare feet.
12:35Ow! Ah! Eee!
12:37That would be so painful.
12:39Conditions can change quickly.
12:40Oh wow, that's me turning around and going back to the car.
12:42That's why I always trek with water, sunscreen, jacket and a hat.
12:47But no shoes.
12:49This place is wild.
12:50It is, it's beautiful.
12:51And I really get a sense that I'm on top of the world.
12:54And the air, smell it.
12:55The air is crisp.
12:57Yep.
12:57And I'm really feeling the altitude in my lungs.
13:00No, once you get the Alpine in you, that's why I like going to Mount Peaty.
13:04Seriously?
13:05Mil, can you go by her and mention her?
13:07She's spiralling.
13:08Hi Gina, how are you?
13:09Who's this?
13:10I've just come from Carrabba's.
13:11Dave Pohl, former Fredbro Ski Patroller.
13:14I hate to say it, Pa was a ski patrol too.
13:16What a view.
13:18How beautiful is that?
13:19We do live in a beautiful country, hey?
13:21Got Mount Lee, got Mount Northcote, Mount Clark in the foreground.
13:25That arrow just pointed at the same mountain three times.
13:28You know a lot about the mountains.
13:30Have they always been part of your life?
13:31My father came from a skiing background.
13:33Yes, so did my dad.
13:35Okay, Mumma.
13:36And so when I was about nine, my dad took me skiing in Smiggins Holes.
13:41That reminds me of Pa.
13:43Oh my God, you're crying.
13:45You're crying.
13:48We used to camp down on the Trudeau River with my parents.
13:53Don't tell me, did he used to fly fish?
13:54He did, he built a lodge.
13:56If I don't come here, you know, I need a fix.
13:59I mean, Dad's buried in the mountains.
14:01We took him up to Mount Beauty.
14:04We're going the whole trilogy now, aren't we?
14:06But as Gina enters the last leg of her walk...
14:09I've got just one small problem.
14:11Oh no, I've cut my foot.
14:13Nature's calling.
14:14She needs a piss or poo.
14:16I'm saying poo.
14:17Well luckily, I have found the highest dunny in Australia.
14:21Oh, how cool.
14:24Please tell me you're putting your shoes on before you go to the bathroom.
14:27Yuck.
14:29The word dunny comes from the British word dunnican, meaning an outhouse.
14:33Didn't know that.
14:34We called the toilet the dunny.
14:36Yeah.
14:36I thought it was just like a word in our house.
14:38No.
14:39You think we made it up?
14:41The original dunny was a simple shack with a wooden seat and no plumbing.
14:45Didn't the Daltons make up the word toilet?
14:47I don't know.
14:48Royal Dalton.
14:49Yes.
14:50No, they didn't.
14:51Royal Dalton, we made up the word toilet.
14:52We watched a documentary about it.
14:54And for Gina's final stop on the journey.
14:57I'm off to meet a man who's experienced major loss in his life.
15:01Oh no.
15:02What's this?
15:03It was just before midnight when the hillside collapsed.
15:06Do you remember that?
15:07The threadballer landslide?
15:08Yeah.
15:09And I remember it just taking over the news.
15:12Two of those people trapped were Stuart Diver and his wife Sally.
15:16Stuart Diver.
15:17Remember he was on TV for like 30 hours while they tried to get him out.
15:20But his wife died.
15:22Wow.
15:23It was a tragedy.
15:25Stuart, I recognise you.
15:28Oh, is this him now?
15:29No way.
15:30Really lovely to meet you.
15:31Yeah, same.
15:32Welcome.
15:33He's the general manager of Threadboy Resort.
15:36Talk about Stockholm syndrome.
15:38Jesus.
15:40You know, people say, why do you still stay around?
15:42But I think to just throw that away because one traumatic thing happened in my life would have been a real loss.
15:48I love Stuart.
15:50Good on you, Stuart.
15:51Mate, what an advertisement for Threadboy.
15:53It'll almost kill you, but you'll want to come back.
15:55What are you getting up to these days?
15:56Are we almost at the top of Mount Kosciuszko?
15:59Oh, I hope so.
16:00Here we are.
16:01Is that the apex of Mount Kosciuszko?
16:03Not quite the top of the world, but the top of Australia.
16:05No, can't be.
16:07It's a bit barren.
16:09That is the most underwhelming, mate.
16:10It looks like a hill.
16:11Yeah, it's incredible, isn't it?
16:13No, not really.
16:16It wasn't a bad show, actually.
16:17I didn't mind it.
16:17Better than what I thought it would be.
16:19Put some bloody shoes on.
16:20Have you ever done Mount Kosciuszko?
16:22No.
16:24On the to-do list?
16:25No.
16:42Mate, we did it.
16:43Yeah, congratulations on winning Suburban District Division Two Lacrosse Grand Final.
16:49We did it.
16:52Thursday night on 10, we checked out some misbehaving mutts.
16:56Ow, ow.
16:56Something needs to be done about problematic pooches.
17:03No.
17:06Dog behaving very badly.
17:08Oh, this can't be good.
17:10I've had my fair share of dogs behaving badly.
17:12I don't know any.
17:13Luckily for us, these diabolical down-under doggos are about to meet their match
17:20in the form of master dog trainer, Graham Hall.
17:24Graham.
17:24He's basically the English Dr. Harry.
17:27If a dog needs help, I'll be there.
17:29He's actually pretty good.
17:30He is pretty good, and he knows a lot about dogs.
17:33Stuffies are really popular dogs.
17:35You get English stuffies and you get American breed stuffies.
17:39Why is Graham dressed up as though he's going to the Logies?
17:41And they sound different.
17:42You know, they're more known for screaming now and again.
17:45Oh, my God.
17:45Really?
17:46Yep.
17:47Meet Cleo.
17:51What is that noise?
17:53Stop.
17:57Oh, my God.
17:58Shush.
17:59I've heard some loud dogs, but nothing quite like that.
18:02Fix it, Graham.
18:03What does Cleo want the most in the world when she's screaming?
18:06She wants to speed up and go that way.
18:08Yeah.
18:08So we're going to slow down.
18:09No, this way.
18:10So as soon as she squeals, they're just going to turn around.
18:12Let's take a step forward.
18:14Yep.
18:16Sloan it. Sloan it.
18:17Go back.
18:18Back to step one.
18:20There we go. Right.
18:23We're going to do nothing.
18:27Good girl.
18:28Oh, that's better.
18:29Dog fixed.
18:31Good girl.
18:32Wow, that's pretty incredible by Graham.
18:35Graham has fixed this psychopathic dog in 30 seconds.
18:39Well done, Graham.
18:40I told you he was good.
18:43Now the dog father's off to meet his next troubled canine, Molly.
18:47And Molly, I'm told, is something of a thief.
18:52Oh, it steals the TV remote.
18:54Hey, what a little thieving bastard.
18:57Stealing stuff out of bags.
18:59Look how fat she is.
19:01I mean, are you Fat Shamer?
19:03Where she is?
19:04This is what happens.
19:05No.
19:06It's a lovely dog.
19:08Molly's stealing money out of wallets and phone covers.
19:11Hey guys, I don't remember ordering 16 packets of schmackos.
19:16Let's see what Graham can do.
19:18I heard you got a thief in the house.
19:19We do.
19:20I've got a couple of tempting things in this bag.
19:22I'll put it down just so I can see what she does, you know?
19:25All right, here we go. Here we go.
19:26What are you doing?
19:27Molly?
19:28Molly?
19:29No respect.
19:30That sounded a bit more like a question than a telling off.
19:33Yeah, so the dog knows.
19:34Molly?
19:35Molly!
19:37Kelly's manner is too nice, too gentle, really.
19:42What would you do in this situation?
19:43I'd just get a new dog.
19:45Or you could get Graham to come up with a solution.
19:48Thanks, Graham.
19:49I think what we should do first is compare how it sounds when you do it,
19:53Cain, to when you do it, Kelly, right?
19:55So drop it.
19:57Drop it.
19:57I think the dad's a bit more assertive.
19:59So let's try a couple more times.
20:02Drop it.
20:02Drop it.
20:03That's not convincing.
20:04You need to yell.
20:05Drop it!
20:06Drop it.
20:06Drop it.
20:08Oh, he's getting excited.
20:09Oh, I can tell from the look on his face there.
20:12Drop it.
20:14Good.
20:14Good girl.
20:16She did it!
20:17Brilliant, Kelly.
20:17Very good.
20:18Drop it.
20:20Oh, brilliant.
20:21Good girl.
20:22Again, Graham solved it in five minutes.
20:24Graham, you are the dog whisperer.
20:26Graham always gets the job done.
20:28Molly's learned a really important lesson today, and it's this.
20:31Your mum loves you, but don't mess with her.
20:34Graham is a magician.
20:36Amazing.
20:37Next time on Dogs Behaving Very Badly.
20:40That is such a nice show, isn't it?
20:42It is good.
20:43He's very good.
20:44He's a dog whisperer.
20:45Having a dog's a good idea,
20:47but I don't believe in something that's ever going to tie me down.
20:50That's the problem when you're engaged, bro.
20:52I just thought about that.
20:54That's why I worry for you.
21:05In Brisbane, Kevin has a new toy.
21:07Riding on the horses, yeah, yeah.
21:12Up in the sky.
21:13No.
21:14Little doll.
21:15Where's your bag, please?
21:16Can we put this in?
21:17You're taking it home.
21:17I'm taking that home.
21:20This week on Paramount+, we checked out...
21:23Last King of the Cross.
21:25The King of the Cross.
21:27This drama series is inspired by events
21:29surrounding the King's Cross kingpin, John Ibrahim,
21:33in the late 90s.
21:35This is like underbelly in Sydney from like 30 years ago.
21:40Well, ep one of season two kicks off in Spain.
21:44Where John's been hiding out.
21:46That's him.
21:46Yeah.
21:47Oh, that is Ibrahim, actually.
21:48He's just grown his hair and a beard.
21:50Looks like Jesus Christ.
21:53I told you to take the binet now.
21:56Oh, okay.
21:57What's happening?
21:59Oh.
22:00Cucaramba.
22:01Oh, take the bin out was code for getting there
22:05so I can take your clothes off.
22:08Oh, my goodness.
22:09What's happening here?
22:11They've started season two with a bang.
22:14Geez, that escalated.
22:21Best coffee I've ever had, Kate.
22:22What do you think?
22:22This is beautiful.
22:23Do you do anything unusual in the coffee, Kate?
22:25Didn't you make your own?
22:26Pardon?
22:29How are you, Hol?
22:29How's work?
22:32Bellissimo.
22:33That was a quick one.
22:35See, I thought it was a marathon.
22:37Later, after John sees his lover in an argument.
22:41This is going to be a blue.
22:42This happens.
22:43It's all on here.
22:52John's been busy in that kitchen.
22:53He had sex and a fight.
22:56Oh, Jesus.
22:59He does look like him.
23:00John then flees Spain, ready to start another fight.
23:04This time, back in Oz.
23:05So he's in the taxi.
23:06He's come home.
23:07He's looking clean, at least.
23:08How much better does he look with a decent haircut?
23:10I liked him with the scraggly Scooby-Doo hair.
23:13John's aim?
23:14To reclaim the cross.
23:16We're at King's Cross, baby.
23:18Oh, that's the Coca-Cola sign.
23:20Every time I'm drunk in the city and I look up and I see that sign,
23:22I think, expensive Uber home.
23:24Yeah.
23:26King's Cross, it's all about strip joints, drugs and pimps.
23:31Oh, and Jehovah's Witnesses.
23:35On the strip, John catches up with some of his crew at one of his clubs
23:40to find out what's been going on while he's been away.
23:43I left you in charge of the venue, Steph, because you said that you could handle it.
23:47I can.
23:49But the scene's changed, John.
23:50It's changed.
23:51Yeah, because it was COVID.
23:53No.
23:54Royal Commission's got the cops scared.
23:56The casino is killing the gambling.
23:57Okay.
23:58We've got new liquor laws.
23:59Dealers are pushing gear right up the streets.
24:01John's lost his power.
24:02Yeah.
24:03What's gonna happen?
24:04I'm gonna get the cross running right, for starters.
24:06How does he think he's gonna do that?
24:08Well, like this.
24:10Oh my goodness.
24:13Why are we always hitting each other?
24:15These guys tried to take John's turf while he was away, huh?
24:18Uh-oh.
24:20Time for you to go.
24:21Spaghetti-o.
24:22Cross isn't your turf anymore.
24:24Santa Claus.
24:26Merry Christmas.
24:27What the hell?
24:28This is why we've got bloody lockout laws, because look at how the boys behave.
24:33Where are the girls?
24:35Nowhere bad.
24:36Swinging around a pole.
24:39Very, very angry man.
24:41He needs to get himself a fidget spinner.
24:43Get rid of his anger.
24:45But it's not just the bikeys that have moved in on John's turf.
24:48We're the gays up on Oxford Street.
24:50Oh, the gays on Oxford Street.
24:51Oxford Street.
24:55A bit more up our alley.
24:57Uh-huh.
24:57Looks like everyone's having a great time.
24:59No man is bothering you there, let me tell you that for free.
25:02Everyone is supportive in the bathroom, the drinks are better and the music is better.
25:05100%.
25:06So John's new aim is to muscle in and take a piece of the Oxford Street pie.
25:11Cash.
25:12The good old days.
25:14Where we went to shit as a society is when we started to not use as much cash.
25:19Have you noticed that?
25:20Said like a true Arab with a small business.
25:24Are there gangsters behind these ones too?
25:26Who are they?
25:27Yes, but they're a little more fabulous.
25:29The barbarians at the gate.
25:31Now that we've got the rainbow family in, we're going to show these ruffians how to do it.
25:38That was great.
25:39This has got me absolutely hooked.
25:42It's just crazy that that's the same city that we live in.
25:45Yeah.
25:45Like we don't see any of that.
25:48We're also not involved in the underworld stuff.
25:50Yeah.
26:05Salivating.
26:05I'm actually salivating.
26:06Oh, would this be your death row meal?
26:08100%.
26:09Yeah.
26:09If I could have any last meal, it would be beef stroganoff.
26:13No, yours Beth?
26:14Tunky beef burger with a lot.
26:16Egg, cheese, pineapple, bacon.
26:18Ma'am?
26:20Um, just a bottle of red.
26:24Magic Mike.
26:26So you hear Magic Mike and you probably think...
26:30Oh yeah baby.
26:31Watched the movie several times.
26:33This week on Foxtel, we watched...
26:36Finding Magic Mike.
26:37You probably showed up here to see naked men dancing.
26:40Yes.
26:41Is this a reality show to find the next Magic Mike?
26:44Not really.
26:45We've searched the country to find guys who feel like they've lost their magic
26:49and we want to help them find it.
26:50So they're just average joes having a go at being a stripper?
26:54Exactly.
26:55Okay.
26:57We're going to judge these guys on their attitude, on their ability to be sexy.
27:00Do they have to measure penis size?
27:02It's not the magic in your pants, it's the magic in your heart.
27:05And the one who finds the most magic inside of themselves
27:08is going to go home with a hundred thousand dollars.
27:10A hundred grand to embarrass yourself.
27:12I embarrass myself with 10 bucks.
27:14Hey guys.
27:15Bring them in.
27:16What up you guys, how you doing?
27:17What's up? Let's get naked.
27:23Hello.
27:23Oh yeah.
27:24Stop looking at the right days.
27:25Oh well it's poking me in the eye, it's a bit hard not to.
27:28It feels weird eating moist meat while we look at moist meat.
27:31You're so right.
27:32Could have been worse, could have been bangers and mash.
27:33All right, you guys ready?
27:34Yes.
27:35We're ready.
27:36Hi, I'm Austin O'Risby.
27:37I live in Atlanta, Georgia now.
27:39Lose the man bun.
27:41Hello.
27:42My name is Johnny.
27:43Yeah, Johnny.
27:44I come from H-Town, Houston, Texas and I'm a lawyer.
27:47Oh, look at that body.
27:48He can defend me.
27:49What magic have these guys lost?
27:51Yeah, they all like have six packs in the heart and look really charismatic.
27:54How you guys doing? My name is Adonis.
27:56Adonis.
27:57I am a nursing student and I'm a flight attendant.
28:00He looks like Adonis, the before photo.
28:02Y'all gonna get this dab.
28:04There's nothing wrong with that.
28:05I don't want washboard abs.
28:06We'll take this dab, bro.
28:08He got six packs, I got 12.
28:11I love him.
28:12I took off my clothes in a body that I'm not comfortable with in front of hella strangers
28:17and I did it.
28:18Yep, get out of your comfort zone, big fella.
28:20Good job.
28:21I'm gonna wake up one day and say,
28:23nobody who this, you know?
28:24Oh, Adonis.
28:26Adonis, you're beautiful.
28:28And now we're gonna see how well they move.
28:29Oh, now we're gonna get him to dance.
28:31Oh.
28:31Here we go.
28:32We're gonna start with a dolphin dive.
28:34What's the dolphin dive?
28:36That's kind of the signature magic Mike move.
28:39Please don't.
28:39Oh, I don't want.
28:41Oh, my knee.
28:42God, I heard that.
28:43I didn't see it, but I heard it.
28:45Where's Adonis?
28:49The dolphin dive in me is not the best of friends right now.
28:53That's a pretty tough move to do straight up.
28:55Yeah, just start with like the two-step or something.
29:03Oh, oh, oh.
29:04What are they doing?
29:05Oh, it hurts, it hurts.
29:07So sweet, I can't forget.
29:09Go, Adonis.
29:11Can you stop sexually assaulting my couch?
29:15First cup.
29:1650 to 25.
29:17I hope Adonis gets in there.
29:19Austin, Johnny Dutch, Giovanni Teran Jones.
29:24Please, I want Adonis to get through.
29:26Number 16, Adonis Frank.
29:28Yeah.
29:30Let's go, Adonis.
29:31Thanks, guys.
29:32Thanks, guys.
29:33The rest of you go back to your day jobs.
29:35You're going home still without a mojo.
29:38And things get harder.
29:39We're going to do some lap dances today.
29:41Lap dances?
29:43Can I volunteer?
29:44I think we should have one of our pros come out and demonstrate how to do it.
29:49Oh, this is going to be a weight.
29:51I would not put my hand up for this.
29:53Pick me, pick me.
29:56Oh, baby, oh yeah.
30:00Oh, baby, ground on me.
30:04In my head, I feel like I look like that.
30:07Yeah, in my head, definitely not.
30:12He's very good.
30:13Put something on her back so she can mop it as well.
30:15Everybody, give it up for Jeremy.
30:19That was awesome.
30:20All right, hit it.
30:21What, they got a copy there?
30:22Yeah.
30:23Oh, good luck.
30:27Oh my God, what's he trying to do?
30:31Oh no, oh no.
30:33Ah, please show some black men who are doing this properly.
30:40Oh yeah, Johnny.
30:41Oh my God, yes.
30:42Where's Adonis?
30:43Give me a dad bod flopping around on that floor.
30:47Adonis, look at Adonis.
30:48Yes, Adonis.
30:49Oh yeah.
30:50Oh yeah, gangbusters.
30:53Yeah, he's got the moves and the grooves.
30:56Bit of pork on the fork.
30:58There's more to jiggle and grab, much nicer.
31:01Take and cut.
31:02As long as Adonis gets through, I'm happy.
31:04Oh yeah.
31:04Yeah, I back Adonis.
31:05Austin.
31:07Johnny.
31:09Giovanni.
31:11Let's go, Adonis.
31:13Adonis.
31:13Yes, yes.
31:16He's in, well done, Adonis.
31:18Set up.
31:21I'm just having a hard time breathing right now.
31:23You got it, Adonis.
31:24The important thing to remember is the magic is in you.
31:29Oh, that was good.
31:30Anything with naked men is good.
31:32Safe to say we'll be tuning in for the next episode.
31:34Oh yeah, definitely.
31:50In Melbourne, Anastasia has a health update.
31:53So I went and had a gastroscopy.
31:55I'm having a gastric bypass.
31:57All my cousins have got my grandmother's body.
32:00I don't know whose freaking body I got anyway.
32:03When children are removed from seeing their parent,
32:08they doubt the possibility of surviving in the world.
32:13This week on Netflix, we streamed a new doco.
32:18Which explores the relationship between daughters and their incarcerated fathers.
32:24Oh, I don't know if I'm ready for this.
32:26They want to be with you.
32:28They want to count on you.
32:30It's so important, the daughter-father relationship.
32:34Hundreds of US prisons have ceased to offer in-person visits.
32:38What?
32:39God, imagine that.
32:41I would struggle so much not being able to like hug dad.
32:45Instead, families are permitted only video visits, which they have to pay for.
32:50See, that's a huge impact on a child, human touch.
32:53Surely that's like inhumane.
32:56But now, these families will be reunited at a daddy-daughter dance.
33:00For you guys, it's a golden opportunity to see your children,
33:03to interface with them, to see your daughters and spend time with them.
33:07This is so positive because it gives them something really important to work towards.
33:13This will help them think, this is what I'm missing.
33:15I'm not going to do nothing silly again when I get out.
33:17What do you think fathers miss out on if they leave?
33:21Everything.
33:23Everything.
33:24It'd be so difficult to be separated from your family.
33:27Can you imagine if you weren't around to see Celia, be Celia right now?
33:31That'd suck.
33:32Santana was actually born when I was in prison.
33:35First time I ever seen her, I had to see her through a glass.
33:37I couldn't even touch her, couldn't kiss her, couldn't hold her.
33:41And then my first time actually ever touching her with Santana was about one.
33:45What?
33:46I first touched his child at one.
33:48How crushing would that be?
33:50I'm sick of seeing myself cry because the stuff that you do.
33:54So next time you go back in jail, you're not going to even share one single tear.
34:01She misses him so much, it just turns into like an anger.
34:04And she probably resents her father for not being there.
34:07Don sheds tears because he want to keep doing bad stuff.
34:13Poor thing.
34:14The daughters are the victims because they're not the ones that did anything,
34:16but they're the ones that are...
34:18They're getting impacted by the whole situation.
34:20My dad is the third strongest dad I know.
34:25Little girls idolize their dads, don't they?
34:28When I don't see my dad, that makes me miss him.
34:31But now I'm getting happier because I'm going to see him.
34:34I'm so nervous.
34:38I love this girl.
34:40Every morning I take her to school.
34:42One morning I wasn't there to take her to school, that was the morning I was arrested.
34:48It's so sad.
34:49I just tell her, like, Daddy made some bad decisions.
34:53And it's natural thought that I'm going away.
34:56These guys have made a few mistakes and it impacts so many other lives.
35:03After a long wait, the day of the dance has finally come.
35:07Oh, shut up, they're getting dressed up.
35:10So their kids won't see them as prisoners, their kids will see them as dads in suits.
35:14This is special.
35:15That's our father's, is that our dad from the hallway?
35:18They've scrubbed up very well.
35:22Here they come.
35:27Oh, hi Aubree.
35:29Look how excited they are.
35:32Wow, I miss you.
35:40Oh, that's Antanna.
35:41She was the one who was angry.
35:43Daddy!
35:46So she would never forgive her dad.
35:48And look at that hug.
35:51I love my dad.
35:54Perfect.
35:54I miss you.
36:00I haven't even done a dance yet.
36:02May I have this dance?
36:04Yes.
36:05Aw.
36:06She is so sweet.
36:08Yes.
36:09Aw, look at them.
36:11This means so much to the daughters.
36:16Oh, they're dancing.
36:18They're having a great time.
36:19You know what?
36:20For this time, they actually get to forget about that they're in jail.
36:23They're just having a regular night, aren't they?
36:25Yeah.
36:27It's so nice that they get to do this, right?
36:29But then you say bye again.
36:31I'll miss you.
36:33I'll miss you too.
36:38I don't want to let you go.
36:41You're going to be okay.
36:42Take three deep breaths and then we're going to say see you later.
36:46See you later, okay?
36:47Okay.
36:48Now say bye.
36:50Oh, I want to hug my dad.
36:54I don't think I've ever been more affected by a show ever.
36:5895% of the fathers in the program have never returned to jail.
37:02Well, that's good.
37:03That's worked.
37:03Such a simple act.
37:05Wow.
37:06But it's so powerful.
37:07It is.
37:08I think the more you can treat inmates like human beings,
37:11the higher chance they are to be rehabilitated when they come back into the real world.
37:16Tell you what, I'm going to go home and I'm going to hug Celia twice as hard tonight.
37:39Can you believe I spent $83.05 on Hungry Jacks last night on Iowa Ham?
37:44Oh my God, Gary.
37:46Look, not my proudest moment.
37:48Learned from my mistake.
37:49No.
37:50Will I do it again?
37:51Probably.
37:53Tuesday on Foxtel.
37:54Low deck Mediterranean.
37:56Yes!
37:57I bloody love the low deck.
37:59Just maybe that one a little bit more.
38:01It's like a look behind the scenes at the cabin crew of elite luxury liners.
38:05Yep.
38:06And on board this season are...
38:08Hyundai!
38:09K-Span!
38:10She's stew.
38:11Welcome!
38:12She's a Kiwi, isn't she?
38:14Yeah.
38:14Is Aisha like the boss on the boat?
38:16No, that would be...
38:18I don't want any crew sleeping in this forward cabin because it has a leak.
38:21Captain Sandy, baby.
38:23Sandy's a pretty good captain.
38:25And fresh on the boat is...
38:27Hello, chef.
38:28The past few charters, the food's been going great.
38:30Chef Joanne cooked for me.
38:32I mean, she is always ready to rise to the occasion.
38:36Chef Jono.
38:38So in this episode...
38:39I have bad news.
38:40We have a medicane, which is a hurricane, in the Mediterranean.
38:43This storm has caused so many issues.
38:45We had two separate leaks and now we're stuck at the dock.
38:48Uh-oh.
38:49We're stuck at the dock.
38:50It's staycation, if you will.
38:51All crew, all crew.
38:52Guests are back to the boat.
38:54Are these the rich people?
38:55Help them!
38:56I'm good.
38:56Are you sure?
38:57Yeah!
38:57Imagine you rented a boat and this was your weather.
39:00You'd be pissed, right?
39:01Well, they will be soon.
39:03Should we do an improv wine tasting here?
39:05Let's do it!
39:05If you want to do it.
39:06Let's do it!
39:07We do improv wine tasting.
39:08It's just whatever's already open in the fridge.
39:10Is that just drinking?
39:11Yes.
39:11It's name means the blood of the stone.
39:13It happened by chance in the vineyard.
39:16I mean, I don't know if I'd start rapping it.
39:17Aisha has some skills that you don't find on a CV.
39:21Get them more pissed.
39:22Or a cruise.
39:23Yum!
39:24That looks fine.
39:25You can drink it all.
39:26I bet it's not a sprint.
39:28Oh, into the fireball.
39:29They drink enough of that,
39:30they won't remember that they never left the dock.
39:32That's the plan.
39:33And now it's...
39:34Party time, baby.
39:36Hey, matey, I want more wine.
39:38Nothing makes you more drunk than being dressed up like a mermaid.
39:41Right there.
39:45I hate it when that happens.
39:49I love balls.
39:51What?
39:51Why?
39:52The softer, the bitter.
39:53Is she talking about the same balls I'm thinking of?
39:56Wow, there's some wear and tear on those things.
40:00She's spoken like a true New Zealander.
40:02And after the guests are suitably...
40:04Wait, put both hands up.
40:06I would love another mojito, please.
40:08Hi, m'lady, can I put this down?
40:10It's time to move to the main course.
40:13We've got tuna carpaccio.
40:15Oh, yum.
40:16It looks beautiful.
40:17I would eat it if I could.
40:19Why can't you eat it?
40:20Because it could kill me.
40:22She has a seafood allergy and they've given her raw fish.
40:25One of the guests, it's on their preference sheet,
40:28raw seafood would kill her.
40:30Oh, yeah.
40:30And it's in front of her plate.
40:32Oh, Jono.
40:33F*** me, bro.
40:35Ooh, sorry.
40:37This is a fireball offense.
40:38And so now I just have to look for a replacement chef.
40:42Oh, she's sacking.
40:43Oh, he's got a sack.
40:44Really?
40:44It's in front of her.
40:45Not the sack that Asha wants, though.
40:47No.
40:49Oh, poor Jono.
40:51But then this happens.
40:55Ooh.
40:56She couldn't get a replacement.
40:58So Jono gets a second chance.
41:00OK.
41:01Coffee.
41:02What's this one?
41:03Octopus and crispy calamari salad.
41:05I'm really nervous about the food they're serving now.
41:07I put a lot of effort into this dinner.
41:09Just really hope they like it.
41:10I just feel something else is going to go wrong.
41:12They're bringing desserts.
41:13I'm hoping it's chocolate souffle.
41:15That's the only request we've had.
41:17Or souffle.
41:19Oh, yum.
41:20Cookies.
41:21If it's chocolate souffle, he's my hero.
41:23It's not chocolate souffle.
41:25What is it?
41:26It's a chocolate cake cookie ice cream thing.
41:30Uh-oh.
41:31That's very disappointing after this dinner.
41:34She's not happy.
41:35Just take it back, because I don't even want it.
41:37You know what?
41:38I don't even want it.
41:39A cookie with ice cream is not fun, darling.
41:43Yeah.
41:43Really?
41:44Really?
41:45She's disappointed in my cookie?
41:46I'm so disappointed in myself.
41:48Jono's had two bad days in a row.
41:52You'll be all right, brother.
41:52She can't sack you.
41:53She's got no one else.
41:54And as the son finally makes an appearance.
41:59Bye, sweetheart.
41:59Oh, my god.
42:00Are they going home?
42:01And they never left the dock.
42:03Get out of our whites into our reds and meet in our usual place.
42:06Tip meeting.
42:07This is where they find out how much money.
42:08How much they get.
42:09We were stuck at the dock, but the crew brought the energy,
42:13which energized the clients.
42:15The tip's great.
42:16$25,000.
42:20What?
42:21Oh, my god.
42:21$25,000?
42:23And the food wasn't up to scratch.
42:25Someone nearly died.
42:26And they didn't leave the dock once.
42:29I love this.
42:30This is fun.
42:30That was fun.
42:31Yeah.
42:32No matter what season, no matter what country,
42:35you know below deck will be good.
42:36Yeah.
42:49Morning with Shannon.
42:50She took me out for brekkie on Father's Day.
42:53She's been doing it for 10 years, Kate, I know.
42:55OK, what did I have then?
42:57Eggs Benedict.
42:58Yeah, I did.
43:00Another week, another controversial Netflix documentary with a twist.
43:07The Man With A Thousand Kids.
43:09That is an ominous title.
43:11This time, we're diving into the seedy underworld of fertility fraud.
43:15I've heard about this.
43:16I've been wanting to watch this for ages.
43:19First, we meet prospective parents Laura and Kate.
43:22We always knew that we wanted to have a family together.
43:26There's only one small problem.
43:27You need a penis.
43:29We knew that we have to source out a sperm donor.
43:31So we started searching online.
43:33Have you ever donated at a sperm bank?
43:35No, I've donated blood, but slightly different.
43:39Cryos is the largest international sperm bank in the world.
43:43They're based in Denmark.
43:44There were hundreds of donors, like hundreds of donors.
43:47Do you get to see who your sperm's coming from?
43:50Yeah, very funny.
43:51And we narrowed it down to one donor route from the Netherlands.
43:55Oh, I would choose him too.
43:57I think he's cute.
43:58Every child looks like that.
44:00Cryos stated that it was fine to import donor route sperm into Australia.
44:05You can import sperm to Australia?
44:08How do you import it in an Esky?
44:12Add to basket.
44:13Like you're buying clothes off the internet.
44:15$2,400.
44:17I feel like I'm wasting two and a half grand a day.
44:20When we first saw our son, I saw Rude straight away.
44:23And in that moment, it was beautiful.
44:26Oh, what a cutie.
44:28So far, so good.
44:29There's a twist for sure.
44:30We knew through Cryos they had donor sibling Facebook pages.
44:36Of course there's a Facebook page for this.
44:38We got a private message that said,
44:42this guy is a serial donor.
44:44He has no intentions of stopping.
44:46Oh my god.
44:48He's just dehydrated, just donating everywhere.
44:51It's like seeing the same version of your own child, just slightly different.
44:57Look at his kids.
44:58Children of the corn.
45:00They're all the same.
45:01Seeking answers, the group tracks down serial donor Rude, aka Jonathan.
45:07Start living your own life and your own.
45:11He's a motivational speaker.
45:12Discover your own strength.
45:14Your strength is masturbating, my friend.
45:16And they discover Jonathan has been a very busy boy.
45:20We could see that he was donating frequently.
45:23There were times when he was coming every month.
45:27He wouldn't have any skin left on it.
45:28And they were going very quick.
45:30So we knew that he was very popular.
45:33Oh my god, that makes me feel a bit sick.
45:34But I thought they were meant to have a limit to how many they could sell.
45:38There's a national limit in every single country.
45:41And what we started to see is that he had reached his quota
45:45in most European countries.
45:48Look at the clothes.
45:49Shut up.
45:50There probably are thousands of children.
45:53Oh my god.
45:54But also, why is Jonathan doing this?
45:57Well, Jonathan's not telling.
45:59But we can be sure it's not to get rich.
46:01There's really no money to be had as a professional donor.
46:06So he's just a full narcissist.
46:08And the more children that he creates in his image,
46:11the more powerful his legacy will become.
46:14They're talking about him like he's a serial killer.
46:16He's a serial life giver.
46:18No, he's a sicko.
46:19But has he done anything wrong?
46:22Well, it's here the story takes a dark turn
46:25when it's revealed Jonathan has a sperm sharing accomplice.
46:28What?
46:29What are they doing?
46:29It's a co-wanker.
46:30They met each other in a parking place.
46:34To do what?
46:35They put their sperm together, mix it,
46:39and give it to the women who wanted to get pregnant.
46:42Oh, shit.
46:43It's a sperm cocktail.
46:45Let's do a sperm roulette.
46:47And see who's sperm wins.
46:48Oh, those poor people.
46:51Yeah, so you know, that's bad.
46:53It's disgusting.
46:54Sick bastard.
46:55There's something that's happened in his past
46:57that's messed him up, right?
46:58I just don't think that's enough of a reason
47:00to go and put your zhuzhi in thousands of women.
47:03Do you know what you do?
47:04You go to therapy, like a grown up.
47:06We all felt a responsibility.
47:09That something needed to be done.
47:10Yeah, like, how do you stop him?
47:12I mean, if anyone's going to solve it,
47:14it's a lesbian couple from Australia.
47:16He really fucked with the wrong women.
47:21Wow.
47:22Mind blown.
47:24I'm going to think about this all night.
47:25I'm going to continue watching it.
47:27Yeah.