Cory Kahaney: Antique Joke Show | movie | 2024 | Official Clip

  • 2 weeks ago
Cory Kahaney makes all the painstaking aspects of daily life ironic and uproariously funny. She's a seasoned comedian wh | dG1fVlNDM1VlQzBWWVk
Transcript
00:00My job is an interesting job.
00:03I was at a party recently, and this woman said,
00:04what do you do?
00:05And I said, I'm a comedian.
00:06And she was so impressed.
00:07She said, oh, my god, I could never do your job.
00:10You have the hardest job.
00:13And I was flattered, but let's be honest.
00:16There are harder jobs.
00:20Alec Baldwin's insurance agent.
00:26It's a hard job.
00:27Taylor Swift's dating coach.
00:31Donald Trump's barber.
00:32That's probably a tough job.
00:35Vladimir Putin's food taster.
00:41Those are hard jobs.
00:43My husband has a very demanding job.
00:45Let me get this out of the way, so you
00:47understand what you're dealing with.
00:48My husband is the assistant coach of the New York Giants.
00:52Oh, oh, he's not on the payroll.
00:58No, he does it from our couch.
01:00It's a remote, it's a volunteer job.
01:09If you're keeping track, he's also
01:11the assistant coach of the Yankees, the Knicks,
01:13and the Islanders.
01:13He's very busy.
01:14I don't know how he does it.
01:16He manages to juggle all of these teams.
01:19It's incredible.
01:21I have a friend who works for the Adopt-a-Highway program,
01:24and they have no sense of humor.
01:27One time I called up, I was goofing around.
01:30I called up, I was like, hi, I'd like to adopt a highway.
01:33But I have a few questions.
01:35At what age do you tell the highway it's adopted?
01:43My sister also has an impressive job.
01:45My sister works for Amnesty International.
01:48Have you heard of Amnesty International?
01:50Everybody was very impressed when she got the job,
01:52and I felt like an idiot.
01:54But I asked her, I said, what do they do exactly
01:57at Amnesty International?
01:58She said, what do you mean, what do they do?
02:00They get people out of Somalia.
02:03And I said, people are going to Somalia?
02:08Who's going to Somalia?
02:09She said, people go.
02:10I said, what happens?
02:11She said, they get stuck there.
02:13I said, oh, OK, and you get them out.
02:15She said, yeah.
02:15I said, you know, you could just go to Newark Airport
02:17and get a big sign that says, hey, stupid, don't go to Somalia.
02:21Wouldn't that say?
02:23But you learn something every day, folks.
02:25Last week, I get in my elevator.
02:26There's my neighbor.
02:27He's got a three-bedroom apartment,
02:29and I'm waiting for him to die, OK?
02:33And he's got luggage.
02:34I said, where are you going?
02:35And he said, Bermuda.
02:36I said, Bermuda?
02:37You should go to Somalia.
02:38That is the hot new.

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