• 3 months ago
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Transcript
00:00There are people who do their jobs normal, and then there are people who do it fast.
00:04Super fast.
00:05Take this guy, for example.
00:06Probably your local Waffle House.
00:07Look at this.
00:08Flippin' an omelette.
00:08Flippin' an omelette.
00:09Boom.
00:10Try omelette.
00:11What was that?
00:11Four seconds.
00:12And this guy, chopping alien fingers.
00:14Look at how fast he's going.
00:15Or this guy.
00:16I don't, I don't even...
00:17He looks like Jesus.
00:18Maybe he is Jesus, because he's going so fast.
00:21And now, the world's fastest watermelon.
00:24I can never cut a watermelon.
00:25I have to get my wife to do it.
00:27Oh, wow.
00:28Wow.
00:28Oh.
00:29Oh, my God.
00:3011.83 seconds.
00:31This is how they fill those little ketchup things at McDonald's.
00:33This guy's nice with it.
00:34Look, he's cutting it off.
00:35Dude, I don't think I've seen a single bit of ketchup drop.
00:38Well, I just saw one.
00:39Right there.
00:40All right, well.
00:40Oh, he's running out of ketchup.
00:41That's why.
00:42I messed with his flow.
00:43Oh, is this how they make toilet paper?
00:44Wait, are you telling me toilet paper comes in a long roll and they just cut it?
00:47I want long roll toilet paper.
00:49Yeah.
00:49What if he doesn't get the dimensions perfect?
00:51What if your toilet paper is wider than my toilet paper?
00:53I'm making a note.
00:54I'm gonna check the length of all my toilet paper at the house and see if they're all the same.
00:57And then if they're not, sue the company for false advertisement.
00:59Ever been to the postal office and they take forever?
01:01Not this guy.
01:02No, not this one.
01:03If this guy worked at the DMV, it wouldn't take so long.
01:05I'm just gonna be honest.
01:06Why even have a human do this at this point?
01:08Like, if it's the same spot over and over again, why not just have a robot do it?
01:11What are you, Elon Musk?
01:12Oh, he messed up.
01:13Oh.
01:14Robot wouldn't have.
01:14Robot would never mess up and work for 24 hours every day.
01:17And get less pay and put people out of jobs.
01:20But then we could have a tax on said robots that support.
01:23You got political.
01:24I cut you off.
01:25Look, they're making pancakes.
01:26What, is this like McDonald's or something?
01:28Do you think this is McDonald's?
01:29McDonald's don't just operate out of tents.
01:31Wait, I don't want some dude without gloves touching my pancake.
01:34He washed his hands at some point.
01:36I don't want a non-glove hand touching my pancake before I numb.
01:39What if he picked a little boogie, forgot, and then just touched your pancake, man?
01:42Now you got nose pancakes.
01:43Oh, McDonald's.
01:45This is a McDonald's.
01:46This guy's killing it.
01:47Look at that.
01:47I hope he gets a pay raise.
01:48Yeah, McDonald's really has automation to the T.
01:51Oh, he's gonna cut it.
01:52Look at that.
01:52Watch.
01:53And then he's just gonna go tap, tap, tap, tap.
01:56Now it's a circle.
01:56Get out of here.
01:57Is this a keyboard?
01:58I think it's glass.
01:59Oh, is this CDs?
02:00Oh, they are CDs.
02:01Those are completely useless now.
02:03What is this?
02:04Look at the people in the background just slowly plucking it.
02:06He's just like...
02:07He's like, I don't care, whatever.
02:08He's doing more work than all three of them combined.
02:11He's not really looking, though.
02:12He's not checking if they're quality.
02:14Sad balloon.
02:14That's how good he is.
02:15He can chop on a balloon.
02:17Blindfolded!
02:17He's blindfolded, Jimmy!
02:19Not only is he blindfolded, he's triple, quadruple, duple blindfolded.
02:22The man's got like four blindfolds on.
02:23This is what I assume to be taxes.
02:25She's literally just tapping random numbers.
02:27No.
02:27I love the transition.
02:28The lady writing down numbers to lumberjack.
02:31He's just chopping every log right in half every single time.
02:34I need to invite this guy over if I want to have a fire.
02:36This makes me want to chop some wood.
02:37How does everyone who chops wood make it look fun?
02:39It's the technique.
02:40Oh, look at that.
02:41They're making pizza.
02:42My favorite pizza place, Domino's.
02:44I don't care if you don't like it, it's good.
02:45Domino's is the only pizza place that doesn't taste like trash.
02:47And it's quick.
02:49It always gets to me.
02:50It's always correct.
02:51Because I got this, man.
02:53Look at that.
02:53This makes me want some pizza.
02:54The advertising worked.
02:56Yeah, it did.
02:56This is just subliminal message to buy Domino's.
02:59Brought to you by Domino's.
03:00Domino's, you can send it to my bank account.
03:02Or just send us pizza.
03:03That's not healthy.
03:04Don't try this at home.
03:05Accidentally inhale water and drown.
03:07Look at that.
03:08Wait, so he's trying to down an entire 12-pack of water?
03:11There's just no way that's good for you.
03:12All right, so he's down what?
03:13Four in a minute?
03:14He's a minute and a half in.
03:15That's seven.
03:16This will be eight at the two-minute mark.
03:18He's got four more.
03:19Sub three-minute water chug.
03:20All right, he's going for the world record.
03:21Last one here, 240.
03:22Can he get a sub three-minute?
03:24We'll never find out.
03:25Life hates me.
03:27On the 11th one, you just disappear.
03:29Oh, I've seen this before.
03:30They jiggle it down real fast.
03:32We should all get together and build stuff like this.
03:34You just want to jiggle with the boys.
03:36I like jiggling with the boys.
03:37And look at that, the post is in the ground.
03:39What are those?
03:40Are those like cow udders?
03:41They're like lotion bottles or something.
03:43If you're not already, hit that subscribe button.
03:45Why are you yelling?
03:46Emphasis.
03:47It worked.
03:47It's an Australian shepherd.
03:49Wait, is he digging a hole for the water?
03:50He's hurting the water.
03:51This dog's better than every single person
03:53we've reviewed so far.
03:55No way.
03:55All my dog does is poop on the floor.
03:57Did I pay a million dollars for this dog?
03:59Probably could just train your dog to do
04:00this for less than a million dollars.
04:02I don't know.
04:02I feel like you don't know how to spend money correctly.
04:04I feel like that's the only dog in the world
04:06that can do this.
04:06More dogs.
04:07Oh my god, look at these dicks.
04:08He's doing a terrible job, but he's trying his best.
04:11The owner was like, hey, stop.
04:13He didn't stop.
04:13He's like, hey, no, seriously, stop.
04:15Look at all the dirt all over everywhere.
04:17I don't know if that was efficient, but it was cute.
04:19You know what's a good time?
04:20Getting together with the boys, going outside,
04:22chucking some bricks.
04:23What are they, building a road?
04:24Let's build a road.
04:25Can we do it in Minecraft, though?
04:26Jimmy, they made a printer for roads.
04:28Somebody needs to tell those guys that were laying
04:30those bricks that this exists.
04:32Yeah.
04:32They spent their entire life mastery
04:34how to lay bricks on a road.
04:36Imagine being unemployed because of a road printer.
04:38I got unemployed because of a printer.
04:41He's either in a fighter jet or a car.
04:42Well, it's a car.
04:43Or a fighter jet with wheels.
04:45Maybe.
04:45No, it's a car.
04:46It's a car.
04:46Are we sure it's not a fighter jet?
04:48Maybe it's a fighter car.
04:49It looks so goofy.
04:50Dude, the camera is struggling to keep up.
04:52This looks like when in Gary's mod
04:54where you would just attach a rocket to a car
04:56because you could.
04:57That was cool.
04:58That was pretty cool.
04:58That probably cost like a million dollars.
05:00I don't know if it was worth it.
05:01Back to real work.
05:02Look at that.
05:03This guy's catching them like they're pizzas.
05:05It's not efficient, but it's fun.
05:07How is it not efficient?
05:08They're not wasting a drop.
05:09What do you mean?
05:10Work smarter, not harder.
05:11Is that a fridge?
05:12That is a fridge.
05:14It's like one of those old style fridges,
05:16but still heavy.
05:17He's just manhandling it.
05:18Just carrying the fridge.
05:19Just like my little boom box heading downtown.
05:21No way he bikes off with a fridge.
05:24If he stole that, I don't think he did,
05:25but if he did, he deserves it.
05:27I could barely ride a bike on my own,
05:29let alone with a fridge.
05:30This isn't a worker.
05:31This is why we will all be unemployed.
05:33Wait, are you going to get a robot to be funny?
05:35On camera?
05:35Uh-huh.
05:36Not for a few years.
05:37I got a few years.
05:38Pancake robot.
05:39They made a pancake robot.
05:41What's it even doing?
05:43It's just stacking the pancakes.
05:44This is our boy Joey Chestnut.
05:46Joey Chestnut.
05:47He can eat real fast.
05:48Joey Chestnut literally has like 50 world records for eating.
05:51I could not do that.
05:52Look at him sweating.
05:53He's got the meat sweats.
05:549,000 calories.
05:56He is honestly a beast.
05:57When we had him eat the world's largest slice of pizza,
05:59I don't know how he did it, man.
06:01I could only eat like 1 100th of it, and I was full.
06:03This man is not human.
06:04Like he's on a whole different level when it comes to eating.
06:06That's insane.
06:07He just ate 12,000 calories.
06:09I eat like 1,300 in a day.
06:11Joey, you're really cool, really nice,
06:13and everything about you is dope, but I just haven't.
06:15How?
06:15How do you eat this much food?
06:16What is that?
06:17Sugar cane.
06:17You don't recognize from Minecraft?
06:19I recognize the tomato.
06:20You recognize?
06:20Why would you slice a tomato towards your hand?
06:22That is dangerous.
06:24Oh, my goodness.
06:25They're so nice with it, though.
06:26Oh, Beast Burger.
06:27I don't care.
06:28Beast Burger's our nationwide restaurant chain.
06:30Go down to the Beast Burger app or order on Uber Eats, Grubhub,
06:32whatever you eat off of.
06:33And we're coming out with new merch for Beast Burger soon,
06:35so check that out, too.
06:36And when you're seeing this, our collab with Dream
06:38has probably gone public.
06:39You can literally order a Dream Burger.
06:41Seriously, gamers, we have over 700 restaurants.
06:43Go order Beast Burger right now from your favorite delivery app.
06:45It tastes amazing.
06:46Those are our burgers.
06:47Those are our fries.
06:48He's literally eating our entire menu.
06:49Dude, those cookies look good.
06:50That looks like a Beast-style burger.
06:52What?
06:52It's gone in 30 seconds.
06:54Dude, that looks so good.
06:55Now I kind of want one.
06:56I wonder if he can even taste it when he's doing that
06:58or if he's drinking so much water it just tastes so watered down.
07:00Yeah, now he's eating our chicken sandwich.
07:02Our chicken sandwich is our fire.
07:03That right there is Carl's grilled cheese.
07:05It's weird.
07:06Carl wanted the buns to be inverted,
07:07so the buns are upside down and it's just a grilled cheese.
07:09I don't know why, but Carl wanted it.
07:11If you're weird like Carl, you'll like it.
07:12The Beast-style fries, gone.
07:14The cookies are so good.
07:15The cookies probably were the easiest part of this challenge.
07:17Oh, and the entire Diet Pepsi for the win.
07:19How is he skinny?
07:20He probably works out an insane amount.
07:22That is interesting.
07:23Joey Chestnut and him, both incredibly talented eaters, are skinny.
07:26You would think they'd be fat.
07:27Come on.
07:28Why?
07:28Is all that tape really that necessary, though?
07:30Then it just makes it so hard for me to get into it.
07:32They keep it so that way you can scan it.
07:34That was mighty nice of them.
07:35He's going to run over a lighter?
07:36I'll tell you what he's going to do.
07:38He's going to light the lighter.
07:39No.
07:39Watch this.
07:40Watch this.
07:40Watch this.
07:41Watch this.
07:41No, I don't believe you.
07:43Watch.
07:43I don't believe you.
07:45Boop.
07:45How?
07:46Because he's nice with it.
07:47This ice cream cone's more beautiful than me.
07:49I've never had a strawberry ice cream cone like that.
07:51Like dipped in it?
07:52Yeah, that looks good.
07:53World's fastest computer.
07:54I thought we just got hacked and somebody was seeing how fast our internet was.
07:58What the crap was that?
07:59I guess if you're talking about the fastest workers in the world, you also got to talk
08:02about the fastest computers.
08:04And what better transition from our computer speed to this guy running on a treadmill?
08:07His legs are almost as fast as that computer.
08:09Fast dog, who cares?
08:10Why isn't the entire video just dogs?
08:12I just don't understand.
08:13It should only be dogs.
08:14Yo, he's a quick one.
08:15Oh, he's speedy.
08:16Look at him go.
08:16Woo.
08:17Man, I wish I could train my dog to do this.
08:18He would love it.
08:19What a happy dog.
08:20Yeah, he's just so happy doing what he loves, man.
08:22We don't deserve dogs.
08:23Oh, this is going to get smushed.
08:25Watch.
08:26Oh, this is going to be so cool.
08:27How is he just standing so close?
08:28Look at that.
08:29That is insane.
08:30Run away.
08:31Is this how they make nukes?
08:32What is going on?
08:33My brain can't even comprehend the physics in that.
08:35But can your brain comprehend bread?
08:37It can.
08:37Is it going to slice the bread?
08:38Oh, it grabbed it.
08:40Why?
08:40Oh, it brea-
08:41Whoa.
08:42No.
08:42All right.
08:43It makes you pita chips for you.
08:44That's cool.
08:45I'd rather have a machine cut my bread
08:46than no-glove pancake guy cut my bread.
08:48What if he also works at McDonald's?
08:49I don't think this is McDonald's.
08:50I don't think you're McDonald's.
08:51What are these?
08:52They're making little wood squares.
08:53They're probably for some kind of, like, toy or something.
08:56But look, it just cuts it.
08:57This makes me happy.
08:58You make me happy.