My stepkids called me names, so I decided to end the relationship... even
though they "immediately regret it" and wanted to stay. Plus two updates.
#redditstories #redditreadings #askreddit #storytelling #storytime
though they "immediately regret it" and wanted to stay. Plus two updates.
#redditstories #redditreadings #askreddit #storytelling #storytime
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00:00My stepkids called me names, so I decided to end the relationship.
00:03Even though they immediately regretted and wanted to stay.
00:06I30F have been married to my husband 34M for six years and he has twins,
00:10a boy and a girl and they're 16 now. When we started dating slash got married we
00:14went to family therapy and I made it clear that I was not trying to be their
00:17mother or replace their mother. Their mother hasn't been in their life
00:20since they were about eight. Things have been great with us these
00:23past six years. They even started calling me mom when
00:26they were around 12-13. Recently their bio mother came back into
00:30their lives and they were really excited. Things were great for about six months
00:33and then they started to call me by my real name, that hurt but it's what they
00:36chose to do and I never questioned it. Recently they've been getting very
00:39disrespectful. They don't follow the curfew rules,
00:42they're not cleaning up after themselves, they're talking back to me
00:45telling me I'm not their real mom, that I'm the reason why she left and she's
00:48back they don't need me anymore. Three weeks ago there was a big blow up
00:51where my son called me a bitch. I took his phone and told him to his
00:54room until his dad came back but instead he ran out and went to his mom's.
00:58She came over and it was a big argument. She tried to hit me and I pushed her out
01:02of my house. My daughter told me if I ever put my
01:04hands on her mom again then she'd kick my ass.
01:07They both went to their mom's place. After that, I haven't been very active.
01:11I usually take them to sports and activities, I don't wake them up for
01:14school so they've been late a few times. I tell them to have their mom wake them
01:18up and take them. We were supposed to go to Disney World
01:21for their spring break this week but I cancelled everything.
01:23I told them and my husband and I guess they thought I was bluffing.
01:26We were supposed to leave Thursday night and when I didn't start the usual
01:29vacation roundup they were shocked. They started saying I was jealous that
01:32their mom came back in their lives, that I'm a horrible person, I'm selfish.
01:36There was some name calling and my husband was silent.
01:38I asked him if he was going to step in and he said I was wrong for cancelling.
01:42I left and went to stay in a hotel. He has been blowing my phone up asking me
01:46to come back and yesterday he told me that their mother disappeared again and
01:49they've been calling me crying and apologizing.
01:51I don't want to do this anymore. I don't feel like I'm part of their family and
01:55they can't just cry and come back now that she disappeared.
01:58I told my husband that I want a divorce and I'll be back over this week to get
02:01my things but we have nothing to talk about.
02:03Yes, I know their mother was manipulating them. I never said otherwise.
02:07Yes, they are 16. That doesn't give them the right to treat me this way.
02:12Being 16 doesn't mean you get to be disrespectful and threaten me.
02:15I have always been in their corner. I know their feelings matter in this but
02:18I am also a person with feelings. I am not only considering or moving
02:22forward with this divorce based on how the children acted,
02:24it is also that my husband did not back me up in this. If I can't count on him to
02:28help me navigate this tough situation that we were all going through,
02:32then why should I stay? That does not mean that I should be treated the way I
02:35was being treated. That is not normal 16-year-old behavior.
02:38To threaten me? Call me vile names? I just need time for myself.
02:43And I don't want an apology just because their bio mother ran out on them again.
02:47I want an apology because they really mean it and I don't believe anyone can
02:50be truly sorry two days after their mother vanished again.
02:53I would never just abandon them. But I do need time for myself because my feelings
02:57were disregarded. Yes, I am an adult but I still have
03:00feelings that were heard and need time for myself.
03:03I never asked or expected them to be perfect. I never expected them to be the
03:06most mature people but I am allowed to be heard and take time for myself during
03:09all of this. They have feelings and so do I. I love
03:13them very much. They are my children but this is a very
03:15complicated situation. This is not because they called me a
03:18bitch. I've been called worse. I'm a woman.
03:20This is ultimately about my husband not backing me up during this situation and
03:24yes, I am hurt that they called me that I'm
03:25allowed to be. It hurts even worse coming from two people who I love dearly and
03:29would never hurt or want any harm to come to them.