• 5 months ago
Taskmaster AU S02 E10

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TV
Transcript
00:00Oh
00:30Hello and welcome to the grand finale of Taskmaster Australia Season 2.
00:42This is the final episode of the series and I am the final man.
00:46When I perish, so will every other human being on this planet.
00:50Because I am the Taskmaster.
00:54Tonight we will see our contestants attempt their final set of tasks and by the end of
01:02this show we will have a series champion for which they will receive this, a chocolate
01:08filled gold foil wrapped statue of my glorious head.
01:13This is my tenth time introducing them and I'm almost sick of it but let's do it once
01:20again for good measure.
01:21Our contestants are Anne Edmonds, Jenny Tian, Josh Thomas, Lloyd Langford and Will Anderson.
01:37And by my side a man who yesterday casually told me that he wishes he had a USB port in
01:43his body.
01:45It's Tom Cashman.
01:46How's it going?
01:47Not too bad, I was just thinking, looking back over the last season, I've been asked
01:55a lot to blink twice if I'm not okay and it occurred to me that's not a very effective
02:00way to communicate a secret message, blinking twice, because you could accidentally blink
02:04twice.
02:05I think the saying should be blink 17 times if you're not okay.
02:09Can you do that, 17?
02:15That was 16 because I'm having a ball.
02:21Ironically also what his sex robot looks like when she's malfunctioning.
02:25Alright, what task is first?
02:29We've got a bit of a weird prize task this week, Lloyd Langford was asked to bring along
02:32something he has never heard of, everybody else has been asked to bring along something
02:36that Lloyd Langford has never heard of.
02:45Probably the best way to get a gauge of Lloyd from Lloyd himself, Lloyd what haven't you
02:50heard of?
02:51I was in a record shop outside of Newcastle and I selected a cassette of music and I couldn't
03:01distinguish the name of the band.
03:05Is that the band name at the top there maybe?
03:07I've looked it up, the band is a Belgian death metal group called Goat Vomit.
03:12Okay, Will, what have you brought in that Lloyd hasn't heard of?
03:18Well it's an iconic Australian television character, this character right here.
03:22Lloyd, do you know who that is?
03:27I don't know who that is.
03:28It is Humphrey B Bear, who was an iconic Australian children's TV entertainer, it was a bear that
03:34wore obviously a waist jacket but no pants and entertained children but the good news
03:37was never talked.
03:41We had a lot of children's entertainers in the UK that didn't wear pants and...
03:49I'd stay silent too if my behaviour was like that.
04:03I was at least 18.
04:06Jenny what did you bring in that Lloyd hasn't heard of?
04:08Throughout this entire series, you know, we know about Lloyd and Anne being married and
04:13Lloyd really loves Anne and I know that Lloyd cares about Anne so much so I have brought
04:19him a manual.
04:21Oh, okay.
04:26If we take a look inside, yeah, well this one's about you being rugged and dreamy and
04:41how you can have that boyish charm for Anne and if we take a look at the next page, you
04:46know, here's how to be a prince among men and I also know that you have a child so there's
04:53a page in there about really teaching the next generation how to, you know, move forward
04:58and model your behaviour so this is the final page.
05:04If I may raise one thing Jenny, they're not married.
05:15And that has really ruined Lloyd's surprise for the end of the show he told me about.
05:21Yeah, well, when I allocate points I might have to factor that in.
05:26Anne what did you bring in that Lloyd hasn't heard of?
05:28I brought in, no nothing nasty, decent shorts because I can't remember which episode but
05:43earlier in the season we had a task that was bringing something that seemed the most shit.
05:48Yeah, and you brought his terrible house shorts.
05:50His house shorts that make me physically sick.
05:53Those shorts that you brought in on an earlier episode were my house shorts and they shouldn't
05:59be seen by anyone else and I have like outside, you know I have outside shorts.
06:08So Josh, what did you bring in that Lloyd hasn't heard of?
06:09Oh yeah, have you heard of, it's an Australian cartoon character, it's called Set It Straight
06:13Shirley.
06:15You wouldn't have, I made her up.
06:16So this is her.
06:19I was worried there for a while too.
06:23What Shirley does is she sets things straight, so what she's doing right now is she's pointing
06:28at just a chess piece holding a sword and another one and another one and another one
06:36and another one and another one and the next thing that she, also and now what Set It Straight
06:45Shirley wants to point at is just some hidden camera footage that one of the producers took
06:51of you saying that you like me.
06:53Just sort of checking, I mean it's not a biggie, just checking by myself, but it's all, it
06:59feels sort of.
07:00Is he worried about it or something?
07:03Oh, just, no, more just me checking on everyone, I suppose, checking, yeah.
07:09Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean obviously I like Josh but it's just funnier to be mentioned.
07:15So...
07:22Anyway, that's Set It Straight Shirley, she just sets things straight.
07:26She just sets things straight, that's all it is.
07:29Alright, this is going to be a tricky one to score because I'm guessing, Lloyd, you
07:32hadn't heard of all that.
07:33I wish I was a child in Australia, I mean, HB Bumble and Set It Straight Shirley.
07:41HB Bumble.
07:45So, I'm going to give Lloyd three points, because he definitely hadn't heard of goat
07:48vomit and I'm going to place all the others around them.
07:50So, I'm going to give Jenny one point because, unfortunately, she got him a husband book
07:55and he's not married.
07:56Yep.
07:57And then I'm going to give two points to Will because he definitely hadn't heard of Humphrey
08:00B. Bear but it was just a little bit boring.
08:04I'm going to give four points to Josh for Set It Straight Shirley which no one had heard
08:08of because he'd made it up, so definitely hadn't heard of that and also I kind of admire
08:13the way you made a task that was supposed to be all about Lloyd all about you.
08:19But five points goes to Anne because Lloyd definitely doesn't know what decent shorts
08:24are.
08:25Nah.
08:26Five points to Anne.
08:29OK, Tom, let's set the stakes.
08:31We're 10 eps in, what is the overall scoreboard looking like?
08:35Well, Anne and Lloyd are in the lead on 149 and 145, respectively, but it's tight enough
08:41elsewhere, the series is still very much up for grabs.
08:43Ooh, OK.
08:45How compelling.
08:47Well, what's first, Tom?
08:48You can have the day off, Taskmaster.
08:50Today I will give myself a hiding.
09:07What's happening here?
09:09No Tom.
09:11He didn't go home, did he?
09:12Can't hack it.
09:13I don't like it when he's not here.
09:15It always means that I'm going to have to do something with a lot of exercise.
09:20OK.
09:26Ooh, there's two tasks.
09:27Ooh.
09:28Take this second task to wherever you like on the Taskmaster retreat.
09:32You must not peep at the contents of this second task.
09:35Your time will not begin until you open it.
09:37You have seven minutes to find your spot.
09:39Your time starts now.
09:40So I don't know what the task is, but I have to find out where the best place to do the task will be.
09:47That's a fun game.
09:52Yeah, that's a fun game.
09:54Yeah.
09:55Let's see where they wandered to.
09:57Who are we looking at first?
09:58Well, in the spirit of this task, I'll leave that a mystery.
10:01I mean, in a way it doesn't really matter where I go because I don't know what the task is in the first place.
10:08I could go into the caravan because there's a seat in there and I could use a seat.
10:13I'm going to go in the bar.
10:17I feel like I might go to the balcony.
10:22Yeah.
10:23I hope it's not a game of hide and seek where I'm supposed to be hiding.
10:27I do not know what this is going to be.
10:29So here we go.
10:30Let's find out.
10:31Avoid being papped by Tom's camera.
10:33Tom has already begun looking for you.
10:35The person who avoids being papped by Tom the longest wins.
10:38Your time starts now.
10:40Am I allowed to close this?
10:47Oh, the fridge is too small for me to sneak into.
10:52Do these shelves move?
11:02I don't know where I'm running from.
11:05This is not the best place in the world to hide, honestly, from a camera.
11:11Do I want to move? That's the question, right?
11:16Are you getting me?
11:17Dammit!
11:18I got you, Jenny.
11:20No!
11:23I feel despondent.
11:24There's a lot of effort to be rigged up with all this cake.
11:28And then be instantly papped.
11:30I mean, it would be hard to beat how badly I have done.
11:34Unless I was hiding literally in front of you.
11:37I'd like to go somewhere shady.
11:41Avoid being papped by Tom's camera.
11:43Tom has already begun looking for you.
11:45The person who avoids being papped by Tom the longest wins.
11:48Your time starts now.
11:56That was quite fast.
11:58I was in camouflage on the ground.
12:01Oh.
12:04APPLAUSE
12:09So you didn't really wander far. A lot of you there.
12:11I had thought back to the task at the dock when Tom was there.
12:16And I was worried about moving too far away
12:19from where the initial task was set.
12:21So I was just thinking,
12:23I'll just stick around here and see what happens.
12:25My theory was literally, I'll get on the balcony,
12:27cos from the balcony I'll be able to see the best of what's going on,
12:30but didn't kind of think through that could also work in reverse.
12:34What was your thinking, Jenny?
12:36I just wanted a good seat.
12:38So, Josh... Yeah.
12:40..I have to admit, that was bad luck.
12:42No, I wanted to go somewhere shady
12:44because there's a lot of people out there holding equipment.
12:47And I thought, if you're going to hold equipment,
12:49we may as well hold it in the shade.
12:51Well, Tom Cashman was under some very shady cloth.
12:54Yeah.
12:55Should have maybe climbed under there.
12:57If I got under the cloth, then I probably could have held you down
13:00and stopped you being able to touch the camera.
13:02We could have had a fun, sexy wrestle.
13:04LAUGHTER
13:06But, no, yeah, we all saw it.
13:09All right, we need some scores.
13:11I papped Lloyd within 13 seconds.
13:15Jenny within 21 seconds.
13:17Will within 30 seconds.
13:19Josh within two seconds.
13:21LAUGHTER
13:22All right.
13:24Right, these four being horrible at hiding from Cashman
13:27and me being an expert in it means that during this break,
13:30I'll take them for a little masterclass.
13:32See you after this.
13:34CHEERING
13:43Welcome back to the Taskmaster season finale
13:46where five comedians are doing their best
13:48to win Goat Vomit's greatest hits.
13:50LAUGHTER
13:51How are they going about it, Lesser Tom?
13:53The task is to pick a spot and then open a second task.
13:55And the second task is to avoid being photographed by me
13:58for as long as possible.
13:59So far, Lloyd has been bad at it, Jenny has been bad at it,
14:02Will has been bad at it and Josh has been really bad at it.
14:05LAUGHTER
14:07Well, the burning question, will somebody be good at it?
14:10It's all down to her. Here's Anne Edmonds.
14:13Well, I'm going inside. Bye-bye.
14:20Bit of behind the scenes here.
14:22I'll go in the make-up chair.
14:25Maybe I'll just touch up my make-up a bit.
14:27I might just join that in the middle. That looks good.
14:30I've got about a Marilyn mole there. That looks nice.
14:33I'll just put that a bit more.
14:36There we go. Now I'm ready for whatever lies in here.
14:42Avoid being papped by Tom's camera.
14:45Tom has already begun looking for you.
14:47The person who avoids being papped by Tom the longest wins.
14:51I think I can, like, get in this cupboard here.
14:58Even if he comes in here, I don't reckon he's going to see.
15:15Now my feet.
15:22Hi, Anne. Hi, Tom.
15:24I've got a lovely photo of you. Yeah.
15:26Have you disguised yourself with a mole?
15:28No, that's just some make-up I've done.
15:30I was attempting to get into this cupboard, you see.
15:33OK. But clearly I'm stuck.
15:35Yep. I've got a few more photos. Thank you.
15:39That's good.
15:41Yep, that's nice.
15:43Yep.
15:45Perfect.
15:51Looks like you did a good job, Anne.
15:53Well, yeah. I followed instruction.
15:56Yeah.
15:58Yeah, so I got into the make-up room and saw that cupboard
16:01and thought, if I can get in there...
16:03Had I been able to... I mean, it was full of mattresses,
16:05so it's interesting that I still went,
16:07I can get in there.
16:09So what does that do for the scores for the task?
16:12Well, Anne managed one minute and 43 seconds.
16:19Somehow that is by far the longest time.
16:22So it's Josh, one point, Lloyd, two, Jenny, three, Will, four,
16:25and the winner of the task is Anne, with five points.
16:31And how are we looking for the episode's scores so far?
16:34Well, the lady stuck in between the couch and the cupboard
16:36is somehow also our leader. It's Anne, with ten points.
16:39OK. I know what's going on.
16:41OK, Tom, let's keep the ball rolling.
16:43This is my line that says a task about pipe dreams
16:46is in the pipeline.
16:52MUSIC PLAYS
17:01Robbie? Hi, Lloyd.
17:03Hello, Tom. Hi, Will.
17:05Ooh, a label make-up.
17:07I've just got some questions for you, if that's OK. OK.
17:09What's your full name? Joshua Thomas.
17:11What's your place of birth? Melbourne.
17:13When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
17:16I mean, I guess my mum wanted me to be...
17:18I know it's very stereotypical, but a doctor,
17:20she wanted me to be that as well.
17:22I think I wanted to be an actor. A teacher.
17:24I may want to be a dog trainer.
17:26A professional footballer, an AFL footballer.
17:29What are you up to?
17:34Oh, no.
17:39Apply for the job of actor.
17:41Apply for the job of teacher.
17:44Apply for the job of AFL footballer.
17:46Most impressive job application wins.
17:50How do doctors apply for jobs?
17:52So they go through medical school
17:54and then they tend to, like, let loose there.
17:56But then they also do, like, that test with you.
17:58They do UMAP.
17:59You know the three things that that tests?
18:01Comprehension, empathy and logic.
18:03I need you to get me a dog.
18:05I'll see what we can do.
18:11So, pretty straightforward.
18:13They just have to apply for the job
18:15that they wanted to do when they were younger.
18:17Who should we see first?
18:18First up, it's Dr Tian.
18:23Welcome to the UMAT exam. Comprehend what that is.
18:25A big pencil.
18:26Correct. Comprehend that.
18:28Banana.
18:29How am I feeling now?
18:30Extremely sad.
18:32Square, square. What's next?
18:34Rhombus.
18:35That is the best UMAT exam we've ever seen in our lives.
18:39My God, I'm the top doctor at the top city hospital
18:43and I have no idea how to solve this case.
18:46I can do this.
18:47I have seen this before from all my partying years
18:51when I was in medical school.
18:54I can tell it's a human body.
18:57And comprehension means that I know that this...
19:03..is a rhombus.
19:05Oh, my God.
19:06She's made the best diagnosis I've ever seen in my life.
19:11And that is my application to be a doctor.
19:17APPLAUSE
19:20So, was that application a gritty reboot of Doogie Howser?
19:24I'm sorry, what is that?
19:30Ironically, it was a program where a doctor who was really young
19:35was good at his job.
19:37Are you not going to ask about the head?
19:41Did you not think to go and reattach it as part of your training?
19:44No, this is the way to be a doctor.
19:47Alright, who's next?
19:48Unlike other boys in rural Victoria,
19:50he had a pretty kooky and avant-garde dream.
19:52He wanted to be a professional AFL player.
19:54Here's Will Anderson.
19:57G'day, I'm Will Anderson
19:59and I'm here to apply for the job of AFL footballer.
20:02I'm going to be no good on the field, but I'm amazing at boasting.
20:06Tom from Taskmaster News, you lost the game today.
20:08Why was that?
20:09Didn't lose the game. Won the game.
20:11Best game we've ever played.
20:12Best game of the season, we won it.
20:13Won it by a lot.
20:14Don't know what you're talking about, you're an idiot.
20:16Also, I'm great at distraction.
20:18Look over there, it's Tom!
20:20See? Amazing.
20:21One of your teammates slept with another one of your teammates.
20:24Good on him. Well done.
20:25That's what we like at our club, bonding.
20:27We're really proud as a bunch to be so close as a team.
20:30Here's what I'm also going to do.
20:31Deny.
20:32Deny, deny, deny.
20:33I've read accusations recently that your feet look a bit strange.
20:37Mm-hm, mm-hm, mm-hm, mm-hm, mm-hm.
20:42I don't have feet.
20:44I'm Will Anderson, and my goal is to be an AFL footballer.
20:59Did I just see Will Anderson do a good sketch?
21:01I think that might have been just what happened.
21:04LAUGHTER
21:06I just saw a sketch, and you made it, and it was good.
21:10Yeah.
21:11Yeah, I mean, I was trying to get inside
21:13what could I do as an AFL footballer these days,
21:15and I took a real, I've got to say, Tom Gleeson approach
21:19to answering questions.
21:21It was real.
21:22I was very inspired by you in the attitude of, like,
21:25whatever came my way, just embrace it, send it back to them.
21:28And I've got to be honest with you, it feels good to be you.
21:31LAUGHTER
21:32It is, it's bloody great.
21:35I know, you get to say all these horrible things and call it humour.
21:38Yeah.
21:39LAUGHTER
21:41All right, I think that was really good.
21:43It's going to be hard to beat. Who's next?
21:45He wants to be an actor so bad,
21:47he learnt a very convincing Welsh accent for this show.
21:50It's Lloyd Langford.
21:53Hello.
21:54My name is Lloyd Langford.
21:56I am an actor of incredible range.
21:58But don't take my word for it.
22:00Here, enjoy my showreel.
22:03Here is action.
22:09Hi-ya!
22:12Here is sadness.
22:15Johnny, you crazy son of a bitch!
22:18What have you done, Johnny?
22:21What am I going to do now, Johnny?
22:23Who's going to look after the kids?
22:28Here is forest-based monster.
22:37Hi-ya!
22:44Here is restless baby.
22:54Here is pornographic film star.
22:57Ma'am, your dishwasher is fixed.
23:00Oh, thank you so much, mister.
23:02How could I ever repay you?
23:05Well, I got some ideas.
23:11That was just a small taste of the many different acting styles
23:17that I, Lloyd Langford, am capable of.
23:20If you need an actor, I'm your man.
23:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
23:28To be honest, I just loved it cos we got to hear you say
23:32here over and over again.
23:34I mean, it was an absolute treat.
23:36Let's play a game now.
23:37Say this word, here.
23:39Here.
23:40Here.
23:41Here.
23:42Here.
23:43Here.
23:44This is no just televised racism.
23:51Welcome to Australia.
23:57Now for you at home to do the most important job of all,
24:00sit through advertisements while you wait for us to return.
24:03We're back soon with more job applications on Taskmaster.
24:17Welcome back to the Taskmaster season finale
24:20where tonight one comedian will take home the big prize
24:23and another will take home Humphrey B Bear,
24:26or as Lloyd Langford calls him, miscellaneous yellow fedora bear.
24:30Tom, what's going on?
24:32Our contestants are trying to land their dream jobs
24:35via video applications.
24:36OK, who's next?
24:37She wanted to be a teacher, so let me be the first to say,
24:40good morning, Miss Edmund.
24:43Principal Cashman, thank you so much for seeing me.
24:47Thanks for coming in, Mrs Edmund.
24:49Thank you, no problem.
24:50The main thing I think we're missing a lot in the education system today
24:54is discipline.
24:55OK.
24:56I've got a little student here, that's Phil there,
24:59and he's been a very naughty boy.
25:01One of the best things I could do as a teacher
25:03would be to give you a little demonstration
25:05of how I would approach this situation.
25:10Hey, Phil, how's it going?
25:12Good, thanks.
25:13You're going to be doing Phil as well?
25:15Yep, if you could not interrupt.
25:17Oh, sorry.
25:18Where were you, Phil, yesterday?
25:20Where were you, buddy?
25:21Where were you?
25:22I was up the back.
25:23No, you weren't.
25:24You weren't up the back, Phil.
25:26I was.
25:27You were.
25:28Oh, what's that smell?
25:29Haven't had a few darts, have we?
25:31No, my dad smokes.
25:32You don't even have a dad.
25:34We don't need scum like you, Phil, messing up my perfect record.
25:38Now I've got a little black stain on my record,
25:41a little Phil stain.
25:42Anybody got a little Phil stain?
25:44So that's more or less my application.
25:47Thanks, Principal Cashman.
25:49Thanks a lot.
25:54Ann, I'm not surprised to say that was disturbing.
25:59I mean, it's a job application.
26:01Yes.
26:02And, I mean, I enjoyed it as entertainment,
26:04but I would not send my children to your school.
26:07I've met your children.
26:08You probably should.
26:10Oh!
26:15My children will watch this show, they'll be like,
26:17yeah, fair enough.
26:19Alright, anyone left?
26:20This old dog wants to learn a new trick
26:22and that trick is teaching tricks to dogs.
26:24It's Josh Thomas.
26:26Ladies and gentlemen,
26:28please welcome the amazing Josh and Phoebe.
26:32Today, for your amazement,
26:34the very good Phoebe will jump through a hoop
26:38for our first trick.
26:40We will remove the leash from the dog
26:42and the dog will not go back to its owner.
26:49Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
27:08Yes!
27:10Phoebe.
27:16So, this is a job application?
27:18Yeah.
27:19Featuring footage of you doing that job poorly.
27:22Yeah.
27:24We did spend probably 24 minutes
27:27teaching Phoebe to jump through a hoop
27:29and she jumped through hoops not on the show, though.
27:33Right.
27:34And I, you know, what I've always said,
27:36Phoebe.
27:39No, this is definitely the task I've been the saddest about.
27:44I really believed I was going to pick a dog,
27:47teach it to jump through a hoop and we'd win a Logie.
27:51Well, if it makes you feel any better,
27:53I've got some secret footage of the dog saying that it likes you.
27:56LAUGHTER
27:58I definitely love that.
28:00No, I love that.
28:02Alright, well, I need to hand out some scores.
28:04You do?
28:05It's pretty easy. I think Anne's on one.
28:07Her application was her doing the job badly.
28:09Josh is on two. Same.
28:11I'm giving three points to Jenny because the head fell off.
28:14I'm going to give four points to Lloyd
28:16because I just like hearing him say here over and over again.
28:20But five points to Will Anderson
28:22because the Will Anderson Sketch Show finally has a good sketch!
28:26Finally!
28:28Alright, keep the task coming, Lesser Tom.
28:31Well, you might not be calling me Lesser Tom for long
28:34because in this task I debut a brand-new nickname.
28:49Where is he? Where is the little fella?
28:52Into the caravan!
28:54Hello, Tom. Hi, Will.
28:56How are you? I'm OK.
28:58How are you? I'm well.
29:00I just did a coffee poo. How are you?
29:02Thanks for telling me. Yeah.
29:06Throw something at Tom.
29:08You must announce your throw by yelling...
29:10Hey, fun boy. Hey, fun boy.
29:12Hey, fun boy. I like this already.
29:14If Tom catches your throw, you will be disqualified.
29:17If the Taskmaster deems your throw to be uncatchable,
29:20you will be disqualified.
29:21Most unco dropped from Tom wins!
29:24You have until the end of today's filming.
29:26Mm. Your time starts now.
29:28Man, this is like a fun task.
29:31Chucking stuff at me?
29:32I'm not going to hurt you. OK.
29:34I promise you, I will not hurt you.
29:39I'm not going to call you Fun Boy, by the way.
29:42Were you wanting it to catch on?
29:44If it didn't kill you.
29:46All right, Fun Boy, who are we going to watch?
29:52They're my joint favourite contestants for this season.
29:55It's Anne, Jenny, Josh, Lloyd and Will.
29:58Your time starts now,
30:00but I must announce my throw by yelling,
30:03Hey, Fun Boy. Hey, Fun Boy!
30:06Is that...? Is that it?
30:08Oh, wait, did I only get one? Yeah.
30:10Oh, no!
30:14Hey.
30:16Hi, Josh.
30:18Bungay.
30:22Hello. Hi, Anne.
30:24How are you? I'm OK.
30:26Hey, Fun Boy.
30:28Ah.
30:30Right. What's happening with you? Oh, OK.
30:32When the time was up, I sat up,
30:35I saw you immediately and I took this beautiful photo.
30:38Hey, Fun Boy.
30:42All right, I'm going to be back.
30:46Hey, Fun Boy.
30:49OK, good.
30:52Do you think that was uncatchable?
30:54Hey, Fun Boy.
30:56Yeah.
30:58I think it was catchable.
31:00You think that was catchable?
31:02Bungay.
31:04You almost got it.
31:06Mm, I got a hand on it.
31:08Hey, Fun Boy.
31:10Sorry, Tom.
31:12That's OK.
31:14Hey, Fun Boy.
31:20APPLAUSE
31:25Brutal for me, this one.
31:27This one had the potential for me to make some classic catchers in.
31:31And I made zero catchers.
31:34All right.
31:36Well, I have to rank them, don't I,
31:38in terms of how uncoordinated they make you look?
31:40Yep.
31:42Well, I'll give Anne one point because it just flew straight past you
31:44and you didn't even react to it,
31:46so you just looked like you missed it.
31:48And same goes for Jenny.
31:50It was sort of so quick, it just sort of flung in front of you
31:53and you just didn't even react.
31:55And then I want to give Josh three,
31:57but I can't because he didn't say, hey, Fun Boy.
31:59He didn't say it.
32:01Yeah, so Josh is disqualified.
32:03OK.
32:05No, it's fair, I didn't say it.
32:07I don't get why people keep feeling sorry for you
32:09when you lose points because you don't follow the rules.
32:13But I can't quite decide.
32:15I think that Lloyd and Will both made you look pretty unco, beautifully.
32:19Do we have a side-by-side?
32:21You reckon? Absolutely, yeah.
32:23OK, shall we have a little look?
32:33All right, that's easy.
32:35Four points to Lloyd, five points to Will.
32:43OK, time for me to be a less-than-fun boy
32:45and let you know that it's ad time.
32:47See you soon with more season finale madness after this.
33:01Welcome back to the Taskmaster Grand Final.
33:04We're not far away from finding out who will walk away
33:07with shorts that are far too fancy for Lloyd Langford.
33:10Tom Cashman, do you have another task for us?
33:13Yes, and I'm sad to announce this is the last proper task
33:16of the season, as this is the last time our contestants
33:19will see any action on the field.
33:21I thought we should all see some collaboration.
33:37Hey, Tom. Hi, Will.
33:39Villain. Ooh, hero!
33:42Hello, Tom. Whoa!
33:44Hi, Josh.
33:50Ooh! This is so exciting!
33:53The action film must have a script.
33:55A hero. A villain.
33:57Music and sound effects.
33:59Your job on the action film is written on your chair.
34:02Best contribution to the action film wins.
34:05You have 45 minutes.
34:07Your time starts now.
34:10Sound effects. Oh, my God, I'm the hero!
34:13Villain. Composer.
34:15Scriptwriter.
34:16I'm really into, like, old kind of kung fu type films.
34:20Do you have a script? Would you like a script?
34:22It seems useful.
34:23It's an original by Lloyd Langford. No!
34:27You haven't even read it yet.
34:29I just know Lloyd's going to come up with something underwhelming.
34:35Jimmy and Timmy Wolfe were two of the best scouts
34:37in the Shaolin Scout Troop.
34:39Did Lloyd write this? I can tell.
34:41The more I read the script, the less I sort of understand.
34:44OK.
34:45But the troop leader, Master Keith Snake,
34:47was always pushing them to the limit.
34:49And this is very case.
34:50Keith Snake disappears in a puff of smoke.
34:54I feel like I'm going to have to do a training montage.
35:01Jimmy whittles. Whittles?
35:03Yeah, like, carves bits of wood.
35:06Jimmy uses his scout skills to fight these punks.
35:11They try to kick him, but he furiously shines their shoes.
35:16Did someone say something about a voice alterer?
35:19Ah! Ah!
35:23Punches. Kicks. Headbutts.
35:28Bit of ear nibbling.
35:32Jimmy grabs a towel off the bar,
35:34wraps it around Keith's neck in a knot.
35:38Tightens it and kills him, and that's the end.
35:41What's this film called?
35:43I was thinking of calling it Unholy Fists of the Very Aggrieved Scout.
35:47Because I only have a small part, I've got to go big.
35:50OK.
35:51All right, well, I think, let's get into it.
35:53I can't wait to see my vision brought to life.
36:02OK, so I think we really want to see how this all came together
36:06What am I looking out for?
36:08You're looking out for the best contribution to the short film.
36:10The best contribution. OK.
36:12And they're coming at it from all angles.
36:15All right, let's have a look.
36:16This is the Unholy Fists of the Very Aggrieved Scout.
36:26Jimmy and Timmy Wolf were two of the best scouts
36:29in the Shaolin Scout Troop,
36:31but the troop leader, Master Keith Snake,
36:34was always pushing them to the limit.
36:36I'm not sure I can tie this knot, Jimmy.
36:38If you can't do it, that's OK, brother.
36:40You're Lord Dog, you have to tie the knot yourself
36:44or you will not get your knot badge.
36:51Do something! He will surely perish!
36:54I cannot get involved.
36:56Let the test masters assist, don't I?
36:59I am but a neutral observer.
37:05Oh!
37:09Avenge me, brother.
37:11And maybe try for a badge other than knots.
37:23So, what are you looking for in a partner?
37:26I am not looking for a partner.
37:28I am looking for an evil scout leader
37:31whose callous behaviour allowed my brother to die painfully.
37:35And I will avenge him.
37:53Boing!
37:56Ah!
38:00I wish you'd put that in your bio.
38:02Hey, mate, we don't like guys coming in here
38:05and misrepresenting themselves in their dating bios.
38:08What are you going to do about it?
38:10We're going to kick your puny ass.
38:12Scouts' honour prohibits violence,
38:14but these shitheads are going to get a good punching.
38:19Ah!
38:26Ouch!
38:38Oh, that was painful.
38:40Ha! Ha! Ha!
38:52What is with all this commotion?
38:58Who is honking on the fire?
39:01Who?
39:03Who is this man
39:07with his shiny shoe?
39:12I have hunted for you for two decades.
39:14I have earned every scout badge but one.
39:17You killed my brother.
39:19I am here to avenge his death.
39:21I will kill you and dance on your grave and piss on your bones!
39:24Ah!
39:30Ha! Ha!
39:33Ha! Ha!
39:37Ow! My ears!
39:39I use those for listening.
39:41Ah! Ow!
39:43Ha! Ha! Ha!
39:45Ha! Ha! Ha!
39:50Ah!
39:56Ah!
40:00I think you finally deserve this.
40:06Maybe we should go on a second date.
40:10Two little twins in the middle of the night
40:13A long, big swede who's looking for a fight
40:16He killed his brother, their poor mother
40:19I can hear her screaming
40:24Screaming
40:27She's screaming
40:30She's screaming
40:33Unholy kiss of the very aggravated scout
40:38Unholy kiss of the very aggravated scout
40:41Scout, scout, scout, scout, scout
40:44Ow!
40:57I think we've found another recurring character
40:59for the Will Anderson sketch show.
41:02You know what the best thing about it is?
41:04I refuse to get out of character all day.
41:07Like, real method.
41:09We'd only talk to the crew in that accent that would just go through.
41:13It was good fun day.
41:15Well, you've all made a great film
41:17but I'm capable of creating drama and tension myself.
41:20I'm going to tell you who won that one after the ad break.
41:23See you soon.
41:33Welcome back to Taskmaster Australia.
41:36Right now we're having a filmmaking award ceremony.
41:39Yeah, the shitty Oscars.
41:42Also known as the Shoscars.
41:45Also known as the Logies.
41:48That's right, we just saw the world premiere
41:50of The Unholy Fists of the Very Aggrieved Scout
41:53produced by these five right here.
41:55Yeah, and I've got to pick the most outstanding contribution
41:58but I feel like I didn't see enough of Anne and Josh
42:00because they're a bit more behind the scenes.
42:02Totally.
42:03So let's have a peek behind the scenes and maybe see their work.
42:05OK.
42:06Jimmy and Timmy Wolf were two of the best scouts
42:09in the Shaolin Scout Troop.
42:18Boing.
42:20Not again, what's that?
42:22I will kill you and dance on your grave and piss on your bones!
42:26Ah!
42:28It's mostly punching noises.
42:34Ah!
42:35No, that's not too much.
42:36HORN BLARES
42:40HORN BLARES
42:46OK.
42:47Thanks, Josh.
42:48Thank you.
42:50Terrible movie written by Lloyd.
42:54Well, I guess I should come up with some scores.
42:57So I'm going to give one point to Lloyd
42:59because the script was...
43:03Lloyd, everyone else in the production complained about it.
43:08So one point to Lloyd.
43:09I'm giving two points for Will Anderson's recurring character
43:12that's coming up in his brand-new sketch show.
43:15I'm giving three points to Jenny for a wonderful performance.
43:19It held the whole thing together.
43:21Four points to Anne Edmonds for the original score.
43:24All that music was done by Anne.
43:26And five points for the beautiful sound effects of Josh Thomas.
43:33Let's have one last look at those episode scores
43:35before we wrap this thing up.
43:37Well, there's two points in it at the front,
43:39but Will has Anne slightly beaten
43:41with his score of 18 points for the episode.
43:48All right, contestants, I hate to see you go,
43:51but I love to watch you leave.
43:53So let's wrap on that stage for one last live task.
44:01What's going on here, Lesser Tom?
44:03Contestants, please turn around.
44:07Mmm!
44:09Oh!
44:11Oh!
44:13Oh!
44:14Why are you all making noises like you know?
44:16You don't know?
44:17Please read the task. I don't know.
44:19Build a marshmallow towel using the remaining marshmallows
44:22that you've had in your green room
44:24since the start of the studio record.
44:32Paulus Tower wins. You have three minutes.
44:35Lloyd!
44:36Your time starts on Tom's whistle.
44:40Did you like the marshmallows, Will?
44:44I was going to take the rest home with me!
44:48And I almost did that before we recorded this!
44:53Lloyd, would you like to explain what's happened here?
44:59I spoke to the director of the series and I said,
45:04I've got this giant jar of marshmallows in my room,
45:07I would like to replace them with a jar of fruit.
45:13How long have we got? Three minutes.
45:15From...
45:16WHISTLE BLOWS
45:29Did you ask for any specific fruit, Lloyd?
45:31All I can see here is mandarin.
45:36Two minutes left.
45:4190 seconds.
45:43Just pouring them out.
45:46I really thought it would balance.
45:4830 seconds left.
45:51Oh, my God.
45:54Yeah, thank you.
45:55Ten seconds.
45:56Five, four, three, two, one.
46:01Hands off.
46:07Lloyd!
46:09Lloyd!
46:10I'm so sad!
46:12Oh, wow, look at Lloyd!
46:13Wow.
46:14For all those kids watching at home, fruit is good for you.
46:19All right.
46:20We'll find out the winner of the live task after this.
46:33Welcome back to an emotional final part of the final episode
46:37of Taskmaster Australia Season 2.
46:39We've got some winners to get to, Lesser Tom,
46:41so how do the scores look?
46:43The lowest height was Anne, with 10.2cm.
46:46Josh got to 11.9cm.
46:48Will got 13.6.
46:50Jenny stacked 15.5.
46:52But on his healthy high horse, Lloyd got 33.5cm.
47:00That means, for this episode,
47:02the winner is Will, with a total of 21 points.
47:06Congratulations, Will.
47:08Go and get your valuable stuff that holds no value to Lloyd.
47:14So what have we learnt from this episode?
47:16Hey, fun boy.
47:29Good on you, Will, for winning it.
47:31Give him a big hand.
47:36APPLAUSE
47:43All right, we made it to the end.
47:45Some doubted us even more than Will's parents doubted him.
47:49But we did it.
47:50We survived, even after all the throwing, catching, hiding
47:54and shit-shovelling that was Season 2.
47:57I'm proud to say we have a winner.
48:00So, Lesser Tom, who is that winner?
48:03In a commendable fifth place, on 138 points, it's Josh Thomas.
48:11In a slightly more commendable fourth place, on 142 points,
48:15it's Jenny Tian.
48:19Then up in third, on 154 points, Will Anderson.
48:27But overall, the winner is love,
48:30with no joke, on 161 points, a tie between Anne and Lloyd.
48:35Oh, no.
48:38Oh, no.
48:42This means we have a first on Taskmaster Australia.
48:46We have a season tie.
48:48Oh, no.
48:50What does it mean? Yes, what happens?
48:52We have a season tie breaker.
48:54So I'm going to give you both a pen and paper
48:56and then I'm going to ask you a question.
48:58You have 30 seconds to write your answer to the question
49:00on your piece of paper and we're going to see who gets the closest.
49:03I can't write.
49:06Oh, it's B.
49:08This is for the season? One question for the season?
49:10That's right.
49:12I was expecting a giant piece of paper.
49:17How much does the Taskmaster trophy weigh?
49:21Please write down your answers.
49:29OK.
49:31You finished?
49:37Please hold up your answers.
49:39What does yours say, Lloyd?
49:413.6 kilograms.
49:43What does yours say, Anne? Seven kilograms.
49:46Let's look at the tape.
49:49No.
49:51No.
49:581.621 kilograms.
50:01Which means Lloyd is the winner.
50:03Yay!
50:07Well done, mate.
50:11Congratulations. You win my head.
50:14All right, truly ridiculous.
50:16Congratulations to Lloyd. Good night!
50:21Thank you.
50:27Let me feel it!
50:47Is it very nice?
50:49Hi, Tom.
50:51I think I'm having an aneurysm.
50:55There we go.
50:57F*** you!
51:01Oh, no! Tom!
51:03Come on!
51:05Oh, God!