Bill and Teds Excellent Adventures Staffel 1 Folge 11 HD Deutsch

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Transcript

00:00I had been selected for a most important journey.

00:05I was to help fulfill the destiny of the two great ones, Bill and Ted.

00:10Wild stallions rule!

00:13Whenever times change and trouble moves too fast

00:20To save the future we must learn about the past

00:26Whoa!

00:31Whoa!

00:34Excellent!

00:36Bill and Ted, excellent adventures, most outstanding every day

00:42It's outrageous, so gaudacious, help is always on the way

00:49Bill and Ted, excellent adventures

00:53It's a party, that's for sure

00:56Bill and Ted's most excellent adventures

01:01Most triumphant!

01:16I don't know what to do with you boys anymore.

01:19Give us straight A's and send us home early.

01:21You got the second part right.

01:26All right, dude. Let's motor before he changes his mind.

01:29Just don't bother ever coming back.

01:34Good fortune has smiled down upon us, Ted. We are finished with school.

01:38You got that backwards. School is finished with you.

01:41That's right, guys. You're expelled.

01:46Bill, this is as heinous as it gets.

01:49If my dad finds out I'm expelled, he'll kill me.

01:53Your parents will get notices in the mail this week.

01:56Isn't there anything we can do? Something really big.

02:00Believe me, Mr. Ryan, you do not want Ted's demise on your conscience.

02:04Well, tomorrow is career day.

02:06I don't suppose you boys have lined up a speaker like you were supposed to.

02:10No, but that is because we have been working on someone totally outrageously special.

02:14Oh? Who have you got in mind?

02:20Smokey the Bear?

02:22See what I mean? I'm just wasting my time here.

02:26Give us a chance, Mr. Ryan. We will find a most awesome speaker.

02:30All right. But understand, the letters have already been written.

02:34They just have to be mailed.

02:36We will not let you down, Mr. Ryan. Count on it.

02:39Come on, Ted. Ted?

02:41What?

02:42Come on, dude.

02:44Ted, my catatonic friend, if we get expelled, we are two dead dudes.

03:04Hey, maybe we could get your dad to speak at career day.

03:07Then instead of wasting our time here, we could get your dad to speak at career day.

03:11Hey, maybe we could get your dad to speak at career day.

03:14Then instead of killing you, he would be unwittingly saving your life.

03:17My father? Surely you are kidding.

03:24Sorry, dude. I must not have been thinking.

03:27Who can we get to speak?

03:29Unfortunately, Janet Jackson is on tour.

03:32Whoa, she would have gone over well.

03:34There must be someone we can get who will impress Vice Principal Ryan.

03:38Whoa. How about the President of the United States?

03:41He might be interesting.

03:43I think he is too busy being President, dude.

03:46Oh, let us face it. It is useless.

03:49I am one deceased duck.

03:51Not true, Ted.

03:53What about those statuesque dudes on Mr. Ryan's desk?

03:57Right. Shakespeare and that Mark Twain dude.

04:00Oh, but they are dead, like I am about to be.

04:04Not for us. We can go back in time, bag one of them,

04:07and be reinstated on Mr. Ryan's most honorable list.

04:10Excellent!

04:35Whoa!

04:43Ted, we are just in time for the gala premiere.

04:46Let us buy tickets.

04:48First, let us buy refreshments.

04:53I'll take a medium popcorn with butter.

04:55I make it fresh, not yesterday's.

04:57And I'll have some of those candies that stick to your teeth

05:00and glue your mouth shut.

05:02I know not of what foodstuffs you speak.

05:04I sell only fish and chips.

05:08Ew, fish.

05:10Oh, well, it is Brainiac food,

05:12and we could certainly use some of that.

05:14How much?

05:16Two guineas.

05:21I don't have any small furry animals, Ted. Do you?

05:24No, I do not.

05:28No cash, no tickets.

05:31No cash, no chair.

05:36Whoa, what a rude dude.

05:38Forget it, Bill.

05:40We'll buy some munchies at the snack bar in the theatre.

05:48How goeth the ticket sales for opening night?

05:51Verily, it is almost a sell-out, Mr. Shakespeare.

05:54Superb! I...

05:57What is Yod and Scenery doing out there?

06:00Hushers, get that on the stage.

06:08Always something.

06:13How mayhaps may I be of service to you two gentlemen from Verona?

06:20We are from Sandimus.

06:22Yeah, and we would like to speak to that most famous Mr. William Shakespeare.

06:25Sorry, no interviews until after the performance.

06:30All right, then we would like two of your best tickets to the show.

06:33Nothing in the balcony. I get nosebleeds.

06:36That will be two pounds.

06:38Heavy.

06:46That should about cover it.

06:50What manner of money be this?

06:53Counterfeit, methinks.

06:56Stop, thou most foul and base knaves!

06:59Perhaps if the play gets good reviews,

07:01we'll be able to convince Mr. Shakespeare to speak at career day.

07:04Hushers, stop those two scoundrels!

07:09Bill, I do not think these big ugly dudes want to show us to our seats.

07:13I concur 100% with you, Ted, my friend.

07:17Look, it's Bart Simpson!

07:23I can't believe they looked.

07:28Hey!

07:30We'll ditch them back here, dude.

07:34I don't come as back here.

07:36Ted, just like most odious gym class.

07:39But Bill, I have never been able to get more than two feet off the ground on one of these things.

07:53Where couldst they have gone?

07:58But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?

08:02It is the east.

08:06And Juliet is the sun?

08:08We should ask for our money back, Bill.

08:10We specifically ask not to be seated in the balcony.

08:13Psst, Juliet, your line.

08:16Us? Juliet?

08:18Psst, Juliet, your line.

08:20Us? Juliet?

08:22No way!

08:23Right, I am Bill Ospreston Esquire.

08:26And I am Ted Theodore Logan.

08:28And together we are...

08:30Wild Stallions!

08:35What means this Wild Stallions?

08:37Who are these Bill and Ted?

08:39Where's Juliet and Abe?

08:42Yeah! Yeah!

08:47Oh, why didn't I become a butcher, a baker, or a candlestick maker like my mother wanted?

08:55What was the question, dude?

08:57He doesn't know what he wants to be.

08:59Oh!

09:01Be what you wanna be! Or not! Whatever!

09:07To be or not to be.

09:10That is the question.

09:12Ooh, I like him a bit!

09:18I'm through!

09:20Dial, dude.

09:31Scare, dude!

09:32How can I scare if I can't see?

09:41To be or not to be.

09:49Whoa!

09:51All right!

09:56Ted, that was one righteous water slide!

09:59Almost as good as the water loop in San Dimas!

10:02Should we go again?

10:04I do not know, dude. I do not see where to get tickets.

10:07Claim jumpers!

10:09We are no such thing!

10:11True! We are Wild Stallions!

10:14Who are you?

10:15I'm a 49er!

10:17Whoa! Joe Montana!

10:20You would be an outstanding career day speaker!

10:23Not Montana! San Francisco!

10:26And I'm Captain John Suttering!

10:28And this is my mind!

10:30I am a prospector!

10:32It does not appear from your appearance that your prospects are very good, dude.

10:36Oh, true enough.

10:38I've been poking around this here hill for now and who knows how long.

10:42And all I've ever discovered is dirt.

10:45Uh, you fellas want to give it a go?

10:47No, thank you, grizzled old prospector, dude.

10:50We have our own mining to do.

10:52My friend Ted speaks the truth.

10:54We must find someone to speak a career day or we will be most heinously expelled from school.

10:58You boys don't quite get my drift.

11:01You're gonna have to make restitution for all the damage you caused to my food.

11:08Besides, prospecting is a fine career.

11:12Nothing but opportunity.

11:15And I guarantee you one thing.

11:17There's gold in them mar hills.

11:27Nothing like the sound of other people working.

11:30Indeed, yessiree.

11:39What in tarnation?

11:41Great idea, Sutter!

11:43You'll have a fortune in no time!

11:49What the heck?

12:00Whoa, you were right, grizzled prospector, dude.

12:03There really is gold in them mar hills.

12:06Oh, what are you boys talking about?

12:09Three rides for a pouch of gold, dude.

12:12Absolutely. It's the most awesome first water slide in history.

12:16I've struck gold!

12:19I'm rich!

12:22Filthy rich!

12:24Mine!

12:26I've got to find a place to hide it.

12:31Ha ha ha!

12:39Uh-oh.

12:44There's a whole lot of shaking going on.

12:46True, Bill. We'd better move.

12:51Style, dude.

12:56Gold!

13:00We are not alone, Ted.

13:02We still need to find a most outstanding speaker for career day.

13:05What about that other most statuesque dude on Mr. Ryan's desk?

13:08Right. Mr. Mark Twain.

13:11Found it! Mark Twain!

13:13See under Samuel Clemens.

13:15What does that mean?

13:17It is most obvious, dude.

13:19Mr. Samuel Clemens must know where Mr. Mark Twain lives.

13:21Of course.

13:24Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.

13:27Ah!

13:40Whoa!

13:42Whoa!

13:52That had to be one of your worst landings, dude.

13:55You try to drive when you're up to your neck in frogs.

14:01Ah!

14:04Ah!

14:11Ah!

14:16Just pretend you don't see any frogs, Ted.

14:18What frogs?

14:20Mark Twain!

14:22Bill, did you hear that?

14:24Yeah. A most excellent turn of events.

14:27Mark Twain!

14:30Mr. Mark Twain?

14:32Uh, excuse me?

14:34Are you the most famous Mr. Mark Twain?

14:36No, Mark Twain is a measurement.

14:38It means two fathoms.

14:42Like fathom of the opera?

14:44No, like 12 feet.

14:46Now, let me work before I get fired.

14:50Mark Twain!

14:54Where?

14:57Perhaps we should try to find Mr. Samuel Clemens.

15:00He'll know where to find Mr. Mark Twain.

15:02But I'm Samuel Clemens.

15:04Excellent. Then you must know where...

15:09Where did they come from?

15:12It is a most long and odious story.

15:15A story, eh?

15:17Clemens, what are these frogs doing on my riverboat?

15:21They're just leaving, Mr. Bixby.

15:23We'll see that they do, if you want to remain captain of this boat.

15:34Now get them into the dining room.

15:36This is more difficult than that most loathsome frog video game.

15:45Clemens, you're fired!

15:47Oh, and another career bites the dust.

15:50Oh, and another career bites the dust.

15:53Do not worry, Mr. Captain Clemens, sir.

15:55We will help you out.

15:57Oh, you've already done too much.

16:04Ted, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

16:07Most assuredly, dude.

16:09Let us get hopping.

16:21I love you.

16:32Well, we did it.

16:34What's the difference? I've lost another job.

16:37Another job?

16:39Yep. Let's see, I was a printer, a confederate soldier, a miner,

16:44and now I can add Mississippi Riverboat Captain to the was list.

16:48But you got rid of the frogs.

16:50Will that not get you your job back?

16:52We didn't exactly get rid of them.

16:54Perhaps you could tell the passengers you've installed shiny green astroturf.

16:59Or maybe everyone will want frog's legs for dinner.

17:05Not even if it's the only thing on the menu.

17:11Whoa, I've just had a flash of brainitude.

17:14What is it? I'll try anything.

17:16Oh, I like the fat one.

17:18I like the one with long eyelashes.

17:20No, my money's on the green one.

17:21Well, they're all green.

17:22Oh.

17:25All right, boy. Do it for me, dude.

17:28On your mark, get set, go.

17:32And they're off.

17:34Luffy's in the lead, followed by Hoppy, Lillipad, and Ward bringing up the rear.

17:38Come on, boy.

17:40Go, Luffy, go.

17:45Bummer, dude.

17:46Ward is my favorite. Brainwave.

17:49I know just how to correct this most egregious situation.

17:55It's Slumpy, Lillipad, Hoppy, and Ward.

17:58There's now four links behind.

18:10And here comes Ward.

18:12Come on, Ward.

18:16Ward is through the pack and in the lead.

18:24And now it's no one in the lead and every man for himself.

18:28Come on.

18:40Shoot.

18:41Ted, my friend, that was most victorious.

18:44Not.

18:48Sorry, Mr. Riverboat Pilot, dude.

18:50We inadvertently let our enthusiasm get the better of us.

18:54That's X, Mr. Riverboat Pilot, dude.

18:57Clemens, you're fired.

18:59You can't fire me. I'm already fired.

19:02Good.

19:07Uh, Mr. Ex-Captain Pilot Clemens, sir,

19:09we were wondering if you could be a speaker at the San Dimas High School Career Day.

19:13Yes, we couldn't find Mr. Mark Twain.

19:15But you would be an excellent second choice.

19:19Plus, we guarantee that you, even as an ex-pilot of a riverboat,

19:23would be most triumphant.

19:25Sorry, boys, but I've got a new career.

19:28I'm gonna be a writer.

19:29And in a way, you know, it's all you're doing.

19:33See, my first story is the celebrated jumping frog of Calaveras County.

19:40By Samuel Clemens.

19:42Yeah, it's kind of flat.

19:44I need something that sings.

19:46Something with flesh.

19:48Something like wild stallions.

19:51Oh, that's a good name.

19:53Wild stallions.

19:55Yeah, it's a good name. It's ours.

19:58True. You will need your own name if you are to make your mark.

20:02And I have just the name for you, Two Fathoms.

20:05Mark Twain.

20:08Hmm, not bad. I'll consider it.

20:12Glad we could help you.

20:14Too bad we could find no one to help us.

20:16Yes, Teb, my friend.

20:18It is time to return to San Dimas and face some most non-triumphant music.

20:24Mark Twain!

20:36I am major bummed, dude.

20:38We busted our buns and have not had a show for it.

20:41Truly.

20:42There's never anyone around when you need them.

20:47Whoa! Check it out, Ted!

20:51Dude, that is it!

20:53If ever anybody needed someone, we are them.

20:59What you do not understand, we have got to see His Honor the Mayor.

21:02Yeah, tell him two future voters are in dire need of his most esteemed assistance.

21:08I'm sorry, His Honor the Mayor is not in today.

21:12What's wrong, Wanda?

21:14Frogs!

21:16Mr. Mayor, dude!

21:18Are we glad to see you.

21:20I want to thank you all for the wonderful guest you arranged.

21:24I think this career day has been a great success.

21:28Unfortunately, Bill and Ted haven't arrived.

21:32I'm afraid I have to say goodbye to you.

21:36Unfortunately, Bill and Ted haven't arrived.

21:41So I guess you all dismissed early.

21:44Sure, Bill.

21:52Hold everything!

21:54Bill, Ted, what's going on?

21:56We have arrived with our most tantalizing guest speaker for career day.

22:07Please, throw your hands together and give a big San Dimas high welcome to His Honor the Mayor.

22:26Well, you guys really squeaked by this time.

22:32Way to go, dude.

22:34Way to go, dude.

22:36Most triumphant!

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