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FunTranscript
00:00It's, it's, it's no good, it's, it's, it's no good, it's, it's no good, it's, it's no good, it's, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's
00:30no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no good, it's no
01:00good,
01:18This city is like extinct. Not even a cat can be seen.
01:21I don't understand, sir.
01:23Does that mean you want a cat?
01:25A cat? You must have gone mad!
01:27No! I don't want a cat! Everything I want is an idea!
01:31You don't need to say anything more. I can imagine what you mean.
01:36Oh, all of a sudden?
01:37Yes. Am I that stupid, sir?
01:39You don't have to say it.
01:44If you weren't always so loud, I wouldn't be good.
01:49For years now, your thoughts have only been about that.
02:11Get out of here!
02:19Thank you for your help, nice stranger.
02:22You broke your evil spell by defending me against this keter.
02:26It starts well again.
02:27The guy is making up a story that is horrifying.
02:30Oh, could you please let me down, nice stranger?
02:34You see, I'm not a real cat at all.
02:37What are you saying?
02:39Yes, I'm a magician.
02:41A malicious rival was jealous of my art and turned me into a cat.
02:45A malicious rival was jealous of my art and turned me into a cat.
02:49But if you're a magician, why couldn't you defend yourself against the others?
02:53And the dog over there, do you think it's a real dog?
02:56At some point, everyone gets what they deserve.
02:59I would like to reward you for your merciful actions.
03:03This magic pen gives the magician Zeich a trick.
03:06What's so magical about this pen?
03:09If you draw a portrait of someone with this pen,
03:12and then tear up the portrait,
03:14your model will immediately disappear to a faraway and very unknown island.
03:21And now I'm going to have a little chat to celebrate my rescue.
03:25Hey, don't you dare! Did you hear what he said about this pen?
03:28Uh-oh, here we go again.
03:31Come on, give me a sheet of paper! Hurry up!
03:34Glory and honor to the great, here is no good!
03:36Give me paper, quick, paper!
03:38Oh, come on, I know there's going to be a disaster, as always.
03:48Look, I've finished the portrait of the Caliph.
03:51Now it's going to be torn up, and then...
03:53There's going to be a big problem.
03:55No! The Caliph will disappear to this faraway and unknown island.
03:59And then I'll be Caliph instead of the Caliph.
04:03Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm.
04:06Hmm, what do you think? Tell me!
04:08Uh, doesn't he look very similar to Gebeta?
04:13Great! So my work is incomprehensible.
04:16That means perfect, brilliant!
04:18Ha ha ha ha, done!
04:20And now I'm Caliph instead of the Caliph!
04:23Sir, look at this!
04:25What do you want? I have to raise the taxes right away.
04:28You can't postpone something like this for long.
04:30The Caliph!
04:31The magician smeared me!
04:33His pen is a rhino, a swindler!
04:35Should I make a good face for the evil pen?
04:38No, Gebeta, only the similarity was absolutely unsatisfactory.
04:41Yes, that's right, what you say.
04:42I have to see the model alive in front of me.
04:44Come on, do me a favor, come on!
04:50There!
05:00Ouch!
05:01What is it?
05:03Lord of the Believers of the Orient.
05:06Yes, my good Isnogo.
05:09I ask you to sit down for me as a model.
05:11You want to draw me?
05:13I had no idea you had artistic talent.
05:18Don't move!
05:21You should stick more to the model, Gebeta.
05:24You are an art banouse.
05:26I'm sure it's good.
05:27Oh, may I see? May I see?
05:29No, and now I will tear it apart.
05:32Oh, how regrettable.
05:34I would have loved to see it.
05:36It wasn't particularly good.
05:37I'll try again.
05:38Don't move!
05:39I am so happy that you will never be satisfied with the second place.
05:43I am so happy that you will never be satisfied with the second place.
05:46I am so happy that you will never be satisfied with the second place.
05:49I am so happy that you will never be satisfied with the second place.
05:54And this?
05:56To be honest, not much better.
05:58And I say it's good!
06:01No, it's not. It's still there.
06:20Your efforts tear my heart apart, my good Isnogut.
06:27No, please, you can't go away.
06:29One more time, yes?
06:31It's very late, my good Isnogut.
06:33Watching you at work has exhausted me.
06:36I have to go to sleep.
06:38I failed again.
06:40Sir, give up. It's no use.
06:42You just don't have talent for it.
06:44Never. I never give up.
06:46Do you understand me? Never!
06:49Then I will learn to draw.
06:51Come on, follow me.
06:54I warn you, I will keep your cheeky comments to myself.
06:57Never say that again. It doesn't look like him at all.
06:59Or you don't have talent, sir. Is that clear?
07:01You know, sir, well, yes.
07:03Shut up. When do you understand that?
07:05Come in.
07:07Fascha Farb, I heard you're supposed to be the best artist in the whole Caliphate.
07:11And the absolute only one. Teach me how to draw.
07:14Are you also aware that it is a very difficult craft?
07:17Especially for a beginner.
07:19The requirements of today's youth are very high standards.
07:22Shut up! If you don't teach me how to draw, I'll have you fired!
07:26All right, all right.
07:28All my customers have the same arguments.
07:30But I'll tell you one thing.
07:32In this profession, many professions are chosen, but only a few are chosen.
07:38Let's start with an apple.
07:40Here you are.
07:41I'm interested in portraying.
07:43First, the apple.
07:44I'll leave you alone now. I still have to finish an assignment.
07:57That was nothing.
08:00No, no, no. Still not good.
08:03I'm the teacher here, not you.
08:05I decide whether something has turned out well or not.
08:09Just don't give up.
08:11I'll quickly finish the illustrations of the almanac of last year.
08:16And what do you say to that?
08:18Uh, you know, uh ...
08:20All right, I understand. Then I'll try again.
08:38My whole paper is on it, and I haven't seen a single drawing of you yet.
08:44I think I've got it now.
08:50Did you see? It works! It works!
08:53Why did you break the drawing because it was good?
08:56Because I hate yellow apples!
08:58And now I want to draw a portrait.
09:00It's true. The Lord doesn't give up.
09:02We need a model.
09:08That would be perfect, wouldn't it? Or do you disagree?
09:11Oh, no, no, sir. Not me!
09:13How should I portray you? Before or after the almanac?
09:20Don't move!
09:39Oh, no!
09:55That's not going to work.
09:57No, no, please! Don't help him!
09:59You're sensitive!
10:01Don't move and don't make a fuss!
10:03I think you did it!
10:05You did it!
10:10Congratulations! The resemblance is perfect.
10:13A perfect resemblance, really?
10:25It works! It works!
10:27You were right to tear up the drawing,
10:29because you don't have any advanced technology.
10:32Get lost!
10:36This guy is crazy. Where did his servant disappear to?
10:44Don't move, Lord of the Faithful.
10:47I admire your endurance, my good Isenogood, but I hope I won't be as exhausted as I was the first time.
10:55I must say, the resemblance is amazing.
10:58You haven't seen it yet, but I think you're right. This time it's masterly.
11:04Hmm?
11:23Oh, my good Isenogood, look at that!
11:25You think I'm a god, but don't worry, you'll always be my faithful high priest.
11:30He hits the nail on the head.
11:35To Be Continued
11:51Is that a question, or an order?
11:54Get going! You should hurry, you lazybones!
11:57Throw out the ropes!
12:04Caliphate, do you have anything to report?
12:07No, nothing at all.
12:09And what about the present? You have the present for the Grand Vizier, don't you?
12:13You're not allowed to attack if the Grand Vizier doesn't have a present for you.
12:18I have a present. Here it is, Zölder.
12:21Very nice. Welcome to the Caliphate.
12:24Get out of the way!
12:30I have to give the Grand Vizier a present. What's next?
12:33I grabbed the first thing that came into my hands in the storage room.
12:37I have to come up with a story.
12:40Let's see, I'm sure I can think of something.
12:44Ah, be so good, Seafarer, you're in Baghdad again.
12:48What will you bring me today from the remote, mysterious West?
12:52I suppose your present is poisoned, right?
12:55Yes, really, I'm impressed by you.
12:59I'm actually bringing a mysterious poison.
13:02I love presents. Nothing goes without presents among good friends.
13:06Hey, what's that supposed to be?
13:08A salve, Grand Vizier. A terribly mean poison.
13:11I got it from a pharmacist from the Land of the Settling Sun.
13:14But the packaging is very unusual.
13:17Just look, it says LFD 77.
13:21A very rare substance whose composition no magician has yet been able to find.
13:27Tell me, which body part of the victim should the salve be applied to?
13:31To the teeth.
13:33To the teeth?
13:34Yes, with the help of this brush here.
13:40And you guarantee that the user of this salve will be destroyed?
13:45Yes, yes, completely and totally.
13:49I'm sorry, but I have to leave you now, Grand Vizier.
13:52You know, the flood won't wait.
13:57With this, I will finally be able to make the caliph instead of the caliph.
14:03Poisonous salve. A poisonous salve.
14:07I pulled all my tricks today.
14:11The dimwit really fell for it.
14:14Well, I did what I could.
14:17And since the caliph will be more and more convinced that you brush his teeth,
14:21every side is served.
14:27The caliph will vanish and I will become caliph instead of the caliph.
14:31Uh, sir?
14:32What? What is it now?
14:34How do you want to get the caliph to brush his teeth with this brush?
14:39You're right. I have to come up with some mean trick.
14:44I've got it!
14:46What is it, sir?
14:48We say the stuff is for brushing the teeth.
14:51That's crazy. I would have trusted you with a better idea.
14:57No discussion is good!
14:59Don't shout so loud, sir.
15:01Over the years I've served you, I've been pulling more and more together.
15:05My nerves have become very sensitive.
15:07I'll just tell the caliph that his teeth are dirty and he should brush them.
15:14Oh, my goodness.
15:17I really have to laugh.
15:19No human in the caliphate brushes his teeth.
15:24What an absurd idea.
15:30I have to change my tactics.
15:36What's going on?
15:39Oh, yes, of course.
15:41Today is market day.
15:53These women give me an idea.
15:58Don't do it!
16:00I have an idea!
16:05Oh, my nerves.
16:08Hurry up and send all the market women to my chamber.
16:11Why do you want to do that?
16:13Just do what I say!
16:18And I will teach the caliph.
16:22A ball, my good esenogut?
16:24You want me to organize a party for the market women?
16:27Yes, sir.
16:29A ball to introduce a market price.
16:32These traders are the wealth of your kingdom.
16:35You must show them the honor.
16:37But does it have to be a ball?
16:40Yes, the ball has to be.
16:42The women are introduced to you and you have to dance with them.
16:45But don't you know what a terribly bad dancer I am, esenogut?
16:49Then you will learn to dance.
16:51I'll organize it for you.
16:59Oh, your ball decoration is overwhelmingly generous.
17:03Not to mention wasteful, esenogut.
17:06Thank you very much, sir.
17:08Here come the lovely market women.
17:19You have to invite them to dance, sir.
17:23I really have to?
17:25Yes, you have to.
17:27And success is guaranteed.
17:29Good, if you insist, esenogut.
17:33Would you like to dance?
17:35With pleasure, sir.
17:37It's an honor for me.
17:39Yes.
18:01Oh, I'm terribly sorry.
18:03I suddenly became so tired.
18:05Oh, as you wish.
18:10And what about you?
18:12Would you like to dance?
18:14No, better not.
18:16Thank you very much.
18:18I'm already forgiven, sir.
18:20And what about you?
18:22Would you like to dance?
18:24No, I'm terribly sorry.
18:26I have my migraine again today.
18:29Ah!
18:37Esenogut!
18:39I don't understand what's going on here.
18:41None of the women wanted to dance with me.
18:43They all turned their faces away.
18:48May I speak to you like a friend, sir?
18:50Of course.
18:52Yes, my good esenogut.
18:54Have you been to the dentist lately?
18:56To tell you the truth, no.
18:58No, really? Then wait here.
19:04So you're the dentist?
19:06You could say that.
19:08So it's up to you.
19:10You want me to lie to the caliph?
19:12That's your specialty, isn't it?
19:14Or am I wrong?
19:16That's true, sir.
19:18But lying to the caliph can be quite expensive.
19:20All right, all right, come with me.
19:22One hand washes the other.
19:24And here's a toothpick.
19:30And let go.
19:38All right.
19:44Are you aware that 96% of all mouth odor
19:48is caused by poor dental care?
19:50And you should know that...
19:52You have dirty teeth.
19:54Oh, really?
19:56You have to keep your mouth open.
19:58Don't move.
20:00I'll be right back with your gear.
20:02And you, close your mouth.
20:08It works, it works.
20:10Come on, let's get the salve.
20:18I think I really need to go on vacation.
20:20But not before I've become a caliph.
20:22Here, take this.
20:24Press the salve on the teeth.
20:26It's not working.
20:28I have to open the cap first.
20:30By Allah!
20:32Hurry up, open it.
20:36What is it?
20:38Nothing's coming out.
20:40Nothing's coming out.
20:42I can tell.
20:44The salve is too thick.
20:46Suck it out.
20:48How do I do that?
20:50There's the Super LFD 77 in there.
20:52Suck it out, that's an order.
20:54No, no, no, no, I'm not doing that.
20:56I know a lot of ways and means
20:58to change your mind.
21:00What's the point of theater
21:02if stuff can only get dangerous on your teeth?
21:04You have to suck it out quickly.
21:06Yes, but, but, but...
21:12Hurry up!
21:18No!
21:22I'm sure I'll be dissolved.
21:24This poison will destroy me.
21:26You know,
21:28nothing's happened so far, sir.
21:30Are you sure?
21:32Well, maybe the effect
21:34is delayed somehow.
21:36It's so good!
21:38It's so good!
21:42And now I'm doing my job well.
21:44Am I still not going there?
21:46No, not yet, sir.
21:48It's so good!
21:52What is it?
21:54Am I finally going there?
21:56Tell me the truth.
21:58Am I finally going there?
22:00No, sir, unfortunately not.
22:02Are you sure?
22:04Look closely.
22:06I am.
22:08It's so good!
22:10It's so good!
22:12Am I still not going there?
22:16Good.
22:18Good.
22:22Good is,
22:24is, is no good.
22:26Is, is,
22:28is no good.
22:46Is,
22:48is,
22:50is,
22:52is,
22:54is,
22:56is,
22:58is,
23:00is,
23:02is,
23:04is,
23:06is,
23:08is,
23:10is,
23:12is,
23:14is,
23:16is,
23:18is,
23:20is.