• 4 months ago
Rex, a Florida party girl, turns out to be the only hope for the NASA space program after a fluke puts her in training w | dG1fV2M2czUzOFk0SzQ
Transcript
00:00Nadine, tonight sucked. Tonight sucked, and you want to know why? Because I was hit with a meteor shower of truth.
00:10Ten years ago, I got lost, and I stopped even trying to find my way back.
00:16Oh, Lexi.
00:18But it's not too late.
00:20Um, well...
00:27I'm gonna be an astronaut.
00:30Girl!
00:33I know.
00:35Oh my god. Wait, again?
00:39Astronaut!
00:41Your girl! Hello!
00:44Ooh, ooh, yeah, yeah, okay. Yeah, boy.
00:46Yeah! If that's what you want, yeah!
00:53Okay, here we go.
00:55Applicants for the NASA astronaut training program.
00:58Cool, cool, cool.
01:00Oh.
01:01Must meet the following requirements before submitting an application.
01:04Got it. Passion number one.
01:06Easy.
01:08Doesn't say that.
01:10What?
01:11But higher degree in mathematics, engineering, biological science, physical science, or computer science.
01:19Oh.
01:20Three years of professional experience in a related field.
01:23Ouch.
01:24Or!
01:25Or?
01:26At least a thousand hours piloting a jet aircraft.
01:29Okay.
01:31And.
01:32And, and, and?
01:33Must be able to pass the long-duration astronaut physical test.
01:36Yes, yes, girl!
01:38Think about it, you got them glutes, you got them quads.
01:42That's you.
01:43But it's not just that part, it's all the parts.
01:48It's not one out of three, it's all three.
01:53I frickin' knew we never landed on the moon.
01:58Don't start.
02:06You know, I, I do love you in a jumpsuit, but there are other jobs with jumpsuits.
02:23I see you, crescent moon.
02:26I see you, girl.
02:32I used to be zigzaggy and out of the box, and that got me places.
02:37And now, it's gonna get me to space.
02:42Dear Sir or Madam of NASA.
02:53What you are about to read is a dream.
02:58A dream of the life I wish I'd led.
03:02In this dream, instead of bedazzling my clothes, I dazzled my professors.
03:07And instead of pouring drinks, I poured myself into the scientific method.
03:13I nurtured my passions, they nurtured me back.
03:18I made good decisions.
03:22Because I valued myself.
03:25Surely I can't be the only capable applicant who got kicked in the ass by life,
03:29and doesn't have picture-perfect qualifications.
03:32The past is done.
03:34What I hope is that we can build a future together, in space.
03:38Where the trippy mystery of our existence pulsates with glittering light.
03:43Respectfully, Tiffany Rex Simpson.

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