I Want To Eat Your Pancreas : English Japanese
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00The day my classmate Sakura Yamauchi's funeral was held, the rain caused the sky to look gloomy.
00:00:22It didn't reflect her personality at all.
00:00:29As proof of the life she lived, the wake and funeral were drowned in the tears of all
00:00:34the people who came to mourn her.
00:00:36Or, that's what I assume anyway, because I didn't go.
00:00:43I stayed at home.
00:00:59This was the last text message I ever sent her.
00:01:08Just a single sentence.
00:01:18Did she even see it?
00:01:19Guess I'll never know.
00:01:30Sorry, I had to stay after class.
00:01:34There's no running in the library, got it?
00:01:37Oops, I forgot.
00:01:43What are you doing?
00:01:45I'm putting all these books on the shelf.
00:01:48But those are historical fiction.
00:01:50The shelves for history books.
00:01:54I mean, aren't they pretty much the same?
00:01:58If you tell me what I'm supposed to do, I'll get it done, I promise.
00:02:02Memorize the classification numbers.
00:02:05Aw, come on, you gotta be kidding me.
00:02:17Oh, hey, I just remembered.
00:02:19I saw the coolest thing on TV yesterday.
00:02:22You're being really loud.
00:02:24They're saying that in the past, if you had any liver problems, then you'd eat liver.
00:02:28And if you had stomach problems, then you would eat stomach.
00:02:31Doing so is supposed to cure the part of your body that ailed you.
00:02:36But I doubt I could convince anyone to let me eat theirs.
00:02:39So basically, you're considering cannibalism.
00:02:44Come to think of it, you're probably the only person I could ask.
00:02:50Ask what?
00:02:52Well, you know.
00:03:00Hang on.
00:03:09I wanna eat your pancreas!
00:04:09I wanna eat your pancreas!
00:04:29I wanna eat your pancreas!
00:04:50It was sometime in April.
00:04:52The last of the cherry blossoms were still blooming on the trees.
00:04:57I had been absent from school that day, so I could get stitches removed after an appendectomy.
00:05:05Come on, this way!
00:05:08You made it right on time. Your aunt just had her baby.
00:05:11She did? I wanna go see!
00:05:17Well, that's something we should maybe run by your aunt first.
00:05:19Oh, no fair! I wanted to pick out the name!
00:05:46A diary?
00:05:51Dying from pancreatic disease?
00:05:55Hey, that belongs to me.
00:06:04Did I surprise you? I didn't expect someone to be reading it right in the middle of the lobby.
00:06:09When I realized it was gone, I raced back here as fast as I could.
00:06:12That's when I saw it sitting in your hands!
00:06:14Yeah, I picked it up off the floor.
00:06:21Here.
00:06:29You did read it, right?
00:06:33I titled it Living with Dying.
00:06:36When I found out I had pancreatic disease, I started keeping it as a diary.
00:06:42You don't think this is some kind of joke, do you? I would never lie about something so serious.
00:06:54My pancreas doesn't work now, and I'm running out of time.
00:06:58Pretty soon, I...
00:07:03I'll be dead.
00:07:09That's too bad.
00:07:12Seriously? Is that all you have to say? Were you listening?
00:07:16Because, like, most people usually say, the cute ones die young, or something sort of comforting at least.
00:07:22I mean, come on! You've got to have something.
00:07:29Sorry.
00:07:37Are you for real? I don't mean to laugh!
00:07:42Well, I should get going.
00:07:59Whoa, what a coincidence!
00:08:02I'm sorry, but I don't have time for your coincidences.
00:08:16Hey, we're in the same class, but that's the first time we've talked, right? I always see you reading by yourself.
00:08:23Why were you at the hospital today? You sick? I hear something's been going around lately.
00:08:30I'm going to be late for the train. Goodbye.
00:08:36Hang on! I wasn't done yet! I've got one last thing I need to say.
00:08:41You have to promise you won't tell another living soul about my illness. I haven't told anyone but you.
00:08:47So that makes it our little secret.
00:08:51Yeah, I promise. It's not like I have anyone to tell anyway.
00:08:55You don't have any friends? Want me to spend the remainder of my short life being friends with you so we can share secrets?
00:09:01I'd prefer if you didn't. You should spend that time doing whatever you want to do.
00:09:06You got it!
00:09:12Thanks for listening!
00:09:16I thought I'd never talk to her again.
00:09:19But the following week, for some reason, she filled an open position at the library.
00:09:27These books are heavy. Do we really have to do this every day?
00:09:31Pretty much.
00:09:33Huh?
00:09:34It's part of the responsibilities of this job. What, expecting something more exciting?
00:09:39No, I guess not.
00:09:42Do you even like to read?
00:09:44Not really.
00:09:46Although I do read lots of manga!
00:09:49Honestly, with the little time you have left, are you sure you want to spend it here?
00:09:55I'm obviously fine with it.
00:09:57It's not that obvious.
00:09:59Then what do you suggest I do instead of this, huh?
00:10:03You could go out and reunite with your first crush, or maybe go hitchhiking in foreign countries and decide where you want to die.
00:10:11It's not like I don't understand what you're saying, but let me ask you a question.
00:10:16Do you have things you want to do before you die?
00:10:21I've got a few things in mind.
00:10:23And with that said, you're not doing them now.
00:10:25You could possibly die from a freak accident tomorrow, for all you know.
00:10:29So the way that I'm going through life right now is really no different than the way you are.
00:10:35Each day is worth just as much as the one before it.
00:10:38That's why the value of today doesn't change based on how I spent my time.
00:10:42To be honest, doing normal stuff like this is almost as fun as doing anything else!
00:10:49If you say so.
00:10:51Oh right, I forgot to mention.
00:10:53Remember this? It's also where I keep a list of things I want to do before I die.
00:10:58And you're the lucky one who gets to do them with me!
00:11:01Where did this come from all of a sudden?
00:11:04You're contradicting what you said earlier.
00:11:06Hey, do you have any plans after this?
00:11:08I'd imagine being friendless gives you plenty of free time.
00:11:11Whatever it is you're plotting, I'll pass.
00:11:14Oh yeah?
00:11:16But I could have sworn that you were the same person who told me to do whatever I wanted to.
00:11:20You know this isn't what I meant by that.
00:11:23There's a place I want to go and I want you to go there with me!
00:11:28So good!
00:11:30Why didn't you just come here with your family?
00:11:32Come on, don't say that.
00:11:34Here, have some organ meats. They're so yummy!
00:11:36What are you...
00:11:41You know what that is? It's pancreas.
00:11:47So I'm curious. This whole eating organs thing, is it some sort of treatment?
00:11:53I just think they're really tasty.
00:11:55When somebody asks me what I like, I usually say, organ meats.
00:11:58They're my absolute favorite.
00:12:00Hey mister, more stomach and heart meats please!
00:12:04Are there restrictions on what you can eat?
00:12:06None that I know of anyway.
00:12:08But I guess the reason I can eat most things is because treatments have improved a lot over the last decade.
00:12:13Humans can be pretty amazing sometimes, don't you think?
00:12:17I've got pancreatic disease, but it hasn't affected my lifestyle at all.
00:12:21Here's the extra meat you ordered.
00:12:25Hmm, I don't like the idea of cremation.
00:12:29Huh, that's an interesting topic to bring up right now.
00:12:32Because if I got cremated, how would you eat my pancreas?
00:12:35Excuse me?
00:12:38You remember that show I told you about?
00:12:40Well, I did a little more research and learned there are people in foreign countries who believe that if you have someone eat you, your soul lives on inside of them.
00:12:48Find somebody else. Your soul's probably really obnoxious.
00:12:52Yeah, you're right!
00:12:54By the way, do you really not get along with anybody in our class?
00:12:59Because I don't think any of them know a single thing about you, myself included.
00:13:04According to everybody else, I'm just the boring one.
00:13:07Assuming they don't think something worse.
00:13:10Have people from class actually told you that?
00:13:13Not personally, but I bet it's true.
00:13:16You don't have any proof to support that.
00:13:18It sounds like you just made it up.
00:13:20Why don't they really think that about you?
00:13:23It doesn't matter if it's how they actually feel or not.
00:13:26All that matters is what I think.
00:13:28My hobby is imagining how the people around me view me as a person.
00:13:32I don't tend to ask them to confirm.
00:13:36So, if that's the case, I want to know how you imagine I see you.
00:13:41As boring, the same as everyone else.
00:13:44Or maybe, as the classmate who knows your secret.
00:13:51Maybe you're right, maybe not.
00:13:54Who cares? I told you, it doesn't matter to me what the truth is.
00:13:58Okay, but how did you even pick up such a weird hobby?
00:14:03Enough is as good as a feast.
00:14:05Huh? What's that supposed to mean?
00:14:09Don't have more than you need.
00:14:11I keep all my non-family relationships confined to my imagination.
00:14:16And there, I decide whether someone likes me or not.
00:14:19As long as they're not going to cause me any sort of harm,
00:14:22what they think of me isn't that important.
00:14:26That's why I don't care about other people.
00:14:30And nobody else cares about me.
00:14:33So are you saying I'm nobody?
00:14:36I wouldn't invite someone I didn't care about to come eat with me.
00:14:40Don't insult me like that.
00:14:42Huh?
00:14:48Even though I do think you're a bit of an idiot sometimes,
00:14:51I wasn't insulting you.
00:14:53You probably didn't mean to sound so rude about it.
00:14:56But I'm still upset you felt the need to say it!
00:14:58I can't eat all of that meat.
00:15:04Wow, the weather's perfect.
00:15:06Come to think of it, dying on a day like this wouldn't be so bad.
00:15:11You're not still upset with me, are you?
00:15:13Hard to say.
00:15:17Hey!
00:15:21Ah, jeez. Look at this mess.
00:15:24Hey, Grandma.
00:15:25It's your fault that my nice pair of pants got all stained like this.
00:15:28I'd like to get them cleaned, but I'm going to need some money first.
00:15:31Excuse me, but you're the ones who ran into her with your bikes.
00:15:34Look, if she didn't want to get hit,
00:15:36maybe she shouldn't have been standing in the middle of the damn road!
00:15:39Since you opened your big mouth, do you offer you to pay for it?
00:15:42What's going on?
00:15:43No clue.
00:15:44You can hear me, can't you?
00:15:46So say something already!
00:15:48Let's go this way.
00:15:53Listen, all right?
00:15:55You'd better pay up or else!
00:15:57You're the one at fault here!
00:15:59You're not hurt, are you, man?
00:16:01You can't harass people for something that was clearly your fault, you jerk!
00:16:04The hell's your problem?
00:16:06You're not even allowed to be riding bikes in the shopping area!
00:16:09You'd know if you read the sign!
00:16:11Apologize right now!
00:16:13Mind your own business!
00:16:15You're trying to get yourself hurt!
00:16:17You're seriously threatening me with violence in front of all these people?
00:16:21If this goes to court, then you two are going to lose for sure!
00:16:24You there!
00:16:26Stay where you are!
00:16:30And this is for picking on a little old lady!
00:16:37Hey, you little brat!
00:16:39With that strong a kick, he probably lost both of them.
00:16:47That was awesome!
00:16:48You're so brave!
00:16:49Nice work, Emily!
00:16:55Hey, big man!
00:16:56Hey, get back here!
00:16:58Where do you think you're going, miss?
00:17:01Let's go!
00:17:06Let's go!
00:17:12Why do that?
00:17:14It wasn't your problem.
00:17:17Man, I was so terrified!
00:17:20It's easier to take risks when you know you're going to die.
00:17:23I've never heard anyone say that and really mean it.
00:17:27Until now.
00:17:32Oh, how cute!
00:17:33Check out the name of this cafe!
00:17:35I think it was made for me.
00:17:37Well, let's go inside.
00:17:39Spring and cherry blossoms go hand in hand.
00:17:42Is this because your name means cherry blossoms?
00:17:44Yeah, but I'm also pretty thirsty.
00:17:46Come on!
00:18:01Wow, this is a nice place, isn't it?
00:18:05Hey!
00:18:07Do you know why cherry blossoms tend to bloom in spring?
00:18:13After its flowers are gone,
00:18:15the cherry tree begins to sprout new buds three months later.
00:18:19They wait for the temperature to get warm
00:18:22and bloom into beautiful new flowers.
00:18:25Cherry blossoms always wait for the right time to bloom.
00:18:30Isn't that wonderful?
00:18:36Oh, I've got to make sure that Kyoko knows about this cafe, too.
00:18:40Here's an idea.
00:18:42We should all come here together next time.
00:18:44Give me your number so we can start planning that out.
00:18:46No, thank you.
00:18:48Would you just give me your phone already?
00:18:50We only have a short time left before I die, you know.
00:18:53So we need to make sure we talk as much as possible.
00:18:59Unfortunately, the woman died...
00:19:01I'm back.
00:19:03I'm back.
00:19:05Welcome home. You hungry?
00:19:07I'm good.
00:19:15It's me!
00:19:17Thanks a lot for hanging out with me today.
00:19:19It was so much fun!
00:19:21Be my friend until I die, okay?
00:19:23Later!
00:19:34Hey, good morning, everyone!
00:19:36Sakura! What's the deal with you and that guy?
00:19:46So, uh, you friends with Sakura now?
00:19:49Guess some people spotted the two of you hanging out yesterday.
00:19:52It's nothing.
00:19:54We just ran into each other.
00:19:56Hmm, is that so?
00:19:58Is that so?
00:20:03Want some gum?
00:20:05I think I'll pass, but thanks.
00:20:07Sure.
00:20:09Well, keep me in the loop if anything interesting happens.
00:20:12Uh, I can totally hook you up with a better guy, you know.
00:20:15You should really take her up on that offer,
00:20:17because you're way too good for someone like him.
00:20:19Hey, it's not like that. We're only friends.
00:20:22Doesn't seem that way.
00:20:24Morning.
00:20:27Hey.
00:20:28Hey, guys.
00:20:30Sakura, that band you mentioned.
00:20:32I found their CD at a shop near the station.
00:20:35This thing's out of print, so it's super rare!
00:20:38You can go ahead and borrow it if you want.
00:20:40Wow, thanks!
00:20:41Sure.
00:20:44Morning, guys.
00:20:46Can I please copy your homework?
00:20:48You forgot to do it again?
00:20:49If you want to date someone, then what about Takahiro?
00:20:51He's handsome, smart, athletic, and the class rep.
00:20:54What more could you want?
00:20:56Look, I appreciate your concern, but it's not like that.
00:20:59I'm just saying, you've got tons of options, so take advantage of them.
00:21:02She's totally right.
00:21:03What's that supposed to mean?
00:21:05You guys are so weird sometimes.
00:21:07We're trying to look out for you.
00:21:14Hey, I decided on the next place that I want to go before I die.
00:21:18Great. Feel free to go without me this time.
00:21:21I don't want the whole class making fun of me again.
00:21:24Oh yeah, that just reminded me.
00:21:26Whenever people asked about the two of us, you told them we weren't really friends, didn't you?
00:21:31Yeah, and?
00:21:32Did you forget my text?
00:21:34We're friends till death do us part!
00:21:36As long as I'm left alone, people can observe all they want.
00:21:39But if they get personal, well, that's the point where I start drawing the line.
00:21:45I was also making sure they didn't learn about your illness.
00:21:48So instead of getting mad, perhaps you should be thanking me.
00:21:53Between this and our taste in meat, you and I are entirely different people, aren't we?
00:21:57I'd say so. We're like complete opposites.
00:22:04Yep, true. We totally are.
00:22:08This is a library. You need to keep your voice down.
00:22:13Getting back on topic, you are going to come, right?
00:22:16Where?
00:22:19Paradise, of course!
00:22:23If you can't decide, I highly recommend the shortcake.
00:22:26This is the kind of place you should take your girlfriends to, not me.
00:22:34Seriously, are you trying to put on weight?
00:22:37Or trying to get me to gain it or something?
00:22:39You keep going to all-you-can-eat places.
00:22:41I'm not trying to do either.
00:22:43I just want to eat all the things I feel like eating.
00:22:48Hey, so are you interested in girls at all?
00:22:51What kind of a question is that?
00:22:53You haven't even glanced at any of the cute girls that have walked by us.
00:22:56Have you ever had a girlfriend before?
00:22:59Of course I haven't. I've never even had a regular friend.
00:23:03Are you for real? Have you wanted either of those things at any point?
00:23:09Hard to say.
00:23:10I guess having a friend to hang out with from time to time might have been interesting.
00:23:14But to be perfectly honest, I think books are much more fun than anything that happens in the real world.
00:23:20So that's why you always have your nose in a book.
00:23:24Just so you know.
00:23:27I broke up with my boyfriend recently.
00:23:30Because you're going to die soon?
00:23:32Of course not. There's no way I'd traumatize him by telling him that.
00:23:36Oh, you probably know who he is, since he's someone in our class and all.
00:23:40No, even if I told you, you might not know his name.
00:23:45As a friend, he was totally great. I could talk to him about almost anything.
00:23:49But things changed once we started dating. He ended up being pushy, in a lot of ways.
00:23:55Uh, Kyoko?
00:23:57What's up?
00:23:58See that?
00:24:05Sakura!
00:24:07Oh! I didn't know that you were here too.
00:24:10So, I'd like you to meet my best friend, Kyoko.
00:24:15Hmm.
00:24:17Sakura, are you really friends with this guy?
00:24:20Yeah, I told you that this morning.
00:24:26Hear me out, Sakura. And don't take this as me complaining or being jealous.
00:24:30But you know, you've been alone with him for two days in a row.
00:24:35You sure you're not dating?
00:24:36Yes, I'm sure.
00:24:37Then what's the deal, huh?
00:24:39Like I said, the two of us are just close.
00:24:42Huh? I still don't know what you mean by that.
00:24:45Kyoko! We're leaving!
00:24:49Shouldn't you be going with them?
00:24:53You are gonna tell me everything tomorrow, got it?
00:24:56Mm-hmm.
00:25:00Wow, I didn't think Kyoko would be here today too.
00:25:03The two of us have been best friends since our middle school days.
00:25:07As you saw, Kyoko can be pretty strong-willed.
00:25:10So when I first met her, I honestly thought she was kinda intimidating.
00:25:13But once we started talking, we really hit it off.
00:25:16She's a good person, so you should be friends with her too.
00:25:27You're not even going to bother telling your best friend that you're sick?
00:25:30It's better that way.
00:25:32She's more sentimental than she looks.
00:25:34So if I told her, she'd just cry every time she saw me.
00:25:37Things wouldn't be as fun anymore, you know?
00:26:08Are you...
00:26:16Are you actually going to die?
00:26:22Sure am.
00:26:30In case you didn't know, I only talk to you about this stuff.
00:26:35That's because you're different than everyone else.
00:26:39With you, I get to have someone who gives me the truth and a normal teenage life.
00:26:47The doctors only ever give me the truth of the situation, because it's their job to.
00:26:53Mom and Dad, after we found out, they began overreacting to everything I say.
00:26:59They're desperately trying to pretend we have a normal life.
00:27:05I'm pretty sure that if Kyoko and the others knew, they would start acting distant in the same way.
00:27:13You're the one person in the whole world who knows the truth about my condition and still lets me have a normal life.
00:27:22So basically, that's why I like hanging out with you. It's really fun.
00:27:35I can't wait for summer to come. I definitely have to make the best of it this year. It could be my last.
00:27:41Oh, thanks a lot. There are so many things to do, like swimming, watching fireworks, and going to all the festivals.
00:27:48Ooh, and how could I forget having a romantic summer fling?
00:27:52A single summer's love, a single summer's mistake.
00:27:55I mean, I'm a teenage girl in high school, and I don't have much time left.
00:27:59I should enjoy one while I can, right?
00:28:01From what I'm gathering, it sounds like you're still interested in a boyfriend.
00:28:10Something wrong?
00:28:13If I told you you were right, what would you do? Would you volunteer to help me out?
00:28:26What are you trying to say?
00:28:28Don't worry. Not like I meant anything by it.
00:28:33If you think every word that comes out of my mouth has actual meaning, you couldn't be more wrong.
00:28:41Stop reading books so often. Use that time to interact with more people.
00:28:49I'm sorry.
00:28:50Stop reading books so often. Use that time to interact with more people.
00:29:01Hey, Sakura. Up for karaoke today?
00:29:04Of course! Sounds like fun!
00:29:07You want some gum?
00:29:10No thanks. I'll pass.
00:29:12Tell me the truth. Are you and Sakura really not dating?
00:29:16We're not.
00:29:17You've been awfully friendly lately. What's with that?
00:29:24Whoa, wait a sec. You probably think I'm asking because I've got a huge crush on her or something.
00:29:29I don't, okay? Between us guys, I like girls who are a little more ladylike.
00:29:33Quit slacking off.
00:29:35I wasn't slacking off. Why would you even think that? I was just trying to ask him if he wanted some gum.
00:29:41So you were slacking off then. Listen, go throw this away.
00:29:45Oh, right. You got it.
00:29:48I didn't kick you that hard, you big baby.
00:29:54You need to start cleaning up too, you know.
00:30:17Hey, you. Tomorrow starts a long weekend. Let me get straight to the point. Are you free?
00:30:28I thought it might be nice to go on a little vacation over the break.
00:30:31Happen to have any suggestions?
00:30:33Just go to a place you've always wanted to see before you die.
00:30:37Okay, then I'll meet you at the station tomorrow morning.
00:30:40And don't you dare even think about not showing up.
00:30:43Hey.
00:30:44Wait, is that all you're bringing?
00:30:47Pretty much.
00:30:49No change of clothes?
00:30:51What for?
00:30:53Guess you'll have to buy some when we arrive. I'm sure there are clothing stores.
00:30:57Where exactly are you taking me?
00:30:59Hey, why are you so gloomy? We're on vacation, so cheer up, would ya?
00:31:04Feels a bit more like a kidnapping than a vacation, if you ask me.
00:31:08Although I am pretty surprised that your parents actually agreed to this, since it's an overnight trip and all.
00:31:12I told them I was with Kyoko, so it's fine.
00:31:15Whenever I tell my mom and dad about there being something I want to do before I die, they try really hard not to cry and just let me do it.
00:31:22I don't know if they'd let me go on a trip with a boy, though.
00:31:26What kind of excuse are you going to give your parents if they ask about this?
00:31:30I'll call later and say I'm at a friend's house. They already think I have friends, so it'll be fine.
00:31:35I lied to them about it early on, so they wouldn't worry.
00:31:38That's both cruel and sad.
00:31:40I did it as a way to make sure no one gets hurt.
00:31:43Hey, quick question about your last name.
00:31:47Is this how you write it out?
00:31:50Yeah, that's correct.
00:31:52Great, thanks.
00:31:54Hang on a sec. I think I'd prefer it if you didn't put my name in your book.
00:31:58Why's that?
00:32:00Someone might assume things. If your friends or family find this, I don't want them interrogating me because they saw my name.
00:32:06It's my book, so that means I decide what goes in it.
00:32:08I never did ask you what your first name is.
00:32:11If I tell you, you're going to write it in there, aren't you?
00:32:14Well, duh. Come on, what's the big deal?
00:32:23Alright.
00:32:39This is my first time here!
00:32:42I smell yummy ramen!
00:32:44Pretty sure you're just imagining it.
00:32:46I'm not! Maybe you can't smell it because your nose is rotting.
00:32:50At least it's not my brain, like you.
00:32:52No, it's my pancreas that's rotting, silly.
00:32:55Anyway, the world's been so dangerous lately.
00:32:58Sure has. There was a murder in the town next to ours recently.
00:33:02I saw a policeman on TV, so I'm pretty sure he's dead.
00:33:05There's a town next to ours recently.
00:33:07I saw a policeman on TV say that criminals who go around randomly killing people are the hardest to catch.
00:33:12As they say, the righteous suffer and the wicked prosper.
00:33:15I don't think that applies in this case.
00:33:18It has to, considering that's why you're going to survive while I end up dying.
00:33:21I see.
00:33:23Guess some of those old sayings aren't always accurate.
00:33:26I'll keep that in mind.
00:33:36I'm terribly sorry, guys.
00:33:42Then...
00:33:44Hey!
00:33:46What's up?
00:33:48So, uh...
00:33:52You don't mind if we're staying in the same room, do you?
00:33:55Uh...
00:33:58There was a major screw-up with the reservations I made!
00:34:00They said it was completely their fault, so they gave us a nicer room than what I originally reserved!
00:34:05Which means we have to sleep in the same bed! Isn't that exciting?!
00:34:09Yeah, no thanks. I'm fine with sleeping over here.
00:34:12It's not every day you get a nice room like this.
00:34:15You should be able to enjoy time on the bed, too!
00:34:18Fine. If you insist, then I guess I'll try it out later.
00:34:21Well, while you're deciding when to do that, I'll go take a shower.
00:34:25And don't you try to sneak a peek, okay?
00:34:31Okay...
00:34:50Hey!
00:34:52Would you mind grabbing the facial cleanser from inside my bag for me?
00:35:00Okay.
00:35:16Thank you!
00:35:18I'm completely naked, by the way!
00:35:23Say something already! You're making me self-conscious!
00:35:30...
00:35:48Looking out at the city at night like this is pretty romantic, isn't it?
00:35:52Oh, right! While you were in the shower, I got us some drinks from the convenience store downstairs.
00:35:57Here, this one's yours.
00:36:00Thanks a lot.
00:36:05Wait, is this...
00:36:07Aw, don't be a stick in the mud!
00:36:10We've got a deck of cards, so how about we play a card game?
00:36:13Playing with two people is depressing.
00:36:15I'm sure there's a drinking game we could play.
00:36:17I know! We could play a few rounds of Truth or Dare!
00:36:20That sounds a bit too philosophical to be a game.
00:36:23You've never played?
00:36:25Then I'll explain the rules as we play.
00:36:26Oh, so you start a game of Truth or Dare with ten rounds.
00:36:30You're not allowed to quit until those ten rounds are over.
00:36:33We each pick a card, and the one with the higher number is the winner.
00:36:36Got it?
00:36:39Mine's higher!
00:36:41Yes! I win this round!
00:36:43As the winner, that means I get to ask you Truth or Dare.
00:36:46Why don't you just say Truth for now?
00:36:48Alright, then Truth.
00:36:50So let's start off with...
00:36:52If you had to pick from all the girls in our class, who do you think is the cutest?
00:36:54Why would you ask something like that? Who cares?
00:36:57Because that's how Truth or Dare works.
00:37:00If you don't want to answer the question, you can always switch to Dare.
00:37:03But if you do that, I'll be forced to think of something to make you do.
00:37:06And you have to do it. No takebacks.
00:37:08I should mention that if you decide to chicken out and choose Dare instead,
00:37:12there's no way I'm going easy on you.
00:37:15This sounds like a game the devil would play.
00:37:18Oh, and try not to pick anything naughty for me, alright?
00:37:21Are you stupid?
00:37:23So are you actually going to answer the question or what?
00:37:29If I had to pick one...
00:37:31The girl I find the prettiest is...
00:37:34The one who's good at math.
00:37:37Oh, I'm pretty sure you mean Hina.
00:37:40I guess it makes sense that smart girls are your type.
00:37:45Okay, time for the next round.
00:37:48Me again!
00:37:50Alright, Truth or Dare.
00:37:52So what about me then?
00:37:54Where do I rank compared to the rest of the girls in class?
00:38:03I don't remember everyone.
00:38:05But going off the people I do remember...
00:38:09Maybe third?
00:38:11Oh wow, I never expected that you've been seeing me
00:38:14as the third prettiest girl in class this whole time.
00:38:17I do realize I'm the one who made you answer that question,
00:38:20but I think I might be kinda embarrassed.
00:38:23Yeah, well I think you might be kind of an idiot.
00:38:26I wasn't actually expecting you to give me a serious answer!
00:38:34That surprised me.
00:38:36Are we still playing?
00:38:38Duh, that's totally obvious.
00:38:40It's not as obvious as you think.
00:38:42Fine then, are you picking Truth or Dare?
00:38:44Let's do Truth!
00:38:46This one's gonna be real good, I can tell!
00:38:50What were you like back when you were a little kid?
00:38:53That's what you're asking me?
00:38:55Curiosity got me.
00:38:57I wanted to know if you were exactly like this as a kid,
00:39:00or were you different?
00:39:02I thought you said you weren't interested in other people.
00:39:05Although, I have to admit I expected you to ask about my measurements.
00:39:09Shut up.
00:39:13What was I like, huh?
00:39:15Everyone would tell me I was pretty hyperactive.
00:39:17And I kinda remember always getting into fights with the biggest boy in class at the time.
00:39:22I'd say I was a bit of a problem child.
00:39:26What hobby have you kept up the longest?
00:39:29Let's see, I guess I've always liked movies.
00:39:32What's your greatest strength and weakness?
00:39:35I'd have to say my strength is that I can get along with just about anyone.
00:39:39My weakness is probably that I'm easily distracted.
00:39:42What life event made you the happiest?
00:39:44The day I met you was pretty great.
00:39:47What life event was the hardest on you?
00:39:50I think that would have been when the dog I'd had forever passed away.
00:39:54You know, this feels like a job interview.
00:39:58Why are you asking such serious questions? It's boring.
00:40:03Two rounds left.
00:40:05Eleven.
00:40:06Which do you want?
00:40:07The one closest to me.
00:40:10Thirteen.
00:40:11Yes!
00:40:12Thirteen.
00:40:13Yes! Finally!
00:40:19You okay?
00:40:21Since the game's almost over, I'm going to give you a truth and a dare at the same time, and you get to pick one.
00:40:27Sure, I guess.
00:40:29Good. So, if you pick truth, then you have to tell me three things you find cute about me.
00:40:35If you choose dare, then you have to carry me straight to bed.
00:40:40Huh?
00:40:42I'm choosing to help you up, so take my hand.
00:40:46No, that's not going to work.
00:40:48My legs aren't cooperating at all, so I'm stuck on the floor.
00:40:51That's why you gotta carry me.
00:40:53It's the only way.
00:41:10I really appreciate it.
00:41:13There's only one round left.
00:41:15Why don't you try and drink some water?
00:41:19I can't believe you actually did it!
00:41:21Which of the cards do you want?
00:41:23How about... which of the cards do you want?
00:41:26I'm going to choose to help you up, so take my hand.
00:41:30No, that's not going to work.
00:41:32My legs aren't cooperating at all, so I'm stuck on the floor.
00:41:36It's the only way.
00:41:38Whichever one is next to where my cup is sitting.
00:41:43Seven.
00:41:44Wow, that's right in the middle!
00:41:46Middle, middle, middle!
00:41:51What card did you get?
00:41:52Six.
00:41:53You lose!
00:41:57Decisions, decisions.
00:42:09Want some water?
00:42:35Pick one.
00:42:38Truth or dare?
00:42:42I choose truth.
00:42:47Tell me.
00:42:49If I said that I was actually scared of dying, and I mean terrified, what would you do?
00:43:08What's the dare?
00:43:31What's the dare?
00:43:33You have to sleep in the bed too, and you're not allowed to complain or resist.
00:44:04Hello?
00:44:06Sakura, where the hell are you right now?
00:44:10Oh, hey, good morning, Kyoko.
00:44:12I can't believe you lied to your parents and told them we were on a trip together!
00:44:16They called my parents about it, and I barely convinced them that it was okay!
00:44:19I knew I could count on you. I appreciate it.
00:44:22What were you thinking, running off on a trip by yourself?
00:44:25You're not like some cat who's about to die.
00:44:27Don't worry, I'm not here alone.
00:44:29Who are you with? Your boyfriend?
00:44:32Don't tell me.
00:44:34Him?
00:44:36I promise I'll tell you all about what's going on someday, so don't be mad, Kyoko, please.
00:44:40And while I know you don't approve of it, you think you can at least forgive me?
00:44:45All right, fine.
00:44:47But I do have a few conditions.
00:44:49You had better come back home safe, and bring me a souvenir from wherever you are.
00:44:53Also, I want you to go on a trip with me over summer break.
00:44:58Yeah, you got it.
00:45:00And make sure that he knows.
00:45:02If he lays a finger on you, then I'll kill him myself!
00:45:06I'll tell him. See you back at school.
00:45:08Yeah.
00:45:11I'm guessing you might have heard that.
00:45:13But, uh, it kinda sounds like Kyoko's gonna kill you.
00:45:16If I do anything weird, right?
00:45:18Well, make sure she knows I'm innocent and I never laid a hand on you.
00:45:21You did. Princess carried me.
00:45:23Huh. I didn't realize it had a name.
00:45:26I felt less like a prince, and a lot more like a moving company.
00:45:30Either way, if she finds out you took me to bed like that, she'll kill you.
00:45:43It's over, huh? Feels like it went by so fast.
00:45:47Yeah.
00:45:50That jacket looks good on you, by the way.
00:45:52It's not like I had a choice. It was all I had to wear.
00:45:57The next day
00:46:00This is my stop, so I gotta get going now.
00:46:02Uh, how about we go on another trip?
00:46:05Maybe in winter. That could be nice.
00:46:09Yeah, sure. Just keep me posted.
00:46:12Really? You usually try to protest a lot more.
00:46:15You actually had fun on our trip, didn't you?
00:46:18Hm. Can't wait for the next one.
00:46:22Huh?
00:46:25Ah!
00:46:35When I got back home, the next several days felt painfully uneventful.
00:46:40And then it hit me.
00:46:43I'd been waiting for her to contact me the whole time.
00:46:48After the break was finally over, she wasn't the only one to reach out.
00:46:53It seems her guardian wanted to have a few words with me.
00:46:57What the hell were you thinking going on a trip alone with Sakura like that?
00:47:02She may not look it, but she's a lot more fragile than most people are.
00:47:06When she broke up with her boyfriend in middle school, she cried all throughout the night.
00:47:11She was so depressed I was scared she'd never recover.
00:47:14It was the same when her favorite teacher moved away, or when her parents got into fights.
00:47:19Are you even listening to me?
00:47:21You haven't known her anywhere near long enough to realize how delicate she is.
00:47:25Someone has to stay by her side at all times so they can keep an eye on her.
00:47:29Do you think you're capable of that?
00:47:32How do you actually feel about Sakura anyway?
00:47:41Answer me already, dammit!
00:47:44Look, if you don't really care about Sakura, then stay away from her.
00:47:49Because if I ever find out that you hurt her,
00:47:52I'll never forgive you and make sure you regret it.
00:47:55I'll never forgive you and make sure you regret it.
00:48:12Ah, you're late, you know.
00:48:14I had to finish everything on my own.
00:48:16So all the return books are back where they belong.
00:48:19Sorry, I lost track of time talking to someone.
00:48:22Guess I can forgive you.
00:48:24Believe it or not, we can't go anywhere while it's still raining outside.
00:48:29Come over to my house today.
00:48:33Hey!
00:48:35Are you even listening?
00:48:37Huh?
00:48:39What do you think about coming over to my place today?
00:48:41No one's home right now.
00:48:44I'm gonna pass.
00:48:45You live in the opposite direction from me.
00:48:48Aw, come on, that's not a good excuse at all.
00:48:51While I've never really been the type of person who reads in their spare time,
00:48:55there's been one book that I've absolutely loved ever since I was younger.
00:49:01Aren't you curious about what it is?
00:49:06Yeah, a little.
00:49:08The books you like tend to say a lot about who you are as a human being.
00:49:12Which is it?
00:49:13Have you ever heard of one called The Little Prince?
00:49:16By Saint-Exupery?
00:49:17Wait, you have heard of it?
00:49:19It's written by a foreign author, so I thought it might be a book I knew of that you didn't,
00:49:23but I guess you know everything.
00:49:25What a letdown.
00:49:27Even people who aren't avid readers have heard of The Little Prince.
00:49:30You not knowing that tells me how little you care about books.
00:49:34Well, excuse me.
00:49:35So I take it that means you've probably read it, huh?
00:49:41Actually, I haven't had a chance to.
00:49:43Are you serious?
00:49:44Then you need to come over right away so you can borrow my copy!
00:49:47It's amazing and I'd really love to hear what you think about it.
00:49:50Come on!
00:49:59Eat my dust.
00:50:01Oh, go grab that item.
00:50:05Didn't you bring me here to lend me a book?
00:50:07Come on now, you don't have to be in such a hurry to leave.
00:50:11Look.
00:50:14Hey, there's something that's been on my mind lately.
00:50:17Have you ever considered finding a girlfriend?
00:50:21I doubt that I could even if I wanted to.
00:50:24It's not like I have friends.
00:50:26Well, if not a girlfriend, then you should try making a friend or two.
00:50:30Yeah, I'll think about it.
00:50:32That's basically you saying no thanks, isn't it?
00:50:41Hey, so...
00:50:42Yeah?
00:50:45Am I right in saying you have absolutely no interest in me as a girlfriend?
00:50:53I can't believe you crashed!
00:50:56Where did that even come from?
00:51:00Just wanted to make sure, I guess.
00:51:05You're right.
00:51:06Well, that's good.
00:51:08I'm relieved to hear it.
00:51:12Where's that book?
00:51:14I'm leaving.
00:51:15Huh?
00:51:16Wait, you don't have to leave so soon.
00:51:39Huh?
00:51:40Huh?
00:51:49There's something else I wanted to do before I die.
00:51:52Would you like to know what it is?
00:51:57It's doing something naughty with someone I'm not dating.
00:52:00Someone I'm not even in love with.
00:52:03You fit the role perfectly.
00:52:05Really?
00:52:07This is just a hug.
00:52:18And all of the naughty stuff comes next.
00:52:22Someone has to stay by her side at all times so they can keep an eye on her.
00:52:26Do you think you're capable of that?
00:52:29Someone has to stay by her side at all times so they can keep an eye on her.
00:52:33Do you think you're capable of that?
00:52:48Really fooled you, didn't I?
00:52:50You weren't saying anything, so it was super easy to catch on.
00:52:53Really fooled you, didn't I?
00:52:55You weren't saying anything, so it was super easy to catch on.
00:53:00Did it excite you?
00:53:02It was embarrassing, but I'm glad I was able to pull it off.
00:53:06I'm really good at pulling pranks, I know.
00:53:09Try not to be too angry.
00:53:11What were you thinking?
00:53:24What's gotten into you?
00:53:26You can get off now, this hurts.
00:53:28Are you trying to play along with my joke?
00:53:31That seems out of character for you.
00:53:33You're free to stop at any time.
00:53:38Are you listening?
00:53:43This isn't funny anymore!
00:53:45You don't really think this is an appropriate thing to do to someone, do you?
00:53:49Knock it off!
00:53:51I'm serious, let me go already!
00:53:57Please!
00:54:21Hey!
00:54:29Hey!
00:54:43Do you live around this area?
00:54:45No, I don't.
00:54:47And neither do you, so why are you here?
00:54:50Sakura, right?
00:54:52I'm right, aren't I? Answer me!
00:54:55Man, what does Sakura even see in a guy like you?
00:55:00Don't worry about it. My relationship with her isn't really what you think it is.
00:55:05Yeah, well what else could it be then?
00:55:07The two of you go out to eat together, you get coffee, you go on trips,
00:55:10and today I find you walking away from her house!
00:55:12You're all the class is talking about.
00:55:15I'm trying to tell you that you and the rest of our classmates are making something out of nothing.
00:55:20And yet she's still spending a lot of her free time with someone like you.
00:55:23Why is that?
00:55:25Why is she choosing to waste her time with someone who's so depressing?
00:55:30Hey! I'm not done talking to you!
00:55:36Listen, let me give you some advice.
00:55:39Maybe it'll help you out at some point.
00:55:42Apparently, she doesn't like guys who are too pushy.
00:55:45Her last boyfriend was like that, I guess.
00:55:49What the hell do you mean, pushy?
00:55:51You bastard, you don't know a damn thing about me!
00:55:56Takahiro? What are you doing?
00:56:00Oh, Sakura. Wow, what a coincidence.
00:56:03The two of us were just talking about you.
00:56:05What did you do to him?
00:56:08Are you okay?
00:56:10Oh no, you're bleeding.
00:56:13Sakura, why do you care about this loser anyway?
00:56:17This loser? What are you trying to say?
00:56:19He's refusing to leave you alone and it pisses me off.
00:56:22So that's why I punched him.
00:56:24I can't believe you. Do you think you're above him or something?
00:56:27You jerk! You're the absolute worst person I've ever met in my life!
00:56:31Don't you dare bother me or the people close to me again, got it?
00:56:36But I... I did all of this for you.
00:56:39Just leave!
00:56:45Does it hurt?
00:56:50He was your last boyfriend, wasn't he?
00:57:00Why did I bother going along with you?
00:57:03Someone like me shouldn't get involved with others.
00:57:06If I'd kept to myself, nobody would have gotten hurt.
00:57:09What are you even saying?
00:57:11You should just forget about me.
00:57:13Go spend more time with people who actually care about you,
00:57:15like your ex-boyfriend in Kyoko.
00:57:22The day we met,
00:57:25it was a coincidence that never should have happened.
00:57:29That's not true.
00:57:31It wasn't a coincidence at all.
00:57:34How can you be so sure?
00:57:37Everyone makes choices, and all those choices matter.
00:57:41I don't think we ended up at the same school,
00:57:43let alone the same class, by pure chance.
00:57:45But it wasn't fate either.
00:57:47That's just your interpretation of it.
00:57:51When I started writing Living with Dying,
00:57:54I chose to do it in that book.
00:57:57You like books,
00:57:59so you picked it up when you saw it lying on the ground that day.
00:58:03And then, for some reason,
00:58:06you agreed to do the things I asked you to do.
00:58:10Every single choice you've made so far
00:58:13has been the right choice.
00:58:15No matter how big or small,
00:58:17or how certain we were at the time,
00:58:19they eventually piled up and created the path that led us together.
00:58:26And all of those choices
00:58:28are exactly what brought us to this moment right here.
00:58:32Look, I...
00:58:34I'm sorry.
00:58:39I wanted to tell you
00:58:41I'm really happy that you're here with me right now,
00:58:44more than you'll ever know.
00:58:48I'm sorry.
00:58:52I'm sorry.
00:58:56I'm sorry.
00:59:01That's why...
00:59:05If you don't mind,
00:59:07even if it's only a bit longer,
00:59:13will you please stay with me?
00:59:17I'm sorry.
00:59:29There isn't anything I can do for you,
00:59:32so are you sure you want that?
00:59:40But you've already done so much.
00:59:43I'm really sorry about earlier.
00:59:49Why don't you come back inside so I can give you a change of clothes?
00:59:57Thanks for everything.
01:00:03Thanks for what?
01:00:08I always read books in the order they're placed on my shelf,
01:00:12so it might be a while.
01:00:14Just be sure to give it back to me next year.
01:00:17Since we'll be friends until I die, right?
01:00:42When we'd gotten halfway through her bucket list,
01:00:45the reality of her situation became far more clear to me
01:00:48than it had ever been before.
01:00:53The next thing I knew, she had to be hospitalized.
01:00:57She tried to hide her illness behind her bright smile,
01:01:01but it continued to eat her up inside.
01:01:06I'm sorry.
01:01:08She tried to hide her illness behind her bright smile,
01:01:11but it continued to eat her up inside.
01:01:14It was the sad truth.
01:01:34I'm glad to see you're doing okay.
01:01:37I feel dumb for worrying.
01:01:39Well, yeah, of course I'm okay.
01:01:41My parents were just being overdramatic
01:01:43because the numbers from some tests came back a bit weird this time around.
01:01:46It's nothing to worry about, though.
01:01:48I'm more concerned our plans for summer break are completely ruined because of this.
01:01:51We can't even go to the festival this coming weekend.
01:01:54It totally sucks.
01:01:56That's not the last festival, you know.
01:01:58We can go to a different one.
01:02:02So, how'd you end up explaining this hospital visit to Kyoko?
01:02:06I told her I had to get my appendix removed,
01:02:08and the hospital staff agreed to play along.
01:02:11Has the rest of the class said anything?
01:02:14There's a rumor going around that you've been forced to skip school for a bit
01:02:17because I'm stalking you.
01:02:19It's all pretty annoying.
01:02:23You know why that rumor probably started in the first place?
01:02:26Because I've been hanging out with you, I guess?
01:02:29No, silly.
01:02:30It's because you don't talk to people enough for them to get to know you.
01:02:33I think if you did, then they'd finally realize that you're actually a pretty neat guy.
01:02:38I already know for a fact that no one wants to talk to a boring classmate.
01:02:42Are you doing that thing where you try to imagine how everyone else feels about you again?
01:02:47How about giving that hobby up?
01:02:49There are plenty of nice people in our class, so you should try getting along with a few of them.
01:02:53If it doesn't benefit anyone, why bother?
01:02:56Why do you always have to be so negative?
01:03:00At the very least, I hope you and Kyoko can get along someday.
01:03:08Question.
01:03:09Yeah?
01:03:10While you're here visiting, you think we could play at least one round of Truth or Dare? Please?
01:03:15Seriously?
01:03:21All right.
01:03:22You will?
01:03:23Well, he did lend me that book.
01:03:25Guess that means I owe you one.
01:03:28Thank you.
01:03:34Oops, the odds were against me there, huh?
01:03:37That's just how things go sometimes, I suppose.
01:03:40All right, go on.
01:03:42Ask me anything you want to know.
01:03:44Are you curious about my first kiss?
01:03:47Hey, don't ignore me.
01:03:48You really need to take more of an interest in me while you still have a chance to.
01:03:52In fact, try taking more of an interest in people in general.
01:03:55So I've been wondering lately.
01:03:57Huh?
01:03:58What exactly does being alive mean to you?
01:04:02Oh man, you're asking something serious?
01:04:09Being alive...
01:04:11Wow, that's a real tricky one.
01:04:25I got it.
01:04:29From what I've experienced, I believe life shows us that being alive means reaching out to the hearts of all the people who affect ours.
01:04:40Accepting someone else.
01:04:42Coming to like someone.
01:04:44Telling someone you hate their guts.
01:04:47Having fun being with a really good friend.
01:04:50Even holding someone's hand.
01:04:53Those prove you're alive.
01:04:59If you're always alone, how can you know if you even exist?
01:05:04I think the relationships we have with other people are what show that we're truly alive in this world.
01:05:11My heart only exists because of the people in my life right now.
01:05:16My body only exists because of all the people who come in contact with it.
01:05:22Most people don't really think about it, but life is filled with so much meaning.
01:05:26The two of us, for example.
01:05:28The reason we're alive is because of all the choices we've made so far.
01:05:36Huh? What's wrong?
01:05:44It's amazing.
01:05:46You probably don't realize, but I've learned a lot from you.
01:05:50Huh? Where's all this coming from?
01:05:53It's embarrassing.
01:06:01I mean it, though.
01:06:04So thank you.
01:06:15Look, I...
01:06:16This isn't like it was last time.
01:06:18It's not a prank, I promise.
01:06:20What is it, then?
01:06:23It's kind of weird, but lately, I've really liked feeling other people's warmth.
01:06:29You seem a little off today. Are you all right?
01:06:32Mm-hmm. Everything's fine.
01:06:38All I want right now is to enjoy the truth and normal life you've provided me.
01:06:48Kiyoko?
01:06:54What the hell do you think you're doing to her?
01:06:56Kiyoko?
01:06:57Hey! We never finished our conversation from the other...
01:06:59Kiyoko!
01:07:01I'm glad you came. I missed you so much.
01:07:04You scared me, you know that?
01:07:06I can't believe you got appendicitis.
01:07:08Don't you dare walk away from...
01:07:10Now that you're here, I feel a lot better than I did before.
01:07:14Listen, I just need to talk to him about something for a second.
01:07:18Come on, Sakura, let me go!
01:07:20No way! If I let you go, then I can't feel your warmth!
01:07:23Can't we do this some other time?
01:07:25Kiyoko!
01:07:26What am I gonna do with you?
01:07:35I heard that Kiyoko came by earlier.
01:07:38Mm-hmm.
01:07:41I put a change of clothes in here for you.
01:07:43Thanks. I appreciate it.
01:07:49Oh, by the way, Mom.
01:07:54There's something I want you to do after I die.
01:07:57Sakura, I don't want to hear talk about dying.
01:08:03Well, there's something I want you to do for me.
01:08:06You won't have to worry about doing it for a while, though.
01:08:15Sure.
01:08:18Thanks.
01:08:31Some time had passed since I visited her in the hospital.
01:08:34I soon discovered what might have been the reason I got such a strange vibe from her that day.
01:08:41She was told she had to stay there two weeks longer than originally planned.
01:08:46I made my way over to the hospital right after school.
01:08:52And I'll admit, I was completely scared out of my mind.
01:09:10You're not playing a joke on me, are you?
01:09:12Were you even allowed to leave that place?
01:09:14Stop worrying. It's fine.
01:09:21This way.
01:09:23Are you planning a double suicide? Somewhere we can't be found?
01:09:28That's not such a bad idea.
01:09:38Did you know? You can see this from the hospital.
01:09:42I was positive the view from here would be incredible.
01:09:46And this couldn't wait until you were out of the hospital.
01:09:49It definitely had to be tonight.
01:09:54You're acting weird again. Something wrong?
01:10:02Hey.
01:10:04You won't die, right?
01:10:07Huh?
01:10:11Well, of course I will. Everybody does eventually, don't they?
01:10:14That's not what I'm trying to say.
01:10:17If it's about my pancreas, then yeah, I'm gonna die.
01:10:20But I'm pretty sure you knew that.
01:10:22No. What I mean is...
01:10:30Despite the way I look or act when we hang out, I'm worried about you.
01:10:37I'm sorry.
01:10:43Does that mean you want me to live?
01:10:46Yes. I do.
01:10:53What is it?
01:10:55I just... I'm lucky to have someone who cares about me this much.
01:11:01I promise. When I'm going to die, I'll be sure to let you know.
01:11:11Oh! It's starting!
01:11:30Mabuta hiraite nokoru yoru no zanzou
01:11:37You remember, don't you? When I mentioned seeing fireworks?
01:11:40It had to be tonight or else we'd miss them.
01:11:44Are you glad you came?
01:11:48I haven't really decided yet.
01:11:49Seriously? Come on, don't be like that.
01:11:54Alright then.
01:11:56Time to thank me.
01:12:01Thank you.
01:12:19I feel bad about making you worry for nothing.
01:12:22So once I'm out of the hospital, I'll go to the beach with you to make up for it.
01:12:28Isn't that kind of arrogant for an apology?
01:12:31You don't want to go?
01:12:34Of course I do.
01:12:58Thank you.
01:12:59Thank you.
01:13:00Thank you.
01:13:01Thank you.
01:13:24Part of me was afraid that by making plans to do something after she got out of the hospital,
01:13:28we would jinx things somehow.
01:13:31Luckily, I was wrong.
01:13:34And before we knew it, they let her go home.
01:13:43Hey, I've been wondering.
01:13:46Yeah?
01:13:47Did you get a girlfriend?
01:13:49Huh?
01:13:50She's not then?
01:13:52Do you have a crush on her?
01:13:54Either way, it'd be nice if you brought her over sometime.
01:13:58Sorry, but you're looking way too into this.
01:14:02Hmm.
01:14:03So I guess she's just a friend of yours, huh?
01:14:07Well, it doesn't really matter what she is.
01:14:09You finally have someone who sees you for who you truly are,
01:14:12and that's all I ever wanted for you.
01:14:16Oh, come on.
01:14:17You didn't actually think I hadn't seen through your lies, did you?
01:14:20Don't underestimate your mom.
01:14:29SAKURA
01:14:35Yo!
01:14:38It's another scorcher today.
01:14:40Where are you off to?
01:14:43I'm going to meet someone.
01:14:45You're hanging out with Sakura, aren't you?
01:14:47Man, you're one lucky guy.
01:14:51See ya.
01:14:53Uh...
01:14:57Want some gum?
01:15:00No, thanks. I'll pass.
01:15:03How come you got an ice pop and we didn't, big bro?
01:15:05That's no fair!
01:15:06Yeah, it's no fair at all!
01:15:07What are you doing?
01:15:08Hey, cut it out!
01:15:09I want one!
01:15:10Then you should have bought an ice pop instead of a squirt gun!
01:15:12Come on, stop it already!
01:15:14All right, fine! I'll buy you one!
01:15:17Awesome! Let's go find what we want!
01:15:19Okay!
01:15:22You know what?
01:15:23Yeah?
01:15:25I will take a piece of gum, if you don't mind.
01:15:28Not at all! Here!
01:15:33Nice catch, man!
01:15:35Well, hope you guys have fun!
01:15:40We will, thanks.
01:15:45Something inside me had shifted.
01:15:47I used to be completely indifferent.
01:15:50But at some point, she changed me.
01:15:54No.
01:15:56I bet if you asked her, she'd say that it was my own choice to change.
01:16:02Like when I chose to pick up living with dying from the hospital lobby floor.
01:16:08Then chose to do whatever she said.
01:16:11And now...
01:16:13I've chosen to stay by her side.
01:16:20Sorry, just leaving the house now.
01:16:24Congrats on getting out of the hospital.
01:16:26I'll be at Cafe Springs, so come by when you can.
01:16:29Wow, it's been a while, so I'm surprised you even remember that place!
01:16:36I thought you'd appreciate it. That's why I picked it.
01:16:39Oh, hey, you're actually being nice for once.
01:16:42You're not feeling sick, are you?
01:16:44Unlike you, I'm perfectly healthy.
01:16:47You big meanie, that one really hurt my feelings.
01:16:50Now you have to compliment me as punishment.
01:16:59You know, I think you're pretty amazing.
01:17:04The complete opposite of me.
01:17:07If I'm being honest, I'd do anything to be the kind of person you are.
01:17:13One who accepts others.
01:17:16And can be accepted.
01:17:19Someone who loves.
01:17:21And can be loved.
01:17:24Can you teach me?
01:17:26I want to learn how to be just like you.
01:17:45I love you.
01:18:15Hope you have a nice evening.
01:18:30...and said they intend to solve the problem as soon as possible.
01:18:34Our next story, a fatal stabbing in Kitakura City.
01:18:38Isn't that pretty close to us?
01:18:40Yeah, I think you're right.
01:18:42According to reports, the girl was identified as a student at a local high school.
01:18:4617-year-old Sakura Yamauchi.
01:18:49Someone in the neighborhood found her lying on the street,
01:18:52bleeding from a deep stab wound in her chest.
01:18:56At the time she was found, she was unconscious but alive.
01:18:59Hey, what's wrong?
01:19:01An ambulance was called to the scene in order to rush her over to a nearby hospital.
01:19:04However, she was taken to a nearby hospital.
01:19:07Hey, what's wrong?
01:19:08An ambulance was called to the scene in order to rush her over to a nearby hospital.
01:19:11However, she died shortly after.
01:19:16The suspect fled, but was arrested by authorities and has admitted to the crime.
01:19:20The killer is believed to be the same person responsible for another random killing three months ago.
01:19:28Did something happen?
01:19:37No.
01:19:57She...
01:19:59She broke her promise to let me know when she was going to die.
01:20:03And I broke my promise to give her back her favorite book that I had borrowed.
01:20:08She was gone.
01:20:10Forever.
01:20:32Sakura Yamauchi
01:20:39Almost ten days had passed.
01:20:42Ten days since she had been murdered.
01:20:49At that point, I had calmed down enough to accept reality,
01:20:52as sad as it was.
01:20:56Once I'd processed my feelings, I realized something.
01:20:59I was finally ready.
01:21:03I was determined to face the end of this story.
01:21:08Wait a second.
01:21:10Use this to give her a proper goodbye.
01:21:30Your daughter.
01:21:32She was extremely kind to me when she was alive.
01:21:36I, uh...
01:21:38There's something I should tell you.
01:21:40Hm? What is it?
01:21:43You see...
01:21:45I knew about the illness she was suffering from.
01:21:48She told me she was dying from it.
01:21:50That's why...
01:21:52I didn't expect this.
01:21:54She still had time.
01:21:57So you know.
01:21:58She didn't tell anyone else in class other than me.
01:22:03There was one other thing I wanted to do besides pay my respects.
01:22:08I'm looking for a book of hers.
01:22:11When your daughter first got sick, she started keeping a diary.
01:22:16Called, Living with Dying.
01:22:19It was a book about her.
01:22:22Called, Living with Dying.
01:22:26Then...
01:22:27It was you.
01:22:29Huh?
01:22:30Thank you.
01:22:32I'm so glad you came here.
01:22:35I really, truly am.
01:22:45This is it, correct?
01:22:48I believe so.
01:22:49Would you mind if I look through it?
01:22:51Oh, yes, go right ahead.
01:22:54Thank you, ma'am.
01:22:56Just so you know, she actually intended for you to have this.
01:23:01Sakura told me once...
01:23:03That when she died, there was somebody who she wanted to pass this diary on to.
01:23:10She said...
01:23:12There was only one person, one of her classmates, who knew she was sick.
01:23:17And was also aware of Living with Dying.
01:23:22Sakura mentioned that this person was a coward.
01:23:25So he was likely not going to be at the funeral.
01:23:29However, he would most certainly come to the house looking for this.
01:23:36Thank you.
01:23:38I can't say it enough.
01:23:41Because of you, she was able to...
01:23:48Chapter 5
01:23:54April 22
01:23:56Today was the first time I told someone outside the family about my pancreatic disease.
01:24:02He happened to find this book laying on the floor of the hospital lobby and started reading it.
01:24:07So I just figured, why not tell him?
01:24:10But weirdly enough, he didn't seem surprised by it at all.
01:24:13He's an interesting guy.
01:24:16He probably doesn't have many friends, which means I'm not too worried about him telling anyone.
01:24:23I'd actually been curious about him for quite some time now.
01:24:26He's always reading a book.
01:24:28It's like he's having a silent battle with himself or something.
01:24:32You wouldn't think it, but he's a lot of fun to talk to.
01:24:35I took a liking to him immediately.
01:24:37Cause why not?
01:24:40He's different from everyone else I've met.
01:24:43I want to get to know him better, considering he knows my secret and all.
01:24:48That grilled meat was so good!
01:24:50I had a lot of fun today.
01:24:52Before I die, I'm definitely going to convince him that organ meats taste amazing.
01:24:58When I'm with him, I start to feel a little better.
01:25:04I want to do something naughty with a boy I'm not dating at some point.
01:25:08I'll write about my trip when I get back.
01:25:12Today was awful, but great at the same time.
01:25:17After he left, I started crying.
01:25:21That's all I've done today.
01:25:25I was hospitalized, and I'll have to stay here for at least two weeks.
01:25:29I said something about numbers being off, which makes me a little...
01:25:34Well, there's no point in me lying here.
01:25:37I'm really scared.
01:25:39But I won't let anyone see that I am.
01:25:42I'm not lying. I'm just... not letting it show.
01:25:48He walked in while I was in the middle of dancing to try to shake off my fear.
01:25:52I cried both out of embarrassment and relief that he'd come to visit me,
01:25:56though I tried my best to hide it.
01:25:59We ended up having a fun time.
01:26:01It made me feel a lot better.
01:26:04When he asked me if something had happened, I almost cried again.
01:26:09Then Kyoko surprised me by showing up out of nowhere.
01:26:12I would really like it if the two of them could get along.
01:26:18I've lost half the time I have left.
01:26:26I'm so happy.
01:26:28I actually don't know if I've ever been this happy to be alive before today.
01:26:32I just never would have imagined he needed me so much.
01:26:36But I was glad he did.
01:26:39Once I was alone again, the tears wouldn't stop.
01:26:45I'm leaving the hospital tomorrow!
01:26:48Now it's time to enjoy the rest of my life!
01:27:05Thank you.
01:27:13Thank you for showing me this.
01:27:16There's more.
01:27:19Keep reading because I believe what you wanted you to see might be a little further in.
01:27:35And lastly, to you.
01:28:06As you can see, I didn't write your name down.
01:28:09Since you did tell me not to after all.
01:28:13Hope you're doing well!
01:28:18I'm giving this diary to you.
01:28:20My mom already knows about it.
01:28:23I told her I wrote a lot of messages to people.
01:28:26But that I'd let you decide if you would show them or throw this away.
01:28:30Hey!
01:28:31I figured it was probably the least I could do to thank you for all that you've given me.
01:28:38You may have already read this, but I've actually had my eye on you for a long time.
01:28:43Even before we first met.
01:28:46I always assumed you and I were on opposite sides of the spectrum and wouldn't have anything in common.
01:28:51But I'm glad we managed to become close despite that.
01:28:55And to be completely honest, as we got to know each other more,
01:28:59there were plenty of times I thought I'd fallen in love with you.
01:29:02Being with you made my heart flutter.
01:29:05However, our relationship wasn't exactly normal, was it?
01:29:09It didn't classify as love or even friendship.
01:29:13And I think I might know why that is.
01:29:16Do you remember that day we played truth or dare at the hospital?
01:29:19The real reason I wanted to play was so I could ask you something I've been curious about.
01:29:26If you'd picked truth,
01:29:29I'd plan to ask you,
01:29:30why don't you call me by my name when we hang out together?
01:29:34If I had to take a guess,
01:29:36you were probably scared of letting me become someone important in your life.
01:29:41Your hobby is imagining what everyone around you thinks of you.
01:29:45More specifically, it's what they think of you when they hear your name, right?
01:29:50You didn't want to tell me your name because you didn't want me imagining who you really were or weren't.
01:29:56And you already knew you'd lose me eventually.
01:29:59So you were afraid of making me a girlfriend or even just a friend.
01:30:03Well, did I get it right or not?
01:30:05If I actually did, make an offering at my grave to let me know, okay?
01:30:12Want to know a secret?
01:30:14That's why I refused to say your name when we hung out too.
01:30:17Did you notice?
01:30:20But I don't want you to take this as me criticizing you for being a coward.
01:30:24What I'm trying to tell you is,
01:30:27I've always really looked up to you.
01:30:31You're an amazing person and I mean it.
01:30:34That's not true.
01:30:36It's like you said, I'm just a coward.
01:30:40Like most things about me, my charm only exists if there are people to interact with it.
01:30:45It's the same for everyone.
01:30:47Your relationships with others are what make you who you are.
01:30:51I told you once before,
01:30:53I believe that's what it means to be alive.
01:30:57You're right.
01:30:59However, you never actually established those relationships, did you?
01:31:05Yet you were still able to create your own charm,
01:31:07not through your connections with others, but by looking inside yourself.
01:31:12When I realized, I wanted to explore my true self too.
01:31:23That night we snuck out to watch the fireworks,
01:31:26you told me you were worried about me.
01:31:28The same special night you told me you wanted me to live.
01:31:32In that moment, I truly felt like I was someone unique.
01:31:37It was a feeling I've never had before.
01:31:42I grew up thinking I was pretty much the same as all the other hundreds of thousands of high school kids.
01:31:47The only thing different about me was that I had a slightly shorter lifespan than everyone else I knew.
01:31:53And yet, even though I wasn't anyone special,
01:31:56you found reasons to care about me.
01:32:00You came along with me wherever I went and did whatever I said,
01:32:03never aiming to make me your friend or girlfriend.
01:32:07It's like you chose me for me.
01:32:11It took me 17 years to realize,
01:32:13but maybe I was waiting for you to need me this whole time.
01:32:17Just like the cherry blossoms, waiting for spring.
01:32:23You know, I think it's pretty amazing how you're able to make someone so happy.
01:32:34I'm not the person you think I am at all.
01:32:37Before I died, there was something I wanted to tell you.
01:32:42I hope that I can be the kind of person you are one day.
01:32:47But saying it like that didn't fully convey what I meant.
01:32:51When it comes to our relationship, ordinary words and phrases aren't enough to express it.
01:32:58Her phone. Sakura's phone. Do you still have it?
01:33:03So I came up with something that would.
01:33:06You didn't like the idea when I first told you about it,
01:33:09but basically...
01:33:14I want to eat your pancreas.
01:33:21No.
01:33:23She did see it. Before she...
01:33:33Ma'am?
01:33:35What is it?
01:33:37Sorry. I know this probably isn't the right time for it, but...
01:33:45Do you mind if I go ahead and cry?
01:33:50Mm-hmm.
01:34:10To be honest, I was really happy to know that you needed me.
01:34:15To know that you read my message.
01:34:18You were always so quick to point out how we were totally different people.
01:34:23And you were right.
01:34:25We were always watching each other.
01:34:28It didn't occur to me until recently,
01:34:31but it's almost like you were my whole reason for living.
01:34:35All the choices I made, whether they were intentional or not,
01:34:39I made them just so I could meet you.
01:34:42Thank you.
01:34:48Sorry I broke down. I should have held it in.
01:34:52No need to apologize.
01:34:54I'll always be incredibly thankful to you for giving my daughter something so special.
01:35:01Actually, it was more the other way around, but thank you.
01:35:10Don't feel pressured to say yes, but if you ever have a free evening,
01:35:14I would love for you and Kyoko to come over and join our family for dinner someday.
01:35:20By the way, I don't think Sakura ever told me what your name is.
01:35:25My name is Haruki Shiga. It means spring tree.
01:35:31What a perfect name to match Sakura's.
01:35:39I never did ask you what your first name is.
01:35:42It's Haruki. Haruki Shiga.
01:35:45Wow, we're like two peas in a pod then.
01:35:48I'm really glad I talked to you that day.
01:35:52Duh! Cherry blossoms in spring!
01:35:57It's starting to make sense now.
01:35:59All the choices I made, intentional or not, were made just so I could meet you.
01:36:12I love you, Haruki.
01:36:15I love you, too.
01:36:18I love you, too.
01:36:21I love you, too.
01:36:24I love you, too.
01:36:27I love you, too.
01:36:30I love you, too.
01:36:33I love you, too.
01:36:36I love you, too.
01:36:38I love you, too.
01:36:56Let's get this over with, okay?
01:37:01By the way, you didn't come to Sakura's funeral.
01:37:06Why not?
01:37:08I guess I just...
01:37:15Sorry.
01:37:20Thanks for meeting me here.
01:37:22This is the first time we've really talked, huh?
01:37:27To be honest, I wanted to reach out a bit sooner than this.
01:37:31But I wasn't quite sure how to broach the subject...
01:37:33Just make it quick.
01:37:36Of course. Sorry.
01:37:39I called you here so I could show you this book.
01:37:43What is it?
01:37:44She called it Living With Dying.
01:37:48Sakura's handwriting!
01:37:50This is her diary.
01:37:53She left it to me in the will she wrote before she died.
01:37:56What are you talking about?
01:37:58Why would she even have a will?
01:38:01The truth is...
01:38:03she had an illness.
01:38:05That can't be true.
01:38:06She never mentioned being sick.
01:38:08How come you know about something that I don't?
01:38:10Because I was the only one she told about it.
01:38:13Kyoko.
01:38:15She ended up dying because of a stab wound.
01:38:17But even if that hadn't happened, she would've...
01:38:22Stop it!
01:38:24I can't.
01:38:26I want you to read this.
01:38:28She may have liked pulling pranks,
01:38:30but she'd never do anything to hurt you.
01:38:32And I know that for a fact.
01:38:58I'm sorry.
01:39:28I'm sorry.
01:39:41Tell me why.
01:39:43Why wasn't I ever told about this?
01:39:45It's because she didn't want to...
01:39:46Not by Sakura.
01:39:48I meant by you!
01:39:50If you'd just told me,
01:39:53then I would've tried to spend a lot more time with her.
01:39:56I would've skipped classes or put the club I was in.
01:39:59But now it's too late for all that.
01:40:04And it's your fault.
01:40:07It doesn't matter how important you were to Sakura
01:40:10or how much she needed you.
01:40:13I'll never forgive you.
01:40:26I'll never forgive you.
01:40:42Wait up!
01:40:47Look.
01:40:49You're free to take as much time as you need,
01:40:51but please forgive me.
01:40:54And if...
01:40:56if you ever find it in your heart to do that,
01:41:00maybe someday...
01:41:12the two of us could become friends.
01:41:24I'm sorry.
01:41:26I'm sorry.
01:41:27I'm sorry.
01:41:28I'm sorry.
01:41:29I'm sorry.
01:41:30I'm sorry.
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01:48:37I'm sorry.