Cartoon Planet Cartoon Planet E019 Toot Toot!
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😹
FunTranscript
00:00Hey Brack, how much do you tip?
00:02Oh, I can usually go about 30 degrees.
00:05Any more than that and I fall right on my head!
00:08Zorak means how much gratuity do you leave?
00:11At a restaurant.
00:12Like I said, I'll do about 30 degrees and then boom!
00:15Over I go!
00:16Five seconds!
00:17I like to leave 20% if the service is excellent,
00:20and 15% if it's just average.
00:23And if the service is really lousy, I set off a stink bomb and run!
00:30Hello everybody!
00:55Welcome to Cooking with Brack!
00:57You know, everybody at one time or another has enjoyed that wonderful oriental delight,
01:03the poo-poo platter.
01:05Well today I'm going to go one step better and prepare Brack's special poo-poo poo platter.
01:12You notice there's an extra poo there.
01:15It's the extra poo that makes all the difference.
01:18I could have taken the easy road and did a poo platter,
01:22but who wants a platter with just one poo?
01:25I found that even the conventional two-poo platter leaves one a little bit...
01:30How should I say it?
01:31Unfulfilled.
01:33I trust you'll find that's not the case when you experience the thrill of an extra poo.
01:38Brack!
01:38What?
01:39There's no time left for your poo-poo platter.
01:42You mean my poo-poo poo platter.
01:44Whatever.
01:45Put your poo in the refrigerator and we'll try to work it into another show.
01:48Somebody's gonna steal my poo, I just know it.
01:51What if I make a sign that says,
01:53This is Brack's poo, don't touch it.
01:55That should do it.
01:58Zorak, do you know what I was just thinking?
02:00Eh, what did you say?
02:01I said, do you know what I was just thinking about?
02:05No, I don't.
02:06You know why?
02:07Because it's metaphysically impossible for me to know what you were thinking about.
02:14You might as well ask me what the monkeys in the zoo were thinking about.
02:18As a matter of fact, I was at the zoo the other day and I established telepathic communication with one of the monkeys.
02:25He was pondering the process of evolution.
02:27You know, the unfairness of it all.
02:29Either that or he was wishing he had a ham sandwich.
02:32When I was little, I used to go to the zoo and see this gorilla named Butch.
02:37All he did all day long was flick big boogers into people who were watching him.
02:43I used to say to myself, what a lie.
02:47I think that's when I decided to go into show business.
02:51Now how did you know the gorilla's name was Butch?
02:53There was this sign on the cage that said,
02:56Hello, my name is Butch.
02:57Please don't feed me and watch out for flying boogers.
03:00Sprague.
03:01What?
03:01You're an idiot!
03:02Well, what if I am?
03:04So, Zorak, would you like to know what I was just thinking about?
03:09No, but tell me anyways.
03:11I was just thinking that...
03:17Well, that's great.
03:18Now I forgot.
03:19Maybe you weren't thinking about anything.
03:21That wouldn't be so unusual.
03:23No, I distinctly remember that there was a thought buzzing around in my big old head.
03:28I thought I smelled something burning.
03:31What?
03:31I said, if you had a thought inside your head, it must have been pretty lonely.
03:38What do you mean?
03:39Never mind.
03:43How did I get on this show?
03:44You know, the last I heard, my gorilla friend Butch was playing in a band in Seattle.
03:50With the lights out, here's a booger!
03:53Here we are now, have a booger!
03:57And here I am, star of my own TV show.
04:03Oh, the river of life, how it rolls and flows.
04:08Where it stops, nobody knows.
04:12Kinda like this thing, don't it?
04:16Brother, what I wouldn't do for a ham sandwich right about now.
04:22Now, here's a tasty little nugget of joy from Zorak.
04:26I love the word snack.
04:28I love everything about it.
04:30I love the way it sounds, the way it smells, the way it tastes when you say it.
04:34Snack, snack.
04:37I won't say it again.
04:39I don't want to wear it out.
04:41Snack.
04:42There, I've said it again.
04:45Crispy cylinders of cheese, lighter than air.
04:48Potatoes, thinly sliced, fried, then dusted with artificial seasoning.
04:54Rows of slippery donuts and salted peanuts and caramel corn.
05:01Oh, how I love the caramel corn.
05:07I'm ramblin', ramblin', ramblin' high and low.
05:24I'm ramblin', ramble, ramble, ramblin', ramblin' everywhere I go.
05:33I ramble down to visit with Mary Jane.
05:37But she's up and moved away and changed her name.
05:41So I go ramblin'.
05:43Yeah, ramblin'.
05:46I'm just a ramblin' guy.
05:50I'm wanderin'.
05:52Yeah, wanderin', wanderin' here and there.
05:59And I'm wonderin'.
06:01Yeah, boy, I'm wanderin' if I pack me enough underwear.
06:08I wander down to visit with Agnes Rose.
06:12She slams the door so hard on me it breaks my nose.
06:16Yeah, I go wanderin'.
06:19My, oh, my.
06:21I'm just a wanderin' guy.
06:23Oh, yeah.
06:26I'm just a ramblin', wanderin' guy.
06:34Tip your waitstaff.
06:37Mailbag Day! Mailbag Day!
06:41Hey, everybody, it's Mailbag Day!
06:46Here's a letter from Garret Strickland, McDermott, oh, hoo-oh.
06:50Dear Zorak, I am not human.
06:52I am really an evil alien from the planet Zarblag.
06:56Zarblag. Zarblag.
06:59Who do I know on Zarblag?
07:01If we join forces, I bet we can rule the universe.
07:04Ha-ha-ha, meet me on Venus at 5 o'clock Monday or else.
07:09Eh, no can do.
07:11At 5 o'clock on Mondays, I'm in my I'm-okay-you-sting assertiveness class.
07:17I'm mean enough, I'm evil enough,
07:19and doggone it, people hate me.
07:24Here's a letter from Tim Shorkey, Burton, Michigan.
07:28Dear Space Ghost, I'd love to sit and chew the fat with you,
07:32but then you would probably think that I am a crazed psychotic fan out to kill you.
07:36Bye-bye.
07:38Well, there, Mr. Crazed Psychotic Fan Out to Kill Me,
07:41thanks so much for the little note.
07:43Call security.
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