My Sister Is Carrying Our Baby & It's Not 'Incest' | LOVE DON'T JUDGE
JOSEPH and his husband Nathan have been together for 13 years. The couple are getting ready to welcome their twins into the world very soon. Joseph’s sister, Breeana, is carrying their babies. The family are excited for the new arrivals, however, they have faced a lot of negativity on social media including homophobic comments and outrage from people wrongly assuming the process was incestuous. Joseph said: “Some people were so excited like ‘ah this is so perfect you’ll be able to see her every day’... Some people thought ‘this is sick’, ‘you guys are freaks’.” Nathan added: “And they’re all adults that are making these comments. They’re the bullies.” The couple’s friend - Kortney - donated her eggs and Breeana is their gestational surrogate. Joseph said: “We don’t want to focus on the negative and I don’t try to give them any attention. We’re going to rise above.” Joseph and Nathan own a high end salon where Breeana and Kortney also work. The four have a close bond and celebrate all their achievements and share their story to empower others. Joseph said: “There are no words to describe the amount of gratitude I feel towards Kortney and Breeana.”
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00:00This is Joseph. He fell in love with Nathan.
00:04We've been together for 13 years.
00:06Growing up in Texas and definitely even more so in a Mormon family,
00:11I felt a lot of, quote, Mormon guilt about my sexuality.
00:15Joseph's sister Brianna has always been supportive
00:18and is helping the couple start their own family.
00:21She would be our gestational carrier.
00:23But not everyone is supportive of this.
00:26This is sick, you guys are freaks, white trash.
00:29What you're doing is wrong to the core.
00:32Stella.
00:34No, don't go in the closet.
00:36My name is Joseph.
00:37This is my husband, Nathan, and we've been together for 13 years.
00:40Oh, you did so good on my highlight.
00:43Oh, yes.
00:44It's about time you got it right.
00:47Nothing? I get nothing for that comment?
00:49No, because I know it's not true.
00:51You do each other's hair?
00:53We do.
00:55So I'm a hairstylist.
00:57We literally own a very high-end salon with a boutique,
01:00design jewelry, style you from head to toe.
01:03The sky's the limit.
01:04And he orders me around. He's my boss.
01:07Do as I say.
01:09We met through mutual friends.
01:11I had a girlfriend that did hair and her brother worked with Nathan doing hair.
01:15About a year after I found out about Nathan, I ended up meeting him.
01:19I didn't go into it thinking I would ever date him.
01:22He wasn't necessarily my type.
01:25Once we realized that we had a good chemistry, friendship-wise,
01:29that's when the romance developed.
01:31Ow!
01:33And let me go back, when he says I wasn't his type,
01:35fabulous and funny and, you know, all the good things.
01:39We've been together for about 13 years.
01:42You're still happy and in love, it seems like.
01:44Oh, yeah.
01:47Since day one.
01:48Be more convincing, Nathan.
01:50I am convincing.
01:52Growing up in Texas and definitely even more so in a Mormon family,
01:57I felt a lot of, quote, Mormon guilt about my sexuality.
02:01I knew for sure since I was 14 that I was gay,
02:04but I was very scared of not only admitting to myself,
02:08but also disappointing my family or my parents.
02:11Thankfully, I had the support of my sister, Brianna.
02:14She was the first person that I told that I was gay.
02:17Brianna is not only my little sister, but she's my best friend
02:19and always been my bodyguard and protector.
02:21And fast forward to our adulthood, she was able to agree with me
02:25that she would be our gestational carrier and help us start our own family.
02:29I have always known that I want children.
02:32I was very clear with Nathan from the time we met
02:36that when I was 35, I was bringing babies home.
02:38When he turned about 33, he started like getting on that bandwagon
02:42and I was like freaking out.
02:44But of course, now that it's in process,
02:47like I can't imagine not, you know, doing it.
02:50He's going to be a great dad.
02:51And I knew whenever we dated that he had all the attributes I was looking for.
02:56And I mean, honestly, I've been raising a child for what, 13?
03:00Well, if this is what you did, then I'm scared.
03:02I'm scared because I'm a brat.
03:03Oh, look at you working hard here.
03:07Hold on.
03:10What do you do with this thing?
03:13Oh, my sister, Brianna.
03:15I'm not your sister.
03:16No. Looking at you.
03:18After discussing it,
03:19we decided that Brianna being the carrier was the most important thing to us
03:23because I knew that if something did happen,
03:27I could trust her.
03:28We had our friend Courtney, our best friend, that was going to donate her eggs.
03:33And then we would use both of our sperm.
03:34I've known the guys for about 12 years
03:38and I am the egg donor.
03:40And now you are the baby bed creator.
03:43Our first IVF journey was a little stressful.
03:48A little.
03:49That was a lot of stress.
03:51The drama before the first embryo transfer,
03:54they called me the morning of the transfer and told me, unfortunately, Joseph,
03:58the embryo of yours did not survive the thawing process
04:02and is no longer viable.
04:03So I was devastated.
04:05They ended up thawing out a second embryo.
04:07So then we did get pregnant with twin girls.
04:10And unfortunately, we made it seven weeks before Brianna had a miscarriage.
04:15And it was the most devastating thing that any of us have ever been through.
04:22We're moving forward.
04:23We've done a second embryo transfer after Brianna was able to recover.
04:27And thankfully, she agreed to do it again.
04:29And we're now pregnant with one boy, one girl.
04:32We are eight weeks or less away from the due date,
04:35although it looks like it's a mess.
04:37I don't have to worry because Courtney, aka Aunt Courtney,
04:41will handle all the things.
04:42So I am not alarmed.
04:45Look at this.
04:47So cute.
04:48I know I'm going to feel exponentially more love for these babies
04:51than I do any animal that I've ever had.
04:54And so I'm excited for my heart to grow.
04:56I'm a Grinch right now.
05:04Hello, Brianna.
05:05How are my babies?
05:07Large.
05:08Oh, yay.
05:11Hey, girl.
05:12How are you feeling today?
05:13I'm feeling very large.
05:16Yeah, so tight.
05:17I'm going to pop like a balloon.
05:18We still have like two months.
05:20Today is our 29th week appointment.
05:23So we're going to do an ultrasound to make sure that they're both living
05:27and swimming well.
05:28The thing that stresses me out the most about being a parent
05:31is just the amount of hate in the world.
05:33I cannot begin to express how disturbing it is that people feel the need
05:39to express their opinions of my life and my family
05:43when it has nothing to do with them and their life and their family.
05:46A lot of the reactions I get from people are mostly positive.
05:52But you'll still find that there's a lot of
05:55uneducated opinions out there because they don't really understand
06:00that it's not my DNA mixing with my brother's or even my brother-in-law's.
06:04I'm literally just housing them for nine months.
06:07Some people were so excited, like, this is so perfect.
06:10It's amazing.
06:10You're going to be able to see her every day.
06:12There are people that know how it works.
06:13And some people thought, this is sick.
06:15You guys are freaks.
06:17White trash from Arkansas.
06:19OMG, so sad for those babies.
06:22More mental issues ahead.
06:23Live your life.
06:24Don't bring innocent kids into it.
06:26You're mocking God.
06:28What you're doing is wrong to the core.
06:29God forgive you.
06:31Poor baby going to live in hell one day.
06:33This will be illegal again.
06:34This is sick.
06:36The whole situation is an abomination.
06:39So f***ed up.
06:41And they're all adults that are making these comments.
06:44They're the bullies.
06:46Like, and then they have children and they teach their children that.
06:50Shocking.
06:51I knew that people were going to judge us for being gay
06:53and automatically put us in a category of you shouldn't have kids.
06:59We don't want to focus on the negative and I don't try to give them any attention.
07:02We're going to rise above.
07:04All right.
07:04So they look good.
07:05Size is great.
07:06Your fluid's good.
07:08Your weight and blood pressure are doing good.
07:10So you're cruising.
07:12Good work, Oven.
07:14Thank you so much.
07:15You guys have a good afternoon.
07:16See you later.
07:17We are about to head over to the new salon.
07:19We're in transition moving into our newer, better, larger location.
07:25The appointment went really well.
07:27I didn't feel very uncomfortable.
07:29Like the doctor made me feel very safe.
07:32If I could describe our journey in one word,
07:38I mean, I would say, holy cow.
07:41It's important to live your life for yourself.
07:43You only get one shot, you know?
07:45And if you constantly live your life trying to please other people,
07:50you're constantly trying to be somebody for someone else,
07:54you're just going to have a lifetime of regret.
07:56There are so many haters and ugly people out there,
07:58but there's also a lot of loving people.
08:01And I feel like our story is going to empower people out there.
08:06I think that the beauty of my life is that it's perfectly imperfect.
08:12We're crazy.
08:13Mostly him.
08:14I'm the sane one.
08:16I don't know why I'm crying.
08:17I really am just extremely emotional about the whole process
08:20because it is my life's dream and it's getting true right now.
08:23There are no words to describe the amount of gratitude
08:26I feel toward Courtney and Brianna.
08:29My goal for this family is world domination.