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00:00:00 [ Music ]
00:00:03 >> Of a man who had a true dedication.
00:00:07 [ Applause ]
00:00:09 I'm honored still to be here today to remember Ted Strauss
00:00:14 and commemorate his generosity, strength,
00:00:19 and his loyalty to his family and friends.
00:00:23 [ Applause ]
00:00:24 We lost him tragically.
00:00:26 >> Excuse me.
00:00:27 >> Get me a water, sugar.
00:00:28 >> But he will never be forgotten,
00:00:31 as we rename the East Wing Ballroom
00:00:34 to Theodore Thomas Strauss.
00:00:36 >> I swear to God, if that guy touches my ass one more time,
00:00:39 I'm going to freak.
00:00:39 >> Which guy?
00:00:40 >> That guy, that old guy over there with the shakes.
00:00:42 >> Oh, the guy who invented the wheel?
00:00:44 I think he asked me to go to a Civil War reenactment later.
00:00:49 >> Are you kidding me?
00:00:49 Are you serious?
00:00:50 >> Yeah.
00:00:51 >> You're pretty excited about it.
00:00:52 >> Are you seeing these vegetables?
00:00:55 >> Oh, fuck Mr. Roo.
00:00:57 >> Get his own water.
00:00:58 [ Music ]
00:01:02 >> Get out of the way.
00:01:04 I'm CPR certified.
00:01:05 [ Music ]
00:01:07 >> Showtime.
00:01:09 [ Music ]
00:01:38 [ Music ]
00:01:47 [ Music ]
00:01:57 [ Music ]
00:02:07 [ Music ]
00:02:17 [ Music ]
00:02:32 [ Music ]
00:02:46 [ Music ]
00:02:56 [ Music ]
00:03:09 [ Music ]
00:03:23 >> It was mortifying, doctor.
00:03:25 >> Yes, I can imagine.
00:03:26 >> Well, I couldn't have-- he's been doing this for some time,
00:03:30 but never in front of me.
00:03:31 >> And that's why you called me now?
00:03:33 >> You crossed a line.
00:03:35 These are my friends.
00:03:37 These were my husband's friends.
00:03:39 >> I understand he passed away.
00:03:42 >> Three years ago.
00:03:43 Drowned himself.
00:03:45 It was terrible, but it's time to move on.
00:03:50 >> Were he and Paul close?
00:03:51 >> No. They never got along.
00:03:54 No one was really close to that man, not even me.
00:03:57 Look, I don't know what this is all about.
00:04:00 I just need you to make sure it doesn't happen again,
00:04:03 at least not near my club.
00:04:05 >> Of course. I'll do everything I can.
00:04:07 >> Thank you, doctor.
00:04:09 [ Music ]
00:04:13 >> I understand that's how you feel, but I--
00:04:16 yes, but if I could just give you my opinion--
00:04:18 [ Music ]
00:04:22 >> Yeah, yeah, okay.
00:04:26 Jen and Rob are going to have a kid.
00:04:30 [ Laughter ]
00:04:31 She's pregnant.
00:04:32 I just thought she was pregnant this whole time.
00:04:34 She's totally pregnant.
00:04:35 Totally.
00:04:37 [ Music ]
00:04:43 No, I'm not going there.
00:04:45 I'm not going there.
00:04:46 No, I'll go there.
00:04:48 >> Mr. Strauss, you can go on in.
00:04:50 >> Yeah.
00:04:50 >> Yeah, I'm still at work.
00:04:52 >> No, it doesn't matter.
00:04:54 [ Music ]
00:04:59 [ Knock ]
00:04:59 >> Hello?
00:05:01 >> Oh, shit.
00:05:02 Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.
00:05:04 >> I'm sorry.
00:05:05 >> Fuck.
00:05:06 Oh, you were supposed to-- fuck.
00:05:09 >> It's fine.
00:05:11 [ Door creaking ]
00:05:15 >> Mary?
00:05:16 >> Yes, Dr. Danzing?
00:05:18 >> I thought you said I didn't have any more appointments for the day.
00:05:21 >> I did.
00:05:22 >> You did.
00:05:25 >> I'm sorry, Dr. Danzing.
00:05:27 >> Go home for the day.
00:05:28 He is my last patient, correct?
00:05:32 >> What?
00:05:33 >> Go on.
00:05:36 >> I'm sorry, Dr. Danzing.
00:05:40 >> I told you.
00:05:42 It's fine.
00:05:43 >> Wow.
00:05:45 Fuck.
00:05:45 I really shouldn't be doing this.
00:05:48 >> Towel the door.
00:05:50 >> Yeah?
00:05:50 >> Yeah, towel the door.
00:05:52 [ Laughter ]
00:06:00 >> What the hell?
00:06:01 [ Laughter ]
00:06:11 >> Bad day?
00:06:13 >> Something like that.
00:06:14 I'm Greg.
00:06:15 >> Pluto.
00:06:16 >> Oh, like the planet?
00:06:17 >> No, like the Disney character.
00:06:19 >> Oh.
00:06:19 >> Yes, like the planet.
00:06:20 >> Oh. Is that short for something?
00:06:23 >> What would it be short for?
00:06:25 >> I don't know.
00:06:28 I guess I just never heard of someone being named after a planet before.
00:06:31 >> Well, I wasn't.
00:06:32 My name is Paul, and Pluto is the name of a Roman god that a planet was named after.
00:06:39 >> That you go by.
00:06:40 >> Right.
00:06:41 >> I spoke to your mother yesterday.
00:06:47 >> I would love to have a copy of that conversation.
00:06:50 >> Yeah, I didn't expect you to show up.
00:06:51 >> I'm here.
00:06:53 >> Right.
00:06:54 >> So go ahead, doc.
00:06:57 Fix me.
00:06:58 >> Well, what is it that you think needs fixing?
00:07:02 >> No idea.
00:07:03 You're the one who spoke to my mother.
00:07:04 >> She told me about your little incident at the country club.
00:07:09 >> Good times.
00:07:10 >> Yeah, yeah.
00:07:11 So you dress up like other people.
00:07:13 >> Sure.
00:07:14 >> You screw with everyone else?
00:07:16 >> Sort of.
00:07:17 >> Well, you lie to them about who you are and where you're from, what you do.
00:07:20 >> Well, it's a little more complicated than that.
00:07:23 >> Well, you're not afraid of getting caught or hurting someone?
00:07:26 >> Well, that's half the fun, Greg.
00:07:32 >> I'm not sure if I'm really stoned or just having trouble understanding.
00:07:38 Give me an example of a typical day.
00:07:42 >> Well, it's never the same.
00:07:43 >> Well, it's got to start from somewhere.
00:07:46 >> Okay.
00:07:51 I guess I would start with my hands.
00:07:55 From there I go wherever my imagination takes me.
00:07:59 But it wouldn't be any fun for me if you knew any more than that, Greg.
00:08:03 It's mine.
00:08:04 It's my drug.
00:08:06 It's my addiction.
00:08:07 It's the most fun I get to have all day.
00:08:10 But what's not to love about it?
00:08:12 I get to be anyone I want to be.
00:08:14 Whatever they would do, I do.
00:08:17 You wouldn't believe the people that I've met, the things that I've gotten to see.
00:08:22 That would never happen for Paul Strauss.
00:08:25 But for Pluto, for the people I've become, we get the excitement, the danger, the spontaneity.
00:08:35 My life is not monotonous.
00:08:38 My day is different every day.
00:08:42 Can you say the same?
00:08:45 [MUSIC]
00:09:10 >> I brought you a sandwich.
00:09:14 >> What kind?
00:09:16 >> I don't remember.
00:09:18 >> You don't remember what kind of sandwich you made for me?
00:09:19 >> I didn't make it.
00:09:21 >> Oh.
00:09:22 Who made it?
00:09:23 >> Rosie.
00:09:24 >> Oh.
00:09:27 Good.
00:09:28 >> What do you mean good?
00:09:30 >> She makes a better sandwich.
00:09:31 >> Than who?
00:09:33 >> Than you.
00:09:34 >> You know, you're a real asshole.
00:09:37 >> That's nice, Mother.
00:09:38 >> I hate it when you smoke.
00:09:41 >> I'm sorry to hear that.
00:09:42 >> Didn't you learn anything from your father?
00:09:44 >> Are you done?
00:09:48 >> Claire tells me you're still being rude to Ben.
00:09:51 >> I don't like him.
00:09:53 >> You hate everyone.
00:09:54 >> I don't hate everyone.
00:09:55 >> Name one person you don't hate.
00:09:57 >> Oscar.
00:09:59 >> Oscar's a cat.
00:10:00 He doesn't count.
00:10:00 >> I don't hate everyone.
00:10:02 Just a lot of people.
00:10:10 >> How are your sessions going?
00:10:12 >> They're fine.
00:10:18 >> Aren't you going to eat that sandwich?
00:10:20 >> I don't even know what kind it is.
00:10:26 >> Well, I got to run, sweetheart.
00:10:30 It's good to see you doing so well.
00:10:37 What's in that sandwich?
00:10:44 Damn you, Rosie.
00:10:47 She even cut the crust.
00:10:49 >> I told you.
00:10:50 She's good.
00:10:52 >> Yeah.
00:10:53 Yes, she is.
00:11:04 >> Meet Simon.
00:11:06 Simon is sleeping.
00:11:07 Simon is almost always sleeping because he suffers from a rare disorder known as Klein-Levin syndrome.
00:11:14 Some symptoms include excessive food intake, irritability, disorientation, hallucinations, and an abnormally uninhibited sex drive.
00:11:38 >> Hello?
00:11:41 >> Hey, you're awake.
00:11:43 >> I tried going to an audition this morning.
00:11:45 >> How'd that go?
00:11:46 >> I don't want to talk about it.
00:11:49 Where are you going?
00:11:51 >> Out with Claire and her boyfriend.
00:11:54 >> Douchebag.
00:11:54 >> That's the one.
00:11:56 >> He's a very nice boy, Pluto.
00:11:58 >> You think everyone's nice.
00:11:59 >> No, you just hate everyone.
00:12:02 >> That's what my mother said, too.
00:12:04 Pick one.
00:12:06 >> Don't scare this guy away.
00:12:07 >> Okay, I'll pick one.
00:12:10 >> This is unhealthy, Pluto.
00:12:12 >> My mother says hi, by the way.
00:12:18 >> Hi.
00:12:21 >> Oh, shit.
00:12:22 Give me a second.
00:12:25 I told you not to call at this time.
00:12:26 >> I'm sorry.
00:12:27 I had to talk to you.
00:12:29 >> This really isn't a good time.
00:12:30 If my wife --
00:12:30 >> I don't want to hear about your wife.
00:12:33 >> No, honey.
00:12:34 No, did you try --
00:12:35 >> Try the left drawer?
00:12:36 No, no, no, no, the other drawer.
00:12:38 >> No, hold on.
00:12:38 I'll be right there.
00:12:39 >> Look, I really have to go.
00:12:41 >> I need to see you again.
00:12:42 >> I don't know if that's possible.
00:12:43 >> Make it possible.
00:12:44 >> Look, I have to go.
00:12:45 Don't call this number again.
00:12:46 >> Wait, I really need to --
00:12:48 >> Who was that?
00:12:49 >> Some lady.
00:12:51 >> You sleep with her?
00:12:52 >> Maybe.
00:12:53 >> She thinks you're married.
00:12:56 >> Maybe.
00:12:57 >> That's real nice, Pluto.
00:12:59 >> What?
00:13:00 >> You're cheating.
00:13:01 >> On who?
00:13:01 I don't have a wife.
00:13:02 >> But she thinks you do.
00:13:03 >> Right, so really, she is the cheater.
00:13:07 >> Is she married?
00:13:08 >> Not that I know of.
00:13:10 Fuck, I hope not.
00:13:11 >> Seriously, you need to come up with a new hobby.
00:13:14 >> Why?
00:13:14 This is so much fun.
00:13:16 Plus, I get late sometimes.
00:13:17 That does not happen for Pluto.
00:13:19 >> Could, you know, if you act like a normal human being and talk to a woman as, I don't know, yourself.
00:13:24 >> Nah, I gave that up a long time ago.
00:13:26 Probably around the same time that Olivia Whitfield rejected me.
00:13:29 >> Again with this girl.
00:13:31 [ Music ]
00:13:34 >> Olivia Whitfield.
00:13:36 [ Music ]
00:13:40 >> Oh, you remember her.
00:13:42 From the third grade to the sixth grade, we were in love.
00:13:46 We probably would have been together forever if her father didn't get a job across the country and move her away from me.
00:13:53 >> That is not how it happened at all.
00:13:57 >> Okay, I was not that gay.
00:13:59 >> A little less gay.
00:14:00 >> What?
00:14:01 >> Yeah, a little, a little less.
00:14:04 That's not how it happened at all.
00:14:07 >> That's better.
00:14:09 We both know she had a crush on me.
00:14:12 She rejected you.
00:14:14 Many times.
00:14:16 You cried on my shoulder.
00:14:18 >> It's okay, little buddy.
00:14:20 [ Music ]
00:14:23 [ Applause ]
00:14:31 >> You want to come along tonight?
00:14:33 >> So you make Claire's boyfriend cry again?
00:14:35 I'll pass.
00:14:36 >> It's great.
00:14:38 >> Really?
00:14:38 >> Really, really.
00:14:40 >> Do you like the style?
00:14:41 I don't know.
00:14:41 I'm nervous about the style.
00:14:43 It's different, you know?
00:14:44 >> The style's great, baby.
00:14:46 >> You don't think it's different?
00:14:47 >> It's very different.
00:14:49 >> Yeah, but like great different, right?
00:14:50 Not like this sucks different?
00:14:52 >> Like awesome different.
00:14:56 >> Awesome different.
00:14:57 >> I'm proud of you.
00:14:58 >> I'm just so glad it's done.
00:15:00 >> Totally.
00:15:02 >> Do you think your brother might do it?
00:15:03 >> What?
00:15:04 >> I don't know.
00:15:04 I think he'd be really great.
00:15:06 I know he probably hasn't acted in an actual play since like childhood,
00:15:10 but I based a lot of the lead off of him.
00:15:12 And I don't know.
00:15:13 I think that he would get it more than anybody else.
00:15:17 >> We're thinking of the same person, right?
00:15:18 >> Yeah. You think he'd do it?
00:15:21 >> He doesn't know the first thing about acting, Ben.
00:15:23 >> How is it any different than what he's doing right now?
00:15:26 >> I don't know.
00:15:27 >> Well, I should be able to at least ask him.
00:15:29 I mean, I'm going to be his brother-in-law eventually.
00:15:33 What? Am I wrong?
00:15:34 >> No.
00:15:38 >> No, I mean, I know he hates me.
00:15:41 >> He doesn't hate you.
00:15:43 He's like that with everyone.
00:15:44 >> Claire, he hates me.
00:15:46 >> Why do you say that?
00:15:47 >> He calls me a douchebag to my face.
00:15:50 >> Well, maybe he's just joking.
00:15:53 >> Memorial Day weekend in the park, remember when he pretended to be retarded?
00:15:58 >> Douchebag, douchebag, douchebag, douchebag, douchebag, douchebag, douchebag.
00:16:05 >> It's not funny.
00:16:05 I got beat up by two middle-aged women.
00:16:08 >> That was really awful and, come to think of it, offensive.
00:16:11 >> Yeah, and not to mention, I don't know, wrong?
00:16:15 >> Well, at least he paid for the hospital bills.
00:16:16 >> No, your family paid for them.
00:16:18 They did. He didn't pay for anything.
00:16:21 Just because you have money doesn't mean you can do whatever you want.
00:16:23 >> No, I don't.
00:16:24 >> I just don't know what he has against me.
00:16:26 I'm always so nice to him.
00:16:27 >> I know, you're so good, baby.
00:16:29 >> Really?
00:16:30 >> Really, really.
00:16:32 >> I love you.
00:16:33 >> I love you, too.
00:16:35 >> I just really hope he's not retarded again tonight.
00:16:38 >> Douchebag, douchebag, douchebag, douchebag, douchebag, douchebag.
00:16:43 >> Yeah, me too.
00:16:45 >> Let proud poets preach, let lost lovers lie,
00:16:48 just let me reside in your dreams tonight.
00:16:56 [ Applause ]
00:16:58 [ Music ]
00:17:11 >> What did you just tell that kid?
00:17:13 >> That I'm going to sign his band to my music agency.
00:17:17 >> But you don't have a music agency.
00:17:20 >> Yes, Ben, that's right.
00:17:21 I do not actually have a music agency.
00:17:24 >> Why did you do that?
00:17:25 >> I'm just having a little fun.
00:17:26 >> At what expense?
00:17:27 >> I didn't hurt anyone.
00:17:29 >> Those kids think that something really great just happened to them.
00:17:32 >> Why is that a bad thing?
00:17:33 >> Because it's a lie, because nothing happened to them.
00:17:35 >> Sure it did.
00:17:37 >> What happened?
00:17:37 They're going to be in the same place tomorrow that they are today.
00:17:40 >> Okay, but tonight they'll celebrate.
00:17:43 Tonight they will feel great.
00:17:45 >> Yeah, but what about tomorrow?
00:17:47 >> I won't be here tomorrow.
00:17:49 >> I think that's pretty selfish, Pluto.
00:17:51 >> I disagree.
00:17:51 >> How?
00:17:53 >> Well, Ben, it's actually not that hard.
00:17:54 All I do is take the previous statement and negate it,
00:17:57 and therefore I've not agreed with it, i.e. disagree.
00:18:01 >> Don't be an asshole.
00:18:02 >> That's what mom said too.
00:18:03 >> How can you possibly think that that's not selfish?
00:18:06 >> Well, A, because this has nothing to do with me, and B, because, okay,
00:18:11 they're not gaining anything, but they're not losing anything either.
00:18:14 Because of me, tonight their night will be a little bit better.
00:18:18 >> That's retarded.
00:18:19 >> That is not a very nice word, Ben.
00:18:21 I thought we learned that this summer.
00:18:23 >> Pluto, stop.
00:18:24 >> Why do you hang out with this guy?
00:18:25 >> Paul.
00:18:26 >> Does this work out your daddy issues?
00:18:30 >> I gotta go.
00:18:31 >> More people to lie to.
00:18:32 >> No, silly.
00:18:34 More people to excite.
00:18:40 >> I told you, he hates me.
00:18:43 [ Music ]
00:19:03 >> Wake up.
00:19:04 >> What?
00:19:05 >> Wake up, Simon.
00:19:06 Wake up. I need your help.
00:19:07 >> I'm sleeping.
00:19:08 >> It's 2 o'clock in the afternoon, Simon.
00:19:10 I need your help.
00:19:11 >> It's a disease, Pluto.
00:19:12 If I could wake up, I would.
00:19:14 >> You can.
00:19:14 You can for me.
00:19:15 Now, get up.
00:19:16 >> What is it?
00:19:18 I'm going back to sleep.
00:19:19 >> No, no, no, no, no.
00:19:20 Get up. This is important.
00:19:21 This is serious.
00:19:24 Seventh grade talent show.
00:19:25 You begged me for weeks to sing "Bosom Buddies" from the musical "Mane."
00:19:29 It's a female duet, Simon, but I did it.
00:19:32 I did it because you begged.
00:19:34 This is me begging.
00:19:37 >> Okay.
00:19:39 What is it?
00:19:41 >> I saw her today.
00:19:42 >> Who?
00:19:42 >> Olivia.
00:19:44 >> Well, how did you know it was her?
00:19:45 >> She looked exactly the same.
00:19:48 >> Creepy.
00:19:50 >> She's age 15 years, Simon.
00:19:52 I just knew it was her.
00:19:54 >> Did you talk to her?
00:19:55 >> Not exactly.
00:19:57 >> Oh, my God.
00:19:58 You followed her.
00:19:59 >> I just -- I walked in the same direction.
00:20:02 But she went to the park, to my spot in the park.
00:20:05 What are the chances?
00:20:10 >> I'll be here tomorrow.
00:20:11 I'm here, like, every day.
00:20:14 >> Listen, I need to come up with the best person I've ever come up with.
00:20:18 The sexiest, most appealing guy you can think of.
00:20:21 >> What?
00:20:22 She's not blind, Pluto.
00:20:24 I mean, if she saw you, she's going to know who you are.
00:20:27 >> Oh, my God.
00:20:29 She's not blind, right?
00:20:31 >> No, she didn't see me.
00:20:32 I hit her.
00:20:33 >> Maybe you're getting a little too excited about this.
00:20:35 She might recognize you when she does see you.
00:20:37 And what if she has a boyfriend?
00:20:39 >> I'll cross that bridge when I get there.
00:20:41 >> Okay.
00:20:42 Well, let's say you do impress this girl.
00:20:44 Then what?
00:20:46 If she's so special, wouldn't you want to impress her as yourself?
00:20:49 >> What's impressive about me?
00:20:51 I'm just like everybody else, okay?
00:20:53 Everyone else isn't impressive.
00:20:55 I need to be better than everyone else.
00:20:57 What are women like?
00:20:59 >> They're boyfriends.
00:21:00 >> You don't know if she's a boyfriend.
00:21:02 >> You don't know if she has a boyfriend.
00:21:04 >> Pluto.
00:21:05 >> Please.
00:21:07 >> I love a cute European guy.
00:21:09 >> Okay.
00:21:10 Hey, yeah, yeah, that's good.
00:21:12 >> What languages have you studied?
00:21:13 >> My Latin is impeccable.
00:21:15 >> Pluto.
00:21:16 >> Any ideas?
00:21:18 >> I dated a French guy before.
00:21:20 He was adorable.
00:21:22 >> Oh, yeah?
00:21:23 >> Oh, my God, yes.
00:21:25 So hot.
00:21:26 I mean, I couldn't tell you half the shit he said to me, but it didn't matter.
00:21:30 There's just something about that cute little accent.
00:21:33 I should really call him.
00:21:35 >> What was his name?
00:21:37 >> Sebastian.
00:21:39 >> Oh, I like that.
00:21:41 >> Are you going to see this girl again?
00:21:43 >> Definitely.
00:21:44 >> Well, tell her I said, "Hey, girl."
00:21:46 >> I'm going to go practice this accent.
00:21:47 >> Great, fine, whatever.
00:21:49 Let me know how it works out.
00:21:52 And when I get up, I'm going to find that tape from the talent show and put it on YouTube.
00:21:56 >> I'll kill you.
00:21:58 >> We'll always be bosom buddies.
00:22:02 Friends, sisters, and pals.
00:22:06 We'll always be buddies.
00:22:11 [ Music ]
00:22:27 >> She didn't show up.
00:22:29 I was sure she would.
00:22:31 I wasn't going back.
00:22:32 That was it.
00:22:33 She lost her chance.
00:22:34 >> Had you planned on meeting?
00:22:35 >> No, no, we never actually talked about it or anything, but, you know, I expected her there.
00:22:40 And then I got angry and sad, and I thought about doing some really awful things.
00:22:45 >> A five, six, seven, eight.
00:22:47 [ Music ]
00:22:53 >> When I ask for a right batma and a double, I better get a right batma and a double.
00:22:59 What is this, people?
00:23:00 Community theater?
00:23:01 >> Now, as your guidance counselor, I would recommend taking my advice.
00:23:07 Have you considered clown college?
00:23:10 [ Music ]
00:23:12 >> Wait, you robbed someone?
00:23:14 >> No, Greg, I didn't do any of those things.
00:23:16 What kind of person do you think I am?
00:23:18 >> I'm sorry.
00:23:19 >> It's all right.
00:23:20 >> No, that was so rude of me.
00:23:21 I really shouldn't have done that.
00:23:22 >> I appreciate the concern.
00:23:23 And the wallet saves us a lot of time.
00:23:25 >> Yeah, having to call and cancel the credit cards.
00:23:27 >> And getting a new license at the DMV is the worst.
00:23:29 >> The worst.
00:23:31 >> I don't even think I have much money in here.
00:23:33 Nope, $6.
00:23:34 Look at that.
00:23:35 >> Six bucks.
00:23:36 >> A waste of everyone's time in the end.
00:23:37 I don't even have a gun.
00:23:38 [ Laughter ]
00:23:44 >> Oh, well, nice to have met you guys.
00:23:45 >> Yeah, you too.
00:23:46 Hey, good luck with Olivia.
00:23:47 >> Yeah, I hope she shows up the next time you go looking for her.
00:23:49 >> Thanks.
00:23:50 You know, I'm really just frustrated.
00:23:51 I really --
00:23:52 >> I thought you said you didn't do that.
00:23:54 >> I didn't.
00:23:55 I went back to Wafer the next day after all.
00:23:57 [ Music ]
00:23:59 >> Excuse me, sir.
00:24:00 Could I just take a moment of your time?
00:24:02 >> Hold on.
00:24:03 >> Oh, I'm sorry.
00:24:04 Do you not speak English?
00:24:05 >> Oui.
00:24:06 >> Oh, good, because the first thing you said to me was in French, and that was in French.
00:24:11 I'm sorry.
00:24:12 Do you speak English?
00:24:13 >> Yes.
00:24:14 >> Oh, good.
00:24:15 Oui, oui.
00:24:16 Well, could I just take one minute of your time?
00:24:19 >> Can we sit?
00:24:20 >> Sit?
00:24:21 >> I am in no rush.
00:24:22 Are you?
00:24:23 >> No, I guess not.
00:24:25 >> So let's sit, please, s'il vous plaît.
00:24:29 >> Hi, I'm Olivia.
00:24:31 >> Sebastian.
00:24:32 >> Oh, what a nice name.
00:24:34 Nobody here has nice names like that anymore.
00:24:36 I mean, everything's so typical and bland.
00:24:39 I was in Europe for a year for study abroad in college.
00:24:42 Everyone there had such great names.
00:24:44 >> Did you visit France?
00:24:45 >> Yeah, I was in Paris for like a week.
00:24:48 It was amazing.
00:24:49 >> How is your French?
00:24:50 >> Oh, terrible.
00:24:51 I can't speak a word of it.
00:24:53 Oh, I totally forgot why we were here.
00:24:56 I'm with RHM.
00:24:58 We're a human rights group.
00:24:59 We focus mainly on financially tripled families like me.
00:25:02 >> I am afraid I do not have much money to help you.
00:25:07 >> Oh, no, that's okay.
00:25:09 Any compensation can help, really.
00:25:11 If you just give me your info, I can send you details.
00:25:13 You can send in a check of however much you want.
00:25:15 If you're just being nice to me, that's okay, too.
00:25:19 But it's really a great program to learn about.
00:25:23 Why don't you just give me your info, and you can decide for yourself.
00:25:28 >> How about this?
00:25:30 How about we sit right here, and you tell me everything that I need to know?
00:25:38 >> Well, I kind of have to go around a little more.
00:25:42 I'm supposed to cover this whole area by a certain hour.
00:25:45 >> Oh.
00:25:47 >> But I'll be here tomorrow.
00:25:49 Will you be around?
00:25:51 >> I will be right here.
00:25:55 >> You know, something about you looks so familiar.
00:25:57 I don't know, just something about your face.
00:25:59 You remind me of someone or something.
00:26:02 Do you get that a lot?
00:26:03 >> Not usually.
00:26:05 >> Maybe we met in Paris.
00:26:07 >> Maybe it's destiny.
00:26:08 >> Whoa, I don't know about that.
00:26:10 >> Am I using the wrong word?
00:26:13 >> No, it's just a little dramatic.
00:26:23 Oh, no, no, I hate the taste.
00:26:25 But, you know, you go ahead.
00:26:28 I'll see you tomorrow, Sebastian.
00:26:30 >> Au revoir, Olivia.
00:26:32 >> Au revoir.
00:26:37 >> Oh, my God.
00:26:49 >> Well, hello there, sir.
00:26:50 My name is Steve.
00:26:51 I'm going to go right ahead and be your server today, okay?
00:26:54 We're going to kick off with the specials.
00:26:55 We have the soup of the day, the tomato bisque.
00:26:57 Our fish of the day is the black and salmon.
00:26:59 >> Yeah, I'm not going to be ordering any of that shit.
00:27:00 Can you just go get me a coffee?
00:27:01 Black?
00:27:02 Thanks.
00:27:03 I'm going to be meeting someone any minute.
00:27:05 >> Oh, okay.
00:27:06 >> Yeah, I'll get that while you're waiting.
00:27:08 >> Thanks.
00:27:14 >> Excuse me, sir.
00:27:15 Would you mind if I joined you for a few moments?
00:27:20 >> Yeah, I guess for a minute.
00:27:22 >> Thank you, thank you, thank you.
00:27:23 I just -- I hate sitting alone.
00:27:26 >> Why, hello there, madam.
00:27:29 How are you today?
00:27:30 >> I'm fine, thank you.
00:27:32 >> Coffee, sir.
00:27:33 Would you like to eat today's specials?
00:27:34 >> No, no, no, she's not going to stay.
00:27:35 >> Yes, I would love to.
00:27:37 >> Oh, would you?
00:27:38 That's great.
00:27:39 All right, then, today we have the soup of the day, the tomato bisque.
00:27:42 Very good soup.
00:27:43 Very good, banging.
00:27:44 Bisque, banging, okay?
00:27:46 The fish of the day is the black and salmon.
00:27:48 We went right ahead and blackened that up for you.
00:27:50 And that's going to about conclude the specials for today.
00:27:54 All right?
00:27:55 >> Yes.
00:27:56 >> Oh, please, you don't have to.
00:27:57 Thank you, please, thank you.
00:27:58 >> That was a wonderful presentation.
00:28:01 >> Thank you.
00:28:03 >> I will have a glass of water.
00:28:06 >> Of course.
00:28:07 [ Music ]
00:28:19 >> This is my grandson, Stuart.
00:28:24 Isn't he adorable?
00:28:26 >> He's great.
00:28:29 >> Yes, he's adorable.
00:28:34 May I ask you something?
00:28:38 >> Sure.
00:28:39 >> A sweet old lady comes and asks you for some company, and you won't even give her the time of day.
00:28:45 Why is that?
00:28:47 >> Look, I'm sorry, I'm just -- I'm waiting here for someone, and it's really important.
00:28:49 >> This is why you don't deserve my sister.
00:28:53 >> What?
00:28:54 >> You heard me, you little shit.
00:28:56 >> Pluto?
00:28:57 >> You see, she can do a lot better than you.
00:29:00 To be frank, I fucking hate you.
00:29:05 I think that you are a real douchebag, Ben.
00:29:10 >> Who the fuck are you?
00:29:11 You're dressed up like an old woman.
00:29:13 You're sick, man.
00:29:14 >> You're saying pretty awful things to an old lady in a public place.
00:29:17 >> You are not a fucking old lady.
00:29:20 Hey, everyone, look at this asshole.
00:29:22 This is not an old lady.
00:29:24 This is a man dressed up in an old lady suit.
00:29:27 >> I can't believe how retarded I am.
00:29:29 You're clearly wearing a mask.
00:29:31 >> Is everything okay?
00:29:32 >> Yes, Steve, yes, yes.
00:29:34 He's my son.
00:29:35 He's just on a short break from the Levenson Institute down the road.
00:29:40 >> Take it easy, sir.
00:29:41 >> He's lying to you.
00:29:42 >> If you don't calm down, I'm going to have to go right ahead and ask you to leave.
00:29:45 >> Oh, eat me, Steve.
00:29:47 >> Oh, my heavens.
00:29:49 >> Steve, Steve, thank you, thank you for your help.
00:29:51 I have a very kind of you, very kind.
00:29:54 >> Thank you.
00:29:55 >> My sister told me that you wanted to ask me to be in your play.
00:30:09 Ben, I would be in your fucking play if Shakespeare himself helped you write it.
00:30:15 >> Douchebag.
00:30:18 [music]
00:30:20 >> I used to work at a cafe last summer.
00:30:44 God, it was so awful.
00:30:46 >> Why?
00:30:47 >> I don't know.
00:30:48 Shitty pay, shitty boss.
00:30:50 You know, I remember running home literally every time I left work.
00:30:56 I mean, not the whole way.
00:30:58 I would walk because it was pretty close.
00:31:00 But as soon as I got around the corner to my house, I would just take off.
00:31:03 >> Like when you have to go to the bathroom, the toilet?
00:31:08 >> Yeah, exactly.
00:31:10 Oh, that was my favorite part of the day, just the running.
00:31:14 I felt like a little kid again, you know?
00:31:17 I mean, how often is it that you see grown adults running?
00:31:21 >> Nonsense.
00:31:22 >> Okay, that doesn't count.
00:31:25 No, it's usually when it's something bad or like something's wrong.
00:31:29 But that's not how it was at all.
00:31:32 Ask me something.
00:31:37 Ask me anything.
00:31:39 >> Anything?
00:31:40 >> Yeah, go for it.
00:31:42 [music]
00:31:45 >> What do you want to do with your life?
00:31:49 >> That's a loaded question.
00:31:51 >> You said anything.
00:31:52 It seems like an important thing to know about a person.
00:31:58 >> Well, I guess I don't really know.
00:32:01 >> Me either.
00:32:02 >> Really?
00:32:04 >> Really, really.
00:32:06 >> Well, do you think that's a bad thing?
00:32:09 >> I think it is what it is.
00:32:12 But at least you have something that you are passionate about,
00:32:15 something that you believe in.
00:32:19 >> I guess.
00:32:20 I mean, honestly, it's just something to help pass the time.
00:32:22 My heart's not in it.
00:32:24 I mean, I feel good.
00:32:25 I'm legitimately helping people, but I don't know.
00:32:29 It's not enough.
00:32:30 I'm lonely here, you know?
00:32:32 And you wouldn't think it would be in this city, but it is.
00:32:36 >> That's probably why I'm babbling to a complete stranger.
00:32:39 >> Hey, not a complete stranger.
00:32:41 New friend.
00:32:43 >> You know this can only end badly, right?
00:32:45 >> Yeah, but it'll be a great story.
00:32:48 >> But you came in here so excited, so energetic.
00:32:51 It's great to hear someone talk about another person like that.
00:32:54 It's infectious.
00:32:56 So now I'm living vicariously through you, Pluto.
00:33:00 Why do you want to screw this up?
00:33:02 >> Well, it's too late now, don't you think?
00:33:04 >> No, I don't.
00:33:05 >> I mean, you told her now maybe you could pass it off as a joke of one or two-time thing, you know, kind of weird, sure.
00:33:11 But women love to laugh.
00:33:14 >> At least most women do.
00:33:16 It'll give her a good laugh.
00:33:18 >> No, she wouldn't buy that.
00:33:20 I'll just pretend as long as I can.
00:33:22 >> Are you afraid of having something real?
00:33:24 >> What?
00:33:26 >> Something real between two people.
00:33:28 >> No.
00:33:30 >> You go around hiding behind these people you make up, hmm?
00:33:33 >> You know, why is it fair for you to ask someone to care for someone who doesn't even care about himself?
00:33:37 >> Are you married, Greg?
00:33:39 >> Uh, yeah.
00:33:41 Yes, I am.
00:33:43 >> And how's that work out for you?
00:33:45 >> It's fine.
00:33:47 Why do you ask?
00:33:49 >> Well, the first time I came in here, you were getting high in your office.
00:33:53 You don't really strike me as the pothead type, so I figure something must be stressing you out.
00:33:58 Not getting laid?
00:34:01 >> I'm not getting laid.
00:34:03 I'm not doing any of your business, Paul.
00:34:05 >> Pluto.
00:34:07 >> Right, Pluto.
00:34:09 Why did you get so defensive when I asked you a question?
00:34:11 >> Why did you get so defensive when I brought up your wife?
00:34:13 >> That's enough talk about my wife.
00:34:15 >> Okay.
00:34:17 I'm sorry.
00:34:19 You don't need to get all goodwill hunting on me.
00:34:21 >> It's fine.
00:34:23 >> So, um...
00:34:25 So I've been dreaming in cartoon.
00:34:27 >> What?
00:34:29 >> Actually, it sounds kind of cool.
00:34:31 Are you the cartoon, or is the entire dream a cartoon?
00:34:34 >> The whole thing.
00:34:36 I'm not always me, too.
00:34:38 I mean, I'm always there, but it's weird.
00:34:40 I don't even really remember it often, but last night's was pretty vivid.
00:34:44 >> Oh, yeah?
00:34:46 >> Yeah, kind of depressing, really.
00:34:48 You see, there was no color.
00:34:50 It was all in black and white.
00:34:52 And I was this little mouse living in one of those semicircle holes in the family's kitchen that you only actually see in cartoons.
00:34:57 And all around the room, there were these random vases and containers.
00:35:00 And every so often, this guy would drop something inside the containers.
00:35:04 But I could never see his face.
00:35:06 It was always covered like that Magritte painting with the apple.
00:35:09 But the thing that he dropped inside, I know that I want it.
00:35:13 I need it.
00:35:15 So I decide to climb to the tallest and highest one of these containers because I'm going to get it.
00:35:20 But when I finally get to the top, I fall in.
00:35:23 Suddenly, I'm surrounded by coins, and every time I try to get out, the man with the covered face hits me on top of the head with another one.
00:35:30 So I lay there.
00:35:32 Alone.
00:35:34 Have you ever died in a dream, Greg?
00:35:36 It's an awful thing.
00:35:38 That's what this felt like.
00:35:41 Suddenly, I'm in this grocery store, and the man with the covered face is counting his change in one of those coin counting machines.
00:35:48 And I fall out.
00:35:50 A dead mouse in a pool of money.
00:35:55 And then I woke up.
00:35:57 But, um, I don't take dreams too seriously.
00:36:00 Well, what do you think it means?
00:36:03 Nothing.
00:36:05 I think it's a random assortment of ideas and thoughts meshed together in my head.
00:36:08 Well, you brought it up for a reason.
00:36:15 Poor mouse never even had a chance.
00:36:18 I'm sorry, Mrs. Danzing.
00:36:20 I...
00:36:22 Okay.
00:36:23 Um...
00:36:24 No, I...
00:36:26 Mm-hmm.
00:36:28 There's no need to curse, Mrs. Danzing.
00:36:32 I'm going to transfer you right now.
00:36:38 Mary was, um...
00:36:39 Was that Dr. Danzing's wife?
00:36:42 I don't...
00:36:44 I don't really think I'm supposed to share that sort of information.
00:36:47 Oh, Mary, it's not a big deal.
00:36:49 We'll keep it between us.
00:36:52 Yeah, yeah, that was her.
00:36:54 Yeah.
00:36:55 And she's... she's... she's a bitch.
00:36:57 She's a huge bitch.
00:37:00 You know, she's just...
00:37:01 You look at her and you can tell she's a mean person.
00:37:03 She probably stabs her friends in the back.
00:37:05 Right?
00:37:06 One of those bitches.
00:37:07 You know what I'm talking about, right?
00:37:09 She's one of those bitches that all the other bitches love to talk about,
00:37:12 but then when she comes around, they clam up
00:37:14 because they only wish they could be as bitchy as she is.
00:37:17 She probably has some big bitch trophy at home that reads,
00:37:19 "I'm the world's biggest bitch,
00:37:21 and if you argue with me or blink or breathe or do anything,
00:37:24 I will shove this bitch trophy up your ass!"
00:37:27 That kind of bitch, yeah.
00:37:32 Are you okay?
00:37:34 I'm fine.
00:37:37 I have a picture of her
00:37:40 from last Christmas party here.
00:37:42 Judge for yourself.
00:37:44 Pretty, right?
00:37:45 But a huge bitch.
00:37:48 Well, that's a coincidence.
00:37:50 What is?
00:37:51 Oh, no, I can see right here in this picture.
00:37:54 What a bitch.
00:37:55 That's right.
00:37:59 How is that a coincidence?
00:38:01 I'll see you next week, Mary.
00:38:02 Okay, honey.
00:38:04 Stupid bitch.
00:38:06 Bitch.
00:38:09 Okay.
00:38:12 [soft music]
00:38:15 ♪ ♪
00:38:25 ♪ Oh, goodbye my Coney Island baby ♪
00:38:30 ♪ Farewell my own true love ♪
00:38:33 ♪ True love, my love ♪
00:38:34 ♪ I'm gonna go away and leave you ♪
00:38:38 ♪ Never to see you any ♪
00:38:40 ♪ Never gonna see you any ♪
00:38:42 ♪ I'm gonna sail upon that fairy boat ♪
00:38:44 You have to be fucking kidding me.
00:38:45 Oh, no.
00:38:46 Pluto!
00:38:47 ♪ I can't return again ♪
00:38:49 ♪ So goodbye my ever so long-for-ever ♪
00:38:51 Come on, come on, let's go.
00:38:52 ♪ Goodbye my Coney Island ♪
00:38:55 ♪ Goodbye my Coney Island ♪
00:38:57 ♪ Goodbye my Coney Island baby ♪
00:38:59 ♪ Goodbye my Coney Island baby ♪
00:39:05 I don't suppose you want to smoke?
00:39:07 Your mother is pretty pissed off.
00:39:09 Okay.
00:39:10 Do you not care at all?
00:39:11 I didn't do anything wrong.
00:39:13 This isn't normal, Pluto.
00:39:14 Do you realize that?
00:39:15 What you're doing is not something that people do every day.
00:39:18 It is out of the ordinary.
00:39:20 It is abnormal.
00:39:21 And your mom is really upset.
00:39:23 She doesn't like this at all.
00:39:25 You know she could cut off your funds.
00:39:27 No, she can't.
00:39:28 Yes, she can.
00:39:29 Your father's money is in her name.
00:39:30 We just talked about it.
00:39:31 I don't see what the big deal is.
00:39:32 Because it's not healthy, Pluto.
00:39:34 You can't lie to people the way you do.
00:39:37 What would you do?
00:39:39 What?
00:39:40 What would you do if you had no more money?
00:39:42 You couldn't afford that expensive apartment of yours.
00:39:44 You know, you'd have to get a job.
00:39:46 Ooh, you'd have to pay for your rent, your health insurance, your cell phone bill.
00:39:50 You'd need to buy food.
00:39:51 Okay, I got it.
00:39:52 Look, I'm going to prescribe you something.
00:40:02 I don't need it.
00:40:03 It's benzodiazepine, a generic form of Xanax.
00:40:07 It's often used to treat people with tension, anxiety, and depression.
00:40:13 I'm not crazy.
00:40:15 It's pretty strong.
00:40:18 People get hooked on it pretty easily, so only take it when you feel like doing what you do.
00:40:23 Is this because I brought up your wife?
00:40:25 Look, man, I meant no harm, okay?
00:40:27 I can't force you to take this, but it's my medical recommendation.
00:40:32 [sad music]
00:40:34 I'm disappointed in you, Greg.
00:40:37 Oh, fuck.
00:40:50 What the hell, man?
00:40:56 Did you get some cash?
00:40:58 No, I'm sleeping.
00:41:01 What else is new?
00:41:03 What's your problem?
00:41:05 We're back.
00:41:07 What did I fucking say?
00:41:12 I'm sorry.
00:41:13 Do you have problems following simple directions?
00:41:15 I said one fucking person.
00:41:16 I couldn't leave him in my parents' house alone.
00:41:18 I'm sorry.
00:41:19 For five fucking minutes, he couldn't be alone.
00:41:21 His mom doesn't like me, man.
00:41:23 I wonder why.
00:41:24 What's your problem?
00:41:25 You're my fucking problem, asshole.
00:41:27 Do you want this shit or not?
00:41:29 Yeah, yeah, yeah, we want it.
00:41:31 A hundred bucks.
00:41:32 That's ridiculous.
00:41:33 Get the fuck out of my car.
00:41:34 Dude.
00:41:35 Get the fuck out now.
00:41:36 No, no, here, here, here, here.
00:41:38 It's in the dashboard.
00:41:39 Put the shit in there, too.
00:41:41 Now get the fuck out of my car.
00:41:48 [Music]
00:41:51 [Music]
00:41:54 [Music]
00:41:57 [Music]
00:42:00 [Music]
00:42:03 [Music]
00:42:06 [Music]
00:42:09 [Music]
00:42:12 [Music]
00:42:15 [Music]
00:42:17 [Music]
00:42:20 [Music]
00:42:23 [Music]
00:42:26 [Music]
00:42:29 [Music]
00:42:32 [Music]
00:42:35 [Music]
00:42:38 [Music]
00:42:42 [MUSIC]
00:42:52 [MUSIC]
00:43:02 [MUSIC]
00:43:12 [MUSIC]
00:43:22 I don't wanna leave, but I have to go catch a train back to Jersey for tomorrow.
00:43:38 But can I see you the day after?
00:43:40 >> You will see me as long as you want to.
00:43:43 >> Good, cuz I don't wanna see you the day after.
00:43:47 And maybe the day after that, and probably the day after that.
00:43:52 And I guess we'll see about the day after that.
00:43:55 [MUSIC]
00:44:03 >> Hey, hey, hey, hey.
00:44:05 That's that guy from the van.
00:44:06 That's the dude that ripped us off, dude.
00:44:09 >> Who?
00:44:10 >> Him, that mole right there.
00:44:11 That's the dude from the van, man.
00:44:13 >> The guy in the van?
00:44:14 >> Yeah.
00:44:15 >> I don't think so, man.
00:44:16 >> No, that's definitely him, dude.
00:44:17 That asshole owes me 100 bucks.
00:44:18 Come on.
00:44:19 [MUSIC]
00:44:25 >> Hey, Ben.
00:44:26 You're here today.
00:44:27 Got a couple cavities to do.
00:44:29 You've done this before.
00:44:30 It's really pretty easy.
00:44:31 First thing I'm gonna do is tip you back just a little bit.
00:44:35 Just this light.
00:44:36 That's good.
00:44:38 A little bit of Novocaine.
00:44:40 [KNOCKING]
00:44:41 Hold on.
00:44:42 Matthew.
00:44:43 Ben, Matthew's here.
00:44:44 Matthew's a student at NYU.
00:44:46 He's gonna help us today.
00:44:48 Matthew, why don't you give him a little bit of Novocaine?
00:44:50 [MUSIC]
00:45:00 >> You didn't have to gas him.
00:45:02 >> Oh, I guess I misunderstood.
00:45:04 >> Yes, I gotta come home and change.
00:45:06 What time is your party?
00:45:07 >> Four o'clock.
00:45:08 >> Four o'clock?
00:45:11 Hey, aren't you the douchebag from last summer's picnic?
00:45:15 Are you serious?
00:45:17 >> You make me sick.
00:45:18 [MUSIC]
00:45:25 >> We got fucking robbed, Pluto.
00:45:26 >> I got fucking robbed.
00:45:28 >> What are you doing?
00:45:29 Shouldn't we call the police or something?
00:45:31 >> And say what?
00:45:32 Oh, please help me, officer.
00:45:33 These bad men who I sold drugs to came and stole my other drugs.
00:45:37 >> You sold drugs?
00:45:38 >> Well, not actually.
00:45:39 I actually sold them children's vitamins and told them they were drugs.
00:45:42 >> This is because of one of your fucking characters, isn't it?
00:45:45 I told you, there are consequences.
00:45:47 You can't just go around being whoever you want and doing whatever you want
00:45:51 and expect it not to bite you in the ass.
00:45:54 >> Watch me.
00:45:56 >> You're doing it now?
00:45:57 >> I have to put these little shits in their place.
00:45:59 >> Pluto, I almost got killed.
00:46:00 Does that mean anything to you?
00:46:02 >> You didn't almost get killed, okay?
00:46:03 You slept through a robbery.
00:46:05 >> Okay, fine, this time, but what about next time?
00:46:07 >> There won't be a next time.
00:46:09 >> But how do you know?
00:46:10 You don't because you're going to keep doing this shit
00:46:13 until something really terrible happens.
00:46:16 >> I'll get an alarm.
00:46:17 >> You're such a brat.
00:46:19 >> Excuse me?
00:46:20 >> You're a little selfish brat.
00:46:22 >> Okay, I need to go fix this.
00:46:24 >> So fix it by staying, by getting your apartment together.
00:46:27 >> I'm sorry.
00:46:29 >> Okay, I'm leaving.
00:46:31 >> Where?
00:46:32 >> I don't know, home.
00:46:33 >> What do you mean home?
00:46:34 This is your home.
00:46:35 >> No, I can't be here anymore.
00:46:36 >> Simon, you're not going to come to Thanksgiving with me?
00:46:38 >> Frankly, I don't want to go anywhere with you.
00:46:40 >> Simon.
00:46:42 >> And let's admit it, it's about time.
00:46:44 I've been mooching off you for long enough.
00:46:46 >> I like when you mooch off of me.
00:46:48 >> My mom's going to be home alone tonight.
00:46:51 I'm going to go spend Thanksgiving with her.
00:46:53 >> After what she did, you're just going to let that slide?
00:46:56 >> She's my mother and call me crazy, but yeah,
00:46:59 it's enough for me to let it slide.
00:47:01 >> And what about me?
00:47:03 >> I just need to go home.
00:47:05 >> Fine.
00:47:07 Leave your key.
00:47:09 >> What?
00:47:10 >> This isn't a hotel.
00:47:11 Leave your key and go.
00:47:18 >> Okay, then.
00:47:22 [phone ringing]
00:47:36 >> Hello.
00:47:38 Yes, Pluto.
00:47:40 Why?
00:47:42 How late?
00:47:48 >> What the fuck is that?
00:47:50 >> It's Thanksgiving.
00:47:52 Do you know what that is?
00:47:54 >> You ordered pizza?
00:47:56 >> Have you ever heard of it?
00:47:58 Or is it maybe a foreign concept to you?
00:48:00 >> Did you really think I was going to let that slide?
00:48:03 >> Oh, fuck.
00:48:04 >> Sit down.
00:48:05 Go.
00:48:06 Have a slice.
00:48:07 >> Why isn't he coming?
00:48:09 Okay.
00:48:11 Tell him I said I hope he's feeling better soon.
00:48:13 >> It's pizza.
00:48:14 It's free.
00:48:16 Shut up and eat the fucking pizza.
00:48:18 >> Something is burning.
00:48:21 >> Is that a fake mustache?
00:48:23 >> What's with your accent?
00:48:25 >> Shut up.
00:48:26 >> Fine.
00:48:27 Just come as soon as you can.
00:48:29 >> You ripped us off.
00:48:30 What did you expect us to do?
00:48:32 >> Goodbye.
00:48:34 >> Why would you eat something that the guy you just robbed gave you?
00:48:39 >> Mr. Ox, is there something I can help you with?
00:48:42 >> Oh, no.
00:48:44 Thanks for asking, dear.
00:48:45 >> Don't worry.
00:48:46 You guys will wake up.
00:48:48 >> Oh, you look beautiful.
00:48:50 I can hardly wait to see Paul come and see you with a lady.
00:48:53 >> Rosie, something is definitely burning.
00:48:56 >> You fucking.
00:49:01 >> This is plastic, by the way.
00:49:05 >> I'm sorry I'm late.
00:49:18 >> Oh, well.
00:49:20 Look who showed up just in time for dessert.
00:49:23 Pluto, you remember Mr. and Mrs. Whitfield and their daughter Olivia?
00:49:28 >> Oh, my God.
00:49:30 >> Say something.
00:49:32 I know it must have been years since you've seen each other.
00:49:35 >> Yeah, it feels like yesterday.
00:49:37 >> Oh, right.
00:49:39 You kids have that Facebook or whatever it is.
00:49:42 It kind of kills the spirit of reunion.
00:49:44 >> When did you get a Facebook?
00:49:46 >> See?
00:49:48 You didn't even Facebook me.
00:49:56 I'm sorry.
00:50:00 >> Olivia, please.
00:50:02 >> What do you want?
00:50:04 >> Let me explain.
00:50:06 >> Do you even speak French?
00:50:08 >> I know like five words.
00:50:10 >> I hate you.
00:50:12 >> No, please let me explain.
00:50:14 I didn't mean for this to happen like this.
00:50:16 >> Leave me alone.
00:50:18 >> Excuse me.
00:50:20 Sorry to interrupt, but Claire and I have an announcement to make.
00:50:23 What is this?
00:50:25 >> I can listen.
00:50:27 >> I'd like to apologize for my appearance.
00:50:31 I ran into a little trouble earlier.
00:50:35 Anyways, as you all know, Claire and I have been dating for some time now.
00:50:41 >> Yeah?
00:50:43 >> And, well, we're getting married.
00:50:48 [laughter]
00:50:51 >> You're what?
00:50:53 >> Pluto, please.
00:50:55 >> Pluto, don't be rude.
00:50:57 >> Claire, what the hell are you thinking?
00:50:59 >> Pluto, shut up, seriously.
00:51:01 >> This guy's a douche bag.
00:51:03 He just wants our money.
00:51:05 >> Pluto, nobody cares what you think.
00:51:07 >> I can't believe you're going to fall for his lies.
00:51:09 >> What did you say?
00:51:11 >> You heard me, cock boy.
00:51:13 >> My lies.
00:51:15 Look, I'd like to tell you all a little story about my good friend Pluto here.
00:51:19 >> Shut up, douche bag.
00:51:21 >> Pluto is a magnificent liar.
00:51:23 All the damn time.
00:51:25 >> Shut up.
00:51:27 >> Pluto, well, that's a lie right there.
00:51:29 That's not even his real name.
00:51:31 >> I will climb across this table and I will beat you in the face.
00:51:33 >> Besides that, Pluto likes to dress up as people and play Fantasyland all day long.
00:51:37 >> That's not true.
00:51:39 >> Yes, it is.
00:51:41 I've seen him do it.
00:51:43 He screws with people and he gets off on it.
00:51:45 Lie after lie after lie.
00:51:47 >> Is that right?
00:51:49 >> No, that's not how it was with you, okay?
00:51:51 >> Shut up, douche.
00:51:53 And not some stupid kid I met in grade school.
00:51:55 >> No, no, no, how I feel, okay?
00:51:57 Everything was true.
00:51:59 >> Mrs. Strauss, thank you very much for a wonderful Thanksgiving.
00:52:01 Congratulations on your engagement.
00:52:03 I'm not feeling that great, so I'm going to excuse myself.
00:52:07 It was really nice to see all of you again.
00:52:11 I'll see you at home.
00:52:13 >> Wait, Olivia, hold on.
00:52:15 Can I see you tomorrow?
00:52:17 >> Why would I see you tomorrow?
00:52:19 I don't even know who you are.
00:52:21 >> Well, congratulations, sweetheart.
00:52:41 I'm so happy for you both.
00:52:43 >> Thanks, Mom.
00:52:45 >> Way to go, douchebag.
00:52:47 [ Music ]
00:52:49 [ Music ]
00:52:51 [ Music ]
00:52:53 [ Music ]
00:52:55 [ Music ]
00:52:57 [ Music ]
00:52:59 [ Music ]
00:53:01 [ Music ]
00:53:03 The sky's anything but blue Simply recall this summer day
00:53:15 Smile and sunshine in your face And the baby I'm nothing without you
00:53:32 And when it rains, let it pour Let it sweep through the door
00:53:42 For all your sorrows dry in June Just think of the promise that we made
00:53:52 Laughing for hours in the shade You'll say, baby I'm nothing without you
00:54:04 Well I tried walking alone Out in the cold
00:54:14 Storm winds blowing black and blue But when that moment arrived
00:54:24 With your lips touching mine It got me through, you got me through
00:54:36 So pick a cloud in the sky Or a bird humming by
00:54:45 And curl in closer 'neath its tune For if you can't find your sunny way
00:54:56 You can take comfort in your pain 'Cause baby I'm nothing
00:55:05 Sweet baby I'm nothing My baby I'm nothing
00:55:15 Without you
00:55:21 Now he was a douchebag I know
00:55:30 Do you?
00:55:33 Days like this make you remember Well, it's about time you should
00:55:41 You've been mourning a man who's been dead for years
00:55:44 A man you were never particularly fond of, as I recall
00:55:47 He was a jerk, all the time All the time
00:55:53 You married him Well, he was really very handsome
00:55:57 And I thought I could change him But that man never cared about anybody
00:56:03 But himself, and you know it Still, we come here every year
00:56:12 Because he was a person, and he died And it's the right thing to do
00:56:18 And he left us with financial security For the rest of our lives
00:56:23 And we should be thankful for that I hate the money
00:56:26 You'd be whistling a different tune if you didn't have it
00:56:29 Although sometimes I wish we didn't have any of it
00:56:37 You wouldn't act the way you do I'm sorry
00:56:44 But come to a decision You will no longer play the games
00:56:52 you've been playing with your life With our lives
00:56:55 Cut this shit out No more wins, no more costumes
00:57:03 No more silly disguises Forgot this?
00:57:07 Grow up Be the man in the family
00:57:09 Something your father could never do Just take this day to remember who he was
00:57:17 And what not to do with your life Or don't expect a scent of his ever again
00:57:23 Okay
00:57:31 Talk with the man who worked with him years ago
00:57:34 He said he could set you up with a job starting next week
00:57:37 There, hand it to you on a platter As usual
00:57:41 I expect you there I want you to at least try
00:57:49 You owe me that much, Paul Oh, and one more on the subject
00:57:53 Paul, that's your fucking name I'm your mother
00:57:58 I birthed you, I named you If anything else, I should be left with that
00:58:03 What is this Pluto baloney anyway?
00:58:07 Dad died around the same time that they were known as Pluto as a planet
00:58:13 I just didn't think it was very fair I mean, he was the underdog planet
00:58:19 I always wanted a cool name and I knew it was the only time I'd be able to get away with it
00:58:25 Oh, cut that shit out
00:58:32 [Music]
00:58:46 [Music]
00:58:56 I hate the sight of your face
00:59:13 I hate the sight of your face too Your play is good
00:59:18 Really? Yes
00:59:20 And admitting that is... it's hard It's really hard
00:59:25 It's like... it's like being choked to death by a snake, an evil snake
00:59:30 That makes you eat mushrooms Mushrooms?
00:59:32 I hate mushrooms I don't think I should be in it
00:59:37 Why not? Because I don't know the first thing about acting, Ben
00:59:43 Well, I love mushrooms and I will eat that plate for you because I think you could be great
00:59:53 Especially at this Okay
00:59:58 Okay, sure Where is this thing happening?
01:00:02 Festivals in Brooklyn No, no, no, no, no
01:00:04 I don't do other boroughs I'll get you your own place
01:00:07 My treat Really?
01:00:09 Sure Why?
01:00:12 Why? Wow, thank you
01:00:14 And I don't care if you're marrying Claire, don't ever call me brother
01:00:18 Okay Okay
01:00:24 Okay Okay
01:00:30 Okay Okay
01:00:33 Okay Yeah
01:00:34 Okay Okay
01:00:36 Okay Okay
01:00:38 Take care now Okay
01:00:43 [Music]
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01:01:22 [Music]
01:01:32 [Music]
01:01:42 [Music]
01:01:52 [Music]
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01:02:22 [Music]
01:02:32 I brought a... I brought a joint
01:02:35 I know this will probably be your last session so I figured, hey, for old time's sake
01:02:42 Um, I'm good, thanks though Really?
01:02:46 Yeah, yeah, I have a dress rehearsal after this so I'm trying to focus and whatnot
01:02:52 Oh Plus I have work in the morning
01:02:53 Well that's great because I think I rolled a really terrible one
01:02:56 You know you need to take a step back and look how much has changed
01:03:04 You're not even doing what brought you into my office in the first place
01:03:07 You're a different person You're a different person than the man I met six months ago
01:03:11 Aren't you proud of yourself?
01:03:14 Look I liked doing what I was doing
01:03:21 It was fun
01:03:22 It's just that the excuse is just not good enough anymore
01:03:28 Your father?
01:03:30 I'm just pissed that he got away with it
01:03:34 Oh he fucking got away with it
01:03:36 And he took the easy way out
01:03:39 By dying?
01:03:39 Yeah, by dying
01:03:40 Plus he's getting what he always wanted
01:03:43 Which is what?
01:03:44 I'm at his office working for his company that he built
01:03:49 Oh he would just love it
01:03:51 Even after he's dead he's still making me do things I don't want to do
01:03:55 I remember a few weeks after he died I called my mom at the house to see how she'd been
01:04:05 You know check in on her
01:04:06 And the voicemail picked up
01:04:09 And it was still his voice they hadn't changed the machine yet
01:04:13 And I hung up quick
01:04:18 And then I called back
01:04:20 And then I called back again
01:04:23 I kept listening to his voice over and over again
01:04:28 God it felt like I hadn't heard it in so long
01:04:31 It almost felt like I'd never heard it at all before
01:04:35 Eventually Rosie picked up apparently I woke her up from a nap
01:04:46 I've made a lot of mistakes and I'm sorry that I hurt a lot of people
01:04:54 But I don't regret what I've done
01:04:59 I just regret the excuse
01:05:02 And I regret what I did to that girl
01:05:15 Well maybe she'll come to the play
01:05:16 Yeah maybe
01:05:18 She hasn't reserved a ticket yet
01:05:21 There's still time
01:05:21 I got mine
01:05:22 I think you'll like it
01:05:24 It's pretty good
01:05:25 Pretty fucked up though so I hope you aren't offended easily
01:05:28 And now ladies and gentlemen a comedy
01:05:42 Is
01:05:56 Me
01:06:10 Hey awesome man
01:06:28 Thanks Greg
01:06:29 No seriously I'm really impressed
01:06:30 Oh thank you so much for coming on
01:06:32 I was hoping Olivia would show up
01:06:34 Well maybe you just missed her
01:06:35 Yeah yeah maybe
01:06:36 Mom
01:06:38 Paul oh you were wonderful
01:06:40 Now I don't actually know if you give flowers to men so if you don't want to take them I can hold
01:06:45 them for you
01:06:45 No it's fine
01:06:47 Well really I am so proud of you
01:06:49 Mom you remember Dr. Dancing
01:06:51 The Greg is fine
01:06:52 Hey whatever the hell your name is you did so good
01:06:57 Thank you
01:06:57 She didn't show up
01:06:59 Yes she did
01:06:59 She did?
01:07:00 Yeah she slipped out before everyone else did
01:07:02 Oh at least she came here
01:07:04 Yeah and who even cares you were so good I'm so proud of my boy
01:07:07 Oh and Ben too I mean that was a great play
01:07:09 Kind of fucked up
01:07:11 I told you
01:07:12 Yeah but cool as shit
01:07:13 Yeah yeah yeah good for him
01:07:15 I gotta go I have work in the morning
01:07:18 Oh yeah how's that going
01:07:19 You know it's uh it's work uh so it's it's fine for now
01:07:23 Well you did great
01:07:25 Thanks
01:07:25 Call me tomorrow
01:07:26 I'm gonna go have a drink or two I had like three Red Bull before the play and now I feel
01:07:30 like an epileptic I'm like why
01:07:32 All right buddy
01:07:32 All right I'll see you at home
01:07:34 Kel Benison congratulations
01:07:36 Thanks
01:07:36 Everything all right
01:07:41 Everything's great
01:07:42 You're great
01:07:43 Come in
01:08:01 Hi Mrs. Strauss
01:08:05 Paul come on in
01:08:06 Right Paul something came for you it came to my desk by accident just thought I'd bring it on over
01:08:12 Oh sure yeah you can just leave it on the desk thanks
01:08:14 I knew your father
01:08:22 Uh yeah yeah I imagine you would have working here
01:08:27 No I really knew him had lunch together almost every day for 25 years
01:08:34 Well then uh you probably knew him better than I did
01:08:38 I just I just didn't expect to see you here
01:08:41 What?
01:08:42 Well from what he always said he always said that uh when he spoke of you that you were destined
01:08:49 for better things bigger things
01:08:51 Well I guess my father didn't know me that well after all did he
01:08:54 No you see the thing is he asked me
01:09:01 made me promise actually that if I ever saw you here if you ever came to work in this building that
01:09:08 that I would I would make you leave
01:09:13 Are you firing me?
01:09:16 No no I don't have any authority to fire you I just
01:09:21 I didn't want to break a promise to your father
01:09:27 I know you had your differences but he was a good man from what I knew he was
01:09:31 He kept me employed for many years of my life put bread on my family's table
01:09:38 He always took care of me and for that I am grateful so I can't break a promise
01:09:49 I don't understand what you want me to do
01:09:55 I want you to leave Mr Strauss
01:09:57 and I kindly hope I don't ever see you again
01:10:05 It was a real pleasure
01:10:22 [Music]
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01:10:55 [Thud]
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