The Thundermans Season 3 Episode 6 Evil Never Sleeps
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TVTranscript
00:00 Orly, I just really didn't like the look of those troublemakers.
00:03 You mean the clowns?
00:05 [audience laughter]
00:07 [laughs]
00:07 Don't worry, our next date will be clown-free.
00:11 [sighs]
00:12 [imitates a clown]
00:15 [audience laughter]
00:17 See ya, buddy!
00:19 [imitates a clown]
00:20 [audience laughter]
00:21 [beep, beep, beep]
00:21 Alert! Alert! Incoming transmission from Super President Kickbutt.
00:27 [imitates a clown]
00:30 Okay, how does that even make sense?
00:32 [audience laughter]
00:33 Hello, Phoebe.
00:35 The Hero League needs you to investigate one of our most dastardly supervillains.
00:41 You must tell no one.
00:43 This is so awesome! My first big takedown!
00:46 Who's the unlucky, soon-to-be-defeated jerk?
00:49 Evilman.
00:51 Well, he is going down-- I'm sorry, did you say Evilman?
00:54 [audience laughter]
00:56 As in Link's dad, Evilman?
00:58 Even though he claims he's retired, we have evidence that suggests he's up to his old tricks.
01:05 Okay, um, if it's alright with you, before I investigate my boyfriend's dad for being evil,
01:11 I'm gonna have to see some of this so-called "evidence."
01:14 Guess who has two thumbs and just got hired by Evilman to be his evil protege?
01:19 This guy!
01:20 [audience laughter]
01:22 Evil-Evil!
01:23 [audience laughter]
01:25 Did you hear that? Evilman just hired Max to--
01:28 Oh...
01:29 So, we're good here?
01:31 Yeah, we're good.
01:32 [audience laughter]
01:34 [music]
01:37 What you see is not what you get
01:41 Living our lives with a secret
01:45 We fit right in, I bet you never guessed
01:49 We're living our lives just like all the rest
01:52 A picture-perfect family is what we try to be
01:57 The closer you must be, the crazy things we do
02:01 This isn't make-believe, it's our reality
02:04 Just your average family trying to be normal
02:08 Stay out of trouble, living a double life
02:13 Look, Phoebe, I'm a superhero too.
02:20 I'm Popperfingers.
02:23 [audience laughter]
02:24 Oh, sorry, Terry. I'm just, um, I'm distracted, thinking about something.
02:29 What's up? Hey, Megan Hill.
02:31 Well, it's just that--
02:33 Ugh, I probably shouldn't tell you this.
02:35 Um, okay, I have a superhero friend named Fiona
02:42 whose boyfriend's dad is a huge villain named, um, Evil Stan.
02:48 [audience laughter]
02:49 That Stan sounds like an evil man.
02:52 He's retired now, but if he's up to no good again,
02:55 Fiona has to turn him in.
02:57 Fiona better turn that man in.
02:59 But what about her boyfriend?
03:01 Crink.
03:03 Crink Schmink. She's a superhero.
03:07 Besides, what if his dad does something horrible, like erases November?
03:11 My birthday's in November.
03:14 [audience laughter]
03:16 You're right. Fiona has to do what's right.
03:19 Also, your birthday's in December.
03:21 [audience laughter]
03:23 [music]
03:27 Yep, yep, got it. All right.
03:31 Thanks again for bringing me on to teach me your evil ways, evil man.
03:35 Hey, hey, hey.
03:37 Here, I'm Mr. Evelman.
03:40 Right. Your cover.
03:43 I'm the mild mannered owner of this failing mattress store.
03:48 First of all, thanks to bed bug season, we're doing quite well.
03:53 And second, I only hired you because a tiny lady just quit on me
03:58 and you look like you'll fit the uniform.
04:00 [audience laughter]
04:02 You're doing a great job at pretending you don't like me.
04:06 [audience laughter]
04:11 Really? You brought your daddy to wipe your boom boom on your first day?
04:16 [audience laughter]
04:17 Hey, I handle my own boom boom.
04:20 And I thought he left after he dropped me off.
04:24 Hank!
04:26 Oh, hey!
04:27 [laughs]
04:28 Well, I see your butt has good taste.
04:31 You found the couch-tress.
04:33 Part couch, part mattress, all comfort.
04:37 [audience laughter]
04:39 How about it?
04:40 [coughs]
04:42 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
04:44 Comfort ain't cheap.
04:46 Uh, I'm gonna have to sleep on it.
04:49 [audience laughter]
04:56 When he wakes up, I'll close the deal.
04:58 Whoa, whoa, that's not your job.
05:01 That is your job.
05:03 Anytime someone comes in or leaves, you make sure those doors get closed.
05:08 All the cold air is getting out.
05:10 [audience laughter]
05:14 Oh, I get it.
05:17 Keeping the doors shut teaches me to keep my mouth shut if I'm ever interrogated.
05:24 [audience laughter]
05:27 Wake at me again, and I'll take your eyelids.
05:30 [audience laughter]
05:32 Come on, Chloe. We're leaving for the park.
05:36 Let's do it!
05:38 [audience laughter]
05:39 Let's undo it.
05:41 [audience laughter]
05:42 What are you talking about? She looks adorable.
05:45 Come on, sweetie. Let's go put on some sunscreen.
05:48 [audience laughter]
05:50 We cannot let her go to the park like that.
05:53 Everyone will laugh at her.
05:55 I know. She went to the zoo last week,
05:58 and she got more looks than that chimp chewing on that poor kid's ear.
06:02 [audience laughter]
06:04 How is your ear?
06:05 Better.
06:06 [audience laughter]
06:08 All right. Let's go.
06:10 Uh, yeah. About the park. I bet it's really crowded.
06:15 Don't you think, Billy?
06:17 I'll check.
06:18 [audience laughter]
06:21 It is packed. Ten kids pile up on the slide.
06:25 [audience laughter]
06:26 Oh, well, I guess we'll have to go another time.
06:29 Come on, Chloe.
06:31 [audience laughter]
06:33 To save Chloe from total embarrassment, up top.
06:37 [audience laughter]
06:38 Ow! That's not how it works!
06:41 [audience laughter]
06:42 [music]
06:46 Ty Flip Cam, meet Max's ugly Ty.
06:50 [audience laughter]
06:51 Together, you are going to show me what twisted shenanigans evil man is up to.
06:57 But first, extreme close-up!
07:01 Whoa!
07:03 [audience laughter]
07:20 Hey, you okay, Dad?
07:22 I can't find anything comfortable in the whole house!
07:25 [audience laughter]
07:28 Hey, looking good, Max. You on your way to a dweeb rally?
07:33 What about you? You going to a...
07:37 You're a dweeb rally!
07:39 [audience laughter]
07:41 Hey, Max, do you need a ride to the couch-tress?
07:45 You mean work?
07:46 I'm aware of what I said.
07:48 Leave me in the car!
07:50 [audience laughter]
07:54 Uh, Phoebe, have you seen my Ty?
07:56 Yeah, it's right over there. Mom said she left a gift on it for you.
08:01 Oh! Fancy!
08:04 I'll be the best-dressed guy at my new evil job.
08:07 I mean, regular job.
08:10 [audience laughter]
08:12 Did you just wink at me?
08:13 Oh, it's become a problem.
08:15 [audience laughter]
08:20 It was a bed, and like that...
08:24 It's this thing!
08:26 Whoa! The future is now. I'll take one.
08:30 Awesome! Pull your car around, we'll get you taken care of.
08:33 [audience laughter]
08:36 Max!
08:37 Sorry, I'll get back to the doors.
08:39 No, no, no, no, no! I'm impressed!
08:43 I'm promoting you to sales trainee!
08:46 Is that code for... evil deputy?
08:50 [audience laughter]
08:52 You can call yourself whatever you want, so long as you keep pushing the cushion.
08:57 [evil laughter]
09:01 Come on! You brought your dad back?
09:04 Hank!
09:06 [audience laughter]
09:10 Hank!
09:12 [audience laughter]
09:14 Come on! You just can't sit on the couch for us all day.
09:18 This is a big decision. I need to simulate my exact night time routine.
09:24 Can you rub my feet and let me talk about my day?
09:27 [audience laughter]
09:30 Uh oh. Oh, hey! Whoa, whoa!
09:33 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Sorry, sorry, sorry!
09:35 This mattress isn't for sale.
09:38 How about some stickers for the kid?
09:41 There we go! So cute! I'm so sorry.
09:46 You cannot sell this mattress.
09:49 It's my nap mattress.
09:51 Okay? So don't go near it again. You got it?
09:55 Go rub your dad's feet.
09:57 [audience laughter]
10:01 Sure is acting weird about that sad little bed.
10:04 I'm sensing twisted shenanigans.
10:07 Who you talking to?
10:09 [audience laughter]
10:11 No one.
10:13 Where are you going?
10:15 Nowhere.
10:17 [audience laughter]
10:19 Alright then. Don't wait up!
10:21 [audience laughter]
10:22 [theme music]
10:27 That feeling you're experiencing right now, Chloe, is awesomeness!
10:32 My head itches.
10:35 [audience laughter]
10:38 What in bikini bottom is happening right now?
10:42 [audience laughter]
10:43 You two look exactly alike.
10:46 You're right. She looks great and she's loving it.
10:50 My head is on fire!
10:53 [audience laughter]
10:56 Girl, your whole look is on fire.
10:59 [audience laughter]
11:04 [theme music]
11:08 Thanks for coming with me, Cherry.
11:10 It was either this or stay at home and watch my dad clip his toenails.
11:14 Yeah, well, here you can watch my dad do it.
11:17 [audience laughter]
11:22 So, bet you didn't know that the actual Mattress Mike worked here, did you?
11:27 From the commercials?
11:29 Yeah, and I hear he needs dancers for his next one.
11:32 I'm gonna go show him my moves.
11:35 Yo, Mattress Mike!
11:37 [audience laughter]
11:39 [dance music]
11:47 Thank you, Cherry.
11:49 [audience laughter]
11:54 Isn't there a Mr. Old Lady that can be helping you out with this?
11:58 [audience laughter]
12:07 Okay, Mattress, reveal your secrets.
12:10 [audience laughter]
12:12 Sleep speedometer?
12:14 The thing?
12:16 [audience laughter]
12:23 And then there was a missile.
12:25 [audience laughter]
12:28 [beep]
12:30 President Kickbutt, please! It's a national crisis!
12:33 Now, don't put me on hold!
12:35 Oh, I love this song.
12:37 [audience laughter]
12:40 Hey, Phoebe.
12:42 I didn't know that Mattress Mike is Link's dad. He just walked in.
12:45 But Link is in the store?
12:48 Uh-huh.
12:50 And so is this missile!
12:53 Okay, just don't freak out. I'm on the line with the Hero League right now.
12:57 This is just like your friend Fiona, who has that boyfriend,
13:01 whose dad is a bad guy, and...
13:03 [gasps]
13:05 Oh my gosh! You're Fiona, Link's dad is Evil Stan, Link is Kranken...
13:09 This missile is a missile!
13:11 [audience laughter]
13:13 Why didn't you just tell me?
13:15 Because I'm not allowed to tell you Hero League secrets.
13:18 That's why I was doing this.
13:20 I thought you were just doing bunny puppets to help me focus.
13:24 [audience laughter]
13:26 Link is going to be crushed if you turn into his dad.
13:29 Well, hey, I'm just doing the right thing, remember?
13:31 This was your advice.
13:33 That advice was for Fiona, not you.
13:36 If you go through with this, Link is going to break up with you.
13:39 Phoebe, did you find something at Evil Man's Mattress store?
13:43 Um...
13:46 Never mind.
13:59 I have to turn Evil Man in. Have to.
14:01 But I don't want to break up with Link.
14:03 Don't wanna.
14:04 What should I do?
14:05 What shoulda knew?
14:07 [audience laughter]
14:09 Uh-oh. That's Link. I forgot we're supposed to hang out tonight.
14:16 Oh, before you arrest his dad, will you ask him how I did on my dance audition?
14:21 If it comes up.
14:24 Good luck.
14:29 [door opens]
14:31 Hey, Link. You on your way?
14:35 Actually, I have to cancel.
14:37 My dad's still at work, so I'm watching my little brother.
14:40 Isn't the store closed at night?
14:42 Yeah, but he's staying late. Some top secret project.
14:45 Top secret?
14:47 Yeah, sounds like he's about to launch something big.
14:50 I know what he's launching.
14:51 Also, Cherry's banned from the store.
14:54 Wouldn't be the first time.
14:56 Talk to you later. Gotta go.
14:58 Woo!
15:01 Ha ha!
15:03 What a day I had, Colosso!
15:05 I sold three mattresses and saved Evil Man $35 in his electric bill.
15:10 Listen to yourself.
15:13 Evil Man's not teaching you anything about being evil.
15:16 Oh, sure he is.
15:18 It's all part of his master plan.
15:21 Little by little, he's grooming me to become the next great supervillain.
15:26 He's grooming you to be his weekend manager.
15:30 Look at yourself!
15:32 Holy suburban sales nerd!
15:41 What happened to me?
15:43 My hair is parting itself?
15:46 Is that a cell phone holster?
15:49 I have to go down to that mattress store right now and quit!
15:53 That's my max!
15:56 Now make sure you get rid of that cell phone holster!
15:59 Already did.
16:01 Stop doing that!
16:03 And the finishing touch.
16:10 A beautiful bow.
16:12 Now when Mom and Dad take us out to dinner, you won't look ridiculous.
16:17 I feel like a birthday present.
16:20 That's right, Chloe. With that bow, you're a gift to the world.
16:27 Look, Billy. I fixed her.
16:31 What?
16:33 Let it go!
16:36 Give it!
16:37 Never!
16:38 It's mine!
16:39 Whoa, whoa! What's going on?
16:41 Nora dressed Chloe up like a doof.
16:44 Only because Billy dressed her up like a chucklehead.
16:47 I don't want to be a chucklehead.
16:51 Look, I know you're trying to help your little sister, but she likes the way she dresses.
17:00 Mom, people are going to laugh at her if she's out there dressed like a lost and found box.
17:05 Chloe doesn't care about what other people think about her clothes, so why should you two?
17:12 Maybe you should care less about what she's wearing and more about what she's feeling, chuckleheads.
17:20 I think we just got mommed.
17:25 Yeah, you did!
17:27 Good evening, evil man.
17:34 Phoebe! How did you get in here?
17:38 Did your brother leave those doors open again?
17:42 Yeah, it's about the missile you're hiding under that mattress over there.
17:46 Would you believe that was there when I bought the place?
17:50 Look, the Hero League sent me to bring you in, but I'm worried about what that'll do to Link.
17:56 He's a good kid.
17:58 You know, he and I have really been bonding lately.
18:02 We flew a kite the other day.
18:05 It was a ladybug.
18:08 I think you should turn yourself in.
18:11 Hmm, doesn't sound like something I'd do.
18:16 Just think about Link. He would hate me if I turned you in, and he's really going to need somebody when you're rotting in jail.
18:24 Well...
18:27 Since you put it that way...
18:32 Hey!
18:33 What are you doing?
18:40 Who, me?
18:43 Changing the missile's target from Hiddenville Central Library to the Hero League.
18:49 Now I hate them more than books.
18:58 Please, please put me in a more comfortable bed. This one's all springs.
19:02 Chloe, we're going to the spa parlor now. You should get ready.
19:13 I don't want to go.
19:15 We're sorry about what happened today, Chloe. We were wrong to tell you what to wear.
19:26 Yeah, you're not a chucklehead. We're the chuckleheads.
19:30 And doofs.
19:32 Huge doofs. You should just be yourself and dress how you want. And we promise to love it.
19:41 Do you forgive us?
19:43 Not yet.
19:47 Now I forgive you.
19:51 I'm so pulling this off.
19:55 I don't know what's happening here, but I like it. And don't let anyone turn you into a suburban sales nerd.
20:06 What's with the cell phone holster?
20:09 You are not a part of me!
20:22 Three minutes till the Hero League is a pile of rubble and spandex.
20:29 I'm nuts.
20:45 [Hero League music]
20:47 Nice try. Maybe if you give up now, it'll go easy on you.
20:56 I'm Evil Man! Nothing can stop me!
21:00 I can't believe you stopped me!
21:09 Well, too bad you haven't the guts to turn me in. You couldn't do that to your precious Link. He'd never forgive you!
21:20 Hey, Dad, I'm here. What do you need?
21:23 Is this for a new commercial, or...
21:28 Sure is.
21:30 We're freezing prices and blowing up the competition.
21:37 But aren't we, Phoebe?
21:39 This is where you lie to save your relationship.
21:43 Link, your dad is trying to destroy the Hero League, and I have to stop him.
21:49 What?
21:50 You're probably going to break up with me for this, but I have a job to do.
21:54 President Kickbutt, please?
21:58 I have Evil Man.
22:01 Well done!
22:03 [applause]
22:05 Well, that was quick.
22:09 Congratulations! You passed the test!
22:12 Test?
22:14 The Hero League needed to make sure you were willing to put your superhero life ahead of your personal life.
22:20 And again I say, test?
22:23 I know it wasn't easy, but you just took a huge step toward becoming a full-fledged superhero.
22:32 Okay, as much as I love passing tests, that is messed up!
22:36 Also, I hope that outburst doesn't affect my grade.
22:41 Link, I'm so sorry I had to turn your dad in.
22:50 I completely understand if you want to break up with me.
22:53 Why would I do that?
22:55 'Cause I chose my job over our relationship.
22:58 It's called doing the right thing.
23:01 And besides, who would I have to lean on while my dad was rotting away in jail?
23:06 No jail can hold me! I can break out of anything!
23:12 A little help, Phoebe?
23:18 Ha! Out of anything.
23:26 Hey, Evil Man!
23:30 (Gunshot)
23:32 Try closing your doors now.
23:40 My doors!
23:45 My counstress!
23:48 Counstress.
23:51 Wait a minute.
23:57 What's everyone doing here?
24:00 Our friend Evil Man came out of retirement to help us test your sister.
24:06 You were helping the Hero League?
24:10 Yeah! They bought a ton of those flip-up beds.
24:14 And they also got me a fishing boat you can't tell your mom about.
24:18 You may have gone Suburban Soft, but I haven't!
24:25 Say goodbye to whatever this is aimed at!
24:29 Way to go, Max!
24:42 That ice cream was supposed to be a surprise for Phoebe.
24:46 Look at that! They have all my favorite flavors and toppings!
24:50 Or... do they?
24:54 Viva la evil!
24:58 Viva la sprinkles!
25:02 Was he bringing a cell phone holster?
25:09 It should have been me!
25:14 (Screaming)
25:19 [imitates rocket]
25:21 Is that an ice cream rocket?