Graham and Dave choose their 10 Worst Films of 2023
Cocaine Bear
India Jones Dial of Destiny
The Marvels
Beau is Afraid
Strays
Killers of the Flower Moon
Renfield
Insidious The Red Door
Cocaine Bear
India Jones Dial of Destiny
The Marvels
Beau is Afraid
Strays
Killers of the Flower Moon
Renfield
Insidious The Red Door
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00 (upbeat music)
00:02 - Hello and welcome back to Not Everyone's
00:10 a film critic, a vodcaster, a podcaster.
00:13 We sort of stopped doing for a bit
00:15 because we had loads of holidays
00:16 and now we're back with two episodes in eight days.
00:19 So I don't know if we're just enjoying it
00:21 more than we should do or there's a demand there,
00:23 but we are back, either way we're back.
00:26 If you've missed last week's show
00:29 and obviously Christmas is coming up.
00:31 So you're gonna have a little bit more free time,
00:32 at least you should have more free time
00:34 to pretend you wanna hang out with family
00:36 and end up on the couch watching a film.
00:38 We did do our 10 best films of the year 2023 so far.
00:42 Obviously it's a couple of wonkers out today, for example,
00:45 it's a couple of extra films, so that may get added to,
00:48 but if you wanna go back to last week
00:49 and see what the best ones are,
00:51 what's worth watching, then certainly please do so.
00:53 We do recommend it if we do say so ourselves.
00:55 But this week, Dave, we are specializing
00:58 in something that we're a little bit better at,
01:00 which is the worst films of the year.
01:02 Because there's no such thing as a bad film,
01:06 'cause even a bad film is a good film
01:08 in some sort of weird ways,
01:09 but some films are pretty bad this year.
01:12 However, I wanna put out a disclaimer
01:14 before we go through our list.
01:16 I'll start to do my list.
01:17 Now, anyone who follows me on Twitter will know
01:19 I've got a list of every film I've seen in the cinema.
01:21 So I'm going through my list
01:22 trying to pick the 10 worst films.
01:24 I haven't seen 10 bad films this year.
01:26 So some of the reasons I'm using for this, right,
01:28 if you're watching and you're like a director
01:30 of one of the films, it's just my opinion.
01:32 And I don't even have that much conviction
01:34 in my opinion on the show today,
01:35 because I'm just scrambling for reasons
01:38 to put you on the list that wasn't the 10 best.
01:40 My list is more three or four bad films
01:44 and six pretty average ones
01:46 that left no impression on me whatsoever.
01:48 So the 10 worst list, but it's not the worst, really.
01:52 - Well, I can tell you that I've got a sore tooth
01:54 in the cold, so I'm gonna find,
01:56 I'm gonna sound quite odd today,
01:57 but I was so desperate to trash talk the films
02:00 that I hated that I had to come on the podcast today.
02:02 I had 17 films I've seen this year, which were awful.
02:06 So I had to narrow that down to 10,
02:07 which was quite difficult
02:09 because I really did not like all 17 of them.
02:11 And I really don't like these 10 films.
02:13 And I genuinely think that they're quite bad movies,
02:15 particularly the top like three or four.
02:17 But we'll get to that.
02:18 - You're gonna kick off a few of my choices,
02:20 but I'm gonna stand by them, I know that.
02:22 - You're gonna kick off one of my choices, definitely.
02:24 - I know I'm gonna kick off one of them.
02:26 Are we starting with you or starting with me this week?
02:29 I can't remember which avenue we went down.
02:30 - I think it was you last time, so should I start?
02:32 We'll count down from 10 to one, yeah?
02:34 So one's a no-go. - 10 to one, yeah.
02:37 - Well, my 10th, this could have been number one.
02:39 I don't know why it's number 10.
02:40 I think it's just because it's more boring than anything.
02:42 Like, I just cannot be bothered with it.
02:44 It's "Ant-Man and the Wasp" "Quantumania."
02:47 Now, Marvel have not had a good year this year.
02:49 I think everyone would admit
02:50 that they've had a pretty bad year.
02:52 This isn't the only Marvel film in this list.
02:54 For those who don't know, the plot is,
02:56 I don't know, because no one knows what the plot is,
02:58 because they go into the quantum realm
03:00 where anything can happen.
03:01 It doesn't matter if you die, you can come back.
03:03 It's just stupid.
03:05 I actually looked up the plot on the internet
03:07 to try to work out what the plot was again.
03:09 I could not find any decent plot synopsis,
03:12 because it's impossible, because there isn't a plot.
03:13 They just travel through time and space
03:15 and do stupid stuff.
03:16 It's a shame, because Paul Rudd's really good.
03:19 Evelina Lilly, I think, is the woman who plays the wasp.
03:24 She's good as well.
03:25 Michael Douglas needs to be put out to pasture now.
03:27 Michael Douglas does not look well in this film,
03:29 and I think he just needs to stop.
03:31 It's an awful film.
03:32 It's got no plot.
03:33 And I mean, I really wish I hadn't watched it.
03:35 I got to the end of it, and I just thought,
03:36 you know what, I'd rather have done anything else with that.
03:39 I think it's over two hours long as well.
03:40 So number 10, "Ant-Man and the Wasp," "Quantumania."
03:43 The third "Ant-Man," the first two were really good.
03:45 Third one, absolute bobbins.
03:47 - Never seen it.
03:48 Don't really have much interest in it,
03:49 but I feel like, but when Paul Rudd smiles,
03:52 I feel like the world--
03:54 - Wonderful, I won't spend time with Paul Rudd,
03:56 but not in this film, not in this film.
03:57 - Gorgeous man.
03:58 I once heard a rumor,
03:59 and people will know where I heard this rumor from
04:01 if you're a fan of the show.
04:02 If you don't, then go back in the previous catalogs
04:04 and listen to the previous 70 episodes and work it out,
04:08 and ruin your complete weekend by doing so.
04:10 But he once, or used to,
04:12 sleep with a copy of "The Room" under his pillow.
04:15 - (laughs) That's a great idea.
04:16 - DVD.
04:17 So the first sort of five, maybe even six films
04:22 that I've chosen on this
04:23 were nothing worse than a five out of 10.
04:26 - What on earth?
04:28 I am envious of your cinema going.
04:29 - I just didn't mind them that much,
04:32 but they also didn't really,
04:34 now, number 10, I feel a bit unfair with,
04:36 'cause did I like the film?
04:37 Yes.
04:38 So it's not a bad film.
04:39 It's not the worst film,
04:41 but based on my love of the particular franchise
04:44 we're gonna be speaking about,
04:46 I think it is the worst since the third one.
04:49 Everyone else thought it was great,
04:50 so completely ignore everything that I've said,
04:53 but it got in my top 10
04:55 on the basis that they've got rid of one of the actresses
04:57 for the seventh one, based on a couple of tweets,
05:00 which I don't think she deserves to be sacked for.
05:03 It's "Scream 6."
05:05 - Mm, yes.
05:06 - I didn't think it was bad,
05:11 but this is "Scream" we're talking about,
05:13 and "Scream 5" was pretty good.
05:15 So it's not this new director, or this new producer,
05:17 these new people who came on board have made a mess of it.
05:19 So Jack Quaid was excellent in "5."
05:21 They made, General Otega came into it.
05:24 I think they reignited it really well in the fifth one,
05:31 and for me, the sixth one wasn't as good as the fifth one,
05:34 and I'm really, really splitting hairs
05:36 because of the nearly 50 films I've seen this year,
05:38 I have not seen 10 bad films.
05:40 So I won't label it too much.
05:42 If you're gonna watch "Scream 6,"
05:43 you're probably gonna enjoy it still,
05:45 but if you're a "Scream" fanatic like me,
05:46 and film is subjective,
05:48 and this is a very subjective opinion,
05:50 I think it's the second worst of the franchise,
05:52 and considering I thought "4" and "5"
05:54 were some of the best, it's a bit of a disappointment.
05:57 So "Scream 6" is, it's in the list.
06:01 Go on, it's there.
06:02 - Yeah, average.
06:03 I would agree that it's a bit average.
06:04 My number nine is a genuinely bad film.
06:06 There's no doubt that it's a bad film,
06:07 but I quite enjoyed it.
06:08 It's playing with Gerald Butler.
06:10 So this is where Gerald Butler's Scottish accent is so bad
06:14 that at the start of the film,
06:15 they show that he's Scottish
06:17 'cause he has a conversation about haggis, neeps, and tatties
06:20 because they're so uncertain of his weird, mangled,
06:22 transatlantic accent.
06:24 - Must be Scottish.
06:25 - Must be Scottish 'cause it's haggis, neeps, and tatties.
06:28 It's a dreadful start to a dreadful film.
06:31 It's called "The Plane."
06:33 It takes place on a plane.
06:34 Most of it takes place on an island,
06:36 so it should've been called "The Island,"
06:37 but that title was already taken.
06:39 It's just a mess of a film, but it's quite fun.
06:42 It's Gerald running around the islands,
06:45 executing baddies.
06:46 At the end of it, he tries to act,
06:48 and it's such a hard thing to watch.
06:50 Trying to watch him genuinely try to emote
06:52 is like watching a chicken try to operate a computer.
06:55 It's just, it's a very strange concept.
06:58 So am I gonna watch it if it's on telly again?
07:00 Yes, I absolutely will.
07:02 Will I laugh at it?
07:02 I absolutely will, but it's a genuinely bad film.
07:04 But very close to the "So Bad" is quite an amusing category,
07:07 which we are fans of.
07:08 - You're gonna kick right off with this one.
07:11 - No, I'm not.
07:12 - You're gonna kick right off.
07:14 - But I just didn't like it.
07:16 I know people are gonna get mad about this,
07:20 but I was quite excited about it,
07:22 and then seeing it, I went, "All right."
07:24 But I'm gonna stipulate again, this just wasn't my taste.
07:28 I'm not gonna slate it.
07:31 It just wasn't my taste.
07:33 It didn't really do much for me.
07:34 I fell asleep sort of a little bit
07:36 'cause I was bored with it,
07:38 but I think most people are gonna absolutely love it.
07:41 It was a five out of 10 for me.
07:42 It's certainly not bad.
07:43 It's definitely a different idea.
07:45 You absolutely loved it.
07:47 It just didn't do anything for me.
07:49 It was, in my opinion, one of the worst films
07:51 in terms of my enjoyment levels,
07:53 but I'm aware and I understand it's probably a good movie.
07:56 It's just not my kind of thing,
07:58 or it didn't do much for me at the time.
08:00 Maybe I should re-watch it.
08:01 I don't know.
08:02 But like I said, I'm splitting hairs.
08:03 So number nine for me was "Marcel the Shell" with shoes on.
08:06 - That's fair enough.
08:08 I understand that it's divisive.
08:10 It was in my top 20.
08:10 It didn't quite make my top 10.
08:11 - I don't even think it would be that divisive.
08:13 I don't think it'd be that divisive.
08:14 I think most people will like it.
08:15 Just for me, I was like, I wanted something more.
08:19 And look, outside the death card for "Kiwi,"
08:21 I'm not that twee.
08:22 (laughing)
08:24 - And Emily.
08:25 - Is that twee anymore?
08:29 - Well, I don't know.
08:30 I don't know.
08:31 But no, fair enough, fair enough.
08:32 I can understand why some of you enjoy it,
08:35 because I think that it is quite twee,
08:36 and I think it is probably quite pleased
08:38 with itself as well.
08:39 So I do kind of understand that.
08:40 It is kind of not my sweet.
08:41 It is a film designed for twee-ers.
08:44 It's like, you're absolutely right.
08:46 I will let you have that,
08:46 but you're gonna be even angrier with me now.
08:49 Because my, where are we?
08:51 Eighth worst film of year is "Asteroid City."
08:55 So I love Wem Anderson.
08:56 I adore Wes Anderson.
08:58 I've loved all his films,
08:59 apart from "The Jar of Geeling Limited,"
09:00 which is an awful film.
09:01 - You don't deserve Wes Anderson at this rate.
09:03 - Well, this film is worse than "The Jar of Geeling Limited."
09:06 I wholeheartedly believe this.
09:09 Now, it made me laugh about five times.
09:11 You're right, the bit with the aliens, very funny.
09:13 I don't know what the film's about.
09:14 I don't know what the film's about.
09:16 It's got no plot whatsoever.
09:17 It's all over the place.
09:19 It has got this stupid play within a film,
09:23 within a TV series kind of magic box thing
09:27 that you love so much,
09:28 and it's all terribly clever,
09:29 and it looks beautiful.
09:31 But I just think it's got no soul whatsoever.
09:33 It didn't give me anything.
09:34 I didn't take anything away from it.
09:36 I think that Scarlett Johansson's nude scene
09:39 was completely unwarranted.
09:40 I don't know why he did it.
09:41 It felt out of place in the film.
09:43 And I think that it is the film that people don't,
09:46 lots of people don't like Wes Anderson.
09:47 Lots of people cannot stand any of his films.
09:50 This is the film that I think people who hate Wes Anderson
09:53 think all of his films are like.
09:54 It's like he's leading into his Wes Anderson-y-ness.
09:57 And I understand that if you really love Wes Anderson,
10:00 apparently I don't love him quite as much as you.
10:01 I do get that if you really love him
10:03 and all his tics and all the things he does,
10:05 this is a very Wes Anderson film.
10:07 And I don't think he's interested
10:09 in winning over new fans anymore,
10:10 which is fair enough, you know?
10:12 But I got very disappointed.
10:13 I was very disappointed.
10:14 I was massively excited about going to see it.
10:15 So it was probably, apart from one other film
10:18 I'm going to talk about,
10:19 it was the most disappointing film
10:20 that I've seen this year.
10:21 'Cause I came out, I didn't loathe it.
10:24 I just got very disappointed.
10:26 So my eighth worst film is "Asteroid City" by Wes Anderson.
10:31 - Dave is wrong.
10:32 Film is not subjective after all.
10:35 My number eight,
10:37 I think you're gonna be mad at me with this as well.
10:38 I really liked his last film,
10:40 but this one just didn't do much for me.
10:44 And I think a lot of it,
10:45 yeah, a lot of it comes down to the fact
10:47 I'm not really a big "Scarsguard" fan.
10:49 Like, and I felt like the film kind of told me stuff
10:54 that I already knew,
10:55 that rich people think they can do what they want
10:57 and just spend money and get away with it.
10:59 Oh, wow.
11:00 I would have never known that if you hadn't told me.
11:03 And it's got some really clever ideas
11:05 because the person who's made it, Brandon Cronenberg,
11:07 is obviously very clever.
11:08 He's come from an incredibly talented father.
11:12 And I think he'll go on to make films
11:15 that I love till kingdom come.
11:16 But I went to see this and was excited for it.
11:18 And it was parts of it that are really good.
11:20 There's parts where I was like,
11:21 "Oh, okay, this is decent."
11:23 But by the time it got to the bit
11:24 where Mia Goth gave me the ick,
11:27 when she goes, "Jamesy!"
11:29 Like, (gags)
11:31 like that just, for the rest of my, no, just no.
11:35 And I love Mia Goth.
11:37 "Infinity Pool," it just, it taught me nothing.
11:41 I've seen films that have had similarly good bits,
11:44 but are much better.
11:46 In a way, even though it's nothing like,
11:48 the plot's totally different to an extent.
11:52 It reminded me of like,
11:53 if the neon demon had been really average
11:57 and told you nothing whatsoever
11:58 about the superficial world of the rich.
12:00 Didn't really enjoy it.
12:04 But like I say, I think Brandon Cronenberg's film
12:06 beforehand, "Possessor," was absolutely phenomenal.
12:09 I think the stuff he'll make for the rest of his,
12:11 I think he'll make four good films
12:13 and then maybe one average one,
12:15 maybe one not so great one.
12:17 It's not a bad film.
12:18 I just thought it was a bit, "All right, okay."
12:21 Like I forgot it as soon as I came out.
12:23 - Yeah, I kind of, I mean,
12:24 it isn't actually in my top 20 of the year.
12:27 So I probably agree with you more
12:28 than I did when it first came out.
12:29 'Cause I was a big fan of it when it came out.
12:31 But actually looking back of it,
12:32 I do agree with you that it seems more disposable
12:34 than "Possessor," which like you say, it's a fantastic film.
12:37 So I don't entirely disagree with you about that one.
12:40 So my number seven is one that I think
12:43 will be on your list as well.
12:45 So we can both have a rant about it.
12:46 But Winnie the Pooh, "Blood and Money."
12:48 I mean, I can't believe it's only the seventh worst.
12:50 - "Blood and Money," not "Money."
12:52 - Oh, "Blood and Honey," I'm sorry.
12:54 - He didn't suddenly go from being like,
12:55 "Oh, I love "Honey" to being like,
12:56 "Oh, "Money," come on."
12:57 - "Blood and Honey," "Money."
12:58 (laughing)
13:00 I mean, we saw it as part of Fright Fest,
13:03 the big kind of horror film festival
13:04 that they have here in Glasgow.
13:05 It sold out really quickly.
13:06 Everyone is excited about it.
13:08 They're excited about seeing a Winnie the Pooh horror film.
13:11 And as you've said on many occasions,
13:13 it isn't a Winnie the Pooh horror film.
13:16 It is a horror film about a man
13:18 who puts on a very unconvincing Winnie the Pooh mask
13:20 and kills people.
13:21 - It's weird, I mean, I know this would be weird, right?
13:24 And I'm not saying that they should have done this,
13:25 but for a start, he's wearing pants.
13:28 - Yes.
13:29 - Winnie the Pooh doesn't wear pants.
13:30 - It's like calling Friday the 13th
13:32 ice hockey man murders because he's got an ice hockey mask on.
13:36 That is not the most important thing, you know?
13:39 So it's clearly named to get people into cinema.
13:43 Now this comes with a caveat
13:44 because when I went and see it as part of a film festival,
13:47 it was like the fourth film of the day or something.
13:48 I was not sober.
13:50 I really enjoyed it because all the cast and crew were there.
13:53 We clearly didn't like the film either.
13:54 And it was really funny.
13:55 It was good fun.
13:56 It was a great cinematic experience.
13:58 But I think had I seen the film sober,
13:59 I think I'd probably walked out of it
14:01 and I've got no urge to watch it yet.
14:02 So, I would not recommend anybody to watch it,
14:06 which is why it's on my list.
14:09 I mean, I would not recommend anybody
14:10 to watch any of the films on my list,
14:11 but certainly not Winnie the Pooh.
14:13 You'd have to be very bored to ever watch it again.
14:16 So that's my number 10 film.
14:17 It's awful.
14:18 - The director basically bottled comment, I think.
14:21 - Yeah, it wasn't really bottled.
14:22 - It was a line, but we were like, no, he's bottled it
14:23 'cause he knows it's awful.
14:25 And obviously it's funny because there was a lot of story
14:27 about how, well, how can you do a film about Winnie the Pooh
14:29 because of copyright and all that kind of stuff.
14:31 And it's because a hundred years has passed
14:32 and so on and so forth.
14:34 It's the short answer.
14:35 And there's nothing much more interesting after that.
14:37 But the cast all turned up
14:39 and the director of photography got the mic first
14:41 and he was like, just want to set expectations.
14:44 We had a really low budget on this before we even started.
14:47 And he's seen all the cast kind of going.
14:49 And I suppose it's a bit of a throwback to 80s music
14:54 where nude women were a big thing in the 80s
14:58 in horror movies for some reason.
14:59 But they even get to the point where he murders a woman
15:03 in a jacuzzi, but before he kills her,
15:06 he just takes a breath.
15:09 - Yeah, it's horrible.
15:11 It's horrible.
15:12 - What are you on that for?
15:13 And that killed it for me a little bit.
15:15 I don't wanna, look, film to film to film.
15:17 But there was a part of it
15:21 that was a little bit sexist as well.
15:23 And I was a bit like, ah, okay,
15:26 you haven't just used an old horror trope here
15:28 from the 80s, you've kind of gone like full on.
15:30 I just wanna put nudity in a film.
15:33 But forgetting all that, right,
15:35 'cause the next one on the list for me
15:36 is Winnie the Pooh, Blood and Honey.
15:38 Ironically, same movie.
15:39 I did weirdly enjoy it.
15:42 Had a pint, wasn't drunk, did weirdly enjoy it
15:44 because it was absolutely cack.
15:46 So I would recommend people do watch it
15:49 if you're going with the expectation.
15:50 But what made it funny was I think you went in
15:52 with the expectation that there was a bit hype around it.
15:54 It was absolutely right.
15:57 And then the guy gets the microphone and goes,
15:59 just wanna set expectations.
16:00 And you went, all right, okay.
16:02 And that sort of helped the experience
16:05 'cause you went, oh no, okay,
16:07 this is gonna be absolutely bobbins.
16:09 The stupidest thing about it,
16:13 if you watch the trailer, the plot,
16:15 and I wrote about this when it came out
16:17 'cause I was a bit excited.
16:18 I was like, ooh, okay.
16:19 The plot was that obviously,
16:21 Christopher Robin had left 100 Acre Lane
16:26 'cause he's not a child anymore
16:29 that believes in fake things
16:33 such as Piglet and Eeyore and all that kind of stuff.
16:37 And he comes back to show his new girlfriend
16:39 where he's been and then he gets terrorized.
16:41 That's not what happens.
16:43 - No. - Christopher Robin goes back,
16:46 realizes that Piglet's an absolute psychopath now,
16:49 finds the gravestone of Eeyore,
16:52 finds Winnie the Pooh, who's a man wearing
16:54 a Winnie the Pooh mask in dungarees.
16:56 - Yes. - Pants on,
16:58 nothing like Winnie the Pooh apart from a mask.
17:00 And the mask's not even that good.
17:01 Doesn't even look like Winnie the Pooh.
17:03 Piglet looks nothing like Piglet at all.
17:06 They basically chain him up and torture him
17:08 and kill his girlfriend.
17:09 And then you get introduced to a flock of women,
17:14 a flock of mid-20s sexy women
17:17 that randomly have turned up
17:19 in this nice little apartment place
17:21 where they all wanna live together.
17:23 And it's all a bit like,
17:25 look at all these good-looking women
17:26 that are gonna go in the jacuzzi in their bikinis.
17:29 And there's gonna be a big pig
17:30 and a big Winnie the Pooh that kills them.
17:35 So it's nothing about Christopher Robin.
17:37 - No, it's not. - Because the only time
17:39 Christopher Robin reappears is at the end
17:41 when he's getting like 12 lashions.
17:43 - Yes. - For no reason.
17:45 - It is absolutely awful.
17:47 One thing that they have succeeded in
17:48 to give them their due is that on IMDb,
17:51 it is officially the worst film of the year.
17:53 And that takes some doing.
17:56 And I think we'll get some views from that.
17:57 Just it is officially the worst film of the year.
17:59 They'll probably sell some DVDs with that.
18:01 - I think it could.
18:02 Don't pay for it.
18:05 But I think it could end up being a bit like "The Room"
18:08 in terms of notoriety 'cause it is so bad.
18:12 And it should really be higher on the list.
18:14 But there was things that I enjoyed less.
18:17 But this I enjoyed-- - I enjoyed the experience.
18:19 I agree. - Just because it was awful.
18:23 So I'll go with my number six
18:24 'cause I've given the seven away anyway.
18:25 We'll flip it back around.
18:27 Again, this is a film I didn't dislike.
18:31 I just thought its premise was great.
18:34 And the film wasn't very good.
18:36 It wasn't very bad.
18:38 And I feel bad putting it above
18:39 "Winnie the Pooh, Blood and Honey,"
18:40 but I enjoyed it less than "Winnie the Pooh, Blood and Honey"
18:44 'cause it wasn't that funny.
18:45 And its premise was excellent.
18:47 But the blackening.
18:49 - Yeah, I didn't see it.
18:49 Don't wanna see it.
18:51 I read it, the premise is great.
18:53 It should have been really good and it just wasn't.
18:56 And that's really all I can say about it,
18:59 which probably explains why it's so high up.
19:02 I just didn't think it was that good.
19:04 - Well, similarly, my number six,
19:06 which is another horror film,
19:07 and it actually also got shown as part of Fright Fest,
19:09 which is not to be bad about Fright Fest
19:10 'cause all the other films were very good.
19:12 There was 12 films, only two bad ones.
19:14 And like I said-- - One got in my top 10
19:16 for the best as well. - Absolutely, yeah.
19:18 Yeah, yeah.
19:19 So it was a really good Fright Fest,
19:20 but there's always one kind of boring film in Fright Fest.
19:23 And this year, the boring film was 13 Exorcisms.
19:26 It's just-- - How was that?
19:28 - It's about, you know what it's about.
19:30 A girl goes to a seance and gets possessed,
19:32 and then she needs to be exorcised.
19:34 But oh, shock, it's such a bad demon,
19:36 she needs to be exorcised 13 times for some reason.
19:39 It's completely derivative.
19:40 It's like all these other films that you've seen.
19:42 You know the films that it's like.
19:44 It takes things a lot from all these other films.
19:45 It doesn't add anything to the mythology
19:48 or to the kind of canon of exorcism movies.
19:51 And frankly, in a world where this year
19:54 we had the Pokes exorcist, it shouldn't have even existed,
19:57 because that did give us something new
19:59 to that genre of film.
20:00 So it was just boring.
20:02 - I give so much to film, Dave.
20:03 You've underplayed that.
20:05 The Pokes exorcist gave so much to film.
20:08 - I agree, I agree.
20:09 Well, if I tell you that in the 13 Exorcisms,
20:11 I think I saw about four of them,
20:13 'cause I napped the rest of the time.
20:14 And the dreams I had while napping
20:16 were far scarier than anything happens on the screen.
20:18 It's just no point to that.
20:19 It's just a pointless film.
20:20 So number six for me, 13 Exorcisms.
20:23 - I did have tickets for that, but I ended up,
20:27 I can't remember what was happening.
20:27 I think I was at the football next thing, didn't I?
20:29 I'm going, but it's got 33% on Rotten Tomatoes.
20:33 And it's a foreign film, isn't it?
20:35 It's not English.
20:36 - It's like, it's Spanish, I think, yeah.
20:39 - Yeah, so it's called 13 Exorcismos.
20:41 - Ah, yeah, yeah.
20:42 - I'm sure I pronounced it incorrectly,
20:44 but God, exorcism sounds sexy when you say it.
20:46 - It's a Spanish accent.
20:47 So my number five, again, it's a franchise I really like,
20:54 and I think has been really good throughout.
20:59 This one just added nothing to it.
21:01 Insidious, The Red Door.
21:03 Rubbish, to be honest.
21:06 Based on how good the previous films were.
21:09 And it's from Patrick Wilson directed this one.
21:11 So the main actor in the films, as people will know,
21:16 is him, and he's gone back to,
21:19 it's kind of like the first one.
21:21 So the first one is where the kid goes into a coma,
21:24 but he's actually being possessed
21:26 because he's gone into a different world.
21:28 A really, really good film up until the end, basically,
21:34 when it kind of skews off a bit,
21:35 but it's been a really good franchise.
21:37 I think it's kind of stood the test of time as well.
21:41 It's done really well.
21:43 The fifth one's from a different director.
21:45 I don't think James Wan's had anything to do with this one,
21:47 and the director is actually Patrick Wilson.
21:49 And it's kind of gone into the future 20 years in advance
21:52 because they had to make them forget everything
21:55 that happened in the first one a bit,
21:56 like Men in Black, you'll forget everything after this.
22:01 And then the kid, Dalton, who was, I think,
22:04 six or something at the time when he did the first Insidious,
22:06 is now older, and he's at college,
22:11 and he starts sort of half remembering stuff
22:14 that happened to him.
22:15 But the kid is an awful actor, in my opinion.
22:19 I mean, it was kind of like,
22:23 it was kind of like watching Kevin and Perry
22:27 with his tantrums.
22:28 No, I don't wanna go into the other world.
22:31 I can't be bothered.
22:32 I just wanna paint.
22:33 And it just, it wasn't sold to me.
22:36 And again, it went ridiculous
22:38 before it needed to go ridiculous.
22:40 It hasn't been very well received.
22:43 It hasn't added anything, like at all, to the franchise.
22:48 And the first 45 minutes is actually not bad,
22:53 but to be honest with you, not great.
22:56 However, not everyone will agree.
22:59 There's one review on Google that says,
23:02 "Insidious the Red Door,"
23:03 all capitalized this, by the way, in the first letter,
23:07 "Insidious the Red Door was a mesmerizing moving picture,
23:10 "very graphical and entertaining."
23:12 (laughing)
23:13 "I am fortunate to have such a positive outlook on life
23:16 "because I was discouraged from going to see this
23:18 "and there's so many negative comments,
23:20 "but this person loved it."
23:22 Well, some people might like it.
23:24 - Can I just say, not everyone's a film critic,
23:26 I think it's fair to say.
23:28 (laughing)
23:29 I've not seen it, nor is Sasiata either.
23:30 I'm not gonna go into that.
23:32 - We've called it,
23:33 not everyone's a film podcast review thing, majig,
23:38 because we're not.
23:41 (laughing)
23:41 - We're just men, just normal men.
23:44 - We're just two idiots talking about films,
23:46 there's nothing wrong about that.
23:48 - We're just innocent men.
23:50 - We are just innocent men.
23:51 My number five, and what a year it is,
23:54 that there are four worst films in "Cocaine Bear,"
23:56 but in my opinion,
23:57 there are four worst films this year in "Cocaine Bear."
23:59 I'm presuming "Cocaine Bear" might be on your list as well.
24:02 It's a title that made everyone go to cinema.
24:04 I was excited about it.
24:05 The trailer was absolutely brilliant.
24:07 (snorting)
24:08 The first wee bit, when you first see the bear on cocaine,
24:10 it's very funny,
24:10 but you can't really stretch that out for the whole film.
24:13 It's a film that should be so bad it's good.
24:15 They clearly designed it to be so bad that it's good,
24:18 but it's not, it's just boring,
24:19 and it gets very, very boring very, very quickly.
24:21 There's no real plot.
24:22 There's a couple of quite nice gory bits in it,
24:25 but the bear doesn't look right by the end.
24:27 There's some really poor CGI and stuff,
24:29 and it's just not a very good film.
24:32 And it's irritating,
24:33 'cause I think we said back when it was released
24:35 that it probably made a decent amount of money,
24:37 and that's just gonna encourage people to watch it.
24:40 To put a stupid title on a film, put no money into it,
24:42 put no love into it.
24:43 There's no love in this film.
24:44 It looks like it's been written by AI
24:46 to try to get people in cinema.
24:47 And I just found it a pretty depressing experience.
24:49 But I was excited about it again.
24:51 Came out just going, "Ugh."
24:53 So "Cocaine Bear" is my number five.
24:55 - I'll come back to that.
24:57 My number four,
25:00 I think you really like this,
25:03 but you'll be able to tell me if you do or not,
25:06 'cause I think I might be wrong with it.
25:09 I don't know.
25:09 Again, it's a high level of disappointment
25:14 for something I thought was gonna be really good
25:17 and wasn't.
25:18 "Renfield."
25:21 - Yeah, I thought it was all right.
25:24 I thought it was quite fun.
25:25 - No.
25:27 - No, no, it's been up.
25:28 I can see why.
25:28 I do always think,
25:29 that is not a hill that I would die on.
25:31 I would not defend "Renfield" to any great amount.
25:34 I've actually forgotten about it.
25:35 It's one of these films I find quite forgettable.
25:37 Although that was the main performance
25:39 of "Nicolas Cage" was always good.
25:40 - But that's the thing,
25:41 "Cage" was all right in it,
25:42 but you've got "Cage."
25:43 I've changed my hat twice in this,
25:44 and took my hat off twice, by the way.
25:47 I was hoping people would notice that.
25:48 "Cage" as "Dracula,"
25:52 there you go.
25:55 That should sell.
25:57 And it doesn't.
25:58 I thought the kind of comic-y gore was pretty good.
26:03 The comic-y, but that's gonna be three quid in HMB
26:08 within months.
26:09 Just not a fan.
26:12 Didn't think it was very good.
26:14 "Cage" was great, but when is he not?
26:16 But you've got so much more potential with the actors
26:19 that are within that film,
26:21 and it was just a bit of pants.
26:23 - No, I generally agree with you.
26:25 I think I liked it a bit more,
26:26 just 'cause I loved "Nicolas Cage" in it so much.
26:28 But there could be more "Nicolas Cage,"
26:29 less "Nicolas Holt," and yeah.
26:31 It was just an all right film.
26:33 It was an all right film.
26:34 - That's a good way to look at life, I think.
26:36 More "Cage," less "Nicolas Holt."
26:38 - Yeah, 'cause I don't think he's a bad actor,
26:40 "Nicolas Holt," but he looks exactly like
26:42 one of my childhood best friends,
26:43 like to the point where it's terrifying.
26:45 - That's all pretty.
26:47 - Yeah, 'cause we had a few arguments
26:49 towards the end of our friendship.
26:51 So when I look at him, I go,
26:52 "Oh, you don't remember that time."
26:54 And I'm like, "Hang on a minute, that's not him."
26:56 - Just shows it's all subjective, particularly in that.
27:00 Well, my number, we're doing quite well here.
27:02 We're down to number four.
27:05 It's a film called "Eileen."
27:06 It's actually just out now.
27:08 I saw it's Marvel. - Oh, really?
27:09 I wanted to go see it.
27:10 - It's got some really good reviews.
27:11 A lot of people really liked it.
27:13 I really did not like it.
27:15 The plot, Anne Hathaway's brilliant in it.
27:17 She's a kind of sexy psychologist
27:19 who goes and works in a bar still.
27:22 And when she arrives there,
27:23 there's this younger woman called Eileen,
27:26 played by Thomasin McKenzie, who's also really unique.
27:29 And she kind of becomes obsessed with this very sexy,
27:32 very glamorous, very intelligent psychologist.
27:35 And there's a lot of-
27:37 - I wonder why.
27:38 (laughs)
27:38 - A sexy, glamorous Anne Hathaway.
27:41 What could possibly have got me interested in her?
27:45 Hmm, was it her personality?
27:47 - It was, well, she's got a great personality as well.
27:49 - I don't know, I don't know.
27:51 - But there's lots of sparks between them.
27:52 And it's a really interesting star.
27:54 And you see the obsession and everything else.
27:56 And the film trots along really nicely.
27:58 It's really interesting.
27:58 You don't know where it's going.
28:00 And then something happens.
28:01 I'm not going to spoil it
28:02 because it is out in the cinema still.
28:03 But there's a plot twist about two thirds of the way
28:05 through it, and it's so stupid.
28:07 And I don't understand why the glowing reviews,
28:09 'cause there's been lots of glowing reviews for it,
28:11 none point out how this plot twist,
28:13 it is so inane and daft and ridiculous
28:16 that it completely lost me.
28:18 And I just couldn't focus on the rest of the film.
28:19 So I'm just going, why did they do that?
28:21 And so for the last third, I just think,
28:23 I dislike this film.
28:24 Now, the issue with it is that apparently the book,
28:27 which it's based on, has got this plot twist.
28:29 So I don't think there's much they can do about it.
28:30 But I think the book's an awful book as well.
28:31 And I think they made an awful film out of an awful book.
28:33 And it's a shame 'cause the direction's good as well.
28:35 It looks lovely, the acting's brilliant,
28:37 but the plot is just stupid.
28:39 And I cannot cope with a plot that stupid in a film
28:42 that starts off quite seriously and quite interestingly,
28:44 and it's got lots of nuance.
28:46 And then they just do something hyper dramatic
28:49 for no apparent reason and it wrecks it.
28:51 So my least favorite film of the year is Ivy.
28:55 - Well, that kind of helps me not go and see that then,
28:58 'cause I was kind of into it.
28:59 I was like, oh, entry.
29:00 - Well, you still go and see it.
29:02 Lots of people disagree with me.
29:03 Lots of people disagree with me.
29:04 Not as much as my next pick's gonna have people
29:06 disagreeing with me, but anyway.
29:08 - Number three for me,
29:10 the end scene that made me giggle like now else.
29:15 It hasn't made me giggle more than anything this year.
29:16 We know that Nicolas Cage farting
29:19 at the time of a lady stroking his leg
29:22 is potentially the funniest thing I've ever seen in cinema,
29:24 which is in "Dream Scenario,"
29:28 which I thought was an all right film,
29:29 but that's, you know, whatever.
29:31 And go see it.
29:33 That bit's really funny.
29:35 But this film, I don't know.
29:37 I kind of went to see it.
29:39 Trailer, decent, but in the back of my mind,
29:42 I knew exactly what it was gonna be.
29:44 And I was like, oh, for God's sake,
29:45 you are exactly what I thought you were gonna be.
29:48 And I just don't think it's a film
29:49 that had too much thought behind it.
29:50 And like, there's points where like,
29:53 it's actually like disgusting and not in a funny way,
29:56 but strays.
29:57 - I didn't see that either.
29:59 Again, not interested.
30:01 - Look, disclaimer here,
30:03 but there's a point where for some reason,
30:05 the fun was funny.
30:07 The dogs get locked in jail
30:08 because that's what happens these days.
30:09 Dogs get put in jail.
30:11 They put one dog in jail,
30:14 and I think it's a Doberman.
30:16 And the guard falls asleep.
30:18 And the way to try and get the keys back from the guard
30:22 is for, how do I put this on a podcast for the Scotsman?
30:26 For the dog to get aroused to try and get the keys.
30:30 And it just isn't funny.
30:32 It's a bit disturbing.
30:34 And I'm like, what have you done?
30:36 Like, the ending seems quite funny.
30:40 Like, because they've mashed it together quite well,
30:44 but it feels like an idea that they had.
30:47 And they went, yeah, that'll be great.
30:48 And then started filming and they went,
30:50 ah, what do we do after the idea?
30:53 Well, just put loads of stupid jokes in.
30:55 And Will Ferrell and Jamie Foxx are the voices of it,
30:57 so there's money in it.
30:59 And Will Ferrell makes me giggle like anything.
31:01 Like, I really like Will Ferrell.
31:02 He really makes me giggle.
31:03 I find his brand of humor hilarious.
31:05 And "Stepbrothers" is the most funniest film
31:07 I've ever seen in my life, period.
31:09 But "Strays" is just absolutely cack.
31:13 - Yeah, no, I saw the trailer many times.
31:16 I think the trailer's very funny,
31:17 but that's clearly all the funny stuff in the trailer.
31:19 - Yeah.
31:19 - Like that, when you're watching the trailer,
31:20 you go, I don't need to see that film.
31:23 - 100% correct.
31:24 - You can deal with that without even seeing it.
31:27 - Yeah.
31:28 Now, my third worst film of the year
31:30 is somewhat controversial.
31:31 It's "Killers of the Flower Moon."
31:33 Now, it's a masterpiece.
31:35 Matt Ascorsese's done it again.
31:37 Oh, Leonardo DiCaprio's amazing.
31:39 No, no, no.
31:40 It is a mess of a film.
31:42 It's three and a half hours.
31:44 Leonardo DiCaprio, who I think is by far
31:46 the finest actor of his generation,
31:48 arguably the best actor of all time.
31:50 He's probably got the most impressive filmography
31:52 of any actor who's ever lived.
31:54 I think he's borderline terrible in this.
31:56 He mugs the entire time.
31:59 He pretends to be this idiot,
32:01 this grinning idiot all the way through.
32:03 There's no indication about why Lily Gladstone's character
32:08 has any interest in him.
32:10 He admits he's a gold digger.
32:12 He's an idiot.
32:13 He's stupid.
32:14 And yet, apparently, she falls in love with him.
32:16 Why? I don't know.
32:17 Apparently, what happened in this film
32:19 is that the main character in the book
32:22 is Jesse Plemons, FBI agent.
32:25 And apparently, what the book does
32:26 is that it follows the investigation.
32:28 Leonardo DiCaprio's character is not a major part in the book.
32:32 But apparently, Leonardo DiCaprio,
32:34 who was going to play Jesse Plemons' character,
32:36 said, "I quite fancy playing him.
32:38 And could you make the role bigger for me?"
32:39 So he changed the book completely.
32:40 And I think it shows in the film.
32:42 I did not understand a lot of the film when I watched it.
32:46 I had to read up about it
32:47 to understand why some things were happening.
32:49 Even the title isn't fully explained.
32:52 I think Martin Scorsese needed 10 hours
32:54 of a TV series to do this justice.
32:56 And I think that what he left in wasn't the right stuff.
32:59 Now, I'm not saying it doesn't look great.
33:00 I'm not saying Robert De Niro's not great.
33:02 I'm not saying Lili Ladspa's not great.
33:04 There's lots of great stuff in it.
33:05 Don't get me wrong.
33:06 There's some amazing scenes in it.
33:07 Don't get me wrong.
33:08 But I just don't think that the film's much caught.
33:11 And I think the final scene,
33:13 which has got Martin Scorsese in it,
33:16 is one of the most self-reverential bits of claptrap
33:19 I've ever seen.
33:20 It's insufferably smug.
33:22 And I genuinely wanted to punch myself in the face
33:25 at that point, 'cause I got through this film.
33:27 And then they add that bit at the end,
33:29 which is basically him saying,
33:29 "I'm very clever and I care a lot.
33:32 "And I want you to know I care a lot."
33:34 And I thought it was awful.
33:34 I came out of the cinema and I was quite angry.
33:37 So my third worst film of the year,
33:38 even though it's gonna get Oscars,
33:40 even though everyone says I'm wrong,
33:41 is "Killers of the Claremoon."
33:42 And I'm gonna read the books.
33:43 Apparently the book's much better.
33:45 - I thought it was, actually, I liked it.
33:47 And I really liked the end of it as well.
33:50 But if you'd asked me about best Scorsese films,
33:52 I'd probably put about four or five ahead of it,
33:54 quite easily.
33:56 But I really liked Scorsese, but for me,
33:58 he'll never, ever touch the sides of anything
34:01 since "Shutter Island" and "The Departed."
34:03 For me, that's just period.
34:05 Agree on DiCaprio, best of his generation,
34:07 potentially the best ever.
34:09 That is not a subjective opinion.
34:11 The fact that we both agree,
34:13 meaning that it is a correct opinion.
34:15 - Yeah, you just need to look at his films.
34:17 He's got a run of like 25 or 30 films,
34:19 all of them are excellent.
34:20 No one's ever done that before.
34:22 - He's absolutely unreal.
34:23 Like his performance on "Wolf of Wall Street"
34:25 will always make me laugh.
34:26 And if it's on, I'll sit and go, right, okay,
34:29 I'm watching it.
34:30 And it's on a lot.
34:31 Like "Wolf of Wall Street" is on a lot,
34:32 and I always watch it.
34:33 But anyway, you're gonna hate me for number two,
34:37 love the director, love everything that he's done.
34:40 He loved the main actor.
34:42 Absolutely love every single person
34:45 that's involved with this film across the board.
34:48 Think they are generational talents
34:50 that will make the best films you've ever seen
34:54 in time to come.
34:54 And he made one that to this day,
34:57 I find uncomfortable and mesmerizing to watch,
35:00 and I love it so much.
35:01 But this was just absolute crap.
35:06 For three hours, it went absolutely nowhere.
35:10 I can take that the first hour is all right.
35:14 And it's a very good way of summing up how anxiety feels.
35:17 And trust me, I would know this.
35:19 But the first hour is just not good enough
35:23 to make the rest of the absolute bobbins that it is.
35:26 That just makes no sense.
35:27 It's so far up its own backside.
35:30 It's coming out of its mouth.
35:32 Like, "Boys Afraid" is an awful film.
35:36 - Oh, that's controversial.
35:37 I think that's more controversial.
35:39 - Absolutely terrible.
35:42 Like, look, you're not telling me anything.
35:45 "Midsommar" was amazing.
35:46 "Midsommar" was so good, hereditary.
35:49 Oh, man.
35:51 But this is his, "I'm not gonna just do horror anymore."
35:54 It's trying to be too intelligent without doing anything.
35:58 And it's been a long time since I've been in a cinema
36:01 and I've turned around to someone.
36:03 Even with all these other films I've seen in the cinema,
36:04 including "Winnie the Pooh,"
36:06 been a long time since I've looked at a cinema,
36:08 I've been in a cinema and turned around to whoever I'm with,
36:11 which was my fiancee at the time, and went,
36:13 "Should we just go home?"
36:15 And she said, "No, we're gonna see this out
36:18 because I feel like it's gonna be character building."
36:21 Now, that is not what you want from a film.
36:23 I was so disappointed, so, so disappointed,
36:28 'cause I think Joaquin Phoenix is up there
36:29 with DiCaprio, I rate Joaquin so, so highly.
36:33 I love him, I think he's brilliant.
36:35 I think he's one of the best people
36:37 that's ever existed on the planet.
36:39 "I'm Still Here" is a genius piece of work
36:42 and it's artistry at its best,
36:43 based on everything that he went through
36:46 to do the movie/documentary about his rap career.
36:50 I think he's unbelievable in "Joker."
36:52 I think he's fabulous in "Gladiator."
36:53 I don't think there's anything I've really seen him in.
36:56 "The Master," brilliant, and I'm aware that one's
36:58 a bit of a difficult one to watch for some people.
37:01 I think "Ariaster's," I think "Midsommar"
37:03 is an absolute masterpiece.
37:05 But my God, "Boze Afraid" just disappears so far,
37:08 it's on backside, it comes out of its mouth.
37:10 Don't do that again.
37:12 Do what you got at.
37:13 You don't need to be super duper clever.
37:15 You don't need to send a message with every single film.
37:17 Just get back to doing what you do normally.
37:19 I know some people loved it, I did not.
37:22 - I certainly did love it,
37:23 but I would say that I never want to see it again.
37:25 I found it a very stressful experience
37:27 being in the cinema, watching it.
37:28 And I've got nowhere to see it again.
37:29 I think it's a brilliant film,
37:30 but it's not a crowd pleaser.
37:32 It's not one that I would have on DVD or anything.
37:33 So I do agree. - No.
37:35 - No way. - No.
37:37 - So my second, and again, it's amazing
37:39 that this isn't the worst film of the year,
37:41 "The Marvels," which is the latest Marvel film.
37:43 - Ooh.
37:44 - Now I love "Captain Marvel," I love "Miss Marvel."
37:46 I've done all the homework.
37:47 You need to have watched about six different TV programs,
37:50 about 12 different films to even understand this film.
37:52 I still don't understand this film.
37:54 A bit like "Ant-Man and the Wasp of Quantumania."
37:57 I just don't understand any of the plot.
37:58 It is like they've recorded 20 hours of film
38:01 and then just cut it and forgotten any of the bits of plot.
38:03 It's got weird set pieces.
38:05 I genuinely do not think that anybody can watch it
38:07 and tell me what it's about.
38:08 It's an absolute mess.
38:10 Brie Larson doesn't look like she wants to be there,
38:13 which is totally understandable.
38:15 And it's just excruciating.
38:17 It's really excruciating.
38:18 There's one very funny bit with cats in it
38:20 that almost saves it,
38:22 but it's balanced out by one of the most excruciating scenes
38:25 of the year, where they visit a planet
38:27 where people communicate by singing, and it is awful.
38:30 It's like the worst episodes of "Star Trek Next Generation"
38:34 combined with the worst Marvel film.
38:36 It's awful.
38:37 I absolutely hated it.
38:38 I came out of the cinema properly angry,
38:40 and I genuinely think I might not go
38:42 and see a Marvel film again,
38:43 having watched every Marvel film
38:44 that's ever been in the cinema,
38:46 apart from "Spider-Man," I think that I'm done with them
38:48 because I've seen two really bad ones this year,
38:50 and I don't want to any more.
38:51 So "The Marvels" is the worst Marvel film
38:53 that's ever been made, I think,
38:54 and it's my second worst film of the year.
38:56 - In terms of the worst film, we've discussed it already.
39:01 You were right, it was on my list.
39:03 I'll keep it short and sweet
39:04 'cause we've discussed it at length.
39:05 Mine is "Cocaine Bear,"
39:07 because it does nothing other than what it says on the tin,
39:10 and it's not that funny.
39:11 It's nothing like what happened in real life,
39:14 and it's just based on a true story.
39:16 Yes, they found the bear's carcass
39:17 after it ate like seven duffel bags of cocaine,
39:20 'cause you know what happens
39:21 when you eat seven duffel bags of cocaine?
39:23 You turn into a corpse.
39:25 Your body cannot take that.
39:27 None of that happened.
39:29 The bear didn't just randomly go in a bit of a,
39:32 "Oh, I'm gonna hug a tree."
39:33 The joke was just so played out.
39:36 And do you know why it's getting my number one?
39:40 I had a bit of a battle with this in "Bo's Afraid,"
39:43 but that's really Oita's last film.
39:46 Moment of silence for that.
39:51 (Oita laughs)
39:52 - RIP.
39:53 It's awful, isn't it?
39:55 - I mean, what a great, amazing, legendary, iconic actor
39:59 that I really wish that he didn't die.
40:04 - Yes.
40:05 - He's amazing.
40:06 He will be remembered forever for his role in "Goodfellas,"
40:10 but my God, what a collection of films,
40:12 and they put him in that.
40:14 - Yeah, it's awful.
40:15 - Oh, I hope he was paid well.
40:16 I hope that he got loads of money for that,
40:18 because he really deserves it,
40:19 because his career is so good,
40:21 and that shouldn't be anywhere near it.
40:23 Load of absolute waffle.
40:25 - Well, I absolutely agree,
40:26 and it could easily have been my number one,
40:28 but my number one,
40:29 and I'm gonna keep it very short and sweet,
40:30 so I don't wanna give it the option of publicity.
40:32 I'd actually forgotten this existed until I looked back.
40:35 It's like my brain has blocked it out.
40:37 It hates it so much.
40:38 It just refuses to even accept that this film exists,
40:42 and it's "Indiana Jones" and "The Dial of Destiny."
40:45 It's "Indiana Jones," time-traveling.
40:48 It's like they're just going,
40:49 "We can't be bothers anymore.
40:50 Will this do?
40:51 Let's just do time travel."
40:53 Last time, with "Kingdom of the Crystal Skull,"
40:55 they said, "We can't be bothers anymore.
40:57 Let's have aliens in it.
40:59 This time, we can't be bothers anymore.
41:01 Let's time travel."
41:02 It's horrific.
41:03 It's such a bad film.
41:04 It was set in Glasgow.
41:05 Everyone's very excited about this.
41:07 I went to see it in the cinema on Renfrew Street,
41:09 which is literally, you can see where a part of it was filmed.
41:12 I went down to see the set when they were doing it.
41:14 I loved "Indiana Jones" when I was wee.
41:16 I think the first two, well,
41:18 the first film and the third film are both classics,
41:20 and it's just awful.
41:22 It's just awful.
41:23 The plot makes no sense whatsoever,
41:26 and everything about it is bad.
41:28 I can't think of anything positive about it whatsoever.
41:31 - That's quite interesting.
41:33 - Phoebe Walder-Bridge, who I find fantastic,
41:35 I think she's a great actress.
41:36 I mean, she's arguably the worst thing in it.
41:38 She's awful.
41:39 She looks like she's won a competition to be in the film.
41:41 She doesn't look like she should be there at all.
41:44 And "Indiana Jones" himself, like Harrison Ford, legend,
41:47 he's quite awful.
41:48 I mean, he is quite awful.
41:49 You're talking about Michael Douglas.
41:50 He should be put out to pasture.
41:51 There's not gonna be another "Indiana Jones" film,
41:53 I think it's fair to say,
41:54 because he still looks good for his age,
41:56 but it was just a money-making thing,
41:59 and it died at the box office,
42:00 and I'm really happy it did.
42:01 I think it's actually lost money.
42:03 I think that shows people have got sense,
42:04 and I'm happy about that.
42:06 But that is my worst film of the year.
42:08 - I kind of completely forget that it's a thing,
42:12 to be honest with you.
42:13 'Cause yeah, I remember going when it was filmed and stuff,
42:18 but I had no real interest in it.
42:20 - I don't think anyone did,
42:21 and they were right to not have interest in it,
42:22 'cause it was rubbish.
42:23 - It kind of solidifies my thoughts on the whole thing.
42:26 That's our 20 worst films of the year.
42:30 - Amazing.
42:31 - If you've done the 40 minutes, fair crack.
42:33 I hope we've been entertaining for you
42:34 rather than just being like, "Aah!"
42:37 Which seems like I progressively got more like that
42:40 as I changed hats.
42:41 But Dave, thanks for joining.
42:44 - Pleasure's ever.
42:46 - As much as we've gone through bad films,
42:48 let's hope for an equally as good film year next year,
42:50 because the fact that I had to put some films in
42:52 that I actually didn't hate to this list
42:54 is very much a positive,
42:55 'cause if I'm looking through that list,
42:58 there is generally,
43:00 half of them I thought were really bad,
43:02 half of them I'd probably be watching a plane
43:03 up and flying on a long haul flight again.
43:06 - And I hated all of mine.
43:08 - Which means 15 bad films in a year is not too bad.
43:12 Thanks for joining.
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43:15 Do what you can do, share it.
43:17 Share it.
43:18 - Yeah, why not?
43:19 - If you want, or don't share it if you don't.
43:21 Thanks for joining.
43:22 See you next week.
43:23 Bye.
43:24 - You're mine.
43:25 (upbeat music)
43:27 (upbeat music)
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