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00:34 Papa didn't come home yet, huh?
00:36 No, you know how busy barbershops are on Saturday.
00:39 He probably had to wait his turn.
00:41 Why don't you leave this lunch on the table?
00:43 I did already.
00:44 Cold cuts.
00:46 All right, Rosalie, put on your top one.
00:47 Let's go.
00:48 Ma, do I have to go?
00:50 Yes, you have to go.
00:51 You have to help me.
00:52 This is not the Bronx where I can be delivered.
00:54 Please.
00:56 Tell Samli to-- to get a car out of the garage.
00:59 Let me see what I need now.
01:01 If I marked everything pickles.
01:03 I marked pillowcases.
01:07 And toothpaste I have to put down.
01:10 That Uncle David mowing the lawn?
01:12 He is.
01:14 He never gives the grass a chance to grow.
01:16 Who mows the lawn every day?
01:18 [doorbell]
01:19 See who's ringing, yeah?
01:21 Yes?
01:22 Is the lady of the house in?
01:23 Ma, it's for you.
01:24 Yes?
01:25 Mrs. Goldberg?
01:27 Yes?
01:28 I'm from the Treasury Book Corporation, madam.
01:30 I have a wonderful--
01:31 Well, don't let me interrupt.
01:32 I'm sorry, but we already have the book of knowledge
01:34 from A to Z.
01:35 Ah, but this isn't that kind of a book, madam.
01:38 Allow me to show you.
01:39 This little treasury book is worth $50 in free merchandise.
01:43 And the cost to you is only an insignificant sum of $3.98.
01:48 Remarkable.
01:49 What kind of merchandise?
01:51 Well, let's take a peek into our little treasury book,
01:53 shall we?
01:54 Here we are.
01:55 One free shampoo, courtesy of Yvonne's Beauty Salon,
01:58 worth $1.50.
02:00 Free?
02:01 Free.
02:02 One shoot dry clean, free of charge,
02:04 courtesy of Lake's Laundry, worth $1.00.
02:07 Also free?
02:10 One free admission to the Haveville Drive-In Theater,
02:12 worth $0.85.
02:14 And that's with Cinemascope and Stereophonic Sound, et cetera,
02:17 et cetera, et cetera.
02:19 All the et ceteras are free?
02:21 Absolutely free.
02:23 $50 worth.
02:25 Oh, my.
02:26 How can they afford to do such a thing?
02:29 Well, it's an advertising campaign, you see.
02:32 It's a way of getting the newcomers acquainted
02:34 with the local merchants.
02:35 What you pay merely covers the cost of printing
02:37 and our small commission for sponsoring the campaign.
02:41 Look, Rosalie, one stimulated wristband, retail value $2.
02:47 Wonderful.
02:48 Well, I'll take one.
02:49 Why not?
02:51 Very nice.
02:53 $4.
02:55 That's two--
02:56 $2.
02:57 --three, one, four.
02:59 Well, thank you, madam.
03:00 And here's your $0.02 change.
03:03 Thank you very much.
03:05 Thank you.
03:05 Good day.
03:06 Good day.
03:07 Good day, young lady.
03:09 Good day.
03:09 Good day.
03:12 Molly, Molly here.
03:14 David, we're going to town to shop.
03:16 If you're going, come.
03:17 Ma, look, a pure Italian silk scarf.
03:21 And free.
03:24 Wait, Molly, Phil will tell you.
03:26 It's time to show Mama what I bought.
03:28 Look, Ma, it's a treasury book that--
03:30 You two?
03:32 The man with the mustache?
03:34 Yes, isn't it?
03:38 Hello, hello, hello.
03:39 Hello, Jake dear.
03:41 Hello, darling.
03:43 Jake, darling, the day is fleeting and flying,
03:45 and I didn't do my marketing yet.
03:46 I laid you out on the table cold.
03:48 So help yourself, and I have to go.
03:50 Molly, the funniest thing happened to me at the barbershop.
03:54 You leave the story until I return.
03:55 Yes, Jake, please.
03:56 This is known as a treasury book.
03:58 And what is this?
04:00 And this also?
04:03 A man with a mustache?
04:05 Oh, is he a salesman?
04:08 $150 worth of merchandise, absolutely free.
04:11 Well, isn't that wonderful?
04:13 [music playing]
04:17 Is this the Allied Garage?
04:19 This is Mr. Goldberg.
04:21 I was wondering if I could bring my car in for a greasing.
04:25 No, no, I'm not a regular customer.
04:28 But I own treasury book coupons, and I
04:30 believe you honor those.
04:32 Well, fine, as soon as my family returns with a car.
04:36 Any minute.
04:37 Uh-huh.
04:38 Thank you.
04:40 [music playing]
04:43 Hi.
04:44 Jake, I'm home.
04:47 Oh, am I tired.
04:49 If I don't take my feet off.
04:51 Oh.
04:53 You're tired, David, aren't you?
04:55 Well, a little, a little tired.
04:57 What took you so long, Molly?
04:58 Oh, Jake, did we have a wonderful day?
05:00 I'll wait and you see.
05:02 You'll show me later, Rosalie.
05:04 The garage is reserving a lift for me.
05:05 I'm getting a free grease job from the treasury book.
05:08 I'll be back in a half an hour.
05:09 Oh, you don't have to, Pa.
05:10 I got a free one for you already.
05:11 Oh, you did?
05:12 Yeah, and while I was there, I had the oil changed
05:14 and a new battery put in.
05:15 Also free?
05:16 No, but, gee, Pa, I felt funny just handing
05:18 the man a coupon and driving off.
05:20 And besides, Jake, the man said your battery was running low
05:22 and your oil was clogging.
05:24 My oil was not clogging.
05:25 It was pretty dirty, Pa.
05:27 So what did the free grease job cost?
05:29 $16.50.
05:30 $16?
05:31 Jake, please.
05:32 Well, what kind of a battery was it?
05:34 Gold-plated?
05:35 No, the battery didn't cost very much, Pa,
05:36 but when he had the car up on the lift,
05:38 he saw that the tires were wearing,
05:39 so he realigned the wheels.
05:41 I'll wash up, Ma.
05:42 Sammy.
05:43 Sammy, wait a minute.
05:44 Oh, look, a free belt.
05:46 Very nice.
05:47 So what's all this?
05:49 Oh, a few things, something, nothing.
05:52 So let me see the nothing.
05:54 That, for instance.
05:55 Well?
06:00 Open it, Rosalie.
06:02 You know Rosalie's going to a party, Jake,
06:04 and I want her to look nice.
06:05 Pa, look, Pa, it doesn't need any alteration.
06:10 And, Pa, the free belt was just made for the dress.
06:13 Continue.
06:15 Well, I didn't have any--
06:17 Jake, I made her buy the dress.
06:19 How can you walk into a store and get a present
06:21 and walk out without buying something?
06:23 After all, Jake, you're a businessman, too.
06:25 You should understand that.
06:27 And they're all your colleagues.
06:28 $16.98.
06:31 Pa, I got the belt free.
06:33 Don't say another word, Rosalie, before I forget myself.
06:36 What's going on here?
06:38 Rosie, go and hang yourself in your closet.
06:39 Molly, I want to know--
06:44 what's this?
06:45 Oh, this is my package.
06:47 What is it?
06:48 Nails.
06:49 Nails?
06:50 10 pounds of nails, assorted sizes.
06:54 What do we need nails for?
06:55 Well, who doesn't need nails in an emergency?
06:58 Every house needs nails, Jake.
07:00 But so many?
07:02 After all, you can't look a gift horse in the face, Jake.
07:05 Please, compliments, max hardware.
07:07 And the value is $2.
07:08 And this?
07:12 Oh, yeah, this-- wait, Jake, you'll see.
07:15 You'll see what I got here.
07:19 An electrical screwdriver.
07:21 We have a screwdriver.
07:23 But not an electrical, Jake.
07:25 Not only is this a screwdriver, it's also a drill.
07:28 And with the attachments, it's also a sander, a buffer,
07:36 a wax and a polisher.
07:38 But the nails were free.
07:40 Jake, if you saw that hardware store,
07:42 and the man who runs it, my age, standing on his feet
07:46 from morning till night--
07:47 With heart trouble?
07:48 Arthritis.
07:49 And is a widower?
07:50 From a man like that, should I accept a present, Jake?
07:54 So what did the free nails cost?
07:56 $19.85.
07:59 $20?
08:00 $19.85 is not $20, Jake.
08:06 And besides, it's my present to the house.
08:09 David, that's not the point.
08:12 Why should you buy something you don't even know how to use?
08:15 So I'll learn?
08:16 And if you learn, what in this house
08:18 has to be sanded and drilled?
08:20 The fireplace there, the fruit bowl?
08:22 David will find something.
08:24 Do it yourself as a hobby now anyway.
08:26 Here and there, David will find a hole to drill.
08:29 It'll pay for itself.
08:30 Believe me, Jake.
08:34 Well, Molly, now I'm waiting for you.
08:37 I'll go make supper now, Jake.
08:39 Just a minute, Molly.
08:41 Let me see your bargains.
08:43 It's not visible to you?
08:46 No.
08:47 It's not visible to me.
08:48 It's not visible to you?
08:50 No.
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25:42 (upbeat music)