11th apr 2025
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00My concern is that
00:29The body of your symptoms together with the TIA
00:32might implicate the early onset of dementia.
00:39Get back to work.
00:40Oh!
00:42What are you doing here?
00:44Hi.
00:45Hello, darling.
00:46Thought we'd be surprised you'd take a little lady to the shops.
00:49What were you looking at?
00:50What?
00:51Yeah, the face.
00:53Oh, yeah.
00:55I just got this message from Abby.
00:57That's weird.
00:59Yeah.
00:59I'm guessing she sent you that by mistake.
01:03Yeah.
01:04Yeah, right.
01:05Well, um, I best get back to...
01:07Oh, before you run off, I've, uh, got a little surprise for you.
01:11OK.
01:13Mm-hm.
01:15Got your keys.
01:16Oh, what am I like, eh?
01:20You're welcome.
01:22See ya.
01:23See ya.
01:23I'm, uh, I'm just gonna pop out for a minute.
01:33Yeah, no worries.
01:36I'll check now.
01:37Right, right.
01:38Oh, what are you talking about?
01:40You stupid woman, I sent it to you.
01:42Are those anti-sickness meds not working at all?
01:45I've not noticed today.
01:47Then tell me, so I can get some more.
01:50I'm telling you now.
01:53Have you kept anything down?
01:55Can we not talk about this now?
01:56We have to.
01:57No, all right.
02:00I feel rotten.
02:02I feel sick and hungry at the same time and...
02:05There's no way I can go go-karting with Jack.
02:10Something else which he's ruined, eh?
02:12You know what, it's all right.
02:13We'll postpone it.
02:14I'll sort it.
02:15Oh!
02:16Leave me alone!
02:18Er, er, right, OK.
02:20So I'll, er, I'll go pick up the meds and it's Friday,
02:22which, which means it's chicken noodle soup day at Royce.
02:25So let's try that, yeah?
02:25Yeah.
02:28Right.
02:32Oh, hi, Ty.
02:33Yeah, I'll change your plan.
02:34I need you to come in.
02:40Ow!
02:40Er...
02:41I...
02:41I can't!
02:42Go here.
02:43Listen, the girls are off school.
02:44I've told you.
02:45And Dorian's not even got a nurse here.
02:46Honestly, can you keep it down?
02:48You can hear your dad's on the phone.
02:49What's with the balloons, eh?
02:51Right, but why can't you check it?
02:52Why have I got a cheese?
02:53Well, there's no need for that, is there?
02:54Look, I've told you, I can't come in today.
02:57Not unless...
02:57I can't be swapping my shifts again.
02:59No, of course she can't.
03:00You hear that?
03:00She can't swap her shifts again.
03:01So, listen, maybe we're just going to have to cancel the sweet enough contract.
03:04But what else are we supposed to do?
03:05I can maybe talk to Carla again, maybe.
03:08Right, hang on, Abbey.
03:09Just give me two seconds.
03:09Fizzy's trying to talk to me.
03:10I'll see if I can go in late and then I'll have Dorian this morning.
03:13Well, I'll come look after him.
03:15Man the girls if you want.
03:16Er...
03:16Er, but what, he's a bit all over the place
03:19cos he's missing his mum, you know, and there.
03:20He barely slapped last night.
03:21Yeah, he looks well cut up to me.
03:24Come on, stop it.
03:25No, we just want to make sure that one of us is, like, with him all the time, don't we?
03:28Yeah.
03:29Fair enough.
03:30I can look after the girls, though.
03:31I didn't mean, yeah, to you.
03:33Just give me two seconds.
03:33I'm trying to sort something...
03:35Charming.
03:36Oh, come on.
03:37Come on, I know I've got a lot of making up to do,
03:39but I can take them into town.
03:42OK.
03:42OK, OK, yeah.
03:44No, I mean, OK, to you.
03:45Yeah, I can come in.
03:47Right.
03:48Yeah, all right.
03:48Yeah, she says thank you very much, Fizz.
03:50Thank you, Cassie.
03:52And she's swearing at me, standard.
03:53Right, tell me this part number, then.
03:55What is it you're missing?
03:55I'll get it...
03:56Ow!
04:02Oh, you've got to be joking.
04:04I've literally just fixed this screen.
04:07Er, damage.
04:09Er, no.
04:11Only to me dignity, Roy.
04:14Erm, can I please get two chicken noodle soups take away?
04:17Certainly.
04:20I don't believe this.
04:22I forgot me purse for crying out loud.
04:24I'll pay.
04:25Sit yourself down before something else happens.
04:29Do you know what?
04:30I think I should just go to bed and start again.
04:33Is everything OK with Kev?
04:34No, it's fine.
04:36You know what?
04:37It's not fine.
04:38It's actually feeling pretty dreadful.
04:40Ends me heading into town for some sickness meds
04:42and a few bits of food he can actually keep down.
04:45Oh, that's a shame.
04:47I was going to invite you both to the bistro later.
04:50Double date with me and Ronnie.
04:52And you know what?
04:54I think I might...
04:55I think I might try and get him out.
04:56Cos I think me and him cooked up together
04:58is making everything worse.
05:00So, what's the occasion?
05:02Nothing.
05:03Just thought we could hang out together.
05:05PHONE RINGS
05:06Still working, then.
05:08Hello, Ty.
05:14What do you mean, Deborah don't know what you're talking about?
05:17No, I sent her the picture.
05:19Well, she saw it because the tics turned...
05:21No, I sent it to her.
05:24Hang on a minute.
05:26You don't mean this, do you?
05:27I thought it was a funny thing to send me.
05:30Oh, my.
05:31I sent it to the wrong Debs.
05:33Yeah, I know, Ty.
05:35I know.
05:37I'm heading back now.
05:39Thank you, Roy.
05:40Just, can you...
05:42Turn her on, put her on.
05:43I've got...
05:44Deborah, I am so sorry.
05:46I'll see you later.
05:46I'm so sorry.
05:47You're not going to believe what I've just done.
05:52Poor Abby.
05:53Yeah.
05:53We all have our senior moments, don't we?
06:02I thought you were the parcel guy.
06:04Oh, I'm sorry to disappoint, Julie.
06:06Hi.
06:07No worries.
06:08Hi, everyone.
06:09Hiya.
06:09Ignore him.
06:10He's been in a grump all morning.
06:11It all went wrong with a closeted bloke off the internet.
06:14I mean, who'd have thought?
06:15Tell the world.
06:16It's Sean.
06:17It's Sean.
06:18Ergo, the world.
06:20Ergo, button it.
06:22Todd Grimshaw.
06:24Oh.
06:25You've been with a bloke off the internet, eh?
06:27Closeted.
06:27Been there.
06:28Bought the T-shirt.
06:29T-shirt with, uh-uh, putting it across the front.
06:31How are you spelling, uh-uh?
06:32Uh-uh!
06:33Please.
06:34But you really fell for him, though, didn't you?
06:36I could tell.
06:37You had the rosy glow of romance all over you.
06:39No, that was just his allergies playing up.
06:42Oh, go on, tell us about it.
06:43No.
06:44Oh, please.
06:45Humor a dying romantic.
06:47Oh, you did not just use the D-word card
06:49to try and wangle some gossip out of me.
06:51I did, yeah.
06:52Well, it's not going to work.
06:54And if you're going to do emotional blackmail,
06:56at least do it right.
06:58What are you in about?
07:01Well, come on.
07:02I can't be the only one that's thought like this.
07:05There are obvious perks to knowing when you're going to check out,
07:10aren't there?
07:11And just like that, the room darkened.
07:14Are these the conversations that you and George have at lunchtime?
07:17No, no, no.
07:18And you're talking about bucket lists?
07:20You know, asking to see the new Star Wars movie early
07:23because I'm not going to make the release date?
07:25Yeah, but basically.
07:26But it doesn't need to be films, does it?
07:28Anything that you've always wanted to do.
07:31Holidays.
07:32Ever fancied, I don't know, cruising a fjord,
07:35seeing the Northern Lights?
07:36Oh, I saw them a few months ago.
07:38See, once you've seen the aura borealis
07:40winking off the roof of the Eagles' Medus shopping centre,
07:43Lapland seems like a bit of a waste.
07:45It's got a point, although I wouldn't call it emotional blackmail,
07:50but crowdfunding for a holiday or something you want to do.
07:57Stargazing under Danby Beacon.
08:00Followed by chips and gravy on the end of Saltburn Pier.
08:03I trip up their funicular.
08:05And there's this cottage that I stayed in once on the moors that...
08:08What?
08:09Well, I'd be lying if I said I haven't given it any thought.
08:13Well, there you go.
08:14Well, they know it's too late.
08:16Todd?
08:17Crowdfunder.
08:18On it.
08:23Jenny!
08:24Yeah, I'll be right there.
08:27Of course, there's something where you can't get a drink in your own pub, isn't it?
08:30Oh, I don't know.
08:32To be so popular that I have to keep checking my phone every five seconds like a teenage little girl.
08:37Well, I don't know about every five seconds, Christina.
08:40I know.
08:40You're probably just missing your elusive Dominic, aren't you, love?
08:44Delivery for you.
08:45Well, why couldn't you have time for it?
08:47Draymond's here.
08:47Oh, it's fine. I'll wait.
08:52Honestly, tell me, Sarah.
08:54Does this place seem a little bit, you know, off in the last few months?
08:58Oh.
08:58Yeah, like, it's not really a happy place to come and have a quiet pint.
09:02Thanks.
09:05Kit.
09:07It's the man.
09:08You're going to want to hear about this.
09:09It's about a wonderful, romantic, but sadly strapped-for-cash lady called Julie.
09:14Right.
09:15Who is also, unfortunately, dying.
09:16Um, sorry to interrupt.
09:19Todd, man, could I, uh, have a word, please?
09:23Hold that thought.
09:27What do you say we caught the beast all for?
09:30Because you said you were bored being cooped up.
09:33I thought you'd like it.
09:35Oh, yeah.
09:36I'll be a lapper, innit?
09:39Look, don't worry about frescoes.
09:41I can make an order.
09:43I'm here now, Kev.
09:46Okay.
09:48I'll see you later.
09:51Okay.
09:52Bye, then.
09:52You have got to be kidding me.
10:09What are you playing at?
10:10What am I playing at?
10:11What are you playing at?
10:12I was reversing into that space.
10:13No, you weren't.
10:14You were just sat there.
10:15About to reverse.
10:16Oh, right.
10:17And me being psychic, I'm just meant to pick that up, am I?
10:19Have you heard of an indicator?
10:20Have you heard of charging into people's space?
10:23Oh, your space?
10:25Shut up.
10:25Wow, very nice.
10:27Very nice.
10:27Well, lucky for you, I hardly touched you.
10:30You're lucky for me.
10:32What do you mean he hardly touched me?
10:33That dent wasn't there before.
10:35Which dent?
10:36That dent.
10:37The one your insurers is forking out for.
10:39Right, A, there's no way that I just did that.
10:42And B...
10:42Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
10:43There is no B.
10:45You charged into me.
10:46You were paying.
10:47And one more smart comment and I'm going to knock your teeth out.
10:50Wow, you seem pretty angry.
10:52Maybe you need to talk to someone about that.
10:54Believe me, after the day I've had, you do not want to push me.
10:58What happened, love?
10:59Did you break a nail?
11:00I'm sorry, that wasn't called for.
11:03Yeah, that wasn't called for.
11:05Do you want to know what's happened, what's been happening?
11:07Honestly, no.
11:08I was on the phone to my husband.
11:10He's got cancer.
11:12And I am trying to be nice to him, but it is hard,
11:14because he's angry a lot, you see.
11:15I think he's pushing me away.
11:17And it's funny, she said, because I have been talking to someone.
11:20I've just finished having treatment for PTSD
11:22after having a young lad dying my arms.
11:24He was stabbed to death.
11:26But, yeah, you keep making your little jokes.
11:28I'm sorry.
11:30It's a guilt.
11:30No, no, really, I'm sorry.
11:31It's a guilt.
11:35You've got to be joking.
11:56You all right?
11:57No, it's fine.
11:58I've always had a...
11:59I just have to look at my nose and it starts bleeding.
12:02No, I'd get that checked out.
12:03It'll be low iron, wasn't it?
12:05Thanks for the advice.
12:07So, you're not going to, like, press charges for anything?
12:12Oh, and here was me thinking you were concerned for my health.
12:15No, I'm not going to press charges for you punching my nose.
12:18Oh, come on, it wasn't a punch.
12:20I barely touched you.
12:21It was more, more like a waft.
12:24Oh, OK, well, no, I'm not going to press charges for you wafting my nose.
12:30Right.
12:31That's how.
12:33And now let's just, let's just call it quits about the dent.
12:35That's not my dent.
12:37That's totally your dent.
12:38You know, it doesn't matter.
12:39It doesn't matter.
12:39Let's just draw a line under it.
12:41I'll pack over there and you can have this one.
12:44Oh, thank you very much.
12:46Very kind of you.
13:03Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
13:05Oh, no.
13:11Oh, no, no, no, no.
13:14It's not even my car.
13:20I'm borrowing it from a mate.
13:21Pop the hood.
13:23Pop the hood?
13:23What do you mean, pop the hood?
13:25Who even are you?
13:27And why do you think you can fix it?
13:28I'm a mechanic.
13:29And Cos, I'm a mechanic.
13:36Don't tell me you're thinking about getting back together with Cassie.
13:38Like, um, um, Evelyn.
13:42I mean, I'm not saying she scared me up.
13:43She scared you off.
13:45She's very scary.
13:46Yeah, fair enough.
13:48Well, this could get awkward.
13:52Hello, sweetheart.
13:53Hello.
13:54Oh, I'm talking to her earlier.
13:56Yeah.
13:58Aw.
14:00Keep it to yourself, Roy.
14:02But Tim's thinking about getting us into fostering.
14:05Are you not enamoured of the idea?
14:08Well, I like the idea.
14:10And as you know, I'm all very well for helping people who are less fortunate.
14:15And obviously, children are our future.
14:17But...
14:17Indeed.
14:18Well, it's less the idea.
14:20It's more the practicality.
14:21I mean, to be honest, I thought my days of mopping snotty noses was over.
14:26Well, it's not without its challenges.
14:29But fostering provided Hayley and I with some of the most memorable moments of our relationship.
14:36Can't be a horror film if it's a 12-year.
14:38Well, it sounds like a horror to me.
14:40Well, you were taking them to town.
14:45Yeah, we're on our way now.
14:46What do you mean, guessed?
14:47I don't know.
14:48I just sort of looked at her and winked.
14:49Just brilliant, mate.
14:50Thanks a bunch, yeah?
14:52I didn't know, did I?
14:52Yeah, thanks.
14:53And excuse me.
14:55Sir, here comes cake.
14:57Oh, yeah, I love it.
14:59You know, Roy was just saying that fostering was one of the best things that he ever did.
15:03Oh, yeah, they fostered Fizz, didn't they?
15:05Well, that worked out well.
15:06Hmm.
15:07What?
15:07Well, it doesn't always, you know, work out well.
15:10Yeah, I know.
15:11You don't always get a Fizz or a Layla.
15:14Oh, can you imagine that?
15:15Yeah.
15:16And can you imagine if you get a, you know, a hope?
15:21Oh, yeah.
15:23But, look, let me, let me look into it.
15:25Really?
15:26I'm not promising anything, but I'll have another look.
15:29Okay.
15:32See you, mate.
15:33Oh, I see you, mate, yeah.
15:38Listen, if they were to go on the road,
15:39well, I've got an hour free for lunch.
15:42A whole hour.
15:43There you are.
15:45I mean, give or take five, six minutes for me to, um, eat me sandwich.
15:49Oh, you old romantic.
15:51No.
15:52I've said I'd look after them.
15:54Then I wouldn't have to get the pictures by themselves.
15:56You know the way Ty worries about them.
15:58And to be fair,
15:59I hope did just try and draw your eye to her scooter.
16:03Yeah.
16:03A little psych.
16:04I suppose I could walk the most of the way.
16:13I could help you sell me, too.
16:15Yeah.
16:17Girls, change of plan.
16:20Roy, can you have a bag, please?
16:26Honestly, Carla, you don't need to worry.
16:28I know, I know I've been a bit distracted.
16:30Look, it's not that.
16:31And I have had a few problems getting a business loan.
16:34Look, it can't wait anymore, OK?
16:36It's going on the market,
16:37so whoever makes the decent offer...
16:38No, I am getting the money.
16:40Jenny, time's up.
16:42I'm sorry, look.
16:45Betsy lent me that money, OK?
16:47And it was from her dead mother, Becky.
16:50I can't be indebted to a child any longer.
16:53All right?
16:54Whether it's you who buys it,
16:56I don't mind, but it's going on the market
16:59and I need the money now.
17:04So, I've rang the software company
17:06and the new reservation system
17:08should be up and running today.
17:10Now, if it's not, tell me
17:11and I'll raise Mary-El with them.
17:14Okey-dokey, Shirley.
17:16Yes, I think that's everything.
17:18Debs!
17:19I just spoke to Tim.
17:21Come this way.
17:21I do really need to crack on.
17:23You didn't deserve to find out like that.
17:25You deserve fireworks and sunsets
17:27and the most romantic surprise proposal ever known,
17:30but it's all out of the bag now,
17:32so Debbie Webster...
17:33No.
17:34Will you...
17:35No.
17:36Just...
17:36No.
17:38OK?
17:41I love you.
17:43You're the most wonderful man I've ever met,
17:45but I don't want to get married.
17:48Not no.
17:50OK?
17:50OK?
17:52Please.
17:53Don't do this.
17:55I'm sorry, I...
18:01Yeah...
18:02Yeah, you don't need to explain.
18:05I sort of do.
18:06I do, yeah.
18:07But not on my knees.
18:08In the hotel lobby.
18:11It's a flipping heck!
18:13What was it?
18:15It's Kevin, looking for Abby.
18:17She's not answering the phone.
18:18And, um, I really do need to get to this meeting now,
18:22so you go home,
18:24and I'll see you at the bistro.
18:27Yeah?
18:29OK.
18:29OK.
18:36A truly rewarding experience.
18:39Well, that's what Roy said.
18:41Mm.
18:42We could really do this, you know.
18:44I thought we were going to the cinema.
18:47No, we're making cinema.
18:50Go on.
18:53Are you filming?
18:55Brand or joke number seven.
18:57An oldie bit of goodie.
18:58Because it's like I said to Roy,
19:00children are our future.
19:01They're filming us.
19:08They're filming us.
19:12Wet through.
19:15Well, there you are.
19:17Oh!
19:18As far as lunch breaks go,
19:20that has to be up there.
19:21Oh, yeah, that butty was lovely.
19:24It was a nice sandwich.
19:25Mm.
19:26And the trip to the cinema was the best.
19:28You know what?
19:29The bread was good.
19:30The cheese was just the right thickness.
19:31The pickle.
19:34Wait a minute.
19:35Wait a minute.
19:36You actually are talking about the butty, aren't you?
19:39Yeah.
19:41Oh!
19:42You're...
19:43Well, no, look, listen, you know,
19:48I mean, the sandwich, you know, was all right,
19:50but the pudding was, er...
19:53Mm, the pudding.
19:54Yeah, it was funny.
19:55Oh, hello.
19:59Whoa!
20:01Girls.
20:02What are you doing here?
20:04Er, what are we doing here?
20:05Sorry, what's he doing here?
20:07Hello.
20:10What have you done?
20:11Nothing.
20:12We've been here all this time.
20:14Well, that's what you're gonna say.
20:16Unless you want everybody knowing about, er...
20:18that.
20:19I'm just saying, you snooze, you lose.
20:27Flipping out, you say that, do you?
20:29My three-year-old says that.
20:31Er, will you pass me the tester?
20:34Well, he's obviously a very clever lad.
20:36He knows his onions.
20:37He knows his...
20:38Onions.
20:39Onions!
20:40How's it looking?
20:45Er, as someone who knows her onions, I would say it's looking awful.
20:49Do you want me to love?
20:50That's a shame.
20:51I'm enjoying this now.
20:52Don't suppose you fancy getting a drink after.
20:56Are you trying to pick me up?
21:01After nicking me parking space,
21:03ramming me car and having a right go at me?
21:05Er, I did none of those things, all right?
21:08But, yeah, I am totally trying to pick you up.
21:12I mean, you're funny, you're gorgeous,
21:14and you can mend cars.
21:15I'm actually considering proposing marriage.
21:18Er, well...
21:19Somebody bet you to it.
21:20Yeah, but he's trying to push you away.
21:24Sorry.
21:25Yeah, I shouldn't have said that.
21:26You said he was sick.
21:27Yeah, I'm not...
21:27I'm not just with him because he's sick.
21:29Didn't say you were.
21:33He wouldn't have to know, though, would he?
21:35Two strangers,
21:37a couple of hours in a nice hotel,
21:39near the bad days, feeling a whole lot better,
21:42before they never see each other again.
21:52No, obviously, no.
21:54Obviously.
21:55No, obviously, that'd be a bad idea.
21:59Well, I'm glad I didn't propose now.
22:01That would have been awkward, eh?
22:03Yeah.
22:17Try it now.
22:17You're a beauty.
22:20So, if I need you, who should have come?
22:39Ghostbusters.
22:39Which garage?
22:40Which garage?
22:41I am married.
22:42Yeah, but are you happy?
22:45Get that coolant topped up at your local garage.
22:48It's a long way away.
22:49You're lucky I didn't need your details.
22:51Well, I'm glad they had them over.
22:57Maybe I should drive into the back of here properly.
22:59Give you no choice.
23:00Then things would get messy.
23:02That would be the idea.
23:03Have a nice life.
23:06Do you always do the dishes after having sex?
23:24Hope!
23:25Oh, thank God for her.
23:27It's Sally.
23:28Don't open it.
23:29What's Sally doing here?
23:30Girls, I know you're a man.
23:33Oh, she must have seen his quick hide.
23:35What have you done?
23:36Nothing.
23:37I might did as well.
23:38When you go upstairs.
23:39Tonight, everything.
23:40Won't be a minute.
23:41Hello.
23:42Hello.
23:43Where are they?
23:44Who?
23:45They threw a balloon over my fence.
23:47A balloon?
23:48Don't they float?
23:49A water balloon.
23:51Oh.
23:52And they were filming us, too.
23:54Where's that going to end up, eh?
23:55On some group chat?
23:56Or even worse, the internet.
23:58Why, what were you doing?
23:59You weren't doing anything.
24:00So what's your problem, then?
24:02Come out, girls, and say you're sorry.
24:03They're not here.
24:04You must think I'm stupid.
24:07Did you find them?
24:08Oh, Tim.
24:09Why don't you come in as well?
24:11No, they're all plain silly beggars.
24:13And this one.
24:14Go on, leave it.
24:15No, I'm not going to leave it.
24:16I demand an apology.
24:18And I want that footage wiped.
24:20It's an invasion of our privacy.
24:22There must be a law against that, Tim.
24:24Yeah, they were bang out of order, them kids.
24:25And when Fizz and Tyrone find out, they'll do their nut.
24:27It was a water balloon.
24:29Do you know what I was doing at their age?
24:30Well, I suppose when you put it like that.
24:32Tim!
24:32Well, I mean, they could be in the bedroom playing video games,
24:34or even worse, smoking a crack pipe down the park.
24:38Yeah, playing out's good.
24:38They're getting fresh air.
24:39They're climbing trees and hygiene.
24:41Hijinks?
24:41Yeah, hijinks.
24:43Look, why don't you two just carry on this discussion at home, yeah?
24:46I'll be telling their parents to think we can't even relax in our own back garden.
24:51It's pathetic.
24:52Come on, love.
24:53Nobody's got to apologise.
24:54You girls, you just remember this.
24:56Throwing balloons, one thing, but filming us, cross the line.
25:00And close the door on the way out.
25:02What?
25:07Legend!
25:08You!
25:08You're too old to be playing with balloons.
25:10Oh, maybe I'll just get on crack then.
25:11That's even worse.
25:13Chicky.
25:13We can't even relax in our own garden.
25:15Take care.
25:18As you are.
25:21Oh, funny.
25:23Are we having starters?
25:29We should wait for Abby, really.
25:31But yeah, you, you have what you, what you like.
25:34I wish you'd hurry up.
25:36I can't decide between the calamari or the, uh, pate.
25:40Oh, I'm not sure I could keep the calamari down.
25:42Is it still that bad?
25:44I'll hold it down while you eat it.
25:45There's got to be a jug in there somewhere.
25:47Hold his arms.
25:48He's got eight of them.
25:50Hey, is it arms or tentacles?
25:52Is it calamari, squid or octopus?
25:54Octopus.
25:55Squid.
25:56Oh, eight squid, 50.
26:00So, do you still feel a bit sick?
26:02Here she is now.
26:02Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
26:04Where have you been?
26:06Long story.
26:07Have you ordered?
26:09It looked like it.
26:10Eight arms, two tentacles,
26:12calamari is Italian for squid.
26:15And beaks.
26:16What?
26:18Squids are beaks.
26:20He's losing his marbles.
26:22What's the soup with it here?
26:23Alphabet.
26:24Oh.
26:28I thought you were going to work, love.
26:34Tim, I'm not sure I want to foster.
26:38What, because of what happened this afternoon?
26:39No, not just because of that.
26:41Well, there'd be bigger challenges than water bombs.
26:43I know there would, and I can't face them.
26:45Of course you can.
26:46I was an analogue parent.
26:48It depressed me, them filming us like that.
26:51Well, they were just being kids.
26:52That's all.
26:54Come on, think about all the kids out there that haven't got a home that need love.
26:58Think about what Royce said.
26:59Think about this house and what we could provide.
27:01I like my house as it is.
27:03You said it was too quiet the other day.
27:04Well, I'm missing the girls, Tim.
27:06I'm ready for retirement, not more kids.
27:09Well, we couldn't save Mason, but we could save somebody else.
27:12Well, maybe we couldn't.
27:13You can't talk about that.
27:19Do you think I'm being selfish?
27:22No, you're not being selfish.
27:25I just got a bit excited, that's all.
27:27I know you did.
27:29But they wouldn't stay forever, you know.
27:31You'd get quiet time in between.
27:32Yeah, but we'd grow attached, and then we'd have to say goodbye.
27:35Hi.
27:37Okay, right, okay.
27:38So, which is it?
27:39You like it when it's quiet, or you're frightened that you love them too much?
27:41The girl lives in France.
27:43Imagine the life that she's living.
27:46I want to do something like that.
27:48Well, it's the first I've heard of it.
27:50You know, learn a new language,
27:52potter about in my ramshackle French garden,
27:55cycling back from the boulangerie with a baguette.
27:59Well, you've lost me now.
28:01Well, I am allowed to change my mind.
28:03And I know you're disappointed,
28:06but the girls were tricky enough,
28:08and I was young and fit in those days.
28:12And she'll be knitting booties for their kids.
28:24I think a sister's got out of me.
28:27What, you two had a barney?
28:29She, um...
28:31She said she's still interested in marriage.
28:33He should be out celebrating.
28:37Look, you can't blame her.
28:39She's come this far.
28:41It's not a be-all and end-all.
28:43You can still be together without being married.
28:47Or is she, um...
28:48No, she wants to call her quits.
28:52She'll come round.
28:53Well, that was embarrassing.
29:00That was a heck.
29:01She's just an old spoiled sport like my mother.
29:03I was on Hope and Ruby's side a thousand percent.
29:06No, I meant what Hope said about us.
29:08Oh, disrespectful.
29:10That's kids today for you.
29:12Well, maybe we should knock it on the head again.
29:15Mmm, yeah.
29:16Yeah, I know, fine.
29:18But you know you will text me again in the next hour,
29:20like you did last time.
29:21Oh, because you sent me that photo.
29:23Have you still got it?
29:24Yeah, it's my screen safety.
29:25No way!
29:26Yeah, oh, I deleted it.
29:27Amy's always in me phone.
29:29Well, does she go through, like, all your photos?
29:31Yeah, she was looking for pictures of when she was a kid.
29:33Oh, yeah, well, Hope and Ruby are the same.
29:37I wonder if my mother's got any old photos of me.
29:40Probably some odd faded Polaroid somewhere.
29:43Yeah, well, I mean, our Andy is Butch and Sundance.
29:46Some school fancy dress thing.
29:47Oh, I bet you were dead cute as a kid.
29:50Adorable.
29:51Oh, you know.
29:52I quite like all this sneaking round.
29:56I mean, why scare the horses?
29:57We could pretend that we're married.
30:00I am married.
30:01Even nosier.
30:03Are the girls definitely out?
30:05Yeah.
30:06Yeah, come on, then.
30:07Whoa!
30:08Woo!
30:09Wee-hee!
30:10Woo!
30:11No!
30:12Oh, Steve!
30:15Oh, um...
30:16She was just...
30:18booking a cab.
30:22He wasn't looking where he was going.
30:24But he didn't actually touch you.
30:26Well, we kissed bumpers.
30:28Ooh!
30:28Could have been worse if they were only kissing.
30:30You know that really old den?
30:33No.
30:34Oh, I made out about you, did it?
30:36Why?
30:37You blame that on him?
30:38I was just so angry.
30:40It was the arrogance.
30:41He was the one who wasn't concentrating.
30:43So what happened?
30:44Well, he went back to his car after I wiped the floor with him,
30:48and it wouldn't start.
30:49Oh!
30:50So did you help him?
30:52Good Samaritan, that I am.
30:53Should have charged him.
30:55Was he fit?
30:56What's that got to do with it?
30:57It's just an innocent question.
30:59Oh, well?
31:01Totally unmemorable.
31:02I just wanted your word.
31:08I wouldn't dream of making a scene at your mother-in-law's funeral.
31:13I'm insulted.
31:15I was making sure.
31:17I think I'd sacrifice my career.
31:18And as for...
31:23I don't know what happened between us.
31:25Look, I hooked up with someone the other night, all right?
31:27You are just a distant memory,
31:30a funny anecdote I might tell one day.
31:32Don't worry.
31:34I'll change your name and your job.
31:37Keep your eye colour the same.
31:45Who was he?
31:46He was someone who's not married to a woman.
31:50Fine.
31:51Fine.
31:52Well, I'll tell you what,
31:52don't look in my direction tomorrow,
31:54cos I'll be holding Daniel's hand all day.
31:56I'll try and contain myself.
31:58You don't have to be like that.
31:59Well, come on.
32:01Who do you think I am?
32:02What, you really think I make a show of myself?
32:04Clambering over the pews during the eulogy
32:06to stop you holding your wife's hand.
32:08I'm an undertaker.
32:10My dignity's all I've got.
32:14I shall go.
32:14No-one's stopping you.
32:21Look, I'm not dangerous or desperate.
32:27I'm a nervous wreck.
32:31See you tomorrow.
32:37See you.
32:37There you go, white wine spitzer.
32:44Cheers.
32:44I'll have another one of these if you're offering.
32:47I'm not.
32:49I'll get them.
32:52What's this in, Adolf?
32:53My horse came in.
32:55Oh, I didn't know you gambled.
32:56Three o'clock at Leopard's Sound.
32:58It's 2.20.
33:00Oh, feel free to get yourself one.
33:02Oh, I will let it go on this occasion, cheers.
33:05Another notch in your bedpost.
33:07Plenty of room on my bedpost.
33:10I'm practically a virgin.
33:11Shona thought you were one.
33:14Well, you can vouch for me, can't you, Daze?
33:16You can vouch for yourself at all very much.
33:19Thanks.
33:22How's the steak and kidney pie?
33:24What, you mean steak and kidney?
33:25That's what I said, did I?
33:29Oh, our dad used to say that all the time,
33:31used to think it was the funniest thing on the earth.
33:34Mind you, he never had a sense of humour.
33:37Well, he passed that gene on.
33:41Excuse me, is this seat taken?
33:43Oh, Cal!
33:46Hey, what are you doing here?
33:48Oh, wow, this is a sight for sore eyes.
33:54Carl.
33:54You must be the one, Ronnie.
33:56Yeah, that'll be me.
33:57Welcome.
33:57Good to meet you, mate.
33:59Thought you might be over due a visit.
34:00Oh, a little stranger.
34:02Oh, Abbey.
34:04Meet Carl, my brother.
34:05Carl, meet Abbey, the wife.
34:09Nice to meet you, Abbey.
34:14The pleasure's all yours.
34:24Oh, boy, that is tight.
34:35I love Craig.
34:36I love him too.
34:37It's just Bance.
34:38Oh, is Bance a polite word for flirting?
34:41I do not fancy PC Tinker.
34:44So, what other nicknames have you got for him?
34:46Henry Tinkler.
34:48Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy.
34:49Thanks, kiddo.
34:51Oh, you should hear what we call garlic on him.
34:59What do you make of that over there?
35:00Well, I'm no anthropologist, obviously, but I would say he likes her, she likes him.
35:08When I was collecting the glasses earlier, he was bragging about some big case he's working on.
35:14Well, you see, she's easily impressed.
35:18Do you know what?
35:19I had a fling with a copper once.
35:20Not one like him.
35:21Mine was proper Bobby on the beat.
35:23Full uniform.
35:26Sure, I wasn't a stripper, Graham.
35:28It's put Madam's nose out of joint.
35:30She gets over him easily enough.
35:34Madam couldn't give him monkeys.
35:37So, you see, he slept with Sarah's sister-in-law.
35:42What they like, them blats?
35:44They'll all be playing a banjo next.
35:47Okay, so, you don't fancy Craig?
35:50Is there anyone that you do fancy?
35:52What round here?
35:55Er, wouldn't want to say.
35:56I've got a couple of friends if you, you know, want me to hook you up with anyone.
36:02I'm off the market.
36:03Yeah, me too.
36:04Until at least Christmas.
36:06Next Easter.
36:07Oh, stay strong.
36:11And then she tried to make out he did it.
36:14Wait, so the dent was there before?
36:16I did it about three years ago, taking our jack to football training.
36:19And she looked so innocent.
36:20And when the bloke got back in his car.
36:23It wouldn't stop.
36:24Erm, who's telling this story?
36:26Me or you?
36:27Oh, all right.
36:28I hope you stopped to help him.
36:30Oh, she did, yeah.
36:31Free of charge.
36:32She should have rinsed him.
36:33That's what I would have done.
36:35Would you, eh?
36:36You're as decent as the day is long.
36:38Oh, now we're curving.
36:41Well, I may as well address the elephant in the room.
36:46Erm, sorry to hear you've been ill.
36:52Soon have it kicked to the curb, I'm sure.
36:54Too right.
36:57You'll need her more than ever.
36:59Some say it's harder for the spouse.
37:02Maybe so.
37:05Here we go.
37:07I need water.
37:08And last but not least, the man of the house.
37:15Dorian!
37:16Oh, yeah, I suppose you think that's dead funny.
37:18Dad, chill.
37:20I can't believe you told on her.
37:21I did not tell on you.
37:23I just confirmed what they already knew.
37:25Six messages Sally sent me.
37:26Yeah, and I had four off, Tim.
37:28I hope you've deleted all that footage.
37:30Yeah, we did.
37:30You better not have uploaded it.
37:32We didn't.
37:32You both go mad honestly when I take photos of you.
37:35Stop filming me.
37:36Don't put that anywhere.
37:37So how do you think they felt?
37:39If Sally filmed you and then put the video online without you knowing, you'd be mortified.
37:43She's right, girls.
37:45Actually, you two are supposed to set a good example for your brother.
37:48Do you think you could do that?
37:49Because to be honest with you, I'm not so sure.
37:51In fact, I've had it up to here with you.
37:53Girls!
37:56Granny Cass loves Amy's dad.
37:58Now, this is exactly what we're talking about.
38:00Less of this cheek.
38:01For starters, I do not love him.
38:03And secondly, can we just keep all laugh between the five of us?
38:07Six.
38:08And certainly don't go telling you know who.
38:11Who?
38:12Nanny.
38:13Oh, fine.
38:13Do you know what?
38:14Here's an idea.
38:15Why don't we all try and be quiet for five minutes, eh?
38:18And I'll speak to you later.
38:22Yeah, I'm so sorry.
38:23Can you repeat that, please?
38:24You'd be charged with isolation.
38:26You should have got internet.
38:26It's a licence to print money.
38:29First big contract was a shopping mall in Dresden.
38:31Literally raining euros.
38:33And where is the memory service department?
38:38I suppose I should write that down in case I forget.
38:40Yeah, I bet you hear that all the time.
38:44So I just get there tomorrow, the time of my appointment, yeah?
38:49Okay, thanks.
38:53You must know your way around an engine, then.
38:56Diagnostics, mainly.
38:58Sorry about that.
39:00Work.
39:01How is faulty towers?
39:03In general?
39:04Yeah.
39:04I'd say it was good, wouldn't you?
39:06People always need a place to stay.
39:08Speaking of which, has the presidential suite got my name on it?
39:12I know, our couches.
39:15Choice is yours.
39:17Breakfast included?
39:19Well, traditional or continental.
39:21Memory foam pillows?
39:23I still can't believe you're here.
39:25Look who it is.
39:27Hey, Uncle Ronaldo.
39:28Well, if it isn't Jack Webster.
39:31It's an Uncle Carl.
39:33Good to see you, come on.
39:35Oh, cheers.
39:36Who's that?
39:37That's yours.
39:37Hey, he's not had his tea yet.
39:39Ignore the fun, police.
39:42Get stuck in, lad.
39:43Let me get your chair.
39:49I don't blame her.
39:51Why you want to foster at your age is beyond me.
39:54I'm in my prime.
39:56You're stuck together with sellotape and string.
39:59I tick as in good health.
40:00I can just see it from Sally's side.
40:04That's all I'm saying.
40:05Well, she was all guns a-blazing at lunchtime.
40:08Obviously a reminder.
40:09It was a water balloon.
40:11Yeah, it was just the tip of the iceberg.
40:13I mean, kids can be a nightmare.
40:14You should know.
40:14Your fae got pregnant at 12.
40:1613.
40:16Todd still owes me last month's rent.
40:19And he used all the hot water this morning.
40:21You could foster him.
40:23I could have saved Mason from dying.
40:25What, by taking him under your wing?
40:27You know it doesn't work like that.
40:28They do what they want,
40:29and then they do the opposite of what you tell them.
40:32I could have taken him to county.
40:33Fishing, maybe.
40:35Well, you can't do it on your own.
40:36So if Sally's out, that's it.
40:38You should be thanking Tyrone and his kids.
40:41But I'm serious about Todd.
40:44You're welcome to him.
40:49Street cars.
40:50Come on then.
40:53Turn them over.
40:54That's it.
40:55No.
40:57Come on then.
40:58If you haven't found some,
41:00you have to turn them back on the wrong way.
41:03Let's get it over with.
41:05Well, you were supposed to take the girls to the pictures,
41:07but oh no, you bent them off, didn't you?
41:09So you could have fun with your boyfriend.
41:11He's not my boyfriend.
41:13Well, that's even worse.
41:14Sneaking about the place,
41:16poisoning pensioners,
41:17lying to our neighbours.
41:18You know, Sally, Sally is a good friend.
41:20What?
41:21No!
41:21I was taking the girls' side.
41:23I thought you'd be glad about that.
41:26Do you know, every time I walk through that door,
41:27I think to myself,
41:28what has she done now, eh?
41:29Oh, would you rather that's boring?
41:31I was blind!
41:32Do you want me to be boring?
41:33I'm right, actually.
41:34Yes.
41:35Look,
41:36I really like Steve.
41:39A lot.
41:40Eugh.
41:41Well, that's going to spread like wildfire over there.
41:43Who cares about who I like?
41:45It's Ken's son-in-law.
41:47I can't help it if he can't resist me.
41:50Oh, go on, send me another ace of selfie.
41:52What?
41:54Nothing.
41:55Right, I'm going to get dressed.
41:56That makes a change.
41:58Look!
41:58Will you stop being so mardy?
42:02Every time I walk through that door,
42:04I think, what's it going to have the hump about today?
42:06We didn't go to the pictures
42:08because there was nothing the girls fancied.
42:11I'm a 50-something-year-old woman
42:12and I'm your mother.
42:15And I don't need you taking me off.
42:18Especially in front of the family.
42:21Trying my best, you know.
42:23Imagine if it was never good enough.
42:35Come on, then.
42:36Right, I'd better go and get Alfredo settled.
42:39Oh, well, good luck.
42:40Wendy gave him two choc-icers.
42:41He'll be pinging off the walls.
42:43Oh, he deserves it.
42:44Cute kid.
42:45Hey, he's chuffed to bits.
42:47Nice touch.
42:47Game of shame.
42:48Yeah, and Jack loved his tracksuit.
42:50What use am I if I don't come bearing gifts?
42:52Well, you can teach him a bit of German.
42:54I told him he was robbed 15 years ago
42:57when Lampard's goal was disallowed.
42:59They thought he was payback.
43:00What, 66?
43:01That had crossed the line as well.
43:03Kevin.
43:04Well, talk amongst yourselves.
43:05Oh, and read him a story.
43:07Otherwise, I'd be too excited to go to sleep.
43:08So, uh, Alfie's the solicitor's boy?
43:16Alfie's Kevin's boy.
43:18But if you want to cause trouble,
43:20presidential suite.
43:22You pretended that I put a dent in his car
43:24and that was when you liked me?
43:26You deserved it.
43:27I think someone else should have a story read to them.
43:31In case they're too excited to go to sleep, huh?
43:33Oh, come on.
43:35I didn't know who you were, all right?
43:37I was just a single bloke flirting in a car park.
43:40You're loving this.
43:41I didn't do anything dishonest.
43:44I am counting down the hours
43:46until you're gone.
43:48Start the clock, then.
43:49Oh, come on.
44:19I don't know who you were, all right?
44:20I don't know who you were, all right?
44:21I don't know who you were, all right?
44:22I don't know who you were, all right?
44:23I don't know who you were, all right?
44:24I don't know who you were, all right?
44:25I don't know who you were, all right?
44:26I don't know who you were, all right?
44:27I don't know who you were, all right?
44:28I don't know who you were, all right?
44:29I don't know who you were, all right?
44:30I don't know who you were, all right?
44:31I don't know who you were, all right?
44:32I don't know who you were, all right?
44:33I don't know who you were, all right?
44:34I don't know who you were, all right?
44:35I don't know who you were, all right?