The Only Way is Essex - Season 35 Episode 4
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00:00The only way is up, baby
00:06So you and me now
00:12No way's up, not coming down
00:15Take me to the top, feet off the ground
00:19I just wanna be right here, right now
00:22I'm falling right down
00:24I'm getting ready, let's go
00:28I hope it's a nice buffet
00:30It will be, it will be
00:32I'm only having croissants
00:33Mate, try the bacon
00:34Mate, I ain't trying the bacon
00:35Try the bacon
00:36I don't want the bacon
00:37No way's up, I'm getting ready, let's go
00:41Bump backs, don't wanna go slow
00:45I'm gonna get well done scrambled eggs
00:47Ooh, yes
00:49Scrambled eggs, that is a lot of bacon
00:52Yeah, because I'm bulking
00:54Wow
00:56He's a greener on the other side
01:02How are you doing?
01:03Alright, Fred
01:04You alright, bub?
01:05You look handsome
01:06Fancy a panchacola?
01:07Let's go
01:08Want to have breakfast with me?
01:09Yeah, come on
01:10Come with me, let's go
01:14Oh my God, is that chicken?
01:15I'm gonna get some chicken
01:16For breakfast?
01:17With roasted chicken
01:18It's just gonna sit there
01:19Excuse me, do you do gravy?
01:20Yes, we do gravy
01:21Chicken and gravy for breakfast
01:22You do gravy?
01:23Yeah, you heard of Newcastle?
01:24Yeah
01:25I wish
01:33I'm getting ready, let's go
01:36It's a new day, new day, hopefully a fresh start
01:40Morning campers
01:41Morning campers
01:42Morning
01:43Oh hey
01:44Are you feeling alright?
01:45It's not off the kids menu
01:46Hey
01:48Broaden in the palette, Roman
01:52Starving
01:53Starving, what are you gonna have?
01:56Dunno
01:57I hope they've left some sausages behind
02:03You're just not gonna break your jet lag if you keep sleeping in the day
02:05Drink a beer, I've gave you a beer
02:07I can't have beer at breakfast, can I?
02:08Is it frowned upon?
02:09No, you're on holiday, do what you want
02:11We had a nice, relaxed day yesterday
02:12Me and Courtney went down to a nice beach bar
02:14Yeah, we had a nice little chat
02:15We had a nice chat, fell us in, fell us in
02:17We were just giving each other advice that we're probably not gonna take
02:19Yeah
02:20Are you missing Jodie out here?
02:21Yeah, I'm missing her, but I don't want to talk about it
02:23Keep talking about it
02:24No, it's only because I spoke
02:25Are you feeling under the carpet?
02:27Yes
02:28Get them out under that carpet
02:29Probably our bit of just speaking about it
02:31And I like to distract it with something else
02:33You'll make a joke
02:34You're better when you talk about things
02:35Listen, I know you're all coming from a good place
02:37because you obviously really care about me
02:38and I get that and I appreciate that
02:39We do
02:40But I do, like, I think I've been talking about it so much
02:42it's sort of not got off my mind
02:44But when I'm, like, going around
02:45I feel like I'm just going around to everyone all the time
02:47going, oh God, I'm doing this thing
02:48I feel like I just need to just chill out for a bit and just
02:50I've never had to have a deep chat with someone
02:52the way I do chat with you
02:53Yeah
02:54We actually get deep
02:55How's you and Matilda?
02:57Have you missed her?
02:58Missed her bears
02:59I actually come out here
03:00It was you lot as well
03:01You thought I was going to be all mopey
03:02Yeah
03:03I thought I was going to be mopey as well
03:04Got out here and I was like, you know
03:05I just got to get on with it
03:06Yeah, I said, I said
03:07Why are you laughing?
03:08I've seen you on the phone to her
03:09Yeah, I was on the phone to her
03:10Oh, baby, baby
03:11I miss you so much
03:12You do that, guys
03:13But I said that
03:14That's when you know you're in a good relationship
03:16You don't feel like you have to stay indoors
03:18You don't feel, like, anxious
03:19No
03:20That you're being yourself
03:21I feel fine, yeah, I feel fine
03:22You should be able to go out and have fun
03:23Because she's going to be at home waiting for you
03:24when you get back
03:25Yeah, of course
03:26She is the one for me
03:27I'm done now
03:28Yeah, I'm done
03:29How was your girls' lunch yesterday?
03:30It was nice
03:31It was nice
03:32Obviously, it was just us and Soph
03:33Danny and Ella walked in
03:34And they obviously came and said hello to us
03:36Like, we had, like, a little mini conversation
03:38about Joe and Junaid
03:39And then they went and sat somewhere
03:40Like, a different table
03:41I think if Ella wasn't there
03:42Danny would have sat with us
03:43And we would have had it
03:44But I just think we sat at that stage
03:45where me and Ella were never going to be friends
03:47Yeah
03:48Like, we were just sitting like this
03:49around the table
03:50And, like, cheers in our drinks
03:51But, like, that's okay
03:52And I don't want it to be a problem
03:53I don't think Ella would want to sit there
03:54No, of course not
03:55No
03:56I wouldn't want to sit with my friends
03:57That would make sense though
03:58You wouldn't want to
03:59It's different when we're going to go
04:00Because we've all planned to go to a club, haven't we?
04:01Being at an intimate lunch
04:02is probably unrealistic
04:03You ain't going to sit one-on-one with her
04:04Do you know what I mean?
04:05You're never going to sit like that
04:06Obviously, when we're all in a big group of us
04:07It's fine
04:08Because you're in your group
04:09We're in one
04:10And we all, like, float between each other
04:11I just don't want it to be
04:19We're just never going to
04:20I don't think they will
04:21Because that's a normal thing to not
04:22It's very normal
04:23And I think Danny gets it as well
04:24She gets it
04:25I hope she does
04:26Listen, even if all this stuff
04:27hadn't gone on
04:28People have their separate groups anyway
04:29Do you know what I mean?
04:30But we was a little bit separate
04:31Do you know what I mean?
04:32Because of, obviously, things that have gone on
04:33Yeah
04:34Different scenarios, different things
04:35It's easy for us all to coexist
04:36and be in the same rooms
04:37Go on nights out and stuff
04:38There isn't an issue with that
04:39Yeah
04:40Everyone is good
04:41Yeah
04:42Because I've only got Roman
04:43So now I've got to sit with yous
04:44I know, ain't you all do?
04:45On absolute liberty
04:47Your mate who picked you up off the phone
04:48was crying all Christmas
04:49It's good to be your bird
04:50You've got your bird
04:51We ain't got our birds
04:52Well, even though you've only got
04:53Jordan and Roman
04:54You've gained us now
04:55Exactly
04:56So we're all together
04:57Is that how it used to be?
04:58We're your standing girls
04:59We're back like the old days
05:00Standing girlfriends
05:01It does feel like the old days
05:02It does
05:03I love us together
05:04We have a lot of fun
05:05Yeah, it's been fun
05:06Yeah, it's been fun
05:07We're back
05:08Is there something going on
05:09between Harry and Freddie?
05:10Oh, my cheek
05:11I ain't seen them together
05:12What?
05:13I ain't seen them together
05:14No
05:15Oh, I threw you in
05:17Freddie has turned around
05:18and said that he wouldn't say no
05:20to a date with Harry
05:21Basically, they've been a bit flirty
05:23Oh, really?
05:24And we're just a bit like...
05:25Does Harry fancy him?
05:26Oh, really?
05:27Yeah, they both fancy each other
05:28He's over it
05:29Morning
05:30Hey
05:31Oh, hello, you all
05:32Hey, Daryl
05:33Morning
05:34You all look lovely
05:35Look at you
05:36I like that
05:37We're back together
05:38Yeah, it's good
05:39You get a bit like that
05:40You OK?
05:41Yeah, my cheeks actually hurt
05:42Hello, darling
05:43You OK?
05:44Morning, girls
05:45Hello
05:46Morning, Troopers
05:48Joel, are you going out tonight?
05:50If you are, Saf
05:52Are you a woman?
05:53Are you weird?
05:54Go on, Saf
05:55Woo
05:56She's wearing cigar
05:59Bye
06:00Bye
06:01Hey
06:02Hey
06:03Oh, darling
06:04You look a sensation for breakfast, girl
06:05I know, but I'm thinking beach club after
06:07Oh, yeah, yeah
06:08We'll be out and about
06:09How are you feeling?
06:10Last night was a lot, but...
06:12What's the matter?
06:13Well, I've texted Harry already
06:14and I'm asking him to meet me here
06:16What?
06:17I'm just going to tell him now
06:18What, you're going to...
06:19He's going to come here to meet you?
06:20Yeah, well, I thought...
06:21I can't bluff to keep, like, avoiding him
06:24I feel like I'm avoiding him
06:25I'd rather just get out
06:26Listen, a problem shared is a problem halved
06:30Yeah
06:31I'm literally shaking
06:32I'm going to go sit down anyway, darling
06:34Girl
06:35Love yous
06:36Darling
06:37Hey
06:38You all done?
06:39Youse OK?
06:40Yes, very good, thank you
06:41Starved
06:42Starved?
06:43Just a little bit
06:44You are late to breakfast
06:45I'm always late
06:46Fashionably
06:47I get glam before breakfast
06:48Who does that?
06:49So
06:50Well, I did a bit today
06:51Yeah, we all do, actually
06:52We're on the holidays, Danny
06:53Exactly
06:54There's a very much a curly hair friend thing going on here
06:56Yeah, no, I love it
06:57I needed a fellow curly girly
06:59When you've got curly hair, there's just something different
07:02Exactly
07:03You're always different
07:04Yeah
07:05I spoke to Junaid yesterday, didn't I?
07:07Did you?
07:08Yeah
07:09What was said there?
07:10It's all right, I just said to him
07:11He's just like a shell of a man
07:12I said, if I'm honest with you
07:13I said he needs to speak to you first
07:15They've taken a leaf out of what I said last night
07:17Yeah
07:18To stop putting themselves away from people
07:19And they hopefully will cover for us
07:21I actually haven't seen him at breakfast
07:22Not once
07:23Have you seen him yet?
07:24Seen him around the hotel or anything?
07:26No, not really
07:27A little bit around the hotel
07:28But we don't even look at each other
07:30It's mad, isn't it?
07:31It is mad because he was your best mate
07:32That would never happen with me and James
07:34Or like you and Charlotte
07:35Yeah
07:36He's just a different person
07:37It's given me time to reflect on the whole friendship
07:39And that's what's actually
07:40It's done me a favour, him leaving it so long
07:42Yeah
07:43Because now I know I don't want to be friends with him
07:44Yeah, yeah, yeah, you've had that time
07:45If I didn't have that time
07:46You'd apologise sooner
07:47I probably would have jumped back on the friendship
07:49You'd fall back on the trap, yeah
07:51Shall we go here?
07:53Hello, you all right?
07:54You all right?
07:56I need to get really bad, I'm dying for a drink
08:09It's so awkward
08:16These aren't environments for me to speak to people
08:18It makes me feel more enclosed
08:19Well, the thing is because everyone's listening
08:21I don't really want to have a conversation with certain people
08:23It makes me feel more uncomfortable
08:24It puts me more into my shell
08:25And it makes my guard go up even more
08:28Because I'm shaking like a leaf
08:32How did we get to this point?
08:36I want to talk to people
08:37And I want to make amends with people
08:39But this isn't the right environment
08:42Not in front of everyone?
08:43No
08:44I'll happily speak to people in smaller group environments
08:47But it's not as awkward
08:48When I spoke to Jordan and Chloe
08:51It was a calm environment
08:53This doesn't feel very welcoming
08:54No, at all, no
08:56Hello
08:57Oh, here they are
08:58How are you?
09:02Oh, you got me a croissant already
09:04Harry, you look so tan
09:05Thank you
09:06I've got my body glow on
09:08Where have you been?
09:10He's having a chinwag
09:11You okay, boys?
09:12Hi, friends
09:13I'll go sit with Danny
09:20Hi, gorgeous girl
09:21Hey, Bob, she okay?
09:23You look nice
09:24We having a business chat?
09:25Business meeting as always
09:26You okay?
09:27Yeah
09:28Love your necklace
09:29Thank you
09:30Goes with my outfit
09:31You're fine, aren't you?
09:32No, Joe, I don't want it
09:37Hello
09:49Why's she looking at me like that?
09:51Oh, you don't, you still don't know?
09:53He ain't got Chloe, mate
09:54Oh
09:55You tell me
09:56Listen, he want our information to tell you
09:58But now's the time for us to tell him, do you know what I mean?
10:00So we can, really
10:02Go on, then
10:04It weren't just a kiss
10:06Before they ended
10:08They went all the way
10:10They should
10:12Before it was over
10:13I've got a present
10:15Are you gonna eat?
10:16No, I'm alright, actually
10:17Can't eat
10:18That's right
10:22Don't hate me, I've got something to tell you
10:26What?
10:27I know you've, like
10:30You've asked me a million times
10:33Obviously
10:34About
10:35Joe and Junaid
10:38And things in Cyprus
10:39And if anything happened, but
10:41I've just got to get it off my chest
10:43It's like, look
10:44They're talking over there
10:45And then to, like, you again
10:48How can I have a conversation with anyone?
10:50No
10:51Like, I know you've given me the opportunity
10:53To tell you so many times
10:54Did stuff go on?
10:55But I couldn't be honest with you then
10:57But now that we're closer
10:58And we're friends
10:59I feel like I can't keep it from you
11:02Like, obviously
11:04Things did go on between them
11:06In Cyprus
11:09Back home in the UK
11:11Before Joe called things off with you
11:16And
11:18It just weren't the right time to ever tell you
11:20Harry, you've got to understand
11:21Like, he was my friend then
11:23But I can't continue lying to you
11:28I'm, like, barefaced lying to you
11:30And I feel like
11:31The only way for you to move forward
11:32And truly put it behind you
11:33Is to know the truth
11:34And
11:38Lisa
11:39They were kissing in Cyprus
11:43And
11:44Since coming home from Cyprus
11:46They were obviously sleeping together
11:48Before he called things off with you
11:51I think we actually should sit
11:52It's actually be this heaven behind Harry's back
11:54Cos we all thought all along
11:55Yeah
11:59I can't even look that side
12:01There's not much I'm missing
12:02I can't see behind me
12:04You can't see behind you
12:07Don't wind yourself up
12:08Are these bacon slices?
12:12I'm Muslim, I don't eat bacon
12:13Oh yeah, sorry
12:15Oh God
12:30The only way is love
12:45I know I've lied to you so many times
12:46It's OK
12:47Do you understand why?
12:48Don't be so silly
12:49I've lied, though
12:50Don't be so silly
12:51Really, I'm really
12:52It's fine
12:53Honestly, I've been stressed out about it
12:54Cos I've been barefaced lying to you
12:55Don't be stressed out
12:56Honestly, Dan A
12:57Like, I'm literally shaking
12:58But you've got to understand
12:59Dan A
13:00I only kept it from you
13:01Because he was my best mate
13:02Do you know what I mean?
13:03Dan A, I really, really, really
13:04Appreciate you telling me
13:05I can't imagine any more
13:06I know that weren't fucking easy
13:08I mean, their behaviour in Cyprus
13:10Was strange anyway
13:12I know, and I'm so sorry
13:13Why was he running around saying
13:15I've got feelings
13:16What, for someone who didn't even kiss?
13:17Come on
13:19But this is what I mean
13:20Like, it's just stressed me out
13:22I just don't want you to hate me
13:24Do you understand why I've not told you sooner?
13:25Dan A
13:26Do you get it?
13:27Give me a cuddle now
13:28I'm sorry for not telling you sooner
13:29Dan A
13:30Honestly
13:31I could honestly, could never
13:33I'm sorry for lying to you
13:34I could never hate you
13:35Barefaced lying to you
13:36I'm sorry
13:37I could never hate you
13:38I feel bad for Dan A
13:39You don't shoot the messenger
13:41Dan A's a good girl
13:42Dan A ain't done nothing wrong
13:45So awkward
13:46Right
13:48Go
13:49Do you want to go?
13:50Yeah
13:51Yeah, let everyone enjoy their breakfast
13:52Just
13:57What happened?
13:58They've walked away
13:59Aren't they just over breakfast?
14:00What's going on?
14:01Why have they walked away?
14:03Have we missed something?
14:05So Harry
14:06Bottom line is
14:07They did it behind your back
14:12That was a lot
14:13Mm
14:14Joe
14:15You need to come back in there
14:17It's just so awkward
14:18I can't do it
14:19You've got it Dan A
14:20I know, but listen
14:21I spoke about a lot of things with us
14:23And I think she is talking to Harry about it now
14:25And I think you need to just come back in
14:27So what are they saying?
14:28That's what I mean
14:29I don't know what she said to him
14:30But I know that she's talking to Harry
14:33Harry, can I just say something to you?
14:35Honestly, I've only come out to get me almond croissant
14:37I know, but can I just say something to you?
14:39Listen, all I knew about was the kiss
14:41And I don't want you to think I hid anything from you
14:42All I knew about the kiss
14:44And that they got a bit fruity
14:45But I didn't know that they went the full way
14:47I do not
14:48I do not think anything differently of you, so
14:50Please do not worry about that
14:51I do not think anything different of you
14:52I was worried that you wouldn't speak to me again
14:53Because I know I was a bit all right to you
14:54Danny
14:55No, Danny
14:56Sorry
14:57That would never, ever happen
14:58Don't be so silly
14:59Danny, how much respect I have for you
15:01The way you dealt with our situation last year
15:03No, please don't cry
15:04I didn't want to lie to you
15:08But I couldn't
15:09Oh, Danny
15:10Listen, we all had
15:11Everyone had half an idea, Dan
15:12Oh, look at Harry
15:13It ain't your fault
15:16He was my best mate
15:17And I should have told you
15:18Harry, what's wrong?
15:19Yeah, they was already together
15:21Behind closed doors
15:22It all makes sense
15:23What?
15:24Not in Cyprus
15:25How do we know that?
15:26They kissed in Cyprus
15:27And then they slept with each other
15:28Back in the UK
15:29This leaving together wasn't in Cyprus
15:31Before they was broken up
15:32But it was before they were broken up
15:34Back in the UK
15:35Oh, wow
15:38I think you just need to have this conversation
15:41What else is there for me and Harry to talk about?
15:43The honesty and the truth has got to come out
15:45For a bit of respect for Harry
15:46What does Harry want to say
15:47In front of a room full of people?
15:48Well, I don't know
15:49Danny spoke to Harry
15:50I don't know
15:51And I think you should go and talk to him
15:52I think you've got to
15:53What's he got to say?
15:55Sorry
15:56You have got to stop worrying at the minute
15:58What you've done, yeah
15:59He takes a big character, yeah
16:00He was your, listen
16:01He was your best friend
16:02But I think that's
16:03There's no one expecting you to turn their back on him
16:05She's done everything she needed to do, Dan
16:07She's told you
16:08Do you know what it is?
16:09I just think it's because you can never
16:10Apparently you've got something to say
16:12I haven't got nothing to say to you
16:13I think you've got something to say
16:14Yeah, I want to talk to you in a private
16:16I don't want to
16:17I don't want to talk to you, no
16:19Okay
16:20So can you please leave
16:21Because I don't want to talk to you
16:22Do you not think you want
16:23I'll close your conversation about the situation
16:25And you can both move back from here
16:27No, you both lied to me
16:28No
16:29Bye
16:30Okay, lovely
16:31I thought you had something to say
16:32I have nothing to say to you
16:33If you want to have a conversation
16:34I'll have to have a conversation
16:35No, I don't want to talk to you
16:36Joe, you do owe an apology, though
16:37It's fine
16:38Because you two have kissed inside the press
16:39Behind his back
16:40And they shagged
16:41No, we didn't
16:42Yeah, you did
16:43Because it came from Janaye's mouth
16:44Janaye, you told me
16:45What?
16:46That you had sex
16:47Not inside, because she didn't
16:48You told me the night after Ellie's birthday
16:49Oh, come on
16:50What do you mean, come off it?
16:51No, no, no
16:52You've got to own it
16:53No, no
16:54You have got to own it
16:55I'm sick of defending you two
16:56And then I look like the bad one
16:58It's true, though
16:59It's a liberty
17:00Fuck this shit
17:03Fuck this shit
17:04They just need to come, own it
17:05Apologise
17:06Hold their hands
17:07And go, listen
17:08It was wrong
17:09I'm sorry
17:10Because that's what I would do
17:11Cowards walking away
17:12The pair of them, cowards
17:13I'm sorry, but
17:14When you're guilty
17:15And you walk away
17:16If you actually had nothing to hide
17:18You'd stand there
17:19And you'd defend yourself
17:20Until you're blue in the face
17:21But it's because they're fucking liars
17:22They lie about everything
17:23And they can't even handle the fact
17:24That people now know
17:25That they're true colours
17:26And they're bought off
17:27Honestly, I'm just
17:28I've never
17:29It's lots of words
17:30But I just
17:31I had to get myself out of there
17:32No, I'm glad that we left
17:33I wasn't going to sit in there
17:34And be tortured anymore
17:35By all of them
17:37Oh, my God
17:38I've never wanted to get
17:39Into this room so bad
17:41What has just happened?
17:42I'm just so glad
17:43That we're in our very own
17:44That we're in our own
17:45Little safe space
17:46Like, what is
17:47Like, what
17:48Like, what even was that?
17:49What did he even say to you
17:50When you went over there?
17:51Nothing
17:52He was like
17:53I said, apparently
17:54You've got something to say
17:55And he was just like
17:56I don't want to talk to you
17:57He was like, leave me alone
17:58So I was kind of like, okay
17:59And then I don't know
18:00I don't even know from where
18:01But someone was like
18:03You two slept together
18:04Inside for us
18:05And like, Freddie
18:06What the fuck was that?
18:07The last thing I
18:08He's meant to be our mate
18:09The last thing I heard
18:10Before I left there
18:11Was I'm sick to death
18:12Of standing up for you two
18:13And I thought
18:14Well, don't then
18:15You're supposed to be
18:16My best friend
18:17I'm not even
18:18I feel like there's a part of me
18:19I'm not even surprised
18:20That Freddie's just gone
18:21On the turn like that
18:22But what's annoying me
18:23Is everyone thinks
18:24That they know
18:25What's actually happened
18:26When no one actually
18:27Knows the truth
18:28If we take it back, right
18:29In Cyprus
18:30Where we started off
18:31Yeah
18:32Right
18:33One night
18:34We got stupidly drunk
18:35Yeah
18:36And we had a little peck
18:37I don't even know
18:38But like, I wouldn't even
18:39Cast it as a kiss
18:40It was me literally
18:41Saying goodbye to you
18:42And it was like a goodbye
18:43It meant to be a kiss
18:44On the cheek
18:45And then
18:46You turned your head
18:47It was so quick
18:48I wouldn't even cast it
18:49As a kiss though
18:50When was the first time
18:51That we slept together?
18:52Fajita night
18:53Fajita night
18:54But what I think
18:55Everyone's forgetting
18:56Is okay, yeah
18:57Technically
18:58I was in a relationship
18:59With Harry
19:00But I was done
19:01The last conversation
19:02I had with Harry in Cyprus
19:03It was for me
19:04It was over
19:05I knew there was never
19:06Going to be any going back
19:07From that point
19:08Do you know what I mean?
19:09I'm sorry
19:10When you look back at it
19:11The lines were all there
19:12I actually didn't think it
19:14Did you know?
19:15No
19:16Danny literally told me
19:18Here
19:19Because I didn't know
19:20Whether to tell you or not
19:21I didn't really know what to do
19:22It was like bothering me
19:23So I kind of went to Saffron
19:24And was like
19:25What do you think
19:26I should do in this situation?
19:27And she was like
19:28You have to tell Harry
19:29I just didn't know
19:30When the right time was
19:31Like, it's an over breakfast
19:32In front of everyone
19:33It's not ideal
19:34But I felt like
19:35I was avoiding you
19:36Around the hotel
19:37Towards the end
19:38Because I didn't know
19:39How to face you
19:40My loyalties have changed
19:41I didn't know about
19:42Mercedes
19:43She didn't know the full extent
19:44Junaid only told me that
19:45It was just one of those things
19:47Like, do we add salt
19:48Into a wound?
19:49Like, do we hurt you
19:50Even more than
19:51What you were already hurt?
19:52Listen
19:53Listen
19:54I'm not upset
19:55I'm not upset
19:56No, you're done
19:57I feel sick
19:58Yeah
19:59I feel sick
20:00It was a matter of days
20:01After we got back from Cyprus
20:02That they slept together
20:03The thing is
20:04Remember I met Junaid
20:05Up in Brentwood High Street
20:06Yeah
20:07And I asked him
20:08Crystal clear then
20:09He said no
20:10He's not going to admit it then
20:11He's not going to admit it
20:12He said no
20:13And then Joe
20:14Remember I'd written him a letter
20:15And Joe wrote me a letter back
20:16Joe's letter
20:17I was loyal to you
20:18Our whole relationship
20:19They've both
20:20Full on lied to me
20:21And then come to Bali
20:22And call me
20:23A fucking
20:24Voldemort
20:25The one who can't
20:26Who can't be named
20:27Yeah
20:32Listen, once upon a time
20:33Me and him
20:34Did have a friendship
20:35And
20:36But you were single
20:37In my eyes
20:38Yeah
20:39So I don't feel like
20:40Listen, I get like
20:41Yes, you were with my friend
20:42But you were single
20:43And at the end of the day
20:44When you are gay
20:45And there's a connection there
20:46With someone
20:47You have to take it
20:48I have to take it, Joe
20:49Of course
20:50This is all I've ever wanted
20:51In my whole life
20:52Anyone that's known me
20:53This is the one thing
20:54That was the missing piece
20:55Of my life
20:56And I went with it
20:57And yeah, unfortunately
20:58It's made people
20:59It's caused destruction
21:00Along the way
21:01But this happened
21:02Seven months ago
21:03And now it's done
21:04The chapter's closed
21:05Which I mean
21:06We're focusing on me and you now
21:07For me
21:08I don't regret it
21:09Because I'm over the moon
21:10That we're together
21:11Yeah
21:12Like, I'm actually
21:13Really happy for once
21:14But it's just a shame
21:15That all this negative shit
21:16Is coming in the way of it
21:18And I don't want it
21:19To affect us
21:20God
21:21And I know it ain't
21:22Going to affect us
21:23Because we are so strong
21:24But it's just hard
21:25Like
21:26It's a mess
21:27It's all just such a mess
21:28I just don't even know
21:29What we're going to do now
21:30I feel like it's
21:31We're in the worst position
21:32I don't even know
21:33What we was when we got here
21:38When this calms down
21:40Because this
21:41You will be sad
21:42This is good for no one
21:43Especially you
21:44I think
21:45The best thing to do
21:46Is speak to Joe
21:48Just say to him
21:49Joe
21:50We're adults
21:51Let's talk about this properly
21:53You have that conversation
21:54And you just get clarity
21:55And closure
21:56I don't want to
21:57I'm in Bali
21:58Yeah, but listen
21:59I didn't want this to be a thing
22:00No, but listen
22:01We can't
22:03We can't
22:04Live on the other side of the hotel
22:05While they went on that side of the hotel
22:06We can't predict
22:07What's going to happen
22:08And it's happened
22:09We need to move forward
22:10I feel like
22:11It will surprise you
22:12How good it will make you
22:13How much better you'll feel
22:14After having a conversation with them
22:15It will surprise you
22:16At the minute
22:17I don't know
22:18It doesn't just happen today
22:19It could happen in a few days
22:20It could happen in a week
22:21It could happen back
22:22When we're home
22:23Whenever
22:24But I feel like
22:25It will do you
22:26So good
22:27You'll feel so much better
22:28Out of coming
22:29From a conversation with them
22:30And hearing genuine apologies
22:31If they do give you that
22:32And you can finally
22:33Put that to bed
22:34I just feel like you need it
22:35I think
22:36What we should do now
22:37Go and sit round the pole
22:38Get a drink
22:39Yeah
22:40And just
22:41Yeah
22:42Just breathe a minute
22:43Sounds like heaven
22:44Got indigestion terribly now
22:45Danny, please
22:46Just come here
22:47Love you
22:48So much
22:49I know that won't ease you at all
22:50No, and
22:51I'm so regretful
22:52For you not understanding
22:53How I feel
22:54I do appreciate it
22:55Kiss
22:56You're going to be alright now
22:57Honestly
22:58This is it
22:59I feel like I'm in Cyprus again
23:00No
23:02I swear to you now
23:03Listen
23:04We'll get you a large Prosecco
23:05Anything you need
23:06I was just
23:07I was just
23:08I was just drunk
23:09In my mind
23:10The only way is up
23:11The only way is up
23:12The only way is up
23:13The only way is up
23:14The only way is up
23:15The only way is up
23:16The only way is up
23:17The only way is up
23:18The only way is up
23:19The only way is up
23:20The only way is up
23:21The only way is up
23:22The only way is up
23:23The only way is up
23:24The only way is up
23:25The only way is up
23:26The only way is up
23:27The only way is up
23:28The only way is up
23:29The only way is up
23:30The only way is up
23:32Go Mali baby!
23:40Mali baby
23:59You can hear the ocean with us
24:02That looks like a vagina doesn't it
24:04Whose vagina does that look like?
24:05Not mine
24:08Can you hear anything?
24:09Mermaid
24:10You're joking
24:11The singing
24:12The whales
24:13Listen to the whales
24:17Oh my god
24:18It's so good
24:19Make a wish in it
24:21Tell John to propose
24:25Give me one more
24:27I wish for my family to be healthy
24:29Same
24:32I want to take that home
24:33Yeah it's gorgeous
24:34That'd be nice on a mantelpiece
24:37Girls!
24:38Hi girls!
24:40It is extremely hot I'm melting
24:42I'm wet all over
24:44You've got a wet minge haven't you
24:46I'm sweating in all parts of the body
24:49I'm sorry girls I'm sorry
24:51Why don't you pull your skirt up?
24:52I've got to wear her out
24:55Can we discuss what happened at breakfast yesterday?
24:59Because we were so far away
25:00We didn't even realise that Joe and Jade walked out the room
25:03I've never experienced a breakfast so crazy in all my life
25:06That was intense
25:08Do you know what makes me die?
25:09Jade walked in being sassy like
25:11Harry I hear you've got something to say to me
25:13It's like Jade do you have something to say to him?
25:15Like what are you doing?
25:17You're playing the victim constantly
25:18The boys have done Harry wrong
25:20And they're acting as if Harry's done something wrong to them
25:22Joe you're a cheat own it
25:24You're a fucking cheat
25:25Yeah but that's why
25:26Because I've got a guilt conscience
25:28If anything they should be like
25:30Fuck no but now we're together we're happy
25:32And then if they said that
25:33We can all just accept and move on
25:35I think that Harry has
25:3799% found his closure on his own
25:40And healed on his own
25:41Just made him realise he wasn't going crazy
25:43Exactly
25:44He was asking about it for a long time
25:46He was always questioning it
25:47Now he knows and he can close that door and move on
25:49And it's really weird as soon as it happened
25:51And he found out
25:52Within like 24 hours I felt like he was like
25:54Moving on with Freddie a little bit more
25:56Well I mean he was kissing Freddie
25:58But only a couple hours later
26:00He's had his tongue down Freddie's throat
26:02Oh my god I've got the video
26:04Me and Chloe got front row
26:05No you haven't
26:06I stood there staring at them
26:07I didn't know you had a video
26:08I took a sneaky video of their first kiss
26:12It looks like a good kiss
26:13It's a proper passionate kiss
26:14Oh my god
26:16Who's like got the upper hand here?
26:18Harry
26:19Harry's so masculine there
26:20Oh my god
26:21How long's this video?
26:22It's still going on
26:23The video's like 4 minutes long
26:26To be fair there was a lot of tension there
26:28Like I wasn't sure before if that would be
26:30A thing
26:31A thing yeah
26:32There was a lot of sexual tension there
26:33I'm gonna be honest
26:34I felt it was a bit like Freddie was like
26:36Hungry
26:37And he wanted to like
26:38Eat Harry's face
26:39I feel like Harry wants to eat that
26:41And he was a lot of like
26:42Saliva
26:43They were both looking at each other
26:44Just to be like shall we kiss?
26:46One of them was going to the other one like
26:47Oh you've got such a good body
26:51Honestly it's the heaps
26:53Weirdly Harry seems to be having the best trip
26:56He deserves a good time
26:57He does
26:58Holiday romance is just so fun
27:15How beautiful is it here?
27:17Nice isn't it?
27:18It's stunning
27:19All the gays and the girls out
27:20I know
27:21A bit without him
27:22Excuse me guys
27:23This is your drink
27:24Thank you
27:26You're welcome
27:27And this as well
27:28Alright
27:29Thank you
27:30Thank you so much
27:31You're welcome
27:32Thank you
27:33Cheers
27:34Cheers
27:35What we cheesing to?
27:36What do you want to cheese to?
27:37Cheese to our little kiss
27:41Freddie that's too funny
27:43We weren't really a little one was it?
27:45Freddie
27:47You literally had your tongue down my throat
27:49I couldn't help myself out
27:50It was fun
27:51One thing led to another
27:53And I was just like come here
27:55I'm going to be honest with you
27:56Go on
27:57Surprisingly good
27:58It was a good kiss
28:00People were winding me up
28:01And going like
28:02Oh you're going to kiss Freddie
28:04You're going to kiss Freddie
28:05And I was going no no
28:06That's not going to happen
28:07That's not going to happen
28:08Literally blink of an eye
28:09I got my tongue down your throat
28:10Next thing you know
28:11We're playing tonsil
28:12Now what's it called?
28:13Tonsil tennis
28:14No
28:15Tensil tonic
28:16No what's it called?
28:17What are they called?
28:18What?
28:19What you have out?
28:20Tonsils
28:21Tonsil tennis
28:23But you know what?
28:25It felt natural didn't it?
28:27It did yeah
28:28It was a great kiss
28:29And once I had a taste of it
28:32I just kept on going in for more
28:34Flirty friends that kiss
28:35Flirty friends that kiss
28:37Maybe a cuddle
28:38Love a cuddle
28:40So do I
28:41How do you feel about
28:43Everything that happened at breakfast yesterday?
28:46It made me realise that
28:48Things are still so raw
28:50Well the thing is
28:52The reason why it's so raw
28:53Is because you found out new information
28:55And it brings all that hurt back up
28:57Yeah
28:58It don't hurt anymore
28:59It's just disappointing
29:00But the thing is
29:01It is okay if it does hurt
29:02Because if I found out 6 months later
29:04That someone was having it off with my best mate
29:06And my fella
29:07Yeah
29:08That would wind me
29:09That's why I got
29:10So irate
29:11I've told them boys
29:12Time and time again age
29:14To take accountability for their actions
29:16And I didn't feel like they was
29:17And I'm exhausted from it
29:18For me
29:19Junaid is like
29:22But if Joe wanted to sit down
29:24And tell me it
29:25I would listen
29:26Can I be honest with you?
29:27Yeah
29:28I really do think
29:29A conversation needs to happen
29:30Between you and Joe
29:31And listen
29:32Even if you've got any
29:33Unanswered questions
29:34Ask them
29:35Ask anything you want
29:36Get it all off your chest
29:37Yeah
29:38And then you can just
29:39Close that book
29:40Do you know what I mean?
29:41Yeah
29:42That's the thing
29:43That I can't work out
29:44That you both
29:45Done me so wrong
29:46Fucking where's
29:47My wizard wand
29:48When I need it
29:49Oi you
29:51You will not be seeing that
29:52Anytime soon
29:53No
29:54We're friends who
29:55Kiss
29:56And cuddle
29:57But no sex
29:58I don't cut out
30:00You with me
30:01Just not yet
30:04It's fun
30:05What's fun?
30:06Is that your way
30:07Of trying to kiss me again?
30:08Why did you wanna?
30:16We've done it again
30:21Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na
30:22Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na
30:23Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na
30:24Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na
30:25Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na
30:26Are we done?
30:31You alright Joe?
30:32How are you stealth, you alright?
30:34Yeah, how you been?
30:36I'm alright
30:37Can I sit?
30:38Yeah
30:39You sure?
30:40Yeah, come sit down
30:46How are you feeling?
30:48Well
30:49I'm a bit taken back, to be honest with you, huh?
30:51Did you understand, though? Cos there was a lot of shouting.
30:54I don't know if you... Well, this is the thing.
30:56I don't know what I was apologising for. Yeah.
30:58I was so confused to what was going on.
31:00Even what has been said isn't very accurate.
31:04What part?
31:05Everyone thinks me and Junaid slept together in Cyprus.
31:10Oh, no, no, no, they don't think that.
31:12So what is it? What is it that people are thinking?
31:14That you kissed in Cyprus and then,
31:17before you broke it off with Harry, you'd already slept together?
31:21Let me just tell you the actual truth on what has actually happened.
31:25So, in Cyprus, me and Junaid,
31:28I wouldn't even personally call it a kiss.
31:30It was a peck.
31:32When two lips meet, it's a kiss. No, look, it really wasn't like that.
31:35So, how was the sex, then? Cos all of a sudden it got...
31:37There was no sex. There was no sex, Daphne.
31:39If there was, I would tell you...
31:40But the sex definitely happened before you called it off with Harry?
31:43Yes. No, it did happen.
31:44But when I slept with Junaid for the first time... Yeah.
31:46..I knew, for me, it was done, there was no going back,
31:50and when I see him, it was going to be ended anyway.
31:52Yeah, but, Joe, you can carry on saying that.
31:55At the end of the day, Harry wasn't done.
31:57So you have cheated on Harry.
31:59Well, yeah, from his point of view. In yourself, morally,
32:01you might not think it's cheating and it was done, but you have cheated.
32:04It annoys me, cos I just feel like...
32:06Obviously, Harry's told his point of view to everyone,
32:08and I feel like everyone hates me because of me breaking up with him.
32:12It angers me, cos I think you weren't perfect in that relationship.
32:14But you're missing the point, and it's so hard to get through to you.
32:17Tell me what the point is, cos I'm obviously not getting it.
32:19You went off with his best friend. Yeah, and I know that's wrong.
32:22And you cheated on him. I know it's wrong.
32:23If you know it's wrong, you can't keep... Cos it is winding me up.
32:26You can't keep telling me, it's wrong, it's wrong, it's wrong,
32:28but then, Harry done this.
32:30I know the relationship weren't perfect.
32:32I'm saying that. I feel like it's not coming across like that, though.
32:34What do you want me to say?
32:35No, not you, but I just feel like, in general, cos it hurts.
32:38I'm here on holiday with everyone and, like, everyone hates me for it.
32:41Hate's a strong word.
32:42They dislike you because of what has gone on,
32:45and it's been very deceitful.
32:47Yeah, I just don't even know...
32:50Oh, it's just so draining, Saf.
32:53I'm over it.
32:54Hello. Hello.
32:55How are you? It's a boy in white.
32:57You OK? Yeah.
32:59How was your swim? Lovely.
33:01Oh, where have you been?
33:02Oh, I just needed a breather.
33:04Mm. What you's been talking about?
33:07Listen, we've had a good chat.
33:08We've just gone over the whole breakfast saga.
33:11It weren't great for anyone at all.
33:14Yeah, the whole thing's just upsetting, but it is what it is.
33:18Look, I've got an idea.
33:20I'm arranging a night away.
33:22Where? Ubud.
33:24Who's going? Me, you, Bex, and I think I'm going to ask Ella,
33:28cos I think you need to talk to Ella properly.
33:30Yeah, that'd be nice. And she is upset.
33:32Yeah, that'd be, hopefully, a good step forward.
33:35We're going to rebuild in the rice fields.
33:39Let's do it.
33:41MUSIC PLAYS
34:00Welcome to Bamboo Inde.
34:03Hello. Oh, thank you so much.
34:07Susha.
34:09Oh, I miss Balik.
34:11You are Miss Balik. Love that.
34:14How am I going to carry this case?
34:16Hey!
34:18Hi!
34:20Do you want me to get it for you?
34:21Hi, baby!
34:23Welcome to Bali, baby!
34:25Thank you, baby. I'm so happy to be here.
34:27Right, actually, little detour.
34:29This is not the main hotel.
34:30Oh, I can't get up to it.
34:32I've got you for a calm little retreat before the madness.
34:34Love that.
34:35MUSIC PLAYS
34:41Wow, look at the pool.
34:42Oh, this is so nice.
34:44I want to dip my feet in.
34:45I can already feel the calmness coming out of me.
34:48This is all you.
34:50It's like paradise.
34:51Just arms open.
34:53Open your chest up and just deep breathe it in.
34:56Oh.
34:57We rebuild in the rice fields.
35:03We're in Trim Trim.
35:06Yeah!
35:07Let's go.
35:09Hi, my Trim.
35:10Oh, wow!
35:11MUSIC PLAYS
35:12I'm so impressed.
35:13I'm excited.
35:14I'm excited.
35:15Let's have a look at this room.
35:16Oh, beautiful, babe.
35:17Wow.
35:18Look at that, babe.
35:19Isn't it lovely?
35:20Stunning.
35:21This is so nice.
35:22I actually love it up here.
35:23I feel like I'm in the rainforest,
35:24but it's like luxury rainforest.
35:25Do you know what I mean?
35:26It's going to be good.
35:27It is.
35:28It's going to be perfect.
35:29Yeah, we'll get some good kicks.
35:30We're going to have a laugh.
35:31We will.
35:32And we're going to have a gossip.
35:33Why?
35:34What have we got to gossip about?
35:35A lot.
35:36Oh.
35:37I'm happy to be away from everyone else.
35:38Yeah, you need to breathe a vibe.
35:39Oh, it's awkward, darling.
35:40I was literally...
35:41You just took the words out of my mouth.
35:42It's awkward.
35:43I feel like I can't even look at Ella.
35:44No, I know.
35:45I just want to be like,
35:46can we just be friends?
35:47I think Saffron has full intentions
35:48of making it all right.
35:49I know.
35:50Let's just hope, bro.
35:51I'm trusting her.
35:52I'm putting my full trust in Saffron.
35:53Woo-hoo!
35:54Woo-hoo-hoo!
35:55Essex has arrived to Paris!
35:56Yeah!
35:57Woo!
35:58MUSIC PLAYS
35:59Woo-hoo!
36:00Woo-hoo!
36:01Woo-hoo!
36:02Woo-hoo!
36:03Woo-hoo!
36:04Woo-hoo!
36:05Woo-hoo!
36:06Woo-hoo!
36:07MUSIC CONTINUES
36:19PHONE RINGS
36:22Hey!
36:23What's happening?
36:24Oh, someone's looking bronzed.
36:27It's a little bit toasty out here, mate.
36:29You're a bit golden pink.
36:30It goes brown, mate. It goes brown.
36:31Yes, it does.
36:32It does. That's all that matters.
36:34Mate, you look like a guy
36:35who's got care in the world.
36:37Yeah, we're going to be chilling in this beach club for a bit and then I think we're all going to a club later.
36:42Us and I think it's Girlband.
36:44You and Girlband?
36:46I don't know.
36:47You just going to hang about with Mike's girlfriend the whole trip or?
36:50Listen, they want a party. I want a party.
36:52That has become your crew now.
36:54It's not my crew, it's just like a holiday friendship romance.
36:57It's like we're just here on holiday, we're just going to enjoy our company while we're here, we're going back to normal.
37:01Nah, Dan's not here making it awkward, we can all hang about.
37:03Yeah, I've been having a great time, mate.
37:07Yeah, but have you actually been having a good time?
37:09I have. Obviously, I go up and down sometimes in how I'm feeling, which is just normal.
37:16Have you spoke to her much?
37:17Yeah.
37:18So what's she saying? Is it just normal chat when you speak to her?
37:21She's saying she misses me, obviously there's stuff to sort out, like what are we doing here?
37:26Are we leaving this? Are we not leaving this?
37:28We're flipping flopping between what we're saying to each other, do you know what I mean?
37:32Do you feel like it's cleared your head at all having any time apart from her?
37:35It's definitely made a difference, because what we were doing, we were just seeing each other every weekend anyway.
37:39So I think once I get home, that's going to be it, isn't it? It's going to be, are we going to do this or not?
37:44Yeah, you need to have a chat when you get home.
37:46I'm not going to deny that I don't miss her, I don't. 100% don't.
37:48Yeah, well I knew you would.
37:50Yeah, especially when you're coming back to the same place where we was obviously madly in love.
37:54Obviously I miss her, do you know what I mean? But it's been alright.
37:57I feel like every time I spoke to you, I feel like you're sweet.
38:00I feel sweet. I'm not like moping around the hotel not knowing what I'm doing, do you know what I mean?
38:06So what's happening with you and Ella? You're obviously going to start taking that seriously, because she's getting quite old.
38:10I feel like I am taking it quite seriously at the moment.
38:13So out here, she's been absolutely lovely. She fucking cares about you a lot, I'll tell you that.
38:17I'll be honest, yeah. I've seen a very different side to her.
38:20She's been very supportive of everything I'm doing back home. I've spoke to her non-stop.
38:24It seems to me, from an outside point of view, and I never really say this, it seems a little bit like love.
38:30Maybe. Maybe.
38:32I know that feeling. I had that feeling.
38:35You still have that feeling, yeah.
38:37I still do have that feeling.
38:38You do. Well look, it's good to see you in high spirits still anyway.
38:41I'll see you in a bit.
38:42Go on, enjoy yourself. I'll speak to you later.
38:44I love you, mate.
38:45I love you, mate. Bye.
38:46Bye.
38:54Back around, back around.
38:57Back around, back around.
39:00Love is coming back around.
39:03Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
39:05Hi, how are you?
39:06Good.
39:07You OK?
39:08You OK?
39:10I am shattered.
39:11Cheers, darling.
39:12How are you?
39:13Welcome to Bali.
39:14Cheers. Welcome to Bali.
39:15Yay, back to Bali.
39:16I mean, you've arrived definitely fashionably late.
39:18Oh, babe.
39:19And you missed an hour.
39:20Do you know what? My dad's had to have an operation. You know, obviously.
39:22Is he OK?
39:23Yeah, he's fine now.
39:24So that's why I'm a little bit late.
39:25The vibes here are so much better than the vibes in the hotel, darling.
39:29Why?
39:30Oh, the vibes in the hotel, Bex.
39:31Why?
39:32Why?
39:33Where do we even start from?
39:34What's been going on?
39:35Well, breakfast was the biggest thing.
39:36That was like absolute.
39:38Right, set the scene.
39:39We walked in, sat down, got the breakfast.
39:41Yeah.
39:42It started off quite nice.
39:43But you know when you can feel tension sitting here?
39:46What do you mean?
39:47It was just awkward.
39:48We could just feel like eyes and like whispers.
39:50And I was just like, no, get me out of this.
39:52So we were just like, we're going to make a dash exit.
39:54What, so you just left?
39:55Yeah, pretty much.
39:56Literally 10 minutes in.
39:57It gets so much worse, right?
39:58What?
39:59So we've got Saffron and Ella chasing us.
40:01They're like, you need to come back in here and like say sorry.
40:04Say sorry to who?
40:05Well, to Harry.
40:06But the truth of the matter is,
40:08I slept with Junaid before officially breaking up with Harry.
40:11But for me, it was done.
40:12It was over.
40:13There was no going back.
40:14No.
40:15No, but like, we had just come back from Cypress
40:17and I knew I was breaking up with him regardless.
40:19The next time I saw him, it was going to be done.
40:21I was going to end it.
40:22So I was mentally single.
40:24Danny obviously knew because I did tell Danny when it happened.
40:27Yeah.
40:28And obviously Danny told Harry and everyone found out.
40:30So obviously you can imagine what it was like Christmas number two.
40:33And now we've heard.
40:34Now we've heard.
40:35Freddie and Harry are cracking on.
40:36And kissed.
40:37What?
40:38We're confused, I think, more so than anything.
40:40But at the end of the day, we don't care.
40:42It makes it awkward now though because it's like,
40:44how can we be friends with Freddie while he's cracking on with Harry?
40:48It ain't going to happen.
40:50And the truth's now out there,
40:52but I think Harry needs to hear the truth from me
40:55so he can finally just put this all to bed.
40:57What, you're going to have a conversation with him out here?
40:59To be honest with you, I probably owe it to him
41:02and just let him know the timeline of events, how it happened.
41:06He's not going to like it, but then how can...
41:08Oh, he's so awkward.
41:09But he's cracking on with Freddie though,
41:10so I don't really feel like he can have the ump anymore.
41:12Yeah, but babe, you got with Janaye, Joe.
41:15It's like, do you know what I mean?
41:17And it's awkward.
41:18After that conversation though, we can just hopefully move on.
41:22I hope so.
41:23Shall we just cheers to being in Bali?
41:25Cheers to blossoming friendships, eh?
41:29I need another drink.
41:30Same.
41:32Let's get another.
41:33Let's get another.
41:49Right, Saffi?
41:51Elsie!
41:52She's all blissful.
41:54Oh, we're in paradise, though.
41:55Oh, it's lovely, innit?
41:56You coming in?
41:57Of course I am.
41:59I ain't got miles of motorbikes.
42:01Oh, it's lovely.
42:02I'm so hot.
42:03I've been hot the whole time,
42:04but actually this is really good on the soul, this place.
42:07I mean, it's peaceful.
42:08You feel calm?
42:09Yeah, calmer than what I've felt since being here.
42:12So what you thinking? I mean, the boys are here.
42:15Yeah.
42:16Look, listen, it's one of them things, ain't it?
42:18Like, it's nice to be around them,
42:20cos we ain't been around them, but it's awkward.
42:22I thought obviously inviting her would try and help away from the madness.
42:27Like, talk to them on your own.
42:29It's all about rebuilding now.
42:31Yeah, well, let's hope so, eh?
42:33I mean, we weren't that calm the other night, was we?
42:36No, not at all.
42:37And I don't regret it,
42:38cos I feel like the things that we said,
42:40like, they needed to be said.
42:42Yeah.
42:43Do you know what I mean?
42:44But it's just hard to see Joe in such a state.
42:46Yeah. Oh, yeah, he's really upset.
42:47And it'd still be hard.
42:48He was saying it again when I spoke to him around the pole.
42:51About you.
42:52Yeah.
42:53Like, I do feel a loss in a friendship, do you know what I mean?
42:56Yeah.
42:57Like, I'd be heartless if I said that I didn't care.
42:59Like, I do care.
43:00Oh, yeah, it's normal.
43:01It's just one of them things.
43:02Do I just do it for me instead of pleasing everyone else?
43:05Well, yeah.
43:06Cos at the minute I feel like I'm holding grudges
43:08cos I'm trying to please everyone.
43:10Is that why you don't seem yourself?
43:12Has it just all got too much?
43:13Yeah, I just feel so in the middle of everything.
43:15Like, I want to be amicable with him.
43:17Yeah.
43:18But I also don't want to upset Danni either.
43:20Yeah.
43:21Like, I know what happened and what they did to her was so wrong.
43:23Yeah.
43:24And I also don't want to lose her as a friend
43:26cos I lost her as a friend for not having her back before.
43:28Yeah.
43:29But when I think, like, I just think to myself,
43:31I am missing Danni a lot.
43:32And, like, we speak every minute of the day on the phone.
43:34Yeah.
43:35And he wakes up for me and whatever else, and it's nice.
43:37I get messages from him saying,
43:39patiently waiting for you to wake up, it's good.
43:41Ah.
43:42But I think that I might want to go home.
43:45What?
43:46I think that I want to go home.
43:48Oh, don't...
43:49Oh, come on, now.
43:50I feel like it's wrapped up in everything and, like...
43:53It's got... Yeah, it's got too much.
43:55And you miss him.
43:59And he almost, like, might break away from it all, shall I be?
44:02Yeah.
44:03Yeah, and also I think you're finding probably pressure around girl band
44:07I feel uneasy. Yeah.
44:09And I just think, like, Fred ain't even taking a minute out of his day
44:12to even ask me how I am cos he's so caught up in all that shit.
44:16Yeah, you ain't seen yourself for a couple of days.
44:19You've just been quiet.
44:21I just want to go home.
44:24Oh, come on, Elsie.
44:27She's alone. Come on.
44:30I feel sad, Sam.
44:32I feel sad, Sam.
44:58Next time...
45:00He loves me, don't he?
45:03What is it? Go on, talk to me.
45:06I am getting closer to Harry
45:08and I don't think them two are going to like it.
45:10So what if they don't like it?
45:11Joe did cheat on me.
45:13What? You're joking.
45:14Well, when?
45:15Sight for it.
45:16We've all got to be around each other.
45:18Yeah, of course.
45:19And I don't want to see you and Jonaid on your own.
45:22Ella's actually really in the middle of a lot of stuff.
45:24Yeah.
45:25I'm looking at you in your eyes. I'm messed up.
45:27No, I'm sorry. I don't want to lose you.
45:29You both played a part in this.
45:31What do you mean?
45:32You both weren't perfect.
45:36I'm not doing this.
45:37Wait, Harry.
45:38Why?
45:39Why?
45:57So you don't love me now?