The Minecraft/Shrek DISASTER.

Metatube

☆Socials: ➥ Gaming Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoeBartGames ➥ Vod Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-lfGGqb5hHLBqVnVnWyrsw ➥Philosophy Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@Joe-Bart-Philosophy ➥Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/joe_bartolozzi ➥Twitter: https://twitter.com/joebartolozzi_?lang=en  Editor: ➥@Jdyo  Thumbnails: https://twitter.com/KangWitK  ☆Discord: ➥ https://discord.gg/joebart  Outro Song:  @PlayaPhonkOfficial   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1oC_WYWJx9A

Transcript

00:00We have two trailers we're watching that we're getting into the reacts that we got to do the mecha uh game minecraft movie

00:06The final trailer. I don't know when this fully comes out. Does it say in theaters april 4th?

00:11So honestly very soon seeing that it's at the time of this, you know stream february 28th minecraft movie final trailer

00:19We did not like the first one. I ended up making a youtube video about the first one and I didn't think I love jack black

00:26I didn't think the jack black casting as steve was a very good idea. He doesn't really fit the

00:31Stoic personality that steve is supposed to have steve is a stoic swedish

00:38Uh, man, that doesn't really talk and now we're having an energetic outgoing

00:43extroverted jack black

00:45Who is like 50 years old playing a like 25 year old man?

00:50It doesn't really make sense. I coupled with the animation kind of looking

00:54Terrifying obviously, it's like irl minecraft so I don't dislike it that much

00:58We haven't even clicked play. But I mean look at these fucking pandas dude. This is this is

01:04scary

01:17All right, I quit that all right, all right, all right, all right, they're roping me in they're bringing in some

01:22They're bringing in some minecraft gamer terminology

01:26I'm liking that the mlg water bucket

01:33In the overworld

01:36Anything you can dream about?

01:38You know what really annoys me though. They need to just start killing villagers in this or something. Okay

01:44every person that ever plays minecraft

01:47Goes on a killing rampage

01:49and I

01:51I'm, just saying you're murdering every animal the second you spawn into minecraft. You're killing every animal in sight

01:58You're

01:59literally all of them you're

02:02enslaving at putting it very

02:05Forward and bluntly when you play minecraft you've effectively enslaved villagers

02:10Force them to reproduce to give the outcomes that you want and then you keep them in a one by one box

02:15So you can infinitely trade them mending books like your villagers are tortured in minecraft in the minecraft game

02:24countlessly murdered

02:26Incest is everywhere anything you can dream about

02:31You can create so they built all this

02:34Yeah, most of it. Oh that

02:37That thing doesn't understand a word. You're saying we're talking

02:42Life here was perfect

02:44Until one day

02:46flint and steel

02:47We came across

02:49the nether

02:51And I want

02:52I want

02:53One of them to die like permanently

02:57This should be hardcore minecraft. That's how they should map this movie

03:03Hardcore minecraft and like dude hard pivot start out the movie jack black comes in

03:10He's like talking about how nice the world is blah blah blah

03:13Out of nowhere this little fucking jackass right here opens a door to a dark room creeper

03:22Boom blows him up flesh everywhere, right? I'm talking gore

03:28terrifier level gore

03:30And everybody's face drops and they just go

03:35And then and then jack black explains this is hardcore minecraft blah blah blah

03:39You only have one life you're gonna die if you die you're gone forever. Sorry. I didn't mention that and then they move forward

03:49A place with no joy or creativity at all. Yeah, what are you making? Oh

03:57If they get their way this beautiful world and everything in it will wither and die

04:09Why do I like that animation the least the piglins honestly don't bother me I think they look fairly accurate

04:18Like a weird hairy pig on two feet. The zombie looks weird. The skeleton doesn't bother me. That looks bad

04:27You know, what's hilarious though is this is gonna be like, you know, how we all found like courage the cowardly dog scary

04:34Like what's like childhood movies that we found scary when we were kids

04:38Like yeah, coralline and shit. This is gonna be like their like

04:42Gen alpha's version of that like if I was like seven years old, this would be genuinely horrifying to me

04:48I remember minecraft being a horror game. I used to watch I would remember six years old six seven years old

04:55I is how old I think I was I remember I walked

04:59past my cousin

05:01And he was on his laptop playing like og minecraft

05:05in a cave

05:06pitch black

05:08cave sounds

05:10non-stop

05:11And it had that fog

05:13That was over everything. They got rid of that

05:16I don't know why they got rid of that because that was a great part of minecraft how fucking creepy it made everything

05:24They made it too kiddish because when you used to play minecraft

05:26It would have that like you could see like four feet in front of you. It was terrifying

05:31Biocon deus

05:34It means goodbye brother. No, it doesn't

05:37Oh, they're making it too funny and it's not funny

05:41it's it feels like i'm watching a dwayne johnson movie and it's like

05:46They're just shoving comedy where it doesn't need to be obviously

05:49Yeah, you should make mine like the minecraft movie a little bit light-hearted and like comedic

05:54I don't know. I just don't like the I think the acting the acting cast is weird. Not even the acting cast

05:59I think these two could really do their job. But why do they have what's this guy's name? Jason momoa?

06:05Why do they have jason momoa like this with like the pit vipers and the fucking like why what what is this casting choice?

06:14It means goodbye brother. No, it doesn't don't look at her. It does

06:20If we want to save this world

06:22Creativity is key to survival

06:24Now what elytra wingsuits?

06:29Oh my

06:30Kid forgets to open the wingsuit falls to his death head splats literally gore

06:35boom

06:36That's a good fucking film

06:38Increase the number of people in the movie have like 10 characters that don't matter

06:45Just die in in very comedic ways that you die in minecraft

06:50When you fall you fall to your death in minecraft you get blown up by a creeper like other random shit. It's a kid's movie

06:58Bro, let's be real

07:00Okay, let's be real

07:03For just one fucking minute. Okay. It's a kid's movie. It's a kid's movie

07:08I'm telling you right now go to a fucking theater look around tell me the average age of the person in your fucking movie theater

07:13It's gonna be 15 to fucking 35

07:15No, goddamn four-year-old is going to watch this fucking movie. This ain't the fucking minion movie

07:19This ain't the fucking minute

07:20This is gonna be same thing as fucking five nights at freddy's which pissed me the fuck off that they made that like pg

07:26Right, fuck that. Why are we making five nights at freddy's pg?

07:29Yeah, there's teenagers going to see it

07:31But at the end of the day, bro, no fucking six-year-old is going to see the fucking fnaf movie

07:35Make it a fucking gritty horror film make it scary, right?

07:38Why are we making it like I understand?

07:40Yeah at the end of the day with the war they really like stuck by that and it's like oh they're like the souls of the

07:45Trapped children that are in the fnaf characters, but why didn't they make it like?

07:51fucking

07:52scary

07:54And like people getting their heads ripped off and it's like rated r

07:58I'm, not saying you need the minecraft movie rated r right because minecraft minecraft as a game

08:03Isn't you know, like a fucking gory game, but still push the limits a bit more

08:09You could say it's a kids movie, but they're not doing that because oh, it's minecraft's a kids game minecraft's a kids movie

08:15But the majority of people that play minecraft like that are gonna go see this movie aren't children

08:19And then on top of that on top of that

08:22They only do that so they can pan to a fucking larger audience and make more money

08:25Which is so annoying because they know if they make it rated r right if they like for the fnaf movie

08:31I'm, not saying minecraft. They make the fnaf movie rated r

08:34They should have made minecraft rated r. That'd be hilarious. They make fnaf rated r

08:38Everybody that was gonna go see the movie is still gonna go see the movie

08:42But people that were on edge or really haven't really cared about fnaf aren't gonna go see it

08:47But if they make it a kids movie everybody's still gonna go see the movie and then they're gonna get added on customers

08:51They make more money. It's just for fuck. It's so annoying

08:55Those things work, right? Absolutely

08:57Oh

09:11Bro I got some for you throws up a fucking tnt trap

09:16With redstone she put too many tnt in the same spot one blows up and then one ricochets blows her up

09:24I mean come on

09:26This could be a fuck I don't know do I think the movie's gonna be bad

09:32I don't know

09:33But i'm just saying put me at the fucking reins of this goddamn film. I'd make i'd make some cinema

09:45Why do the piglins have tnt

09:47Oh

09:51Like are we being more accurate are we not being more accurate? How is he not dead here?

09:59Oh my gosh, i'm so sorry

10:03This place makes no sense

10:05Creeper blows up within a one block proximity of you and you have no armor

10:12I don't think you're living those. I think you should have died

10:15Oh, but it's jason babala see kill one of the fucking kill one of the the baby villagers, right?

10:21That's what we need to do

10:22We need to have a scene where jack black as steve goes

10:26We need sharpness five to beat these we need sharpness five to beat these these piglins

10:32He just starts forcing them to reproduce

10:35Ah shit trades kills them go again. Ah shit. Ah, dude fucking

10:41depth strider 2

10:43Just shanks him right right in front of the baby villagers, right and they're sitting here and they're going

10:52What's that noise they make when they're stressed out

10:56Some shit like that

10:59Yeah

11:03And then you stab him dude, they look creepy bro, they look they look scary

11:14Yeah

11:17Let's do this

11:21They want me to fight the chicken

11:25Chicken jockey

11:36I don't know bro

11:40Killing right

11:44Crushes his rib cage. He's just sitting there going

11:51No, not again

11:53Oh my god. Oh hell no

11:55Is she gonna be a main character?

11:58Is she gonna be a main character?

12:00bro

12:01bro

12:03Ah, you look like the fourth of july

12:07Are you okay? Did I hit you with my car?

12:10But oh my god, are you all right?

12:14Your head is huge

12:19Yo, he a broke-ass villager too this motherfucker got no job this motherfucker got no job talk about unemployed ass motherfucker

12:28broke-ass villager

12:30broke-ass villager bum

12:32Bum got hit by a car idiot. She dates it. Stop. Oh my god

12:38They do a romantic relationship with a villager

12:41That would be yo

12:43jaw

12:44dropped in theater if i'm sitting there and they have like a

12:49jennifer coolidge bang a villager

12:51That would be that would that would turn the movie around for me

12:55Honestly, that would be that would be the plot twist. I was looking for that'd be that'd be more of a plot twist

13:02than me watching fucking uh

13:06Barbarian and the naked incest boob monster comes out of nowhere and just fucking crushes that guy's skull

13:13next

13:14shrek 5 15 years later shrek 5

13:17Well, actually it's probably going to be 16 years later because this is the announcement of the movie not the actual release date

13:22Hey magic mirror, who's the fairest of them all? Why shrek, of course

13:33No, they're doing their illumination entertaining there's their illumination

13:38Entertaining the movie

13:40They're ruining it. They're ruining it. Ew dad

13:44See, no another thing if you're gonna go the modern movement have oh why shrek of course

13:50Pull up the one video of shrek is love shrek is life

13:57I would pay a hundred dollars to see that movie if they had that if the magic mirror pulled up a clip of

14:03shrek is love

14:05Shrek is life and it's like just literally that weird sensual video

14:11This has 333 000 dislikes. Yeah, I think there's gonna be a lot of pushback on this

14:17Ew dad

14:18Woohoo, mama like who is that?

14:22Who is this? Oh, is that one of the kids from shrek 4? Who's making this stuff?

14:31And why does shrek look like that donkey would be dead

14:35Let's just throw that out there donkey donkey would be dead. He's a fucking donkey. He's not he's not

14:4345 years old hard pivot hard pivot plot twist

14:47Pinocchio has a goon cave where he where he's in love with shrek. Why not just keep the shit animation?

14:53Why not like I don't understand

14:55Yeah, you can maybe up the quality a little bit but like keep it

15:00The same style just up the res, you know what I mean, I don't know I think they might change it

15:07You know how sonic originally was supposed to look fucking creepy

15:11And like a mole rat and they and they ended up like the sonic movie. The sonic series is such a great

15:17Like movie series, but if they kept this

15:22The film would be

15:24Horrible

15:25It would be just bad on the eyes, even if the plot was good. So, I don't know. Maybe they'll maybe they'll change it back

15:33If they get enough shit, they will that's how I see it

15:36But this is like it's it's a part of a series people really have a dedicated fan base and zendaya

15:43Oh, oh damn only in theater is zendaya the the girl

15:48What are the comments?

15:50Ha ha ha ha

15:53Oh shit

15:58That's interesting wait, do you think the minecraft movie trailer had comments we didn't read those

16:03I feel like they might have comments there. Are you sure about this? It's gonna be okay

16:07You're a hero brian hero brian. I like that name this world. This world needs a hero. We need a hero

16:12We need a hero brian

16:14I'm calling this now jennifer coolidge and the villager will fall in love

16:18Dude i'd be locked in for a gritty sex scene with jennifer coolidge and a cgi villager I would be

16:25I would be zoned dude put the popcorn down i'd put the popcorn down i'd be fucking locked in dead silent

16:32It would be that theater would go that theater would go fucking it would be like

16:37Radio silent you wouldn't people you wouldn't even hear people breathing everybody holding their breath

16:43Dude they gotta do that man. Just one day. There's gotta be like a fucking they gotta they gotta just have somebody

16:49That's directing this movie be like, yeah, we should have jennifer coolidge bang a villager. Oh

16:58Oh, and that's all she sounds like the entire time and he's just going

17:02Huh

17:11Nah

17:12Bro, that would be so fucking funny

17:15Oh my god

17:17Still believe jack and jason's castings would be way better if they flipped it

17:21I think jack. I think jack black should be in the minecraft movie. I don't think he should be steve

17:26What who did I say originally? That would be a great steve. Keanu reeves

17:31Keanu reeves would be a great steve gritty. He's just like

17:38i've been stuck here for

17:4030 years

17:41Adam sandler. I I genuinely would I love adam sandler

17:45I would not watch the minecraft movie if adam sandler was cast as steve

17:51Yeah, no, i'm still gonna watch the movie

17:53I think it'll be like an enjoyable flick

17:55Even if it's bad plot wise because it's minecraft at the end of the day and it's like a game

18:00We all grew up with

18:01but

18:02I don't know. I think they could have gone down a path. That would have been better. All right

18:07Chat first video first full video

Category

Transcript

Recommended