Nearly five years after the shocking death of 'Glee' star Naya Rivera, her ex-husband, actor Ryan Dorsey, is speaking out for the first time. Ryan reflects on the heartbreaking phone call when he was told Naya was missing on July 8, 2020, after swimming off a rental boat at Lake Piru in Ventura County, California: “I knew something bad had happened, and I feared the worst."
At just 4 years old, their son Josey was found alone on the boat and witnessed the devastating moment when his mom drowned. Ryan shares how the two have carried on after Naya's passing and how he has embraced the challenges of raising his son alone while keeping her memory alive.
At just 4 years old, their son Josey was found alone on the boat and witnessed the devastating moment when his mom drowned. Ryan shares how the two have carried on after Naya's passing and how he has embraced the challenges of raising his son alone while keeping her memory alive.
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00:00I've turned down so many of these kind of things of talking about it because it was too hard.
00:05I mean, it's still hard to talk about, but, you know, it's five years this summer,
00:09so I feel like I'm ready to talk about certain things.
00:17She called me early that morning, and I didn't answer.
00:21I didn't call her back until later.
00:23But I knew, like, if it was important, she would text.
00:27She had no problem sending me long texts about, you know, all the things.
00:31So I didn't have a text, so I went back to sleep.
00:34I was in Big Bear, and then I got a phone call, and I knew it was his grandma's husband.
00:48And so it was odd for him to call me, so I answered it, and he's like,
00:51you know, he told me, basically, he said,
01:00I said, OK. He said,
01:02Josie's OK. I'm like, all right.
01:05He's like, but they can't find Naya.
01:08And I said, what do you mean?
01:10He said, they jumped in, and Josie got back on, and they're trying to find Naya.
01:18And I instantly said, what do you mean?
01:20She knows how to swim.
01:21And he said, I don't know, but, you know, he told me what happened.
01:24And I was, like, collapsed into, like, a pallet of drinks and a Ralph's
01:29because we were looking to get meat to go barbecue.
01:32And I told my friend Billy, I said, we got to go.
01:36And I just didn't know what to think.
01:40You know, I knew something bad had happened, and, you know, I feared the worst.
01:45And I basically left.
01:48I got from Big Bear to Santa Clarita, and, like, I don't know, I drove, like,
01:52a hundred-some the whole way, like, my four-way hazards on,
01:57chain-smoking cigarettes, and I don't even smoke, really,
02:00and just crying.
02:02And, yeah, that's just kind of what I think about when it initially happened.
02:08Yeah, I just wanted to get to Josie.
02:12Yeah, it was a windy day.
02:13It's just, they didn't have an anchor.
02:15Josie said the wind was blowing.
02:24The crazy part is Josie told me, he told all of us, but he said,
02:30and he didn't tell me this for a while after, he's, like, we jumped in,
02:34and I said, are you sure about this?
02:38She's, like, yeah.
02:39He's, like, oh, my God, are we going to die?
02:41And Mommy said, don't be silly.
02:43And he said, and we jumped in, and that's what happened, you know.
02:48I guess the boat was getting away from them,
02:50and she told him to go back to the boat, and he swam back to the boat.
02:56I still can't figure out.
02:57It doesn't make much sense how he was able to get on and she wasn't.
03:00It's just crazy because I think, like, if I would have been there,
03:05I definitely would have went, and we got the boat.
03:08I probably would have jumped in.
03:10I probably would have jumped in with a life jacket.
03:14You know, did that happen for a reason why I didn't go,
03:17why I didn't answer the phone that morning,
03:19or could I have saved her if I was there?
03:22Which, you know, the hero in me thinks I would, thinks I would.
03:25Nothing would have happened.
03:27But maybe there was something crazy that happened,
03:31like these rumors of undercurrents and all this, you know, the history of the lake.
03:35So maybe it would have got both of us.
03:37I don't know.
03:39I'd like to think I would have saved the day, you know.
03:45But that's not the way the story ended,
03:47and it's just that's kind of the thing you keep second-guessing yourself.
03:53And, like, one part I'm thinking, all right, it happened because
03:57something bad could have happened to both of us.
03:59The other part I'm thinking, you know, I could have saved the day.
04:05I didn't listen to music for, like, I think it was probably three months.
04:08I was just driving around in silence.
04:11And then after the service, I drove back to West Virginia to get away
04:15because there's, like, you know, there's paparazzi following us,
04:18which is completely weird.
04:21So I went to West Virginia to, like, kind of reset.
04:25But I remember driving across the country and just complete silence,
04:29like, no music, just shaking my head,
04:33like you still can't believe, like, you know, this is life kind of thing, you know.
04:38There's certain songs that she sang on Glee, and that's the crazy part.
04:41It's like right after it happened, it seemed like you'd go into a store
04:44and, like, you'd hear these songs, and sometimes it would be her, you know,
04:49and it would just be a bit overwhelming.
04:52You'd try to keep it together, or I would just, like, walk out.
04:56You don't know if it's, like, life messing with you
04:58or if there's, like, something, some meaning behind it
05:01or if it's just, you know, coincidence.
05:03But it's still, like, it hits you different.
05:09It's kind of bizarre how we met,
05:11because neither one of us wanted to go out that night.
05:14And then her friend told me, I think it was Heather.
05:16She's like, hey, my friend thinks you're cute, go talk to her,
05:19and I'm not, like, that approaching type of guy.
05:22So I was like, okay.
05:24And so I did, and I was waiting for, like, an organic moment,
05:27and then she finally walked up and said, you know, what's your name?
05:30And then that's how we kind of started talking.
05:32And then we started dating for a bit, and then we fell out, you know, whatever.
05:36The only reason I came back in contact with her
05:38was because the girl I was talking to was, like, into astrology,
05:42and, like, she would always see these headlines
05:45or pay attention to TMZ, and she knew of our history.
05:48And she's like, oh, did you see what happened to your girl?
05:50And I forget what the drama was.
05:53But whatever she told me, I reached out.
05:55I sent an email. I was like, hey, Sol, you know, this happened.
05:58Hope you're doing all right.
05:59And she responded and was like, where are you?
06:02And so we ended up meeting up and had dinner,
06:06and that was kind of, like, the catalyst for us to starting, you know, to get back together.
06:12But it's just so funny, like, the tiniest thing, you know, in life happens.
06:16Like, someone telling you something or a simple email
06:19or someone not telling you that, like, life would be completely different.
06:24She was so brave and outspoken about the abortion story,
06:26but when you learned about that, how did you kind of, like, process it?
06:31I remember telling her, like, you know,
06:33I wish you could have thought you could have trusted me with that information
06:36so I could have helped you.
06:37It was weird because I knew that there was a little me possibility,
06:42which I'd never been in that situation,
06:44so that was kind of weird for me to, like, process.
06:48And then when we got back together, you know, we both were like,
06:50oh, this is, like, the second chance, and the world deserved,
06:54this sounds silly,
06:55but I feel like the world deserved that second chance of me and her having a kid.
07:03When we found out the sex of the baby,
07:06I've had tears of joy, like, twice in my life,
07:09well, maybe more now, but, yeah, three times.
07:12So the first time was my first job when I booked Parks and Recreation.
07:16I, like, had five lines on Parks and Rec,
07:19and the second time I had tears of joy is when they said it's a boy
07:23because I was, I just, you know, every guy wants a boy, right?
07:26And we were on the patio, and I, like, jumped up and started crying.
07:31So we were both happy.
07:33And then the other time, more tears of joy was, like, our wedding,
07:37and I've probably had some tears of joy recently,
07:40but those three were obviously the top three.
07:47I think just after COVID and after it happened,
07:52I stuck around because I wanted to keep his life somewhat as normal as I could,
07:58keep him near his friends, keep him near, you know, his other side of the family.
08:03And after a couple of years,
08:06it just didn't seem to make sense to stay here
08:09because COVID changed our industry,
08:12where, like, all the auditions were on tape.
08:15Everything was just getting more expensive,
08:19and, you know, L.A. was kind of unraveling a bit, it seemed.
08:23So I thought for the time being, let's go back to the East Coast and reset.
08:28It's a much better place, I think, to grow up as a kid.
08:32There's less worries as a parent.
08:34But who knows? Maybe we'll come back.
08:37It really depends on work and stuff.
08:39But, you know, I have a love-hate relationship with L.A.
08:42West Virginia is a different...
08:45It's just a completely different place.
08:48There's not much to do, but it feels safe.
08:51My dad's there. My mom lives in Charlotte, but she's there a lot to help out.
08:55But all my childhood friends are there.
08:58All my childhood friends with kids are there.
09:00That's part of the reason I thought it would be nice for him,
09:03because having a play date in L.A. versus West Virginia is like, you know, night and day.
09:09So, I don't know, it's been a nice change.
09:13So I'll see how long we can last there.
09:19He's done a couple plays, but he's so good.
09:22I mean, obviously, he's a natural.
09:24He hasn't had, like, the lead part or anything, but he's so good.
09:28But he wants to do what he wants to do.
09:30And he's not, like, begging to be an actor or anything.
09:34But I'm just trying to expose him to all the things.
09:36Like, he's playing violin. He's playing piano.
09:39He's in the chess club. He's pretty good at baseball.
09:43He's not very good at basketball. He's played soccer.
09:46But, like, I just want to continue to expose him to things.
09:50I think it could be an outlet for him as he gets older.
09:53He could have a good life being creative.
09:55So it's definitely in his blood.
09:57So we'll see. We'll see what happens as he gets older.
10:01The one thing that I'm trying to do in her honor
10:05is to, like, always make sure I'm throwing a banger of a birthday party for JoJo
10:09because she, you know, number one, number two, number three,
10:13and this fourth and last birthday party that she threw,
10:19they were all, like, you know, fantastic,
10:22like, well-planned, well-thought-out, themed birthday parties.
10:27So I think I've done a decent job for a couple,
10:30but the last one was not that great, you know?
10:34I don't even remember what we did.
10:36But it was his ninth birthday party.
10:38But it's number ten. I'm going to throw a blowout.
10:41And I'm hoping his cousins are going to come from Florida.
10:45Grandma's came to the last two in West Virginia.
10:49But I'm going to throw a big, big party.
10:52And I hope to be able to make her proud
10:56of being able to throw a party like she used to throw for him as he gets older.
11:01So, Annie, are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?
11:03Annie, are you okay? So, Annie, are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?
11:07His grandma showed her on TV.
11:10He wanted to watch the Glee movie.
11:12And I tried to watch it, but it's still, like, I mean, pictures are hard enough.
11:18I can't just sit there and watch her sing.
11:20And, like, you know, it's hard for me.
11:22But he sat there, and he watched the whole movie.
11:24And you could see his eyes welling up a little bit.
11:27But he's a strong boy, and he has a lot of content and episodes and stuff.
11:34Like, his mom will live forever.
11:36And I think that's, you know, a silver lining if that's a way of putting a terrible situation.
11:46Being a full-time dad, there's only so much time to, like, go out and meet people.
11:52But I'm trying to find somebody.
11:55I'm getting a lot of pressure from Josie.
11:57He tells me he wants a brother.
11:58And I say, well, what if it's a sister?
12:00He's like, no, but I want a brother.
12:02And, you know, the sad but sweet thing is he's been telling me for years now, you know, he wants a stepmom.
12:10And I'm like, well, I got to get a girlfriend first.
12:13So I'm trying.
12:15I'm trying to find, you know, that person.
12:18You know, I've been talking to someone.
12:20We'll see what happens.
12:22It's hard to find someone that you like, you know.
12:25But I think I found someone that I do like.
12:27But, you know, out of town, long-distance relationship, expecting someone to sign up for, you know, my life and his life is not easy.
12:39I mean, I think he's easy.
12:40But all of the variables is, you know, it's a lot to ask for someone.
12:45So I'm taking it one day at a time and trying to be hopeful.
12:48And I'm hoping that my single dad days are numbered, you know, because it's lonely out there trying to be a single dad and, you know, going to sleep by yourself all the time.
13:02The favorite part of the day, if I had to have one, would be just how he is such a happy kid.
13:08He wakes up happy.
13:11All the energy, you know, like there's no depression.
13:15There's no sadness with that kid.
13:17You know, he's just waking up.
13:18He's singing.
13:19He's playing, you know.
13:22He gives me a reason to keep going with my life and something to live for.
13:27My reason to breathe and, you know, be a good dad.
13:32So that's just seeing him wake up every day is the favorite part.
13:36Yeah, I think it's just getting up and raising him is part of the working through it for me.
13:44You know, trying to be the best dad, the best parent that I can be and raise a good little man one day.