Junior Taskmaster Episode 8 - Balloon Carcasses
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00:00BUZZER
00:02Right, let's go.
00:04Ah!
00:11Can you tape this to my head?
00:12Oh!
00:15Call plus call.
00:20That was quite pathetic, don't you think?
00:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
00:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
00:36Hello, and welcome to Junior Taskmaster.
00:39It's me, Rose Matufeo, and we've done it.
00:41We've made it. There have been 25 kids taking part in five heats,
00:45two semis, and it's all been leading up to this,
00:47the Junior Taskmaster Grand Final.
00:50Oh, my gosh, take it in.
00:51This is going to be the greatest night of your lives, trust me.
00:53It's all downhill from here, OK?
00:56Years from now, they're going to be at their wedding
00:58or the birth of their first child,
01:00and I bet they'll be thinking,
01:01it's still not as good as the Junior Taskmaster Grand Final.
01:05Wow, and remember how beautiful that lady who hosted it was?
01:09I wonder what she's doing now.
01:12So, at the end of tonight's show,
01:13someone will be taking home the prize to beat all prizes,
01:17a lovely statue of my head.
01:19Yeah.
01:20CHEERING
01:22Good luck explaining that to your friends
01:24who don't watch the show.
01:26Right, they're the cream of the crop,
01:27they're the angels of all angels.
01:29It is, of course, time to meet our Junior Taskmaster finalists.
01:32Please welcome Anita!
01:34CHEERING
01:36Flynn!
01:38Jamie!
01:40Noja!
01:41And Shania!
01:44Wow.
01:46And finally, my intrepid assistant.
01:48I literally couldn't do this job without him
01:50because he is the only one who knows the passcode to that iPad.
01:54It's Mike Wozniak!
01:55CHEERING
01:58Thank you, Rose.
02:01Ultimately, of course, this is really a show
02:02about the dangers of danger.
02:04Always steer clear of the top three causes of danger,
02:07which are, of course, accidents, hazards and men in their 20s.
02:12And if you're ever in a situation where you're offered elbow pads,
02:15put them on.
02:17All right, Mike, please tell me what tonight's prize task is.
02:20Well, Rose, for the final prize task of the series,
02:23our survivors have been asked to bring in the most unusual thing
02:25that begins with a J, a T or an M,
02:28in honour, needless to say,
02:29of the Journal of Transnational Macroeconomics.
02:32Although those items can be anything beginning with those letters
02:35and don't have to relate to GDP, inflation or, of course...
02:39foreign exchange rates. Thank you, children.
02:42Tonight's winner will not only take home the Junior Taskmaster
02:45golden bonce, but will also acquire all five unusual things.
02:48I wish you all the very best of luck.
02:50Let's start with Anita.
02:52What have you brought in for your prize task tonight?
02:54Mike. What?
02:56Mike the Headless Chicken.
03:01So, Mike the Headless Chicken was a chicken who was butchered,
03:06but whoever butchered him did a terrible job
03:09because they left the brain stem intact
03:11and the brain stem caused him to live on another 18 months.
03:17So, scientists were able to discover that a chicken only needs
03:20the heart, the brain stem and food and water to survive.
03:28Wow.
03:3218 months. So, you only need those things to survive.
03:35Well, a chicken. Oh, sorry. Yes, I did get you.
03:39Anita, that was fantastic. Thank you so much for that explanation.
03:41Rather unusual.
03:42All righty, moving on to Gwen.
03:45Now, you made it through all by the skin of your milk teeth.
03:48You got the same amount of points
03:49as fellow contestant Scarlett,
03:51so it had to go to a tie-break task, which you can watch online.
03:55OK, what have you brought in, Gwen?
03:57Right, so, the most unusual item, beginning with J-T-M,
04:02is toilet paper, but with Mike's face on it.
04:05I want to see this.
04:06Oh!
04:09I mean, wow.
04:11That's...
04:16So, in particular, why did you choose Mike's face here, Gwen?
04:19Well, I was going to put your face on it as well,
04:21but I thought you might be, like, a bit offended
04:23by the toilet paper's destiny.
04:26Like...
04:29Whereas I would be honoured?
04:32I can't tell what I'd rather wipe myself with.
04:35Mike's face or my own face?
04:39Er, I think you chose them right.
04:41Enjoyed that, Gwen. Thank you very, very much.
04:42OK, now, Jamie, what have you brought in today?
04:45Trousers.
04:46OK. Yeah.
04:49Why are trousers at all unusual?
04:53OK.
04:55Do you own trousers yourself?
04:57No. No.
04:59When in public, it's just rain, trousers are wet,
05:02wet legs, can't dry them.
05:04But when you're wearing shorts, yeah, and it rains,
05:07wipe off, your skin's, um...
05:10wet-proof.
05:12I mean, yeah, that did deserve that golf clap.
05:17I believe you will wear shorts in all seasons, is that right?
05:20Is that the dead of winter there, Jamie?
05:22Yeah. You're wearing gloves.
05:26And I'm wearing short shorts.
05:28What do you want to be when you grow up?
05:30You're going to probably have to wear some trousers.
05:31What do you want to be? Football.
05:32OK.
05:34Yeah, this, yeah, OK, fair enough, yeah.
05:39Why won't you have the other boys to ask a size up
05:41in comparison to trousers?
05:43Now, Persia, what have you brought in as the most unusual item
05:46beginning with these letters?
05:48You get an hour with my pug, McLovin.
05:52Oh, OK.
05:57What's unusual about him? Many things.
06:00Number one, he poops when he barks.
06:05Number two, his back legs are very wobbly,
06:08so when he falls over, his legs are very wobbly.
06:12So, when he falls over, his legs go...
06:15..into the air, and my dad calls him Legs-Up-Linda.
06:22Kovu, is there an Aunty Linda in your life?
06:28We have apple trees in our garden,
06:30so in autumn, when they come out, he eats them.
06:33Then he makes his own applesauce by pulling out those apples,
06:37then he eats the applesauce and makes better applesauce.
06:42I'm just going to make it clear, if you do win the hour,
06:44we can take him home before the hour,
06:47because I doubt that you're going to want to spend the full hour.
06:50What a prize!
06:51APPLAUSE
06:53Wonderful. Thank you so much for your prize task.
06:56Janaya, how are you doing? I'm doing good, thanks.
06:59What have you brought in for your prize task tonight?
07:01So, I have brought in, not a toothbrush, a teethbrush.
07:06Here it is.
07:07AUDIENCE GROANS
07:09Oh, my goodness!
07:12Yeah, well, we want to know whose teeth they are
07:14and where the rest of them is.
07:16They're fake teeth.
07:18Yeah, fake teeth. Definitely. Fake teeth.
07:21I think one of them has a filling.
07:24They're very accurate fake teeth, yeah.
07:28She's moved into legal defence mode.
07:32With this teethbrush, it would be very useful,
07:35because there's always this one friend, that one family member,
07:38that you don't really like.
07:39So, like, when they come to stay,
07:42just put this toothbrush in the guest bathroom,
07:45then when they go to the bathroom, just let the chaos unfold.
07:48LAUGHTER
07:49OK, wow.
07:51OK, you know, all very good.
07:52It's all final material prize tasks.
07:55Got to say, though, look, trousers, one point.
07:58LAUGHTER
08:00Persia, I'm going to say two points,
08:02because you almost negotiated the time down there with McLovin.
08:06It is fun, and it's going to be great merch,
08:08but three points to Gwen.
08:10And we don't have Mike, but it's a rubber chicken with no head,
08:13and I find that rather unusual.
08:15So, four points to Anita, but, um, yeah,
08:17that is the weirdest thing I've ever seen in my life.
08:20So, it's got to be the full five points to Shania!
08:23APPLAUSE
08:24Oh, my goodness!
08:27OK.
08:28It is time now to unfurl that first task
08:31and run it up the task pole, so take it away, Mike.
08:34What childhood memories are conjured up for you by the word camping?
08:37For me, it conjures up frostbitten toes
08:39and a search and rescue mission in the Cairngorms,
08:41i.e. character-building stuff.
08:44So, in this next task, we're making camping memories,
08:46Junior Taskmaster style.
08:48MUSIC PLAYS
09:01Hello, Gwen. Hello.
09:03How are you? Cold.
09:04Hi. Hello, Anita.
09:07Where did you get your hat?
09:08My mum made it.
09:10Very fine work. With crochet.
09:12Hello, Persia. Hello.
09:14Hello, Jamie. Hello, Mike.
09:16Hello, Shania. What... What's this?
09:20It's a task, innit?
09:22Can I open it? Yes, please.
09:26Pitch your tent as fast as possible.
09:30Your tent must be properly pegged down and zipped up.
09:33Your time starts now.
09:36Oh, God. I don't know how to pitch a tent.
09:39Uh-oh.
09:40Um...
09:41APPLAUSE
09:43I just don't know how to pitch tents.
09:45I think I'll do it well.
09:47You'll love to see it. He's a man of his words.
09:49One of the coldest days, it seems.
09:51And, Jamie, you're still in shorts.
09:53Shorts and a puffer jacket.
09:54You are a walking contradiction, my friend.
09:56I do want to shout out Anita's mum, obviously, a crocheter.
10:00Has she made you anything else?
10:01Scarf and gloves to match that.
10:03She's making my teddy bunny a scarf at the moment.
10:07And she's made me a blanket, a blanket for her bed
10:10and multiple other things.
10:12OK. Don't need a show-off.
10:15Yeah, my mum does stuff as well, so...
10:18Right, um...
10:19No, that's very good. I love that hair.
10:21All right, I'm ready to watch the first of our happy campers.
10:24OK, let's see how they got on.
10:26I hope there are instructions.
10:29That would be helpful.
10:31Have you ever pitched a tent before?
10:33Nope, I have no idea how to do it.
10:35Ever pitched a tent before?
10:37No. Been camping before?
10:39Uh, yeah.
10:40Who pitched the tent?
10:41My fellow scouts.
10:43You're a scout but you claim you've never pitched a tent before?
10:45Yeah.
10:46What would Baden-Powell have to say about that, I wonder?
10:49I hope he's not watching this.
10:50I don't think he's watching.
10:53Oh!
10:55Ah!
10:57Well, that's fun.
10:59So, I think these are the pegs.
11:01OK.
11:03These go into the ground.
11:05How long does it take the average person to pitch a tent?
11:07That's a very good question.
11:09Do you know the answer?
11:10Yeah.
11:11What is it?
11:13I'm not going to tell you. Oh.
11:18OK, mallet. Mallet.
11:21All right, we'll have another here.
11:22Yep.
11:24It's a smasher, really.
11:26Whee!
11:29So, zip it up.
11:31There.
11:32OK.
11:33Are you done? Yep, done.
11:34Finished.
11:37I'd say I'm done.
11:42Stop the clock!
11:44Thanks, Anita.
11:46Can I come out now?
11:47Not just yet.
11:48OK, I'll go to sleep.
11:50Have you been camping before, Anita?
11:52No.
11:53How's it going?
11:54It's a great experience.
11:58You're my pleasure.
12:00Oh.
12:01Oh, this is alarming.
12:02Another task.
12:05Hello.
12:07We've got a delivery.
12:08Another one?
12:10Fill your tent with biodegradable balloons.
12:13You have ten minutes to fill your tent.
12:15Minus the time it took you to pitch your tent.
12:18Most biodegradable balloons in your tent wins.
12:21Your time starts when Mike blows his whistle.
12:25But... where are the balloons?
12:28What?
12:30Where are the balloons and bees?
12:33I mean, come on, guys, this isn't your first rodeo.
12:36You know there's always a twist when it comes to junior taskmaster.
12:40Now, Gwen, you are in the Scouts, is that correct?
12:43Yeah. That's fantastic.
12:44You mentioned that you hadn't put a tent up,
12:46but your fellow Scouts had put your tent up.
12:49Yeah, I'm one of those slackers who just, like,
12:51I watch the people, like, put up the tent,
12:54and I'm like, great job, team!
12:55Well done!
12:57I mean, you will go so far in life.
13:00With that attitude, yeah.
13:01Do you think he'll be a Boy Scout?
13:03Do they wear ties?
13:05They actually do, yeah.
13:06That's the one thing he's got going for him, really.
13:08I think of myself as a Man Scout.
13:12All right. As we all know, the true meaning of any television show
13:15is to fill time between the adverts.
13:17So, without further ado, here's the main event,
13:19a commercial break!
13:31Welcome back to the grand final of Junior Taskmaster.
13:34And remember, if you want to vote for your favourite contestant tonight,
13:37text COST50P and count for absolutely nothing,
13:40because that's not how the show works.
13:42Now, what is up next, Mike?
13:43It is time for Jamie, Gwen and Anita.
13:48OK, where are the balloons?
13:50That is THE question.
13:53Can we go to the shed? We can.
13:55Thank you. Do you have any idea where they could be, Mike?
13:57Oh, yeah.
13:59Can you tell me?
14:00I don't think so.
14:02Er...
14:04Hmm. Where else could they be?
14:07Am I allowed to look in there?
14:12It's not in there. No.
14:14Ah! Ah!
14:15Oh!
14:16Oh, my gosh. It is full of balloons.
14:19I found them!
14:21You've got four minutes and 39 seconds left.
14:24Hi-ya! Hi-ya!
14:26HE GROANS
14:28What's the strategy here?
14:30Get the balloons in there. Yeah.
14:34Are you finding any of your scout skills are currently transferable?
14:37No, not really. What do they teach you?
14:39You know, they usually teach us how to put beans on a campfire.
14:43Right.
14:44HE GROANS
14:45HE GROANS
14:47I am coming.
14:48I can put more balloons in it faster.
14:50Mike? Yeah?
14:51Can we go to the shed again? Yeah.
14:56That was fun.
14:57Mike? Yeah?
14:59Can you get me some more balloons?
15:00From out of the caravan?
15:02Yes, please.
15:04Can you fill this bucket up, please, with balloons?
15:06OK.
15:07Why don't you help me put them in the tent?
15:09I can't help you put them in the tent.
15:10Yeah, cos you're boring.
15:12I beg your pardon?
15:13HE SCREAMS
15:1521 seconds. 21 seconds?
15:21HE WHISTLES
15:24Oh, they're falling out.
15:26I feel like it went the best it could go.
15:29Thank you, Anita.
15:30You're welcome.
15:33Bye.
15:38Wow.
15:39It seems like you guys all had fun there.
15:41Did you have a bit of fun? Yeah.
15:42Props to Jamie, because you thought of taking the tent
15:45over to the caravan.
15:47What made you think of that?
15:48It's easy to get them in.
15:50Hang on. Yeah?
15:51So, he moved the tent, right?
15:52And, like, to make a tent, you have to hammer them down.
15:54So, if he didn't hammer them down, that means he didn't do it properly.
15:57Yeah, he didn't do it properly. No.
15:58Interesting.
15:59That was part one.
16:01Ah. Yeah. Part one was to pitch the tent.
16:03Did he pitch the tent properly in the first place?
16:06There's no proper way of pitching a tent.
16:09You can do it however you like.
16:11There, er...
16:13There absolutely is.
16:17All right, well, look, I think it's time for some more balloon action.
16:20Who's up next? It is Persia and Shania.
16:23WHISTLE
16:24OK.
16:25Where are the balloons?!
16:27Ah!
16:29WHISTLE
16:30OK. Shed.
16:32Are they in the caravan?
16:35Yeah, they're here. No.
16:36Hmm. Where could they be, then?
16:40Hiding?
16:43Ah! Oh, there we go.
16:46Perfect.
16:47We need to look in every space possible.
16:50Right.
16:51So, the bin?
16:53Yeah.
16:54No, that's just bricks.
16:56LAUGHTER
16:59What's your plan?
17:01Put biodegradable balloons in the tent.
17:05The caravan?
17:06Hold on, first, the mailbox.
17:07Yeah, check the mailbox first.
17:09No mail. No.
17:10No.
17:12Oh, my God!
17:14BUZZER
17:17I already have an idea.
17:19Can you pop some balloons? What with?
17:20Anything. Your pen.
17:22My pen? I guess.
17:26Thank you!
17:28BUZZER
17:29You're welcome.
17:30What was your plan?
17:31You pop the balloons.
17:32I pop the balloons?
17:33Yeah.
17:34LAUGHTER
17:37Shall I pop some of these?
17:38Yeah, if you want.
17:39LAUGHTER
17:44LAUGHTER
17:45Do I just keep going?
17:46You just keep on popping, Mike.
17:48What happens if I pop myself?
17:49Er...
17:50Oh, well, don't do that, Mike.
17:52LAUGHTER
17:56You can gather up some of the, um, balloon carcasses.
17:59Balloon carcasses, did you say?
18:01Yeah. Quite a chilling idea.
18:0425 seconds left.
18:05OK!
18:07Let's give one full balloon.
18:10OK.
18:12Ha!
18:14WHISTLE
18:16Thank you, Persia.
18:18Er, bye, balloons.
18:21Sorry I popped you.
18:22LAUGHTER
18:23APPLAUSE
18:28Wow, what a fearless balloon poppy.
18:31Sinead, you had a lot of fun doing that.
18:33Well, I really like balloons, so it was, like, a dream.
18:36But I don't think I've dreamed of putting balloons in a tent,
18:38but I have dreamed of lying in a bed of balloons.
18:42LAUGHTER
18:43You actually drifted away there for a second.
18:46Persia, tell me about balloon carcasses.
18:49I mean, there's a difference between...
18:52..a balloon and a popped balloon.
18:56Ooh! Yeah, if it's not a balloon still...
18:59A balloon's a popped balloon.
19:01No, no, there's still a balloon...
19:03Hoisted by your own fatality there, Persia.
19:06When you buy balloons at the store, they come unblown.
19:08They still classify, like, eight-coloured,
19:11multi-coloured, wow, balloons.
19:13LAUGHTER
19:14They don't... They don't classify.
19:16That's true.
19:17That is true.
19:18Whenever you buy sarcastic balloons, they always...
19:21LAUGHTER
19:23So, I will accept all of those balloons as balloons,
19:26but I would love to know who got the most balloons
19:28in their tents, Michael.
19:30Anita got 42 balloons in her tent.
19:33Gwen, very close to Anita, with 43.
19:36We leap up to 120 balloons,
19:39which was Jamie with his tent-dragging technique.
19:42The poppers, however, streaks ahead.
19:43Persia managed 169 balloons in her tent.
19:47Shania, 171.
19:50Wow!
19:52Well, well, well.
19:53That is pretty straightforward points there.
19:55That is one point to Anita, two points to Gwen.
19:57I'd say three points for Jamie, four points for Persia,
20:00but five points to Shania.
20:01Well done. Fantastic.
20:02APPLAUSE
20:06Okey-dokey, shall we see how that all affects the scoreboard?
20:08It is very tight indeed.
20:10Got Jamie on four, Gwen and Anita on five, Persia on six,
20:12and just nipping up ahead is Shania on ten.
20:15Whoa! Wow!
20:17Pretty close.
20:18Very close.
20:21OK, my main man, Mike, what's up next?
20:23When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
20:25When life gives you marble, make marmalade.
20:28But sometimes life gives you neither,
20:29and instead gives you a potentially complicated medley-type task,
20:32in which case my advice would be head down and crack on with it.
20:34You're in the final, for goodness' sake.
20:36LAUGHTER
20:42MUSIC
20:51Hello. Hello, Jamie.
20:54Hi.
20:57Hello, Mike.
20:59Hello.
21:01Hi, Mike. Hi, Anita.
21:03How have you prepared for this final?
21:05Eating food.
21:06What's the food of a winner?
21:08Carbonara.
21:10Is it?
21:11Breakfast is probably granola and cherry yoghurt.
21:14OK.
21:15Lunch is sweet chilli wrap, soup, something like that.
21:20OK.
21:21And then, in the evening, your carbonara.
21:23Carbonara.
21:28OK.
21:30Place a number next to each word,
21:33then open the next task.
21:36I'm just going to read this, see if I can make it make sense in it.
21:40OK.
21:44I don't think I can.
21:46I'm just thinking, just lob the numbers next to the...
21:50..words, because... Just lob them.
21:52Olive seven, country seven, sneeze seven, bin seven.
21:57I haven't got a time limit on this, do I?
22:00I mean, it'll get dark eventually.
22:02OK.
22:05Where's the next task?
22:07It's right here. OK, thank you.
22:11Do each thing the number of times you have chosen.
22:15These are the things.
22:16Name a country.
22:18Eat an olive.
22:19Thank God.
22:21Eat an olive!
22:22Yay!
22:23Get completely in and out of a sleeping bag.
22:26Do a star jump.
22:27Throw a paper ball into the bin.
22:29Pretend to sneeze.
22:31Fastest to complete all six things wins.
22:35You have a maximum of 15 minutes.
22:36Your time starts now.
22:39I am so thankful I didn't put in a huge olive.
22:4518 olives, you're joking.
22:56Oh, my gosh.
22:57Jamie, you went full Gordon Ramsay at the end there.
23:0018 olives, you are joking, mate.
23:02Oh, my goodness.
23:03I mean, by the look of your face,
23:05I think it means something not good for you.
23:07Not good at all.
23:08Not good at all.
23:09I was actually going to ask you, Gwen.
23:12Is choosing things quite haphazardly your personality?
23:14Yeah, yeah.
23:16But that's not very Scout energy, is it?
23:18I feel like I'd be concerned about going on a Scout trip
23:20with a Scout that just totally feels vibes.
23:22Just like, yeah, there might be a snake, whatever.
23:24Yes, there might be a snake,
23:25but my team-mates are just going to scare it off of me
23:27while I go, well done.
23:31I am ready, honestly, to see a bit more about this task,
23:34so please, Mike.
23:35OK, here we go.
23:37We've got Sinead, Jamie and Anita.
23:39Your time starts now.
23:41Right, let's sneeze.
23:43ACHOO!
23:45ACHOO!
23:47ACHOO!
23:48ACHOO!
23:501, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, done.
23:54ACHOO!
23:55ACHOO!
23:56ACHOO!
23:57I think that might have been a real one.
23:59ACHOO!
24:01ACHOO!
24:03I'm done.
24:04Sneeze.
24:08Four star jumps.
24:09Are you ready for this? I'm ready.
24:12ACHOO!
24:13OK. Thank you.
24:14Right, name seven countries.
24:16England, Australia, Wales... India, China, Japan.
24:19Scotland. Hong Kong.
24:20ACHOO!
24:21Scotland's a country, right?
24:23Yeah.
24:24Er, Los Angeles.
24:25ACHOO!
24:26Netherlands.
24:28Peru.
24:29ACHOO!
24:30One more.
24:31Iceland.
24:32ACHOO!
24:33Ooh!
24:34Can you hold that? This is nice.
24:37ACHOO!
24:38WHAAAT?!
24:43WHAAAT?!
24:44You're gonna celebrate that much every single time you get one in the bin?
24:47WHAAAT?!
24:51ACHOO!
24:53Olives next, is it?
24:54Yes, it's olives next.
24:57They smell so bad.
25:00I love olives, actually.
25:01I don't like them.
25:03No.
25:05Mm.
25:06Mm.
25:07Everything OK?
25:09Horrible.
25:10Oh!
25:15I can't do that.
25:17OK, um...
25:19Get completely in and out of the sleeping bag.
25:22Ooh, looks cosy.
25:24Hello! Hello.
25:26Oh, no!
25:29Came in the sleeping bag,
25:31had a nap, I'm out of the sleeping bag.
25:35And now the last thing is throw a paper ball into the bin.
25:40In.
25:42Out.
25:44Can I have some olives, please, whilst I'm doing this?
25:47So, I'm just going to fix the zip on my own, am I? Mm-hm.
25:50While you snaffle olives.
25:52Bye.
25:54WHISTLE
26:00WHISTLE
26:01I'm not happy. Why?
26:04Because sleeping bags are evil!
26:10Yay! Second try.
26:12And I'm done.
26:14Fine.
26:16Bye-bye.
26:22Oh, my gosh.
26:24Shania.
26:26Um, I'm an idiot.
26:28Oh, no! Einstein is a cruel, cruel mistress, Shania.
26:33I've only got to eat 11 olives.
26:35Yeah, you absolutely... I know, it's your lucky.
26:37Horrible! Horrible!
26:39Yeah, you had a bad time with that, Jamie.
26:41I got some water, cos I was like,
26:43oh, this'll be easier, I'll just go...
26:47Don't go there mentally, all right, Jamie?
26:49Come back to us, back to us, yeah?
26:51It kills me.
26:53Genuinely, Anita, why are sleeping bags evil?
26:55That ship broke,
26:57like, one zillion times.
26:59Oh, no!
27:02You had to put your sleeping bag back
27:04into the thing that you had.
27:06Get the bag...
27:08I got my fellow scouts to do it for me!
27:10Oh, come on, Gwen, no!
27:12I can't believe you!
27:16Right, there's only one thing for it.
27:18Adverts. See you soon.
27:20APPLAUSE
27:30Welcome back to the grand final
27:32of Junior Taskmaster.
27:34Now, it's actually come to my attention
27:36during the break that all of our finalists
27:38have tested positive for task-enhancing steroids.
27:40LAUGHTER
27:42But, since that is not against the rules,
27:44we can crack on. Here we go.
27:46Time for a look at the final part of the task.
27:49Let's get the olive out of the way.
27:51Right.
27:53Oh, my God.
27:55OK.
27:57Oh, my God.
27:59How many stars?
28:01Nine.
28:03One.
28:05Two.
28:07Three.
28:09Four.
28:11Seven.
28:13Eight.
28:15Nine.
28:17Oh, the olive. Four.
28:19Five. Six.
28:21Seven.
28:23Oh!
28:25I hate the olive.
28:27Are you left-handed?
28:29No.
28:31You make a good point.
28:33Yay!
28:35HE COUGHS
28:37Oh, my God, that olive.
28:39HE COUGHS
28:41Bless me.
28:43Bless you.
28:46Oh, I'm not good with sleeping bags.
28:48Why is the sleeping bag wet?
28:50I wouldn't pull on that thread if I was you.
28:52It might not be shop-fresh.
28:54Three.
28:56Four. Five. Six.
28:58Seven. Eight.
29:00Nine. You're having some trouble.
29:02Halfway!
29:04How many was that?
29:06Ooh. What do you think?
29:08I think this was the tenth one.
29:10OK.
29:12Eleven.
29:15Eleven.
29:17AUDIENCE GROANS
29:19Eighteen.
29:21Name 18 countries.
29:23Barbados.
29:25Name one country.
29:27Wales! OK.
29:29Nebraska.
29:31No, that's not a country.
29:33Alaska.
29:35California.
29:37Oh, no.
29:39I don't like this.
29:41I've forgotten all of the countries.
29:43Would it help if you thought about population density tables?
29:45I don't even know what that is.
29:47No.
29:51If that counts, then that's not honest, though.
29:55You don't have to eat out of a bin, I don't think.
29:57I wouldn't...
29:59I'm not enjoying this.
30:01Your eyes are watering.
30:03This is the worst task I've ever done.
30:07Oh. Iran. Syria.
30:09Spain. Germany. Egypt.
30:12Scotland. Wales.
30:14England? No. Yeah.
30:18Can I have a glass of water, please?
30:20You're not allowed to say how many I have left.
30:22Oh, I'm allowed? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
30:24But you're just so annoying. I'm not going to.
30:26This is impossible.
30:28WHISTLE BLOWS
30:30Goodbye. Thank you, Persia.
30:32So would you say you've acquired the taste now?
30:34Olive fan?
30:36No.
30:38No, bye.
30:40APPLAUSE
30:46You ate it out of the bin.
30:48Anything for the task.
30:50Do you often eat food out of the bin?
30:52No, she lets her scouts do it.
30:56I've got to say, at Persia,
30:58I would have done the exact same thing
31:00with that country element of the task.
31:02I just want to mention,
31:04the moment before I went on that,
31:06I was talking about how I wanted to go to Japan.
31:09Japan is a country, apparently.
31:13Gwen, I mean,
31:15you were straight to Wales.
31:17What's the best thing about Wales?
31:19The sheep.
31:21But...
31:23New Zealand is an exact
31:25copy of Wales.
31:27What are you trying to say to me?
31:29It's OK.
31:31It's just the famous penguins of Swansea
31:33is what she's talking about.
31:36I reckon it's time for some points for this task.
31:38Yes.
31:40Gwen was the only one to complete all six tasks
31:42and managed that in 7 minutes 44.
31:44Anita completed five
31:46in 12 minutes 59.
31:48Shania completed four
31:50in an incredibly rapid three minutes 34.
31:52Possibly that quick because she
31:54didn't do a couple of them.
31:56Persia also got four
31:58but it took the full 15 minutes.
32:00Jamie managed five,
32:02much like Anita, and did it in 7.41
32:04but there was the olive refusal issue.
32:06OK.
32:08One point to Persia.
32:10Two points to Shania.
32:12Three points for Jamie.
32:14Four points to Anita.
32:16The full five points go to Gwen.
32:18Well done.
32:20Very well done, all of you.
32:22OK, Mikey Mouse,
32:24what is our penultimate task of the night?
32:26This one is straight out of
32:28the MI5 recruitment playbook, probably.
32:34MUSIC PLAYS
32:44Hi, Mike.
32:46Hello, Anita.
32:48Hello. Hi.
32:50Hi.
32:52Ey up, Mike. Ey up.
32:54How do?
32:56I don't speak that language, I'm sorry, what?
32:58Plans for the weekend?
33:00Well, I'm playing football on Saturday again.
33:02Perfect weekend for Jamie.
33:04Good win at football? Mm-hm.
33:06And then just playing out with my mates?
33:08Yeah.
33:10What's Mike's perfect weekend?
33:12Silence.
33:14Mm.
33:16Yes, please.
33:22Leave this room
33:24in exactly one minute from now.
33:26Sit in the lab for three minutes.
33:28Then when the alarm goes off, re-enter the room.
33:32OK.
33:34One, two, three.
33:36So, do I have a clock
33:38so I know when the one minute is?
33:40No.
33:42Seven elephant,
33:44eight elephant, nine elephant.
33:4612, 13,
33:4814.
33:52One Mississippi,
33:54two Mississippi,
33:56three Mississippi.
33:58Are you timing it?
34:00Are you timing it?
34:04Bye-bye.
34:06Are you going now?
34:08See you later.
34:1436 elephant,
34:1637 elephant.
34:1857, 58, 59, 60.
34:20Goodbye.
34:22That was the end of your minute.
34:24Oh, I didn't have to come.
34:26Bye.
34:2837 elephants in a minute,
34:30as it turns out.
34:3420 Mississippi,
34:3621 Mississippi.
34:38Thank you, Anita.
34:42Wow.
34:44Lots of different versions
34:46of a minute there.
34:48Yeah.
34:5037 elephants, 21 Mississippis.
34:52Mississippi have failed me.
34:54Shanae,
34:56you were literally going
34:5850, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55.
35:00I was the most accurate,
35:02so you can't say that, Rowan.
35:06Well, that's the first time
35:08that's happened on the show.
35:10Persia,
35:12you're a fan of pigeons.
35:14I'm surprised you didn't decide
35:16to count in pigeons.
35:18I've been having to switch
35:20between methods.
35:22Now I'm trying pigeons,
35:24I don't know how to count my minutes.
35:28I'm very excited for the next part.
35:30Sock it to me.
35:32Here you go. Socked.
35:44I'm both.
35:46Tick, tock.
35:48Tick, tock.
35:50I bet this isn't going to be
35:52the end of this task.
35:54I'd be too easy.
36:00Four, three,
36:02two, one.
36:06Bye-bye.
36:12Hello.
36:14Hello.
36:26Oh, my God.
36:30Hello, Gwen.
36:32Hi, Mike. Hi, Anita.
36:34Is it disco time?
36:36It's always disco time, Anita.
36:38Right, OK.
36:40So what has changed?
36:44I don't know.
36:54Most correct answers wins.
36:56Every incorrect answer
36:58will lose you two correct answers.
37:00You have three minutes.
37:02Your time starts now.
37:04APPLAUSE
37:06Oh, wow.
37:08You've got lots of them wrong.
37:10Tricky, tricky start.
37:12I can't address the absolute inability
37:14of anyone to stand in the lab
37:16for three minutes without getting bored.
37:18Anita, you were straight into meditation
37:20and then immediately, I'm bored. I'm bored.
37:22I also, I loved how everyone
37:24walked back into the room.
37:26Finding a man dressed as a crow on the sofa
37:28was kind of disturbing.
37:30You thought it was disco time, Anita.
37:32I've been through... Yeah.
37:34Do we still do discos at school and stuff?
37:36Yeah, we do have more discos.
37:38Really? Are they fun? They're pretty terrible.
37:40Because, like, the year sixes,
37:42we have to share our discos with the year fives
37:44and they are a bunch of...
37:46Oh, not you!
37:48LAUGHTER
37:50Not you!
37:52Just the year fives
37:54in my school.
37:56I'm missing my disco to be here.
37:58But if I'm honest, I'd rather be here
38:00than a disco for multiple reasons.
38:02The music's way too loud. Yeah.
38:04People have way too many sugar rushes.
38:06LAUGHTER
38:08It's actually so annoying
38:10because everyone's like,
38:12you should have a boyfriend.
38:14And I'm like, I don't want a boyfriend!
38:16Yeah, you are...
38:18Come on!
38:20APPLAUSE
38:22I think it's time for a break.
38:24And you know what?
38:26Just have fun with this one, yeah?
38:28Make it your own. It's the end of term.
38:30I'm clocking off. See you soon. Bye.
38:32APPLAUSE
38:34MUSIC
38:36APPLAUSE
38:42Welcome back.
38:44It is the final part in the final show
38:46and not long until the final task.
38:48What's up next, Mike Littlepony?
38:50I'll show you. Here we go.
38:52Hmm.
38:54All right.
38:56One. A bird sitting in this room.
38:58Right. There's a disco ball
39:00which is actually shining.
39:02An aubergine. A teeny rubber duck.
39:04There's a horse in that plant.
39:06The table has gone and it's turned teeny.
39:08And the chair's gone teeny, too.
39:10Oh, a little table.
39:14You are wearing a duck tie.
39:16Is that a question?
39:18No. It's a statement.
39:20You and your tie.
39:22Your sassel and your lasso.
39:24Moustaches. Rose has got a moustache.
39:26Oh, and the pictures you've changed!
39:28I'm on it!
39:30I don't know if the eggplant was there.
39:32Oh, this is tricky.
39:34No, tomato soup wasn't there.
39:36I can read. Don't you worry.
39:38There wasn't a cat there,
39:40otherwise I probably would have stroked it.
39:42It's the cat.
39:44The cat wasn't there.
39:46Oh, did I mention the pineapple?
39:48That light wasn't on.
39:50How long have I got?
39:52You've got one minute and 11 seconds left.
39:54There wasn't a disco ball.
39:56The wooden piñata kind of horsey.
39:58These little guys weren't here.
40:00These little guys weren't here.
40:02How long do I have left?
40:04You've got...
40:06..no seconds left. OK.
40:08Thank you, Jamie. I think I did well there.
40:10Do you? Yeah.
40:12That's still creepy.
40:14LAUGHTER
40:16APPLAUSE
40:20So it turns out, you know,
40:22their first minute in that room was to, you know,
40:24memorise their surroundings,
40:26although we didn't get round to telling them that bit.
40:28I mean, it's some rather offensive statements
40:30just thrown around.
40:32Sinead just screaming,
40:34Rose has got a moustache!
40:36You're not sitting close enough to see that, are you?
40:38You would never wear a duck tie!
40:40I know, that's very strange.
40:42You looked really good in it,
40:44but I prefer you with your knitted tie.
40:48They're learning now. They're absolutely learning.
40:50All righty, I want to see how good their memories are.
40:52Mike, please, hit me with some stats.
40:54Very good. They all did very well, got most things.
40:56They all missed the lampshade, which changed colour.
40:58They all missed a book, which was entitled,
41:00Hey, Kid, This Book Wasn't Here Before.
41:02LAUGHTER
41:04Quick recap, for each wrong guess, we're taking two off their total.
41:06So, Persia, for example, got ten correct.
41:08She got three incorrect guesses,
41:10so that means four is her score on that.
41:12Similarly, Sinead ends up with seven.
41:14Jamie, eight.
41:16Gwen got ten guesses and no wrong,
41:18so stays on ten.
41:20And Anita, 11.
41:22OK, so that means it would be one point to Persia,
41:24two points to Sinead,
41:26three points for Jamie,
41:28four for Gwen,
41:30and five points to Anita.
41:32CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:34There we go. Well done.
41:36Right, you teeny little tights,
41:38make your way over to the stage
41:40for the final task of the show.
41:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:50Mike, who is going to be the final person
41:52to read out the final task
41:54on the final of Junior Taskmaster?
41:56It's going to be Jamie, please.
42:00Get your shoe furthest down the knapper.
42:02For each round,
42:04you may choose one shoe to throw
42:06and you may only throw
42:08each shoe once.
42:10You must stand on the spot to throw your shoe.
42:12The contestant whose shoe
42:14is least far down the knapper
42:16will be eliminated at the end of each round.
42:18If anyone's shoe
42:20falls off the knapper
42:22or does not pass the green line,
42:24they're disqualified.
42:26Thank you, Jamie. It's very much a last man standing
42:28kind of deal.
42:30Are the shoes in there or do we need to use our own shoes?
42:32The shoes are provided.
42:34The shoes are in your box.
42:36And if you are eliminated, my dear contestants,
42:38you'll be asked to sit on your box.
42:40It would be fun to sit on the box.
42:42Great.
42:44Well, that could be coming your way.
42:46LAUGHTER
42:48Have a think about what shoe you're going to choose first.
42:50Oh, wow.
42:52Three, two, one.
42:54Show your shoes, please.
42:56LAUGHTER
42:58So, Anita, you are up first.
43:00APPLAUSE
43:04Oh!
43:06Next up is Gwen, please.
43:08Oh!
43:10APPLAUSE
43:14APPLAUSE
43:16Frasier.
43:18Frasier, thank you.
43:20Good luck. Thank you.
43:22Next up is Shania.
43:24Oh!
43:26I'm afraid I'm going to say you are eliminated.
43:28Take a seat. So well done, Anita.
43:30OK, round three. Open your boxes.
43:32Show your shoes to the world, please.
43:34In your own time.
43:38Oh!
43:40APPLAUSE
43:42Oh!
43:44Shania, you're up.
43:46Shoe.
43:48Oh!
43:50Shoe. Gwen, you are eliminated.
43:52Shoe selection, please.
43:54Triple flipper.
43:56It's never been seen before.
43:58Oh!
44:00APPLAUSE
44:04Oh!
44:08Oh!
44:10Shania is eliminated.
44:12Down to the last two.
44:16Double boots. OK, Persia.
44:20Oh!
44:24Straight off the nappet, but, of course,
44:26we do need Jamie's go as well.
44:30It's Jamie.
44:32Congratulations, one and all.
44:34And that means, of course, that in this studio task,
44:36we have one point to Anita,
44:38two to Gwen, we have three to Shania,
44:40four to Persia,
44:42and five to Jamie. Well done, Jamie.
44:44APPLAUSE
44:46Right, let's get ready for the final scores of the night
44:48and to declare our junior taskmaster champion.
44:52APPLAUSE
44:58So, my friends, it all comes down to this, OK?
45:00It's the final scores.
45:02Now, I want you all to remember
45:04that you have all done so amazingly well.
45:06I could take a hammer and smash that golden trophy
45:08into five bits and give you all the peace I would,
45:10but I'm not allowed around hammers any more.
45:12So, please, Mike, take it away.
45:14OK. The final scores on the final of junior taskmaster.
45:18The nation holds its breath and clenches all its available cheeks.
45:22Here we go.
45:24First of all, a round of applause with 12 points
45:26has done spectacularly through the series.
45:28It's Persia.
45:30APPLAUSE
45:32In joint third place with 15 points,
45:35we have Anita and Jamie.
45:37APPLAUSE
45:41Second place with 16 points goes to...
45:44Gwen.
45:46APPLAUSE
45:48And with 17 points...
45:50That can only mean that tonight's winner
45:52and our series champion is the Outstanding,
45:55Shania!
45:57APPLAUSE
45:59Yes, good boy, Outstanding, good boy!
46:01Well done. Well done, everybody.
46:05Oh, wow!
46:07Incredible.
46:09That's it for the episode and the series.
46:11I would like to thank all of our fantastic contestants
46:14and a massive thank you to the UK's child labour laws
46:16for being so flexible.
46:18But before we go, let's hear it again
46:20for all of our wonderful contestants over the entire series.
46:23And, of course, a huge congratulations
46:25to our junior taskmaster champion, Shania!
46:28CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:34CHEERING AND APPLAUSE