The Three Badasses Who Want Me Short Drama
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Sir, I found Angela Lockhart.
00:00:15Angela, still selling your hippie junk here?
00:00:18I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity.
00:00:23Now sign the divorce paper.
00:00:27Baby.
00:00:29I'll sign it.
00:00:31Here, don't look right at it.
00:00:36My lovely princess, I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from.
00:00:41I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:00:47You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:00:50I'm going. I need to pick up my bride.
00:00:53No!
00:00:55Prepare my warplane!
00:01:01What's the situation here?
00:01:03I want to marry you.
00:01:06Ellen Musk, the only woman on the Forbes 30 Under 30 list, arrives in Atlanta today.
00:01:11What a business tycoon is doing here in Georgia, a forgotten stage no one knows.
00:01:16Angela, my next-door neighbor.
00:01:19Still selling your hippie junk here?
00:01:21If your mother-in-law sees, she's going to throw a big fit again.
00:01:24Your mother-in-law was right about you.
00:01:26What's the point of watching the news all day about these moguls if you can't even apply it to your penniless self?
00:01:31And how do you know that this is none of my business?
00:01:35Alright, everybody get out!
00:01:38We got an important guest coming!
00:01:41You can't just sit and watch!
00:01:43I've got to go.
00:01:45I'm going.
00:01:47I'm going.
00:01:49I'm going.
00:01:51We got an important guest coming!
00:01:55You!
00:02:00You deaf? I said pack up and scram!
00:02:03I paid the staff here already, and if you want me to leave, then fine, but you have to compensate for today's losses.
00:02:10You want to say that again?
00:02:14You know who's visiting today?
00:02:16Ellen freakin' Musk! One of the richest people in the world!
00:02:20Ellen Musk?
00:02:21Of course a hick like you probably never heard of her. Just know that you can't afford to piss her off.
00:02:28Really? Ellen Musk is flying all the way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market.
00:02:34You don't think that she could be coming to see me?
00:02:37Coming to see you? Alright, you know what, I'll play your game. If she does this so much as give you a glance, I'll eat dirt.
00:02:51Deal.
00:03:00Ellen Musk, get to the flea market within ten minutes, or else, you're fired.
00:03:08Hmm.
00:03:24Prepare the limo. Ms. Lockhart requires us immediately.
00:03:29Ah, your ten minutes is almost up.
00:03:31Good. Hope you don't wet your pants.
00:03:34Five.
00:03:35Four.
00:03:38Three.
00:03:40Two.
00:03:42One.
00:03:45Ellen! Uh, I mean, Ms. Musk, uh, Ellen, uh, I mean, uh, I'm sorry that I...
00:03:52Ellen! Uh, I mean, Ms. Musk, uh, Ellen, uh, I mean, uh, I'm sorry that I, uh, sorry to frighten you.
00:04:01How's my boss pitch?
00:04:03Kickin' ass, girlfriend.
00:04:05So how do you, like...
00:04:08She's my boss.
00:04:10Eh, I prefer business partner over best friend.
00:04:14No way.
00:04:18Well?
00:04:22No. No! No, no, I'm sorry for offending your boss! No, I won't do it again!
00:04:30Alright, that's enough. We're not tyrants here.
00:04:39Sir, I found Angela Lockhart.
00:04:43Angela Lockhart
00:04:47You mean Angela Lockhart.
00:04:50My runaway bride.
00:04:53You made me lose one million dollars in just one game of poker.
00:04:58Who are you?
00:05:01Where is she?
00:05:03Atlanta. And you were right. It was secretly her propping up Ellen Musk.
00:05:07My clever bride. I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:05:13Max, prep the jet. I'm heading to Atlanta.
00:05:23Dr. Wilson, that McSterling's on the move. He's headed to Atlanta.
00:05:27Atlanta? The game is afoot. I'm going.
00:05:30Wait, Dr. Wilson, the Prince of Bhutan needs your medical attention.
00:05:33He can wait. I need to pick up my bride.
00:05:39Dr. Wilson!
00:05:43Gino Eisenhower reporting, sir!
00:05:46Douglas Sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta.
00:05:49Atlanta!
00:05:51Where is that?
00:05:53Whatever. Prepare my warplane.
00:05:55Don't sue going after my fiancée. This is war.
00:06:13I've secretly allowed your husband, Jared Cooper, to win the bid on the Maple Plaza project like you asked me to.
00:06:24Thank you so much, Ellen. This is going to be the best anniversary gift ever.
00:06:29That project is worth billions. He can finally take his company public.
00:06:33But Angela, my boss, I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity.
00:06:42Without your backing, no offense, but he's nothing without you.
00:06:48Well, three years ago...
00:06:50Three years ago...
00:07:11You saved me.
00:07:13He saved me and I fell in love with him instantly.
00:07:17I didn't want to reveal my true identity because I didn't want him to feel the pressure of being with a billionaire heiress.
00:07:24But now, with this contract, I feel like we'll be on more equal footing and then I can finally come out to the public.
00:07:31So that's why you have me secretly helping him.
00:07:34I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out.
00:07:36But why work at the flea market? Are you disguising yourself to test him?
00:07:42Well, these exotic spices are incredibly rare and cost a fortune to find.
00:07:47Plus, I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom.
00:07:51You seem happy being a housewife.
00:07:57Where the hell are you? Don't tell me you're on the phone.
00:08:01Where the hell are you? Don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again.
00:08:06Get home, stat. It's a big day today.
00:08:10That was...
00:08:12My mother-in-law, Carol.
00:08:14She judges me because she thinks I come from a lower class family.
00:08:18But she's going to be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am.
00:08:23You know, she even remembered our third year anniversary.
00:08:27Please spend more time with my son.
00:08:31Hi, I'm home.
00:08:33I have a big announcement I have to make.
00:08:36Finally, you're back. Now sign the divorce papers.
00:08:41Divorce papers?
00:08:44Is this some sort of misunderstanding, Mom?
00:08:47Oh, God. Don't worry, Mom.
00:08:51Is this some sort of misunderstanding, Mom?
00:08:54Oh, God. Don't call me Mom again. We're ending that relationship.
00:09:00Just look at you. Dirt all over.
00:09:03You're selling the title of Mrs. Cooper.
00:09:05You don't deserve my son. You're way below his league.
00:09:09I'm below his league?
00:09:11That's right. You are.
00:09:13Jared is signing a hundred billion dollar contract tomorrow with the Ellen Musk.
00:09:19And then his company's going public.
00:09:22That's how much he's accomplished in three years.
00:09:25But you? You're still just a stinky hippie peddler.
00:09:30Jared's like the king in the clouds.
00:09:33And you?
00:09:35You will always just be a pawn.
00:09:38Like dirt on our shoes.
00:09:41Dirt on our shoes.
00:09:44Dirt on your shoes?
00:09:46But Ellen Musk works for me.
00:09:49You're delusional. You will never upgrade to a queen.
00:09:54How dare you compare yourself to the real deal here.
00:09:59Resorting to lies. Definitely not good enough for Jared.
00:10:03And who are you to come into my house and meddle with my family matters?
00:10:11You're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife.
00:10:16Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee.
00:10:19Not a lowlife dirtbag.
00:10:21Enough!
00:10:23Jared, I knew you wouldn't divorce me.
00:10:27But I am.
00:10:29Don't fight it, Angela.
00:10:32Here's 500K.
00:10:34You'll never make this much as a hippie peddler selling spices.
00:10:38Now sign the papers, take your check, and leave.
00:10:41Don't stress yourself further.
00:10:44I've done so much for you these past three years.
00:10:49Did that not mean anything to you?
00:10:52Didn't expect you to be so greedy.
00:10:55Fine. Here's another 200,000.
00:10:59500,000 is too much for her already.
00:11:02She's done nothing.
00:11:04Hasn't even contributed a grandchild.
00:11:07She just sells cheap grass all day.
00:11:09Is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:11:13I took care of both of you these past three years.
00:11:17You think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something?
00:11:22And she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench?
00:11:26A hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO?
00:11:30What a joke.
00:11:32If you actually love my son, you'll sign the damn divorce papers already.
00:11:37And leave!
00:11:40You really think that Jared would have gotten that Maple Plaza bid without me?
00:11:45Let alone taking the company public?
00:11:48I did everything for you, Jared.
00:11:51Now you take credit for my son's success?
00:11:58It's all my work!
00:12:02Baby, we're going to be late for the auction if we keep letting this psycho stall us.
00:12:10You did say you would win me Princess Diana's tiara, didn't you?
00:12:15So, she's the reason for the divorce.
00:12:19She's worth more than you, Angela.
00:12:23Fine. I'll sign it.
00:12:27But don't regret it.
00:12:30Regret?
00:12:32Do you know who I am?
00:12:34Yeah, a cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed?
00:12:37I'm Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
00:12:41Jared winning the bid on Maple Plaza was because of my dad.
00:12:47Because he's business partners with Elon Musk.
00:12:50It's part of the power that I have as an elite.
00:12:55You can't do shit because you're poor.
00:12:58Social stratum matters.
00:13:01Yeah, social stratum does matter.
00:13:03And the Coopers are beneath me.
00:13:07And you really think Elon Musk would come to Atlanta if it weren't for me?
00:13:12Ha! You're delusional.
00:13:15Now sign the papers and scram!
00:13:21You owe me.
00:13:23You dirty bitch. You sicken me.
00:13:26You hit me.
00:13:30Now sign the papers, take a track, and get the fuck out!
00:13:55I don't need your penny money.
00:13:59We're finished.
00:14:01You don't want the money? That's your loss.
00:14:04Your check is just pennies to me.
00:14:07But I would like my ring back.
00:14:18Have fun on your economy flight while I catch a ride on my private helicopter out of here.
00:14:26And I'm way out of your league.
00:14:36Isn't that the Winston blue diamond ring?
00:14:40It's worth tens of millions of dollars.
00:14:44Oh, it's probably just cheap glass.
00:14:47Something she found at the flea market.
00:14:50You're right. She could never afford anything so expensive.
00:14:54Congrats, Jared Boo Boo, on getting rid of that dirt bag.
00:14:59Oh! My dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon at tomorrow's summit.
00:15:06Bigger big shot than Elon Musk?
00:15:09Yeah. And nobody's met them, but I can introduce you.
00:15:14Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:15:17Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:15:34Angela, Mr. Vanderbilt, the richest man in Georgia, wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding.
00:15:39Vanderbilt?
00:15:41Yeah, he's actually CEO of one of our companies. Basically our employee.
00:15:44Okay, I'll meet him at the summit tomorrow. It's fine.
00:15:47You're still going to the summit tomorrow? You and Jared Cooper are already divorced.
00:15:51That's exactly why I'm going.
00:16:15Angela Lockhart.
00:16:18I finally found you.
00:16:20Who is he?
00:16:22That? That's Devin Sterling.
00:16:25He's number one on Forbes' 30 under 30 list, an early investor of crypto, CEO of Sterling Enterprises.
00:16:31Rumor has it he's worth trillions.
00:16:34And he's your fiancé.
00:16:37What? My fiancé?
00:16:41The one and only.
00:16:43So, after running away and leaving me single for three years, have you figured out how you're going to make it up to me yet, babe?
00:17:00That tiara looks perfect on you.
00:17:06What is she doing here?
00:17:08You skank! My son just divorced you yesterday and you're already hooking up with another man?
00:17:15Divorced?
00:17:17That's right. So, I guess this was never meant to be, Mr...
00:17:23Sterling. Devin Sterling.
00:17:27So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:17:30So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:17:34Guess she's not just a forsaken woman, she's also a stinky, penniless whore.
00:17:41How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:17:45Who the fuck are you, bitch?
00:17:48Do you know who I am?
00:17:50They don't know who you are.
00:17:53You hide it well.
00:17:56X-Team! Teach these fools a lesson.
00:18:01Teach these fools a lesson.
00:18:06Sir, you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta and then to New York.
00:18:11You forgot to bring the security team.
00:18:18Mind if I borrow your men?
00:18:21Go ahead.
00:18:25Chelsea's ill-mannered hips out!
00:18:28You bitch! I'll have my son teach you a real lesson!
00:18:38A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:18:42No.
00:18:50Guest list is very distinguished tonight.
00:18:52You've got Bill Ford, Harvey Buffett, old money like me.
00:18:58Gentlemen, Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper.
00:19:01Pleased to meet you all.
00:19:03Your families all started empires after the Industrial Revolution. What an honor.
00:19:07I heard you secured the Maple Plaza project.
00:19:10It's worth billions of dollars.
00:19:12Congrats. You'll be next.
00:19:14Thank you. But we haven't received the contract yet. We deserve it.
00:19:18That's nothing. I introduced this kid to Ellen Musk.
00:19:20Vanderbilts and Miss Musk have always had a good relationship.
00:19:24So, I thought I'd help the kid out, pull a few strings.
00:19:28Thank you, Mr. Vanderbilt.
00:19:30Now, we just have to impress Miss Musk's special guest of honor.
00:19:34Yes. I heard they're a very important and powerful guest.
00:19:38Even wealthier than Ellen Musk.
00:19:41Now, if we can just secure a position with this big shot, we can feast for generations.
00:19:51I'll do my best.
00:19:57Excuse me. A second, gentlemen.
00:19:59What if it's the Prince of Bhutan?
00:20:04How did a hobo like you sneak in here?
00:20:07Me? A hobo? How did a cheating scumbag like you sneak in here?
00:20:12You sleep your way in?
00:20:14I told you, Angela Lockhart, don't bother stalking me.
00:20:16Nothing will come of it, and it only sickens me further.
00:20:18Don't flatter yourself.
00:20:23This is your ex-husband?
00:20:27What, were you blindfolded when you married him?
00:20:30Who the hell is this? You were cheating on me?
00:20:32You were cheating on me?
00:20:45Son, you have to avenge me and Kaylee.
00:20:49That wicked ex-wife of yours hired some thugs and a gigolo to beat us up.
00:20:54They even took Kaylee's tiara.
00:21:03You dare hurt my mom and Kaylee?
00:21:08Get your hands off of her!
00:21:14My lady.
00:21:33My queen.
00:21:46It's... it's him!
00:21:49He scammed a million dollars off me in a game of poker yesterday.
00:21:53Who are these peasants?
00:21:55These seats are reserved for the Ellen Muskiner special guest.
00:22:00Oh, shut up, old man.
00:22:03You're disturbing the peace.
00:22:07Fuckers, you know who that is?
00:22:09That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:22:11You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:22:14His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:22:18This civil war would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:22:21Vanderbilt.
00:22:23The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt.
00:22:28Who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:22:32That only Vanderbilt family.
00:22:41Oh, goddammit.
00:22:43Stomachache now?
00:22:47Whatever.
00:22:49Angela can handle herself. She'll be fine.
00:23:03How dare you call one of us low?
00:23:06I'm Harvey F. N. Buffett.
00:23:08The most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:23:11I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:23:16And I can wipe you out with just a strand of my hair.
00:23:20Not with me around.
00:23:22I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen.
00:23:27You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:23:32You're fucking delusional, Angela.
00:23:35We've had enough of your games.
00:23:37Security! Break their limbs and toss them out.
00:23:41Looks like the old guard is teaming up against you.
00:23:44But don't worry. You got new money here.
00:23:49I can handle myself, thank you.
00:23:51Yes, my queen.
00:23:53You're all despicable.
00:23:56An insult to your family names.
00:23:58Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:24:02Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:24:05Cut off all business ties.
00:24:08And if you don't,
00:24:11I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:24:16I'll do it.
00:24:18You're here to fuck with me.
00:24:20You can't fool anyone here.
00:24:22How much money did you spend on that getup?
00:24:24And to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:24:26You're an orphan.
00:24:28Who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:24:31You have nothing.
00:24:33And you will always be nothing.
00:24:35She's a gold digger.
00:24:38Gold digger?
00:24:40Gigolo.
00:24:42Wanna try me for a night?
00:24:44Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:24:46Mr. Vanderbilt, we really shouldn't keep these bandits here any longer.
00:24:49They might upset Miss Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:24:52Angela Lockhart is my spurned ex-wife.
00:24:54She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza project.
00:24:56Oh, I'm gonna kill that sushi chef!
00:24:59Security!
00:25:05Security!
00:25:07You all don't realize that you actually all work for me.
00:25:11And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:25:13You!
00:25:15Insolent fools.
00:25:17Let me guess.
00:25:19You're that special guest?
00:25:21I don't know.
00:25:23Throw them out!
00:25:24And not without some broken bones, too.
00:25:33Back down, ass.
00:25:38I got this.
00:25:55Whoa!
00:25:57Hey! Hey!
00:26:05What the hell are you two doing here?
00:26:08I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:26:10No, you're supposed to make sure Miss Lockhart is okay.
00:26:13Oh my God, we're so screwed!
00:26:24Angela!
00:26:26Don't hurt her!
00:26:28You bitch. I've always been sick of you.
00:26:30You just threw yourself at me.
00:26:32How dare you insult my boss like that?
00:26:34Boss?
00:26:36Did she say her boss?
00:26:38Miss Musk? That's Ellen Musk?
00:26:40That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:26:43My boss and sole heiress to the Henry Lockhart's fortune.
00:26:46Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:26:49Past the American Revolution?
00:26:51Back to the Renaissance.
00:26:52If she's your boss, then that means Angela Lockhart is...
00:26:55That's Lady Lockhart to you. She's royalty.
00:26:58And since you're all subsidiaries, she's your boss's boss.
00:27:02What the hell did you do?
00:27:04Kneel to me!
00:27:06Oh, Your Majesty.
00:27:08Welcome to the United States.
00:27:11We've always been your loyal subjects.
00:27:14Yes, Your Highness.
00:27:16Is it a queen or princess?
00:27:18It doesn't matter.
00:27:19My queen, please forgive our insolence.
00:27:22We didn't mean to offend.
00:27:25Hey, what are you doing, idiot?
00:27:27Let go of the boss, lady, and beg for forgiveness!
00:27:39What rightfully belongs to you.
00:27:50She's a badass herself.
00:27:52He missed out on a good wife.
00:27:54You, you, you told me your wife was a hippie peddler.
00:27:58Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag this entire time.
00:28:01No, no, don't believe their lies.
00:28:03I worked hard for everything.
00:28:05You worked for everything?
00:28:08I'm sorry.
00:28:10I'm sorry.
00:28:12I'm sorry.
00:28:14I'm sorry.
00:28:16I'm sorry.
00:28:17So, am I supposed to do everything?
00:28:23Hey, Henri.
00:28:25So, our third year anniversary is coming up and I thought that maybe we could do something special this year.
00:28:31I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:28:33I have to figure out a bid for the Maple Plaza Project and if I get it, I can take the company public.
00:28:38You were nothing before me.
00:28:48All your achievements, all your glory, that's all mine, including the Maple Plaza contract.
00:28:56I can take all of that away, just like that.
00:29:00No, you can't take that away from me.
00:29:03That's why Ellen Musk was urging us to pass on deals to this nobody.
00:29:07Oh, and this antique wedding ring, yeah, I forgot to tell you.
00:29:12It was Queen Victoria's, and its worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's GDP.
00:29:23No.
00:29:24I gave you back the ring.
00:29:26I divorced a royal heiress.
00:29:28No!
00:29:29No!
00:29:30Please!
00:29:31No!
00:29:32No!
00:29:33Please take me back, baby!
00:29:34I still love you!
00:29:35Please!
00:29:38Oh, man, looks like they've started the party without us.
00:29:41No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower!
00:29:50God, these two again.
00:29:52Did he say...
00:29:53Is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:29:55President Eisenhower's descendant.
00:29:57After General Eisenhower won World War II, each of his descendants have all gone on to
00:30:01become five-star generals, the highest rank in the nation's military.
00:30:04God, you buffoons know your history.
00:30:06Sorry I'm late, babe.
00:30:07I got lost trying to find Atlanta.
00:30:09Then lost again on my way back to New York.
00:30:16And that there is, that is the legendary boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:30:21He's Dr. House's protege.
00:30:23Dr. House?
00:30:24Yes.
00:30:25I thought that was just a TV show.
00:30:26Oh, no, that's based on a real figure.
00:30:28Yep, that's me.
00:30:29Son of James House.
00:30:31Dr. House?
00:30:32He's practically my uncle.
00:30:34I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him when I was just 12 years old.
00:30:38So he's been off carrying himself a waterfall somewhere in the Netherlands for the last
00:30:4214 months.
00:30:43And I'm late because I ran out of gum and had to make a pit stop.
00:30:51Hey, Ellen.
00:30:52Who are these weirdos and why are they here?
00:30:55Uh, they're all your fiancées.
00:30:58What?
00:31:00Fiancées?
00:31:03Plural?
00:31:05Fiancées?
00:31:06Plural?
00:31:08Watch it, nerds.
00:31:09I'm her fiancé.
00:31:10No, I'm her fiancé.
00:31:12You can both shut up.
00:31:13I'm her fiancé.
00:31:15It's you.
00:31:16It's me.
00:31:17Who the hell is he?
00:31:18I'm Spider-Man.
00:31:21How are all three of these men my fiancé?
00:31:26Your father had arranged these engagements years ago, but I didn't tell you because
00:31:29he decided to marry Jared Cooper at the time.
00:31:33She has three badass fiancées and she marries his dumb ass.
00:31:39Whatever.
00:31:40Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:31:46Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:31:51At your service.
00:31:53Me too.
00:31:57Oh!
00:31:59One down, two more to go.
00:32:01She's become queen.
00:32:02Bishop to G4.
00:32:07Ow!
00:32:08Ow!
00:32:09Ow!
00:32:10What is that?
00:32:11The most germ-infested water in the Nile River.
00:32:17Rook to A8.
00:32:23Hello?
00:32:27I thought I was king.
00:32:28No, you wish.
00:32:29The king doesn't do anything, so Alan can be my king.
00:32:33Oh, fine.
00:32:38Bankrupt to four.
00:32:39It's right this second.
00:32:45I...
00:32:47I've been bankrupt!
00:32:48No!
00:32:50Who is...
00:32:57I've been bankrupt!
00:32:58No!
00:33:00I told you I would remove all of you from status and power if you didn't cooperate.
00:33:04Well, guess what?
00:33:05Game over.
00:33:06All right, boys.
00:33:08Let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:33:10Oh, that's serious business.
00:33:12I'm right with you.
00:33:15Wait for me.
00:33:16Nobody beats me to the finish line.
00:33:27Angela!
00:33:30You already have three fiancés?
00:33:33You can't accuse me of cheating.
00:33:35I want compensation.
00:33:40You greedy SOB.
00:33:42Who the fuck is that?
00:33:43My ex-husband.
00:33:45Wait, you were married?
00:33:47Yeah, and if that's a problem for you, then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:33:52More for me.
00:33:53No, no, of course not.
00:33:54Just...
00:33:55Do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:33:57Don't steal my joke.
00:33:59I can make him disappear without a trace.
00:34:01All the evidence of your past with him is gone.
00:34:04What?
00:34:05Is there something on my face?
00:34:06Uh, yeah.
00:34:07Murderous intent.
00:34:10Let's remarry.
00:34:12Let's remarry.
00:34:14You still don't realize.
00:34:16I only fell in love with you because you saved me from drowning three years ago.
00:34:24I'm sorry.
00:34:47Sir, it's an emergency.
00:34:49We need to wreck right away.
00:34:50Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:34:54Okay, I'm on my way.
00:34:58She should be okay now.
00:35:03Hey, you!
00:35:05Watch over her.
00:35:06I'll be right back.
00:35:15You saved me.
00:35:20Fuck.
00:35:21I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:35:25Fuck.
00:35:26I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:35:28You've cheated on me.
00:35:30You've hit me.
00:35:31And you've insulted me.
00:35:33And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:35:37I fucking hate you.
00:35:40And the lady black eye.
00:35:42What now?
00:35:44Yes, we understand that you are a very busy person.
00:35:48But if you're not going to give your ex-husband the Maple Plaza project...
00:35:52How about us three?
00:35:53Yes, unlike that scumbag, we won't turn on you.
00:35:57Yeah, no.
00:35:58You're all fired for trying to throw a coup.
00:36:00But...
00:36:02This is your fault, you doofus.
00:36:04We never should have believed your bullshit.
00:36:06No.
00:36:08No.
00:36:09We can't lose our positions with Elon Musk and the Lockhearts.
00:36:13Our family.
00:36:15I'll get you for this.
00:36:18Fuck.
00:36:23I never should have listened to you.
00:36:25I'm ruined because of you.
00:36:40So, what's the situation here?
00:36:43What's the matter with you?
00:36:48I don't know.
00:36:53I don't know what's the matter with you.
00:36:56Listen.
00:36:58I only met you guys a few hours ago.
00:37:00And I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:37:03But what if I told you that we've known each other for much longer than just a few hours.
00:37:09Much longer.
00:37:14Angela.
00:37:15Your parents would like to have a video call with all of you.
00:37:22My lovely princess, how are you?
00:37:25Look, your mother and I are in Italy.
00:37:27The views here are absolutely stunning.
00:37:30Perfect for a wedding, wouldn't you say?
00:37:32I heard you finally divorced that good-for-nothing, blood-sucking, freeloader husband of yours.
00:37:40Can't call his name, but...
00:37:42Anyway, congratulations.
00:37:44I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from to replace him.
00:37:49Oh, you must pick one of them to marry.
00:37:52Otherwise...
00:37:53Let me do it.
00:37:55You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:37:58Otherwise, we'll kill ourselves.
00:38:02Mom!
00:38:03Alright honey, that's it.
00:38:05Bye.
00:38:07Bye.
00:38:11So, who are you going to choose?
00:38:15Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:38:20Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:38:26That seems greedy.
00:38:33But, I can always remove the other two options.
00:38:38Hey, I may be a doctor, but I can take lives too.
00:38:42I know and have access to all the deadliest poisons in the world.
00:38:47Well, okay. No murder, please. I was just kidding.
00:38:52You have seven days to win her over.
00:38:56It's like The Bachelorette.
00:38:58I know. We'll start with challenge one.
00:39:03Welcome to the show, The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
00:39:07Today, we have our first challenge.
00:39:11What is all of this, Ellen?
00:39:14You'll see.
00:39:23Oh my god! Oh my god! Cockroaches!
00:39:26All women are afraid of cockroaches.
00:39:29And it is every man's job to save their beloved woman from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:39:34What will our three candidates do to prove their undying love for our single, but screaming her head off heiress?
00:39:49Looks like one of our contestants has already called it quits.
00:39:52It's up to the final two.
00:40:05The Three Badasses Who Want Me
00:40:18Crunchy.
00:40:20That is sick cold.
00:40:22Hey, when you're stranded in the middle of the battlefield, you'll be glad to see one of these around.
00:40:28There are two more left. Want to try one?
00:40:30God, no! No!
00:40:34Oh my god! Save me!
00:40:35Save you? You're going to save me!
00:40:40I'm a germaphobe doctor. These hands can't get germs on them. They're for surgery and saving lives.
00:41:01Thank god you're here.
00:41:05Are you alright, honey?
00:41:07Angela!
00:41:11Alright, you won the first challenge, so your reward, you get to watch over her for the night.
00:41:17Just don't cross the line, if you know what I mean.
00:41:19I'm not her scumbag husband. You have nothing to worry about.
00:41:28Honestly, even if you guys fuck, it's not like it's against the rules or anything.
00:41:31At least my girl can get some.
00:41:33I bet her husband has a small dick anyway.
00:41:37The cockroaches!
00:41:38They're gone, they're gone.
00:41:40There's nothing in this room except you and me, okay?
00:41:44I'm going to kill Ellen when I see her tomorrow.
00:41:51I need a drink.
00:42:00Whoa, easy! You're on an empty stomach.
00:42:04Why do you care?
00:42:06I'm trying to drink away your sorrows, Angela.
00:42:11You guys were right. I was blind from marrying that asshole.
00:42:16You know, I wasted three whole years of my life with him.
00:42:22He never even loved me.
00:42:24And I gave up my entire career for him.
00:42:27Do you really think that you would still be number one on the Forbes 30 under 30 list if I was around?
00:42:35You may not be number one on Forbes list, but you know what you're number one in?
00:42:41What?
00:42:45You're number one here.
00:42:47You're number one here.
00:42:54You know, we've known each other kind of a long time.
00:42:58Lies.
00:43:01You all just want something from me.
00:43:08Angela, I know it's hard to trust again.
00:43:13But I assure you, I don't care what family you're from.
00:43:20I'm the richest man in the nation. I don't need your power, your status, your wealth, your connections.
00:43:29I just need you.
00:43:33I'll prove my love to you within six days. I promise.
00:43:42Okay.
00:43:48Screw the contest. I just want love.
00:43:53Angela, you're drunk.
00:43:56I'm an adult. Can't I go just get what she wants?
00:44:00Okay.
00:44:05But love and sex aren't exactly the same thing.
00:44:08Well, they're not mutually exclusive either.
00:44:20This is what you want.
00:44:389-inch penis.
00:44:40Morning to you too. You sure you were drunk last night? You wouldn't...
00:44:45A girl remembers when she's had a 9-inch penis inside of her.
00:44:51Well, glad you enjoyed it.
00:44:54But don't tell Shane or Cole.
00:44:57I don't want to.
00:44:59I don't want to.
00:45:01I don't want to.
00:45:03I don't want to.
00:45:04But don't tell Shane or Cole.
00:45:07Because then they would...
00:45:09Say that you were being unfair?
00:45:11Technically, us having sex doesn't break any rules.
00:45:14I won the first challenge, and according to Ellen, my prize was to spend the night with you anyways.
00:45:21Don't make this any harder than it already is.
00:45:27You sure you don't want it pretty hard?
00:45:31It's not...
00:45:34Fine, fine, fine.
00:45:38I won't tell.
00:45:41But only on one condition.
00:45:44I won't tell.
00:45:47But only on one condition.
00:45:49You have to go out on a date with me.
00:45:53Fine.
00:45:57I've had a crush on you since college, Angela.
00:46:00You never noticed me.
00:46:05Um...
00:46:07You should get dressed and get out of here before anyone sees you.
00:46:12It's only 7am.
00:46:14She's still sleeping.
00:46:15I'm not sleeping alone.
00:46:16Yeah, I'm not letting my fiancé be alone with another man for another second.
00:46:22Morning, gentlemen.
00:46:24Or shall I say ruffmen?
00:46:26Oh, don't mind him.
00:46:28What's up, guys?
00:46:30We're ready for the second challenge.
00:46:32No cockroaches this time.
00:46:34No more terrifying things.
00:46:35That was my bad, Angela.
00:46:37This better be a good challenge, Ellen.
00:46:39I'm sure you'll all enjoy this one.
00:46:41The second challenge is...
00:46:43The second challenge is...
00:46:45A date.
00:46:46Lame. I should have asked for something else.
00:46:48A date?
00:46:50That's it.
00:46:51What's the catch?
00:46:52No catch.
00:46:53Just who Ms. Lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most.
00:46:56As simple as that.
00:46:57I know what I want to do.
00:46:58Let's start with me first.
00:46:59Okay.
00:47:00Who's up first?
00:47:01Then...
00:47:02Me.
00:47:03I did the best for last.
00:47:05Ain't that right, Angela?
00:47:07Then it's decided.
00:47:11Please don't take my BMW away!
00:47:14Too bad.
00:47:16You pissed off the Lockharts.
00:47:18I have nothing left!
00:47:28That bitch who ruined me!
00:47:33It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:47:43General Eisenhower, sir!
00:47:45At ease, Lieutenant!
00:47:47This is my lieutenant.
00:47:48He also manages this boxing gym.
00:47:50Pleasure to meet you, Madam Eisenhower!
00:47:52He's so serious.
00:47:53But, hang on.
00:47:55Lieutenant!
00:47:56I don't know who I'm going to marry yet!
00:47:58Baby!
00:47:59I decided to take you here on our first date
00:48:01so that I can introduce you to my guns!
00:48:03Guns?
00:48:04Like, murder weapons?
00:48:06Yes.
00:48:07Murder weapons.
00:48:28You like my guns, babe?
00:48:30Pretty Lockhart.
00:48:31Yeah.
00:48:33Let me show you what I can do with them.
00:48:35Lieutenant!
00:48:36Come close!
00:48:38Wait!
00:48:39You're just going to hit him like that?
00:48:40He's not even going to fight back?
00:48:42Fighting back would be treason, ma'am!
00:48:43Treason?
00:48:45You guys are way too serious.
00:48:48Look, you Lockhart bitch!
00:48:49I caught you!
00:48:50If I'm going down,
00:48:51you're all going down with me!
00:48:53Lieutenant!
00:48:54Pistol attack!
00:49:00Ah!
00:49:05Ah!
00:49:08You dare try to hurt my wife?
00:49:12I will make you pay!
00:49:16If you don't need to keep beating him up,
00:49:17we could just take him to the cops.
00:49:19Not when he tries to hurt you!
00:49:27He's always a bit violent.
00:49:28Some might call it being protective.
00:49:30Poor anger issues.
00:49:32What if we get married
00:49:33and I forget to use a coaster
00:49:34on an antique table or something?
00:49:36Is he going to be, like, rough?
00:49:39Hey, some girls are into that.
00:49:41I don't know if I am.
00:49:44Well, maybe Shane will be your type.
00:49:49Your date with Shane starts now.
00:49:54Hey.
00:49:56Hey.
00:49:58Cool ride.
00:50:00A gift from the Chancellor of Germany
00:50:01when I saved his wife.
00:50:03Impressive.
00:50:07Your breath smells like peppermint.
00:50:10Refreshing.
00:50:12I got cool mint, too.
00:50:14Or do you prefer spearmint?
00:50:17What do you not have in this coat of yours?
00:50:20Fruit flavored gum.
00:50:21I can't stand those.
00:50:23So, where are you taking me, Shane?
00:50:25Let me show you.
00:50:28Dr. Wilson!
00:50:30Our VIP of VIPs!
00:50:32Right this way.
00:50:34VIP of VIPs?
00:50:36Ah, just some other guy I saved.
00:50:38I forget who.
00:50:40You saved a lot of people.
00:50:42I do what I can.
00:50:44Oh, my gosh.
00:50:46It's my gold-digging neighbor
00:50:47who just got dumped by her husband.
00:50:51Sandra Miller.
00:50:53What are you doing here?
00:50:54I just thought this was for the best.
00:50:56What are you doing here?
00:50:57I just thought this was for the VIP of VIPs.
00:51:00Your mother-in-law told me all about the divorce
00:51:01and how you hired some gigolo
00:51:03to beat her and Kaylee Vanderbilt up.
00:51:07How low of you.
00:51:09What are you doing here, Sandra?
00:51:11Of course your bird brain wouldn't remember.
00:51:13I sell high fashion jewelry pieces so high-end
00:51:16you couldn't even afford
00:51:17even a few soldier organs.
00:51:20The auction begins.
00:51:22I'll deal with you later.
00:51:24Here, I'll just be one second.
00:51:30Cameron, I have a task for you.
00:51:35Our next piece is absolutely extraordinary.
00:51:39Cleopatra's armband,
00:51:41sold by our vendor, Sandra Miller,
00:51:44for five million dollars.
00:51:47Excuse me.
00:51:49I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:51:51It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:51:54I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:51:57It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:51:59What are you doing?
00:52:01Just watch.
00:52:07That is Queen Victoria's ring?
00:52:10Please, I'm an expert and that's a fake.
00:52:13She probably got it at the flea market she works at.
00:52:16You work at a flea market?
00:52:18Not this again.
00:52:19Cut the bullshit.
00:52:21That wouldn't even sell for five dollars.
00:52:23Oh yeah?
00:52:25Here, you want it? For free.
00:52:27Ew, I don't want that trash from a stinky hippie peddler.
00:52:30Well, that's too bad then,
00:52:33because you are the fraud.
00:52:36What are you talking about?
00:52:38Who the hell are you to accuse me?
00:52:40Throw them out.
00:52:42Dr. Wilson, I know you're a legend in medicine,
00:52:45but we're professionals.
00:52:47Oh yeah?
00:52:49My armband sells for five million dollars?
00:52:51Yeah, mine is the real thing.
00:52:54You two are just upset because you're too poor
00:52:57to afford our luxury items.
00:52:59Oh, is that so?
00:53:01When a so-called expert
00:53:03failed to recognize Queen Victoria's ring then?
00:53:05Dear Lord,
00:53:07this is real.
00:53:09It's authentic.
00:53:11It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:53:16Karen, what have you found?
00:53:17Yeah, that picture of Cleopatra's armband you sent me?
00:53:20It's a replica.
00:53:23They had the same one right here at the flea market.
00:53:26So,
00:53:28you are the fraud.
00:53:30You just went to the flea market
00:53:32so you can buy some fakes.
00:53:34And Cameron,
00:53:36how much are these fakes being sold for?
00:53:38150.
00:53:40Wow, not even five dollars.
00:53:42Sandra.
00:53:44You've been duping us the whole time?
00:53:47Arrest her!
00:53:49No, please!
00:53:51This is my time!
00:53:53Please!
00:53:55What's going on, Dr. Wilson?
00:53:57Uh, investigating lead poisoning from cheap jewelry
00:53:59for the Emperor of Japan. Bye.
00:54:01Black Callista from the jewelry industry forever.
00:54:11I had a really great time tonight.
00:54:14Me too.
00:54:15May I
00:54:17have a kiss?
00:54:33Something wrong?
00:54:35Do you always have gum in your mouth?
00:54:42Yep.
00:54:43You never have to worry about stinky breath for me.
00:54:54You
00:54:56owe us a bunch of money, Cooper.
00:54:59I don't have any money.
00:55:01How did you pay for this hotel then?
00:55:04I guess you'll only pay up
00:55:08if I break your other leg.
00:55:11Stop!
00:55:14Mr. Vanderbilt.
00:55:18Mr. Buffett.
00:55:23This is the contract for the Maple Plaza project.
00:55:26That's right.
00:55:28Miss Musk wanted me to give it to you.
00:55:30I knew Angelo was still in love with me.
00:55:33I knew Angelo was still in love with me.
00:55:35No, no, sir.
00:55:37Sorry about those injuries from earlier.
00:55:39It was all just a little misunderstanding.
00:55:41Yeah, we could be partners.
00:55:43Partners again.
00:55:45And then maybe you can
00:55:47tell Lady Lockhart
00:55:49to put in a good word for us?
00:55:51Angela still loves me.
00:55:53She's just throwing a fit.
00:55:55She'll be back to me soon enough.
00:55:57Yeah, do you need any help winning her back?
00:55:59We can give you jewelry to give to her.
00:56:01I was just sucking up to these pricks a few days ago
00:56:04and now they're all begging me to help them out.
00:56:06It feels so damn good to be in power.
00:56:09Sure.
00:56:11I'll put in a good word for you.
00:56:13I just need...
00:56:15Anything you tell us, we'll give you anything.
00:56:17Once I take everything from these idiots
00:56:20I'll go after Angela Lockhart
00:56:23for my revenge.
00:56:29I'm giving the contract to Jared Cooper
00:56:31just like you asked me to.
00:56:33Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:56:37Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:56:40I don't get it, Miss Musk.
00:56:41My contract has a preliminary clause.
00:56:44It requires him to pay 50% of the costs up front.
00:56:46It's a deposit.
00:56:48And if he can't, then what?
00:56:50He'll be bankrupt.
00:56:52So as long as he's greedy, I have to take it.
00:56:54I'm avenging my best friend.
00:56:56I want to show the world that without Angela Lockhart
00:56:59he's nothing.
00:57:06I signed the Maple Plaza project.
00:57:09We should celebrate.
00:57:11You see, I know my son has it in him.
00:57:14That skank Angela is nothing next to you.
00:57:17And it's all thanks to you, sweetheart.
00:57:20Actually, it's thanks to Angela.
00:57:25What?
00:57:27You're trying to ditch me to go back to your wife?
00:57:30Oh, no, no, no. He's not.
00:57:32Jared, what are you doing?
00:57:34You have such a beautiful and bright future ahead of you.
00:57:37It's my decision, Mom.
00:57:39I'm the head of the house here.
00:57:41I'm telling my dad.
00:57:43Fine. Go right ahead. He has enough problems himself.
00:57:46If you're obedient, I'll keep you around as his side piece.
00:57:49But if not, you can scram.
00:57:51Dad, Jared is being mean to me.
00:57:55Teach him a lesson.
00:57:57Kaylee, be a good girl, okay?
00:57:59Jared has the backing of some very powerful people now.
00:58:02Don't get on his bad side.
00:58:04We can't afford to piss him off.
00:58:06So do as he says.
00:58:08But, Dad...
00:58:12I'm sorry.
00:58:14I'll be your side piece.
00:58:16Very good.
00:58:18I'm happy you've come around.
00:58:20Now, let's go celebrate.
00:58:24I mean, do I really want to be with Mr. Minty Mouth forever, though?
00:58:29But that tongue action, though.
00:58:31Tongue is important.
00:58:33In more than just one spot.
00:58:35Ellen, we are in public.
00:58:37It's true.
00:58:38Stomachache.
00:58:40Again?
00:58:42I have to run to the bathroom.
00:58:44Devin should be here to pick you up soon.
00:58:46Okay.
00:58:48Devin's late.
00:58:50Not a good sign for a date.
00:58:53This hotel restaurant has five Michelin stars.
00:58:57It's her.
00:58:59And she's alone.
00:59:01With no one to save her.
00:59:04You whore.
00:59:05You whore.
00:59:07You seduced my son so he'd get back with you.
00:59:12Let me tell you.
00:59:14I would never go back even if your entire family got down on their knees and begged me.
00:59:21Hey, you guys can fight all you want, but you need to take this somewhere else.
00:59:25Whoever gets rid of her for me gets all this.
00:59:28What? Why do I have to leave?
00:59:30She's the one starting shit.
00:59:32Because I have money and you don't.
00:59:33And you don't.
00:59:35You're just a stinky hippie peddler and my son just signed a 100 billion dollar contract.
00:59:40He still got the contract?
00:59:42Hmm.
00:59:44Must be Ellen's doing.
00:59:46Even if he does sign it, he doesn't have the liquidity to pay the deposit up front.
00:59:50Oh, he's just gonna...
00:59:52Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:59:55Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:59:57You take my charity and toss it in my face as if it's your own.
01:00:02My maid wouldn't even pick up such a pitiful amount.
01:00:05$1,000 to take her away.
01:00:08$2,000 to drag her away.
01:00:11$5,000 to beat her away.
01:00:16Oh! Oh! Hey! Hey!
01:00:19Ow! Ow!
01:00:23You okay?
01:00:25You okay? Are you hurt?
01:00:32Weakling.
01:00:34You! You! Just a few days ago you found yourself a boy toy right after getting divorced.
01:00:39And now you have two more?
01:00:41What a whore.
01:00:43What a whore.
01:00:45Yeah. And Jared wanted to get back with her?
01:00:47What if she has an STD?
01:00:49Oh, like sleeping with a married man wouldn't give you an STD.
01:00:52Let's go. We'll expose her to Jared.
01:00:56Hang on.
01:00:58What do you want?
01:01:00I'll scream!
01:01:02I don't hit women. But I never said I don't kill women.
01:01:06But I never said I don't kill women.
01:01:09Oh, God. He is a murderer.
01:01:12What if he murders me?
01:01:14Not him. Definitely not him.
01:01:16We're not afraid of you.
01:01:19That's enough. This isn't a war zone.
01:01:21You'll be removed from being a five-star general if you hurt a civilian without adequate cause.
01:01:26I was just messing with him.
01:01:28Was he, though?
01:01:30We're not afraid of you.
01:01:32Jared! You have to avenge us.
01:01:35Look at this slut. She's found two more boy toys.
01:01:38She's cheating on you. Don't get back with her.
01:01:40Oh, Mr. Cooper, it's you. I apologize.
01:01:42I'll toss out the potty crashes immediately so that you can go to your salvation banquet.
01:01:46Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:01:49Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:01:51The potty crashes.
01:01:55Do you have any idea who that is?
01:01:57That's my wife.
01:01:59We saved that title for the real skank over there.
01:02:02That's right. Know your place.
01:02:05Shut up.
01:02:07She's cheating on you.
01:02:08Know your place.
01:02:10You're just a side piece, if I still want you, that is.
01:02:13Eric, have you gone mad?
01:02:15This is Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
01:02:18You slap her for this whore?
01:02:20Mom!
01:02:22They really think they're something, huh?
01:02:24Angela's an heiress to a family whose wealth and status goes back to the Victorian age.
01:02:28She's richer even than Ellen Musk.
01:02:31I only got the Maple Plaza project because she gave it to me.
01:02:35What?
01:02:36You apologize right now or I will kick you and your father to the curb.
01:02:46I'm sorry.
01:02:48No.
01:02:50This can't be.
01:02:52I made you a divorce.
01:02:57Go home.
01:02:59You're not suited to come with me to my celebration banquet.
01:03:07I apologize on behalf of my mother.
01:03:11Honey, I know you came here to celebrate my achievements.
01:03:15I promise no one will bother you anymore.
01:03:18I didn't come here for you.
01:03:21I'm on a date.
01:03:23A date with two men at the same time?
01:03:26She really is a whore.
01:03:28Angela, please forgive me.
01:03:30I really do love you.
01:03:31Oho! Lady Lockhart is here!
01:03:36Oho! Lady Lockhart is here!
01:03:40Yeah, yeah, we already know you beat Ford's ass.
01:03:44We're too old for that.
01:03:46They're here for my celebration banquet.
01:03:48Please, you gave me the contract, so if anyone should go as my guest of honor, it should be you.
01:03:54Oh, yes, please, Miss Lockhart, join us.
01:03:57We'll all be one happy business family.
01:03:59We'll all be one happy business family again.
01:04:02What the hell are you all doing here?
01:04:04Where were you?
01:04:06Stomach issues.
01:04:08Again? Would you like my diagnosis?
01:04:11No.
01:04:13Let me make myself clear, okay?
01:04:16I would rather die than be with you again.
01:04:20Seems that they're not actually on good terms.
01:04:24I can't lose face in front of these pricks, otherwise they'll cut me off too.
01:04:27Angela, I know you're still mad, but please give me a chance, I'll prove it to you.
01:04:32You want a chance?
01:04:34Angela, no. You have three great guys here who all want to marry you.
01:04:38Don't take him back.
01:04:40I'll give you two choices.
01:04:44I'll give you two choices.
01:04:47Me, or the contract.
01:04:51You're kidding me.
01:04:53No, I'm not kidding you.
01:04:54If you choose me, we can remarry this week.
01:04:58But you don't get the hundred billion dollar contract.
01:05:02The choice is all yours.
01:05:04That's a tough choice.
01:05:07You think so? He either marries a royal heiress or gets a contract that takes his company to the moon.
01:05:11Either way, he benefits.
01:05:13Why can't I have both?
01:05:15You really are a greedy bastard.
01:05:18Angela, I saved you in the pool, remember? I deserve the contract.
01:05:21Did you really?
01:05:27Look who's fashionably late now.
01:05:30He didn't save her at the pool.
01:05:32Wait, what are you talking about?
01:05:35I choose the contract.
01:05:38I knew it. You'll get what's coming to you.
01:05:41With this contract, my company's earning potential is limitless.
01:05:46Angela Lockhart, you humiliated me in front of everyone.
01:05:49I will get you one day.
01:05:51Let me show you something.
01:06:04You saved me.
01:06:11You saved me.
01:06:13I'm sorry.
01:06:14I'm sorry if his lies led to you wasting three years of your life.
01:06:20But I promise you, I'm going to make it up to you with the rest of our lives.
01:06:26No, no, I wasn't lying. I just couldn't remember exactly what happened that day.
01:06:38Does that mean we both each saved her once?
01:06:42What?
01:06:44Me and Dr. Wilson losing at saving people? No way.
01:06:49You guys, one of you, do something life-threatening right now.
01:06:53You're crazy.
01:06:55And actually, they've all been doing horrible shit behind your back.
01:07:00What?
01:07:03Mr. Sterling had me investigate their company's dealings.
01:07:06Turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts.
01:07:09Put it simply, they've been stealing from you.
01:07:12I can't believe I didn't realize.
01:07:15Ms. Lockhart, I'm so sorry. I should have had third-party accountants check thoroughly.
01:07:20No, it's not your fault. They're just too slick.
01:07:23You'd like me to punish them for that?
01:07:25Oh God, no. Not that again. Please.
01:07:28Max, you know what to do.
01:07:43The banks have pulled all of our funds.
01:07:47All business ties have been severed.
01:07:49We're bankrupt!
01:07:55How did you do that?
01:07:57Who are you? And don't say Spider-Man!
01:08:01I'll tell you who I am.
01:08:05I'll tell you who I am.
01:08:09I am...
01:08:10I am...
01:08:12Crypto Punk Number Two!
01:08:14What did he say he was?
01:08:16That's more bizarre than Spider-Man.
01:08:18You're Crypto Punk Number Two?
01:08:21Well, I'm Crypto Punk Number One.
01:08:24See? You are number one at something.
01:08:26The most expensive NFT collection in the world.
01:08:29Forget Forbes' list.
01:08:31It's all about young money now.
01:08:33So, how about our date?
01:08:40I'm not letting them one-up me on this one.
01:08:43I'll spy too.
01:08:57They forgot to cancel my contract.
01:09:00I still have the 100 billion dollar project.
01:09:03Yes! I'm rich!
01:09:06I think I'll make them all pay soon!
01:09:10Yeah.
01:09:14What?
01:09:16Mr. Cooper, sir.
01:09:18The Maple Plaza contract requires us to provide 50% of the costs up front.
01:09:22Otherwise, it's a breach of contract and we'll have to pay for all financial repercussions.
01:09:26No!
01:09:28I'm bankrupt!
01:09:30I'm under the law, Carter.
01:09:32You tricked me!
01:09:33Yay!
01:09:39Allow me.
01:09:42I'm sorry I was late, my queen.
01:09:45I had to get some very important materials
01:09:48for our special date.
01:09:51Well, cheers.
01:09:53Cheers.
01:09:54Cheers.
01:10:03This looks good.
01:10:08Did you use my spices?
01:10:11I know your ex-in-law has never appreciated you.
01:10:16You can have all the money and power in the world
01:10:19and you still can't force a man to love you.
01:10:22I couldn't even remember our anniversary.
01:10:28Angel.
01:10:31Your future
01:10:33with me
01:10:35is gonna be different.
01:10:37Come on.
01:10:39Upstairs.
01:10:52Wow.
01:10:54Devon, I can't believe this is what I've been missing out on
01:10:58these past few years
01:11:00just because of some silly mistake.
01:11:03Angela.
01:11:05I've known and loved you for three whole years.
01:11:08Actually,
01:11:10I've also loved you for three years.
01:11:13That's right.
01:11:15I fell in love with you three years ago, too.
01:11:17How are you?
01:11:18I fell in love with you three years ago, too.
01:11:21How is all of this possible?
01:11:24I didn't meet any of you until recently.
01:11:27Well, actually, maybe Devon, but...
01:11:31I've had a crush on you since college.
01:11:34You were my motivation to go to business school.
01:11:38Despite who you were,
01:11:40you never judged me for being poor.
01:11:42Are you trying to get hired at Fortune 500
01:11:46in a suit like that?
01:11:50All you do is babble on and on
01:11:53about Internet money, Bitcoin, and shit like that.
01:11:58Are you trying to steal my spot?
01:12:02I'll teach you a lesson.
01:12:05Hey! Get away from him!
01:12:07Angela!
01:12:08Get away from him!
01:12:09Angela!
01:12:11Fancy girl.
01:12:13I like her.
01:12:24How is he?
01:12:26It's a rare poison
01:12:28made from a mixture of dried roots found in Africa.
01:12:31Can it be cured?
01:12:33I actually think I know that poison.
01:12:35It sounds really scary,
01:12:36but its cure can actually be found in any developed country.
01:12:39Household salt.
01:12:47I like her.
01:12:50There you go.
01:12:52What time is it?
01:12:55Oh, shoot. I'm late for swim practice.
01:13:04I like her.
01:13:07We have been rivals ever since.
01:13:09So, that's how I...
01:13:12well, we all met.
01:13:15I barely remember.
01:13:17I should have never let you go to swim practice that day.
01:13:19Matthew Richards,
01:13:21the guy who poisoned me,
01:13:23tapped you out of revenge.
01:13:24You wouldn't have known.
01:13:26I did hear he dropped out and became a loan shark, though.
01:13:28If that makes you feel any better.
01:13:30Yeah, I think that suits him a little better.
01:13:32Angela, your seven days is almost up.
01:13:34Now that you know
01:13:36they all loved and fought for you for three years,
01:13:38who will you pick?
01:13:44How can that be?
01:13:46Angela Lockhart is an heiress?
01:13:53Kaylee, we've gone bankrupt.
01:13:57Bankrupt?
01:13:59The Vanderbilts have gone bankrupt?
01:14:01Bankrupt?
01:14:03Well then, get out of here!
01:14:05You can't do this to me!
01:14:09Jared!
01:14:11Mom, it's me.
01:14:13What happened?
01:14:15Jared, I have carefully reconsidered.
01:14:17Angela is way better than this dimwit.
01:14:19You should get back with your wife.
01:14:21We're bankrupt.
01:14:23What?
01:14:27Jared Cooper.
01:14:29We're here to propose to your belongings.
01:14:33No one is going to save you now.
01:14:36Mom!
01:14:40What kind of an asshole
01:14:42throws his own mother to the dogs?
01:14:47Who will you pick?
01:14:50I...
01:14:51I...
01:14:57I brought you fried chicken.
01:14:59Fried chicken?
01:15:01Hey, not all girls like sushi and caviar.
01:15:03Yeah, he's right.
01:15:05I did live in Atlanta for three months.
01:15:07Sucking up last minute!
01:15:09At least I don't speak like an AI robot.
01:15:11Hey, stop. Stop.
01:15:13Welcome back to the bachelorette.
01:15:16I mean, the three badasses who want me.
01:15:18I mean, Angela Lockhart,
01:15:21you know what I mean.
01:15:23Today, our heiress bachelorette will choose
01:15:26which one of our three badasses will she marry.
01:15:30Will it be Shane, the doctor?
01:15:34Cole, the general?
01:15:38Or Devin, the CEO?
01:15:43Uh, looks like our bachelorette
01:15:46may need a little more time to decide.
01:15:48Oh, the suspense is killing me.
01:15:51But when she does,
01:15:53she will take this eternal rose
01:15:55made from glass imported from Venice
01:15:57and give it to our woman.
01:15:59Angela.
01:16:02Angela.
01:16:04Oh, I...
01:16:07I need more time to think.
01:16:13While our bachelorette
01:16:15takes a little time to decide,
01:16:16why don't we check in with each of our candidates?
01:16:19Let's check in with each of our candidates.
01:16:22Let's start with Cole.
01:16:24Cole.
01:16:28There's not much to say.
01:16:30Who wouldn't want a five-star general
01:16:32who has huge biceps,
01:16:35a massive chest,
01:16:37who would protect their wife?
01:16:41Okay, thank you.
01:16:45Uh, Shane?
01:16:48Muscles, money,
01:16:50they won't get you so far.
01:16:52But you need a well-balanced man like me
01:16:54that has more than one way
01:16:56to keep a lady happy,
01:16:58if you know what I mean.
01:17:01Okay, I think we do.
01:17:03And Devin?
01:17:06That was quite disgusting.
01:17:10I just hope Angela's okay.
01:17:11I know she's going under a lot of stress right now.
01:17:14A lot of choices to make.
01:17:16And she's my queen.
01:17:18I just really hope she's okay.
01:17:20Now, one more thing.
01:17:22What kind of a doctor
01:17:24brings fried chicken to a girl?
01:17:27That's a good point.
01:17:29It's bad for her heart.
01:17:31And then you!
01:17:33Well, you know what they say about military men.
01:17:36They beef their wives.
01:17:39No!
01:17:42Stand up!
01:17:44Hey, you guys.
01:17:47Whoa, break it up!
01:17:49Hey!
01:17:51Break it up!
01:17:57Cut to commercial!
01:17:59Cut to commercial!
01:18:08Cut to commercial!
01:18:19This is the hardest decision
01:18:21I've ever had to make in my entire life.
01:18:24Who do I choose?
01:18:33Angela's marrying me!
01:18:35But not stealing her from me.
01:18:36Oh yeah?
01:18:38I may be a doctor,
01:18:40but like I said,
01:18:42I know and possess the deadliest poisons in the world.
01:18:46What don't you have in that coat?
01:18:48Fruit flavored gum.
01:18:50I won't let you take Angela away from me.
01:18:52I'll fight you to the death.
01:18:54Don't forget about me.
01:18:56It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:19:01These stupid profile cards
01:19:03don't make any sense.
01:19:04They do not help.
01:19:06Who made these?
01:19:25It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:19:30I'm actually a part of the X-Men.
01:19:33And I have the power of telekinesis!
01:19:52We may have to work together to take him down.
01:20:03This battle within our heads
01:20:05is the most intense I've ever experienced.
01:20:08I may not be able to take them both down
01:20:10if they decide to team up.
01:20:12Hmm...
01:20:13Wintermate or Coolmate?
01:20:19You know,
01:20:21I've always really liked your hair.
01:20:23Really?
01:20:25I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it.
01:20:28So I appreciate that.
01:20:29Hey, hey, hey.
01:20:31And you know,
01:20:32Cool,
01:20:33I've always really liked the way you talk.
01:20:36Really?
01:20:37Yeah.
01:20:40What do you got for me?
01:20:42I always
01:20:44really like the way you chew gum.
01:20:46Yeah?
01:20:47It's fresh, right?
01:20:51You know, you're actually
01:20:53a really good doctor.
01:20:55You need me to look at you?
01:20:56I got you.
01:20:57Hey, me?
01:20:59Angela's been kidnapped!
01:21:01Angela's been kidnapped!
01:21:03It was Jared Cooper!
01:21:05That fucker!
01:21:07We have to find her.
01:21:08What, how?
01:21:09Her ring.
01:21:10Her dad installed a GPS tracking mechanism
01:21:12on her ring just in case.
01:21:14Well, let's go then!
01:21:15My love!
01:21:16My fiancé!
01:21:17My fiancé!
01:21:23Jared...
01:21:28What am I doing here?
01:21:30You destroyed me.
01:21:33I took everything.
01:21:36What?
01:21:37I have nothing left.
01:21:39It's not my fault you're too greedy.
01:21:42I was greedy
01:21:44to have sex with my wife.
01:21:46What?
01:21:47I'm not your wife anymore!
01:21:49Oh yeah, I know.
01:21:50You wouldn't take me back now,
01:21:51not unless I get you pregnant with my child.
01:21:53This is illegal!
01:21:54You wouldn't want your child
01:21:55to be away from its father.
01:21:56You won't have me arrested.
01:21:58You will take me back.
01:22:01Come on, bitch!
01:22:04I'll settle you down a little.
01:22:14You will be begging me to fuck you soon!
01:22:19Hey!
01:22:21Angela!
01:22:22Come here!
01:22:23Angela!
01:22:24Come here!
01:22:28It's too late!
01:22:29I drugged her.
01:22:30She'll be dead soon,
01:22:31unless...
01:22:32Yet?
01:22:33Have you forgotten who I am?
01:22:35He really does have everything in his coat.
01:22:37Everything except for fruit.
01:22:38Yeah, except for fruit-flavored gum.
01:22:39We get it already.
01:22:40Just save my boss!
01:22:43Here you go.
01:22:49You're all good now.
01:22:51Oh, thank God.
01:22:53But what do we do with that piece of shit?
01:22:55What?
01:22:56What are you going to do to me?
01:22:58Hey, stop!
01:22:59No!
01:23:01Enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever.
01:23:09Glad we didn't actually have that fight.
01:23:11Turns out he's the most dangerous of them all.
01:23:19So who did you pick, sweetheart?
01:23:21We've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding.
01:23:24The Prince of Bhutan.
01:23:26And remember,
01:23:27we will kill ourselves if you don't choose.
01:23:34Welcome back to the finale of
01:23:36The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:23:39We're down to the wire.
01:23:40Literally.
01:23:41The wedding day.
01:23:42But who's the groom?
01:23:52Welcome back to the finale of
01:23:54The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:23:56But who's the groom?
01:24:00Uh,
01:24:01seems our heiress still hasn't decided.
01:24:05Any input from the parents?
01:24:07Maybe that will help sway our bachelorette's choice.
01:24:11This is exciting!
01:24:13Who should my daughter pick?
01:24:16Let me think.
01:24:17Let me think.
01:24:18I like the doctor.
01:24:20He's cute.
01:24:23But the general looks like a strong fellow.
01:24:28And we can't forget about Devon Sterling,
01:24:30the one who's loved her the longest.
01:24:31Isn't that right, Devon?
01:24:33Angela.
01:24:40You are all three
01:24:42the most beautiful women I've ever met.
01:24:45You are all three
01:24:47very fine gentlemen.
01:24:51And I'm really grateful
01:24:53for all of your love.
01:24:55But
01:24:56this was a really hard decision.
01:24:58And
01:25:00I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:25:04And
01:25:06I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:25:12I'm just kidding.
01:25:13I'm just as sick of this as you guys are.
01:25:19Each of our candidates have saved our main character.
01:25:23I mean, bachelorette, once.
01:25:25They've all proven their undying love.
01:25:28So who gets to unlock Angela Lockhart's heart?
01:25:31Literally.
01:25:34Could it be
01:25:35the sexy and protective,
01:25:37general with a temper,
01:25:39Mr. Cole Eisenhower?
01:25:44Or
01:25:46the fun, wicked-minded, but
01:25:49kind of weird,
01:25:51Dr. Shane Wilson?
01:25:55And last but not least,
01:25:57could it be
01:25:58the richest man of them all,
01:26:00the man Angela would have married a long time ago,
01:26:03Mr. Devon Sterling?
01:26:07Gentlemen.
01:26:09It's been a pleasure getting to know you.
01:26:12May the best man win.
01:26:15May the best man win.
01:26:18Drum roll, please.
01:26:33Seriously, Ricky?
01:26:41I choose...
01:26:51I need a powerful, strong man
01:26:53who I really feel like he can protect me.
01:26:58Who could resist those guns?
01:27:02Would it interest you in an N.F.D., Ellen?
01:27:04Would you like a full-body checkup?
01:27:12I need a powerful, strong man
01:27:14who I really feel like he can protect me.
01:27:20Shane, it's you.
01:27:22I'm lovesick for you.
01:27:24You like that minty flavor, don't you?
01:27:29It's that tongue action, ladies and gents.
01:27:32Ellen, be my new queen.
01:27:33I hope we can go together.
01:27:35Thanks, babe.
01:27:36Love you, boy.
01:27:41I love you.
01:27:48It's always been you.
01:27:58I'll always love you.
01:28:02Let's give it up for those nine inches, everybody.
01:28:04Ms. Morello, is that one?
01:28:06Would you like a full-body checkup?
01:28:07Have you seen my murdering weapons?
01:28:08I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:28:11I'll be right back.
01:28:42I, Selene Lovett,
01:28:44accept my role as Nightwind's pack Luna
01:28:47and your wife.
01:28:50I, Alexander Kane,
01:28:53fucking love you.
01:28:58Yeah!
01:28:59Woo!
01:29:00Yes!
01:29:06Oh, boy.
01:29:09Oh, boy.
01:29:12Wow.
01:29:13Two alphas together.