Los Tres Badasses Que Me Quieren (sub es) - The Three Badasses Who Want Me
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Sir, I found Angela Lockhart.
00:00:13Angela, still selling your hippie junk here?
00:00:16I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity.
00:00:21Now sign the divorce paper.
00:00:24Baby, I'll sign it.
00:00:29Don't move right ahead.
00:00:33My lovely princess, I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from.
00:00:39I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:00:44You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:00:47I'm going. I need to pick up my bride.
00:00:52Prepare my warplane!
00:00:54Don't you worry, I'll come back to you after this.
00:00:59What's the situation here?
00:01:01I want to marry you.
00:01:14Ellen Musk, the only woman on the Forbes 30 under 30 list, arrives in Atlanta today.
00:01:20What a business tycoon is doing here in Georgia, a forgotten stage no one knows.
00:01:25Angela, my next door neighbor, still selling your hippie junk here?
00:01:30If your mother-in-law sees, she's going to throw a big fit again.
00:01:35Your mother-in-law was right about you.
00:01:37What's the point of watching the news all day about these moguls if you can't even apply it to your penniless self?
00:01:42And how do you know that this is none of my business?
00:01:46Alright, everybody get out!
00:01:49We got an important guest coming!
00:01:53You!
00:01:58You deaf? I said pack up and scram!
00:02:01I paid the staff here already, and if you want me to leave, then fine, but you have to compensate for today's losses.
00:02:08You want to say that again?
00:02:12You know who's visiting today?
00:02:14Ellen freaking Musk, one of the richest people in the world.
00:02:18Ellen Musk?
00:02:19Of course a hick like you probably never heard of her.
00:02:21Just know that you can't afford to piss her off.
00:02:25Really? Ellen Musk is flying all the way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market?
00:02:31You don't think that she could be coming to see me?
00:02:38Coming to see you?
00:02:40Alright, you know what? I'll play your game.
00:02:42If she does this so much as give you a glance, I'll eat dirt.
00:02:49Deal.
00:02:58Ellen Musk, get to the flea market within ten minutes.
00:03:02Or else, you're fired.
00:03:20Prepare the limo. Ms. Lockhart requires us immediately.
00:03:31Ah, your ten minutes is almost up.
00:03:34Good. Hope you don't wet your pants.
00:03:36Five, four, three, two, one.
00:03:49Ellen, uh, I mean, Ms. Musk, uh, Ellen, uh, I mean, uh, I'm sorry that I, uh, sorry to frighten you.
00:03:58How's my boss bitch?
00:04:00Kickin' ass, girlfriend.
00:04:02So how do you, like...
00:04:05She's my boss.
00:04:07Eh, I prefer business partner or best friend.
00:04:12No way.
00:04:16Well?
00:04:20No. No!
00:04:22No, no, I'm sorry for offending your boss. No, I won't do it again.
00:04:28Alright, that's enough. We're not tyrants here.
00:04:37Sir, I found Angela Lockhart.
00:04:41You mean Angela Lockhart. My honorary bride.
00:04:47You made me lose one million dollars in just one game of poker.
00:04:51Who are you?
00:04:55Who is she?
00:04:57Atlanta. And you were right. It was secretly her propping up Ellen Musk.
00:05:01My clever bride. I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:05:05My clever bride. I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:05:13Max, prep the jet. I'm heading to Atlanta.
00:05:21Dr. Wilson, Devin Sterling's on the move. He's headed to Atlanta.
00:05:25Atlanta? The game is afoot. I'm going.
00:05:28Wait, Dr. Wilson, the Prince of Bhutan needs your medical attention.
00:05:31He can wait. I need to pick up my bride.
00:05:36Dr. Wilson!
00:05:43General Eisenhower reporting, sir!
00:05:46Devin Sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta.
00:05:49Atlanta!
00:05:51Where is that?
00:05:53Whatever! Prepare my war plate!
00:05:55Don't you run after my fiancée.
00:05:58This is war.
00:06:00No!
00:06:16I've secretly allowed your husband, Jared Cooper, to win the bid on the Maple Plaza project, like you asked me to.
00:06:22Thank you so much, Ellen. This is going to be the best anniversary gift ever.
00:06:27That project is worth billions. He can finally take his company public.
00:06:31But, Angela, my boss, I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity.
00:06:41Without your backing, no offense, but he's nothing without you.
00:06:46Well, three years ago...
00:06:58You saved me.
00:07:04He saved me, and I fell in love with him instantly.
00:07:08I didn't want to reveal my true identity because I didn't want him to feel the pressure of being with a billionaire heiress.
00:07:15But now, with this...
00:07:17So that's why you have me secretly helping him.
00:07:20I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out.
00:07:25But why work at the flea market?
00:07:27Are you... disguising yourself to test him?
00:07:31No, I'm not.
00:07:33I'm not.
00:07:35I'm not.
00:07:37I'm not.
00:07:39I'm not.
00:07:41I'm not.
00:07:43I'm not.
00:07:45You're not disguising yourself to test him?
00:07:47Well, these exotic spices are incredibly rare and cost a fortune to find.
00:07:52Plus, I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom.
00:07:56You seem happy being a housewife.
00:08:02Where the hell are you?
00:08:04Don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again.
00:08:07Get home, stat.
00:08:09It's a big day today.
00:08:11That was...
00:08:13My mother-in-law, Carol.
00:08:15She judges me because she thinks I come from a lower-class family.
00:08:18But she's going to be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am.
00:08:24You know, she even remembered our 30-year anniversary.
00:08:32Please spend more time with my son.
00:08:36Hi, I'm home.
00:08:38I have a big announcement I have to make.
00:08:41Finally, you're back. Now sign the divorce papers.
00:08:47Divorce papers?
00:08:50Is this some sort of misunderstanding, Mom?
00:08:53God, don't call me Mom again.
00:08:56We're ending that relationship.
00:08:58Just look at you. Dirt all over.
00:09:01You're selling the title of Mrs. Cooper.
00:09:04You don't deserve my son. You're way below his league.
00:09:08I'm below his league?
00:09:10That's right. You are.
00:09:13Jared is signing a $100 billion contract tomorrow with THE Ellen Musk.
00:09:19And then his company's going public.
00:09:21That's how much he's accomplished in three years.
00:09:24But you? You're still just a stinky, hippie peddler.
00:09:30Jared's like the king in the clouds.
00:09:32And you...
00:09:34You will always just be a pawn.
00:09:37Like dirt on our shoes.
00:09:42Dirt on your shoes?
00:09:44But Ellen Musk works for me.
00:09:47You're delusional. You will never upgrade to a queen.
00:09:51How dare you compare yourself to the real deal here?
00:09:57Resorting to lies. Definitely not good enough for Jared.
00:10:02And who are you to come into my house and meddle with my family matters?
00:10:09You're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife.
00:10:14Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee.
00:10:17Not a lowlife dirtbag.
00:10:19Enough!
00:10:21Jared, I knew you wouldn't divorce me.
00:10:25But I am.
00:10:28Don't fight it, Angela.
00:10:30Here's 500K.
00:10:32You'll never make this much as a hippie peddler selling spices.
00:10:36Now sign the papers, take a check, and leave.
00:10:39Don't embarrass yourself further.
00:10:43I've done so much for you these past three years.
00:10:47Did that not mean anything to you?
00:10:50Didn't expect you to be so greedy.
00:10:53Fine. Here's another 200,000.
00:10:57500,000 is too much for her already.
00:11:00She's done nothing.
00:11:02Hasn't even contributed a grandchild.
00:11:05She just sells cheap grass all day.
00:11:07Is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:11:11I took care of both of you these past three years.
00:11:16You think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something?
00:11:20And she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench.
00:11:24A hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO?
00:11:28What a joke.
00:11:30If you actually love my son,
00:11:32you'll sign the damn divorce papers already.
00:11:35And leave!
00:11:38You really think that Jared would have gotten that Maple Plaza bid without me?
00:11:43Let alone taking the company public?
00:11:45I did everything for you, Jared.
00:11:49Now you take credit for my son's success?
00:11:55It's all my work!
00:12:00Baby, we're going to be late for the auction
00:12:04if we keep letting this psycho stall us.
00:12:08You did say you would win me Princess Diana's tiara, didn't you?
00:12:13So, she's the reason for the divorce.
00:12:17She's worth more than you, Angela.
00:12:21Fine. I'll sign it.
00:12:25But don't regret it.
00:12:28Regret?
00:12:30Do we know who I am?
00:12:32Yeah, that cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:12:36I'm Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
00:12:40Jared winning the bid on Maple Plaza was because of my dad.
00:12:45Because he's business partners with Ellen Musk.
00:12:49It's part of the power I have as an elite.
00:12:54You can't do shit because you're poor.
00:12:58Social stratum matters.
00:13:00Yeah, social stratum does matter.
00:13:04And the Coopers are beneath me.
00:13:07And you really think Ellen Musk would come to Atlanta if it weren't for me?
00:13:12Ha! You're delusional.
00:13:15Now sign the papers and scram!
00:13:19Ah!
00:13:21You owe me.
00:13:23You dirty bitch. You sicken me.
00:13:25Ah!
00:13:32You hit me.
00:13:36Now sign the papers, take your check, and get the fuck out!
00:13:49I don't need your penny money.
00:13:53We're finished.
00:13:55You don't want the money? That's your loss.
00:13:58Your check is just pennies to me.
00:14:01But I would like my ring back.
00:14:06Have fun on your economy flight
00:14:09while I catch a ride on my private helicopter out of here.
00:14:16And I'm way out of your league.
00:14:20Isn't that the Winston Blue Diamond Ring?
00:14:24It's worth tens of millions of dollars.
00:14:28Oh, it's probably just cheap glass.
00:14:31Something she found at the flea market.
00:14:34You're right. She's got a lot of money.
00:14:37She's got a lot of money.
00:14:39She's got a lot of money.
00:14:41She's got a lot of money.
00:14:43She's got a lot of money.
00:14:45She's got a lot of money.
00:14:47Something she found at the flea market.
00:14:49You're right. She could never afford anything so expensive.
00:14:55Congrats, Jared Boo Boo, on getting rid of that dirt bag.
00:15:00Oh! My dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon at tomorrow's summit.
00:15:07Bigger big shot than Elon Musk?
00:15:10Yeah. And nobody's met them, but I can introduce you.
00:15:15Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:15:33Angela, Mr. Vanderbilt, the richest man in Georgia, wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding.
00:15:38Vanderbilt?
00:15:39Yeah, he's actually CEO of one of our companies. Basically our employee.
00:15:43Okay, I'll meet him at the summit tomorrow. It's fine.
00:15:46You're still going to the summit tomorrow? But you and Jared Cooper are already divorced.
00:15:50That's exactly why I'm going.
00:16:14Angela Lockhart. I finally found you.
00:16:19Who is he?
00:16:21That? That's Devin Sterling.
00:16:24He's number one on Forbes' 30 under 30 list, an early investor of crypto, CEO of Sterling Enterprises.
00:16:30Rumor has it he's worth trillions.
00:16:33And he's your fiancé.
00:16:36What? My fiancé?
00:16:40The one and only.
00:16:43So, after running away and leaving me single for three years, have you figured out how you're going to make it up to me yet, babe?
00:17:00That tiara looks perfect on you.
00:17:06What is she doing here?
00:17:10You skank. My son just divorced you yesterday and you're already hooking up with another man?
00:17:17Divorced?
00:17:19That's right. So, I guess this was never meant to be, Mr...
00:17:25Sterling. Devin Sterling.
00:17:29So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:17:33Guess she's not just a forsaken woman. She's also a stinky, penniless whore.
00:17:41How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:17:44Who the fuck are you, bitch?
00:17:47Do you know who I am?
00:17:50They don't know who you are.
00:17:53You hide it well.
00:17:55X-Team! Teach these fools a lesson.
00:18:00Teach these fools a lesson.
00:18:06Sir, you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta and then to New York. You forgot to bring the security team.
00:18:18Mind if I borrow your men?
00:18:21Go ahead.
00:18:25Toss these ill-mannered hips out.
00:18:27Oh, you bitch. I'll have my son teach you a real lesson.
00:18:37A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:18:41No.
00:18:44Uh, guest list is very distinguished tonight.
00:18:48You've got Bill Ford, Harvey Buffett, old money like me.
00:18:53Gentlemen, Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper.
00:18:56Pleased to meet you all. Your families all started empires after the Industrial Revolution. What an honor.
00:19:02I heard you secured the Maple Plaza project. It's worth billions of dollars.
00:19:07Congrats. You owe me nothing.
00:19:10It's worth billions of dollars. Congrats. You owe me nothing.
00:19:14Thank you. But we haven't received the contract yet. We deserve it.
00:19:18Oh, that's nothing. I introduced this kid to Ellen Musk.
00:19:21Vanderbilts and Miss Musk have always had a good relationship.
00:19:24So, I thought I'd help the kid out, pull a few strings.
00:19:28Thank you, Mr. Manville.
00:19:30Now, we just have to impress Miss Musk's special guest of honor.
00:19:34Yes. I heard they're a very important and powerful guest.
00:19:38Even wealthier than Ellen Musk.
00:19:41Now, if we can just secure a position with this big shot, we can feast for generations.
00:19:50I'll do my best.
00:19:56Excuse me.
00:19:57A second, gentlemen.
00:19:59What if it's the Prince of Bhutan?
00:20:04How did a hobo like you sneak in here?
00:20:07Me? A hobo? How did a cheating scumbag like you sneak in here?
00:20:12You sleep your way in?
00:20:13I told you, Angela Lockhart, don't bother stalking me.
00:20:16Nothing will come of it, and it only sickens me further.
00:20:19Don't flatter yourself.
00:20:24This is your ex-husband?
00:20:28What, were you blindfolded when you married him?
00:20:31What the hell is this? You were cheating on me?
00:20:45Son, you have to avenge me and Kaylee.
00:20:49That wicked ex-wife of yours hired some thugs and a gigolo to beat us up.
00:20:54They even took Kaylee's tiara.
00:21:02You dare hurt my mom and Kaylee?
00:21:07Get your hands off of her!
00:21:13My lady.
00:21:32My queen.
00:21:43It's... It's him!
00:21:46He scammed a million dollars off me in a game of poker yesterday.
00:21:50Who are these peasants?
00:21:52These seats are reserved for the Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:21:56Oh, shut up.
00:21:58You're disturbing the peace.
00:22:02Fuckers, you know who that is?
00:22:04That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:22:06You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:22:09His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:22:13This civil war would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:22:17Vanderbilt.
00:22:19The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt,
00:22:23The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt,
00:22:28who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:22:32That lonely Vanderbilt family?
00:22:41Oh, goddammit.
00:22:43A stomachache now?
00:22:48Whatever. Angela can handle herself. She'll be fine.
00:22:53She'll be fine.
00:23:04How dare you call one of us low?
00:23:07I'm Harvey F. N. Buffett,
00:23:09the most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:23:12I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:23:17And I can wipe you out with just a strand of my hair.
00:23:21Not with me around.
00:23:23I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen.
00:23:28You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:23:32You're fucking delusional, Angela.
00:23:35We've had enough of your games.
00:23:37Security! Break their limbs and toss them out.
00:23:41Looks like the old guard is teaming up against you.
00:23:44But don't worry. You got new money here.
00:23:49I can handle myself, thank you.
00:23:51Yes, my queen.
00:23:53You're all despicable.
00:23:56An insult to your family names.
00:24:01Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:24:05Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:24:08Cut off all business ties.
00:24:10And if you don't,
00:24:13I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:24:18Ha! I knew it!
00:24:20You're here to fuck with me.
00:24:22You can't fool anyone here.
00:24:24How much money did you spend on that get-up
00:24:26to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:24:28You're an orphan who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:24:32You have nothing, and you will always be nothing.
00:24:36She's a gold digger.
00:24:39Gold digger?
00:24:40Gigolo.
00:24:42Wanna try me for a night?
00:24:45Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:24:47Mr. Vanderbilt, we really shouldn't keep these bandits here any longer.
00:24:50They might upset Miss Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:24:53Angela Lockhart is my spurned ex-wife.
00:24:55She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza project.
00:24:58Oh, I'm gonna kill that sushi chef!
00:25:00Security!
00:25:06Security!
00:25:08You all don't realize that you actually all work for me.
00:25:11And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:25:13You!
00:25:15Insolent fools.
00:25:17Let me guess.
00:25:19You're that special guest?
00:25:21I don't know.
00:25:23Throw them out!
00:25:25And not without some broken bones, too.
00:25:33Back to our Max.
00:25:38I got this.
00:25:41I got this.
00:26:06What the hell are you two doing here?
00:26:08I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:26:10No, you're supposed to make sure Miss Lockhart is okay.
00:26:13Oh my god, we're so screwed!
00:26:25Angela!
00:26:27Don't hurt her!
00:26:29You bitch. I've always been sick of you.
00:26:31You just threw yourself at me.
00:26:33How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:26:35Boss?
00:26:36Did she say her boss?
00:26:38Miss Musk?
00:26:40That's Ellen Musk?
00:26:42That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:26:44My boss and sole heiress to the Henry Lockhart's fortune.
00:26:47Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:26:50Past the American Revolution?
00:26:52Back to the Renaissance.
00:26:54If she's your boss, then that means Angela Lockhart is...
00:26:57That's Lady Lockhart to you.
00:26:59She's royalty.
00:27:01And since you're all subsidiaries, she's your boss's boss.
00:27:04What the hell did you do?
00:27:07Oh, your majesty.
00:27:10Welcome to the United States.
00:27:13We've always been your loyal subjects.
00:27:16Yes, your highness.
00:27:18Is it queen or prince?
00:27:20It doesn't matter.
00:27:22My queen, please forgive our insolence.
00:27:25Yes, we didn't mean to offend.
00:27:28What are you doing, idiot?
00:27:30Let go of the boss lady and beg for forgiveness.
00:27:37What rightfully belongs to you.
00:28:00She's a badass herself.
00:28:02He missed out on a good wife.
00:28:04You, you, you told me your wife was a hippie peddler.
00:28:08Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag this entire time.
00:28:11No, no, don't believe their lies.
00:28:13I worked hard for everything.
00:28:15You worked for everything?
00:28:21Hi, honey.
00:28:23So, our 30th anniversary is coming up.
00:28:26And I thought that maybe we can do something special this year.
00:28:29I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:28:31I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:28:33I have to figure out this bid for the Maple Plaza project.
00:28:36And if I get it, I can take the company public.
00:28:46You were nothing before me.
00:28:49All your achievements, all your glory.
00:28:52That's all mine.
00:28:54Including the Maple Plaza contract.
00:28:58I can take all of that away.
00:29:00Just like that.
00:29:02No, you can't take that away from me.
00:29:04That's why Elon Musk was urging us to pass on deals to this nobody.
00:29:08Oh, and this antique wedding ring.
00:29:11Yeah, I forgot to tell you.
00:29:13It was Queen Victoria's.
00:29:15And it's worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's GDP.
00:29:20Oh, no.
00:29:22I gave you back the ring?
00:29:24I divorced a royal heiress?
00:29:26No!
00:29:28No, please!
00:29:30No, please take me back, baby!
00:29:32I still love you!
00:29:37Oh, man, looks like they've started the party without us.
00:29:40No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower.
00:29:44God, these two again.
00:29:46Did he say, is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:29:49President Eisenhower's descendants.
00:29:51After General Eisenhower won World War II,
00:29:53each of his descendants have all gone on to become five-star generals.
00:29:56The highest rank in the nation's military.
00:29:58Bloody buffoons know your history.
00:30:00Sorry I'm late, babe.
00:30:01I got lost trying to find Atlanta.
00:30:03Then lost again.
00:30:04I'm on my way back.
00:30:05I'm sorry I'm late, babe.
00:30:06I got lost trying to find Atlanta.
00:30:08Then lost again.
00:30:09I'm on my way back.
00:30:10I'm sorry I'm late, babe.
00:30:12Then lost again.
00:30:13I'm on my way back to New York.
00:30:18And that there is, that is the legendary, the boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:30:24He's Dr. House's protege.
00:30:26Dr. House?
00:30:27I thought that was just a TV show.
00:30:29Oh, no, that's based on real figures.
00:30:31Yep, that's me.
00:30:32Son of James House.
00:30:34Dr. House, he's practically my uncle.
00:30:36I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him when I was just 12 years old.
00:30:40So he's been off crying himself a waterfall somewhere in the Netherlands for the last 15 months.
00:30:46And I'm late because I ran out of gum and had to make a pit stop.
00:30:53Hey, Ellen.
00:30:54Who are these weirdos and why are they here?
00:30:57Uh, they're all your fiancés.
00:31:00What?
00:31:02Fiancés?
00:31:05Plural?
00:31:06Fiancés?
00:31:07Plural?
00:31:10Watch it, nerds.
00:31:11I'm her fiancé.
00:31:12No, I'm her fiancé.
00:31:14You can both shut up.
00:31:15I'm her fiancé.
00:31:17It's you.
00:31:18It's me.
00:31:19Who the hell is he?
00:31:20I'm Spider-Man.
00:31:23How are all three of these men my fiancé?
00:31:28Your father had arranged these engagements years ago, but I didn't tell you because he decided to marry Jared Cooper at the time.
00:31:35He has three badass fiancés and she marries his dumb ass.
00:31:41Whatever.
00:31:42Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:31:48Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:31:53At your service.
00:31:55Me too.
00:32:01One down, two more to go.
00:32:03She's become queen.
00:32:04Bishop to G4.
00:32:09Ow, ow, ow, what is that?
00:32:13The most German festin' water in the Nile River.
00:32:19Rook to A8.
00:32:25Hello?
00:32:29I thought I was king.
00:32:30No, you wish.
00:32:31The king doesn't do anything, so Alan can be my king.
00:32:35Oh, fine.
00:32:40Bankrupt the Fords right this second.
00:32:47I...
00:32:49I've been bankrupt!
00:32:50No!
00:32:52Who is he?
00:32:54I've been bankrupt!
00:32:55No!
00:32:56I've been bankrupt!
00:32:57No!
00:32:58I've been bankrupt!
00:32:59No!
00:33:00I've been bankrupt!
00:33:01No!
00:33:02I told you I would remove all of you from status and power if you didn't cooperate.
00:33:07Well, guess what?
00:33:08Game over.
00:33:09Alright, boys.
00:33:10Let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:33:13Oh, that's serious business.
00:33:15I'm right with you.
00:33:18Wait for me.
00:33:19Nobody beats me to the finish line.
00:33:24Angela!
00:33:30Angela!
00:33:33You already have three fiancés?
00:33:36You can't accuse me of cheating.
00:33:38I want compensation.
00:33:43You greedy SOB.
00:33:45Who the fuck is that?
00:33:46My ex-husband.
00:33:48Wait, you were married?
00:33:50And if that's a problem for you, then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:33:55More for me?
00:33:56No, no, of course not.
00:33:57Just...
00:33:58Do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:34:00Don't steal my joke.
00:34:02I can make him disappear without a trace.
00:34:04All evidence of your past with him will be gone.
00:34:07What?
00:34:08Is there something on my face?
00:34:09Uh, yeah.
00:34:10Murderous intent.
00:34:13Let's remarry.
00:34:15Let's remarry.
00:34:17You still don't realize.
00:34:19I only fell in love with you because you saved me from drowning three years ago.
00:34:49Sir, it's an emergency.
00:34:51We need to wreck right away.
00:34:53Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:34:57Okay, I'm on my way.
00:35:01She should be okay now.
00:35:06Hey, you!
00:35:08Watch over her.
00:35:09I'll be right back.
00:35:11Oh.
00:35:18You saved me.
00:35:22Fuck.
00:35:23I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:35:27Fuck.
00:35:28I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:35:30You've cheated on me.
00:35:32You've hit me.
00:35:33And you've insulted me.
00:35:35And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:35:39I fucking hate you.
00:35:42Lady Lockhart.
00:35:44God, what now?
00:35:46Yes, we understand that you are a very busy person,
00:35:51but if you're not going to give your ex-husband the Maple Plaza project...
00:35:55How about us three?
00:35:56Yes, unlike that scumbag, we won't turn on you.
00:36:00Yeah, no.
00:36:01You're all fired for trying to throw a coup.
00:36:05This is your fault, you doofus!
00:36:07We never should have believed your bullshit!
00:36:09No, no.
00:36:12We can't lose our positions with Ellen Musk and the Lockharts.
00:36:16Our family...
00:36:18I'll get you for this!
00:36:26I never should have listened to you.
00:36:27I'm ruined because of you!
00:36:38So, what's the situation here?
00:36:41I want to marry you!
00:36:52I want to marry you!
00:36:55Listen, I only met you guys a few hours ago,
00:36:59and I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:37:02But...
00:37:03What if I told you that we've known each other for much longer than just a few hours?
00:37:08Much longer.
00:37:12Angela, your parents would like to have a video call with all of you.
00:37:21My lovely princess, how are you?
00:37:24Look, your mother and I are in Italy.
00:37:26The views here are absolutely stunning.
00:37:30Perfect for a wedding, wouldn't you say?
00:37:32I heard you finally divorced that good-for-nothing,
00:37:36blood-sucking, freeloader husband of yours.
00:37:39I can't call his name, but...
00:37:41Anyway, congratulations!
00:37:43I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from to replace him.
00:37:48You must pick one of them to marry, otherwise...
00:37:52Let me do it.
00:37:54You must choose one of them.
00:37:56Let me do it.
00:37:58You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:38:01Otherwise, we'll kill ourselves.
00:38:05Mom!
00:38:06Alright, honey, that's it.
00:38:08Bye! Bye!
00:38:14So, who are you going to choose?
00:38:18Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:38:23Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:38:29That seems greedy.
00:38:36But I can always remove the other two options.
00:38:41Hey, I may be a doctor, but I can take lives too.
00:38:45I know and have access to all the deadliest poisons in the world.
00:38:50Whoa, okay. No murder, please. I was just kidding.
00:38:56You have seven days to win her over.
00:38:58Ooh, it's like The Bachelorette.
00:39:01I know. We'll start with challenge one.
00:39:07Welcome to the show, The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
00:39:10Today, we have our first challenge.
00:39:15What is all of this, Ellen?
00:39:18You'll see.
00:39:27Oh my God! Oh my God! Cockroaches!
00:39:30All women are afraid of cockroaches
00:39:33and it is every man's job to save their beloved woman
00:39:36from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:39:38What will our three candidates do to prove their undying love
00:39:42for our single but screaming her head off heiress?
00:39:49Looks like one of our contestants has already called it quits.
00:39:53It's up to the final two.
00:40:19Crunchy.
00:40:21That is sick, Cole.
00:40:23Hey, when you're stranded in the middle of the battlefield,
00:40:26you'll be glad to see one of these around.
00:40:29There are two more left. Want to try one?
00:40:32God, no! No!
00:40:35Oh my God, save me!
00:40:37Save you? You're going to save me!
00:40:42I'm a German folk doctor.
00:40:44These hands can't get germs on them.
00:40:46They're for surgery and saving lives.
00:41:03Thank God you're here.
00:41:07Are you all right, honey?
00:41:09Angela!
00:41:13All right, you won the first challenge,
00:41:15so your reward, you get to watch over her for the night.
00:41:19Just don't cross the line, if you know what I mean.
00:41:22I'm not her scumbag husband. You have nothing to worry about.
00:41:30Honestly, even if you guys fuck,
00:41:32it's not like it's against the rules or anything.
00:41:34At least my girl can get some.
00:41:36I bet her husband has a small dick anyway.
00:41:40The cockroaches!
00:41:41They're gone, they're gone.
00:41:44There's nothing in this room except you and me, okay?
00:41:47I'm going to kill Ellen when I see her tomorrow.
00:41:54I need a drink.
00:42:03Whoa, easy! You're on an empty stomach.
00:42:06Oh, why do you care?
00:42:09I'm trying to drink away your sorrows, Angela.
00:42:14You guys were right.
00:42:16I was blind from marrying that asshole.
00:42:19You know, I wasted three whole years of my life with him.
00:42:25He never even loved me,
00:42:27and I gave up my entire career for him.
00:42:33Do you really think that you would still be number one
00:42:35on the Forbes 30 under 30 list if I was around?
00:42:39You may not be number one on Forbes list,
00:42:42but you know what you're number one in?
00:42:45What?
00:42:49You're number one here.
00:42:56You know, we've known each other kind of a long time.
00:43:00Lies.
00:43:03You all just want something from me.
00:43:07Angela, I know it's hard to trust again,
00:43:12but I assure you, I don't care what family you're from.
00:43:18I'm the richest man in the nation.
00:43:20I don't need your power, your status,
00:43:24your wealth, your connections.
00:43:27I just need you.
00:43:30I'll prove my love to you within six days.
00:43:32I promise.
00:43:45Screw the contest.
00:43:47I just want love.
00:43:50Angela, you're drunk.
00:43:53I'm going to dump you.
00:43:55I'm going to dump you.
00:43:58You're drunk.
00:43:59I'm an adult. Can't I go just get what she wants?
00:44:03It's okay.
00:44:08But love and sex aren't exactly the same thing.
00:44:12Well, they're not mutually exclusive either.
00:44:17This is what you want.
00:44:48Nine-inch penis.
00:44:50Morning to you too.
00:44:52You sure you were drunk last night?
00:44:54A girl remembers when she's had a nine-inch penis inside of her.
00:45:00Well, glad you enjoyed it.
00:45:03But don't tell Shane or Cole.
00:45:06Because then they would...
00:45:08Say that you were being unfair?
00:45:10Technically, us having sex is a break-in.
00:45:13I won the first challenge.
00:45:15And according to Ellen,
00:45:17my prize was to spend the night with you anyway.
00:45:20Don't make this any harder than it already is.
00:45:26You sure you don't want it pretty hard?
00:45:30Stop.
00:45:33Fine, fine, fine.
00:45:37I won't tell.
00:45:39Fine, fine.
00:45:42I won't tell.
00:45:45But only on one condition.
00:45:49I won't tell.
00:45:51But only on one condition.
00:45:54You have to go out on a date with me.
00:45:57Fine.
00:46:01I've had a crush on you since college, Angela.
00:46:05You never noticed me.
00:46:10You should get dressed and get out of here before anyone sees you.
00:46:16It's only 7am. She's still sleeping.
00:46:18I'm not sleeping alone.
00:46:20Yeah, I'm not letting my fiancé be alone with another man for another second.
00:46:26Morning, gentlemen. Or shall I say ruffmen?
00:46:29Oh, don't mind him.
00:46:32What's up, guys?
00:46:34We're ready for the second challenge.
00:46:36No cockroaches this time.
00:46:38Yes, no more terrifying things. That was my bad, Angela.
00:46:41This better be a good challenge, Ellen.
00:46:43I'm sure you'll all enjoy this one.
00:46:45The second challenge is...
00:46:48The second challenge is...
00:46:50A date.
00:46:51Lane, I should have asked for something else.
00:46:53A date? That's it.
00:46:56What's the catch?
00:46:57No catch. Just who Ms. Lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most.
00:47:01As simple as that.
00:47:02I know what I want to do. Let's start with me first.
00:47:04Okay, who's up first? Ben?
00:47:06Me.
00:47:07Saved the best for last.
00:47:09Ain't that right, Angela?
00:47:11Then it's decided.
00:47:15Please, don't take my BMW away!
00:47:19Too bad. You pissed off the Lockharts.
00:47:22I have nothing left!
00:47:32That bitch will ruin me!
00:47:37It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:47:48General Eisenhower, sir!
00:47:50At ease, Lieutenant! This is my lieutenant.
00:47:53He also manages this boxing gym.
00:47:55Pleasure to meet you, Madam Eisenhower!
00:47:57He's so serious. But hang on.
00:48:00Lieutenant, I don't know who I'm going to marry yet!
00:48:03Baby! I decided to take you here on our first date so that I can introduce you to my guns!
00:48:08Guns? Like murder weapons?
00:48:11Yes. Murder weapons.
00:48:33You're like my guns, babe.
00:48:35Pretty Lockhart.
00:48:37Yeah.
00:48:38Let me show you what I can do with them.
00:48:40Lieutenant! Come close!
00:48:43Wait! You're just going to hit him like that? He's not even going to fight back?
00:48:47Fighting back would be treason, ma'am!
00:48:49Treason? You guys are way too serious.
00:48:53Look, you Lockhart bitch! I caught you!
00:48:55If I'm going down, you're all going down with me!
00:48:58Lieutenant! Pistol attack!
00:49:04Ah!
00:49:08You dare try to hurt my wife?
00:49:12I will make you pay!
00:49:16If you don't need to keep beating him up, we could just take him to the cops.
00:49:19Not when he tries to hurt you!
00:49:27So he's a bit violent.
00:49:30Some might call it being protective.
00:49:32Poor anger issues.
00:49:34What if we get married and I forget to use a coaster on an antique table or something?
00:49:38Is he going to be, like, rough?
00:49:41Hey, some girls are into that.
00:49:43I don't know if I am.
00:49:46Well, maybe shame will be your type.
00:49:51Your date with Shane starts now.
00:50:00Hey.
00:50:02Hey.
00:50:04Cool ride.
00:50:06A gift from the Chancellor of Germany when I saved his wife.
00:50:09Impressive.
00:50:13Your breath smells like peppermint.
00:50:16Refreshing.
00:50:18I got cool mint, too.
00:50:20Or do you prefer spearmint?
00:50:23What do you not have in this coat of yours?
00:50:26Fruit flavored gum. I can't stand those.
00:50:28So, where are you taking me, Shane?
00:50:30Let me show you.
00:50:38Dr. Wilson!
00:50:40Our VIP of VIPs!
00:50:42Right this way.
00:50:44VIP of VIPs?
00:50:45Ah, just some other guy I saved. I forget who.
00:50:48You saved a lot of people.
00:50:50I do what I can.
00:50:53Oh my gosh!
00:50:55It's my gold digging neighbor who just got dumped by her husband.
00:51:00Sandra Miller, what are you doing here?
00:51:02I just thought this was for the VIP of VIPs.
00:51:05Your mother-in-law told me all about the divorce
00:51:07and how you hired some gigolo to beat her and Kaylee Vanderbilt up.
00:51:13Hello of you.
00:51:15What are you doing here, Sandra?
00:51:17Of course your bird brain wouldn't remember.
00:51:19I sell high fashion jewelry pieces so high end,
00:51:22you couldn't even afford even a few soldier organs.
00:51:25The auction begins.
00:51:27I'll deal with you later.
00:51:30Here, I'll just be one second.
00:51:36Cameron, I have a task for you.
00:51:42Our next piece is absolutely extraordinary.
00:51:45Cleopatra's armband.
00:51:47Sold by our vendor, Sandra Miller.
00:51:51For five million dollars.
00:51:54Excuse me.
00:51:56I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:51:58It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:52:01I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:52:03It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:52:05What are you doing?
00:52:07Just watch.
00:52:09Come on.
00:52:14That is Queen Victoria's ring?
00:52:16Please, I'm an expert and that's a fake.
00:52:19She probably got it at the flea market she works at.
00:52:22You work at a flea market?
00:52:24Not this again.
00:52:25Cut the bullshit, that wouldn't even sell for five dollars.
00:52:28Oh yeah?
00:52:29Here, you want it? For free.
00:52:31Ew, I don't want that trash from a stinky hippie peddler.
00:52:36Well, that's too bad then, because you are the fraud.
00:52:42What are you talking about?
00:52:43Who the hell are you to accuse me?
00:52:45Throw them out.
00:52:47Dr. Wilson, I know you're a legend in medicine, but we're professionals.
00:52:52Oh yeah?
00:52:53And that armband sells for five million dollars?
00:52:57Yeah.
00:52:58Mine is the real thing.
00:52:59You two are just upset because you're too poor to afford our luxury items.
00:53:04Oh, is that so?
00:53:06When a so-called expert failed to recognize Queen Victoria's ring then?
00:53:10Dear Lord.
00:53:12This is real.
00:53:14It's authentic.
00:53:16It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:53:21Cameron, what have you found?
00:53:24Yeah, that picture of Cleopatra's armband you sent me?
00:53:27It's a replica.
00:53:30I had the same one right here at the flea market.
00:53:32So, you are the fraud.
00:53:37You just went to the flea market so you can buy some fakes.
00:53:40And Cameron, how much are these fakes being sold for?
00:53:43One fifty.
00:53:45Wow.
00:53:46Not even five dollars.
00:53:48Sandra.
00:53:49You've been duping us the whole time?
00:53:52Arrest her!
00:53:54No!
00:53:55Please!
00:53:56Just this one time!
00:53:57Please!
00:53:58What's going on, Dr. Wilson?
00:54:01Uh, investigating lead poisoning from cheap jewelry for the Emperor of Japan.
00:54:05Bye.
00:54:06Blacklist her from the jewelry industry forever.
00:54:16I had a really great time tonight.
00:54:19Me too.
00:54:20May I have a kiss?
00:54:38Something wrong?
00:54:39Do you always have gum in your mouth?
00:54:46Yep.
00:54:47You never have to worry about stinky breath from me.
00:55:00You owe us a bunch of money, Cooper.
00:55:04I don't have any money.
00:55:06How did you pay for this hotel then?
00:55:09I guess you'll only pay up if I break your other leg.
00:55:16Stop!
00:55:20Mr. Vandervilt.
00:55:24Mr. Buffett.
00:55:29This is the contract for the Maple Plaza project.
00:55:32That's right.
00:55:33Miss Musk wanted me to give it to you.
00:55:36I knew Angela was still in love with me.
00:55:39I knew Angela was still in love with me.
00:55:41No, no.
00:55:42Sorry about those injuries from earlier.
00:55:44It was all just a little misunderstanding.
00:55:47Yeah, we could be partners again.
00:55:51And then maybe you can tell Lady Lockhart to put in a good word for us?
00:55:56Angela still loves me.
00:55:58She's just throwing a fit.
00:55:59She'll be back to me soon enough.
00:56:01Yeah.
00:56:02Do you need any help winning her back?
00:56:04We can give you jewelry to give to her.
00:56:07I was just sucking up to these pricks a few days ago,
00:56:09and now they're all begging me to help them out.
00:56:12It feels so damn good to be in power.
00:56:15Sure.
00:56:17I'll put in a good word for you.
00:56:19I just need...
00:56:20Anything.
00:56:21You tell us, we'll give you anything.
00:56:23Once I take everything from these idiots,
00:56:26I'll go after Angela Lockhart for my revenge.
00:56:35I'm giving the contract to Jared Cooper, just like you asked me to.
00:56:38Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:56:43Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:56:45I don't get it, Ms. Musk.
00:56:47That contract has a preliminary clause.
00:56:49It requires him to pay 50% of the costs up front as a deposit.
00:56:53And if he can't, then what?
00:56:55He'll be bankrupt.
00:56:56So as long as he's greedy, I have to take it.
00:57:00I'm avenging my best friend.
00:57:02I want to show the world that without Angela Lockhart, he's nothing.
00:57:12I signed the Maple Plaza project.
00:57:15We should celebrate.
00:57:16You did?
00:57:17You see, I know my son has it in him.
00:57:20That skank Angela is nothing next to you.
00:57:23And it's all thanks to you, sweetheart.
00:57:26Actually, it's thanks to Angela.
00:57:29Angela.
00:57:32What?
00:57:34You're trying to ditch me to go back to your wife?
00:57:36Oh, no, no, no, no. He's not.
00:57:38Jared, what are you doing?
00:57:40You have such a beautiful and bright future ahead of you.
00:57:44It's my decision, Mom.
00:57:46I'm the head of the house here.
00:57:48I'm telling my dad.
00:57:50Fine. Go right ahead. He has enough problems himself.
00:57:52If you're obedient, I'll keep you around as his side piece.
00:57:55But if not, you can scram.
00:57:58Dad, Jared is being mean to me.
00:58:01Teach him a lesson.
00:58:02Kaylee, be a good girl, okay?
00:58:04Jared has the backing of some very powerful people now.
00:58:08Don't get on his bad side.
00:58:10We can't afford to piss him off.
00:58:12So do as he says.
00:58:14But Dad...
00:58:22I'm sorry.
00:58:24Be your side piece.
00:58:26Very good.
00:58:27I'm happy you've come around.
00:58:29Now let's go celebrate.
00:58:34I mean, do I really want to be with Mr. Minty Mouth forever, though?
00:58:38But that tongue action, though.
00:58:40Tongue is important.
00:58:42In more than just one spot.
00:58:43Ellen, we aren't in public.
00:58:45That's true.
00:58:47Stomach ache.
00:58:48Again?
00:58:49I have to run to the bathroom.
00:58:50Devin should be here to pick you up soon.
00:58:52Okay.
00:58:54Devin's late.
00:58:56Not a good sign for a date.
00:59:00This hotel restaurant has five Michelin stars.
00:59:05It's her.
00:59:06And she's alone.
00:59:07With no one to save her.
00:59:11You whore.
00:59:12You seduced my son so he'd get back with you.
00:59:18Let me tell you.
00:59:20I would never go back even if your entire family got down on their knees and begged me.
00:59:27Hey, you guys can fight all you want.
00:59:29But you need to take this somewhere else.
00:59:31Whoever gets rid of her for me gets all this.
00:59:34What?
00:59:35Why do I have to leave?
00:59:36She's the one starting shit.
00:59:37Because I have money and you don't.
00:59:40You're just a stinky hippie peddler.
00:59:42And my son just signed a 100 billion dollar contract.
00:59:46He still got the contract?
00:59:48Hmm.
00:59:49Must be Ellen's doing.
00:59:51Even if he does sign it, he doesn't have the liquidity to pay the deposit up front.
00:59:55Oh, he's just gonna...
00:59:57Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
01:00:01Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
01:00:06You take my charity and toss it in my face as if it's your own.
01:00:11My maid wouldn't even pick up such a pitiful amount.
01:00:14$1,000 to take her away.
01:00:17$2,000 to drag her away.
01:00:20$5,000 to beat her away.
01:00:26Oh, hey!
01:00:28Hey!
01:00:29Ow!
01:00:32You okay?
01:00:33Are you hurt?
01:00:38Weakling.
01:00:39You!
01:00:40You!
01:00:41Just a few days ago you found yourself a boy toy right after getting divorced.
01:00:45And now you have two more?
01:00:47What a whore.
01:00:48What a whore.
01:00:49Yeah.
01:00:50And Jared wanted to get back with her?
01:00:52What if she has an STD?
01:00:55Oh, like sleeping with a married man wouldn't give you an STD.
01:00:59Let's go.
01:01:00We'll expose her to Jared.
01:01:02Hang on.
01:01:04What do you want?
01:01:05I'll scream!
01:01:07I don't hit women.
01:01:08But I never said I don't kill women.
01:01:12But I never said I don't kill women.
01:01:16Oh, God.
01:01:17He is a murderer.
01:01:18What if he murders me?
01:01:19Not him.
01:01:20Definitely not him.
01:01:25We're not afraid of you.
01:01:28That's enough.
01:01:29This isn't a war zone.
01:01:30You'll be removed from being a five-star general if you hurt a civilian without adequate cause.
01:01:35I was just messing with him.
01:01:37Was he, though?
01:01:38We're not afraid of you.
01:01:41Jared!
01:01:42You have to avenge us.
01:01:43Look at this slut.
01:01:44She's found two more boy toys.
01:01:46She's cheating on you.
01:01:47Don't get back with her.
01:01:48Oh, Mr. Cooper, it's you.
01:01:50I apologize for this scene.
01:01:52I'll toss out the potty crashes immediately so that you can go to your salvation banquet.
01:01:56Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:01:58Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:02:00The potty crashes.
01:02:04Oh!
01:02:05You have any idea who that is?
01:02:06That's my wife.
01:02:08You saved that title for the real skank over there.
01:02:11That's right.
01:02:12Know your place.
01:02:13Shut up.
01:02:14She's cheating on you.
01:02:18Know your place.
01:02:19You're just a side piece.
01:02:20If I still want you, that is.
01:02:21Eric, have you gone mad?
01:02:23This is Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
01:02:26You slap her for this whore?
01:02:28Mom!
01:02:29They really think they're something, huh?
01:02:31Angela's an heiress to a family whose wealth and status goes back to the Victorian age.
01:02:35She's richer even than Ellen Musk.
01:02:38I only got the Maple Closet Project because she gave it to me.
01:02:42What?
01:02:44You apologize right now or I will kick you and your father to the curb.
01:02:51I...
01:02:54I...
01:02:55I'm sorry.
01:02:57No.
01:02:58This can't be.
01:03:00I made you divorce...
01:03:05Go home.
01:03:07You're not suited to come with me to my celebration banquet.
01:03:15I apologize on behalf of my mother.
01:03:18Honey, I know you came here to celebrate my achievements.
01:03:21I promise no one will bother you anymore.
01:03:24I didn't come here for you.
01:03:27I'm on a date.
01:03:29A date with two men at the same time?
01:03:32She really is a whore.
01:03:34Angela, please forgive me.
01:03:36I really do love you.
01:03:40Oh-ho! Lady Knockout is here!
01:03:44Oh-ho! Lady Knockout is here!
01:03:48Yeah, we already know you beat Ford to effort.
01:03:51We're too old for that.
01:03:53They're here for my celebration banquet.
01:03:55Please, you gave me the contract so if anyone should go as my guest of honor, it should be you.
01:04:01Oh, yes, please, Miss Lockhart, join us.
01:04:03We'll all be one happy business family again.
01:04:07What the hell are you all doing here?
01:04:09Where were you?
01:04:11Stomach issues.
01:04:13Again?
01:04:14Would you like my diagnosis?
01:04:16No.
01:04:18Let me make myself clear, okay?
01:04:22I would rather die than be with you again.
01:04:26Seems that they're not actually on good terms.
01:04:30I can't lose face in front of these pricks.
01:04:32Otherwise, they'll cut me off, too.
01:04:34Angela, I know you're still mad, but please give me a chance.
01:04:36I'll prove it to you.
01:04:38You want a chance?
01:04:40Angela, no.
01:04:41You have three great guys here who all want to marry you.
01:04:44Don't take him back.
01:04:46I'll give you two choices.
01:04:50I'll give you two choices.
01:04:54Me or the contract.
01:04:57You're kidding me.
01:04:59No, I'm not kidding you.
01:05:01If you choose me, we can remarry this week.
01:05:05But you don't get the $100 billion contract.
01:05:09The choice is all yours.
01:05:11That's a tough choice.
01:05:13You think so?
01:05:14He either marries a royal heiress or gets a contract that takes his company to the moon.
01:05:18Either way, he benefits.
01:05:20Why can't I have both?
01:05:22You really are a greedy bastard.
01:05:25Angela, I saved you in the pool, remember?
01:05:27I deserve the contract.
01:05:29Did you really?
01:05:35Look who's fashionably late now.
01:05:38He didn't save her at the pool.
01:05:40Wait, what are you talking about?
01:05:43I choose the contract.
01:05:45I knew it.
01:05:47You'll get what's coming to you.
01:05:50With this contract, my company's earning potential is limitless.
01:05:54Angela Lockhart, you humiliated me in front of everyone.
01:05:57I will get you one day.
01:05:59Let me show you something.
01:06:11You saved me.
01:06:18You saved me.
01:06:20I'm sorry if his lies led to you wasting three years of your life.
01:06:26But I promise you, I'm going to make it up to you with the rest of our lives.
01:06:32No, no, I wasn't lying.
01:06:34I just couldn't remember exactly what happened that day.
01:06:41Does that mean we both each saved her once?
01:06:48What? Me?
01:06:51Dr. Wilson losing at saving people?
01:06:54No way.
01:06:55You guys, one of you, do something life-threatening right now.
01:06:59You're crazy.
01:07:01Actually, they've all been doing horrible shit behind your back.
01:07:06What?
01:07:09Mr. Sterling had me investigate their company's dealings.
01:07:12Turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts.
01:07:16Put it simply, they've been stealing from you.
01:07:19I can't believe I didn't realize.
01:07:22Ms. Lockhart, I'm so sorry.
01:07:24I should have had third-party accountants check thoroughly.
01:07:27No, it's not your fault. They're just too slick.
01:07:30You'd like me to punish them for you.
01:07:32Oh God, no. Not that again. Please.
01:07:35Max, you know what to do.
01:07:50The banks have pulled all of our funds.
01:07:53All business ties have been severed.
01:07:55We're bankrupt!
01:08:01How did you do that?
01:08:03Who are you?
01:08:04And don't say Spider-Man!
01:08:08I'll tell you who I am.
01:08:11I'll tell you who I am.
01:08:15I am...
01:08:17Crypto Punk Number Two.
01:08:19What did he say he was?
01:08:21That's more bizarre than Spider-Man.
01:08:24You're Crypto Punk Number Two?
01:08:26Well, I'm Crypto Punk Number One.
01:08:29See? You are number one at something.
01:08:31The most expensive NFT collection in the world.
01:08:34Forget Forbes' list.
01:08:36It's all about young money now.
01:08:38So, how about our date?
01:08:46I'm not letting them one-up me on this one.
01:08:48Let's buy two.
01:09:02They forgot to cancel my contract.
01:09:05I still have the $100 billion project.
01:09:09Yes! I'm rich!
01:09:12They'll make them all pay soon!
01:09:20What?
01:09:21Mr. Cooper, sir.
01:09:22The Maple Plaza contract requires us to provide 50% of the costs up front.
01:09:27Otherwise, it's a breach of contract and we'll have to pay for all financial repercussions.
01:09:31No!
01:09:33I'm bankrupt!
01:09:36I need a little off-card.
01:09:37You tricked me!
01:09:44Oh, allow me.
01:09:48I'm sorry I was late, my queen.
01:09:50I had to get some very important materials...
01:09:54for our special date.
01:09:56Well, cheers.
01:09:58Cheers.
01:10:08This looks good.
01:10:14Did you use my spices?
01:10:16I know your ex-in-laws never appreciated you.
01:10:20You can have all the money and power in the world,
01:10:24and you still can't force a man to love you.
01:10:28I couldn't even remember our anniversary.
01:10:34Angela.
01:10:36Your future...
01:10:38with me...
01:10:40is going to be different.
01:10:42Come on.
01:10:44Upstairs.
01:10:50Come on.
01:11:04Wow.
01:11:06Devon, I can't believe this is what I've been missing out on these past few years
01:11:10just because of some silly mistake.
01:11:13Angela.
01:11:15I've known and loved you for three whole years.
01:11:18Actually...
01:11:20I've also loved you for three years.
01:11:23That's right. I fell in love with you three years ago, too.
01:11:26How is all of this possible?
01:11:29I didn't meet any of you until recently.
01:11:32Well, actually, maybe Devon, but...
01:11:37I've had a crush on you since college.
01:11:40You were my motivation to go to business school.
01:11:44Despite who you were, you never judged me for being poor.
01:11:50Are you trying to get hired at Fortune 500 in a suit like that?
01:11:58All you do is babble on and on about Internet money,
01:12:02Bitcoin, and shit like that.
01:12:06Are you trying to steal my spot?
01:12:10I'll teach you a lesson.
01:12:13Hey! Get away from him!
01:12:15Angela!
01:12:17Fancy girl. I like her.
01:12:30How is he?
01:12:32It's a rare poison made from a mixture of dried roots found in Africa.
01:12:36Astragal, saltif.
01:12:38Can it be cured?
01:12:39I actually think I know that poison.
01:12:41It sounds really scary, but its cure can actually be found in any developed country.
01:12:45Household salt.
01:12:53I like her.
01:12:56There you go.
01:13:01Oh, shoot. I'm late for swim practice.
01:13:05I like her.
01:13:10I like her.
01:13:13We have been rivals ever since.
01:13:15So that's how I, well, we all met.
01:13:20I barely remember.
01:13:22I should have never let you go to swim practice that day.
01:13:25Matthew Richards, the guy who poisoned me, attacked you out of revenge.
01:13:30You wouldn't have known.
01:13:31I did hear you dropped out and became a loan shark, though.
01:13:33That makes you feel even better.
01:13:35Yeah, I think that suits him a little better.
01:13:38Angela, your seven days is almost up.
01:13:41Now that you know they all loved and fought for you for three years,
01:13:45who will you pick?
01:13:51Who couldn't it be?
01:13:53Angela Lockhart is an heiress?
01:13:57Kaley, we've gone bankrupt.
01:14:01Bankrupt?
01:14:03The Vanderbilts have gone bankrupt?
01:14:06Well then, get out of here!
01:14:09You can't do this to me!
01:14:14Jared!
01:14:15Mom, it's me.
01:14:16What happened?
01:14:18Jared, I have carefully reconsidered.
01:14:21Angela is way better than this dimwit.
01:14:23Angela is way better than this dimwit.
01:14:25You should get back with your wife.
01:14:27We're bankrupt.
01:14:28What?
01:14:32Jared Cooper.
01:14:36We're here to repost your belongings.
01:14:39No one is going to save you now.
01:14:42What?
01:14:47What kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs?
01:14:53Who will you pick?
01:14:57I...
01:15:03I brought you fried chicken.
01:15:05Fried chicken?
01:15:06Hey, not all girls like sushi and caviar.
01:15:08Yeah, he's right. I did live in Atlanta for three months.
01:15:11Sucking up last minute!
01:15:13At least I don't speak like an AI robot.
01:15:16Hey, stop. Stop.
01:15:19Welcome back to The Bachelorette.
01:15:22I mean, the three badasses who want me.
01:15:25I mean, Angela Lockhart...
01:15:28You know what I mean.
01:15:30Today, our heiress bachelorette will choose
01:15:33which one of our three badasses will she marry.
01:15:37Will it be Shane, the doctor?
01:15:41Cole, the general?
01:15:45Or Devin, the CEO?
01:15:49Uh, looks like our bachelorette may need a little more time to decide.
01:15:54Oh, the suspense is killing me.
01:15:57But when she does, she will take this eternal rose
01:16:01made from glass imported from Venice
01:16:03and give it to our winner, Angela.
01:16:08Angela.
01:16:10Oh, I uh...
01:16:13I need more time to think.
01:16:19Uh, while our bachelorette takes a little time to decide,
01:16:23why don't we check in with each of our candidates?
01:16:26Let's check in with each of our candidates.
01:16:29Let's start with Cole.
01:16:31Cole.
01:16:36There's not much to say.
01:16:38Who wouldn't want a five-star general
01:16:40who has huge biceps,
01:16:42a massive chest,
01:16:45who would protect a wife?
01:16:49Okay, thank you.
01:16:51Uh, Shane?
01:16:54Muscles, money,
01:16:57they'll only get you so far.
01:16:59But you need a well-balanced man like me
01:17:01that has more than one way to keep a lady happy,
01:17:04if you know what I mean.
01:17:08Okay, I think we do.
01:17:10And Devin?
01:17:13That was quite disgusting.
01:17:17I just hope Angela's okay.
01:17:19I know she's going under a lot of stress right now,
01:17:22a lot of choices to make.
01:17:24And she's my queen.
01:17:26I just really hope she's okay.
01:17:28And then one more thing.
01:17:30What kind of a doctor
01:17:32brings fried chicken to a girl?
01:17:35That's a good point.
01:17:36It's bad for her heart.
01:17:39And then you!
01:17:40What?
01:17:41You know what they say about military men?
01:17:44They beat their wives.
01:17:50Enough!
01:17:52Stand up!
01:17:55Hey, you guys.
01:17:57Whoa, break it up!
01:17:59Hey!
01:18:00Break it up!
01:18:05Cut to commercial!
01:18:07Cut to commercial!
01:18:11Cut to commercial!
01:18:15Cut to commercial!
01:18:26This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make
01:18:28in my entire life.
01:18:31Who do I choose?
01:18:34Sigh.
01:18:40Angela's marrying me!
01:18:41You're not stealing her from me.
01:18:43Oh yeah?
01:18:44I may be a doctor,
01:18:46but like I said,
01:18:47I know and possess the deadliest poisons in the world.
01:18:53What don't you have in that coat?
01:18:55Fruit flavored gum.
01:18:56I won't let you take Angela away from me.
01:18:58I'll fight you to the death.
01:19:00Don't forget about me.
01:19:02It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:19:08These stupid profile cards don't make any sense.
01:19:11They do not help.
01:19:12Who made these?
01:19:32It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:19:37I'm actually a part of the X-Men.
01:19:40And I have the power of telekinesis!
01:19:45Oh!
01:19:57We may have to work together to take him down.
01:20:10This battle within our heads is the most dangerous
01:20:12This battle within our heads is the most intense
01:20:14I've ever experienced.
01:20:16I may not be able to take them both down
01:20:18if they decide to team up.
01:20:20Hmm.
01:20:21Winter Mint or Cool Mint?
01:20:27You know,
01:20:29I've always really liked your hair.
01:20:31Really?
01:20:32I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it.
01:20:36So I appreciate that.
01:20:38Hey, hey, hey.
01:20:39And you know,
01:20:40Cool Mint.
01:20:41I've always really liked the way you talk.
01:20:44Really?
01:20:45Yeah.
01:20:49What do you got for me?
01:20:50I've always really liked the way you chew gum.
01:20:54Yeah?
01:20:55It's fresh, right?
01:20:56Yeah.
01:21:00You're actually a really good talker.
01:21:02I appreciate it.
01:21:03If you need me to look at you, I got you.
01:21:05I need you.
01:21:07Angel has been kidnapped.
01:21:09Angel has been kidnapped.
01:21:11It was Jared Cooper.
01:21:13That fucker.
01:21:15We have to find her.
01:21:16What, how?
01:21:17Her ring.
01:21:18Her dad installed a GPS tracking mechanism on her ring just in case.
01:21:21Well, let's go then.
01:21:22My phone.
01:21:23My fiancé.
01:21:24My fiancé.
01:21:31Jared.
01:21:35What am I doing here?
01:21:38You destroyed me.
01:21:41But you took everything.
01:21:44What?
01:21:45I have nothing left.
01:21:47It's not my fault you're too greedy.
01:21:50I wasn't greedy.
01:21:51You had sex with my wife.
01:21:53What?
01:21:55I'm not your wife anymore.
01:21:56Oh yeah, I know.
01:21:57You wouldn't take me back now, not unless I get you pregnant with my child.
01:22:00This is illegal.
01:22:02You wouldn't want your child to be away from its father.
01:22:04You won't have me arrested.
01:22:06But you will take me back.
01:22:10Come on, bitch.
01:22:13I'll settle you down a little.
01:22:24You will be begging me to fuck you soon.
01:22:28Hey!
01:22:30Angelo!
01:22:31Come here!
01:22:33You okay?
01:22:35It's too late!
01:22:36I drugged her.
01:22:37She'll be dead soon unless...
01:22:38Not yet.
01:22:39Have you forgotten who I am?
01:22:42He really does have everything in his coat.
01:22:44Everything except for fruit.
01:22:45Yeah, except for fruit-flavored gum.
01:22:46We get it already.
01:22:47Just save my boss!
01:22:50Here you go.
01:22:56You're all good now.
01:22:58Oh, thank God.
01:23:00But what do we do with that piece of shit?
01:23:02What?
01:23:03What are you going to do to me?
01:23:05Hey, stop!
01:23:06No!
01:23:08Enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever.
01:23:16Glad we didn't actually have that fight.
01:23:18Turns out he's the most dangerous of them all.
01:23:26So who did you pick, sweetheart?
01:23:28We've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding.
01:23:31The Prince of Bhutan.
01:23:34And remember, we will kill ourselves if you don't choose.
01:23:42Welcome back to the finale of
01:23:44The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:23:46We're down to the wire.
01:23:48Literally.
01:23:49The wedding day.
01:23:50But who's the groom?
01:23:59Welcome back to the finale of
01:24:01The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:24:03But who's the groom?
01:24:07Uh...
01:24:08Seems our heiress still hasn't decided.
01:24:12Any input from the parents?
01:24:14Maybe that will help sway our bachelorette's choice.
01:24:18Oh, this is exciting!
01:24:20Who should my daughter pick?
01:24:23Let me think.
01:24:24Let me think.
01:24:25I like the doctor.
01:24:27He's cute.
01:24:30But the general looks like a strong fellow.
01:24:35And we can't forget about Devon Sterling,
01:24:37the one who's loved her the longest.
01:24:38Isn't that right, Devon?
01:24:40Angela.
01:24:47You are all three...
01:24:49the best.
01:24:50The best.
01:24:51The best.
01:24:52The best.
01:24:53You are all three very fine gentlemen.
01:24:58And I'm really grateful for all of your love.
01:25:02But this was a really hard decision.
01:25:05And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:25:12And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:25:19I'm just kidding.
01:25:20I'm just as sick of this as you guys are.
01:25:24Each of our candidates have saved our main character.
01:25:30I mean, bachelorette, once.
01:25:32They've all proven their undying love.
01:25:35So who gets to unlock Angela Lockhart's heart?
01:25:39Literally.
01:25:41Could it be...
01:25:43the sexy and protective, general with a temper,
01:25:46Mr. Cole Eisenhower?
01:25:53Or the fun, wicked-minded, but kind of weird,
01:25:58Dr. Shane Wilson?
01:26:02And last but not least,
01:26:04could it be the richest man of them all,
01:26:07the man Angela would have married a long time ago,
01:26:10Mr. Devon Sterling?
01:26:15Gentlemen.
01:26:17It's been a pleasure getting to know you.
01:26:19It has.
01:26:20May the best man win.
01:26:22May the best man win.
01:26:25Drum roll, please.
01:26:40Seriously, Ricky?
01:26:48I choose...
01:26:52I choose...
01:27:00I need a powerful, strong man in order to feel like he can protect me.
01:27:06Who could resist those guys?
01:27:10Could I interest you in an N.F.D., Ellen?
01:27:12I'd be like a full-body checkup.
01:27:17I choose...
01:27:23I choose...
01:27:28Shane, it's you. I'm lovesick for you.
01:27:31You like that minty flavor, don't you?
01:27:33Yeah.
01:27:36It's that tongue action, ladies and gents.
01:27:39Ellen, be my new queen.
01:27:41I hope we can go together.
01:27:43Let's go, babe.
01:27:53It's always been you.
01:28:03I'll always love you.
01:28:07Let's give it up for those nine inches, everybody.
01:28:11Would you like a full-body checkup?
01:28:13Have you seen my murder weapon?
01:28:15I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:28:22AVAILABLE NOW