Sister Wives S19 Episode 6
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00Previously on Sister Wives.
00:02I don't have a relationship with Cody and Robin.
00:05I have moved on.
00:06I've been on a few dates, met some really nice guys.
00:10It's just not really like it.
00:13I did take a trip up to Utah earlier this week.
00:16I decided I was going to move forward
00:18with the official termination through the church
00:24where we had gotten married.
00:26I had moved on a long time ago, but I
00:29was afraid of what she would do if I ripped off that Band-Aid.
00:45Just hit me so hard that I just don't get
00:50to have the perfect Christmas.
00:59CHRISTMAS My Home For Once
01:23This Christmas is the first Christmas
01:25where I was just with one wife and her children.
01:28Kids are waking up.
01:29We're going to open some presents.
01:31Doing my best to engage the family, to be happy about it.
01:35Really just engage, be present right here,
01:41right now, in this moment.
01:44It wasn't my first Christmas without everybody else,
01:46but it was my first Christmas without Mary.
01:51There's so much that's unwrapped here.
01:54That's Cody.
01:55That's me.
01:58Robin likes to wrap all the presents.
02:01A lot of work, a lot of work.
02:02So we're usually up way, way late.
02:09So for Christmas this year, it's going
02:10to be Aspen and Mitch, McKelvie and Tony, and the babies,
02:14Isabel, Truly, and I. It's going to be definitely
02:16a smaller Christmas this year.
02:23Wait.
02:24No way.
02:26Guess what it is.
02:27It's a bobblehead.
02:28That is.
02:28That's hilarious.
02:29It is a bobblehead.
02:30Wait, that is so funny.
02:31It was smooth.
02:32It doesn't feel, I guess, like Christmas,
02:36because there's just, there's no chaos.
02:38I think that just getting used to being
02:40an adult without the Christmas that I grew up with is hard.
02:43The plan today is just to honestly hang out and play
02:46with the babies.
02:52So happy Christmas.
02:54I'm here at Maddie's.
02:57She does all the Christmas traditions,
02:59like they go see the lights with the kids.
03:01And I just thought it would be so much fun
03:03to be where the kids were for Christmas this year.
03:14So this year for Christmas, I came up to Salt Lake,
03:16and I'm going to spend it with my good friends, Lisa
03:20and Amber.
03:21Lisa used to babysit me when I was really young.
03:24And then, of course, I've known Amber almost her whole life.
03:29Cody and I have made the decision
03:30that we are splitting up.
03:33There's absolutely no way, shape, or form
03:36that I would choose to spend Christmas with them.
03:41Why would I do that?
03:43That makes no sense.
03:44That will never happen.
03:46Like, we're done.
03:48Like, our marriage is over.
03:50And I'm not going to just go be a third wheel.
03:55The future is so bright, I've got to wear shades.
03:59Cheers.
04:05I'd rather be somewhere that people want me, you know?
04:21It's been a very fun, relaxing, if not kind of weird, holiday.
04:25I became really, really aware, especially when it gets time
04:28to cook some of those foods that we've always
04:30had that I never participated in the making of.
04:32I'm like, oh, I had to look up a recipe,
04:34and then I had to try to remember what everybody did.
04:37So that was kind of different.
04:38But anyway, it's been a really good day so far.
04:46There's a lot of just the small things
04:48that each one of my parents brought in to the Brown family
04:52and added to the traditions of what
04:55we did around our holidays that have been are gone now.
04:58Because my family, just the dynamic looks different.
05:04Hope you like your goodies.
05:06Hope you like those goodies.
05:08The best part of Christmas for me
05:09is that the kids had a good Christmas,
05:11and they were having a good time.
05:13For my children's sake, I just need
05:15to focus on what's good today.
05:17And that's what I did.
05:19I think this will just slowly become the new norm,
05:21and that's OK.
05:25I love Christmastime.
05:27I have loved the years that we have spent together.
05:31I have loved all the memories that we've created.
05:34And people evolve.
05:37And we don't do that anymore, and that's OK.
05:40There's no way for me to know what each year is going to bring.
05:44It'll probably be something different every year.
05:47I love that.
05:56My mom had went on a couple of dates,
05:59and she didn't really talk too much about people.
06:02But she started talking a lot about this one guy
06:06that she went on a date with.
06:10I'm excited for my mom to date.
06:11She's never really dated before.
06:14She didn't really date guys before my dad.
06:17and then they got married.
06:19So this is her first experience, and it's really exciting for her.
06:22And I'm excited for her.
06:23Here you go.
06:24Oh, my gosh.
06:25Are you going to come play with Mama?
06:27What?
06:28Come play with me.
06:29There you go.
06:30I love you.
06:31Here.
06:31I've been going on dates for about six months,
06:34just not really dating one specific person,
06:38but dated different guys for, like, about six months.
06:41One guy was very religious.
06:43I don't know how we ever matched up at all.
06:47I told him that I was a polygamist,
06:49and he was like, wait, what?
06:52Definitely over.
06:53And then there was another time.
06:55It was sad.
06:57I was on a second date with a guy.
06:59We had a great time on our first date.
07:01Then our second date, we started talking about,
07:04just started sharing a little bit, just about polygamy
07:07and things like that.
07:08And he'd never heard about polygamy at all.
07:11It was over.
07:12And I was like, whoa, this is serious.
07:14This is serious to some people.
07:16I'm just about 52, and the idea of dating is so weird.
07:22Then add the fact that I was in a plural family
07:27for 30-something years.
07:29You know what I mean?
07:30Like, they may just think that that's what I'm interested in,
07:33just because that's what I've done for so long.
07:37Oh, who's that?
07:40I know Christine, like, she told me a few months ago
07:42that she had hired a matchmaker.
07:45I don't know if she's found anybody yet.
07:48If I ever meet somebody again, it
07:49will have to be organic, because I'm just not
07:51going to go into that.
07:53I just know.
07:54It's just I can't.
07:56Not interested in the dating app scene.
08:01So if her moving on means finding somebody new,
08:07like, I hope she does it.
08:09My life and Christine's life are separate and private
08:11from each other, and I would expect that she'd be dating.
08:15It's really none of my business.
08:18Baby's Mitchell.
08:21Hello.
08:22Isabelle just went to pick up Truly.
08:24When I decided to start dating, I was just nervous.
08:28But I wanted to date, and I wanted to, you know, date.
08:33And so I contacted a matchmaker.
08:36When I left Cody, I decided I wanted
08:37to find someone who was bald and had tattoos
08:40and drove a motorcycle and stuff,
08:41and just to find something so different.
08:44But really, honestly, I thought that sounded just
08:46extremely sexy.
08:47Have a seat.
08:48Yeah, yeah.
08:49You want us to talk before Truly gets here?
08:55Yes.
08:56Do you have anything you need to tell
08:57us before Truly gets here?
08:58No.
08:59Do you have anything you need to tell me
09:01before Truly gets here?
09:03Tony, do you have anything you need to tell mom
09:05before Truly gets here?
09:06No, I'm waiting for Truly to get here.
09:08What were you guys' first impressions of David?
09:10There.
09:11Oh, I like him.
09:12That was, like, the most unsmooth transition ever.
09:14That was not.
09:14What the heck?
09:15Dave is my boyfriend.
09:17I met him online.
09:18And we met in person for, like, about a month
09:23after we started talking.
09:25We met in person.
09:26And the date went great.
09:30He was just charming and kind.
09:34His eyes were amazing.
09:36And he was everything that I was looking for.
09:38And then we went on a second date.
09:41And I told him everything, blurted out everything.
09:46And he already knew about polygamy.
09:48He'd already heard about it.
09:50And I'm like, you don't want to be a polygamist, right?
09:53He's like, no.
09:54No, I'm an eyewastole, and I'm like, OK, well, that's good.
09:57So what are you guys' first impressions with David?
10:00I let him hold my kid.
10:01That says a lot.
10:02I don't let everybody hold my children.
10:03Hey, he was pretty good with the kids.
10:06Yeah?
10:07Cool.
10:07Yeah, I like how he survived.
10:11Dude, I don't know that you want to talk about that.
10:12Oh, yeah, no, because his wife died.
10:14His wife died.
10:15I know, his youngest was six.
10:16And left him with eight kids.
10:18And he didn't get addicted to gambling and drugs.
10:24And he made it.
10:25Like, he came out the other side with pretty decent kids.
10:28That's hard.
10:29He's a father of eight kids.
10:31And he has 10.
10:33He has nine.
10:34He has nine grandkids.
10:35His wife passed away 11 years ago.
10:37Hello.
10:38Hayden.
10:39Hi, buddy.
10:40How are you?
10:41I love you.
10:41I'm doing well.
10:43I'm good to see you, too.
10:44Babe, you can actually sit over there by Mitchell, too.
10:45David and I have been on many dates now.
10:47And it's only been a month.
10:49It just feels right.
10:52I'm 50.
10:53I know what I want.
10:54I know what I had before.
10:56This feels totally different.
10:57And I dated enough guys in the past year
10:59to know what I'm looking for.
11:01You have?
11:02I consider eight a lot.
11:05A lot of guys to go out with.
11:08Yeah.
11:09I don't know.
11:10Start double digits.
11:11What?
11:12You?
11:12Well, one was two dates.
11:14Only one made it to two dates besides David.
11:17I'm 50.
11:18I know what I'm looking for.
11:19Yeah.
11:20Truly, can I ask you a question and get
11:21an honest answer from you?
11:24Like a legit?
11:25I don't know.
11:25What?
11:26Like, can I get a legit, honest answer?
11:28Question.
11:29What do you think about David?
11:31He is funny, and I get along with him.
11:34Good.
11:36I like him.
11:37I'm glad you guys like him.
11:38He reminds me of Cody.
11:40Oh, God.
11:40Oh, fun.
11:42What?
11:43It's true.
11:44You got to expand on that, Tony.
11:45Well, he's like from the same generation, for sure.
11:49All those boomers thought that I have
11:51no idea what he was saying, but like.
11:52Tony, he's not a boomer.
11:54He's totally a boomer.
11:55Are you kidding?
11:55No, he's not a boomer.
11:56Bro.
11:57OK.
11:58Wait, he's 59.
12:0059?
12:01Does that make?
12:01Yeah, I know.
12:0260 years ago?
12:03That's the same as you, right, mom?
12:05No.
12:05Mom's 50.
12:06I'm 50.
12:07No, I know how old you are.
12:09I mean, it's the same generation as you.
12:11That's like Cold War stuff, man.
12:13Cold War?
12:14Tony.
12:15Oh, my word, do you know what a Cold War was?
12:17I think I'm older than you think.
12:20See, I'm not a boomer, and David's only
12:23five years older than I am.
12:25So I don't think he's a boomer.
12:26I'm not a freaking boomer.
12:28I'm not a boomer.
12:30I'm not.
12:31My mom's a boomer.
12:32Is David a boomer?
12:34Technically, he's a boomer.
12:36Am I dating a boomer?
12:38So David's a boomer, and my mom's a boomer.
12:42David is eight years older than I am.
12:45Eight.
12:46He's a boomer.
12:48All I know was like the 80s are my jam.
12:52Like, I loved the 80s.
12:54Like, I hear 80s music now, and I'm
12:56like all over that.
12:57Gen X, we're the feral generation.
13:00What a great time to be alive.
13:03You know, like, you're a teenager in the 80s.
13:05You've got music videos.
13:07You've got fashion.
13:09Just, like, there's so many amazing things happen.
13:12Duran Duran happened in the 80s.
13:18Yeah, he was 58 when we met, but then he had his birthday,
13:20so he was 59.
13:22I tease him about his age all the time, though.
13:24It's great.
13:25He'll talk about it more when he's 60.
13:28I mean, when you guys, if you guys are still dating by then.
13:30Yeah, it's a long time ago.
13:31I guarantee we will be, so.
13:33I knew after our first date that this was something that I
13:35wanted to really invest in.
13:37My kids, it's going to be too soon for them.
13:42But it's important for me to know
13:44how my kids feel about David.
13:47But however they feel is not going to end
13:50my relationship with David.
13:51We have said the magical words to each other.
13:54Who said it first?
13:55Him, of course.
13:56What?
13:57Oh, God.
13:58He said it first?
13:59He did say it first.
14:01I said it right after, though.
14:12OK, good.
14:13Isabel, I think, if you don't mind,
14:15I think that what was your initial reaction of David?
14:17How do you feel?
14:18Because I think that out of all my friends,
14:20How do you feel?
14:20Because I think that out of all my kids,
14:22you are taking it the hardest.
14:23Can we be honest about that?
14:25Wait, really?
14:25Is he?
14:26I'm not taking it hard.
14:27I said you're taking it the hardest.
14:29I'm just moving slower.
14:31I also think you're taking it the hardest.
14:33Anyways.
14:34I feel like you're more protective of me
14:36than anyone else.
14:37Maybe.
14:38As happy as I am for her, I think
14:40that there is like a strangeness in it,
14:43just because I've only known her as married to my dad.
14:45So she's divorced.
14:46She's only been divorced for a little bit.
14:48And so it's a little, I think, just strange.
14:53I thought it was fine.
14:54I thought it was fine.
14:55I do, however, think you guys are moving so, so fast.
14:57Agreed.
14:58So fast.
14:59I proposed to Tony before two months.
15:01I'm not talking about you right now.
15:02I'm talking about mom.
15:04This is all fast.
15:06It definitely is.
15:07I think it's harder for some siblings than others.
15:10If Christine's wanting to date, she
15:13should have been dating, in my mind,
15:15it's like whenever she felt like she was divorced.
15:18I agree with you.
15:19It is moving fast.
15:20I think it's also like you've never been physically
15:21affectionate with somebody before.
15:23Yeah.
15:24Because, I mean, you got dad and his other wives,
15:26and you're not going to be physically
15:27affectionate in front of them.
15:28Well, dad and I really never were that physically
15:30affectionate anyway.
15:31Yeah.
15:32How is that with you guys seeing me physically affectionate?
15:34I like it.
15:35I think it's healthy.
15:37Isabel doesn't like PDA from anybody, though.
15:39I'm super happy for you.
15:41Just in general.
15:42It's weird.
15:42It makes me uncomfortable.
15:43I'm happy for you, but I'd rather not be in the same room.
15:47So we kiss, and we hug in front of our kids.
15:49It's a whole new world for them.
15:52And David and I just don't care.
15:55And our kids are just going to have to get used to it.
15:57I mean, Cody and I were always very affectionate.
15:59I just was uncomfortable with PDA in front of everybody.
16:02Personally, I think there's a limit to PDA,
16:06whether you're a plural family or just dating, you know?
16:10Like, nobody wants to see, you know, hey, go get a room.
16:14You know what I mean?
16:16Be respectful.
16:18I hated PDA because I had four wives,
16:20and it was just always awkward, never quite right.
16:24I actually, I like doing PDA now, but Robin's very shy.
16:33So the other evening when you were over,
16:36and David was here.
16:37Oh, it's so weird.
16:38Yeah, it's really weird.
16:39It's so weird.
16:40We were just sitting there.
16:42I don't think it's weird.
16:43Yeah, my mom always wanted more physical affection from dad,
16:48and she didn't really get it.
16:50And so now she's going to have one person to herself
16:53who she can have physical affection with publicly
16:57as much as she wants.
16:59So you think this is long term?
17:00Yes, I do.
17:02He's cool.
17:03Are all his kids on board with you?
17:06Oh, yeah, big time.
17:07I got to go to work.
17:08They took us to on a date, like his kids, his oldest kid,
17:11like took us on a chocolate date.
17:12That's so cute.
17:14Yeah, that's where that chocolate bar comes from.
17:15I wanted to try that chocolate.
17:16I think Isabel's got to go to work.
17:18Yeah, I got to leave.
17:19You guys try that chocolate.
17:20Isabel, just really quick.
17:22Sorry, you can go.
17:24I just think it's OK also that you're
17:26having feelings about this.
17:28It's not like a crazy thing that you're experiencing.
17:31I think what you're doing, how fast you're going, it's OK.
17:33And I'll get used to it, and it's
17:36OK to get used to it too.
17:37But it might take me, but I'm doing fine now.
17:39OK, good.
17:40Good.
17:41Mom, acknowledging it's going fast
17:43isn't us telling you that it's bad.
17:44It's just being less observant.
17:46It's just saying, oh, this is going really fast.
17:49It's not us telling you to stop or slow down.
17:52Oh, good, because I wouldn't.
17:55It just is going fast.
17:57It's just us observing.
17:58This is arguably mom's first boyfriend ever.
18:02So I think they are moving fast, but it's also completely OK
18:09because this is a brand new experience for her at least.
18:11And that I told him, I said, there's
18:13a lot of extra kids in my life, and I
18:15want you to meet all of them, and Janelle, and everybody.
18:18And he's like, I'll meet whoever you want.
18:20The second date that we went on was the day
18:22where I told him everything.
18:24And in us talking about me being a polygamist,
18:26he's like, I've known some polygamists.
18:28Such a relief that he understood polygamy.
18:32We have said the magical words to each other,
18:35but it only took us a week.
18:36What?
18:37Oh, I was going to high five you.
18:39You said I love you within a week?
18:40Yes.
18:41It was a week in a day, just a week.
18:44Who said it first?
18:45Him, of course.
18:46What?
18:47Oh, God.
18:48He said it first?
18:49He did say it first.
18:50I said it right after, though.
18:52I want mom to be happy.
18:53I want mom to be safe.
18:55And I'm holding judgment until I meet him.
18:57But from what I've seen in her, she's happy,
18:59and I think she'll be OK.
19:01We sat down.
19:02I went through and met his family.
19:04And then we sat down off to the side,
19:06and he just pulled my chair next to him.
19:09And he just pulled me into him, and we just cuddled.
19:12And I thought, everything was crazy all around us.
19:16And I'm like, so everything's going
19:18to be crazy all around us.
19:20But right here, we're going to be calm.
19:22And I legit felt calm for the first time in my life.
19:28And I put my hand on his heart, and it was racing so fast.
19:31And my heart was racing so fast.
19:34But it was like a breath.
19:38And I just realized I loved him then.
19:41And I would do this for the rest of my life.
19:48It was the most amazing memory, experience.
19:55And then our souls just synced up,
19:57and our heartbeats synced up.
20:00And I realized I was in love with him.
20:05My whole life with Mary, she has said one thing,
20:09and I felt a vibe for another.
20:11I felt like I'd been shoveled bulls**t my whole life.
20:13Had I wanted to leave sooner, I would have left sooner.
20:18It takes a complete, like I have to,
20:21like yesterday when we were cooking and everything,
20:23it was hard for me to settle down.
20:24But now I'm like, oh, OK, this is good.
20:28This is good today.
20:29I'm here.
20:30Savannah's with me.
20:31We're always talking about where could we get property?
20:34What about the property?
20:35How do we get it?
20:37But I'm here with her.
20:40I'm here.
20:41I'm here with Savannah.
20:43And I'm here with Mary.
20:45where could we get property?
20:47What about the property in Montana?
20:49Because we loved it there.
20:50My opinion is, if we find just the plot of land,
20:54and it's just so amazing that we've got to have it,
20:58then let's buy the plot of land.
20:59I wish that land was 40 miles from here.
21:01We can start working on building the house,
21:04our house together.
21:05Maddie and Caleb and I,
21:07we realized that we both kind of want to do the same thing.
21:09I have kids who want to have a piece of property.
21:11We would never be real farmers.
21:12Like, we're never going to be real farmers.
21:14It'd be awesome, but we'll hobby farm around,
21:17and maybe we'll have some chickens and a garden,
21:21and maybe we'll grow something.
21:23I don't know.
21:28The property in Montana is exactly what you think of
21:30when you think of the West.
21:31It's sagebrush, knee-high, all over the place.
21:34There's a little creek that runs across it,
21:36which is very rare in the West.
21:38And it's just cute.
21:39It's just perfect.
21:40I talked to your dad,
21:41and I just said, I want you just to buy me out.
21:44And I think that was interesting to him,
21:48that your dad doesn't take action really fast.
21:50Like, until it's like everything's falling down,
21:54and then he finally gets like-
21:55So you probably want to make sure that you-
21:57I'm actually going to still consult a lawyer.
22:00I still have the property in Flagstaff, Coyote Pass.
22:04We're going to split it four ways.
22:07And the last I talked to Cody,
22:08he says he doesn't have his part of the money
22:11to pay off the property.
22:13I have my part, and it's just sitting there.
22:16It's really up to Mary, Robyn, Cody, and I to pay it off.
22:20Look, all of my quote-unquote retirement,
22:23all the money I've saved,
22:25is tied up right now in these properties on Coyote Pass.
22:28I have suggested to Cody that he just get a loan
22:31and finance me out, get my portion out.
22:34Because when we're pooling our efforts and our resources,
22:37then all of a sudden, every-
22:39So much more.
22:41So much more becomes possible.
22:43I'm so ready, as I'm living in this apartment in Flagstaff,
22:46I'm so ready to be somewhere
22:48that I can choose which furniture I want permanently.
22:52Like, I would love to settle somewhere.
22:54I'm so ready to settle somewhere.
22:56You know, I can remember,
22:59it was right after we'd moved to Las Vegas,
23:02and I just had this perspective change
23:04where all of a sudden I'm like, you know what?
23:06I'm not going to sit around and wait for Cody.
23:08And if I sat around and wait for him,
23:10nothing ever would happen.
23:11Nothing.
23:25I'm going over to Mary's place.
23:26We're going to talk about our divorce, our breakup.
23:28I think there's just some things we've got to clarify.
23:33My whole life with Mary,
23:35she has said one thing and I've felt a vibe for another.
23:38I'm not going to sit and accuse her of gaslighting,
23:41but I felt like I'd been shoveled bulls*** my whole life.
23:44I don't know where she's at, ever.
23:46Oh, hi. Come on in.
23:48How's it going?
23:49Good. How are you?
23:50I'm good.
23:51Good, good.
23:52A few months ago, Cody and Robin and I
23:54were out at the property.
23:56We ended up talking about our relationship.
23:59After that,
24:01I ended up moving forward and taking the steps
24:05through the church that we were married in
24:10to terminate the marriage.
24:16David and I have been dating for about a month.
24:19Hi, baby.
24:20Can I come in?
24:25Hi.
24:26I would like you to meet David.
24:28Ta-da.
24:36When I was still married to Cody,
24:38Nancy, our therapist, told me to make a list of qualities
24:42that I was looking for in a husband
24:43that was super important to me.
24:45And it was like a good communicator,
24:47someone who was going to be present in my life,
24:49someone who wanted to be around my children,
24:51someone who was attracted to me, just a list of things.
24:54And Cody wasn't any of the things on the list.
25:00I told him the list and he's like,
25:02I'm not any of those things.
25:03I said, no, you're not.
25:08David and I have been dating for about a month
25:10and he's awesome.
25:11He loves his family.
25:12Family is his most important thing to him.
25:14He's owned his own drywall business.
25:16He has a reputation of being honest and real with people.
25:22And he's really a great communicator.
25:29Hi, baby.
25:30Can I come in?
25:32Hi.
25:33I would like you to meet David.
25:34Ta-da.
25:36My boyfriend.
25:37Isn't that the dumbest word?
25:39Boyfriend?
25:40It's like we're adults, so I feel like love of my life,
25:43but that really is a lot.
25:44But this is David.
25:46I'm your burrito.
25:47Okay, that's probably inappropriate.
25:51Soulmate.
25:52He's my, yeah, definitely soulmate.
25:54He's my definite soulmate.
25:54Soulmate.
25:55Yeah, definitely soulmate.
25:56He's my soulmate.
25:57He's my soulmate.
25:58He's my soulmate.
25:59He's my soulmate.
26:00Soulmate.
26:01Yeah.
26:02Unicorn, you're my unicorn.
26:03Yeah, thanks, babe.
26:04My name is David.
26:05I am from Salt Lake.
26:08I have eight kids and my wife passed away about 12 years ago,
26:11started dating and gave up about eight years into it.
26:15And then three years afterwards,
26:17she messaged me on a date site and here we are.
26:25Third date, I was like, are you gonna friend zone me?
26:29You didn't kiss me and blah, blah, blah.
26:30Yeah, you're aggressive.
26:32Like, boom, we're on a date, wanted a kiss.
26:36Like you didn't kiss me on the second date.
26:37Or you're desperate for some affection.
26:42I was, okay.
26:44Specifically from you though, okay?
26:46Yes.
26:53The lights are pretty.
26:54They are pretty.
26:56So are you.
26:59And I'm like, well, what?
27:00I mean, you didn't kiss me on our first date.
27:01So I'm like, you know.
27:03No, first, second, no.
27:06Third date, it was a make-out session.
27:09I don't mean to go that far.
27:12You're really, really special to me.
27:17Someone told me that when I least suspect,
27:20I'll find that person and they're so right.
27:23I told you I loved you after one week.
27:25You, however, you are fast.
27:29Now, when you see something good,
27:31see how well you are with your kids.
27:33I love it.
27:35Everything about you.
27:36I like your craziness.
27:39I like everything about you.
27:40You're just, you're perfect for me.
27:43Your eyes are what got me first.
27:46I remember you saying that.
27:47Oh no.
27:48I like your eyes.
27:59What's going on with you?
28:01Oh, I'll be up in Paraguay.
28:04So you're going to move there and live there?
28:06I am now.
28:10I mean, we had that discussion
28:12about where our relationship is at.
28:14After you made it very clear that you weren't interested
28:17in working on a relationship with me.
28:21Well, don't blame me for not loving you.
28:23I was doing my best to make it up to you.
28:25I was doing my best to make it up to you.
28:27Don't blame me for not loving you.
28:28I was doing my duty.
28:30Blame yourself if I don't love you, okay?
28:32When I'm in love with a woman,
28:36that's her fault.
28:40So what happens if I'm not in love with a woman?
28:44Is that just my fault?
28:46If I'm mad about a woman, passionate,
28:49want to serve her, want to rub her feet,
28:53want to carry in her groceries,
28:56if I want to buy her jewelry,
28:57if I want her to feel special all the time,
29:00if I'm in love with a woman,
29:03I think that is her fault.
29:06I'm not placing blame.
29:08All I did was acknowledge the fact
29:09that he told me he was not interested
29:11in working on a relationship.
29:13You want me to own it that much?
29:15I'm not saying anything about owning anything.
29:17I didn't say I wasn't interested in working on it.
29:19I did say I didn't want, I could fake through it.
29:24Yeah, I'm not interested in faking a relationship.
29:26But that's not me saying I can't work on it.
29:29You're trying to make me own it.
29:31That's really not where this works.
29:31I didn't know we were having a fight here.
29:33I did not know that this was a fight conversation
29:36because I'm not open to that.
29:38It's not.
29:39I'll shut it down right now if it's a fight.
29:40It's an accountability conversation
29:43that we agreed mutually
29:45that the relationship isn't going to progress.
29:48You're right, we did.
29:49Okay.
29:54You had a part in it, I had a part in it.
29:57I took the steps and we're done.
30:00Moving on, moving forward together?
30:08There's no moving forward together.
30:09Right.
30:12Okay.
30:13I used to hang out with Mary and Cody
30:15before I even married Cody.
30:17And they always were just goofy together.
30:20They had their arguments for sure.
30:23We were in it for the long haul.
30:25We were figuring it out.
30:26And there was a lot of emotional growth, I think,
30:28that came from all of us trying to figure out
30:30how to work with family
30:32around all the different personalities.
30:34The breakdown of mine and Cody's relationship
30:36is definitely not all on him
30:37because I definitely had my part in it.
30:40And I don't think that he likes to see that he failed.
30:46But if you didn't want to fail,
30:47maybe you shouldn't have married the wrong person
30:52one or two or three times.
30:54Nobody won here.
30:59I never would have thought we would be here.
31:01Yep, me either.
31:04I got a special phone call from a special person.
31:08I got a call from the church.
31:09They said they'd give Mary a release,
31:11a divorce on account of abandonment.
31:13I just don't believe that that's true at all.
31:15She was never abandoned.
31:17He knew it was happening.
31:18He could have been involved.
31:20He could have gone to the meeting with me.
31:24I know that they use the words abandonment
31:28and he really didn't like that.
31:31Most people don't like what is truth.
31:40Why'd you move so quickly on it then?
31:43Quickly?
31:45It's interesting that you're saying that it's quickly.
31:48This has been a long, long, slow and painful process.
31:52I married you in 1990 because I was committed to it
31:55and I loved you.
31:57Basically, the statements are all of this.
32:01You can choose, but I cannot.
32:04Who said that?
32:06When I was called and told about our-
32:08Termination.
32:09Termination.
32:10That's bull.
32:13Well-
32:13That is so not fair to me.
32:16And that is so not fair to you.
32:17I agree.
32:19I would have rather you have told me, Cody, years ago.
32:22I felt compelled to always stick it out with Mary,
32:25even though the relationship was terrible.
32:27I remember when Sonny and Cher got divorced when I was six
32:32and it rattled me.
32:34I do not know why I'm still holding on a little bit
32:40because I know damn well
32:44that I don't want to be in this relationship.
32:47And I know damn well
32:50that I don't want to be in a relationship with Janelle.
32:53And I know that Christine did me a favor
32:57by being brave enough to leave.
33:05Had I wanted to leave sooner, I would have left sooner.
33:10You don't know you're in a bad relationship.
33:12You just think you're in a normal relationship.
33:14Some people call it FNF and the second word is fight.
33:17That doesn't create intimacy.
33:19That just creates orgasms.
33:30I'm not gonna offer him a lot of information.
33:33With me, with Christine, with Janelle,
33:36they've left him, they've separated their relationships.
33:40They're gonna have lives
33:42that he doesn't need to know about.
33:45I think that realization
33:47is gonna be a little bit hard for him.
33:48Listen, it's confusing from day one.
33:52That's sad to me that our relationship was so confusing,
33:56that our relationship was so confusing
33:57after the first year, the second year,
33:59the fourth year or whatever.
34:00I wish I wouldn't have ever married her.
34:06I married a woman that I just didn't love so much
34:12that I wanted to serve her.
34:14And then because whatever I did was never enough.
34:22This marriage was on the rocks, the entire marriage.
34:28And how would I know that?
34:31Because I had such a better relationship
34:35with Janelle, with Christine, with Robin.
34:41And Janelle and Christine didn't survive.
34:46I should have gotten out of the relationship 25 years ago.
34:51I don't know who this guy is.
34:53To say the things that he's saying now,
34:56this is not the guy that we were married to.
34:59I wish you would have made your choice sooner.
35:02My choice was always to stay.
35:04Had I wanted to leave sooner, I would have left sooner.
35:10You don't get to be in plural marriage with a leadership.
35:13Leadership will never allow you to marry again
35:15if you're discarding wives.
35:16Well, I was in terrible relationships,
35:20but wasn't willing to discard them,
35:22didn't want to discard them,
35:23didn't even know I was in terrible relationships.
35:26You don't know you're in a bad relationship.
35:28You just think you're in a normal relationship
35:30because all your friends have the same problem
35:32until you're in a normal relationship
35:35that has deep emotional intimacy
35:38instead of the,
35:42some people call it F and F and the second word is fight,
35:45or F and F and the first word is fight.
35:50That doesn't create intimacy.
35:51That just creates orgasms.
35:54You know what really sucks?
35:56It's not divorce that sucks.
35:57It's marrying the wrong person because you don't know.
36:01Wow, okay.
36:03Because you married me at six months,
36:05you married the wrong person and you just didn't know.
36:07I'm not even saying that, Mary.
36:08That's what it sounded like.
36:09We're breaking up now.
36:10Does it mean it was the right person
36:11or was just right at the right time?
36:13I don't know.
36:14I can't philosophize this.
36:15We could philosophize it to death.
36:18All I know is that you and I have different timestamps
36:22on when we weren't happy.
36:24I don't know.
36:25I don't know.
36:26I don't know.
36:26I don't know.
36:27I don't know.
36:28I don't know.
36:29I don't know.
36:30We weren't happy anymore.
36:31Mm-hmm.
36:33What sucks is marrying the wrong person
36:37and not having the decency to tell her until 32 years later.
36:52I'm just excited to be with somebody.
36:54There's no threats of anybody else.
36:57It's just me.
36:59Isn't that weird to think of polygamy as a threat
37:02and the other women as a threat to your relationship?
37:06Remember how I told you my biggest thing
37:08on New Year's Eve was to have somebody to kiss?
37:10Because we all just did it together
37:12and you don't really have someone to kiss on New Year's Eve.
37:15Nothing wrong with being affectionate.
37:17Nothing wrong at all.
37:19Like, Cody and I never really were affectionate.
37:21Even when we were just together,
37:23with the two of us, we really weren't that much.
37:25Not like we are.
37:27Not like we are.
37:29No, we're not at all.
37:30No.
37:31Oh, my God.
37:32All the time.
37:33I love it.
37:36I didn't know I liked being affectionate so much.
37:38I felt like Cody and Robin were soulmates.
37:41I feel like today they are soulmates.
37:44And just like last week, I realized,
37:49oh, this is how soulmates feel.
37:53OK, now I know why Cody really wants to be over Robin's house
37:56all the time.
37:57This is how they feel.
37:58Of course, I would never want to leave David.
38:01I would not want to go stay somewhere else.
38:05If a polygamist were to find a soulmate
38:08and have a soulmate relationship with one of their wives,
38:12I don't know what that looks like for their family.
38:14Because how can he have a good relationship
38:16with his other wives if he has a soulmate relationship
38:20with one of them?
38:22I really do care for you.
38:24You're a lot of fun.
38:25I'm excited.
38:28I'm a little nervous, a little scared about where it's going,
38:31but I'm good for it.
38:32I'm 100% on.
38:33Me too.
38:34Because you're too good to be true.
38:37Same.
38:38Yeah.
38:39It's a little scary.
38:40It's a little scary because you're too good to be true.
38:42It's because it's too good to be true, right?
38:43Yes.
38:44That's why it's scary.
38:45Yep.
38:46How can we be soulmates so fast?
38:49We just clicked.
38:50It was just something there.
38:52It was just, I knew it was, I knew it was real.
38:56The second time I seen you, I really care a lot about you.
39:01God, I love you.
39:02So I'm excited to where this is going to be going to.
39:06I'm really excited.
39:08We are moving fast, but we're not going to slow down.
39:20I'm in a really good place.
39:22I feel very peaceful about our situation.
39:26He doesn't.
39:28Some of the things that he's saying
39:30are really, really, really mean.
39:34He clearly has a lot of internal that he still
39:38needs to work on here.
39:41Where we are now is I actually like you.
39:48Gods be praised.
39:49Gods be praised.
39:51Well, I didn't for six years at all.
39:55I was trying to be.
39:56I think it was more than that.
39:58Be honest with yourself.
39:59No, I was just, I don't even know.
40:01But it's like move from that point to get to the right place.
40:06I have no idea.
40:07I'm not going to go hang out at Christmas.
40:12I'm not your wife anymore.
40:14I do have a wife who says that Mary is our family
40:17and you need to have her come over for Christmas.
40:26I normally just disregard her opinion.
40:31Oh, yes, I do.
40:34Really, you don't know me if you think that I'm
40:37not a man of my own mind.
40:39I know you're a man of your own mind.
40:41I also know you take into consideration
40:43people's opinions.
40:45I don't know how we define ourselves
40:47with each other from here.
40:49We're exes.
40:51Let's be real.
40:53You don't need to worry about me.
40:58OK.
40:59I just wish you knew how amazing of a person I really am.
41:07I don't want any more enemies and I don't want another loss.
41:10I mean, bon voyage.
41:13I just, happy life, happy journey.
41:16I don't know what to say besides that, Mary.
41:18I just hope that in the future, Mary
41:20will call me when she's got something fun to share.
41:23I'm embarrassed that my other divorces have created
41:33contempt and contemptuous enemies.
41:36Yeah, I'm sad about that.
41:40We'll see.
41:41I just do not know what the future holds here.
41:46Next time on Sister Wives.
41:48So when we married in our church, it's not a big deal.
41:51Like, I didn't even have a dress.
41:53My wedding day and my reception was not about me.
41:58And stop.
41:59Perfect.
42:00He said what he wanted to do and he'd done it.
42:02He's so amazing.
42:03We're going to grow up now and put on a smiley face.
42:07OK, well, great.
42:08I hear you guys are engaged.
42:10Not engaged yet.
42:11Ugh, it's the end of January.
42:14We met the beginning of December.
42:15It is moving extremely fast, faster
42:18than I think I would like.
42:21Oh, that would be so cool to have a wedding here.
42:23I think he's done.
42:24Oh my gosh.
42:26It makes me just a little bit uncomfortable.