Nineties Eastenders (19th March 1998)
Category
🦄
CreativityTranscript
00:00MUSIC
00:26Is that Mum's birthday?
00:28Yeah. Look, do you think you could deliver mine for me?
00:30I've got things to do at the cab.
00:32Yeah, sure. No problem.
00:34Is it still all right for me to have Ben later on?
00:36Yeah, of course it is. He's over at Ian's.
00:39So how's it going so far?
00:40What?
00:41Ben's birthday.
00:42Fine. Look, I'm sorry, Phil. I'm going to have to run.
00:48Morning. Morning.
00:51Is it early for you two, innit?
00:52I'm going shopping.
00:54Can I tell her? I don't see why not.
00:56Are you looking for rings?
00:58Oh, why?
00:59Elizabeth Taylor, eat your heart out.
01:00See you. Ta-ta.
01:01Bye.
01:03This or this?
01:05Bit short, aren't they?
01:06I thought you was going to a synagogue.
01:08Either. They're both nice.
01:10You ain't going to let her go out looking like that.
01:12It's up to her, Mrs C.
01:13Well, of course. None of my business, Nigel.
01:15But sometimes I think all this liberal parenting
01:17can be a bit dangerous.
01:19I'll put the ironing board up.
01:22Thanks, Nigel.
01:24For what?
01:25You treat me like an adult.
01:27It's good that we can talk to each other about things, isn't it?
01:30Yeah.
01:31I mean, about everything. All subjects.
01:32Yeah.
01:34Because if there's ever anything you wanted to know,
01:36about anything, only we learn a lot of stuff at school nowadays.
01:39Stuff that you might not know about.
01:41Like what?
01:42You decided.
01:43Oh, this one.
01:45Better iron the both, just in case.
01:48Come on, then.
01:51Oh, it's fabulous.
01:52Well, personally, I prefer something smaller.
01:54No, it's lovely.
01:55Something to fit your finger rather than your wrist.
01:57No, you and all. It must be catching.
01:59Have you heard about my dad?
02:00No, what about him?
02:02Him and Irene are back together. It's official.
02:04Oh, that's nice.
02:06Yeah, they've just gone off to go and get the ring.
02:07No, no, she'll come back with a rock the size of Gibraltar.
02:10Yeah, what are you doing?
02:11Bottling up.
02:12No, not allowed. It's your birthday.
02:13Hey, is Grant about?
02:15Yeah, he's upstairs.
02:17Uh, where do you think you're going?
02:19Uh, Grant said there was a restaurant he recommended.
02:21I just want to check the address.
02:24Since when do they need Grant to recommend a restaurant?
02:26Yeah, let's have a look.
02:27Yeah, it's lovely, isn't it?
02:30Oh, my Nigel!
02:33I'm going down to Vic. Get out of the way.
02:36Uh, what were you talking about earlier?
02:39Can you turn it off?
02:42I'll show you how to use it later.
02:43The hairdryer?
02:44No, the internet.
02:45The internet?
02:47Well, it keeps a record of what people have been accessing.
02:49It tells me what pages have been used
02:51and what questions have been asked.
02:52Well, what's that got to do with me?
02:53Well, let's just say I didn't think you knew how to use it.
02:56I'm off to the shops.
02:57Would you like anything?
02:59I'll talk to you later.
03:00Oh, was this a private conversation?
03:03Not as far as I know.
03:04Uh, I'm going down to the pub.
03:06Right, hang on, Nigel.
03:07I'll walk across with you.
03:09Right.
03:10That weren't Nigel on the net, dear.
03:12That were me.
03:13What? You?
03:15All about HIV?
03:16Any reason why I shouldn't research these things?
03:19So, you giving them the works?
03:21Jelly, ice cream, all that?
03:22Yeah, Ian's really into it.
03:24When that bought Cilliac, it's all that party game.
03:26Good, he's taking some of the work away from you.
03:28You should slow down, Kath.
03:29Well, you can talk.
03:30Here we are, Saturday morning,
03:31you're up to your neck in housework.
03:33Yeah, but that's all I've got to worry about, innit?
03:35You've got babies, a divorce, not to mention that woman.
03:38Leave it, Pat.
03:39I'm sorry, I know you don't want to hear it,
03:40but that lawnmower's the last thing you need right now.
03:42I'll get it.
03:44Listen, thanks for the coffee.
03:45All right.
03:46Listen, thanks for the coffee.
03:48All right. Change the record, Pat.
03:56Barry? Hello, Kathy.
03:57Pat? Right, I'll just off.
03:58Kath, don't forget that, love.
04:00How could I?
04:01I didn't. See you.
04:02Enjoy the party, love.
04:05If it's your father you want,
04:06he's gone to see some bloke who might want a car.
04:08Oh, right. No, I was just checking,
04:09make sure everything's still OK.
04:10Checking for what?
04:11Well, if it's all right with you,
04:12I'd like to start shifting some gear around about lunchtime,
04:14you know, once the old papers are signed.
04:16Gear? What gear?
04:17Barry, you can't store stuff around here.
04:18We've hardly got room to swing a cat, as it is.
04:20He hasn't told you, has he?
04:22Told me what?
04:23That's how I could move in.
04:25So, what is it?
04:27It's, er, the Cree nicer.
04:29Cane and swan.
04:30Oh, I see.
04:31I was hoping you and Kathy would come and drink a toast to Ben.
04:34Do you want me to call it off?
04:36Mum, it's your birthday. I don't want to spoil it for you.
04:38I shouldn't have shown it to you.
04:39After all, it's not everyone who shares the same birthday
04:42with their own grandson.
04:44You want to play happy families,
04:45then we'll play happy families.
04:46I'm sorry, you know, that it all ended this way.
04:50Probably for the best.
04:52You'd better go home and get changed,
04:53or it'll be late, don't you?
04:54Yeah, I suppose so.
04:56Nigel, Gilly invited you.
04:57She wants you down there. Get going.
04:59Right.
05:00Oh, Nige, er, try and get out for last orders if you can, yeah?
05:04All right, yeah.
05:05A couple of scotches, please, Peggy.
05:07Large ones, and whatever those two are drinking.
05:10What are they doing together?
05:11They used to be in brothers.
05:13It's all right, I'll be in there. I'll get these.
05:14You're supposed to be upstairs having a day off.
05:17I take it congratulations are in order?
05:19Bush Telegraph working well, then?
05:20Oh, sorry, I didn't know it was supposed to be a secret.
05:22Well, it won't be for much longer, will it?
05:23Show them, Irene.
05:25Ta-da!
05:26Oh, it's lovely!
05:29Pass us a sick bucket.
05:31I can't. I've been eating it myself.
05:35I'm in here.
05:36Hello, love.
05:37No go, I'm afraid. He wanted an earlier model.
05:40How was your day?
05:41Oh, fabulous. I did the housework.
05:43Went round the supermarket, took the curts to the dry cleaners,
05:46and now I'm ironing. Great day off.
05:48Well, never mind.
05:49We've got a Peggy surprise due tonight.
05:50And I had a visit from Barry.
05:52Oh.
05:53Prior to him moving in. Thanks for telling me.
05:55Yeah, I meant to.
05:56You meant to, but you didn't.
05:57It's bad enough tripping over him at the porter cabin.
05:59He's my son. I'm not going to see him on the street, am I?
06:02Yeah, he's your son.
06:03But you share this house with me.
06:07Yes, please, we'd love some cake. I'll get the plates.
06:09Oh, hang on a bit, Ian. Any more and they're likely to burst.
06:12Why don't you sit down?
06:13I need to stop running around since I've been here.
06:15I don't mind.
06:16And being with the kids is the only time I get to behave like a complete idiot
06:18without someone trying to cart me off to the funny farm.
06:21Just think, a couple of years, they'll all be teenagers.
06:23Yeah, mums and dads, husbands and wives.
06:26Talking of which...
06:29Read this.
06:32She's, er, decided to sue me for divorce.
06:35Well, she meant it, then.
06:36When did you get this today?
06:38Unreasonable behaviour. It's a joke, isn't it?
06:42Yeah.
06:46You have a keen eyesight.
06:47Yeah. Not a very good day for us be-alls in the marriage states, eh?
06:51I'll go.
06:52Listen, are you doing anything tonight?
06:53Any pig he wants me to go over to Vic, he can touch the pig.
06:55You need a babysitter. It's all right, Mum, it's not a problem.
06:57I'm not doing anything.
06:58It's all right.
07:01Well, well, well, if we'd known there was a party,
07:02we'd have come early, wouldn't we, Nick?
07:04They're watching a cartoon. I won't disturb them right now.
07:06Hello, Mrs Mitchell. Doing your grandmother a duty?
07:08Actually, it's a pleasure, not a duty.
07:10Mum, it's Mick for you.
07:11Sorry to interrupt.
07:12Everything all right?
07:13Yeah, only there was a phone call. I thought I'd better come over.
07:16I was just saying, Ian,
07:17if we'd known there was a party, we'd have come earlier.
07:19Most people wait for an invitation before they come to a party.
07:21Oh, right. We'll have to reminisce the kids' birthdays.
07:24Remember to send Daddy an invitation.
07:28You all right, Mum?
07:29Yeah, there's been a bit of a problem. I'm gonna have to go.
07:30All right.
07:31You sure it's all right leaving Ben with you?
07:33Well, he's got nothing else to do, has he?
07:35No, it's fine, Mum. Go on, you go.
07:36I'll see you later, then. And you be a good boy.
07:40Right, come on, kids. Mummy's here.
07:42Party's over. Get your coats on.
07:51So what happens now?
07:53Oh, we shake hands.
07:54Yeah, I mean, what am I supposed to say?
07:56Oh, you'll think of something.
07:57You a friend of Josh?
07:58Yeah, I go to school with him. I'm Claire.
08:00Oh, the famous girlfriend.
08:02Rini, you're embarrassing the girl.
08:03Julie, lovely to see you.
08:05Oh, and he did so well.
08:07Well done. Not a foot wrong.
08:08Yeah, he takes after his old man.
08:10Hello, Nigel. Hi.
08:12Watcher, I thought you did really well.
08:14Take no notice of him, Josh.
08:15You'd think he'd know if you got the words wrong.
08:17Well, I'm no expert in Hebrew, but it sounded all right to me.
08:19So this is the new girlfriend, then, Josh?
08:21Aren't you Rini?
08:22Er, Nigel, you haven't met Elliot, have you?
08:24Elliot, this is Nigel.
08:25Oh, right. Oh, Claire's dad.
08:27That's right, yeah. Very nice to meet you.
08:28Likewise.
08:29I've put you on a table with all the fun people.
08:30Stop looking so tense.
08:31And you're on the top table with me.
08:33Oh, good.
08:34Drinks are up the other end and we don't eat till seven.
08:36Right, OK.
08:43Hello.
08:45He's nice.
08:46Who?
08:47Elliot, Josh's dad.
08:48Yeah.
08:49Hello. Hi.
08:59Excuse me.
09:00I'm Cathy, miss you.
09:02I had a phone call about Lorna Cartwright.
09:03Where is she?
09:04Where is she?
09:05Oh, she's with the doctor.
09:07Sorry, did he say you're a relative?
09:08No, I'm just afraid.
09:09Is she all right?
09:10I've no idea, I'm afraid.
09:12I'll give you a shout when they give me the nod, all right?
09:14Thanks.
09:16Hiya, it's Barry Norman.
09:17Who wants a drink?
09:18Was that... Did I just hear Robbie Jackson offered to buy me a drink?
09:21Well, make the most of it.
09:22It's not every day he gets a thousand quid to spend.
09:23You think I spend my winnings on drink?
09:25Nice pay, don't it?
09:26Come on, what are you having?
09:27Go on, Ella.
09:28Who's this gorgeous creature just come in?
09:31If you think that gets you a free drink,
09:32you've got another thing coming.
09:34There's some bitter lemons out the back under the brown ales if you need them.
09:37Will you take her away, please?
09:38Nothing would give me greater pleasure.
09:40Yep, and have a lovely time.
09:41We'll be back before closing.
09:43There's no hurry.
09:44I said we'd drink a toast to Ben, remember?
09:46And I expect Cecil and Cathy here when we get back.
09:48It's all under control.
09:49Now, you go before I pick you up and carry you out.
09:52I'd like to see you try.
09:53Well...
09:57Right, five minutes to let them get well clear,
09:58then action stations, yeah?
10:00Right.
10:02So, you're happy in your work?
10:03Found some kids to play with?
10:04You've only got to sort your love life out now, am I right?
10:06Two out of three's not bad, is it?
10:08So you've decided what you're going to do with the dog?
10:10Not yet, no. I just know I don't want to fritter it away.
10:12Unlike some people.
10:13I mean, you have to ask yourself, don't you, which came first?
10:16The wind and the horses or Irene deciding to kiss and make up?
10:19There's too much hidden in that B&B area.
10:20I suggest you start at the glass, Mum.
10:22Is she asleep?
10:23Finally.
10:26Oh!
10:28I shouldn't really be drinking this, should I?
10:30One glass is good for you.
10:31Oh, thanks.
10:32You're probably fine.
10:33She's just overexcited with the party and then coming here.
10:35Exactly.
10:36I mean, they're already totally confused and upset
10:38about what's going on.
10:39I haven't even told them about the divorce yet.
10:41I bet you half the kids they know have got divorced parents.
10:44It's not such a big deal these days.
10:45Come on, don't be so uptight.
10:47It's all going great.
10:49Kids are fine.
10:50We're fine.
10:52The little one is coming on a treat.
10:55Yeah.
10:56I suppose so.
10:58I suppose so.
11:11Hello, Kath.
11:13Thanks for coming.
11:16Couldn't think of what else to ask.
11:18Are you all right?
11:20What's it look like?
11:23Aren't you going to ask what happened?
11:24Well, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to.
11:27I think I deserved it.
11:29Lorna, don't.
11:30You looked harmless enough.
11:32Harmless?
11:34That's a stupid word.
11:37He called me dirt, Kath.
11:39He called me dirt and he cut me.
11:46Nigel. Nigel. Nigel.
11:50Move over to the table.
11:53Julie said we had to look after you.
11:55Hiya.
11:56What do you need looking after?
11:57There are teachers at Clare School.
12:00You'd better get used to this, Nigel.
12:01Be the engagement party next.
12:08Ladies and gentlemen.
12:09Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your attention, please?
12:13On behalf of Julie and myself,
12:16and, of course, most of all, Josh,
12:19I'd like to welcome you all here on this very happy occasion.
12:25I don't need to tell any of you that your son's bar mitzvah
12:29is really the proudest day in a dad's life.
12:31And mum's.
12:34And mum's. You know Julie never lets me off the hook.
12:37Oh, come on, get on with it.
12:38Sorry.
12:39Well, on behalf of the entire Saunders family,
12:41I'd like to welcome you all here to this happy occasion.
12:45I'm useless at making speeches.
12:47Yeah, you said it.
12:49So, without further ado,
12:50would the men ensure that their heads are covered
12:53as Rabbi Silverstone is now about to say grace?
12:56Well done.
13:01They still get on so well.
13:02It's amazing, really, considering the divorce.
13:05Of course it won't last. Really.
13:07What won't last?
13:08Of course.
13:10Baruch atah Adonai, Eloheinu melech haolam,
13:13hamotzi lechem min ha'aretz.
13:15Amen.
13:17A kid.
13:18Oh, she kept that quiet, didn't she?
13:20Just never came up, that's all.
13:21I mean, there had to be a snag, didn't there?
13:23Beautiful woman, great body, great, you know, everything.
13:27And a kid.
13:28Oh, well, so much for the lovely Lola.
13:29I can live with it.
13:30Oh, you're joking. This changes the whole picture, man.
13:32Listen, I like this woman.
13:34Right, how old?
13:35Eh?
13:36The kid, how old?
13:37Four. I like kids.
13:38And I thought you was a man of the world.
13:40Would you have a coffee, please?
13:42I thought you was on paint duty down at the, um, restaurant.
13:45Yeah, I am, only I told Mum I was popping out for a breather.
13:47She doesn't know how to smoke.
13:48I'll bet you a tenner she does.
13:50Mothers have a way of knowing everything.
13:52It's their job, ain't it?
13:53I mean, it's their obsession.
13:55Kids get in the way of everything else.
13:57No ways.
13:59Anyway, I'd best be getting back before the old bag arrives.
14:01I'll polish up the 78s.
14:03What's he on about?
14:04Take no notice, he's just got a funny attitude to women.
14:06No, I meant the 78s.
14:08Ancient music, Peggy Mitchell.
14:11Party over at the Vig.
14:12Great, an excuse to stop covering the world in Magnolia.
14:15Did I hear somebody say party?
14:17Yeah, but it's a private do.
14:18It's a pub, innit?
14:19How can you be private in a pub?
14:20Anyway, I'll do it if I'm allowed.
14:22I'll go and get changed.
14:23But I don't know if you're invited.
14:24Theresa!
14:26You don't want to go, Barry.
14:27It's going to be a load of old codgers.
14:29Yeah, old codgers and birds like that.
14:30It sounds just fine to me.
14:32Yeah, but Barry...
14:36Bridge Street Caf?
14:38Lola.
14:44Yeah, cheers, George.
14:49I thought I was going to play the Queen.
14:52Yeah.
14:53Where's the cake?
14:54Ready and waiting.
14:55Right, everybody, five minutes.
14:56No!
14:58Five minutes, where's the cake?
14:59Over there.
15:01That's it, you can go home now.
15:03Can you take her?
15:05Yeah, of course.
15:06Get your GP to look at the wound in five days, all right?
15:08And don't worry, it really will fade with time.
15:11And be more careful in future, eh?
15:16What did you tell her?
15:17I had an accident with a kitchen knife.
15:19I had to say something, otherwise she'd have called the police.
15:22I'm sorry, Cath.
15:23I shouldn't have phoned you.
15:24No, I'm glad you did.
15:26Could you lend us the money for a cab on it?
15:28I haven't got any to get home.
15:30You think I'd let you go home?
15:32Come on.
15:44Come on!
15:45We don't allow parties at home!
16:16All right, Nigel, I was just going to go and get us a drink.
16:19Can I get you anything?
16:20No, I'm fine.
16:21Don't go away.
16:22No, I think we should be heading home.
16:23Why? They've just got Sky, why don't you have a dance or something?
16:26I'll go and get our coach.
16:27Oh, but Nigel, don't you just dance?
16:28You don't know when it's changing.
16:30I think this is a natural dancer here.
16:31I think it's life under a cushion.
16:32Come on, Nigel.
16:34Oh, no, he can't. He says he's got to go home.
16:36Oh, but you can't do that.
16:37He'll be deprived of the vomits before he has his girlfriend.
16:39Exactly.
16:40Look, it's the most important night of his life, Nigel.
16:42Come on.
16:43Come on, Nigel.
16:44I'll give you some money for a taxi home, Claire.
16:46I've got a bad migraine.
16:47A taxi? All alone at her age?
16:50You must be mad.
16:51No, you're right.
16:52Look, look, look, we'll give her a lift home. David won't mind.
16:54Oh, the square is here.
16:55Yeah, that's not far.
16:56Midnight all right?
16:57You're sure?
16:58Come on.
16:59Come on.
17:00Woo!
17:02Da-da-da-da-da.
17:05La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
17:08Right, they're here.
17:09Now, come on, everyone.
17:11It's supposed to be a surprise.
17:12It's like a funeral parlour in here.
17:14Make like you're in a pub for having sex.
17:17Whoo!
17:18Happy birthday to you.
17:22Happy birthday to you.
17:26Happy birthday to you.
17:28Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Katie. Happy birthday to you.
17:43Oh, give everyone a drink, Brian. And where's Kathy? I want to drink a toast to that grandson of mine.
17:49Brian, who wants a drink?
17:59Look, I'll just see you in, I'll put the kettle on, and then I've just got to nip out for a couple of minutes, OK?
18:04There's something I need to do.
18:06Nigel!
18:08I can't believe you're doing this. You're making me look really stupid.
18:12Julie won't miss you.
18:13No. She only wanted me to come because I'm your dad.
18:16No, she didn't.
18:17You're the important one. Go and have a good time.
18:19Nigel!
18:20Anyway, I've told Grant I'll be back at the Vic for last orders. It's Peggy's birthday.
18:23Go on. Don't break the party. I'll see you at home. Midnight, all right?
18:30Bye.
18:35Kathy, where have you been? You missed the surprise.
18:38Yeah, so as of tomorrow, you're a resident of Albert Square, then?
18:41Don't remind me.
18:42You'll never hack at me.
18:44Why not?
18:45Because living with Pat Evans is like flat sharing with Ivan the Terrible.
18:48She looks all right.
18:49Oh, yeah, to the casual observer.
18:51Listen, mate, you can crash at ours any time you like.
18:53Yeah, at a price.
18:55You must be joking. When I want to live like an animal, you'll be my first port of call.
18:59Charming.
19:00Right, just for that, you can get the first round in.
19:02Yeah, I'm the one after that.
19:03Or can't you afford it now that you're Mr Down and Out?
19:07Doubles, was it?
19:09Great, I like vodka.
19:10Right, you are. Double vodka. Come on.
19:13Works every time.
19:16Right, Nigel, what can I get you?
19:18Happy birthday.
19:19Thanks, darling.
19:20Where have you been?
19:22As much as I'd like to make this a public announcement,
19:25I'll take a hint to keep this low-key.
19:27A toast to little Ben.
19:29May the rest of his life be happy and fulfilled,
19:32with the love and support of all his family.
19:34I'm sure it will.
19:36To Ben.
19:37To Ben.
19:41Right, you're supposed to have me at a dance, aren't you?
19:47Well, I suppose we should drink a toast to the divorce.
19:49I don't drink vanilla.
19:51How can I forget?
20:04Where's Nigel?
20:05He's gone.
20:06He's gone?
20:07Yeah, he went for Queen Vic.
20:09And he never said goodbye.
20:11Oh, he just slipped out. He didn't want to make a fuss.
20:13I got the impression that he thought you wouldn't miss him.
20:15Yeah.
20:17Clare.
20:18I thought you were supposed to be at that bar meet, but...
20:21Where's Clare?
20:22She's coming back at midnight.
20:23What, on her own?
20:24No, she's getting a lift.
20:25What are you doing in here?
20:27Trying to have a quiet drink.
20:28Ooh, sorry I asked.
20:31Drink, Mum.
20:32Thanks.
20:33Oh, it's all right, Mark.
20:34Barry's hooked on him.
20:36I can't hardly notice him.
20:38We'll have a look at Gibsall's and all that.
20:40Oh, right.
20:41Cheers.
20:42Cheers.
20:43Cheers.
20:45He could pay the deposit on a fatly amount of money he's spending in here.
20:49Right, sorry.
20:51So, how are you keeping?
20:54Oh, I'm fine, thanks.
20:56Have they, um, staffed you on one of these combination drug therapies yet?
21:01Well, yes, they have, as a matter of fact.
21:03Is it all right for you to be drinking with it?
21:06Well, it's fine with the things I'm on, yeah.
21:08Because I've been looking it up on the net.
21:10And you want to make sure they start on the treatment, Mark, at the right time.
21:14Otherwise, you won't get the full benefit.
21:26Look, you've got to see this.
21:27It's ever so funny.
21:28Come on.
21:29Look.
21:30Look at your Barry.
21:33Never cease to amaze me.
21:35Sorry.
21:36Look.
21:37Just when you think you've got her sussed, she does the opposite of what you're expecting.
21:40True of all women, mate.
21:41And they're right, Nigel.
21:42Hey, women.
21:44I don't tell me you and Julie have had a quarrel.
21:46A quarrel makes it sound exciting.
21:48It wasn't exciting.
21:49It was depressing.
21:50I let her. She didn't want me.
21:51Well, I'm not surprised you had to face up to the one you've got on now.
21:53You want to take a leaf out of Barry's book?
21:55Oh!
21:56Oh!
21:57Oh!
22:00Oh!
22:01Oh!
22:02Oh!
22:03Oh!
22:04I don't think so.
22:05It's getting me up now.
22:07Oh!
22:08Oh!
22:09Oh, my ankle!
22:10Oh, it's swelling up.
22:12Pat, I'm really sorry.
22:14Sorry doesn't quite cover it, Barry.
22:15It did it this morning and it doesn't now.
22:17Pat.
22:18I'm all right, love.
22:19I think it's just a sprain.
22:20Don't worry.
22:21I'll look after her.
22:22Come on, Pat.
22:23You come through to the back.
22:24I'll call Dr Legge and see if he can come over.
22:25Grant, give Roy a hand.
22:26You all right, Pat?
22:27Yes, thanks.
22:28Take it easy.
22:29You all right, Pat?
22:30You all right, Pat?
22:31Stupid boy.
22:32Not your day, then.
22:33I don't think so, no.
22:34Barry, I've just tidied up your bar bill
22:36and so far it comes to over 30 quid now.
22:38Do you want to clean that up with us now
22:39or do you want to wait until closing?
22:43Cath?
22:45What?
22:48Thanks for showing up.
22:49It meant a lot to Mum.
22:50Yeah.
22:51You've got to get back to Ben, have you?
22:52Yeah.
22:53Well, look, I'll look after him if you like
22:55and you can get back to the party.
22:57No, you're right.
22:58Actually, he's done over at Inn tonight
22:59so I don't need a babysitter anyway.
23:01You'll come back to the party, then?
23:03Phil, we're divorced, all right?
23:05I don't have to be at the party if I don't want to
23:07and I don't want to.
23:08I want to go home.
23:12Oh!
23:14Would you like a drink?
23:15Do you think I came all the way over here
23:16because I wanted a drink?
23:18No, of course not.
23:19Look, I'm sorry about...
23:20Look, I'm the one who's sorry.
23:21I invited some vile family do where you hardly know anyone.
23:24I'll leave you to fend for yourself.
23:25No, no, it's fine. Honest.
23:26But they certainly didn't look fine from where I was standing.
23:29OK?
23:30I need to speak about the costumes for the soldiers.
23:32Oh, is it all right if I give you a ring tomorrow?
23:34Yeah, all right.
23:35Look, I'm sorry I left.
23:37What?
23:38I'm sorry, I...
23:39Oh, this is hopeless.
23:40Can we go to yours?
23:41Yeah, yeah, of course.
23:42Come on, then.
23:44Come on, Doc.
23:45Come down here, join us.
23:46Where are you going?
23:48Oh, great.
23:49Oh, like I said.
23:52Oh, lovely sons.
23:54Aren't they wonderful?
23:55Oh.
23:58I'm sorry I left the bar mitzvah.
24:01So why did you?
24:02Oh, I promised to be back at the Vic.
24:04Come on, that's not the reason.
24:09I thought we were friends, Nigel.
24:13I know what you think of me.
24:15Good old Nigel.
24:17Always there to lend a hand. Reliable, solid, good for a laugh.
24:22The thing is, it...
24:24It's not like that for me, Julie.
24:26Not where you're concerned.
24:31I'll put the kettle on.
24:33Coffee.
24:36And a special thanks to my wonderful sons
24:39who managed to organise all this
24:41without me having a clue what they were up to.
24:44I've been through it twice, Barry, and at least right.
24:47Which is how it's been since they were small boys, if the truth be known.
24:50Mum, I think it's enough of the fond memories, yeah?
24:52Oh, and one more thing before you all go.
24:55I'd like to wish Terry and Irene all the best for the future.
24:59I'm not going to say any more because I think that's up to them.
25:02But just to give you a clue,
25:04I think Irene's going to make Terry a very happy man.
25:07So I'd like you all to join me in wishing them every happiness.
25:11Terry and Irene!
25:14I'll give it a year. That long.
25:16Now, for Gorse 8-0, before the law gets here.
25:20Come on, everybody.
25:23Your brother on Jimmy tonight, is he?
25:25Listen, whatever Beppe does when he's being a policeman
25:28is nothing to do with me, all right?
25:30I'm sorry, Dad, I didn't realise the rounds were just stacking up.
25:39It's, um... It's decaffeinated. I thought that'd be best.
25:43Look, I'm so sorry. That was so stupid of me.
25:46I shouldn't have blurted it all out like that.
25:48I know you don't feel the same.
25:50I'm going away, so we haven't got time to mess about.
25:54I think we should be honest with one another, Nigel.
25:58Yeah.
26:01So I'll just say it.
26:05I feel the same.
26:08I wasn't going to say anything because I was leaving,
26:11because I didn't see the point in getting involved.
26:14And now?
26:16Well, now I don't care about all that.
26:20Being sensible, doing the right thing.
26:24I just care about now.
26:27So what shall we do?
26:30Well, um...
26:36You could start by inviting me to stay.
26:40Stay? What, here?
26:43Nigel, how can I put this bluntly?
26:47Where's the bedroom?
26:49My bedroom? I sleep in here.
26:51Oh, right.
26:53Um, right.
26:56Well...
26:58this should guarantee us a little bit of...
27:02privacy.
27:06I'm, er...
27:08I'm not much good at this. I don't know what to do.
27:11Well, you could kiss me for a start.
27:14Kiss me for a start.
27:45I'm not much good at this. I don't know what to do.
27:48Kiss me for a start.
27:50Kiss me for a start.