The Three Badasses Who Want Me Short Drama
The Three Badasses Who Want Me Short Drama
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Sir, I found Angela Lockhart.
00:00:15Angela, still selling your hippie junk here?
00:00:18I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity.
00:00:23Now sign the divorce paper.
00:00:27Baby.
00:00:29I'll sign it.
00:00:31Here, don't look right at it.
00:00:36My lovely princess, I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from.
00:00:41I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:00:47You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:00:50I'm going. I need to pick up my bride.
00:00:53No!
00:00:55Prepare my warplane!
00:01:01What's the situation here?
00:01:03I want to marry you.
00:01:06Ellen Musk, the only woman on the Forbes 30 Under 30 list, arrives in Atlanta today.
00:01:11What a business tycoon is doing here in Georgia, a forgotten stage no one knows.
00:01:16Angela, my next-door neighbor.
00:01:19Still selling your hippie junk here?
00:01:21If your mother-in-law sees, she's going to throw a big fit again.
00:01:25Your mother-in-law was right about you.
00:01:27What's the point of watching the news all day about these moguls if you can't even apply it to your penniless self?
00:01:31And how do you know that this is none of my business?
00:01:36All right, everybody get out!
00:01:38We've got an important guest coming!
00:01:41Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:01:47All right, everybody get out!
00:01:49We got an important guest coming!
00:01:51We got an important guest coming!
00:01:55You!
00:02:00You deaf? I said pack up and scram!
00:02:03I paid the staff here already, and if you want me to leave, then fine, but you have to compensate for today's losses.
00:02:10You want to say that again?
00:02:14You know who's visiting today?
00:02:16Ellen freakin' Musk! One of the richest people in the world!
00:02:20Ellen Musk?
00:02:21Of course a hick like you probably never heard of her. Just know that you can't afford to piss her off.
00:02:28Really? Ellen Musk is flying all the way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market.
00:02:34You don't think that she could be coming to see me?
00:02:37Coming to see you? Alright, you know what, I'll play your game. If she does this so much as give you a glance, I'll eat dirt.
00:02:51Deal.
00:03:00Ellen Musk, get to the flea market within ten minutes, or else, you're fired.
00:03:08Hmm.
00:03:24Prepare the limo. Ms. Lockhart requires us immediately.
00:03:29Ah, your ten minutes is almost up.
00:03:31Good. Hope you don't wet your pants.
00:03:34Five.
00:03:35Four.
00:03:38Three.
00:03:40Two.
00:03:42One.
00:03:45Ellen! Uh, I mean, Ms. Musk, uh, Ellen, uh, I mean, uh, I'm sorry that I...
00:03:52Ellen! Uh, I mean, Ms. Musk, uh, Ellen, uh, I mean, uh, I'm sorry that I, uh, sorry to frighten you.
00:04:01How's my boss pitch?
00:04:03Kickin' ass, girlfriend.
00:04:05So how do you, like...
00:04:08She's my boss.
00:04:10Eh, I prefer business partner over best friend.
00:04:14No way.
00:04:18Well?
00:04:22No. No! No, no, I'm sorry for offending your boss! No, I won't do it again!
00:04:30Alright, that's enough. We're not tyrants here.
00:04:39Sir, I found Angela Lockhart.
00:04:43Angela Lockhart
00:04:47You mean Angela Lockhart.
00:04:50My runaway bride.
00:04:53You made me lose one million dollars in just one game of poker.
00:04:58Who are you?
00:05:01Where is she?
00:05:03Atlanta. And you were right. It was secretly her propping up Ellen Musk.
00:05:07My clever bride. I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:05:13Max, prep the jet. I'm heading to Atlanta.
00:05:23Dr. Wilson, that McSterling's on the move. He's headed to Atlanta.
00:05:27Atlanta? The game is afoot. I'm going.
00:05:30Wait, Dr. Wilson, the Prince of Bhutan needs your medical attention.
00:05:33He can wait. I need to pick up my bride.
00:05:39Dr. Wilson!
00:05:43Gino Eisenhower reporting, sir!
00:05:46Douglas Sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta.
00:05:49Atlanta!
00:05:51Where is that?
00:05:53Whatever. Prepare my warplane.
00:05:55Don't sue going after my fiancée. This is war.
00:06:13I've secretly allowed your husband, Jared Cooper, to win the bid on the Maple Plaza project like you asked me to.
00:06:24Thank you so much, Ellen. This is going to be the best anniversary gift ever.
00:06:29That project is worth billions. He can finally take his company public.
00:06:33But Angela, my boss, I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity.
00:06:42Without your backing, no offense, but he's nothing without you.
00:06:48Well, three years ago...
00:06:50Three years ago...
00:07:11You saved me.
00:07:13He saved me and I fell in love with him instantly.
00:07:17I didn't want to reveal my true identity because I didn't want him to feel the pressure of being with a billionaire heiress.
00:07:24But now, with this contract, I feel like we'll be on more equal footing and then I can finally come out to the public.
00:07:31So that's why you have me secretly helping him.
00:07:34I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out.
00:07:36But why work at the flea market? Are you disguising yourself to test him?
00:07:42Well, these exotic spices are incredibly rare and cost a fortune to find.
00:07:47Plus, I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom.
00:07:51You seem happy being a housewife.
00:07:57Where the hell are you? Don't tell me you're on the phone.
00:08:01Where the hell are you? Don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again.
00:08:06Get home, stat. It's a big day today.
00:08:10That was...
00:08:12My mother-in-law, Carol.
00:08:14She judges me because she thinks I come from a lower class family.
00:08:18But she's going to be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am.
00:08:23You know, she even remembered our third year anniversary.
00:08:27Please spend more time with my son.
00:08:31Hi, I'm home.
00:08:33I have a big announcement I have to make.
00:08:36Finally, you're back. Now sign the divorce papers.
00:08:41Divorce papers?
00:08:44Is this some sort of misunderstanding, Mom?
00:08:47Oh, God. Don't worry, Mom.
00:08:51Is this some sort of misunderstanding, Mom?
00:08:54Oh, God. Don't call me Mom again. We're ending that relationship.
00:09:00Just look at you. Dirt all over.
00:09:03You're selling the title of Mrs. Cooper.
00:09:05You don't deserve my son. You're way below his league.
00:09:09I'm below his league?
00:09:11That's right. You are.
00:09:13Jared is signing a hundred billion dollar contract tomorrow with the Ellen Musk.
00:09:19And then his company's going public.
00:09:22That's how much he's accomplished in three years.
00:09:25But you? You're still just a stinky hippie peddler.
00:09:30Jared's like the king in the clouds.
00:09:33And you?
00:09:35You will always just be a pawn.
00:09:38Like dirt on our shoes.
00:09:41Dirt on our shoes.
00:09:44Dirt on your shoes?
00:09:46But Ellen Musk works for me.
00:09:49You're delusional. You will never upgrade to a queen.
00:09:54How dare you compare yourself to the real deal here.
00:09:59Resorting to lies. Definitely not good enough for Jared.
00:10:03And who are you to come into my house and meddle with my family matters?
00:10:11You're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife.
00:10:16Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee.
00:10:19Not a lowlife dirtbag.
00:10:21Enough!
00:10:23Jared, I knew you wouldn't divorce me.
00:10:27But I am.
00:10:29Don't fight it, Angela.
00:10:32Here's 500K.
00:10:34You'll never make this much as a hippie peddler selling spices.
00:10:38Now sign the papers, take your check, and leave.
00:10:41Don't stress yourself further.
00:10:44I've done so much for you these past three years.
00:10:49Did that not mean anything to you?
00:10:52Didn't expect you to be so greedy.
00:10:55Fine. Here's another 200,000.
00:10:59500,000 is too much for her already.
00:11:02She's done nothing.
00:11:04Hasn't even contributed a grandchild.
00:11:07She just sells cheap grass all day.
00:11:09Is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:11:13I took care of both of you these past three years.
00:11:17You think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something?
00:11:22And she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench?
00:11:26A hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO?
00:11:30What a joke.
00:11:32If you actually love my son, you'll sign the damn divorce papers already.
00:11:37And leave!
00:11:40You really think that Jared would have gotten that Maple Plaza bid without me?
00:11:45Let alone taking the company public?
00:11:48I did everything for you, Jared.
00:11:51Now you take credit for my son's success?
00:11:58It's all my work!
00:12:02Baby, we're going to be late for the auction if we keep letting this psycho stall us.
00:12:10You did say you would win me Princess Diana's tiara, didn't you?
00:12:15So, she's the reason for the divorce.
00:12:19She's worth more than you, Angela.
00:12:23Fine. I'll sign it.
00:12:27But don't regret it.
00:12:30Regret?
00:12:32Do you know who I am?
00:12:34Yeah, a cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed?
00:12:37I'm Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
00:12:41Jared winning the bid on Maple Plaza was because of my dad.
00:12:47Because he's business partners with Elon Musk.
00:12:50It's part of the power that I have as an elite.
00:12:55You can't do shit because you're poor.
00:12:58Social stratum matters.
00:13:01Yeah, social stratum does matter.
00:13:03And the Coopers are beneath me.
00:13:07And you really think Elon Musk would come to Atlanta if it weren't for me?
00:13:12Ha! You're delusional.
00:13:15Now sign the papers and scram!
00:13:21You owe me.
00:13:23You dirty bitch. You sicken me.
00:13:26You hit me.
00:13:30Now sign the papers, take a track, and get the fuck out!
00:13:55I don't need your penny money.
00:13:59We're finished.
00:14:01You don't want the money? That's your loss.
00:14:04Your check is just pennies to me.
00:14:07But I would like my ring back.
00:14:18Have fun on your economy flight while I catch a ride on my private helicopter out of here.
00:14:26And I'm way out of your league.
00:14:36Isn't that the Winston blue diamond ring?
00:14:40It's worth tens of millions of dollars.
00:14:44Oh, it's probably just cheap glass.
00:14:47Something she found at the flea market.
00:14:50You're right. She could never afford anything so expensive.
00:14:54Congrats, Jared Boo Boo, on getting rid of that dirt bag.
00:14:59Oh! My dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon at tomorrow's summit.
00:15:06Bigger big shot than Elon Musk?
00:15:09Yeah. And nobody's met them, but I can introduce you.
00:15:14Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:15:17Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:15:34Angela, Mr. Vanderbilt, the richest man in Georgia, wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding.
00:15:39Vanderbilt?
00:15:41Yeah, he's actually CEO of one of our companies. Basically our employee.
00:15:44Okay, I'll meet him at the summit tomorrow. It's fine.
00:15:47You're still going to the summit tomorrow? You and Jared Cooper are already divorced.
00:15:51That's exactly why I'm going.
00:16:15Angela Lockhart.
00:16:18I finally found you.
00:16:20Who is he?
00:16:22That? That's Devin Sterling.
00:16:25He's number one on Forbes' 30 under 30 list, an early investor of crypto, CEO of Sterling Enterprises.
00:16:31Rumor has it he's worth trillions.
00:16:34And he's your fiancé.
00:16:37What? My fiancé?
00:16:41The one and only.
00:16:43So, after running away and leaving me single for three years, have you figured out how you're going to make it up to me yet, babe?
00:17:00That tiara looks perfect on you.
00:17:06What is she doing here?
00:17:08You skank! My son just divorced you yesterday and you're already hooking up with another man?
00:17:15Divorced?
00:17:17That's right. So, I guess this was never meant to be, Mr...
00:17:23Sterling. Devin Sterling.
00:17:27So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:17:30So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:17:34Guess she's not just a forsaken woman, she's also a stinky, penniless whore.
00:17:41How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:17:45Who the fuck are you, bitch?
00:17:48Do you know who I am?
00:17:50They don't know who you are.
00:17:53You hide it well.
00:17:56X-Team! Teach these fools a lesson.
00:18:01Teach these fools a lesson.
00:18:06Sir, you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta and then to New York.
00:18:11You forgot to bring the security team.
00:18:18Mind if I borrow your men?
00:18:21Go ahead.
00:18:25Chelsea's ill-mannered hips out!
00:18:28You bitch! I'll have my son teach you a real lesson!
00:18:38A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:18:42No.
00:18:50Guest list is very distinguished tonight.
00:18:52You've got Bill Ford, Harvey Buffett, old money like me.
00:18:58Gentlemen, Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper.
00:19:01Pleased to meet you all.
00:19:03Your families all started empires after the Industrial Revolution. What an honor.
00:19:07I heard you secured the Maple Plaza project.
00:19:10It's worth billions of dollars.
00:19:12Congrats. You'll be next.
00:19:14Thank you. But we haven't received the contract yet. We deserve it.
00:19:18That's nothing. I introduced this kid to Ellen Musk.
00:19:20Vanderbilts and Miss Musk have always had a good relationship.
00:19:24So, I thought I'd help the kid out, pull a few strings.
00:19:28Thank you, Mr. Vanderbilt.
00:19:30Now, we just have to impress Miss Musk's special guest of honor.
00:19:34Yes. I heard they're a very important and powerful guest.
00:19:38Even wealthier than Ellen Musk.
00:19:41Now, if we can just secure a position with this big shot, we can feast for generations.
00:19:51I'll do my best.
00:19:57Excuse me. A second, gentlemen.
00:19:59What if it's the Prince of Bhutan?
00:20:04How did a hobo like you sneak in here?
00:20:07Me? A hobo? How did a cheating scumbag like you sneak in here?
00:20:12You sleep your way in?
00:20:14I told you, Angela Lockhart, don't bother stalking me.
00:20:16Nothing will come of it, and it only sickens me further.
00:20:18Don't flatter yourself.
00:20:23This is your ex-husband?
00:20:27What, were you blindfolded when you married him?
00:20:30Who the hell is this? You were cheating on me?
00:20:32You were cheating on me?
00:20:45Son, you have to avenge me and Kaylee.
00:20:49That wicked ex-wife of yours hired some thugs and a gigolo to beat us up.
00:20:54They even took Kaylee's tiara.
00:21:03You dare hurt my mom and Kaylee?
00:21:08Get your hands off of her!
00:21:14My lady.
00:21:33My queen.
00:21:46It's... it's him!
00:21:49He scammed a million dollars off me in a game of poker yesterday.
00:21:53Who are these peasants?
00:21:55These seats are reserved for the Ellen Muskiner special guest.
00:22:00Oh, shut up, old man.
00:22:03You're disturbing the peace.
00:22:07Fuckers, you know who that is?
00:22:09That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:22:11You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:22:14His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:22:18This civil war would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:22:21Vanderbilt.
00:22:23The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt.
00:22:28Who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:22:32That only Vanderbilt family.
00:22:41Oh, goddammit.
00:22:43Stomachache now?
00:22:47Whatever.
00:22:49Angela can handle herself. She'll be fine.
00:23:03How dare you call one of us low?
00:23:06I'm Harvey F. N. Buffett.
00:23:08The most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:23:11I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:23:16And I can wipe you out with just a strand of my hair.
00:23:20Not with me around.
00:23:22I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen.
00:23:27You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:23:32You're fucking delusional, Angela.
00:23:35We've had enough of your games.
00:23:37Security! Break their limbs and toss them out.
00:23:41Looks like the old guard is teaming up against you.
00:23:44But don't worry. You got new money here.
00:23:49I can handle myself, thank you.
00:23:51Yes, my queen.
00:23:53You're all despicable.
00:23:56An insult to your family names.
00:23:58Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:24:02Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:24:05Cut off all business ties.
00:24:08And if you don't,
00:24:11I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:24:16I'll do it.
00:24:18You're here to fuck with me.
00:24:20You can't fool anyone here.
00:24:22How much money did you spend on that getup?
00:24:24And to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:24:26You're an orphan.
00:24:28Who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:24:31You have nothing.
00:24:33And you will always be nothing.
00:24:35She's a gold digger.
00:24:38Gold digger?
00:24:40Gigolo.
00:24:42Wanna try me for a night?
00:24:44Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:24:46Mr. Vanderbilt, we really shouldn't keep these bandits here any longer.
00:24:49They might upset Miss Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:24:52Angela Lockhart is my spurned ex-wife.
00:24:54She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza project.
00:24:56Oh, I'm gonna kill that sushi chef!
00:24:59Security!
00:25:05Security!
00:25:07You all don't realize that you actually all work for me.
00:25:11And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:25:13You!
00:25:15Insolent fools.
00:25:17Let me guess.
00:25:19You're that special guest?
00:25:21I don't know.
00:25:23Throw them out!
00:25:24And not without some broken bones, too.
00:25:33Back down, ass.
00:25:38I got this.
00:25:55Whoa!
00:25:57Hey! Hey!
00:26:05What the hell are you two doing here?
00:26:08I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:26:10No, you're supposed to make sure Miss Lockhart is okay.
00:26:13Oh my God, we're so screwed!
00:26:24Angela!
00:26:26Don't hurt her!
00:26:28You bitch. I've always been sick of you.
00:26:30You just threw yourself at me.
00:26:32How dare you insult my boss like that?
00:26:34Boss?
00:26:36Did she say her boss?
00:26:38Miss Musk? That's Ellen Musk?
00:26:40That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:26:43My boss and sole heiress to the Henry Lockhart's fortune.
00:26:46Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:26:49Past the American Revolution?
00:26:51Back to the Renaissance.
00:26:52If she's your boss, then that means Angela Lockhart is...
00:26:55That's Lady Lockhart to you. She's royalty.
00:26:58And since you're all subsidiaries, she's your boss's boss.
00:27:02What the hell did you do?
00:27:04Kneel to me!
00:27:06Oh, Your Majesty.
00:27:08Welcome to the United States.
00:27:11We've always been your loyal subjects.
00:27:14Yes, Your Highness.
00:27:16Is it a queen or princess?
00:27:18It doesn't matter.
00:27:19My queen, please forgive our insolence.
00:27:22We didn't mean to offend.
00:27:25Hey, what are you doing, idiot?
00:27:27Let go of the boss, lady, and beg for forgiveness!
00:27:39What rightfully belongs to you.
00:27:50She's a badass herself.
00:27:52He missed out on a good wife.
00:27:54You, you, you told me your wife was a hippie peddler.
00:27:58Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag this entire time.
00:28:01No, no, don't believe their lies.
00:28:03I worked hard for everything.
00:28:05You worked for everything?
00:28:08I'm sorry.
00:28:10I'm sorry.
00:28:12I'm sorry.
00:28:14I'm sorry.
00:28:16I'm sorry.
00:28:17I'm sorry.
00:28:24Hey Henry.
00:28:26So, our 30th anniversary is coming up
00:28:29and I thought that maybe we could do something special this year.
00:28:32I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:28:34I have to figure out this bid for the Maple Closet Project
00:28:37and if I get it I can take the company public.
00:28:39You were nothing before me.
00:28:48All your achievements, all your glory, that's all mine, including the Maple Plaza contract.
00:28:56I can take all of that away, just like that.
00:29:01No, you can't take that away from me.
00:29:03That's why Elon Musk was urging us to pass on deals to this nobody.
00:29:07Oh, and this antique wedding ring, yeah, I forgot to tell you.
00:29:12It was Queen Victoria's, and its worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's
00:29:16GDP.
00:29:17Oh, no.
00:29:18I gave you back the ring?
00:29:26I divorced a royal heiress?
00:29:28No!
00:29:29No!
00:29:30Please!
00:29:31No!
00:29:32No!
00:29:33Please take me back!
00:29:34I still love you!
00:29:35Please!
00:29:38Oh, man, looks like they've started the party without us.
00:29:41No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower!
00:29:51Guard these two again.
00:29:52Did he say...
00:29:53Is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:29:56President Eisenhower's descendant.
00:29:57After General Eisenhower won World War II, each of his descendants have all gone on to
00:30:01become five-star generals, the highest rank in the nation's military.
00:30:05I'm glad you buffoons know your history.
00:30:07Sorry I'm late, babe.
00:30:08I got lost trying to find Atlanta, then lost again on my way back to New York.
00:30:17And that there is, that is the legendary, boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:30:22He's Dr. House's protege!
00:30:24Dr. House?
00:30:25I thought that was just a TV show.
00:30:27Oh, no, that's based on a real figure.
00:30:29Yep, that's me.
00:30:30Son of James House.
00:30:32Dr. House?
00:30:33He's practically my uncle.
00:30:34I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him when I was just 12 years old.
00:30:38So he's been off carrying himself a waterfall somewhere in the Netherlands for the last
00:30:4214 months.
00:30:44And I'm late because I ran out of gum and had to make a pit stop.
00:30:52Hey, Ellen.
00:30:53Who are these weirdos and why are they here?
00:30:56Uh, they're all your fiancés.
00:30:59What?
00:31:00Fiancés?
00:31:03Plural?
00:31:05Fiancés?
00:31:06Plural?
00:31:08Watch it, nerds!
00:31:09I'm her fiancé!
00:31:11No, I'm her fiancé!
00:31:12You can both shut up!
00:31:14I'm her fiancé!
00:31:15It's you!
00:31:16It's me!
00:31:17Who the hell is he?
00:31:18I'm Spider-Man.
00:31:21How are all three of these men my fiancé?
00:31:26Uh, your father had arranged these engagements years ago, but I didn't tell you because he
00:31:30decided to marry Jared Cooper at the time.
00:31:32She has three badass fiancés and she marries his dumb ass?
00:31:40Whatever.
00:31:41Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:31:46Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:31:51At your service.
00:31:53Me too.
00:31:59One down, two more to go.
00:32:01She's become queen!
00:32:02Bishop to G4.
00:32:07Ow!
00:32:08Ow!
00:32:09Ow!
00:32:10What the hell is that?
00:32:11The most German festin' water in the Nile River.
00:32:17Rook to A8.
00:32:23Hello?
00:32:27I thought I was king!
00:32:28No, you wish.
00:32:29The king doesn't do anything, so Alan can be my king.
00:32:33Oh, fine.
00:32:38Bankrupt to four.
00:32:39It's right this second.
00:32:45I...
00:32:47I've been bankrupt!
00:32:48No!
00:32:50Who is he?
00:32:57I've been bankrupt!
00:32:58No!
00:32:59I told you I would remove all of you from status and power if you didn't cooperate.
00:33:04Well, guess what?
00:33:05Game over.
00:33:06Alright, boys.
00:33:08Let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:33:10Oh, that's serious business.
00:33:12I'm right with you.
00:33:15Wait for me!
00:33:16Nobody beats me to the finish line!
00:33:19Angela!
00:33:22You already have three fiancés?
00:33:25You can't accuse me of cheating.
00:33:27I...
00:33:29want compensation.
00:33:32You greedy SOB.
00:33:34Who the fuck is that?
00:33:35My ex-husband.
00:33:37Wait.
00:33:38You were married?
00:33:39Yeah.
00:33:40And...
00:33:41I'm single.
00:33:42I'm single.
00:33:43I'm single.
00:33:44I'm single.
00:33:45I'm single.
00:33:46I'm single.
00:33:47You were married?
00:33:48Yeah.
00:33:49And if that's a problem for you, then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:33:53More for me?
00:33:54No, no.
00:33:55Of course not.
00:33:56Just...
00:33:57Do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:33:59Don't steal my joke!
00:34:00I can make him disappear without a trace.
00:34:02All the evidence of your past with him is gone.
00:34:05What?
00:34:06Is there something on my face?
00:34:08Uh, yeah.
00:34:09Murderous intent.
00:34:11Let's remarry!
00:34:13Let's remarry!
00:34:14You still don't realize.
00:34:17I only fell in love with you because you saved me from drowning three years ago.
00:34:44Sir!
00:34:45It's an emergency!
00:34:47We need to wreck right away!
00:34:49Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:34:53Okay, I'm on my way.
00:34:57She should be okay now.
00:35:02Hey, you!
00:35:04Watch over her.
00:35:05I'll be right back.
00:35:06You saved me.
00:35:09Fuck.
00:35:11I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:35:14Fuck.
00:35:16I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:35:18You've cheated on me.
00:35:20You've hit me.
00:35:22You've insulted me.
00:35:24And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:35:27I'm sorry.
00:35:29I'm sorry.
00:35:31I'm sorry.
00:35:33I'm sorry.
00:35:34And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:35:37I fucking hate you.
00:35:40And the Lady Blackheart.
00:35:42What now?
00:35:44Yes, we understand that you are a very busy person.
00:35:49But if you're not going to give your ex-husband the Maple Plaza project...
00:35:53How about us three?
00:35:55Yes, unlike that scumbag, we won't turn on you.
00:35:58Yeah, no.
00:36:00You're all fired for trying to throw a coup.
00:36:01But...
00:36:03This is your fault, you doofus.
00:36:05We never should have believed your bullshit.
00:36:07No.
00:36:09We can't lose our positions with Ellen Musk and the Lockhawks.
00:36:14Our family.
00:36:16I'll get you for this.
00:36:23I never should have listened to you.
00:36:25I'm ruined because of you.
00:36:31Oh.
00:36:40So.
00:36:42What's the situation here?
00:36:43I don't want to marry you.
00:36:53I don't want to marry you.
00:36:56Listen.
00:36:57I only met you guys a few hours ago.
00:37:00And I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:37:03But what if I told you that we've known each other for much longer than just a few hours.
00:37:09Much longer.
00:37:13Angela.
00:37:15Your parents would like to have a video call with all of you.
00:37:22My lovely princess, how are you?
00:37:25Look, your mother and I are in Italy.
00:37:27The views here are absolutely stunning.
00:37:30Perfect for a wedding, wouldn't you say?
00:37:32I heard you finally divorced that good-for-nothing, blood-sucking, freeloader husband of yours.
00:37:40Can't call his name.
00:37:42Anyway, congratulations.
00:37:44I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from to replace him.
00:37:49You must pick one of them to marry.
00:37:52Otherwise...
00:37:54Let me do it.
00:37:56You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:37:59Otherwise...
00:38:01We'll kill ourselves.
00:38:03Mom!
00:38:05Alright honey, that's it.
00:38:07Bye!
00:38:12So, who are you going to choose?
00:38:16Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:38:21Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:38:26That seems greedy.
00:38:33But...
00:38:35I can always remove the other two options.
00:38:38Hey!
00:38:40I may be a doctor, but I can take lives too.
00:38:43I know and have access to all the deadliest poisons in the world.
00:38:47Well, okay.
00:38:49No murder, please.
00:38:51I was just kidding.
00:38:53You have seven days to win her over.
00:38:54You have seven days to win her over.
00:38:56It's like The Bachelorette.
00:38:58I know.
00:39:00We'll start with challenge one.
00:39:03Welcome to the show, The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
00:39:07Today, we have our first challenge.
00:39:12What is all of this, Ellen?
00:39:15You'll see.
00:39:16Oh my God!
00:39:18Oh my God!
00:39:20Cockroaches!
00:39:22All women are afraid of cockroaches.
00:39:25And it is every man's job to save their beloved woman from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:39:30What will our three candidates do to prove their undying love for our single woman,
00:39:36but screaming her head off heiress?
00:39:37Looks like one of our contestants has already called it quits.
00:39:40It's up to the final two!
00:40:07Oh!
00:40:18Crunchy.
00:40:20That is sick cold.
00:40:22Hey, when you're stranded in the middle of the battlefield, you'll be glad to see one of these around.
00:40:28There are two more left.
00:40:30Wanna try one?
00:40:31God, no!
00:40:34Oh my God!
00:40:35Save me!
00:40:36Save me!
00:40:40I'm a germaphobe doctor.
00:40:42These hands can't get germs on them.
00:40:44They're for surgery and saving lives.
00:41:01Thank God you're here.
00:41:04Are you alright, honey?
00:41:06Angela!
00:41:10Alright, you won the first challenge, so your reward?
00:41:14You get to watch over her for the night.
00:41:17Just don't cross the line, if you know what I mean.
00:41:19I'm not her scumbag husband.
00:41:21You have nothing to worry about.
00:41:27Honestly, even if you guys fuck, it's not like it's against the rules or anything.
00:41:31At least my girl can get some.
00:41:33I bet her husband has a small dick anyway.
00:41:36The cockroaches!
00:41:38They're gone, they're gone.
00:41:40There's nothing in this room except you and me, okay?
00:41:43I'm going to kill Ellen when I see her tomorrow.
00:41:51I need a drink.
00:42:00Whoa, easy! You're on an empty stomach.
00:42:03Oh, what do you care?
00:42:04What do you care?
00:42:06I'm trying to drink away your sorrows, Angela.
00:42:11You guys were right.
00:42:13I was blind from marrying that asshole.
00:42:16You know, I wasted three whole years of my life with him.
00:42:22He never even loved me.
00:42:24And I gave up my entire career for him.
00:42:27Um...
00:42:31Do you really think that you would still be number one on the Forbes 30 under 30 list if I was around?
00:42:39You may not be number one on Forbes list, but you know what you're number one in?
00:42:44What?
00:42:48You're number one here.
00:42:49You know, we've known each other kind of a long time.
00:42:53Lies.
00:42:56You all just want something from me.
00:43:04Angela, I know it's hard to trust again.
00:43:09But I assure you, I don't care what family you're from.
00:43:14I'm the richest man in the nation.
00:43:16I don't need your power, your status, your wealth, your connections.
00:43:23I just need you.
00:43:27I'll prove my love to you within six days.
00:43:30I promise.
00:43:31Screw the contest.
00:43:33I just want love.
00:43:36Angela!
00:43:38You're drunk.
00:43:40I'm an adult.
00:43:41Can't I go just get what she wants?
00:43:44Okay.
00:43:46I'm sorry.
00:43:48I'm sorry.
00:43:50I'm sorry.
00:43:52I'm sorry.
00:43:54I'm sorry.
00:43:56I'm sorry.
00:43:58I'm sorry.
00:43:59Okay.
00:44:05But love and sex aren't exactly the same thing.
00:44:09Well, they're not mutually exclusive either.
00:44:21This is what you want.
00:44:29This is what you want.
00:44:49Nine inch penis.
00:44:51Morning to you too.
00:44:53You sure you were drunk last night?
00:44:54You wouldn't...
00:44:56A girl remembers when she's had a nine inch penis inside of her.
00:45:01Well, glad you enjoyed it.
00:45:03But don't tell Shane or Cole.
00:45:07Because then they would...
00:45:09Say that you were being unfair?
00:45:11Technically, us having sex doesn't break any rules.
00:45:14I won the first challenge, and according to Ellen, my prize was to spend the night with you anyways.
00:45:21Don't make this any harder than it already is.
00:45:24Okay.
00:45:27You sure you don't want it pretty hard?
00:45:31Stop.
00:45:34Fine, fine, fine.
00:45:38I won't tell.
00:45:41But only on one condition.
00:45:44I won't tell.
00:45:47But only on one condition.
00:45:49You have to go out on a date with me.
00:45:52Fine.
00:45:54Fine.
00:45:57I've had a crush on you since college, Angela.
00:46:00You never noticed me.
00:46:06You should get dressed and get out of here before anyone sees you.
00:46:12It's only 7am.
00:46:13She's still sleeping.
00:46:14Am I sleeping alone?
00:46:15Yeah, I'm not letting my fiance be alone with another man for another second.
00:46:21Morning, gentlemen.
00:46:23Oh, or shall I say ruffmen?
00:46:26Oh, don't mind him.
00:46:28What's up, guys?
00:46:30We're ready for the second challenge.
00:46:32No cockroaches this time.
00:46:34Yes, no more terrifying things.
00:46:36That was my bad, Angela.
00:46:38This better be a good challenge, Ellen.
00:46:40I'm sure you'll all enjoy this one.
00:46:42The second challenge is...
00:46:44The second challenge is...
00:46:46A date.
00:46:48Lane, I should have asked for something else.
00:46:50A date?
00:46:51That's it.
00:46:52What's the catch?
00:46:53No catch.
00:46:54Just who Ms. Lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most.
00:46:57As simple as that.
00:46:58I know what I want to do.
00:46:59Let's start with me first.
00:47:00Okay.
00:47:01Who's up first?
00:47:02Then...
00:47:03Me.
00:47:04Save the best for last.
00:47:06Ain't that right, Angela?
00:47:07Then it's decided.
00:47:12Please don't take my BMW away.
00:47:15Too bad.
00:47:16You pissed off the Lockharts.
00:47:19I have nothing left.
00:47:21I'm sorry.
00:47:28It's that bitch who ruined me.
00:47:34It's that bitch who ruined me.
00:47:44General Eisenhower, sir!
00:47:46At ease, Lieutenant.
00:47:48This is my lieutenant.
00:47:49He also manages this boxing gym.
00:47:50Pleasure to meet you, Madam Eisenhower.
00:47:52You're so serious.
00:47:54But hang on.
00:47:56Lieutenant, I don't know who I'm going to marry yet.
00:47:59Baby, I decided to take you here on our first date so that I can introduce you to my guns.
00:48:04Guns?
00:48:05Like murder weapons?
00:48:07Yes.
00:48:08Murder weapons.
00:48:20Like my guns, babe?
00:48:22Pretty Lockhart.
00:48:24Yeah.
00:48:26Let me show you what I can do with them.
00:48:28Lieutenant!
00:48:30Come close!
00:48:32Wait!
00:48:33You're just going to hit him like that?
00:48:35He's not even going to fight back?
00:48:36Fighting back would be treason, ma'am!
00:48:38Treason?
00:48:40You guys are way too serious.
00:48:42Look, you Lockhart bitch!
00:48:44I caught you!
00:48:45I caught you!
00:48:47I caught you!
00:48:48Look, you Lockhart bitch!
00:48:50I caught you!
00:48:51If I'm going down, you're all going down with me!
00:48:53Lieutenant, here's your attack!
00:49:08You dare try to hurt my wife?
00:49:12I will make you pay!
00:49:13You don't need to keep beating him up.
00:49:15We could just take him to the cops.
00:49:17Not when he tries to hurt you!
00:49:25Zoe's a bit violent.
00:49:27Some might call it being protective.
00:49:29Poor anger issues.
00:49:31What if we get married and I forget to use a coaster on an antique table or something?
00:49:35Is he going to be, like, rough?
00:49:38Hey, some girls are into that.
00:49:40I don't know if I can do that.
00:49:41I don't know if I am.
00:49:44Well, maybe Shane will be your type.
00:49:49Your date with Shane starts now.
00:49:56Hey, cool ride.
00:49:59A gift from the Chancellor of Germany when I saved his wife.
00:50:02Impressive.
00:50:06Your breath smells like peppermint.
00:50:09Refreshing.
00:50:11I got cool mint, too.
00:50:13Or do you prefer spearmint?
00:50:16What do you not have in this coat of yours?
00:50:19Fruit flavored gum.
00:50:21I can't stand those.
00:50:23So, where are you taking me, Shane?
00:50:25Let me show you.
00:50:32Dr. Wilson!
00:50:34Our VIP of VIPs!
00:50:36Right this way.
00:50:38VIP of VIPs.
00:50:40Ah, just some other guy I saved.
00:50:42I forget who.
00:50:44You saved a lot of people.
00:50:46I do what I can.
00:50:48Oh my gosh!
00:50:50It's my gold-digging neighbor who just got dumped by her husband.
00:50:55Sandra Miller, what are you doing here?
00:50:58I just thought this was for the VIP of VIPs.
00:51:00Your mother-in-law told me all about the divorce and how you hired some gigolo to beat her and Kaylee Vanderbilt up.
00:51:08How low of you.
00:51:10What are you doing here, Sandra?
00:51:12Of course your bird brain wouldn't remember.
00:51:14I sell high fashion jewelry pieces so high-end, you couldn't even afford even a few soldier organs.
00:51:20The auction begins.
00:51:22I'll deal with you later.
00:51:25Here, I'll just be one second.
00:51:32Cameron, I have a task for you.
00:51:34Our next piece is absolutely extraordinary.
00:51:38Cleopatra's armband, sold by our vendor, Sandra Miller, for five million dollars.
00:51:46Excuse me.
00:51:48I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:51:51It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:51:54I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:51:57It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:51:59What are you doing?
00:52:01Just watch.
00:52:02Just watch.
00:52:04Come on.
00:52:09That is Queen Victoria's ring?
00:52:12Please, I'm an expert and that's a fake.
00:52:15She probably got it at the flea market she works at.
00:52:18You work at a flea market?
00:52:19Not this again.
00:52:21Cut the bullshit, that wouldn't even sell for five dollars.
00:52:24Oh yeah? Here, you want it? For free.
00:52:27Ew, I don't want that trash from a stinky hippie peddler.
00:52:30Well, that's too bad then, because you are the fraud.
00:52:36What are you talking about? Who the hell are you to accuse me?
00:52:40Throw them out.
00:52:42Dr. Wilson, I know you're a legend in medicine, but we're professionals.
00:52:47Oh yeah? And that armband sells for five million dollars?
00:52:51Yeah, mine is the real thing.
00:52:54You two are just upset because you're too poor to afford our luxury items.
00:52:58Oh, is that so?
00:53:00When a so-called expert failed to recognize Queen Victoria's ring then?
00:53:04Dear Lord.
00:53:06This is real.
00:53:08It's authentic.
00:53:10It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:53:15Karen, what have you found?
00:53:18Yeah, that picture of Cleopatra's armband you sent me?
00:53:21It's a replica.
00:53:23They had the same one right here at the flea market.
00:53:25So, you're the fraud.
00:53:29You just went to the flea market so you can buy some fakes.
00:53:32And Cameron, how much are these fakes being sold for?
00:53:36150.
00:53:38Wow, not even five dollars. Sandra.
00:53:42You've been duping us the whole time? Arrest her!
00:53:47No! Please! This is my time! Please!
00:53:51What's going on, Dr. Wilson?
00:53:52Uh, investigating lead poisoning from cheap jewelry for the Emperor of Japan. Bye.
00:53:57Black Callista from the jewelry industry forever.
00:54:08I had a really great time tonight.
00:54:11Me too.
00:54:13May I have a kiss?
00:54:16May I have a kiss?
00:54:33Something wrong?
00:54:35Do you always have gum in your mouth?
00:54:42Yep. You never have to worry about stinky breath from me.
00:54:46Thanks.
00:54:56You owe us a bunch of money, Cooper.
00:55:00I don't have any money.
00:55:02How did you pay for this hotel then?
00:55:05I guess you'll only pay up if I break your other leg.
00:55:12Stop!
00:55:16Mr. Vanderbilt.
00:55:19Mr. Buffett.
00:55:24This is the contract for the Maple Plaza project.
00:55:27That's right. Miss Musk wanted me to give it to you.
00:55:30I knew Angelo was still in love with me.
00:55:33I knew Angelo was still in love with me.
00:55:36No, no. Sorry about those injuries from earlier. It was all just a little misunderstanding.
00:55:42Yeah, we could be partners again.
00:55:44And then maybe you can tell Lady Lockhart to put in a good word for us?
00:55:49Angela still loves me. She's just throwing a fit. She'll be back to me soon enough.
00:55:54Yeah. Do you need any help winning her back? We can give you jewelry to give to her.
00:55:59I was just sucking up to these pricks a few days ago, but now they're all begging me to help them out.
00:56:05It feels so damn good to be in power.
00:56:08Sure. I'll put in a good word for you.
00:56:11I'll put in a good word for you.
00:56:13I just need...
00:56:14Anything you tell us, we'll give you anything.
00:56:17Once I take everything from these idiots, I'll go after Angela Lockhart for my revenge.
00:56:29I'm giving the contract to Jared Cooper, just like you asked me to.
00:56:33Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:56:37Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:56:39I don't get it, Ms. Musk.
00:56:41That contract has a preliminary clause. It requires him to pay 50% of the costs upfront as a deposit.
00:56:47And if he can't, then what?
00:56:49He'll be bankrupt.
00:56:51So as long as he's greedy enough to take it.
00:56:54I'm avenging my best friend. I want to show the world that without Angela Lockhart, he's nothing.
00:57:06I signed the Maple Plaza Project.
00:57:09We should celebrate.
00:57:11You did? You see, I know my son has it in him.
00:57:15That skank Angela is nothing next to you.
00:57:18And it's all thanks to you, sweetheart.
00:57:21Actually, it's thanks to Angela.
00:57:26What?
00:57:28You're trying to ditch me to go back to your wife?
00:57:31Oh, no, no, no, no. He's not.
00:57:33Jared, what are you doing?
00:57:35You have such a beautiful and bright future ahead of you.
00:57:37It's my decision, Mom. I'm the head of the house here.
00:57:41I'm telling my dad.
00:57:43Fine. Go right ahead. He has enough problems himself.
00:57:46If you're obedient, I'll keep you around as his side piece.
00:57:49But if not, you can scram.
00:57:51Dad, Jared is being mean to me. Teach him a lesson.
00:57:56Kaylee, be a good girl, okay?
00:57:58Jared has the backing of some very powerful people now.
00:58:02Don't get on his bad side.
00:58:04We can't afford to piss him off.
00:58:05So do as he says.
00:58:07Dad!
00:58:15I'm sorry.
00:58:17I'll be your side piece.
00:58:19Very good. I'm happy you've come around.
00:58:22Now let's go celebrate.
00:58:26I mean, do I really want to be with Mr. Minty Mouth forever, though?
00:58:31But that tongue action, though.
00:58:33Tongue is important.
00:58:35In more than just one spot.
00:58:37Erling, we aren't in public.
00:58:39It's true.
00:58:41Stomachache.
00:58:43Again?
00:58:45I have to run to the bathroom.
00:58:47Devin should be here to pick you up soon.
00:58:49Devin's late.
00:58:51Not a good sign for a date.
00:58:54This hotel restaurant has five Michelin stars.
00:58:58It's her.
00:59:00And she's alone. With no one to save her.
00:59:03You whore.
00:59:05You seduced my son so he'd get back with you.
00:59:11Let me tell you.
00:59:13I would never go back even if your entire family got down on their knees and begged me.
00:59:20Hey, you guys can fight all you want.
00:59:22But you need to take this somewhere else.
00:59:24Whoever gets rid of her for me gets all this.
00:59:27What? Why do I have to leave?
00:59:29She's the one starting shit.
00:59:30Because I have money and you don't.
00:59:32You're just a stinky hippie peddler.
00:59:34And my son just signed a 100 billion dollar contract.
00:59:38He still got the contract?
00:59:40Hmm.
00:59:42Must be Ellen's doing.
00:59:44Even if he does sign it,
00:59:46he doesn't have the liquidity to pay the deposit up front.
00:59:48Oh, he's just gonna...
00:59:50Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:59:53Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:59:55Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
01:00:00You take my charity
01:00:02and toss it in my face
01:00:04as if it's your own.
01:00:06My maid wouldn't even pick up such a pitiful amount.
01:00:08One thousand dollars to take her away.
01:00:11Two thousand dollars to drag her away.
01:00:14Five thousand dollars to beat her away.
01:00:20Oh, oh, hey!
01:00:22Hey! Ow!
01:00:23Hey!
01:00:26You okay?
01:00:28Are you hurt?
01:00:32Weakling.
01:00:34You! You!
01:00:36Just a few days ago you found yourself a boy toy
01:00:38right after getting divorced.
01:00:40And now you have two more?
01:00:42What a whore.
01:00:44What a whore.
01:00:46Yeah, and Jared wanted to get back with her?
01:00:48What if she has an STD?
01:00:50Oh, like sleeping with a married man
01:00:51wouldn't give you an STD.
01:00:53Let's go.
01:00:55We'll expose her to Jared.
01:00:57Hang on.
01:00:59What do you want?
01:01:01I'll scream.
01:01:03I don't hit women.
01:01:05But I never said I don't kill women.
01:01:07But I never said I don't kill women.
01:01:10Oh, God.
01:01:12He is a murderer.
01:01:14What if he murders me?
01:01:16Not him. Definitely not him.
01:01:17We're not afraid of you.
01:01:19That's enough.
01:01:21This isn't a war zone.
01:01:23You'll be removed from being a five-star general
01:01:25if you hurt a civilian without adequate cause.
01:01:27I was just messing with him.
01:01:29Was he, though?
01:01:31We're not afraid of you.
01:01:33Jared!
01:01:35You have to avenge us.
01:01:37Look at this slut.
01:01:39She's found two more boy toys.
01:01:41She's cheating on you.
01:01:43Don't get back with her.
01:01:45Oh, Mr. Cooper, it's you.
01:01:47The party crashes immediately
01:01:49so that you can go to your salvation banquet.
01:01:51Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:01:53Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:01:55The party crashes.
01:01:58Oh!
01:02:00You have any idea who that is?
01:02:02That's my wife.
01:02:04You saved that title for the real skank over there.
01:02:06That's right.
01:02:08Know your place.
01:02:10Shut up.
01:02:12She's cheating on you.
01:02:14Know your place.
01:02:16She's the one who that is.
01:02:18Eric, have you gone mad?
01:02:20This is Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
01:02:22You slap her for this whore?
01:02:24Mom!
01:02:26They really think they're something, huh?
01:02:28Angela's an heiress to a family
01:02:30whose wealth and status goes back to the Victorian age.
01:02:32She's richer even than Ellen Musk.
01:02:34I only got the Maple Closet Project
01:02:36because she gave it to me.
01:02:38What?
01:02:40You apologize right now
01:02:42or I will kick you and your father to the curb.
01:02:44I...
01:02:46I...
01:02:48I'm sorry.
01:02:50No.
01:02:52This can't be.
01:02:54I made you a divorce.
01:02:58Go home.
01:03:00You're not suited to come with me
01:03:02to my celebration banquet.
01:03:08I apologize on behalf of my mother.
01:03:11Honey, I know you came
01:03:12here to celebrate my achievements.
01:03:14I promise no one will bother you anymore.
01:03:16I didn't come here for you.
01:03:18I'm on a date.
01:03:20A date with two men at the same time?
01:03:23She really is a whore.
01:03:25Angela, please forgive me.
01:03:27I really do love you.
01:03:30Oh-ho!
01:03:32Lady Knockout is here!
01:03:35Oh-ho!
01:03:37Lady Knockout is here!
01:03:39Oh-ho!
01:03:40Lady Knockout is here!
01:03:42Yeah, yeah, we already know
01:03:44you beat Ford's ass.
01:03:46We're too old for that.
01:03:48They're here for my celebration banquet.
01:03:50Please, you gave me the contract
01:03:52so if anyone should go
01:03:54as my guest of honor, it should be you.
01:03:56Oh, yes, please, Ms. Knockout.
01:03:58Join us.
01:04:00We'll all be one happy business family again.
01:04:02What the hell are you all doing here?
01:04:04Where were you?
01:04:06Stomach issues.
01:04:08Again?
01:04:09Would you like my diagnosis?
01:04:11No.
01:04:13Let me make myself clear.
01:04:15Okay?
01:04:17I would rather die
01:04:19than be with you again.
01:04:21Seems that they're not actually
01:04:23on good terms.
01:04:25I can't lose face in front of these pricks.
01:04:27Otherwise, they'll cut me off, too.
01:04:29Angela, I know you're still mad,
01:04:31but please give me a chance.
01:04:33I'll prove it to you.
01:04:35You want a chance?
01:04:37Angela, no.
01:04:39I'll take him back.
01:04:41I'll give you two choices.
01:04:45I'll give you two choices.
01:04:48Me
01:04:50or the contract.
01:04:52You're kidding me.
01:04:54No, I'm not kidding you.
01:04:56If you choose me,
01:04:58we can remarry this week.
01:05:00But you don't get the $100 billion contract.
01:05:03The choice is all yours.
01:05:05That's a tough choice.
01:05:07You think so?
01:05:09He either marries a royal heiress
01:05:11or gets a contract that takes his company to the moon.
01:05:13Either way, he benefits.
01:05:15Why can't I have both?
01:05:17You really are a greedy bastard.
01:05:19Angela, I saved you in the pool, remember?
01:05:22I deserve the contract.
01:05:24Did you really?
01:05:29Look who's fashionably late now.
01:05:32He didn't save her at the pool.
01:05:34Wait, what?
01:05:36What are you talking about?
01:05:37I choose the contract.
01:05:39I knew it.
01:05:41You'll get what's coming to you.
01:05:43With this contract,
01:05:45my company's earning potential is limitless.
01:05:47Angela Lockhart,
01:05:49you humiliated me in front of everyone.
01:05:51I will get you one day.
01:05:53Let me show you something.
01:05:55You saved me.
01:06:00You saved me.
01:06:03I'm sorry
01:06:05if his lies led to you wasting
01:06:073 years of your life.
01:06:10But I promise you.
01:06:12I'm going to make it up to you.
01:06:14I promise you.
01:06:16I'll do anything.
01:06:18I will show you something.
01:06:20I'm going to show you something.
01:06:22I will show you something.
01:06:23I'm going to make it up to you with the rest of our lives.
01:06:27No, no, I wasn't lying.
01:06:29I just couldn't, can't remember exactly what happened that day.
01:06:40Does that mean we both each saved her once?
01:06:44What?
01:06:45Me?
01:06:46Dr. Wilson?
01:06:47Losing at saving people?
01:06:49No way.
01:06:50You guys, one of you, do something life-threatening right now.
01:06:54You're crazy.
01:06:56And actually, they've all been doing horrible shit behind your back.
01:07:01What?
01:07:04Mr. Sterling had me investigate their company's dealings.
01:07:07Turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts.
01:07:11Put it simply, they've been stealing from you.
01:07:14I can't believe I didn't realize.
01:07:17Mall Card, I'm so sorry.
01:07:19I should have had third-party accountants check thoroughly.
01:07:22No, it's not your fault.
01:07:23They're just too slick.
01:07:25You'd like me to punish them for you?
01:07:27Oh God, no.
01:07:28Not that again.
01:07:29Please.
01:07:30Max, you know what to do.
01:07:46The banks have pulled all of our funds.
01:07:48All business ties have been severed.
01:07:50We're bankrupt.
01:07:56How did you do that?
01:07:58Who are you?
01:07:59And don't say Spider-Man.
01:08:03I'll tell you who I am.
01:08:06I'll tell you who I am.
01:08:11I am Crypto Punk Number Two.
01:08:14What did he say he was?
01:08:15That's more bizarre than Spider-Man.
01:08:19You're Crypto Punk Number Two?
01:08:21Well, I'm Crypto Punk Number One.
01:08:24See?
01:08:25You are number one at something.
01:08:26The most expensive NFT collection in the world.
01:08:29Forget Forbes' list.
01:08:31It's all about young money now.
01:08:33So, how about our date?
01:08:42I'm not letting them one-up me on this one.
01:08:44I'll spy too.
01:08:58They forgot to cancel my contract.
01:09:01I still have the $100 billion project.
01:09:05Yes!
01:09:06I'm rich!
01:09:08I'm going to make them all pay soon!
01:09:16What?
01:09:17Mr. Cooper, sir.
01:09:18The Maple Plaza contract requires us to provide 50% of the costs up front.
01:09:22Otherwise, it's a breach of contract and we'll have to pay for all financial repercussions.
01:09:27No!
01:09:29I'm bankrupt.
01:09:32You tricked me!
01:09:39Allow me.
01:09:43I'm sorry I was late, my queen.
01:09:45I had to get some very important materials for our special date.
01:09:51Well, cheers.
01:09:54Cheers.
01:10:03This looks good.
01:10:09Did you use my spices?
01:10:11I know your ex-in-law has never appreciated you.
01:10:16You can have all the money and power in the world and you still can't force a man to love you.
01:10:23I couldn't even remember our anniversary.
01:10:29Angela.
01:10:32Your future with me is going to be different.
01:10:38Come on.
01:10:40Yes!
01:10:59Wow.
01:11:01Devon, I can't believe this is what I've been missing out on these past few years.
01:11:05Just because of some silly mistake.
01:11:08Angela, I've known and loved you for three whole years.
01:11:13Actually, I've also loved you for three years.
01:11:17That's right. I fell in love with you three years ago, too.
01:11:21How is all of this possible?
01:11:24I didn't meet any of you until recently.
01:11:27Well, actually, maybe Devon, but...
01:11:32I've had a crush on you since college.
01:11:35You're my motivation to go to business school.
01:11:39Despite who you were, you never judged me for being poor.
01:11:45Are you trying to get hired at Fortune 500 in a suit like that?
01:11:53All you do is babble on and on about Internet money, Bitcoin, and shit like that.
01:12:01If you're trying to steal my spot, I'll teach you a lesson.
01:12:08Hey! Get away from him!
01:12:10Angela!
01:12:12Fancy girl. I like her.
01:12:25How is he?
01:12:27It's a poison made from a mixture of dried roots found in Africa.
01:12:32Can it be cured?
01:12:34I actually think I know that poison.
01:12:36It sounds really scary, but its cure can actually be found in any developed country.
01:12:40Household salt.
01:12:48I like her.
01:12:51There you go.
01:12:55Oh, shoot. I'm late for swim practice.
01:13:05I like her.
01:13:07We have been rivals ever since.
01:13:09So, that's how I... well, we all met.
01:13:15I barely remember.
01:13:17I should have never let you go to swim practice that day.
01:13:20Matthew Richards, the guy who poisoned me, attacked you out of revenge.
01:13:24You wouldn't have known.
01:13:26I did hear he dropped out and became a loan shark, though.
01:13:28If that makes you feel any better.
01:13:30Yeah, I think that suits him a little better.
01:13:32Yeah.
01:13:33Angela, your seven days is almost up.
01:13:35Now that you know they all loved and fought for you for three years, who will you pick?
01:13:45How can that be?
01:13:47Angela Lockhart is an heiress?
01:13:54Kaylee, we've gone bankrupt.
01:13:58Bankrupt?
01:14:00The Vanderbilt's have gone bankrupt?
01:14:03Well then, get out of here!
01:14:06You can't do this to me!
01:14:10Jared!
01:14:11Mom, it's me.
01:14:12What happened?
01:14:14Jared, I have carefully reconsidered.
01:14:17Angela is way better than this dimwit.
01:14:19You should get back with your wife.
01:14:21We're bankrupt.
01:14:23What?
01:14:27Jared Cooper.
01:14:30We're here to propose to your belongings.
01:14:34No one is going to save you now.
01:14:37Mom!
01:14:40What kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs?
01:14:47Who will you pick?
01:14:51I...
01:14:57I brought you fried chicken.
01:14:59Fried chicken?
01:15:00Hey, not all girls like sushi and caviar.
01:15:02Yeah, he's right. I did live in Atlanta for three months.
01:15:05Sucking up last minute!
01:15:07At least I don't speak like an AI robot.
01:15:10Hey, stop. Stop.
01:15:13Welcome back to the bachelorette.
01:15:16I mean, the three badasses who want me.
01:15:19I mean, Angela Lockhart...
01:15:22You know what I mean.
01:15:24Today, our heiress bachelorette will choose
01:15:27which one of our three badasses will she marry.
01:15:31Will it be Shane, the doctor?
01:15:35Cole, the general?
01:15:39Or Devin, the CEO?
01:15:44Uh, looks like our bachelorette may need a little more time to decide.
01:15:49Oh, the suspense is killing me.
01:15:52But when she does, she will take this eternal rose
01:15:55made from glass imported from Venice
01:15:58and give it to our woman.
01:16:00Angela.
01:16:03Angela.
01:16:04Oh, I, uh...
01:16:08I need more time to think.
01:16:13Uh, while our bachelorette takes a little time to decide,
01:16:17why don't we check in with each of our candidates?
01:16:20Let's check in with each of our candidates.
01:16:23Let's start with Cole.
01:16:25Cole.
01:16:28There's not much to say.
01:16:30Who wouldn't want a five-star general
01:16:32who has huge biceps,
01:16:35a massive chest,
01:16:37who would protect their wife?
01:16:41Okay, thank you.
01:16:43Uh, Shane?
01:16:46Muscles, money,
01:16:49they won't get you so far.
01:16:51But you need a well-balanced man like me
01:16:53that has more than one way to keep a lady happy.
01:16:56If you know what I mean.
01:17:00Okay, I think we do.
01:17:02And Devin.
01:17:05That was quite disgusting.
01:17:09I just hope Angela's okay.
01:17:11I know she's going under a lot of stress right now.
01:17:14A lot of choices to make.
01:17:16And she's my queen.
01:17:18I just really hope she's okay.
01:17:20Now, one more thing.
01:17:22What kind of a doctor
01:17:24What kind of a doctor
01:17:26brings fried chicken to a girl?
01:17:28That's a good point.
01:17:30It's bad for her heart.
01:17:32And then you!
01:17:34What?
01:17:35You know what they say about military men.
01:17:38They beef their wives.
01:17:44Enough!
01:17:46Stand up!
01:17:49Hey, you guys.
01:17:51Whoa, break it up!
01:17:53Hey!
01:17:54Break it up!
01:17:59Cut to commercial!
01:18:01Cut to commercial!
01:18:03Cut to commercial!
01:18:05Cut to commercial!
01:18:07Cut to commercial!
01:18:09Cut to commercial!
01:18:19This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my entire life.
01:18:25Who do I choose?
01:18:33Angela's marrying me.
01:18:35You're not stealing her from me.
01:18:36Oh yeah?
01:18:38I may be a doctor, but like I said,
01:18:40I know and possess the deadliest poisons in the world.
01:18:46What don't you have in that cup?
01:18:48Fruit flavored gum.
01:18:50I won't let you take Angela away from me.
01:18:52I'll fight you to the death.
01:18:54Don't forget about me.
01:18:56It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:19:00These stupid profile cards don't make any sense.
01:19:04They do not help.
01:19:06Who made these?
01:19:25It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:19:30I'm actually a part of the X-Men.
01:19:33And I have the power of telekinesis!
01:19:52We may have to work together to take him down.
01:20:00Okay.
01:20:05This battle within our heads is the most intense I've ever experienced.
01:20:09I may not be able to take them both down if they decide to team up.
01:20:13Hmm...
01:20:14Winter mint?
01:20:15Or cool mint?
01:20:20You know,
01:20:22I've always really liked your hair.
01:20:24Really?
01:20:26I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it.
01:20:29So I appreciate that.
01:20:32And you know,
01:20:34I've always really liked the way you talk.
01:20:37Really?
01:20:42What do you got for me?
01:20:44I've always really liked the way you chew gum.
01:20:47Yeah?
01:20:48It's fresh, right?
01:20:53You're actually a really good doctor.
01:20:56You need me to look at you?
01:21:00Angela's been kidnapped!
01:21:02Angela's been kidnapped!
01:21:04It was Jared Cooper!
01:21:06That fucker!
01:21:08We have to find her.
01:21:09What, how?
01:21:10Her ring.
01:21:11Her dad installed a GPS tracking mechanism on her ring just in case.
01:21:14Well, let's go then!
01:21:16My fiancé!
01:21:17My fiancé!
01:21:20Jared...
01:21:25What am I doing here?
01:21:27You destroyed me.
01:21:30I took everything.
01:21:33What?
01:21:34I have nothing left.
01:21:36It's not my fault you were too greedy.
01:21:39I was greedy?
01:21:40To have sex with my wife?
01:21:42What?
01:21:44I'm not your wife!
01:21:46I'm not your wife!
01:21:48I'm not your wife anymore!
01:21:50Oh yeah, I know.
01:21:51You wouldn't take me back now, not unless I get you pregnant with my child.
01:21:54This is illegal!
01:21:55You wouldn't want your child to be away from its father.
01:21:58You won't have me arrested.
01:22:00You will take me back.
01:22:04Come on, bitch.
01:22:07I'll settle you down a little.
01:22:10Please...
01:22:17You will be begging me to fuck you soon.
01:22:22Hey!
01:22:24Angela, come here!
01:22:29You're too late!
01:22:30I drugged her.
01:22:31She'll be dead soon unless...
01:22:32Yet?
01:22:33Have you forgotten who I am?
01:22:36He really does have everything in his coat.
01:22:38Everything except for fruit.
01:22:39Yeah, except for fruit-flavored gum.
01:22:40We get it already.
01:22:41Just save my balls!
01:22:44Here you go.
01:22:50You're all good now.
01:22:52Oh, thank God.
01:22:54But what do we do with that piece of shit?
01:22:56What?
01:22:57What are you going to do to me?
01:22:59Hey, stop!
01:23:00No, don't!
01:23:02Enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever.
01:23:09Glad we didn't actually have that fight.
01:23:11Turns out he's the most dangerous of them all.
01:23:20So who did you pick, sweetheart?
01:23:22We've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding.
01:23:25The Prince of Bhutan.
01:23:27And remember, we will kill ourselves if you don't choose.
01:23:32Welcome back to the finale of...
01:23:34The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:23:36We're down to the wire.
01:23:38Literally.
01:23:39The wedding day.
01:23:40But who's the groom?
01:23:54Welcome back to the finale of...
01:23:56The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:23:58Welcome back to the finale of...
01:24:00The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:24:02But who's the groom?
01:24:07Seems our heiress still hasn't decided.
01:24:11Any input from the parents?
01:24:13Maybe that will help sway our bachelorette's choice.
01:24:16This is exciting.
01:24:18Who should my daughter pick?
01:24:21Let me think.
01:24:25I like the doctor.
01:24:27He's cute.
01:24:30But the general looks like a strong fellow.
01:24:34And we can't forget about Devon Sterling, the one who's loved her the longest.
01:24:38Isn't that right, Devon?
01:24:40Angela.
01:24:47You are all three very fine gentlemen.
01:24:52And I'm really grateful for all of your love.
01:24:56But this was a really hard decision.
01:24:59And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:25:05And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:25:13I'm just kidding. I'm just as sick of this as you guys are.
01:25:20Each of our candidates have saved our main character.
01:25:24I mean, bachelorette, once.
01:25:26They've all proven their undying love.
01:25:29So who gets to unlock Angela Lockhart's heart?
01:25:32Literally.
01:25:35Could it be the sexy and protective, general with a temper, Mr. Cole Eisenhower?
01:25:42Or the fun, wicked-minded, but kind of weird, Dr. Shane Wilson?
01:25:56And last but not least, could it be the richest man of them all?
01:26:01The man Angela would have married a long time ago, Mr. Devon Sterling.
01:26:07Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure getting to know you.
01:26:12May the best man win.
01:26:15May the best man win.
01:26:18Drum roll, please.
01:26:33Seriously, Ricky?
01:26:36I don't know.
01:26:42I choose...
01:26:53I need a powerful, strong man who I really feel like he can protect me.
01:26:59Who could resist those guns?
01:27:02Could I interest you in an N.F.D., Ellen?
01:27:04Yeah, I'd be like a full-body checkup.
01:27:20Shane, it's you. I'm lovesick for you.
01:27:23You like that minty flavor, don't you?
01:27:25Yeah.
01:27:27It's that tongue action, ladies and gents.
01:27:30Ellen, be my new queen. I hope we can go together.
01:27:46It's always been you.
01:27:57I'll always love you.
01:28:01Let's give it up for those nine inches, everybody.
01:28:04Mr. Devon, would you like a full-body checkup?
01:28:07Have you seen my murdering weapons?
01:28:09I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:28:26I'm sorry.
01:28:46I, Celine Lovett, accept my role as Nightwind's pack Luna and your wife.
01:28:54I, Alexander Kane, fucking love you.
01:29:13Wow. Two alphas together.